Red Pill TheoryThe Only Time It’s Okay To Have Oneitis (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by 1TrenGod37

When it’s yourself/your mission.

Post after post about women. Post after post about problems with women.

The problem isn’t the women. Or even your behavior towards them (well for some it is but your way of fixing it is twisted). The problem is your mission. You either don’t have one or you’re making women your mission, or you have one but it isn’t fueling you properly.

I get it women are fun and obviously sex is an important thing to us men. But you’re putting them way too high on your priority list. A lot of your “issues” would solve themselves if you spend less time focusing on this one woman, her shit tests, how to pass them, how to respond to everything she says. And focus on finding a purpose for yourself. I’m willing to bet about 75% of this sub lacks that general direction. Or if they have it, it’s something that doesn’t excite or fulfill them.

Your ONLY oneitis should be yourself and your mission.

If you even have oneitis it means you’re giving a girl too much of your time and attention.

How come you see more post about women than about finding your purpose? (“Because TRP is about sexual strategy.” Putting you’re purpose first is strategy)

We always talk about it not being about the women, most of the answers are solved when you put yourself first. So why do these issues continue to keep coming up.

Because most of you are seeking female validation, attention. You so desperately crave that, that you will go years without a reason to wake up in the morning other than to spend time with your precious snowflake. And then when she cheats on you, you come back crying on how to get her back or get over her.

Your mission.

I used to come here and post about my LTR. She used to wear the pants. I hated it. I changed a lot of my beta behaviors and turned the relationship around. But still something was missing. I was the captain of my ship but had no idea where the ship was going.

This is how you develop frame and why most of your frames are jack shit. You don’t have a baseline or direction to build your frame on. It’s much easier (actually it’s the only way) to develop a strong frame to first have a direction/mission/purpose in mind.

I didn’t have it. My frame was shit and my relationship was mediocre with a lot of issues that had me scratching my head

Then I found it. And a weird thing happened. I became so absorbed in it. I not only didn’t have time to worry about her, I barely had the time to see her. I didn’t care about anything else but setting my business up, getting it run the way I wanted to, helping the people I was dealing with, and making as much as I can. The more I got into it. The deeper in love I fell.

Not only did it give me a reason to wake up in the morning but all my other problems with my LTR vanished. She saw I didn’t spend all my time tending to her, laying around etc. that I had things to get done to support us. Thats what came first now. She became more attracted, gave me way less shit and realizes I’m very busy so the time we spend together she values a lot more. Same with a plate I have on the side. It keeps them in check. Most guys are throwing themselves at these women. Mean while they are begging to spend an hour with me.

And I’m over here not giving a fuck about anyone but my mission and sir Benjamin Franklin.

I was amazed how this changed everything for me. I thought things were going to get worst. That she was going to feel neglected. And as she does miss me a lot. Call me at the gym and ask when I’ll be home because she wants to see me. She sees the fire I have in my eyes now and it attracts the fuck out of her. Not only that she knows it comes first and over time realized there’s nothing she can say to stop me from getting my shit done.

You guys come here looking for the quick fix to your woman problems.

You can learn all these tips how to be alpha, non-needy, to “pretend you’re busy”, clever witty responses to shit test that aren’t your own, but you’re just putting a bandaid over a gun shot wound.

If you were so absorbed in your mission you wouldn’t need to pretend. You wouldn’t need to “act non-needy” you would become all those things. I know all this is in the sidebar but a lot you don’t actually absorb this. You put it off. You put on the “mission” act without having the actually thing.

You can fake it till you make it but even then you’re wasting time. Take the time and figure out what you want out of life. Find that direction. And fucking go for it.


Hustle! Try new things. Job shadow, network, work for free for a couple weekends. Figure out how to make money off your favorite hobby. Talk to people. Volunteer. Etc.

Now I’m sure some of you are going to say “trengod37 I have millions in the bank and I’m not happy and still have woman issues.”

