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Field ReportDirty Sheets (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by Senior ContributorRedPope

TL;DR: Some people can never get enough.

I spent a wonderful three day weekend with my girlfriend of five months. We've been monogamous since March. I'm in my early 40s, divorced dad. She is a 33 year old career girl, no kids, never married. We're both attractive, physically fit, and have very high sex drives.

We spent most the weekend at my place. We had sex three times on Friday, four on Saturday, and twice more on Sunday. She orgasms quickly and repeatedly. She comes so often that one orgasm will blur into the next. Impossible to count how many times I got her off.

The weather was perfect. In between lovemaking, we ate great meals, watched some Netflix, spent our afternoons laying by the pool, and nights soaking in the hot tub. It was an amazingly relaxing weekend that we both needed. She had a great time. Sunday evening, she snuggled up close. "This weekend has been so perfect, I don't want it to end!" But we both had to work in the morning, so eventually she had to head home.

All day Monday, she sent me text after text. Sweet and sexual. Very flirtatious. "When will I see you again?" I replied that I had to get caught up on stuff, but I might be able to stop by for a short visit tomorrow after work. "Perfect! I need more of you!"

I spent Monday night doing housework and other chores. I had an empty fridge, dirty dishes and laundry from the weekend. She texted me steadily throughout the night. Same all day Tuesday. "I can't wait to see you!"

I left the office and arrived at her house right as she was pulling in the drive. She walked over and greeted me with a passionate kiss on the sidewalk. We went inside.

We talked for a few minutes and I fixed us a couple drinks. She excused herself to use the restroom. I needed to pee too. Rather than wait for her, I chose to use the toilet in the master bath upstairs. I carried the drinks to her bedroom. I had limited time, and we'd be heading there soon anyway. I walk by her bed and immediately notice a dried cum stain in the center of the sheets.

What the fuck?

I haven't been here in a week.

Holy shit.

I go take a piss. Thoughts are racing through my head. What should I do? Should I call her out? Demand an explanation? Or just quietly leave? One thing is certain: I'm done with her. She cheated. It is over.

When I come out, she's pulling the sheets off the bed. Very nonchalantly, she says, "The cat was on the bed, let me change the sheets. She's shedding like crazy."

Equally emotionless, I comment that with the warmer weather, she needs to brush the cat more often. I help her put on the new sheets, and we immediately start having sex. Afterwards she snuggles up to me.

She purrs in my ear. "You've been fucking me so much, I've been raw for days." She claims she has been unable to focus at work, thinking of me so often.

I give her a squeeze, then remind her I need to take off. We dress and she walks me out. One last kiss in the door and I drive away.

She texts me later that night. I do not reply.

The next day, she texts me: "Good morning, sexy!" A few more texts follow, roughly one per hour. I don't answer any of them. Around lunchtime she asks, "Is everything OK?" I tell her we'll talk after work.

I call her up. She asks if I'm upset. I calmly respond, "Of course. You slept with some other guy." She denies it. I tell her I saw the sheet. She goes quiet, then tries to claim it was me, from the previous week. I tell her to stop lying.

I maintained an emotionless and calm tone throughout the entire conversation. I'll spare you the drawn out trickle truth. It took 10 minutes to get the full story. There wasn't much to it:

After our long weekend of sex, while texting me all day and night Monday, she had also messaged a friend to buy $20 worth of weed. They smoked a bowl and had sex. The end.

I've met this guy. Hell, I've bought weed from him too. He's the stereotypical loser pothead. Nice enough guy, but he's pudgy, and has no ambition. An out of shape nobody with a dead-end job. But she was horny and he was there. Her pussy was raw and swollen. She wanted dick. He had dick.

"I don't even like him!" she protested. "It didn't mean anything. I wanted you, but you weren't there!"

I told her we were done. She was a free woman and could do what she liked, but I wasn't going to see her again. She cried and begged forgiveness. I calmly said good night and hung up.

She called me back, I didn't answer. She texted me, begging to talk. I blocked her number. Removed her from Facebook. Deleted her from my phone. Two days later, a mutual friend (more hers than mine) asked what happened. I simply told her we parted amicably. We had moved on.

It's been two weeks now with no further contact. There's very little overlap in our social circles. We're both career-minded professionals. I don't expect any stupidity.

Some of you may be wondering why I chose to fuck her that final time. Mere minutes after removing the cum stained sheet from a bed where she had fucked some other guy maybe 20 hours prior. Why didn't I lose my shit and call her a whore? Don't I have any masculine pride? Sure. But I just didn't care. In the time it took me to take a piss, I had already written her off. This was one final bang with an ex. She just didn't know she was my "ex" yet.

Lessons learned: Nothing I didn't already know. Pure TRP fundamentals.

Good sex is not enough to make a woman faithful. They have free and unlimited access to dick. If she wants it, she can get it. She was horny for me, but I wasn't there.

I gave her commitment and emotional validation as well. It still wasn't enough. She's an older woman (33) with many past sexual partners. While she may have loved the way I made her feel, sexually and emotionally, both have far less value with experienced woman. The more partners a woman has had, the weaker the pair bonding. Even my best was not enough to maintain her loyalty.

Did you notice the unspoken implication? It was my fault she cheated. She wanted me, but I wasn't there. Clearly, I screwed up by not being available to bang her a fourth day in a row... ;) It is never their fault.

When you break up with a girl, do it calmly and without emotion. Don't make a scene. Don't give her drama as a parting gift. They crave that emotional climax. A big finale. Don't sacrifice your frame/dignity just so she can have her closure.

Know what you want. I was not in love. I was never looking for a LTR. I don't have time to spin plates, so I prefer short-term relationships. All I ever wanted was 6 months of companionship and good sex. I'm not going to cry because I only got 5. She was my spring fling, nothing more. Spring is over and she is gone. Time to find her replacement.

Some women hit the Wall softly. Even at 33, she's still fit and attractive. She'll find another guy. Probably quicker than I'll find the next girl. Doesn't matter, it isn't a competition. Maybe she'll land a BB husband. Or maybe she'll end up alone with her cat. I don't care either way. This is the way of the world. No point getting upset. It is what it is.


[–]Dzuari 228 points228 points [recovered]

It's interesting to watch the correlation between the tone of a post and the OP's age. It seems the older a poster is, the less vitriol he will have when things like this happened and it just becomes, "seen it once, seen it a thousand times. Oh well."

Sets a good example on how to strive for a perfect and unbreakable frame.

[–]SexistFlyingPig 70 points71 points  (2 children)

It's not anger, but it's disappointment. That's a lot better than anger.

[–]krakosia 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think there has to be a stage past disappointment since this is really expected behavior, an inevitability.

[–]1Ronin11A 34 points35 points  (2 children)

Agreed. It's refreshing. The bitter-phase "ALL WOMEN ARE WHORES" vitriol grows tiresome.

[–]Red-Zen 16 points16 points [recovered]

All women are whores. But that's just how it is. "seen it once, seen it a thousand times. Oh well."

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (13 children)

I think he should have still just used her for sex and then let go after finding a replacement.

[–]Senior ContributorRedPope[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I'm not cut out for branch swinging. I don't think most men are. Better to have that clean break.

[–]ballotechnic 10 points11 points  (11 children)

But she seemed to have sex rather indiscriminately so would it be worth the risk?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (10 children)

Whats the difference between that and an escort? Which tons of men use. Every woman is a risk. Whats the alternative? No sex? Only "virgins"? No matter how sane and normal she seems you have no idea whats happening when you arent around. And any woman has access to unlimited sexual options. Theres no guaranteed way to mitigate sexual risks. Other than not having any.

[–]ballotechnic 4 points5 points  (9 children)

Some folks don't use escorts,no judgment against those who do, but you go into it knowing what risks you're taking. Sure, you can't be 100% sure but there are plenty of monogamous sexual relationships out there were you won't have as great a risk. It's certainly less of a risk than a woman whose so horny she'll blow off her boyfriend's trust just for a quickie. Not to mention have so little regard for him that she doesn't even bother to clean up the evidence in a timely manner.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (8 children)

I really doubt most women are totally monogamous. Id expect they have at least a fling every six months. Id guess thats about average. Only men are not primarily concerned with their needs.

[–]ballotechnic 1 point2 points  (7 children)

In a relationship I think most stay monogamous if they agree to it. Do some cheat, sure, but not most. Now if the relationship is open that a different things, but judging from the OP's reaction that was not the case.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (6 children)

I dont think so. Why should they. Staying monogamous is a rational decision. Women are not rational so why should they behave so just about sex? The simplest answer is, they dont. Sex to women is transactional. This is not in dispute.

[–]ballotechnic 1 point2 points  (5 children)

That's a pretty broad, course brush you're using there.Perhaps in your experience this is the case. In mine, it's not.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Maybe its the case and you never knew about it. Thats kinda the theme of RP, all the things we thought we knew about women and didnt. Sadly I think a man will do better with women by believing the worst and hopefully being proven wrong. Believing the best makes you a beta.

[–]redpillsoldato 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This. I always take note of how the older posters have a better sense of stoicism. It lets me know that despite it being fucked up, these type of things are frequent enough to be seen as natural, and nothing to lose your balls over.

[–]Endorsed ContributorVarrian 219 points220 points  (13 children)

This is how it should be done: ice fucking cold.

What most men don't realize is that the more you throw your toys out the box the more value you lose in her eyes. This makes it easier for her to rationalize that you were shitty all along and that she deserves better.

Well played, bro, well played.

[–]2IVIaskerade 175 points176 points  (4 children)

Playing it icy is also more likely to make her flip her shit, discrediting her in the eyes of your friendship groups and undermining her attempts to sabotage your relationships with them.

Like a climber facing a smooth, sheer, face, a woman seeks to make her own handholds by chipping into the hard exterior. If she can't do this, she can't climb.

Women know emotion. Women can deal with emotion. They can't deal with a complete lack of it.

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed 69 points70 points  (1 child)

Like a climber facing a smooth, sheer, face, a woman seeks to make her own handholds by chipping into the hard exterior. If she can't do this, she can't climb.

I'm stealing this analogy. Please accept an upvote as payment.

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Like a climber facing a smooth, sheer, face, a woman seeks to make her own handholds by chipping into the hard exterior. If she can't do this, she can't climb.

We often have analogies for frame, but not on how people attack it. People, especially women will try to sabotage your frame enough so they can get their claws in and switch it back on to themselves. You must be solid as a rock at all times so people cant get a grip on it.

Excellent

[–]__ZEAL__ 29 points30 points  (5 children)

"What's cooler than being cool? ICE COLD"

Man I haven't heard that song in a while. It's oddly relevant as well. Regardless I find it hilarious that one of my favourite songs from growing up is so Red Pill.

