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How getting cancer, having my dreams crushed and being paralysed for 4 months made me a into man. (self.)

submitted by IckeSvensk

I was born in 1997 to a loving small indian family in Norway, needless to say I was not not the most athletic kid (curry doesn't do that to you). Since the age of three years old I had a passion for soccer, I grew up improving my skills to become a better player playing with older boys. At the age of 14 I played with the domestic big teams academy, I was being matched with players two times my own size and up to three years older than me. I was scouted and brought to England for one month to try in a big team. My tryout went well and they advised me to start working out with my own bodyweight, I was only around 4'7" and weighed around 90 lbs. I was sent home during a Norwegian championship cup for under 16 year old boys as I was tackled and had to go out with an injury to my knee. I was the youngest player to ever participate in that tournament and I was named man of the match in 4 games of the 6 I played in. I won the top score trophy of the cup and played to the top three finalist. I was later sent to a hospital for a full checkup because who I had my current youth contract with had received a small bid for me from the English team academy I tried out for, they wanted to make sure everything was alright with me physically.

My mother quit her job and started looking for an apartment in England, my father sold one of his cars so we would have the money. He decided to stay in Norway because he had a business there, but was going to visit us often. When I reached the hospital, I had several tests done. Some of them pretty weird, but I didn't think much of what they were trying to do and I was just trying to get through the tests so that I could travel to England and do my best for my dream. I was talked about in the local newspapers and they said to 'watch out for me'. I was described as a 'clinical finisher', and a 'skillfull dribbler with good vision for passes'. My father was so proud that he bought and framed several of those newspapers and because of my low weight and height he called me his "little Messi" (Messi is a short footballer).

The day before I was going to meet with the English club about the contract proposal, the hospital results came in. I decided to go by myself, I figured it was only gonna be some papers I had to bring back to the club and nothing else as my knee felt better and I had been back on the field training. I got there and they asked me where my parents were. When I told them where they were, they gave me some water and told me to go to a seperate waiting room. I went there and played on my phone while waiting for the doctor to come back with the results. After an hour I got bored and went and asked how much longer I would have to wait. To my big surprise I walked in and saw my mother and father crying in the hallway. I ran over to my mother and hugged her, I asked her whats wrong. She didnt reply.

My doctor brought us to the waiting room where he sat me down and told me I had Lymphotic Leukemia. I didnt really know what it meant, but when he started to describe the chemotherapy I would have to undergo before I was allowed to play football again I was devastated. I called my head coach and told him to meet me at the academy. With my mother and father I told him that I was forced to quit to the the cancer and could therefore not sign a new contract.

I fought cancer for three years. I lost so much weight and my height didn't change much, I was fragile, skinny and hairless. I hated myself. I didn't have many friends outside of football, so I was also a loner in class. I decided to study hard and get good grades will undergoing chemo. I got straight As on my exams and finished at the age of 17.

Due to some bad nurse a needle in my back to extract bone marrow tissue went wrong and I lost all the feeling below my waist for 4 months (as if things could get any worse). I couldn't even control my pissing and shitting and I couldn't walk. When I finally had won against the cancer I was 5'1 and 75 lbs. Nothing but skin and bones. A broken human with no desire to live. I had to learn how to walk again, I had to learn how to stand, the muscles in my legs were gone. The hospital followed up with me with a nutrient expert and physiotherapist. By the end of my first year at the hospital I had grown to almost 5'4 and around 105 lbs. I was working out and tried my best to achieve my initial dream of becoming a footballer but I failed due to being physically and mentally drained by the cancer, I decided to let go of that dream and focus on my future.

I was now 5'6 at 115 lbs, 18 years old. Still small but I was trying to get bigger. My schoolgrades were improving, I was feeling better about myself and I started looking into the manosphere, stoicism and positive masculinity. While in the hospital bed I read everything I could and I felt something light up inside me that I hadn't felt since my football days. I wanted to become big, I wanted to become strong, I wanted to improve my self in all aspects and prove to myself that I was still a man. During the next two years I started to workout and improving myself and my confidence while going to school. I never played football again but I managed to get a first class managing license.