Money and a good paying job do not equal your mission always. When I say mission I’m saying whatever it is that wakes your fucking ass up in the morning. That if you had the chance to do that. Or get your dick sucked by a HB9 there’s a good fucking chance she’s going to have to wait for that dick till X gets done, unless she can finish this in 2 minutes tops”

Will this solve all your problems? No in fact it will probably create more but you won’t care Because it fulfills you. These problems will excite you. But it will solve the stupid shit you care about when it comes to women.


You’re only oneitis should be yourself and your mission. It will solve most of your issues. But most of you won’t put in the hard work to figure out what that mission is because you desperately seek female validation. So I’m probably wasting my breathe

[–]BobbyPeru 192 points193 points  (5 children)

Your ONLY oneitis should be yourself and your mission.

Ah you tricked us. I was hoping to light you up, and you preempted me with a perfect answer.

[–]sigma272 75 points76 points  (3 children)

Instructions unclear; accidentally alpha widowed myself and am now looking for a beta provider

[–]plainposter 4 points5 points  (0 children)

eyy bebe cum gimme suk suk

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

This is the one time I actually smirked at clickbait. Well played.

[–]epicfadeout 71 points72 points  (18 children)

I really don't get why this isn't being upvoted more. It's so essential. A man without a purpose is going to be lost, if not with women then at least within himself. If you can't pin down exactly what your specific purpose or path is at this very moment, then let THAT be your purpose; a continuous quest to figure out what that thing is, what it is that moves and inspires you the most. Fucking hot women is great, but it isn't going to satisfy this thing we're talking about. You have to fill your own cup when it comes to happiness and meaning. This is so crucial, and it's totally lost on the majority of human beings.

How can you move without a goal?

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Because it’s not what they want to hear. It’s not as fun as getting validated by hot women. But to many of them it will make sense when they finally find it

[–]follow_that_rabbit 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Because TRP is about sexual strategy you BP BB cuck! (/s)

[–]0ctaviusRex 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Best post I've read in a while. I think finding your mission is the hardest part for some men including myself. I work at a 9-5 desk job, go to the gym 5x per week, have a solid social circle and my game is ok. But I want more. I want something to fulfill me and I just don't know how to figure out what it might be.

Find that direction.

How? How to enhance your mind while running in a hamsterwheel and having shit to do 24/7? What are examples of a mans mission without it being his job? How to get it all done is such short days. Human brains can only focus on 7 things at once. Mens brains consist of boxes: job box, bitches box, family box, friends box, hobby box. Maybe it is time to create a new box.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like the boxing idea, will be implemented

[–]1empatheticapathetic 37 points38 points  (30 children)

These type of posts are always completely one sided, usually from the side of a beta relationship.

There's plenty of 'Betas' out there who kill it in their job, have a mission, but have little to no experience with women. Simply having a mission doesn't cure your woman issues if you don't know how to deal with them when they do occasionally enter your world.

Plenty of incels out there who have their life priorities in order but no idea how to attract and what to expect from women.

We still need to know how attraction works, how hypergamy works, how women work and how to maximise our interactions with them aka the sidebar.

Having a mission is half of it. Understanding and practicing abundance, game, approach and working on your social life is the other half.

/u/strikethrough123 makes the other important point here. Easy to talk about how irrelevant pussy is once it's old news.

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 18 points19 points  (17 children)

See that’s where you’re misinterpret the point. Pussy is still important don’t get me wrong. Did you not read how I have an ltr and a plate? The only thing is it shouldn’t be your MAIN focus.

Some of these guys have jobs. But most of them that’s all it is. It’s not their mission. It’s not what fuels them. It just pays the bills. They’re miserable and looking to women and pussy for that happiness.

Is game important. Hypergamy. Etc? Absolutely. Is learning how to deal with women important. Absolutely.

But most guys DONT have a mission. And are more worried about that stuff than where they want to be in 10 years. I get your point and I agree. I believe we both agree on the same thing. The only difference is it being their main focus without figuring the more important stuff out first. I’m not speaking for everyone obviously.

But I guarantee you go over to the ask sub who are posting about “how do I response to this shit test” or “how to get over my oneitis.” And ask them what their day is like on a daily basis or what their vision of what they want out of life is; what their purpose is, where they want to be in 5 years. I’m willing to bet mostly all of them don’t have a single clue except

“To stick penis in hot stuff!”