[–]Ripsaw1990 16 points17 points  (2 children)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWgvGjAhvIw Had to listen to it, found something that I missed before. He says,"You think you've you got it, oh you think you've got it but 'got it' just don't get it til there's nothing at all". Your girl is not a special snowflake, AWALT.

[–]29-M-LA 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I think its one of the greatest written songs. Here's a good analysis of it

https://borismakesart.wordpress.com/2010/02/10/analysis-of-outkasts-hey-ya-one-of-500-best-songs-of-all-time/

Tldr: love isn't really what we were taught it was.. but you don't care cause you're gonna keep dancing either way.

[–]Ripsaw1990 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, was good read. Best Tldr I've ever seen, so poetic and insightful especially if I'm right that you mean 'dancing' to have a double meaning for fucking like in other pop songs ;)

[–]Dude219 0 points1 point  (0 children)

deleted What is this?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't even think OP was Ice Cold, he was the same temperature the whole way through. He literally had a moment while he was taking a piss, then no longer gave a fuck.

[–]Endorsed ContributorScholarInRed 382 points383 points  (28 children)

Some of you may be wondering why I chose to fuck her that final time. Mere minutes after removing the cum stained sheet from a bed where she had fucked some other guy maybe 20 hours prior. Why didn't I lose my shit and call her a whore? Don't I have any masculine pride? Sure. But I just didn't care. In the time it took me to take a piss, I had already written her off. This was one final bang with an ex. She just didn't know she was my "ex" yet.

This here is a man who has utterly mastered abundance mentality. Newcomers take note.

This is the most solid FR I've seen in quite a while.

[–][deleted] 172 points173 points  (6 children)

Alpha...goes ahead and takes the sex as planned. Decides to not waste more of his precious time on this one slut.

Beta.....has no sex, throws tantrum "how could you do this to MEEE? And then gets trickled truth into forgiving her

[–]BlackHeart89 15 points16 points  (5 children)

Beta.....has no sex, throws tantrum "how could you do this to MEEE? And then gets trickled truth into forgiving her

Yeah man. Even while reading this, I don't think I would have been able to write her off so easily. Then again, I wouldn't recognize a cum stain on a bed if I saw it unless it was still some white in it. But if I was sure it was cum, I would have had the same resolve.

[–]billsmashole 12 points13 points  (3 children)

The stain in an odd spot that looks fresh and she's really anxious to change the sheets. All the evidence you need.

[–]BlackHeart89 7 points8 points  (2 children)

True. Not to mention she started trying to explain the stain without directly mentioning it or OP even bringing it to her attention.

[–]1KyfhoMyoba 0 points1 point  (1 child)

she started trying to explain the stain

She wasn't trying to explain the stain, in fact, she wanted to avoid drawing attention to it at all - that's why she made up the (obviously false) story of her cat shedding. She wanted to remove the evidence as quickly as possible.

[–]BlackHeart89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ohhh ok. I took it as her trying to indirectly explain it before you could ask. To me, her method brought more attention to it.

[–]lugubriusTRP 6 points7 points  (0 children)

it's kinda obvious, like a liquid spillage that never disappears even when not wet.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorCopperFox3c 71 points72 points  (0 children)

This really drives at the heart of abundance mentality is not about the number of plates you're spinning ... it is about your mindset toward each individual plate.

Doesn't matter if you are spinning 1 plate or a hundred. Same mindset.

[–]1xwm 45 points46 points  (2 children)

Hell. Old comers take note. This is poetry.

[–]87GNX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is Aesop's Red Pill Fables material.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (1 child)

"Some women hit the Wall softly. Even at 33, she's still fit and attractive. She'll find another guy. Probably quicker than I'll find the next girl. Doesn't matter, it isn't a competition. Maybe she'll land a BB husband. Or maybe she'll end up alone with her cat. I don't care either way. This is the way of the world. No point getting upset. It is what it is."

This is the part that needs to be highlighted and saved. Let go. Stop getting so worked up over shit women do. Women have the freedom of choice and it's not going anywhere. They've been unleashed from their metaphorical cages and they're never going back. Stop hoping and praying for some magical change. This is who women have and will always be deep down.

Protect yourself. Get the prenup. Wear a condom. Always improve. Never get fat. Never stop aiming for better. Everything else, women especially, are out of your control.

[–]1ThumpNuts 36 points37 points  (8 children)

This is even beyond me. I give "mad props" to OP for being this cool.

I could not resist the urge to end it on the spot and scold her for it. Not that I would lose my cool and whine or flip my shit. I would be brutally cold about it... robotic. It would be completely ego driven and I can't even tell you why. In the end it serves no purpose and I would have turned down an opportunity to get laid.

OP is a better man than I am.

[–]Kiwikeeper 34 points35 points  (1 child)

This is why I love being a part of this subreddit. There are people who are not afraid to admit that They lack in something. Because if you are on the path of improvement, What you lack is simply What you don't have yet.

[–]yumyumgivemesome 4 points5 points  (4 children)

I very likely would have reacted the same as you. In fact, I have. Fortunately, I have also used a similar situation to practice my videotaping skills so I have some lasting memories of the good times.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children)

"I have to return some video tapes"

[–]Iupvoteforknowledge 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Ahh tip of my tongue, what is this from?

[–]Anon_216 3 points4 points  (0 children)

American Psycho. His alibi for everything.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's because in your lizard brain you've recognized when another man has been sowing his wild oats in your field. You don't want to reap what another man has sown so biologically when you find a woman has been cheating on you your first instinct is to dump them.

[–]yumyumgivemesome 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Having abundance mentality when he is too busy to spin plates requires zen-like mastery. I've been spinning for well over a year, and my stomach still hurts when I lose one on her circumstances rather than mine. Reminds me I still have a long way to go.

[–]FrameWalker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am embarrassed about how butt hurt I had been in the past. It's a lot easier to accept and let go after 1) having increasingly hotter plates and 2) being with some next level sluts. Seeing how many cocks girls ride is a boner killer. I had a Ons with a cc super trooper and it's made it very hard to become attached. I know the potential for girls to hop decks. I've seen it and felt it.

There are many paths to abundance. The key is to value yourself over any and all pussy to the deepest level. You get there by increasing your sense of self value, decreasing the scarcity of pussy and decreasing the value of any given pussy.

[–]redsuedeshoes25 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It's a beautiful thing when you're able to remove all emotion from a situation such as this and do what you know needs to be done without a second thought. Hard to get over on a man with this level of abundance mentality!

[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 122 points123 points  (26 children)

Back in University I had this friend Tim. Anyway his older brother told him about a sketch ass Russian Dating site called Znakomstva.Ru. This is 2009 way before online dating is popular.

So 19 year old Tim finds a 40 year old woman on the site. She invites him over to her beach side mansion. Opens the door naked and drunk. Fucks him and makes him leave before her husband gets home.

Two days later Tim is showing me pixilated vagina pictures on his flip phone at the university dining hall. That was the beginning of my Red Pill awakening. Older women are no more respectable than younger women.

[–]MoneyStatusLooks 55 points55 points [recovered]

Older women are no more respectable than younger women.

Definitely this. The more dicks that have been in a chick, the less she will pair bond with you and the less she will value you.

Every single psychotic, psychologically fucked up chick I have met has been a carousel rider. Every chick that I have seen as LTR potential has had a good upbringing and had a low partner count (usually young as well).

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (11 children)

Both my current and previous girlfriend were virgins when I met them due to their religious upbringing. 19 and 22, I'm 30. Combined, that's 1 year of dating and fucking someone who has never had sex with anyone else. The pair bond is strong and I'm not looking forward to going back to normal modern women after this relationship ends.

[–]MoneyStatusLooks 8 points8 points [recovered]

then don't end it? You know you are allowed to be happy right!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

They end, bro. I'm also in LTR who was a 19 yo virgin when we met 3 years ago. No way she won't want another dick sooner or later. Also it's not like I would mind a 19 yo again.

[–]The_Americano 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Knowing that your relationships is going to end is a great way to go about life. Abundance mentality at its best.

[–]zombig 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not looking forward to going back to normal modern women after this relationship ends.

I'm in the same boat, there is such a huge difference between zero and one. I can't even wrap my head around how can one LTR a non-virgin girl.

[–]Ohmyqueef -4 points-3 points  (2 children)

Come to Israel, we still got beautiful virgin women

[–]Jigsus 0 points1 point  (5 children)

LTR potential has had a good upbringing and had a low partner count

What do you consider a low partner count?

[–]MoneyStatusLooks 1 points1 points [recovered]

Both my ex and my current favourite plate had 3 partners and were both 22 when I met them. I don't know what to consider low, anything above 10 is definitely high and not worthy of commitment.

[–]Jigsus 0 points1 point  (3 children)

[–]1R_Model_07 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I wonder how they get this kind of data. Not that I don't believe it, but more that I can't imagine women owning up to it.

[–]Jigsus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe they do own up to it at the gynecologist

[–]TomDemian 8 points8 points [recovered]

So 19 year old Tim finds a 40 year old woman on the site.

I guarantee if you posted this story as someone other than GayLubeOil, and if you posted this story as if it happened to you, there would be replies about "the wall".

This is just something I've noticed on TRP. Lots of people consider every women post-30 or sometimes even 25 to have "hit the wall". They advise not fucking women who have hit the wall.

Meanwhile, in the real world, your friend fucked a 40 year old and had a good time.

[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Dude my friend Tim was a scavenger. We used to call him Tim the Racoon because he did not give a fuck.

[–]1kingofpoplives 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Meanwhile, in the real world, your friend fucked a 40 year old and had a good time.

Plenty of women stay attractive and very fuckable well past 30...but a lot of them fall off a cliff as well.

The wall is extremely variable, just like some men look as good as ever at 40, while others are fat and balding.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Much of the whole wall thing oozes with beta jealousy. Wall or not, many women can pull prime college guys until they are 50 probably. Whenever they want. Thats winning no matter what they are. Mr top tier RP poster child would be lucky to do half as well. And thats reality.

[–]1aguy01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People advice against emotional attachments to all whores. Bang whoever.

[–]anachronic -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Lots of people consider every women post-30 or sometimes even 25 to have "hit the wall". They advise not fucking women who have hit the wall.

Exactly. I'd bet that the guys saying that are probably teenagers or early-20's to whom age 30 feels like an eternity away.

I'm in my mid-30's, and although the pool is smaller (due to a lot of them being married or having kids), there's still plenty of attractive single women in their 30's & 40's.

Genetics, diet, exercise, etc... treat some women better than others. I know a couple 39-40 year olds that could seriously pass for 29 because they take care of themselves & have good genes.