Today

Today I am 5'8, 170 lbs 21 years old, lean and athletic with hopes to become bigger and stronger. Im going to law school to pursue my dream, I have a pretty and feminine girlfriend that does everything for me, we both live together, she is studying to become a nurse. Im a head coach of a local football team, consisting of boys ages 9 on the side of my studying and work. I also workout 6 times per week. I only eat healthy, no smoke and no alcohol (cancer was fun once but would be pretty lame to experience twice). The manosphere and Stoicism has helped me in such a way I cant even begin to describe how thankful I am for every man that has contributed to this space. I have a rock solid frame from the hardships I had to go through, nothing phases me anymore and I get the shit that needs to be done, done, without crying or whining about why it happened to me and why I am a victim and have it worse than everyone else. Because that is what men do. And I can finally say without being ashamed that I am a man. Thanks again for helping me become the man I am today, sorry for the sob story, but I wanted to share my experience with you to show that no matter how bad you think you have it, all you have to do is stay grounded, maintain your frame and focus on the solutions to the problems you have, solving them one by one until you succeed. Success is so much sweeter when you have been through hardships. Thank you again.


[–]modSlyGradient[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children)

Post is currently under investigation for authenticity.

Update: Appears to be a real story, but may not belong to the OP.

[–]apskidb 125 points126 points  (0 children)

bravo. more power to you. good luck for the future.

[–]CapnPoot 77 points78 points  (0 children)

Damn man, what a comeback story. Happy to hear youre killing it

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 231 points232 points  (4 children)

I'm sorry but where's the misogyny? I was told there would be misogyny, but all I can find here is a buffet of badass.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 21 points22 points  (0 children)

where's the misogyny

Beat cancer, got big, now spinning plates like a magician

There, that's better

[–]xxcups 6 points7 points  (1 child)

OP is a goal-oriented man who gets shit done. He does not fear the impossible but tackles the unknown head on and never bitches or complains. His story inspires men to become stronger and work harder: and dissuades us from being blue pill popping pusyboy victim betas like women and society say we should act.

[–][deleted] 115 points116 points  (3 children)

God damn this story was incredible, good job buddy. I am happy everything is going well and wish you the best of luck.

[–]this_weeks_account2 46 points47 points  (2 children)

Agreed. Sometimes in TRP we get sidetracked with betas, autism and a bunch of other sometimes stupid shit but this...this is an important story.

[–]tinderoglu 1 points1 points [recovered]

Important stories are for complete betas broo if you want to read important stories why don’t you head on down to the romance section in your local soyboy bookstore where all the other soyboy autistic guys with no frame hangout!1 /s

[–]this_weeks_account2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Beta faggot! Chad would destroy you! Lol

[–]Self-honest 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Good on you man. I've been through some rough times facing my own mortality, not walking for a year, crawling to the bathroom, depression, and the other health problems that come from such major issues. Not to mention the financial burden. It's great climbing back out of that hole and seeing daylight. Life is fucking wonderful. Keep pushing.

[–]Aditya77-scorpio 18 points19 points  (0 children)

No life story in here, no FR can match yours. You are the very definition of a man ! You inspire !

[–]ThatGuyIam123 14 points15 points  (0 children)

You were lucky to find this place at such a young age. I'm not sure you would have survived without us. Seriously. TRP saves lives and not just figuratively. It saved mine.

[–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker 107 points108 points  (9 children)

This is some inspiring shit.

To all yall NON-cancer having, NON-paralyzed, privileged indians and asians and short people bitching and moaning about how "game doesn't work" and "looks is the only way" and there's no way you can be alpha and be fucking women... it's time to just kill yaselves. Because a 5'4'' fucked up little cancer brown boy showed you it was possible. So if you still can't admit that you just need to take responsibility and fix yourself from the foundation up, then just off yourselves.

99.9% of men can at least reach a SMV that's high enough to participate as an alpha in the sexual marketplace - let's say a SMV of 8. At this point if you still choose to believe you're pre-determined to be an incel forever due to genetic lottery, in spite of countless resources and information and help to improve your SMV, then you're better off dead.

This is proof that (some) men harden under pressure, and struggle is required to forge stronger men. So if you don't have cancer and you have a successful comfortable life, you need to constantly put yourself under some kind of evolutionary pressure to survive and thrive. Take on hardships - for example if you're a fatass, try to make the journey to being healthy and ripped as hard as possible. Do fasts, don't cook your food to be tasty, just steam everything as blandly as possible - don't try to make it easier. Make it as hard as you can - you'll grow that way.

Again congrats OP, I took this opportunity to go off on a rant, but my hope is that stories like yours can encourage guys on here to harden the fuck up, stop bitching, and actually push themselves to achieve something with the opportunities they take for granted.

[–]Aditya77-scorpio 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I wrote my little dumb comment praising the OP thinking 'yeah, I get it'. And then I see you add this huge value to the thread. How humbling?

[–]clavabot 6 points7 points  (0 children)

But wait what if you need to have cancer and be parlayed to be a indian alpha.