[–]1empatheticapathetic 10 points11 points  (15 children)

I'll be honest bro, this entire post is exactly me for the last 2 years since i've been reading TRP. Before then i was a musician and it was my whole life; my mission. Nothing else mattered. Then i nearly got laid for the first time ever 2 years ago, and now that's all i care about (still haven't pulled it off). I really don't give a fuck about my career, where i'll be in 10 years, i just honestly truly don't give a fuck. I have some ideas what i might try and do but all i've worked on for the last two years is learning everything there is to learn on TRP, working on moving to a new city (finally here now) and finally starting to lift (for the second time, injured myself the first time and been trying to treat it since), having a good diet, building healthy habits, building new social connections and trying to undo some of the low self esteem shit i've taken on through TRP.

I have zero mission right now other than get a few legit lays on me, and then i'll stop giving a fuck about it. Nothing matters to me at all.

[–]p3n1x 2 points3 points  (11 children)

i was a musician

Lets dissect some of the verbiage. You play instruments? OR you make money making music?

Nothing matters to me at all.

Because your low self esteem hasn't been fixed yet. If you think sex will fix that, then get over any moral bullshit hang ups you have and go fuck an escort.

Stop bullshitting for your own ego before bullshitting us.

I have zero mission right now

You are currently in the "average frustrated chump" zone. Females can smell it like you slept on a pile of shit.

I don't believe you when you try to list the credentials of what you have done. We have no context, for all we know you went to the gym twice or you go there and pedal a bike for 5 minutes.

It is also possible you have made yourself a "busy idiot" and aren't able to absorb anything because you are doing more than you are capable of. Are you going through the motions or actually learning from new experiences??

[–]1empatheticapathetic 1 point2 points  (10 children)

I've been to the escort. It wasn't enough. I need to be able to attract someone into sex, then maybe I'll have enough self belief and confidence to think I can take on more important tasks and challenges and be able to complete them to any level of proficiency. But if I can't even complete such a basic task as getting laid, something my peers did over a decade ago, why do I think I'll be able to do anything worthwhile beyond that?

Edit response to your edit: I caused an injury from lifting and had to stop. You can see in my recent post history my current lifts. I've had life and family issues preventing me from living my life, but I've moved away as I mentioned, and have started working on myself. I know TRP inside and out but I'm in a new city, new job and just starting out with everything new. I don't think I'm going to have any huge confidence until I'm up and running socially and have achieved some lifts I'm proud of. I have a history of low self esteem as I'm sure you have picked up. I'm just working on myself, and I can't see any mission right now beyond getting laid.

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (9 children)

'm just working on myself

This is the mission.

Getting laid as a mission is futile. You will just get injured again or fall into Disney love with your cherry popper and get train wrecked.

My point of view is that something is missing from your story. The things you have listed, that you have done should have easily landed you a HB 5-6 lay.

Sex as a "mission" comes down to one word; DESPERATE. The anti-woman spray.

[–]1empatheticapathetic 0 points1 point  (8 children)

Getting oneitis isn't my mission, getting laid is. You seem to have mixed up the two.

The woman isn't going to know Fucking her is my main mission in life, if I'm doing it right.

I haven't got laid yet because I haven't developed enough self esteem/confidence. Any tips?

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (7 children)

Any tips?

Yeah, getting laid as a 'mission' is bad. I am not intellectual enough to go any deeper for you.

The woman isn't going to know Fucking her is my main mission in life, if I'm doing it right.

Not true. Female intuition trumps > male arrogance.

I haven't got laid yet because I haven't developed enough self esteem/confidence.

No, because you reek of Desperation. Not trying to insult, just an observation that is plain as day to another male. Imagine how obvious it is to a female.

[–]1empatheticapathetic 0 points1 point  (6 children)

What's your mission?

Currently I play and work with a number of bands. I do it purely for the social aspects now; the music side is something I'm good at but it brings me no satisfaction anymore. I've done it all before.

