Reader Mailbag: Surfeit Of Flushed Nethers Edition

This was a good selection of reader questions, mostly because the questions were short and to the point. Lesson: If you want your question featured in CH’s ‘Reader Mailbag’, you’ll have a better shot if it’s tidily under one paragraph in length. (No run-on sentences, please.)

Email #1

Can you talk about circumcision and your thoughts on its effects on the male brain?  My theory is that circumcised men jerk off less and are therefore more productive whereas guys with foreskins have an easy time jerking off (never need to use lube).  I’d love your thoughts on this and possible correlating the decline of America to the decline of American male circumcision.

Circumcision is a barbaric practice, a close cousin of clitoridectomy. Civilized peoples should outlaw it. Instead, it continues to be de rigueur in large swaths of the population. The arguments for it are nonsensical.

1. “It doesn’t affect sexual pleasure”

Yes, it does. The foreskin is loaded with nerve endings and is ranked the most pleasurable part of the penis by men who still have it intact. Removal of the foreskin even reduces women’s sexual pleasure during intercourse.

2. “Circumcision reduces the chance of infection, particularly AIDS”

The persistence of this myth is belied by the available evidence. Even among gay men, for whom circumcision is most recommended as a protection against AIDS and other STDs, the evidence is scant that circumcision provides a protective benefit. Think about this from an evolutionary perspective for a second: if intact foreskin was a high risk for infection, how did it ever evolve? Clearly, the foreskin is not the bogieman some faint-hearted doctors would have you believe.

3. “Women think an uncircumcised penis looks ugly”

First, what women think of the aesthetics of the penis is all over the map. I have heard a thousand different opinions on this subject from women. Second, what does it matter what chicks think of your dong’s look? I’m sure some African tribal chieftains somewhere think girls’ vaginas look ugly with all that labia and clit in the way, so they cut it off. Does that make it right?

The reader does introduce a compelling puzzle. Circumcision likely reduces the sensitivity of the penis head (glans) because the head is exposed to the elements and other sorts of friction on a continual basis, which it would not be if it were sheathed behind foreskin. So it’s interesting to muse whether circumcised men masturbate less than intact men who are more sensitive to every movement their penises make. If so, it could be plausibly argued, as this reader does, that circumcised men divert more of their energies to non-sexual productive pursuits that benefit society.

We’ll call this the Chateau Heartiste® Theory of Circumcision and Civilizational Progress™.

Email #2

I was wondering what your views are about guys that are below average height? How do they overcome the heightist attitude 99% of all women have. One is automatically disqualified as an attractive guy or romantic interest because of shorter stature.

I am 5″8 myself. This might not sound really short, but I live in the Netherlands. The average male height here is over six feet.

Thanks, love your posts.

How do short guys overcome women’s bias for taller men? Hit on shorter women than themselves.

I’m not really kidding. Target selection is an important part of pickup. Screening girls for likelihood of falling under your charms is smart game. If you find yourself surrounded by tall men, go somewhere else.

Of course, it goes without saying that even a handicap like shortness can be overcome with game, but it will be harder for you than it would be for a taller man. Not that I should have to regale you with anecdotes to prove my point, but one of the greatest players I’ve ever known was an unusually short man topping out at around 5’4″. One of his keys to success? He avoided nightclubs where tall men would tower over him, and focused on online pickups. Also, perfect your alpha body language; little things can go a long way to influencing women to overlook your shortness.

By the way, 5’8″ is not that short in the USA. I believe the average male height here is 5’9″, so you would not be working from any major disadvantage if you moved out of the Netherlands. But the Dutch are the tallest people in the world, so your height will be relatively runty there. I suggest a trip to a Congolese pygmy tribe to boost your ego and jumpstart your game. I hope you like chicks who can helicopter and rest a case of beer on their buttocks while standing.

Email #3

Dear Chateau,

With deep and abiding respect, I humbly ask for some help. I am overweight and poor. I think it is the overweight that gets to women more. I simply cannot get a date. I do not have women in my social circle currently, and dating sites are dead to me. I do not wish to be burdened with another man’s devil spawn, so I stay away from the single moms. I am 26 and still a virgin. If you can help me in any other way than berating my sorry ass on your website please let me know. I would be willing to pay you for your time and effort, as much as my paltry salary allows.


Lonely Chubby Man

Dear LCM,

Good news! Your fatness is hurting your love life more than your poverty, but luckily, slimming down is easier than cashing up. I’ll keep it simple: squat, deadlift, bench and work your core three times per week, 30 minutes each session. Run wind sprints every other day in the park until you are out of breath. Reduce your grain and sugar intake by 70%. Substitute with more meat, fish, nuts, berries and vegetables. You should also consider avoiding beer. For the love of god, stay the fuck away from soda.

Nest step: read Le Chateau archives. You will find plenty of game advice, as well as links to other game resources, here. Learning game is as important as, maybe more important than, carving the fat from your obese frame.