/s

But low key this is proving that in order to be a man you need to conquer, the struggle or fight or challenge that you need to over come is mandatory.

But then you run into the problem of romanticizing the struggle and you stop trying to improve because your thinking first i need to be at -100 to get to +100 vs being greatfull for being at +10 trying to get to +100.

[–][deleted] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

99.9% of men can at least reach a SMV that's high enough to participate as an alpha in the sexual marketplace - let's say a SMV of 8.

Example of a man of SMV 8? To me that is pretty high and unless u are at least genetically average u need to become either semi-famous and/or semi-rich.

I think you people overestimate yourselves too much... Or i just have too high standards...

[–]BostonPillParty 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The next time I see a fellow brown guy complain on TRP or AskTRP, I’m linking this post and telling them to shut the fuck up.

Shit isn’t easy for us, but man it feels GREAT getting your due when you bear your burden, and stoically push forward to your goal.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]JunKunX 1 points1 points [recovered]

If hardships are good, should we impose hardships on others? Should I make my son go through hardships — and if yes, to what degree?

[–]leviathan51 2 points3 points  (1 child)

The problem is, he will hate you, until he will understand you one distant day.

[–]Incendior 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fun fact, Dam Sun is a Tây Nguyên folk hero. Long story short the Sun goddess was being a bit of a bitch, so he fought her, beat her, and fucked her. Vietnamese folklore my dude. Look up Đăm Săn it you have 2 minutes to kill

[–]Liefskaap 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would agree that it does make one stronger, however lucky for getting cancer? Come on.

[–]Greedy_Flow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wtf, no one's lucky getting cancer

[–]uwey 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Some born to waste life away, but you came to fight and fight ferociously to triumph.

My admiration to you, that hope nothing stops you on your journey, bon voyage.

[–]chasethebanks 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Wow. This is amazing. Thank you for the inspiration, brother.

[–]Pragmaticpandas 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Keep getting after it man. Love that you're using your experience to inspire people.

[–]mindblower2theMAX 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Well done brother. many thanks for your inspirational message and story.

[–]liamisic911 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Had ALL myself, currently going through maintenance that shit is brutal! I’m 26 now diagnosed at 23 my whole life literally went up side down. I totally get the whole not being a victim thing, it’s like I’ve got to prove to myself I still have the power to be me again. Props to you, not many people understand that mental shift you have, its like a really long trippy experience. I’m glad its made you into a better person i’ve seen it crush people.

[–]haamrtime 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Man to man, you’re a legend. Keep going and keep us updated. You’re doing big things!

[–]andAutomator 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Inspiration story brother. Good to hear you're back. I been feeling a bit rough these past few weeks but reading your story gave me such a wake up call.

[–]Casd12 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Experiencing hardships to a point where you feel like you have nothing going for you and to overcome it is the real puberty that transforms you from a boy into a man. Very inspirational story op

[–]schlatt9 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Wow. I appreciate this story more than any other story I have read all month. Thank you for sharing

[–]Choocher97 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Wow bro I’m 97 as well definitely inspired my bumass to go make something of myself

[–]Stron2g 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You are amazing man, keep up the excellent self improvement and youll be on top of the fucking world in no time. Thank you for sharing.

[–]dinnerwithfunions 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing sir. I wish you the best.

[–]highnhorny 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Awesome work! Keep on killing it.

Can you tell me where I can find these books about manosphere, stoicism and positive masculinity?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What treatments were you on? That type of height and weight gain, especially lean weight gain is completely unheard of after 18 yrs old, especially for someone fighting cancer. That's amazing, man!

[–]mukituki123 3 points4 points  (0 children)

HOW PATHETIC CAN YOU BE? STOLE STORY FROM ELLIOTT HULSE'S CHANNEL.SOMEBODY ACTUALLY LIVED THIS AND YOU JUST STEAL IT.FOR FUCK SAKE...

[–]the_real_lunch_box 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How you have risen above this before you even had a chance, amazing. You have every right to complain yet you powered on and still beat a deadly disease too. Kudos man really.

[–]ChrimsonChin988 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m 100% positive I’ve read this story before. 1-2years ago I think. Ever posted it somewhere else OP?