I lift, go to yoga, go running. Go to work. Read Reddit. Eat keto. I enjoy those things, but none are my mission.

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (5 children)

What's your mission?

I have three, based on what I believe are the only pillars that matter and are within our most control.

  1. (Health) 15% body fat (never done it before)

  2. (Happiness) Starting my own "Pen Test" Company

  3. (Family/Friends) Being there for all of my kids major events. [not as easy as it sounds]

the music side is something I'm good at but it brings me no satisfaction anymore.

Maybe teach it to someone that sucks at it. If teaching yourself is failing.

yoga, go running. Go to work. Read Reddit. Eat keto.... play and work with a number of bands.

It might not be an esteem issue, but maybe what you want from the woman?

[–]dontbethatguynow 1 points1 points [recovered]

you should take the second "a" out of your name. -Name checks out

[–]1empatheticapathetic 0 points1 point  (1 child)

wow, constructive comment bro. did you think of it yourself?

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (10 children)

These type of posts are always completely one sided.... Having a mission is half of it.

OP clearly states it is a "strategy" at the beginning of the post. OP never said it was the only strategy.

[–]1empatheticapathetic -1 points0 points  (9 children)

That clearly means he thinks it's the best strategy, hence the fact he wrote a post on it. I'm saying it's not the entire picture even though I essentially agree with his entire post.

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (8 children)

he thinks it's the best strategy

He has the right to that opinion. There is no "Best" strategy. It works for him and many others.

I'm saying it's not the entire picture

Dude, you are still debating something that was never mentioned. OP never said it was the entire picture. Get off it.

[–]1empatheticapathetic -1 points0 points  (7 children)

What did you even achieve with this comment? You raised an argument then tell me to get over it?

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (6 children)

Remove need to disagree (is it possible you misread). Objectively re-read the article. I'm not the only one telling you that you missed the message.

You raised an argument

A jumbo jet is flying over your head right now.

[–]1empatheticapathetic -1 points0 points  (5 children)

Lol my point is clear and has sufficient upvotes. I don't need clarification on anything.

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (2 children)

and has sufficient upvotes.

Don't be an incel. If you knew that every upvote was from a BP Cuck, would you brag about it?

[–]1empatheticapathetic 0 points1 point  (1 child)

True. TRP is full of NAWALTers atm.

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol, I think we finally hit common ground.

[–]BreakingRed_ 0 points1 point  (1 child)

has sufficient upvotes

Poverty validation of your ego.

[–]1empatheticapathetic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol you repeat a comment that's already been made by someone else then talk to me about ego?

[–]askmrcia 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You bring up an amazing point.

There's plenty of 'Betas' out there who kill it in their job, have a mission, but have little to no experience with women.

Yes, this is true, in fact I'll say this describes most people on the sub. Most guys here are probably engineering, computer science majors, making good grades/money yet struggling with women.

I think the real problem lies (hear me out here) is that a lot of guys here felt they missed out on ages 16-25. Those ages guys tend to be hitting the books and working on themselves. It was also those ages where I bet a lot of kids missed out on all the high school, college social life and women.

Now they are age 26+ with decent jobs, good education, and all that shit, but still struggle with women.

So yes to your point, a good job, hobbies, "mission" (in quotes for a reason) and all of that shit don't mean much to a lot of guys because women are what they want and what they feel they missed out on.

My entire point in all of this is, this post is good for guys who had their sex, LTRs and all that shit already, but for guys who hasn't experienced that yet, it is their mission. Whether OP wants to call it putting women on a pedestal or whatever, it is what it is.

[–]saltyCounselor 6 points7 points  (1 child)

You guys come here looking for the quick fix to your woman problems. You can learn all these tips how to be alpha, non-needy, to “pretend you’re busy”, clever witty responses to shit test that aren’t your own, but you’re just putting a bandaid over a gun shot wound.

This. A lot of people here doesn't realize imo, that going TRP road is a marathon, not a sprint.

Blue pill is the definition of stagnation - aka 'love yourself the way you are', thus guys believe that suddenly knowing the truth and learning a few pickup lines will make it 100 times easier.