Do these two things and I guarantee you will see improvement in your interactions with girls. If you can’t, or won’t, follow these recommendations, then get comfortable living out your years in grinding celibacy. Your willpower depends a lot on how much you truly value getting your dick wet. You’d be surprised how many men value food, sloth, laziness and self-pitying despair more than sexual pleasure with cute chicks.

26 is still young. You have plenty of time to right your ship. Remind yourself of this every day. Better yet, imagine a CH proprietor barking it to you like a constipated drill sergeant. Live one-on-ones are generally avoided by the staff, but if the price is right…

Email #4 (wall of text alert)

Hello, Thanks for your insight on game. Been reading the site the last few weeks. Im 21 girlfriend 20. I went alpha on my girlfriend, agreed and amplified all her shit tests when she wanted to ‘talk’ about how we’d been shaky lately. She got mad saying i dont care about her and that she was going to give a new guy a chance.

One of her texts: “As much as i want you i realize I really dont need you. The beautiful difference bw wants and needs. I’m striving to get over you. It’ll be a challenge but someone will treasure me”. She went on texting me things like this, i replied with lol and told her to send me a sexy picture, basically ignoring her long texts. She then texted “Ask ur other girlfriends for a pic. I’m sure theres a waiting list. Im going to actually give this new guy a chance. This is me being honest. I know you dont give a fuck but no need to hide it.”

i replied with another lol and said i was waiting on the picture. She didnt reply 3 days later(my birthday) she texts me “happy birthday!”. I dont respond, she calls a few hours later saying she wasnt sure if i got her text and wished me happy birthday. I said aloofly ok thanks. She nervously said ok thats all and i hang up.

Then that night she texts me some bs about my mom being funny on facebook “Your mom is soo funny”. I havent replied to it… Overall i think she reacted to my new non caring behavior by threatening me with all her long emotional texts to see if i would bitch up and say sorry like i have for the past 2 years. Im a tall good looking guy and handled our relationship well until recently when i stumbled across this site and realized why she began to withdraw from me a little. Personally i think shes waiting for me to come around and say sorry and try to get in her new graces but i really dont know how to take it from here. How should i reply to these texts? Also i remember reading that when a girl professes how much shes over you and wants to move on shes never been more into you…

So with that said, if ive been playing it right, she’ll come around and say shes made a mistake and that she wants things to be like before and what not. In which case id act aloof, and that its no big deal. Maybe even milk it a little and make her feel real bad. But im thinking it may take a few more days because shes not use to this uncaring reaction out of me. Once she realizes im serious she’ll hopefully be back. What do you think?

How long have you been seeing your “girlfriend”. If she’s saying she wants to “give a new guy a chance” after only two weeks with you, then I think you are dealing with a crazy attention whore slut you’d be better off excising from your life. You can bet pretty good money that when a chick says she wants to give a new guy a chance, she’s already giving a new guy a chance.

I consider words like that from a girlfriend to be either incredibly transparent, blunt force shit tests, or confessions of infidelity. In your case, based on follow-up emails and texts she sent you, it sounds like she’s shit testing and fishing for a jealous reaction from you. She needs to see indicators of commitment (IOC), which you are not giving her.

Her reactions to your aloof alpha game tell me that your replies were on the money. She’s chasing you, and that’s always the better relationship dynamic than the other way around. She doesn’t want to show her hand, though, so she lamely tried to conceal her interest and growing urgency by contacting you through plausibly deniable third parties, as she did when she referenced your mother and, to a lesser extent, your birthday.

(Question for the betas reading: Be honest, how may of you guys tried to reestablish contact with exes by sending them little reminders on their birthdays? Yeah, you tooled yourselves. I hope your dick shrinks when you think on those low points in your lives.)

HOWEVER, I do think you overplayed your hand a bit. All aloof, all the time, makes Jack an unreachable boy. A woman needs to see *some* desire from her man. There’s no need for you to apologize for anything, or to even mention this whole sorry episode in any capacity. Just reach out to her and meet her like you did when times were good. Make some token efforts at beta vulnerability. Deep conversations, eye gazing, a surprise purchase of some small bauble… it doesn’t take much to allay a girl’s fears that you are irrevocably drifting away from her.

Making *her* feel bad for the growing distance is a particularly powerful technique that I would advise only experts at female emotional tinkering should attempt. If you can do that without angering her, go for it. Example: “I’ve been thinking about us lately… (pause)… and your attitude has really made me wonder… (pause)… I dunno, I guess I needed some time to think by myself.”

I’m sure she realizes you’re serious, so you should ease up on the aloofness now. Begin taking the lead again. Let us know how it goes.