[–]uns7able 238 points239 points  (3 children)

She'll find another guy. Probably quicker than I'll find the next girl. Doesn't matter, it isn't a competition. Maybe she'll land a BB husband. Or maybe she'll end up alone with her cat. I don't care either way. This is the way of the world. No point getting upset. It is what it is.

Insanely well put. Gave me jitters.

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (2 children)

Looks like women can play the field better than men without getting attached

[–]longerdistance 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Rollo has an article on this:

War Brides

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Of course they can. When it comes to getting what they want, most women are emotionless. Its just business. While most men are all emotional, blubbering about all kinds of horse shit fantasy. Thats part of the problem. Women are more alpha then most men. But they play a carefully crafted public role, their most closely guarded secret.

[–]AnotherLostCause 171 points172 points  (35 children)

Watch out for the "I think I"m pregnant we neeeeed to talk."

[–]Senior ContributorRedPope[S] 187 points188 points  (12 children)

Valid concern, but... I already had my kids. Got a vasectomy years ago. Results verified by the urologist. She's known since the first date. It was never a secret. Some of her coworkers and family know as well.

[–]GIFtoGasm 67 points68 points  (1 child)

Just so this doesn't get buried. This is an incredible post with so many excellent points. These are the stories I come here for. Desensitize any situation that can affect me in the future. Good frame bruh. You'll do just fine out there.

[–]tripwire1 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Good frame bruh. You'll do just fine out there.

The incredible thing about this is that his frame is so solid your words of encouragement aren't really even necessary. OP knows he's gonna do just fine out there before any of us even tell him. I respect the hell out of that.

[–]jimmamlvn 7 points8 points  (20 children)

Sorry to hijack top comment, but my question is what did OP do wrong? was this out of his control? I mean, from what i read, op was satisfying his ex but she still cheated on him for a lower SMV dude

[–]Chinny4daWinny 60 points61 points  (0 children)

Lessons learned:

Good sex is not enough to make a woman faithful. They have free and unlimited access to dick. If she wants it, she can get it. She was horny for me, but I wasn't there.

I gave her commitment and emotional validation as well. It still wasn't enough.

Nothing. These hoes ain't loyal.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

There are very few things that are guaranteed in life. Bitches being loyal if you do everything according to RP principles is not one of those things.

Whether OP did or didn't do something wrong is not something that can be determined with any kind of confidence. Maybe OP did everything right and this outcome was the best of all possible outcomes. Who knows. What is important is how he deals with what happens.

[–]the_code_always_wins 6 points7 points  (0 children)

There is a misconception that if you apply red pill well, any women will remain loyal. That's not true. TRP will work on a girl with the right mindset, but no nobody can turn a hoe into a housewife.

[–]1kingofpoplives 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Sorry to hijack top comment, but my question is what did OP do wrong?

He gave his commitment and dropped all other plates when he shouldn't have.

[–]Deresetese 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He said he doesn't have time for plates. I wouldn't consider doing what you want a mistake

[–]AnotherLostCause 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Many here like to think of TRP as a silver bullet for dealing with all women. IMHO there is a problem with this line of thinking. When you are dealing with badly damaged people, like say a 30 something CC rider, you can't always expect them to respond the way they should. In the same way that you can't really trust a dog that has been beaten too much. Yes it may behave perfectly 99% of the time but the chance is always there it will bite you for no reason. Now the OP may have made mistakes, but a slut being a slut doesn't necessarily prove that he did.

[–]teeelo 66 points67 points  (1 child)

Sometimes I can't believe this kind of information is free on the Internet. What a time to be alive.

[–]the10thrider 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If it's one thing I've learned from going to elementary school in the 90's it's how to search for anything I want on The InternetTM

IMO they probably did too good of a job there, really.

[–][deleted] 52 points53 points  (15 children)

"I don't even like him!" she protested. "It didn't mean anything. I wanted you, but you weren't there!"

Why does she say that? It makes things ten times worse for her.

Good riddance OP, you did well.

[–]2IVIaskerade 60 points61 points  (4 children)

She says it because she doesn't see things from your perspective. If you had cheated on her, there not being an emotional connection would make her less unhappy, so she assumes the same applies to you.

[–]1NV0K3R 24 points25 points  (1 child)

I can verify this.

Source: Used it on an LTR.

[–]BlackHeart89 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Lol Same... Sort of. I used it on my main plate. As long as she knows the other women are easily disposable, she's cool.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

That is fucked up. AWALT, I guess.

[–]2IVIaskerade 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That is fucked up.

Quite the opposite. It is great.

Remember, if she can't see things from your perspective, that means she's always seeing them from hers. So you know how she sees things - you know her.

"If you know both yourself and your enemy, you need not fear the outcome of a hundred battles." has been enshrined in writing for the last 2500 years.

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea 15 points16 points  (1 child)

No logic, just frantic hamstering the way a child tries to deflect blame. They'll say anything their emotions cook up to absolve themselves.

[–]TRP VanguardtrpSenator 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah, that's literally the worst excuse you could ever give. "Oh, okay. So then I need to worry about every time you get horny and I'm not around because you'll fuck another dude?"

[–]BlackHeart89 7 points8 points  (1 child)

RIGHT?!

Whenever I hear that, I think, "Sooo... you don't even have to like the motherfucker in order suck his dick? And thats suppose to make a guy trust you again???"

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

All sex is transactional to women. If she got whatever the return she wanted from it, then thats all that matters. Tying sex/ love together as men buy into in the west is a losers game. Women sure dont do it. Not in reality.

[–]1aguy01 6 points7 points  (2 children)

I remember when a girl fucked this dude she just met at a party and tried justifying it by saying "It didn't mean anything.. I didn't even know his first name!"

[–]mechdemon 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Now that is worth a hearty belly laugh as you walk out the door.

[–]krakosia 1 point2 points  (0 children)

little thing known as solipsism.

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

she's going to fuck her problems away, validation is better than prozac... for a while...

[–]torchbearer101 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Solid Post, thank you for sharing. Hope you used a rubber for that last romp!

"But I just didn't care. In the time it took me to take a piss, I had already written her off."

[–]Code_Bordeauxx 48 points49 points  (26 children)

The great dilemma is this: the more exciting and lively a girl is, the more likely she is to cheat on you. This girl in particular has a crazy sex drive and smokes pot. It was obvious that this was not going to last. That is perfectly fine though, plenty more wild rides out there. If you want lasting monogamy, better find a relatively shy one. Intensity versus endurance is the tradeoff.

[–][deleted] 63 points64 points  (24 children)

If you want lasting monogamy, better find a relatively shy one.

There is no such thing, unless you are planning on keeping her ass locked in a dungeon. She isn't yours. It is just your turn.

[–][deleted] 46 points47 points  (13 children)

She isn't yours. It is just your turn.

This quote cannot be repeated enough.

[–]Matharon 16 points17 points  (5 children)

The more I read this line, the more I believe things are better that way. Why would you want to own something like a broke-ass woman? Ownership is just a burden in that scenario.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (2 children)

The line has so many valid interpretations.

1) "Bitches ain't shit, but hoes and tricks". Have fun, but don't center your life around them.

2) There is nothing in life we can hold on to. Enjoy pleasure while it's present, but don't try to hold on to it. Possible buddhist interpretation.

[–]alanthemanofchicago 0 points1 point  (1 child)

RE #2: Good interpretation - I find that if you enjoy the pleasure [not just women, but really anything] without trying to hold onto it for dear life, you'll enjoy yourself more.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Attachment is the real issue. All things are transient in nature. Everything has an expiration date.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If emotional dependence is avoided, and STDs are contained, theres no real upside to owning a woman.

[–]Code_Bordeauxx 1 point2 points  (5 children)

Yes, but please do interpret it as a beneficial philosophy, and not as the literal truth. The quote helps in developing a mindset that protects you from heavy disappointment when good things come to an end. But it goes too far to interpret it as 'no relationship can possibly last a lifetime'. Because look around you, of course it can. Hell, as much as 90% of the marriages which start with the girl being a virgin last, don't they? (do NOT marry, that is not what I mean). That is the part KungPaoEllenTheFist doesn't understand. Mindset. Not literal truth.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Your pie in the sky marriage stats are useless. The only relationships in that stat that matter for your undying love of lifelong monogamy, are the ones that actually lasted decades, i.e. old farts. Well newsflash genius, old farts were raised when slut shaming and masculinity weren't evil. It takes more than good game to reliably keep hypergamy in check. Those days are long gone.

The rest of the relationships in your stats are too new to be called "life long". Hypergamy never ends. Sloots still got time to sloot.

You called me a pessimist a while back. You were mistaken. I am simply a realist. You just see me as being negative because you flew past optimism and ended up at naive.

Edit: and speaking of naive, just where the fuck do you think you are going to find yourself a virgin these days? You going to turn Amish? Start pimping in elementary schools? Buy one on ebay? I'm dying to know how this works into your plan to find your so-called exceptional woman.

[–]Code_Bordeauxx 0 points1 point  (3 children)

So, you are saying that statistic went from 90% to 0% in a few decades? Or even below 50%? Is that the realist speaking? We have no data that is fully up to date of course, so it may be lower now (probably is). But is it more reasonable to say it will be closer to 0%? Or to 90%? Society changes things, but we haven't made a full 180.

And yes, as long as women are alive, they can cheat. But sexual drive goes down with age, particulary in women. A postmenopausal one really has very little incentive to go out and fuck a nearby Chad. Normally speaking. We are not talking about theory here only, we are talking about how this turns out in practice. How many couples do you know that stayed together for 20 years but ended due to cheating? Yes it is possible, not very likely though.

But you really are a pessimist. Perhaps because you do not value LTRs anyway, but nevertheless. On the topic of Virgins: admittedly I do not know the situation in the US, but if you SMV is pretty high and you are not nearing 30 it is actually quite possible to find 18-20 year old virgins. Some girls are still being raised rather conservative and in a protective environment. She is not going to be the average wild fraternity hottie, but you can still find pretty ones. Girls with one previous LT partner are still a relatively safe bet too. I know this is possible not from theory, but personal experience. So go ahead and claim I won an impossible lottery. It doesn't change anything.

You seem to think certain things were once possible but society changed and now they have become impossible? What is your reason for assuming this? All the statistics we have still show it is doable to have a lasting LTR, albeit not easy. Until you show me statistics or other evidence that this is not the case, I'm going to put myself in the realist chair and say you are making baseless and exaggerated claims.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

The people you keep using in your examples grew up in a different time and with a society willing to help keep their women in line. I don't know how to make this any fucking clearer. It isn't the fucking 60s anymore. Get used to it. So sure, if you want to date post menopausal women because they were raised right, then knock yourself out.

If you think that the women of today are anything like them, then you are a fucking idiot, period.