What they don't realize though is that Red Pill is a complete opposite - 'Become the best version of yourself, make yourself (and others) love you'

And that is of no easy task. Some are lacking goals in life, like you pointed out, while others are encaged in the fake principles of manners and selfishlessness aka nice guy syndrome.

[–]1UPZ_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I truly believe that every men or women should work on improving themselves, physically, intellectually, spirutally and mentally... no time?... then make time. Just be the best you can be.

What irks me is that a lot of guys, especially really young guys here wants a quick fix so they can become "alpha"... lol. When in fact, they actually just want to be attractive to females. Well, being good looking, happy and fit... are good enough traits to win attention from females. Good enough for the young ones here... and of course making women think and perceive you as something else (manipulation) can help... as a key aspect of the TRP. But usually, if you are being the best you can be and practical to be with... someone will find you appealing naturally without manipulation techniques.

but there are men... yes.. men .... Who wants a LTR with a woman and thats where a lot of knowledge or hypothesis form the TRP approach can come handy, as it helps teach you how women differ from men in regards to how they think, their desires and what makes them tick.

My view, developed through the years seeing it out there and being part of it even before the TRP became a theology here... be the best you can be, look after your body, mind and soul, find something you are passionate about, make yourself useful and dependable.... and you can/will appeal to other people, including women. And don't be a naive... always try to see it from another's perspective to gauge feelings, thoughts, opinions etc.

And don't be a slave to your penis...

[–]strikethrough123 17 points18 points  (4 children)

I'm sure that after I've had my fill of women I'll be posting the same thing in a couple of years. You need to understand that the majority of people that flock to this sub are desperate incels (like I once was) that crave a whiff of pussy and no matter how much "Your mission" shit you attempt to shove down their throats it won't be enough to satisfy what they desire most. Even after experiencing a fair share of sexual experiences, I'm always looking for the next one, however, sex isn't as important as it once was. I truly believe that in order for one to be completely devoted to their mission, they need to have very little distractions, and an unquenched thirst for women is definitely a distraction.

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 15 points16 points  (2 children)

I get through your early years in life you’re not going to know your mission from a hole in your ass. But there are still guys in their 30s living at home. who completely are pushing this thing off. And really don’t understand its importance. They claim they want to be this and be that but the solution that lies in front of them remained untouched

[–]strikethrough123 8 points9 points  (1 child)

I completely agree with your point that one's mission should be his priority. However, even a dude in his 30's or even late 20's living at home deprived of sex, women will be at the forefront of his mind. The only way around this without giving up is to experience abundance, and the tools and information available in TRP can help one attain that abundance. If having a mission will bring women in, then they will develop a mission, only after they've got the sex will they realize the futility of chasing after women.

[–]p3n1x 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The only way around this without giving up

Is to get the fuck out of your parents home, period. That should be your MISSION. Then your MISSION will change again when you are wiping your own ass.

Saying "sex" must happen first before all else is Hamster bullshit. A woman won't let you suck on their tits when you still have your mothers in your mouth.

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (0 children)

shit you attempt to shove down their throats it won't be enough to satisfy what they desire most.

Those Beta bitches are entitled to nothing. Boo Hoo their Disneyland wishes aren't being "satisfied".

I truly believe that in order for one to be completely devoted to their mission, they need to have very little distractions,

No, what you need to be is a MAN. If you are distracted easily, you are a child. The "mission" is the distraction.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Refreshing post. After finding the red pill and reading Tomassi I have no interest in skirt chasing every day. I wish we talked about mission and purpose more often.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (3 children)

I really don't understand the appeal of fucking as many women as you can till your 30-35 anyway. In our degenerate sex culture infected by Marxism where 80+% of women are sluts or borderline sluts who are absolutely not wife material, why not settle down with a good woman if you find one at a young age who is loyal, smart, attractive, and has not been with a lot of men?

I mean if you have a healthy sexual relationship with this girl who is your "co-captain", strokes your ego, supports your goals and life purpose, etc., is that not the ideal of every man? And you can still apply TRP by running dread game and competition anxiety to keep her on her toes; always having plan B in case you split; not putting her on a pedestal (oneitis); all that good shit

Just use common sense and don't marry this girl until you are absolutely sure she is wife material (like 5 years dating minimum with no red flags) and you have experienced a lot of things, travelled, etc.