Email #5 (from a girl)

I’ve followed your blog for about a year now, and having observed my guy friends and evaluated my own life up till now, I can say that I agree with about 98% of your writing. but I feel like there’s a bit of a conundrum for your average 6/7s; you say alphas are attracted to femininity and girls who “don’t play games”. but 6/7s are often overlooked if the only qualities they possess are such.

also, of course, understandably no guy wants to be chased, as it is fundamentally unfeminine for a girl to chase a man… BUT, for a 6/7 is it possible that initiating the flirting (even with sexual overtones) would actually be productive by subtly seeming more open? I kind of got this from your Betty (9) vs Rachel (7) post.

so do you think 6/7s should initially be more flirty than their hotter friends to at least attract attention, and if not, how do you propose they (attempt to) set themselves above hotter women?

First of all, guys *do* like to be chased. The caveat is that they like it in small doses early on (just enough to let him know that his efforts are not wasted), and in larger doses as a relationship develops (so that his anxieties that you might be a cuckold risk are laid to rest). You are correct, though, in assuming that a girl who chases too much will be undervalued by men as a potential girlfriend and overvalued as a potential one night stand.

6s and 7s pass the cute threshold. If you are a 6 or a 7, you can easily get a solid beta boyfriend as long as your standards aren’t ridiculously inflated and you have the wisdom to know that settling is usually a better option than resigning yourself to pump and dump singleness. Too many women with their useless libtard degrees, $45K HR jobs and muffin tops think they are hot shit who shouldn’t ever have to settle, and these are the kinds of women who end up at 39 like Katie Bolick wondering why they are childless and ignored by the men who used to dump inglorious fucks in them when they were younger hotter tighter.

Good news! You do not sound like one of those women. The very fact that you write here seeking advice suggests that you have a head on your shoulders.

Flirting is a fine art that some women naturally excel at, while other women need to learn from their elders and peers. A 6/7 will be overshadowed by hotter girls, which she can combat in one of three ways:

1. Flirting more openly, as you said

2. Being nicer and more approachable than the hotter girls

3. Studiously avoiding those places where hot women congregate

Number 3 is self-explanatory. Classrooms and house parties are your friend. Nightclubs are not, unless you want an NSA hookup.

Friendly girls with kind demeanors will attract betas like flies to honey. (I would drop the idea that you are going to snag an alpha male for any long term commitment. You should focus on those betas who show sparks of alpha playfulness.) A beta is typically intimidated by 8s and 9s, and put off by their shit tests, so he will gravitate to women more within his purview who don’t give him a hard time. A friendly, non-shit testing 7 with a slender figure is like the holy grail to 70% of the world’s men.

Coyness is a form of flirting, and men love it. But the line between coyness and conspicuous sluttiness is easier to cross than you might think. If you are going to go the “sex it up” route to attract male attention, you had better know what you’re doing. A skirt too short or an eye play too lascivious, and you will get beset by alphas who only see you as a low cost, investment free sexual experiment waiting to happen.

Licking the lips, finger tracing a cocktail glass, crossing and uncrossing legs, smiling a lot, playing with your hair, bright red lipstick, sexy hipster stockings, saying “hi” first, good posture that thrusts the tits outward, high heels that hoist the ass upward, innocent touches on his forearm when he says something interesting… all these flirty expressions are tools of the trade that women over millennia have wielded to capture men’s interest.

I could go on but a full compendium of flirty tricks of the female trade would require a separate post. Bottom line: You aren’t going to outcompete 8s and 9s for alpha male commitment, but you can outcompete 6s and 7s for greater beta commitment. And, if the stars are aligned, you might even best the occasional 8 who has her eyes set on a beta male. A lot of greater betas with options will choose the less stressful, less hot girl for long term love because they don’t have the game nor the guts to keep a hotter girl than they are accustomed to in line.


  1. I’m “short” myself at 5’8″, but I’ve spent plenty of time in LA and can tell you that plenty of models, actors and musicians are shorter but fake it with lifts.

    Posture helps. Being athletic-slim helps. Cut your hair to accentuate your jaw, cheeks, shoulders, etc helps.

    But you don’t need help. Height is another “list of things I demand” item from most women, and few of them ever get 2 of the 100 things they demand.

    Good game will overcome anything. If you think you’re too short, it WILL get to you, and that will throw off your confidence. If your confidence has any failure points, women will read it like a strobe light in a moonless night.

    As for the letter from the gal, point #3 is so important. I tell my female friends who are 5/6/7s not to be hanging out at the bars with the 8/9s unless they want the 2am NSA hookup. The guys leaving the bar with a gal at 2am are settling for whatever is left, because the 9s left at 10pm, the 8s left at midnight, and the 7s were gone by 1am.


    • Near the top of my list of demands is that she knows my cellphone is not a catch-all for her verbal diarrhea. Using my number’s a privilege, not a right.
      Besides, she won’t properly value the time I give her if she feels like she can text me any time she wants. Open up that floodgate and she’ll feel like she can take her time out of another propect’s allotment, and that isn’t fair.