And I have nothing against LTRs. I have told you before that they are absolutely possible. What isn't reliably possible is having one for life. Now stop twisting my words and pull your head out of your fucking ass.

[–]Code_Bordeauxx 0 points1 point  (1 child)

The people you keep using in your examples grew up in a different time and with a society willing to help keep their women in line.

I will repeat my question then, since you didn't answer it:

So, you are saying that statistic went from 90% to 0% in a few decades? Or even below 50%?

Do you actually believe society and social constructs had that much influence? And nevermind your beliefs, where is your proof of it? I have reliable data that are not up to date anymore. You have no data at all. Who would a realist think to be closer to the truth then? It seems you base what you say on nothing more than your personal beliefs, and yet you claim to speak truths. By what possible standards could you?

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Your stats are shit. They literally don't mean a god damned thing. I have answered your question only about a dozen times. Your head is just so far up your ass that you can't see the truth. You are fucking dreaming.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If she isn't yours and its just your turn,by not cheating your merely allowing her to optimise yet hypergamy and branch swinging,so you might as well cheat yourself and maxinise your polygamy

[–]BlackHeart89 1 point2 points  (2 children)

The truth is pretty painful. But I can't help but prepare for it. It may be a self-fulfilling prediction or whatever, but at least I won't be caught off guard. To me, its a reasonable trade off.

If you give a bitch an inch, she'll take the whole damn house and everything in it.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (1 child)

If you give a bitch an inch, she'll take the whole damn house and everything in it.

Should've given her more than the tip.

A full woman is a satisfied woman.

[–]BlackHeart89 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You could give a chick a train and it still won't be enough.

[–]Code_Bordeauxx -4 points-3 points  (5 children)

The hierarchy of women, go read that post already. And then the latest post from Archwinger. Let me know when you have so I can suggest further education material.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (4 children)

I will just wait for the FR you post when reality bites you in the ass and you finally accept AWALT.

It is blatantly obvious to me that you have put your girl on such a pedestal that you managed to convince yourself that she is special. That you can trust her because she is loyal, and would never put her happiness above your well-being, and blah blah blah.

It is "women are wonderful", pedestalization, oneitis, and a lack of abundance mentality all wrapped up in a nice little bow by your hamster.

I wouldn't give a shit that you have these stupid beliefs since it is your life to fuck up as you please. But you insist on preaching them nonstop as if they are red pill. They aren't.

We have been buried in blue pill propaganda for our entire lives. We don't need more of it coming out of the one place that is left to oppose it.

[–]Code_Bordeauxx -5 points-4 points  (3 children)

I aint gonna stop m8, because contrary to your belief, the truth is on my side. And opposed to you, at least I have examined counter arguments over and over. So, deal with it. Whatcha gonna do about it?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

I have examined your counter argument of NAWALT and determined that you don't know shit.

[–]Kaelteth 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Not that I'm looking to start a debate in semantics, but I've always personally viewed it as "All Women Are Capable Of That".

Nothing is 100% absolute - there ARE loyal women out there. BUT - you have to recognize that even a loyal woman can turn disloyal whore in a fucking heartbeat. IF you have a rare woman that is loyal, it is up to you, as the man, to keep her from wanting to stray.

I do agree with you though - the parent you are commenting on doesn't know shit. Sure, his woman might be loyal today, but there's no guarantee she will remain so tomorrow - and thinking she's some miraculous snowflake only increases the odds she'll branch swing.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

there ARE loyal women out there

No, there aren't. Loyalty, like honor, is a male abstract. Women are only loyal to their feelings.

[–]BlackHeart89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I assume every chick that smokes weed or drinks a lot will cheat. The hamster is already powerful enough. Then you add in shit that will impair your judgment? Psh. Its over. I just recently obtained a new plate who goes out of town every weekend to party and drink. If not for some guy who was a friend to another close friend hadn't told me she isn't "as promiscuous as xyz", I'd think she was a super slut. But now, I just think she's a slut. She's cool as fuck though.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (13 children)

Damm. Interesting story, thanks OP. Crazy how impossible it would have been to tell, without the cum stain. It all seemed pretty good to me until you got to that part. You really can't trust sluts for even a day. Stick to very low N count women or don't take the risk at all.

[–]Senior ContributorRedPope[S] 92 points93 points  (11 children)

Stick to very low N count women or don't take the risk at all.

Both those options suck. I'm too old to date girls in their early 20s. They annoy me. Every attractive post-college aged girl has a high N count. Without exception.

So I choose option #3. Accept the risk, know the consequences, and enjoy the ride. It may not last, but the next rider is always just around the bend.

[–]strps 19 points20 points  (0 children)

The fact that you found a stain there leads me to believe it was unprotected as well...just disgusting, but perhaps it's par for the course as they say.

I'm a similar age, un-divorced (never married) dad. Just had something similar happen to me as well. I responded in a very similar manner as well. Good on you. Never give them the hysteria they crave, it only reinforces it.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 14 points15 points  (0 children)

So I choose option #3. Accept the risk, know the consequences, and enjoy the ride. It may not last, but the next rider is always just around the bend.

And this is the world that modern social attitudes have earned us. Tragic, isn't it?

It's amazing that all it takes to topple an entire civilization are "the wrong attitudes about gender" compounded over several decades.

Living for the sake of our own happiness is all we can do now.

[–]1ThumpNuts 9 points10 points  (0 children)

EXACTLY!

People are so quick to forget AWALT. This chick with a high N count cheated with a raw cunt. A younger girl with a low N count could have cheated next weekend when she felt more neglected. Both would blame you for not being there.

So I choose option #3. Accept the risk, know the consequences, and enjoy the ride. It may not last, but the next rider is always just around the bend.

Amen! Preach on.

[–]BlackHeart89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So I choose option #3. Accept the risk, know the consequences, and enjoy the ride. It may not last, but the next rider is always just around the bend.

Same here. Though I'm still relatively young at 25. I've tried dating women that are 19 and they annoy the hell out of me. I can't deal. I feel like I'm taking advantage of a 13 year old or some shit. I pass on sex and cut them off.

I enjoy the company of women closer to my age and a bit older a lot more. But every time I'm with one, I think, "Wow. She's cool as hell. And the sex is on point. Too bad its gonna end soon. Better enjoy it while its here."

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

By the time a woman is 18, shes had hundreds of dicks offered to her, minimum. How do you mitigate that risk? Systematic, overwhelming, continuous oppression is about the only way to counteract that to any extent. Ie how they treat women in the ME. Other than that, its all risk.

[–]BleauGumms 1 point2 points  (5 children)

Not for Thai women. Their culture encourages young women, older men relationships.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

As a white american in SEA, you are preselected with a higher status based on wealth. All you have accomplished is moving yourself higher up the ladder comparative to your position in the west. Its the same ladder, same game. The girls are perhaps nicer and less jaded then what you are used to, but the game hasnt changed. I experienced this with an asian girl from asia. When she got to the US I thought things would improve, but I didnt know women then. When she got to the US I was no longer needed. The field was now leveled because it was all white western males. That event was the beginning of my RP journey. I "owe" her a lot. Because of that, Im twice the man I was then.

[–]Easih 0 points1 point  (1 child)

bringing her back was the mistake; it ruin everything once you do that.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didnt bring her here. She came over to finish her doctorate. She got out of pocket so I walked. But yeah I wouldnt bring a girl over if I could. Not worth it.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you recall the hot/crazy matrix?

There's a reason Thai women fall into a specific area....

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea 11 points12 points  (1 child)

There really isn't any such thing as being so alpha that a woman won't leave you. Just not how hypergamy works. Hell, obtaining you intrinsically lowers your SMV relative to a man she has yet to fuck (and obtain his seed).

Good FR, OP. Great perspective on how to position yourself emotionally with regards to LTR's.

[–]Kyuzo_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hypergamy doesn't care how alpha you were yesterday... If you're not there today.

[–]TheRationalMale.comRollo-Tomassi 9 points10 points  (1 child)

No amount of pussy is worth losing Frame over:

http://therationalmale.com/2011/10/12/frame/

[–]2IVIaskerade 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Coincidentally, losing frame leads to no amount of pussy.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Great FR

She probably doesn't even think she did anything wrong. She just wanted some weed and attention and traded sex for it.

In her mind, "it doesn't count" and OP is an "asshole"

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I like this part...

messaged a friend to buy $20 worth of weed. They smoked a bowl and had sex.

The sex was probably in lieu of payment... And now OP knows the real price of that pussy.

[–]YXxStrykerxXY 11 points12 points  (17 children)

Inspirational to say the least. Women are in a sense heartless, but we have to show them we are unmoved by the fact. That in itself speaks more than any words, drama, or action. Shows them the type of man you are. Good work OP. Keep up the good work.

[–][deleted] 24 points24 points

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[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

When girls tell me these kinds of stories, I write a new playbook every time. So what you're saying is.. you'd like a taste of your own medicine.. and I'm just the guy to do it.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points

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[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

You're smarter than the others, gathering intelligence on our training grounds to insulate yourself. You're a predator posing as a house pet, and I'm very interested to see how your boyfriend fares for the unforeseeable future. Checkmate.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points

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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your words reflect you well, beautifully crafted and yet hollow. What you really want, what you're really here for is to augment the cards in your hand. You wish to insulate yourself.

Don't you see? The only way to win the game is not to play.

[–]faunafauna -2 points-2 points [recovered]

Please don't make all women look mental.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Most of us when we get into to our 40s - especially us that have been through the divorce wringer with kids and all that shit - aren't prone to the heartbreak crater like our younger selves were.

We know that women are depraved - fucking selfish and manipulative. Nothing surprises us. We also know that if we have resources and physical fitness then we'll always have options.

When shit like this happens we shrug and say "Oh fucking well..." Now you know why the woman was single - hot, professionally successful, likes to fuck... You'd think that's decent wife material on the surface... But if she refuses to get off the cock carousel what can you do? Not that OP was looking to wife the bitch, but hey mystery solved. NEXT!

We don't sweat dumb shit. If women aren't fucking with our wallets or our kids then what they do is really non-consequential.

Finding some other dumb sloot to knock the bottom out of is as easy as falling out of bed.

[–]spicedncoke 12 points12 points [recovered]

"Good sex is not enough to make a woman faithful. They have free and unlimited access to dick. If she wants it, she can get it. She was horny for me, but I wasn't there.

I gave her commitment and emotional validation as well. It still wasn't enough. She's an older woman (33) with many past sexual partners. While she may have loved the way I made her feel, sexually and emotionally, both have far less value with experienced woman. The more partners a woman has had, the weaker the pair bonding. Even my best was not enough to maintain her loyalty."