Edit: I think it was on elliott hulse if I’m correct

[–]UltraPoss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am an engineer and sometimes the design process before the implementation of the solution can be very difficult, especially when the deadline is short. I have been struggling with this task since days and when i got to work, i had a discussion with a colleague of mine who showed me the uselessness of what i had set up. It goes without saying that the first thing i felt is a complete disincentive to carry on this task even though i am obliged too, as that is what i am paid for. I then opened this sub to read and forget my "painful" life, and read your story. You are a fucking winner man. Bravo. You just instantly brought me back on rails. I realized i don't have any right to complain or feel unmotivated for this kind of shitty reason. Thank you and i wish you all the best in your life, keep fighting bro'.

[–]CaciqueBoss 2 points3 points  (0 children)

this post made me realize how a little bitch I am.

thanks.

[–]Shaney96 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fuck man, shit like this gives me a nice slap of "what you complaining about pussy?" Congratulations on your growth man; continue your journey to greatness.

[–]Broder45 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This isn't a sob story. It's a motivational story about a kid that said no to giving up despite impossible odds and won.

You're incredible, man. At 21, you've had more intense life experiences and lessons than most people will throughout their lives. With your experience and mental strength, you're going to do some incredible things. Make sure to pass it on to the kids your coaching because you are going to make a lifelong impression on them. Thank you for what you're doing for them.

[–]StopCryLouding 1 points1 points [recovered]

As others in this thread pointed out, OP stole this story: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YF2R7PAqGQk

He changed a few details like years but none of this happened to OP.

[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillbanana 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Thanks for the link. This should be higher up. OP has some explaining to do.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don’t feel sorry for the “sob story” it was incredible. I wish you doing great in the future!

[–]tranquil_af 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the post, it was inspiring af. You're a badass.

[–]boy_golden1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mad respect for you, bro.

See you at the top!!

[–]skeptixon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well done man! Keep on keeping on

[–]blkMGTOW07 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This dude is a fucking winner. Great story bro.

[–]kukienboks 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How can I become an into-man too?

[–]alphapato 1 point2 points  (0 children)

For those who are lazy to read

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YF2R7PAqGQk

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This story is what being a man is all about bro

[–]Liefskaap 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I fractured my humerus back in May and I've been very down since then, lost all my muscle and can't really do much beside watch netflix. Though my fractured humerus does not at all compare to your hardships, I'm thankful for the uplifting read.

[–]ziriguidumm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your story is what I needed to read today, thank you bro!

[–]RedHoodhandles 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. When you're on the ground it is motivating to know that men have pulled themselves back up from deeper holes.

[–]Sparky159 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's always something about almost dying that always brings out the most well-rounded and goal-oriented qualities in a man

Good job OP, keep going on your path in life and you'll come out on top

[–]Work_In_Progress92 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hard times create strong men.

Powerful and inspiring.

[–]Tai1998 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Beautiful post and an amazing person, huge respect for you, hope I can someday even grasp your power of will. I have a cousin who has gone through cancer too (lynphoma as well) and it completely changed him for the worst, 5 years later it has regressed, but his personality has completely changed, i can no longer see my old cousin in there. He doesn't take pride in anything he does, he mostly does what he is told and rarely fights anyone other than his mom. Academicly he is doing preety good now having same grades as me (we are on the same university course and we are same age, althrough he started one year later but had to retake an year) and hits the gym, he looks good, but feeble, also has scars on his body. I have tried going out, having deep talks, i have tried presenting him TRP but doesn't work, most of his days are spent in home playing videogames. I wonder if you could help me out, he doesn't have friends, i have tried a lot of things, all the family weight is put on me as we are the same age and i can't help him, maybe with some of your insight having gone through cancer you could help me out.

[–]Math_Baller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great job dude. Your story is incredible and definitely gives me motivation to stay positive and work hard at all aspects of life.

[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillbanana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If it's true it's an amazing story, thanks for sharing it. Most boys don't go through 1% of the hardship you've experienced and you've come out better than 99% of them.

The manosphere and Stoicism has helped me in such a way I cant even begin to describe how thankful I am for every man that has contributed to this space.

Imagine that, a man receiving useful advice from a community of men trying to help each other. If you listen to the feminists, they'll tell you that feminism has plenty of resources for you and you don't need those misogynists in the manosphere. Imagine how much further along he'd be now if the feminists had gotten hold of him first! /s

Edit: looks like it was a fake story.

[–]DeontologicalSanders 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(cancer was fun once but would be pretty lame to experience twice)

Lol, someone get this guy a wheelbarrow for his fucking balls.

Great story.

[–]Omisla1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

what a fucking hugbox is this sub just lol

[–]HothOurYou 0 points1 point  (1 child)

How did cancer make you a foot taller? Is that a side effect? And first you said soccer but then football. Which one is it?

[–]HierEncore -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

sweet story, but off topic/wrong sub.