      • I tell pretty much everyone I know that I only have the 300 text message plan, and if they want to keep messaging me, they better back it up with 20 cents per message (includes my response).

        This includes friends, family and clients, too.


      • Likewise, get to the point and keep it simple…. It’s a given that almost 95% of women (probably more) use text as a convo these days.


      • Try this:

        1. She texts you.
        2. You reply, eventually.
        3. She replies, quickly.
        4. You send back “Call me” about an hour later.
        5. Ignore her first call, answer the second even if it’s immediately after the first.

        It’s a great way to get women to stop texting you too often. It drives me crazy when they do.


    • A big face on top of a small body photographs really well. I have a buddy who’s 5’5″ but he has some old acting portraits that make him look like Hercules.

      Whenever someone in LA sees a famous actor going about their normal business, the comment always is how short they actually are. For example, Scarlett Johansson looks like this big breasty vivacious woman in pictures, but in reality she’s a 5’3″ breasty pixie. This kinda permeates the LA mentality, so maybe height isn’t as important there.

      If a shorter guy photographs well, he could do really well online, I would assume.


      • I’ve been at parties with some “famous” people in LA, and the number of guys who lie about their height even in official bios is stunning.

        A famous singer/actor was at a party 2 years ago that a good friend of mine was at. My friend decided to get some photos taken with the guy, who was pretty much exactly my friend’s height. This was a pool party, so everyone was barefoot.

        The side story was another person came up to the celebrity and said “You need to get your shoes on if you’re going to take photos.” 4 inches later, another photo was taken with the guy and my friend, showing a markable height difference.

        6’1″, my ass.


      • My very limited experiences there (had a summer job at a place a lot of celeb-types frequented) are similar to yours…a lot of actors and actresses, famous and aspiring alike, tend to be short people who have nice proportions.

        I think women in LA actually tended to care less about height compared to the people I knew in the other 5 cities where I’ve lived since my teens. As the above poster suggested, maybe it’s the influence of celebrity-worship culture (not just that celebs are short, but a lot of “powerful” people in the city such as agents are short…).


  2. i believe the romans went uncut


  3. #1: Circumcision was pushed in English speaking countries by anti masturbation zealots in the 19th Century. These same morons were advocating regularly brushing young girl’s clits with acid to discourage masturbation, so I guess the guys may have gotten of lightly.

    #3: The problem poor people face in eating properly is that carbs & sugar are the cheapest calories. The required 2000 Calories/day is expensive if it is meat, fruits, and vegetables. Learning to cook can mitigate that somewhat, and the best food for losing weight takes less cooking. Roasted lean meat and simply prepared vegetables are the ticket. Frozen whole chickens and frozen ground turkey are the cheapest meat.

    Here is how to cut up a whole chicken.


    • Well it never stopped me from spanking. Medecine has been partially misguided for most of history. We probably only started helping more than hurting in the last 50 years or so.

      I’ve been circumcised all my life, so I can’t tell the difference. I probably am able to last longer because of it. But I’ve never felt deprived because of it.


      • Medicine- oops. Its also more like the last 100 years, basically when they started trying to sterilize things. The operating scene in the film Elephant Man is pretty wierd to see from a technological standpoint, for instance, but its pretty accurate.


    • “Old Guy” is on the money about the cost of food. If you have to eat carbs because of cost, eat rice. Eat it in small amounts (many small meals is better than one large one). Put butter in the rice for some healthy fat. Look at buying whey protein for an excellent and cheap (for protein, anyway) protein source.


      • Yams and oats are also very cheap.


      • “Yams and oats are also very cheap.”

        And they will make you fat and unhealthy if they are your primary source of calories.

        The diet that will make you thin and healthy is lean meat, vegetables, and fruits. Yams are OK every once and a while, but they are pure carbs and a bit of fiber. They are one of the original crops.


      • “And they will make you fat and unhealthy if they are your primary source of calories.”

        So will the industry “requirement” of 2000 calories — of almost anything but lean meat, seafood and vegetables.

        I go on ~1200, regular amount of activity. Eggs, butter, rice (not more than a cup per day), chicken when I feel like having it, citrus, nuts, water.

        2000 is itself the product of the carbohydrates racket. Easy carbs are easy calories, which is easy money for the companies.

        People will huff & puff about “starvation”; they’re just gluttons unwilling to let the stomach shrink and the mind adjust to caloric deficit. BILLIONS of humans on earth subsist on less than 2000 calories per day. I know, I know, you’re at the gym every day and lift cars over your head like it’s your job, that’s great, eat all you want, but the average rikshaw driver of India isn’t consuming 2000 a day and pulls a wooden cart filled with people all day from the age he’s old enough to clear the handlebars.