Anybody else think this way?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

why not settle down with a good woman if you find one at a young age who is loyal, smart, attractive, and has not been with a lot of men?


What you’re describing is basically a unicorn.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I mean obviously the standards can be compromised. No woman is going to be perfect what I mean to describe is a woman that is mostly like this. Loyalty and intelligence is preferable to me as long as she's not ugly. Or if she was loyal and attractive but not exactly intelligent or stupid, I could live with that. Know what I'm saying?

[–]1SirKolbath 1 point2 points  (0 children)

u/RSQ7 has a valid point, but I think we might be looking at this too quickly.

Yeah, that low n-count, stimulating HB9 might be damn hard to find, but shouldn't that be the point? Even a beta can land most modern women with a small amount of work. If you really want to be one of the top one percent, shouldn't "unicorn slayer" be on your business card?

This is food for thought. Pussy is nice, but every woman has one. Finding that unicorn is a much more challenging role.

[–]GutShot9 1 points1 points [recovered]

I have had this same realisation over the past year. I know the reason I get one-itis is because I don't really have anything important going on with my life. I have been soul searching for a while now on what my purpose in life is and what I want to throw myself %100 into but all I'm getting are blanks. I need a post about that.

[–]MilkMoney111 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you need a good 'ole fashion depression to sink into. I usually find my calling, or an epiphany, whatever, during really trying times when I'm questioning if I can make it through. It slaps me in the face and just like that I have a drive to do something and dedicate all my time to pursue.

5 years ago around this time I was in the Navy, had lost a really good friend, and gotten out of a relationship with my oneitis. I was leaving the military and unsure where to take my life. I was depressed because my best friend had passed, my girlfriend was a slut, and I had no idea what the fuck I was going to do when I became a civilian again. I told myself to get over myself and focus on making the world a better place in some way or another, and to forget about everything else. I just wanted something I could do for others so I could lay on my death bed satisfied that I improved something or someone. Here I am today in graduate school getting my doctorate. Never in my life would I see myself as a Doctor until I had that revelation.

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (3 children)

but all I'm getting are blanks.

This could be a chemical issue. You sound like a pot head (not saying you are one, sound like one). Also, your testosterone may be low.

[–]GutShot9 1 points1 points [recovered]

Thanks for the concern, I've never had someone tell me I sound like a pot head before! I smoke here and there if someone offers me some, but I don't go out of my way to get it.

I'm not exactly doing bad with my life, I just haven't found my purpose and believe me, I've been trying. I quit my decent paying job in the oil industry almost 2 years ago to travel. I spent 5.5 months in Europe and 7 months in South America. I came back home 2 months ago but I'm planning to go back to South America in January to see the countries I missed (and go back to Colombia <3) and because I want to miss one more winter before I go hard at work again. Maybe I've been hanging around with too many free spirits, I'm giving off a pot head vibe.

As for low T, it's possible but I don't think so. I lift heavy 3 times a week, and was going to the gym pretty consistently for a good portion of my travels. I actually gained quite a bit of muscle.

I have put a lot of brain power towards finding my purpose, I even tried ayahuasca, but I haven't found something where I just know "this is my path!". I know I can be successful in whatever I put myself into. I'm smart, capable and self-reliant. The problem I have is that I don't want to throw myself into something I'm not passionate about. I did that with my oil career already.

I'm into my early 30's now, and the older I get the more I realise that time is the most valuable thing, I don't waste it for nobody. For me to go back to school for 2-4 years or to start a new career from the entry-level means sacrificing a lot of time and energy, I want to make damn sure it is what I want.

I have realised more about what I don't want to do than what I do want to do over the last few years. It helps to eliminate choices but like I've said, I haven't found it.

[–]p3n1x 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I smoke here and there ... Quit job to travel... hanging around with too many free spirits,... tried ayahuasca

You, are, the, free, spirit. Forget blaming who you spend time with.