So many guys fail to understand this. Guys will assume all is OK in their LTR because they think the sex is good and that they are getting it regularly. Only when they realize that there are issues with her/the LTR is when their woman has either already cheated, or planning an escape route. I know plenty of women who have broken up with their bfs in spite of them getting really good sex, but there's nothing else there and eventually get "bored". Not that it happened here...

OP, sorry it happened. But do you honestly think she cheated just because "she wanted dick"? I have a feeling there's more to this than what she's telling you. If there isn't, at least you found out now...never stick your dick in crazy.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 15 points16 points  (1 child)

she cheated just because

CC riding develops the hamster, to rationalize away all those hookups. A woman gets to a point she doesn't see it as cheating, at least when she does it. It's "just" sex.

In terms of character, this story reflects the quality of women these days... Nice packaging, but these hoes ain't loyal.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Loyalty is a male abstract. Women are incapable of loyalty regardless of their N-count.

If you think you found a loyal woman, all you have really found is a case of oneitis due to your lack of abundance mentality.

[–]Senior ContributorRedPope[S] 19 points20 points  (8 children)

do you honestly think she cheated just because "she wanted dick"? I have a feeling there's more to this than what she's telling you.

You never truly know the mind of another.

I could string together an endless list of maybes. Maybe I didn't give her enough commitment. Maybe I gave her too much attention. Maybe she wanted to sabotage the relationship. But I saw no signs of her desiring an exit. If anything, she was being both more affectionate and more sexual.

Regardless, I believe what I posted is accurate. I had her revved up to 11. Her desires were out of control, I wasn't there to satisfy them, and she chose not to restrain herself.

[–]1theoctopuss 19 points20 points  (2 children)

She would have fucked the pot dealer regardless. She's probably been fucking him for the last few months, at least.

I know how girls work. They create their own little harem of guys with different strengths. Guy 1 has a big dick, Guy 2 is extremely ripped, Guy 3 has an awesome car..."

See how that works? Most of the girls I plate have 3 or 4 other guys that they fuck. In my eyes, those guys are in the same situation as me. All we're doing is playing pinball with a dirty slut.

[–]netgrey 14 points14 points [recovered]

She's probably just fucking him to get free drugs. To her it's just a transaction.

[–]TitsAndWhiskey 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Was just about to say this. For those of you who are unaware, this is generally how attractive women get drugs. They find a dealer who is willing to barter.

Don't blame either party for that, honestly.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

IME the "revved up to 11" can be to compensate for poor behavior. I have a plate doing it right now. She's putting it on thick as a distraction in hope I won't pick up on the fact that she fucked her professor on a recent class trip. Hos gonna ho. Little different when it's someone you're seeing exclusively though. You handled that shit like a pro.

[–]TitsAndWhiskey -1 points0 points  (0 children)

People here sometimes do seem to think that fucking a woman right will keep her loyal.

It's a perversion of the idea that you need to be laying pipe like a god to keep a stable LTR. While true, it's just one factor in the equation.

[–]Endorsed Contributorbalalasaurus 3 points4 points  (2 children)

But do you honestly think she cheated just because "she wanted dick"? I have a feeling there's more to this than what she's telling you.

Who cares? That should not be a concern. Once that door is closed on your terms, it is closed. You don't look back; that's just a waste of energy. You look forward.

[–]spicedncoke 5 points5 points [recovered]

"Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it." - Winston Churchill

[–]Endorsed Contributorbalalasaurus -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Which is why I said "on your terms" in italics. If the door closes for reasons outside of your own then it pays to retrospect. Otherwise you move on to the next one.

[–]Polishrifle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The last question here is an exercise in futility.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Damn, It seems we need to tattoo "AWALT" in our forearms.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (7 children)

Maybe I'm too cynical but I believe that whenever a ltr occurs cheating occurs. I know this is a huge generalisation, but I believe that loyalty really cannot be expected from human beings in general, not just women. Reason being that all of us have a cheater inside of us. 'Out of character' is a great book that explains how nobody is really a cheater or a loyal partner; we are constantly shifting on the scales, moving from loyal to cheating to loyal... There are no real 'cheaters', just as there are no people who are always 'loyal'. We exist within a spectrum and move constantly from one side to the other.

[–]Danedina 8 points9 points  (1 child)

We all have moments of weakness. The difference between a cheater and someone who is faithful is avoiding putting yourself in the position to cheat. My ex-gf would trickle truth me about dates she would go on, and there'd always be a part where more people were supposed to show up but it then it was just me and him. Naturally, nothing ever happened between her and these guys... I should have nexted her then, but the red pill hadn't reached my bloodstream yet.

[–]TitsAndWhiskey 8 points9 points  (0 children)

These girls think we're stupid. That's the part that gets me. Sure, sweetheart. I'm sure the 3rd guy you've introduced to me this week as your "friend" has that little twinkle in his eye for some other reason than what I'm thinking.

It got to the point with my most recent ex where I would play dumb and squeeze the trickle truth out of her drop by drop just to watch her squirm.

I was never wrong. Trust your gut, fellas.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The term is "opportunist." Given the chance, with no repercussion, everyone of us would stray given the right temptress. It's just nature.

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There is some truth to this. Biologically we are not monogamous beings. Both male and female sexual strategy involves mating with more than one partner. It just so happens that the optimal strategy for females is obtaining mates spaced out a little further apart.

The only things keeping humans from acting on their base instincts is cultural override. That's why we say to find traditional or religious girls. Short of mental reprogramming, all women will have the urge to chase new dick, eventually.

[–]Dr_HoaxArthurWilmoth 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Take notes kids. Aspire to have the frame of this man. "Drama" will only waste your time as well as petty revenge on someone no longer worth your time.

This reminds me of all the time I wasted in my teens and early 20's trying to "get back" at an ex and being angry about someone who would never be part of my life again.

[–]Late30sMasculist 12 points13 points  (13 children)

I spent a wonderful three day weekend with my girlfriend of five months. We've been monogamous since March.

Know what you want. I was not in love. I was never looking for a LTR. I don't have time to spin plates, so I prefer short-term relationships.

Those 2 quotes seem contradictory to me. I'm curious about why you would get into a monogamous relationship in the first place. Was it your idea or hers?

If hers, why did you agree to it? What did you get out of it?

If you're after what amounts to a friends with benefits relationship, why limit yourself through monogamy?

I'm not criticizing, just trying to understand your motivation.

[–]Senior ContributorRedPope[S] 83 points84 points  (11 children)

I don't mind the questions.

Why monogamy? Time, reputation, and stability. I'm a dad with a busy career. I simply don't have time to spin multiple plates. I'm also a bit older, with a big family, and fairly active in the community. Dealing with one woman at a time, I can screen them more carefully and eventually let them meet my kids, family, and community. No one looks twice if you have a couple girlfriends a year. It is considered healthy and normal.

Personally, I like relationships. More specifically, I like the first 6-12 months of a relationship. I'm sure most of us would agree, those early months are the best part of a relationship. The most exciting, the most fun, and the most sex. So that is my target goal: short-term monogamous relationships.

What I find amusing... I'm basically taking pages straight out of the women's playbook. College bimbo years excluded, women don't flaunt their casual hookups. Those are kept anonymous and hidden. Marriage is only sought once they decide they're ready for it. So what do they do until then? Exactly the same as me: 1-2 steady relationships per year.

I stopped looking for THE girl. I'm looking for this year's girl. If she proves disloyal, or if the attraction fades, I simply move on and start hunting for the next.

[–]TitsAndWhiskey 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm in a very similar position, and I use this strategy as well. I've found that as an added benefit, the few exes that have met the kids are a valuable resource. I have one that is essentially on call for child care and sex.

[–]rpscrote 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I read a post you made on this strategy many moons back and I've since adopted it as my own, as I had a vague inclination this is what I wanted but I couldnt articulate the way you have here.

Thanks for the serial STR tip, it really is a page out of their book. It works great for me too.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points

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[–]Senior ContributorRedPope[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Repeat after me:

"I do not owe her an explanation."

You have decided to end the relationship. It doesn't matter why. You have nothing to gain by trying to explain your decision. It will only make it worse. Stick to the facts: The relationship is over. You are not changing your mind.

She is going to be unhappy. No one likes being dumped. But you are no longer her boyfriend. It is not your place to offer her comfort. Any attempt to soothe her will only make it worse. Once you leave, she will call a friend or relative. It is their job to talk her through this, not yours.

Keep it short and to the point. A quick break is the cleanest. The longer you remain, the more emotional she will become. Offer no explanation. Offer no words of comfort. Announce your decision, tell her it is final, and say goodbye.

[–]1kingofpoplives -1 points0 points  (3 children)

More specifically, I like the first 6-12 months of a relationship. I'm sure most of us would agree, those early months are the best part of a relationship. The most exciting, the most fun, and the most sex. So that is my target goal: short-term monogamous relationships.

The only issue I've found with this strategy is the shitty dry period that often happens after the break up. It's ideal if you can at least keep a little bit going on the side so you don't have to start back up from a dead stop.

[–]ChadwickStormphallus -1 points0 points  (2 children)

I find it easiest to overlap two relationships by a month or so. This gives you "reasons" to be too busy to spend increasing amounts of time with the previous woman, who is trying to pin you down for relationship stuff (which is a waste of your time since it will end soon). And once your eye is beginning to wander and you find a new woman, it's a good indication that the previous relationship should be drawing to a close.

[–]1kingofpoplives 0 points1 point  (1 child)

How often do you run into any issues with drama from cheating?

Generally I prefer to keep things open, only because I would rather not lie or get caught lying to a woman and deal with the resulting drama. I can see how your way would be easier in some ways though. You don't need to negotiate the open relationship, you just do what you want regardless.

[–]ChadwickStormphallus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hasn't been an issue so far. Maintain tight control of your life and don't do dumb stuff like give the woman access to your phone/email. It isn't very difficult to have 2 at once for a short period of time.

[–]BlackHeart89 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This idea has occurred during the days passing of this last week. I've seriously been considering it.

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Not OP, but I can give some perspective.

There's a bit of emptiness with seeing women perpetually outside of your internal emotional investment. I straight up got bored with inviting plates over after fucking them a few times. A lot of them are really insipid and basic, no real value outside of their bodies. The work involved in setting up new ones didn't seem as enticing as other, non-relationship related activities. It was like pigging out on ice cream. After a while, new flavours just don't really do much for you.

Even without developing oneitis you get a type of companionship in the initial stages of an LTR that you don't get with plates you're keeping just out of arm's reach. In my case I happened to run into a girl with exceptional LTR qualities. If you know what to look for, you'd know they're exceptionally rare. 1 in 10,000, easily. There are no unicorns, but there's a top 20% for women too.