  4. NYC checking in.

    I see hot girls with shorter guys (like 5’5”-5’7”), all the time. The short guys always have one thing in common: impeccable body language.


    • Totally agree.

      I’m 5’4″ and I’ve been in LA for a year now. Looking back at my stats I notice something interesting: I have had a much easier time with hotter taller girls than hotter shorter girls. The best theory I can come up with is that a lot of shorter girls (my height and shorter) don’t want to be “stuck” with a shorter guy just because theyyy are short too — this doesn’t happen all of the time but enough for me to notice and wonder. Taller ones tend to see me (and other confident short guys like me) as novelty and a refreshment from your typical LA douchebag.

      And while I’m ranting about LA…I’ll say this. Surprisingly, most guys here are not truly confident. From what I have seen, by the true definition of “man” that we so strenuously discuss, there are plenty here but not as many as I thought there would be. Most guys are all about impressing with material shit and status, so if you have a little game and know the reality of what’s going on with social dynamics, true Game will stand out.

      Just watch out for the herp.


      • Shorter/smaller women are, according to studies, more fertile than taller/larger ones. It’s been suggested that this is because the small women were not able to perform tasks such as gathering, etc. or protect themselves as well as the larger women and therefore they developed into “breeders.”


      • If you buy this you could argue that short women are more likely to seek out protectors (bigger men)?


      • I wouldn’t reconcile that without extensive research.

        More intuitively is that Estrogen inhibits bone growth. The more Estrogen a woman has, the shorter she will be. Psycholigcally she will be more feminine and likely to have wider hips and bigger breasts. Overall I would make that a preferred mate.

        I wouldnt be surprised to hear that estrogen is beneficial to a woman’s fertility either.


      • Just a random observation, but it seems that the smaller the girl, the bigger the orgasm.


      • Not convincing at all. Even if all of that were true in pre-history, it has no application now. However, you’re on the right track by suggesting social factors play a part. – The jist, slightly shorter than average women are more fertile because this is an attraction trigger for males. Shortness is a cue of fertility in women for men.


      • More appealing to men equals more chance of having offspring.


    • I had a girl dump me (6’0”) for a guy 4 inches shorter than her (5’7”), so yeah, height means nothing in the face of game.


  5. “Bottom line: You aren’t going to outcompete 8s and 9s for alpha male commitment, but you can outcompete 6s and 7s for greater beta commitment. ”

    This is solid advice, for any girl that knows she doesn’t have ‘the look’.

    On a side note: There has been some discussion on the father-son relationship here. But I feel the mother-daughter dynamic is under-explored.

    Most mothers tend to be pretty good at giving their daughters realistic advice and often quite candidly point out problem areas.

    Eg mothers will often be the first ones to point out if a girl is getting fat, in a stupid relationship, being a slut, etc.

    Pretty much everyone else will tell the girl pretty lies that make her temporarily feel good but won’t fulfill her in the long term.

    Often the daughter often reacts with anger and dismisses the advice of her mother because it is hard to swallow.

    In our society of extended adolescence, this denial often continues till the girl is well into her 30s at which point it is too late.

    So girls, listen carefully to your mom. She is not a crazy old woman. She cares about you.

    You don’t have to apply all of it, but I can guarantee there are plenty of nuggets of wisdom in there.

    (The mother-son advice is well intended, but doesn’t work because moms can’t relate to what it means to become a man. The son needs to learn not to listen to his mom, before he can become a man.)

    [Heartiste: A boy without a father in his life is a boy at the mercy and whim of his mother’s limited scope of perspective.]


    • I bet an atypically large share of the female readers of this blog, were raised in households where the mother genuinely believed in the feminist projection that traits that attracts men, are very similar to traits that attract women; i.e. a god education, social status, intellectual rigor, perhaps a good job etc. Mothers teaching their daughters to walk well in heels are rare these days. So are mothers suggesting their daughters choose traditional finishing schools, over more outside the home career focused, academic ones.


      • Stuki is correct. The vast majority of my friends’ mothers (I grew up in a large, liberal American city) told them they were beautiful no matter what, and told their daughters they deserved perfect marriages, and so on and so forth.

        I grew up somewhat differently from my peers, in what was an Americanized immigrant household. Academics were important, but so was learning to walk in heels, sew, not complain, and set a table properly. And to take a lot of pride in doing these little things for your family. If I walk in the door and my jacket doesn’t fit perfectly, my mom will probably hem it right there. My grandma, who came from very little to snag a big-time Alpha in the old country (we’re talking Eva-Peron-level), lived with us. You better believe I got tons of criticism from everyone if I came home from college with any weight gain.

        But let’s be honest–while I might have different family values, I’m the same as every other girl. Because it’s not like I still don’t have the same insecurities in dating as any of them, it’s just flipped: “am I doing this right? Why am I single and the girls who react differently and are more demanding/confrontational taken? Do guys really actually want that and I was raised the wrong way?”