I want to make damn sure it is what I want.

If you are so capable of success in anything, stop the conservative BS. It is an excuse to sit still and "ponder" possibilities.

giving off a pot head vibe.

Both your listed actions and words are giving off a "depressed" vibe. Did you play any contact sports?

[–]bearlakeburton 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank fucking god I was going to post something about this. I hate this threads obsession with women. Life has a lot more to it than just fucking girls. Chasing girls is as much of a waste of time as anything else if it's not improving you it's not improving you. Everyone should waste some of their time on things that they enjoy this keeps you happy but spending 80% of your energy on women even if it's highly successful is the same as spending 80% of your time on weed and it doesn't get you anywhere. Build your Empire and they will come.

[–]sunbro29 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Agreed. That obsession, that singular focus, should be directed 100% at a goal. Whether it be a career, a productive hobby, or passion; it should never be at another person.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

At 18/19 years old , I used to care about having sex on the regular but now i don’t think too much about it . Of course I want to get laid and there are several times where I WANT TO shoot my shot but at the age of 21 , it’s not the right time YET to do so . I’m attending CC and expect to graduate in May . I just strive to be successful in life , no matter what it may be . I do not want to be in the same place my parents are currently in , which is poor. I WANT TO BE ABLE TO PROVIDE FOR MYSELF AND MY siblings . INDEPENDENT LIKE A MF . Your post is a wake up call if some of us haven’t done so yet . Great thread

[–]biglaughingcock 6 points7 points  (1 child)

your SMV at 18-19 is low, hell it doesn't even shoot up until past 25. men have to play the long game. we climb the wall for decades while women get it all until the wall arrives.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Is that from experience or from observation ? I will admit the girls I’ve been with on average look like a 5 or 6 but some of the sex was pretty fucking GREAT . I would think after 20 , girls will notice you’re not the young guy around campus . Girls like older dudes and shit

[–]AaronRolls 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The only post a man needs. Thank you.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Quality post, this should be sidebar material. I used to have oneitis or at least focusing on one girl at a time way too much, so that every argument was a distraction that ruined my mood and affected me way too much.

I also found immense peace in pulling away and refocusing on my own goals, my business, and my interests like fitness/bodybuilding, cars, music. The DGAF mentality is so easier to understand when girls are just another distraction competing for your time against all the other things you have in your life that you know already make you happy.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Fuck TrenGod man. I keep clicking on specific posts that are so relevant to me, then I get to the bottom and its you everytime lol. You post some gold

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (8 children)

Oneitis sucks, a girl doesn't even have to be that attractive and I will still develop oneitis for her

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 1 point2 points  (7 children)

You lack abundance.

Oh and exactly what this post is talking about. If you were focused on your mission. You wouldn’t have time to sit and obsess over her

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (6 children)

You are right I have lack of options since I dont get out much so a 5/10 looks like a 10/10 to me.

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children)

What’s your purpose in life

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

After a long day of thought I will focus on self improvement

[–]Finance92 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do it with a purpose. Ask yourself why you are doing it and keep tracking your progress. Accept your mistakes, learn from them and do it better next time. Good luck!

[–]imbeciI 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Are you lifting? To me, after a good day at the gym my mind is clear enough to meditate peacefully.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I need to read this multiple times, and process. I have some kind on oneitis for the woman who showed me the light of TRP. Which is a huge gift!

Im starting the change, the potential should not be wasted.

[–]tibikush2012 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is why it's very important for men to pass a period in which they focus on ONS.. After you fuck a lot of pussy, unless you are mentally not normal, you won't crave it as much as before and also you would never ask yourself in the future on what you missed.

Every man should have a phase in which he focuses on fucking. Same goes for oneitis. Once you pass a heartbrake, you will never pass another again. My father calls it "the rite of passage into manhood"

[–]WholesomeAwesome 0 points1 point  (1 child)

If you need a mission, I'll give you 10 for you to choose from. just msg me

[–]ThickDickWarrior89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Tg what do you do for work? Personal trainer?