Not to say that this couldn't all end tomorrow, and if it did I'd deal with it and eventually start over again. Would still prefer LTR's to plate-spinning at this stage of my life.

[–]Apanthropos 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This a great post and a good example to anyone that believes they can make a woman loyal through good sex.

[–]Ochreata 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Gotta love this comment;

"I don't even like him!" she protested.

Basically translates as; "I fuck guys I'm not attracted to when I'm horny, I'm a slut!"

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To me, translates to "I really like him, but he's not a trophy!"

[–]crotchetyMFer 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Thank you for this excellent FR. Reminds me of an ex I dated for two years. We were having sex 5-6 days per week, but during those 1-2 days apart she was sleeping with someone else. When you're seeing someone that often imagining them cheating is usually the furthest thing from mind. I wish I would have found some dirty sheets...

One question though:

Two days later, a mutual friend (more hers than mine) asked what happened. I simply told her we parted amicably. We had moved on.

I understand wanting to wash your hands of it all and be done with it, but why lie here? I would have said exactly what happened without any embellishment, "she slept with X a few days ago so I ended it."

[–]2IVIaskerade 6 points7 points  (0 children)

why lie here

If you do not want your enemy to fight as hard as they can, you must leave them an escape route. So too with social situations.

A woman with an incentive (loss of social status) to sabotage you is dangerous. The lie costs nothing, and results in a better outcome for all.

[–]Praecipuus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She was my spring fling, nothing more. Spring is over and she is gone. Time to find her replacement.

Time to look forward to Summer.

[–]psychedelicjourney 6 points6 points [recovered]

We're both attractive, physically fit, and have very high sex drives.

Don't we have any ugly and fat people on this sub? It's like some of you are living in a fantasy book.

[–]2IVIaskerade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, we do. They're not the endorsed contributors posting field reports.

There's under 100 ECs. There's 115,000+ plebs. Of course the cream of the crop are going to be fit and handsome.

[–]rpscrote 5 points6 points  (0 children)

fat is a temporary state at best to a sufficently motivated man

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yo, fat and ugly. Right here.

[–]NeoreactionSafe 6 points7 points  (1 child)

The rich get richer, the poor stay the same.

The sexually active get more active, the inactive stay the same.

The woman that gets a tremendous amount of stimulation then needs that level sustained or she goes into withdrawl symptoms.

So it is a paradox that the more sexually stimulated a women gets the more likely they can't help but cheat to get another fix.

I have no answer for it... Dread Game seems the closest thing to an answer.

Fear is about the only way to limit hypergamy.

On the positive side women can be extremely fearful because their hamster minds will blow up the fears into grand proportions. So a culture that infused fear into women were more likely to have women stay loyal. It makes the concept of the "fear of god" make sense. (long gone)

In todays culture which lacks fear and promotes the joys of infidelity there is little chance to prevent hypergamy.

AWALT and today it's not even a secret.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chekhov's_gun

By always improving, you induce that fear. Overt fear mongering only weakens your position & invites her to undermine you with the insecurity argument. Chekhov & Raymond Carver were some of my favorite authors in high school, I realized why a few years later.

[–]The_Americano 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Gents, witness here the birth of an Alpha Widow!

[–]trowawayyada 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She was AW'd years ago, most are by 25......possibly younger than that.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points

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[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The reason he broke up was because she cheated, so probably not.

Then again, he may have gotten bored in a few years and traded in for a newer model. However, that's impossible to predict at this time.

[–]chadchadington 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Solid my brotha. Definition of stoic.

There's a reason that psych statistic exists claiming after a few dozen partners pair bonding becomes difficult. No wonder the CC is the bane for most men with respect to women. You can have fun but avoid LTRs with these women.

[–]davipbl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow, I am not an alpha yet, but that is the way I would have done if I were at your position. I liked the seriousness and ethical involvement you had with her. Way to go, RedPope. Someday I'll manage to control my life in the way you seem to control yours.

[–]krakosia 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Standing applause worthy performance Sir.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What fucks me up man, is that imagine if you didnt ever find that stain? You stay with that women, still thinking everything is going good and both are happy, but you dont know she cheated. Thats what fucks my head so much about women. You can waste so much time

[–]IronMeltsinmyHands 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I noticed what she said. The way they write off blame, it should be an art form.

I don't know why, I'm still in the anger phase.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Focus on the light at the end of the tunnel, which is..

"Oh, it's all a joke. There's plenty to go around so I just don't give a fuck."

[–]Keninishna 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wonder what her subconcious was getting into, its like a robot script..

Ego activate... scan area for discreet sex... text drug dealer 20$ come over... get high and horny.... bang.... leave cum on sheets... invite bf over and act nervous and use bathroom so he would have to use one upstairs... he finds cum... breakup!

I wonder, OP did you verbally agree with her that it was a monogamous relationship? or was it implied?

[–]kempff 3 points4 points  (1 child)

When I come out, she's pulling the sheets off the bed. Very nonchalantly, she says, "The cat was on the bed, let me change the sheets. She's shedding like crazy."

Yep. When someone feels compelled to give an explanation for something that normally requires none, it's meant to conceal something.

[–]DoItLive247 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't expect any stupidity.

Don't count your chickens before they hatch.

[–]AFSundevil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She'll find another guy. Probably quicker than I'll find the next girl. Doesn't matter, it isn't a competition. Maybe she'll land a BB husband. Or maybe she'll end up alone with her cat. I don't care either way. This is the way of the world. No point getting upset.

I usually don't feel the need to post on here but that's a very solid outlook that more people can benefit from. From a young RPer to a veteran: good on you for being grounded. I hope to develop those qualities as well.

[–]prodigy2throw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Don't let yourself get attached to anything you are not willing to walk out on in 30 seconds flat if you feel the heat around the corner."

[–]asianmasaccount 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just wanted to say I really liked this post. Sounds like the writing of a grown-ass man.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lessons learned :

  • women can't be faithful

  • monogamy does not work

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 1 point2 points  (1 child)

If you're dating a woman, you're in an open relationship.

Reminds me of a conversation I had with one of my best friends back in NYC--guy's a well-known, extremely successful trial lawyer, lives in a beautiful $7K / month loft downtown, has his own practice (specializing in divorce, of course), man’s highly-educated, worldly, been around the block a few times, etc etc. So we're catching up, we get on the topic of women somehow, and at one point, he says something like: “You know, I’m beginning to think this is how it works: when you're together, you treat her like a Queen, like she's the only person in the universe, and that's that... But when you're NOT together, you do what you want, she does what she wants—really, I think that's the only possible way it can actually work…”

I remember, at the time, several years back (pre-Red Pill) how shocked I was, when this guy just laid it all out for me like that--it just seemed so cold, and bare... So “not romantic”, so very "un-Fairy-Tale-esque"... Now that I've been around the block a few times myself (and happened upon you fine people here in the Red Pill about a year and a half ago), honestly, looking back at that one talk, I think this guy might have unwittingly stumbled upon the very future of relationships, right there…

Enjoy ‘em when you’re with ‘em, assume they’re seeing other people when you’re not. Only way to go. (Bonus side effect: you’ll never be cheated on again—you can’t “lose fidelity” if it was never a part of the equation in the first place).

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

All relationships are open relationships, and all sex is transactional. Most men just dont know it yet. Thus why should any man agree to monogamy? It just lowers your SMV, and you gain no guarantee from it.

[–]peanutbutter4all 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great post. Not entirely unexpected and further strengthens the necessity of a RP mindset.

[–]Kite23 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Outstanding, you are a pro

[–]1R_Model_07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If it's too good to be true it probably is. A headstrong woman uses sex like an ATM card. The impulsive ones like to test boundaries. Like a serial killer that leaves too many clues, they seemingly want to be caught, but not really. It's about surfing that fine line.

If they talk about sex like someone would talk about sports keep them at arms length. Because the chances are they are bored with traditional relationship roles and like to fuck on the side to keep things interesting.

[–]CRITICAL9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

May have been posted before, but this highlights the fact that women often consider emotional involvment with another parter as a worse form of cheating than just physical action while it is vice versa for men.

[–]CastingLimerence 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Alpha as fuck bro. Much respect.

[–]the_red_scimitar 0 points1 point  (5 children)

I totally get this. That kind of disrespect is a full stop, and a complete next.

I've taken some serious shit on this sub for expressing the same idea, but now, mods are on top of the "my way is the only way" shaming.

No questions here about that final fuck - makes perfect sense. I've done exactly the same to a few plates who just couldn't figure out how to show respect.

I'm non-monogamous, and date mostly women who profess the same. One plate (similarly multi-orgasmic to your ex) has another, longer term partner who is utterly beta, but has that whole belief that whomever fucks a plate best will be that plate's partner. He goes on these long (think 4-6 hour) fuck sessions. She loves fucking, but she tells me about being bored. She recently "demoted" him from her primary, to "another boyfriend", which flipped him out. And he tells her how she should just "be with the_red_scimitar, since you have better orgasms with him." I don't know about that, but it's hilarious that he's even concerned. In fact, this was just a couple nights ago (another plate last night). A great fuck may or may not "close" a potential plate, but it won't keep them. It's about the tingles they feel emotionally, for the longer term.

And there's also where she's at - still riding the CC, or on the BB hunt? Or, as is all too often, a bit of both? Exactly what will keep her attracted varies depending on the flavor of dualistic sexual strategy (AF/BB) she's using.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Hahaha polyamory, tantric sex, open relationships - byproducts of the nuclear level fusion at the core of female logic & the background heat of the hamster universe.

[–]the_red_scimitar -2 points-1 points  (3 children)

Ah, shaming. And I thought that was officially forbidden here. Let's not get into your lack of understanding. There's no end to that discussion.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

What makes you think you're immune to that revolving door in her cunt?

If your endgame isn't an LTR, that's fine. I just don't see a meaningful outcome deriving from those types of relationships.

Your post is a cute humblebrag with a a heaping helping of acquiescence & pats on the back.

[–]the_red_scimitar -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

And you're shaming me? Go post in two-xx or whatever, where that's not recognized as beta bullshit.

[–]yummyluckycharms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People tend to forget that the biggest chink in anyone's armour is drugs. It causes people to do stupid things, lose their inhibitions, and generally, not think straight.

OPs girlfriend was a pothead, who got high, and basically fucked her dealer. I've heard that story a thousand times with variation of the drug being used, but eventually, there will always be a exchange of drugs for sex somewhere down the line.

I"m sorry OP - but if you date a druggie - you're going to get cuckolded.

[–]Hedphelym1 -2 points-1 points  (3 children)

I don't know what to say about this lol. It's impossible not to have emotions... i'm not a psychopath. To never get hurt means you never love. That might even be worse...