        I dunno. You tell me.


      • “am I doing this right? Why am I single and the girls who react differently and are more demanding/confrontational taken?”

        a few possibilities:

        they’re hotter
        they put out more easily
        they’re kinkier


      • They swallow
        They take it up the ass


      • Look for older men. Young guys in their 20s are just draining their balls. They don’t care for femininity as long as the subject is a decent piece of ass.

        I think that’s the root of the problem. Chicks in their 20s should aim at guys in their 30s. Alphas, lesser alphas and even greater betas in their 20s are far from ready to settle, even if they want to.

        I mean, haven’t you seen it? Women complaining why their alpha long-term boyfriends/husbands left them for a young hottie. Well that’s because they’re dumb, and the young hottie is smarter.
        Same-age relationships just don’t work, especially for high caliber men. Because women and men hit their primes at different ages (and women’s looks fade earlier, and men look for looks uber alles, but we all know that).

        I definitely need to read a Chateau/manosphere article about “Gaming your daughter” or something. But I’m damn sure that if I ever get cursed with a daughter, I will lead her to do just that. Getting married in her prime (18-23) with a man in his prime (30-35). And his alphaness should be somehow correlated with her looks.
        To achieve that, you gotta be a badass patriarch. I wonder if one’s daughter would be more influenced with rational talks about male/female dynamics, or just with an authoritarian patriarchal stance. I bet you need them both.

        But why the fuck am I talking about children and oh no, marriage…


      • Haha this almost happened to me. When I was 18-19, a 30 something billionaire playboy (you’d recognize the lastname) wanted to settle down with me. Didn’t happen due to me being too young. That’s okay though, I am not regretting it.


      • You were not “too young”.

        Congratulations, you blew it.


      • Normally, I would say I blew it, but in this case it turned out he beat up his girlfriend a couple years later–badly.


      • Interesting post. I think its because most all of us are wired for families, but the society we have created is hostile to them. As far as how to raise your daughter, I think you have to be a good measure of both and be ready to physically back up no, if need be. Girls are obedient generally, though, and if you talk to your children a lot when they’re young, they will usually listen when they’re teenagers. Gentle ridicule works well, and pointing out their lack of insight in a teasing way is also effective. Its not much different from gaming women, really, just with different objectives.


      • You sound like a good catch to me.


      • Matador is right. A young man won’t really appreciate you, he won’t have learned to yet. Shoot for 10+ years older.


      • Right on, I am currently seeing a 40 year old and it seems pretty promising. Interesting how women his age keep giving me dirty looks.


      • This is probably true. However, put it into perspective, at least they still cared what men thought of them. It’s not entirely hopeless.


    • “(The mother-son advice is well intended, but doesn’t work because moms can’t relate to what it means to become a man. The son needs to learn not to listen to his mom, before he can become a man.)”

      This may be the most important thing ever noticed about male-female and family dynamics, and why it is crucial to have strong male and female guidance as a child, both for the directly applicable (male-male) and complementary (male-female) knowledge each sex needs in order to navigate adolescence and the years beyond.

      Societies with strict and strong marriage traditions know this; even in Biblical times, widowed women were not left to independence; their brothers-in-law became their protectors and fathers to their children, and for good reason. How else can you raise a boy without a man, or a girl without a woman?


    • “Most mothers tend to be pretty good at giving their daughters realistic advice and often quite candidly point out problem areas.

      Eg mothers will often be the first ones to point out if a girl is getting fat, in a stupid relationship, being a slut, etc. ”

      Have NEVER seen this myself and believe it to be fantasy. In my experience, mothers have viewed their blossoming daughters as a threat to their wilting looks and use deception and disinformation regarding the topics you put forward to even the playing field. In addition, the vast majority of women in the west are deluded. Delusion breeds delusion.


      • And you would be right.


      • Southamerican mothers do this all the time.

        You’re getting fat, you should go out and jog more. Your hair has too many split ends, it doesn’t look shinny. You should wear heels, those match better than those converse.

        Those sorts of things are commonplace in my house


      • Tell us more, Guavaberry. I like these South of the Border female field reports.


      • in some cities in south america, this is common practice. i live in bogotá.. it does not happen here, but in other smaller cities is the norm. no wonder why , when small town girls arrived to the capital, they beat the shit of their competition.


  6. Height is the one element of male appearance that matters to girls and all else constant, requires much higher levels of game to compensate

    Having said that, both height and weight problems for men can, in some cases, be due to Lordosis only. Just get your column straight and you get taller and slimmer. The exercises for that are available on the internet and do not require any sort of expensive equipment.


  7. #1: Just worry about your own dick.

    #2: I always see short guys with really short girls, or short guys with really tall girls. So, go for the extremes.

    #3: You are 26 & fat. If you can’t motivate yourself at the young, healthy age of 26, you probably never will. Most likely you’ll be fat & lonely the rest of your life.