[–]Platinumb2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When you are pursuing your mission a few things will happen.. You'll gain self-confidence, happiness, struggle, self-esteem, growth.. all sorts of shit. These are the things that women are attracted to. If you're just pursuing a mission for the sake of getting girls, it's not going to work. Fake does not fucking work. Get something your passionate about.. I don't care if you have a passion for sculpting dildos, if that's your passion go fucking do it. If you need validation from women, you are needy, if you need validation from your friends, you are needy. The only validation you need is from yourself.

[–]postreformedpua 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a nice idea but not everyone is going to be able to make their hobby their money earner. I agree though there should be a lot more going on in your life than just work and women.

[–]productivize 1 points1 points [recovered]

Does anyone have any recommendations on books about finding your purpose?

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t have any books. I don’t think a book can tell you that although there may be some to help guide you that other members have read. For me it was just trying new things. New jobs. Trial and error

[–]epicfadeout 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Way of the Superior Man by David Deida contains some great writing on the subject. I'd start there.

[–]Rock2live1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

However long finding your missing will take... Whatever that mission is... However long will it take for you to accomplish that mission... I don't know but keep pursuing what you love. This is truly what a man needs in his life. Sex is great. But it doesn't even come close to the sense of adventure, excitement, and adrenaline of pursuing your ambition. OP, thanks for the post.

[–]Novodad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I HIGHLY recommend to read the book ‘Alpha Male 2.0’ by Caleb Jones.

Essentially the mantra of the book encapsulates the ideology that the most important thing in a man’s life is achieving happiness through his mission. After you identify your mission, everything sort of falls into place.

He has an excellent exercise in there to discover your mission, in congruence with identifying your core values (the framework to your mission), as well as goals.

I’ve been a longtime lurker of TRP (3+ years). This is my first comment and I genuinely can not recommend this book enough.

[–]aaaasssaaa11 0 points1 point  (7 children)

The only oneitis is the mother of your kids. Oh. One more oneitis. Your daughter.

I guess all the 15yo alphas will downvote this. But anyway, believe me kids, when people have kids rules change

[–]dontbethatguynow 1 points1 points [recovered]

What if that mother of your kids doesn't let you see your kids, took half your shit, and takes 30% of your paycheck everyone month. I've heard that happens.

[–]aaaasssaaa11 -1 points0 points  (4 children)

Then you are a retard who made a child with a bitch. Well not you but a man in this situation. There's no way that true bitch nature came out of nowhere

[–]dontbethatguynow 1 points1 points [recovered]

Yeah i haven't made that mistake yet, but doens't this go against AWALT?

[–]aaaasssaaa11 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Well, it actually does. I like this sub but i think that overgeneralization is never good. There are a lot of different women out there. And like all 4000000000 of women are like this? I aren't think that

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You don't understand oneitis.

[–]notonlyplace -3 points-2 points  (3 children)

The problem isn’t the women.

Yes it is

. Or even your behavior towards them

Yes it is

You either don’t have one or you’re making women your mission, or you have one but it isn’t fueling you properly.

Holy shit, this solves every rich beta's issues. If you have game it helps if you lack game and don't know how to pass shit test, welcome to divorce rape

But it will solve the stupid shit you care about when it comes to women.

No it won't, In fact, it could make it worst. This entire blue pill philosophy of not learning about women but learning about something else is only designed to keep you from the truth and light.

I was a highly successful beta, not much of a pushover would only talk to women on the weekends because I was to busy, and yet after I had a friend spit some red pill to me, I was getting laid the next day.

, most of the answers are solved when you put yourself first.

Yes this is how I pass every math class I put myself first, I didn't study any books, I didn't learn or memorize formula's I simply put myself first and focus on my mission than everything resolved itself

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 3 points4 points  (2 children)

And over your head it goes

[–]RedPimpin 1 points1 points [recovered]

oneitis is being in love and focused on one girl and ONE girl in particular, im tired of guys trying to twist the words to sound clever

it is NEVER ok to have oneitis, no matter how you twist it or flip it

[–]1TrenGod37[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Relax cupcake it was meant to get a point across don’t take it so literal.