[–]2IVIaskerade 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Here's a post by u/GSnow about dealing with the deaths of people you know.

It applies to leaving relationships, too. If you've had a good number of relationships, by the time you're OP's age you'll be used to dealing with them ending.

[–]blacwidonsfw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That it's a perfect analogy. Thanks for posting that

[–]Senior ContributorRedPope[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I've been in love before. I wasn't in love with her.

I have the normal healthy range of emotions. Did I feel hurt? Absolutely. But it washed over me pretty quickly. I simply wasn't that invested.

Chalk some of it up to age and experience. After a divorce and a half dozen other LTRs, you learn to recognize the difference between new relationship infatuation and enduring love.

[–]Tarnsman4Life 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Abundance mentality; well played for not ignoring it and wifing up a slut. If your really down for an LTR you can do better, always remember you are the prize. Don't worry about her, she will get knocked up by some AF, lock down BB and live her AWALT lifestyle.

[–]invader_red 0 points1 point  (2 children)

And this is why you don't ever do the "monogamy" part. Perfect red pill response, but why did you ever fall into monogamy? They never abide by it, so why would you you agree to it?

[–]SeekingTheWay 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'd say because it's time effective. Maintaining one plate sure is easier than acquiring new ones over and over. Also, a LTR can give you emotional satisfaction besides the sexual one, and we all need that too sometimes.

[–]1whatsazipper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's foolish. There's no real tangible benefit. Any talk about 'ease' is nonsense because it's relatively easy to spin up some side action during a 'relationship'. Given the current state of relationships, this strikes me as necessary. Monogamy as a facade as the OP points out but then fails to modify his behaviors.

"Gee wiz, that's just how it goes".

[–]strps 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's like we are living parallel lives. I've almost questioned how cooly I left the last scenario, after fucking her once beyond finding out about some guy she was trying to work into her rotation.
I'm glad to hear someone else would do it that way, too.

[–]mintegral 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My inner beta self wants to say "I am sorry for you", but then I realize that it is what it is and what we all have to expect at some point. It's nature.

I call her up. She asks if I'm upset. I calmly respond, "Of course. You slept with some other guy." She denies it. I tell her I saw the sheet. She goes quiet, then tries to claim it was me, from the previous week. I tell her to stop lying.

I maintained an emotionless and calm tone throughout the entire conversation. I'll spare you the drawn out trickle truth. It took 10 minutes to get the full story. ...

I am wondering how you did get the full story out of her? Often, if the hamstering is strong in a woman it's really hard to "break through" her, in order to get to the truth, or to get her to tell the truth. Would it possible for you to somehow break down the conversation with her?

[–]DoesNotMatterAnymore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I walk by her bed and immediately notice a dried cum stain in the center of the sheets.

Let me share my first thought after reading this sentence:

A prostitute at least has a clean sheet on, even before you arrive. Not all of them(!), but most of them.

[–]Nazrath2112 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great cautionary tale. Would read again.

[–]thenarrrowpath 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't sacrifice your frame/dignity just so she can have her closure.

RP in the most succinct way possible. Sorry it happened to you.

[–]Tailback 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She didn't pay the guy $20 for the pot. The sex was the payment for the pot.

Back in the early 90's after getting out of the Army, I went through a couple month phase of smoking pot. I bought it from a friend of a friend's girlfriend. She would go to the dealer, give him a blowjob for the pot, then sell it to me. In her hamster mind I'm sure she somehow rationalized that she wasn't a whore.

That experience was the beginning of me understanding some of the principles that are talked about here.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great insight, thanks OP.

Not relevant to OP because of the top mentality this man has, but it does seem that no matter what - without a degree of dread then they will always look to fuck any man, completely guilt free, cause AWALT.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your last paragraph is perfect. That is how it is after you swallow the pill and this shit no longer surprises you and you no longer ALLOW it to bother you because you know how to react to it and that life goes on. You can wallow in that shit or you can maintain frame and keep moving on.

[–]Entershikari 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This fucking post wall woman was a nymphomaniac. I'm amazed at the fact that she cheated with a lower SMV guy.

[–]1jimjackjoe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

for me, a super-high sex drive in a chick is a turn-off. I get a weird vibe from these types...a hint of dull, ineffective masculinity. of course, that's only from the perspective of my limited experience.

[–]Gamezob 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ice...

Damn that sounded cool

[–]cleftscout 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I read this post so intrigued and excited, you're a great writer and I was so excited to read about how I should have handled my last breakup. I did everything wrong, and it was great to read the right way to do it. Thank you for this post.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've met this guy. Hell, I've bought weed from him too.

For the love of god, find a quality supplier.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Great post. I could easily be wrong but I worry that you're trying to over-hide the fact that you were hurt. Take a couple days and just feel the pain, process it, and then heal. Maybe instantly going for "numb" is being a bit rough on yourself. Just a stab in the dark.

[–]bexpert -1 points0 points  (5 children)

OP, great post, but I just have one burning question: Why did you dump her?

If truly all women are like that, then what's the point in dumping her? Are you trying to punish her? Are you punishing yourself? What do you gain by dumping a woman who is still throwing herself at your feet, but just enjoys a dick on the side every now and then? What's the difference if she's had a few other cocks in her 5 years ago vs 5 days ago? Are you going to keep searching for that one unicorn who WON'T cheat on you? Because that is an endless quest, sir.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

AWALT, but some are more LT than others.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

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[–]bexpert -1 points0 points  (1 child)

But, AWALT. She wasn't showing disrespect, she was just acting in accordance with her nature. Is it disrespectful when a raccoon steals your potato chips from behind your back? Maybe, but it's the racoon's nature to scavenge, so it is the woman's nature to seek dicks. You wouldn't throw out your whole lunch just to teach the racoon a lesson for disrespecting your food.

[–]2IVIaskerade 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You wouldn't throw out your whole lunch just to teach the racoon a lesson for disrespecting your food.

No, but I would throw the raccoon out of the house and lock the door behind it. The bit of the lunch it touched goes in the bin, and I move on to another piece of the meal.

[–]Deep_Fried_Foreskin -2 points-1 points  (14 children)

I have a question. What exactly is wrong with A girl having sex with someone that isn't you? It's just sex. I was never able to wrap my mind around it and it's never been explained. "Cheating" sounds like a problem somebody insecure would have.

I hope you'll help me understand. But most of you would probably rather down vote because I'm making you uncomfortable with these difficult questions.

[–]hibloodstevia 2 points3 points  (4 children)

It's not a difficult question at all. You simply lack the proper functioning of your brain that causes jealousy. You may even be sexually gratified by cuckolding.

Everything should be judged by evolutionary terms - allowing the woman that you pour your time and resources into to become impregnated by another man, does not do anything to further your own genes.

Therefore you fail at your biological imperative.

If you need something more concrete that fits today's world:

  • She fucked a guy without a condom; possibly exposing OP to disease.
  • They were in a monogamous relationship; which she ignored on a whim. Showing that she cannot be trusted. Why would you willingly associate with someone who shows you that they cannot be trusted?
  • The fact that she blamed OP for it happening shows an irrational mind. Why would you want to willingly associate with someone who makes irrational decisions?
  • She fucked a guy she didn't even like and didn't know well. Who else is she making bad decisions with?

[–]Deep_Fried_Foreskin -4 points-3 points  (3 children)

You may even be sexually gratified by cuckolding.

you redpillers sure know how to put someone down tactfully. Sheesh.

Anyways, I'll probably never understand "monogamous" relationships or the virtue of "passing your genes". You humans are strange.

[–]hibloodstevia 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I did not attach or intend any negative connotations in my reply to you.

[–]Deep_Fried_Foreskin 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Neither have I. Just amused at being called a cuck in such a charming way.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your threshold for difficult questions must be lower than Blockbuster stock, son.

Sex is a team sport. Jerkin' it isn't. If someone plays for your team and wearing another team's jersey, you've got yourself a double-agent.

[–]1aguy01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree. Women are not worthy of marriage and should be kept as plates. Insecure guys just need more quality plates.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (5 children)

What exactly is wrong with A girl having sex with someone that isn't you?

A few things, none of which are worth going into here.

A girl having sex with someone who isn't you when she agreed not to, however is a problem.

Also, stop whining about downvotes, it makes you look like a bitch and makes people more likely to downvote you out of spite.

[–]Deep_Fried_Foreskin -2 points-1 points  (4 children)

I'm unsure why anyone would want such an agreement.

it makes you look like a bitch

I'm just trying to fit in on reddit.

[–]2IVIaskerade 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I'm unsure why anyone would want such an agreement.

Your autism aside, it doesn't matter. What matters is that that's the situation.

[–]Deep_Fried_Foreskin -3 points-2 points  (2 children)

it doesn't matter

It's the entire reason I'm shitposting ITT: I want to know what people gain from monogamy. It sounds dumb.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Men gain sole access to the reproductive capability of the woman, the woman gains sole access to he man's resources. Throw in some emotional support, division of labour, and financial stability, and mjx thoroughly. Voila! One recipe for a stable society.

You would have known this if you had looked for it instead of shitposting.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

Why did you dump her? Did she mean something to to you? You claim that she didn't, but if that was the case, why didn't you just keep her as a plate?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cause some plates crack, and buyin' 'em by the pack saves time and money.

[–]spliffdecisions -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You maintain good control, very admirable.

[–]awoods5000 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

you're the man. great frame. So scary to think that you could have ended up wasting a lot of time with her if you never saw her sheets.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

At first I was like why is he humble bragging here I don't want to read the...oh, this is interesting. Exceptional fr, love the way you deal with it. Calm cool and collected, and absolutely true from my experience

[–]Vigilo_Infinite -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If anything this says to me the way she (and many women) approach sex is corrupted.

You want a girl whos wild and unrestricted but the reason she's wild and unrestricted is because she doesn't value sex very highly as an act. Doesn't surprise me when she goes and does it with the nearest fucktoy because her primary guy isn't around.

Makes her a whore through and through and it's a good thing you found out at 5 months before things became more serious.

I like your pragmatic nature as you detailed it in this post.

[–]BleauGumms -1 points0 points  (1 child)

You messed up. You should have tried to talk her into some anal for that last romp.

[–]SeekingTheWay 0 points1 point  (0 children)

(implying anal wasn't already involved...)

[–]santander26 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Solid post. Your "ice cold" attitude was the key.

[–]R3v4mp3d -1 points0 points  (1 child)

If you're good, she cheats; if you're bad, she cheats. This gets me pondering why one would even consider a LTR. I'm currently in a LTR but I see little red flags around me (prolly because I'm her first and shit's still like a dream in her head). I'll keep sharp until I'm certain that everything's smooth and transparent.