    #4: Didn’t read your long-assed text. Stopped at the point where she said she didn’t need you. Find other girls, learn how to fuck better, etc.

    #5: Just put out. Fuck real well & hope for the best.


  8. on December 1, 2011 at 1:57 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM)




  9. on December 1, 2011 at 1:57 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM)




  10. The theory about the relationship of circumcision and HIV is quite interesting. Let me take responsibility by saying I’m not a specialist in this area and so on.

    The foreskin actually contains a rich amount of immune cells (dendritic/Langerhans) at a huge concentration. HIV infects these. That’s where the protective effect against HIV seems to come from.

    However, it may be the case that for other STDs, circumcision may actually increase the chance of their transfer because of the abbreviated immune function. As it happens… the presence of other STDs actually increase the chance of HIV infection, probably because an infection in the area attracts immune cells and so on.

    Circumcision doesn’t impart such a dramatic effect against HIV that it is worth doing it on the individual level in a western civilisation; safer sex practices are much much more effective and must be sufficient. The protective effect is at only about 30% if I remember correctly, which is only worth doing in the context of huge prevalences and ineffective safe sex practices such as in certain parts of Africa.

    Circumcision is only useful as a crappy alternative to safer sex in high HIV prevalence areas.


    • Many of the studies done on circumcision and HIV prevention were done in African nations and did not account for factors involving social shaming, religious proscriptions against pre- or extramarital sex, and a low incidence of HIV in the population at the outset. So, if you study HIV rates amongst those who practice circumcision, and find low rates of infection, you surmise (incorrectly in all likelihood) that it must be the circumcision, and not other cultural or biological factors that cause it.

      Some benefits might include lower rates of certain infections for women (bacterial vaginosis) or UTI in men (rare in any case). But we live in a first world country; our water supply is clean and our fastidiousness in daily grooming rituals practically nullifies this method of disease transmission (for the average person in any case).

      Ancient prescriptions for circumcision were likely the result of a societal need/desire to reduce such infections, which have the potential to render women sterile if untreated, and in any event render unto a woman an unclean and undesirable state.

      If you were born with it, keep it, unless it really causes you physical or psychic pain to have it attached to your body (foreskin, a mole, a sixth finger, whatever).


      • HIV is not the cause of AIDS.
        AIDS is an acquired syndrome from a lifestyle of extreme decadence.
        The AIDS figures of Africa are a sham and a big money earner, actually a gigantic money earner for the drug companies.
        If HIV were the casue of AIDS then we should all have it and be dead by now as was predicted at the time the “virus that causes aids” was first “discovered” – and guys like Majic Johnson would be long dead- Koch Postulates dictate that a killer virus doesn’t give a shit about socio economics groups, life styles, or general health of the parties involved. It will just kill you – i.e Ebola Virus.
        One day the sham of HIV will be exposed.
        Read up on Peter Duesberg & Gary Null – and if you don’t know what Kochs Postulates are might pay to look that up as well.


      • on December 1, 2011 at 8:20 pm (r)Evoluzione

        Chinese physicians as far back as the mind dynasty noted a disease of gay men that looks remarkably like AIDS. Makes one wonder…


      • Just caught a bit on NPR about how the anti-HIV medications are not that effective and the patients are dying prematurely anyway.

        If you remember the AIDS stories back from the early 80s, some queer would be healthy boofing his buddies, and then six weeks later he’d be suddenly wasting away on his deathbed (soon to be followed by his good pals). It’s been speculated there might have been some form of Super-AIDS (GRID?) that tore its way through the promiscuous gay population killing everyone in its path, and it burned out before scientists were able to isolate it.

        Thanks for the pointers, this seems to be a good summary of Duesberg’s argument:


      • Yep – that link is a excellent summary of Duesberg’s hypothesis. The general public are extremely gullible when it comes to people in white coats and a stethoscope.
        The hypothesis that AIDS, which again I repeat is a ‘syndrome” – is caused by a virus is so fundamentally flawed it is laughable.
        HIV as a virus has been with humans since the dawn of time – whatsmore it is a retrovirus and wants to become part of a cell rather than destroy it. HIV isnt ‘stong’ enough to cause a common cold let alone AIDS.
        However – snort coke, shoot heroin, drink bucketloads of alchohol, burn the midnight oil, take amyl (a popular sexual drug with gays) and you will compromise your immune system so severley that you basically destroy your immune system – i.e AIDS – and there need not be any HIV virus present.
        And let me quickly explain the African AIDS stats. If you accept that HIV has been around for eons, you can begin to understand that ergo a larg part of the population has HIV anti-boides and its been like this for millions of years. So 1984 comes around a Robert Gallo announces he has found the “cause” of AIDS as in HIV. So – now, when an African gets TB, Cancer, or just dies of a bad flu – “and” he also has HIV antibodies – he is said to have died of AIDS. If the HIV anitbodies are not present then he is just said to have died from TB, Cancer or whatever and no one gives a shit.
        Now you can see again how the gullible general public then read these stats on the AIDS epidemic in Africa and the HIV hypothesis is further accepted as “the truth” when it is just a total sham.
        i am not saying people shouldnt have safe sex – gonnorhea, syphillis, herpes, and the ever common clamidia are reason enough to wear a raincoat on your dick when it comes to fucking a chick you don’t know much about – enough said there.
        But the only winners out of he AIDS is a virus sham are the drug companies and the millions and billions of dollars they rake in from gullible governments in their search for a drug cure to AIDS.
        A further thing to think about is as is often the case with drugs, that they further compromise an already impaired immune ssytem – so this again is a winner for the drug companies, selling a a drug as a “cure” for AIDS when in reality all it does is make the patient sicker and need to take more of their “drugs”.