Good job OP for not being emotionally involved!

[–]1whatsazipper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Always field other candidates while maintaining a main chick, if a "LTR" is what you want. That's the response that works in this climate.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children)

I don't understand this psychology, why cheat and lie about it? Your boyfriend/girlfriend actually hates you they just don't know it yet, how are women okay with that? The whole relationship is fake, everything you say to eachother, all the plans you make, so what's the point?

[–]DoesNotMatterAnymore 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The hamster is really powerful, that rodent can twist and turn reality. You can be in the top 20% but still have to do something to get pussy. Only when you are in the top 1-5% when pussy lines up for you, all you have to do is to accept it. If OP is honest, the girl is attractive and fit, cock is abundant for her. All she has to do is to accept it if she is in great need.

Imagine that i gave you a plate of pasta, but i withhold any cutlery. You have a choice, you eat like a cavemen, or don't eat at all... "Difficult choice!" Later on i feel sorry for you, i gave you a plastic fork. I bet you will be happy, because you can finally eat like a civilized human being. In a great need, you don't care about it's not a silver fork, you are happy with the plastic one. But after you done with your meal, what you gonna do, are gonna keep your new favorite plastic fork? No fuckin way, it was a one use only, has no value for you anymore, you gonna toss it away.

The weed dealer was a "one use only" (i bet she fucked him multiple times during the years, when she was in a "great need"), when she was done with him, she toss him away, not even think twice about it. I even bet she might fantasized about OP while she fucked the dealer.

The solipsistic nature of a woman will - as i said before - twist and turn reality, it's fluid for her, since EVERYTHING is based upon her CURRENT emotional state. She was horny, the dealer was there, i bet she fucked him before, the situation is not new, this is all about urges.

The most important part of this "Dirty sheets" story is, that in her head this wasn't a big deal, she was so FINE with it, she didn't even hid the evidence.

[–]1aguy01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Women operate on emotion, not reality. When she says 'i love you' what's happening is in that moment she 'loves' you and wants you to know. When she fucks the other guy she's just horny and wants to get plugged. Then when she's with you again she starts feeling that 'love' once more.

[–]Bearhardy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well shit. This post is a huge reality chwck. Keeping stoicism high yo.

[–]skdjk100 -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Talking about cheating, don't you guys think that Tiger Woods ex wife also could have potentially cheated but it is not known? Or perhaps she was witholding sex and he went had sex with the whole universe?

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We'll never know. Female martyrdom (even from an ex-supermodel turned housewife #thestruggle) will always overshadow the male equivocation, especially in the media & even more so in the sports media. Shaming successful male athletes for violating traditional norms is simply too hard to resist, whether it's based on envy of their success, or undermining women's ability to use their bodies to make money.

Edit: see Hope Solo case versus any male athlete getting caught up domestic abuse.

[–]totorox -1 points0 points  (0 children)

She didnt need OP's commitment, so why sould she give him sexual exclusivity?

She's a high class professional, she's still hot at 33. She doesnt need a man. That explains her carelessness.

Why did OP give her commitment?

I gave her commitment and emotional validation as well.

What for? He gave his currency without her even asking for it. Why wouldn't she treat it with disrespect?

[–]agenthex -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

TL;DR: Some people can never get enough.

We're both attractive, physically fit, and have very high sex drives.

I'm done with her. She cheated. It is over.

Then...

we immediately start having sex.

OK, so not over when you realized she cheated. Just over after you get your dick wet one more time.

They smoked a bowl and had sex. The end.

You already knew not to trust her, right?

He's the stereotypical loser pothead.

Says the guy with an empty fridge in a dirty apartment.

She wanted dick. He had dick.

Simplified, but true.

"I don't even like him!" she protested. "It didn't mean anything. I wanted you, but you weren't there!"

Hamster spinning the wheel.

I told her we were done. She was a free woman and could do what she liked, but I wasn't going to see her again. She cried and begged forgiveness. I calmly said good night and hung up.

So you intentionally mislead her after she lied to you? Well, that just makes things even.

Some of you may be wondering why I chose to fuck her that final time. This was one final bang with an ex.

No, you were horny and she was there.

Some loser pothead raw dogs your girl, but you go for the sloppy seconds anyway because you want to.

Good sex is not enough to make a woman faithful. They have free and unlimited access to dick. If she wants it, she can get it. She was horny for me, but I wasn't there.

Everything but that last line is true. The last line is still her excuse, which for all you know is bullshit.

Even my best was not enough to maintain her loyalty.

It is never their fault.

All people are like that.

When you break up with a girl, do it calmly and without emotion. Don't make a scene. Don't give her drama as a parting gift. They crave that emotional climax. A big finale. Don't sacrifice your frame/dignity just so she can have her closure.

If you want to do it, do it. Either way, if you do it, stick to it. If you don't care, keep fucking her until you're done. Just don't get that bitch pregnant.

Know what you want. I was not in love. I was never looking for a LTR. I don't have time to spin plates, so I prefer short-term relationships. All I ever wanted was 6 months of companionship and good sex. I'm not going to cry because I only got 5. She was my spring fling, nothing more. Spring is over and she is gone. Time to find her replacement.

Done.

TL;DR:

This is the way of the world. It is what it is.

Yup.

[–]bluedrygrass -4 points-3 points  (4 children)

"I've met this guy. Hell, I've bought weed from him too. He's the stereotypical loser pothead. Nice enough guy, but he's pudgy, and has no ambition. An out of shape nobody with a dead-end job. But she was horny and he was there. Her pussy was raw and swollen. She wanted dick. He had dick.

"I don't even like him!" she protested. "It didn't mean anything. I wanted you, but you weren't there!"

Yet another proof that some TRP theories are wrong, in trying to explain women behaviour in a rational, logic way.

There is no higher motivation behind women actions. They don't always search for a better man. An out of shape loser is still a good deal, in the moment.

You can't find a pattern in chaos. There isn't. Women just do what they please, there aren't "biological needs" or bullshits like that.

There's only one constant in women's history: the lack of evolutionary pressure.

[–]antariusz 1 point2 points  (1 child)

You can't find a pattern in chaos. There isn't. Women just do what they please, there aren't "biological needs" or bullshits like that.

No, TRP is not wrong... This guy has ego-investment in his "big important career" because he thinks it helps him out in life... but TRP teaches us that women will just as likely go for the alpha drug dealer that can get her pregnant as the stable reliable beta boyfriend, even if she gets fucked every day... it's not giving her the real excitement she craved, she was faking it. But the OP did good by avoiding being locked down into a relationship with this post-wall cc rider.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"big important career"

He also has kids to finish raising, apparently. He additionally commented that he's very active in his community - definitely a trait that will polarize sluts of every caliber.

He's not mistaken in achieving status. It's just AWALT in play & not a principle with any reliable outcomes.

[–]kinklianekoff 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it is indeed contradictory to standard AF/BB. TRP theory never claims to explain every behaviour though.

with that said, that drug dealer is unlikely in beta territory and him being without ambition is irrelevant to him being fuckworthy for an unfaithful woman. it isn't unheard of for women to fuck down either, it is simply not the general trend.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yet another proof that some TRP theories are wrong

Hardly. It's pretty well established that a woman's perception of you is highly subjective.

[–]donit -4 points-3 points  (1 child)

Although you didn't create her missing integrity, you did put her into a sexual frenzy by getting her off so many times, and so you left her in an impossible spot.

It's like you gave her that many cigarettes three days in a row, got her addicted, and then suddenly left her without any.

I think the lesson here is don't give a girl orgasms 2-3 days in a row because then it becomes like cigarettes or more accurately- cocaine because it operates in the same region of her brain and makes her desperately addicted to the feeling.

Three days straight of elevated dopamine levels causes her body to overcompensate by not giving her any, and so it leaves her in a situation the next day where she can't get comfortable.

[–]StuffaYouFace 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a ridiculous rationalization. This is some female hamster Level 10 BS. On par with her blaming him for her fucking someone else because he wasn't around. I hope you are being sarcastic.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (11 children)

My question is why is the female's faithfulness important? I have a babymama and she is one horny bitch, I know that I am not around her for a day, it is safe to say that she has been fucked like a blow up doll at least once. Now I could get mad, but I'm busying fucking a 18 year old girl in the back of my truck. Then here is the kicker, when my baby mama and I meet, we fuck again, and the love has not even diminished in the slightest way, she wears high heels and make up for me but I can't imagine the effect of me trying to prison her.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (10 children)

why is the female's faithfulness important

Because she and OP had agreed to it.

[–]nefuratios 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did they really? Did they sit down and say "we both agree this is a monogamous relationship"? I know people automatically assume that a relationship is monogamous bot no one really specifically states that at the beginning.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (8 children)

But why agree on something that humans are not meant to do.

[–]2IVIaskerade -1 points0 points  (7 children)

Monogamy is a naturally occuring product of human sexual interaction.

Humans aren't “meant to" do anything.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (6 children)

Humans are meant to reproduce, make the most number of offspring and thrive in any survival situations. If monogamy was so natural why do I love threesomes and etc and why is that most marriages just don't stick.

[–]2IVIaskerade -1 points0 points  (5 children)

Humans are meant to reproduce

According to what metric?

Evolution and life is directionless. It just is. There is no end goal, no rhyme or reason to it. There is nothing that life is "meant to" do.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Oh from that nihilist perspective then I have to agree with you, nothing means anything. But I like to say fuck it and bust a nut a teenage prom queen and let the wheel of continue through the DNA and let the thousands of years of generations whisper and guiding the next generation. See I like to give my own meaning to my own short life.

[–]2IVIaskerade -1 points0 points  (3 children)

I like to say

Great. However, you must acknowledge that this is a personal opinion.

like to give my own meaning to my own short life.

Good for you. This does not justify your stance in any objective sense, however.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children)

I don't need to, and you can suck my dick if you don't like how i think.

[–]2IVIaskerade 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I don't need to,

Unless you want to be taken seriously, that is.

[–]trowawayyada -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

ZERO FUCKS GIVEN, ALL DAY EVERYDAY

Get tested asap, you are probably ok but shit you never know with these slooooots.

Inbetween "lovemaking". <<< these words shouldn't exist in RP land.

[–]SeekingTheWay 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i think it is mostly used with ironical connotation...

[–]Corndog_Enthusiast -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Sorry dude. I know you've moved past it and accepted it, but it's still a shitty thing to happen. Good luck next time.

[–]ShitsInPringlesCans -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Alright OP, good play, but it seems to me you got a bit lucky there.

First, a cum stain is distinctive - but not THAT distinctive. I mean, I'm not a chemist, are you?

And second, the former being said, what would you have done if she steadfastly denied everything completely and to the end? How does that play out? (This is the real question.)