      • Yes, yes.

        Africans all have “AIDS”, and all whites have PAS — “Poor African” Syndrome, which causes them to confuse “AIDS” with all African morbidity, or lack of natural foodstuffs with “famine”.


    • This is bullshit. And you’re going to medical school, lol! Look, I was a caregiver for one year, I wanted to do it to broaden my experience. I changed men’s catheters regularly. The uncircumcised men had way more infections than circumcised men. Uncircumcised men have heat trapped on their cocks and this enables smegma/cheese build-up. A catheter infection is no fun let me tell you.


  11. “You’d be surprised how many men value food, sloth, laziness and self-pitying despair more than sexual pleasure with cute chicks.”

    What if I want both?


    • Choose your parents well.


    • You can, I was able to get chicks even when I was overweight. And there are overweight players out there.

      But it’s not the same level of success. When you’re fit and muscular, the bitch shields tend to be lower. And you become addicted to the lifestyle. You feel better, you breathe better, you fuck better…

      And fat is oestrogenic shit, it makes you lazy and depressed.

      I’m not the hyperactive type or anything but I will never get back to the old days. Even junk food now tastes weird. I allow myself cheat meals or days, but I don’t enjoy them as much.
      It’s pretty easy to become addicted to a healthy lifestyle when you know what you’re doing in the kitchen and at the gym, and when the results are showing.


  12. on December 1, 2011 at 2:28 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM)

    hey heartistse it is dedcememebr and the holdiays holy days are upon us

    so i jsut wanated to wish you all da best lzlzlzlzo

    and i think we all know

    dat without da heartistse

    der would be no gbfm lllozozlzlz

    so thanksxkxk 4 letting me post here zlzozolzlzo u are our last best hope for mankididnsns

    and i hope you get lotsa bookdeal you shoud get lostass bookdeialalss lotsas bookedeals as much as your lostsas coakss zzlzlz zozlzlzolzol cockias zlotsa cockas zlozlzlz


    • And Xmas best to you too, good old zlozlzlzer. You’re an extraordinarily gifted comic stylist.

      I’m rarely so charmed by someone with whom I almost entirely disagree.

      And to all a good butthex!


  13. Interesting … you really get e-mails like this?

    “26 is still young. You have plenty of time to right your ship. Remind yourself of this every day. Better yet, imagine a CH proprietor barking it to you like a constipated drill sergeant.”

    And I imagine a CH proprietor barking to me that 26 is not young anymore. I hate these double standards …

    “If you are a 6 or a 7, you can easily get a solid beta boyfriend as long as your standards aren’t ridiculously inflated and you have the wisdom to know that settling is usually a better option than resigning yourself to pump and dump singleness.”

    Can we now define what exactly ‘settling’ is? How does sleeping with a man you settle for looks like? Is it just boring or maybe even painful and disgusting? You close your eyes, clench your teeth and wait for five minutes?


    • Better health, wealth and medicine has prolonged peoples lives. Simultaneously, a more complex economy has delayed the onset of when most people can make an “acceptable” living. The combination of the two, has moved the male role in relationships, that of foraging resources from the external environment, from the 18-45 age group, to the 30-70.

      At the same time, the female fertility window has not changed nearly as much. Perhaps from 15-35, to 15-40.

      Hence, while once a 3-5 year age difference was perhaps the ideal combination for giving ones children the best of both female fertility and male resource provision, now it is likely more like 15 years.

      A 26 yo female, is therefore 5-8 years past her prime, while a 26yo male is 2-10 years away from it.

      Settling means focusing on the 90% of the time your equal SMV girlfriends are alone, rather than the 10% they may come dragging with some alpha who may seem momentarily more exciting than your own 100% Beau.


    • How long have you been trolling around this site? Obviously nothing that is written here is sinking in with you. There aren’t double standards. That infers that you’re judging the same thing. A 26 year old man is different than a 26 year old woman.

      That being said, stop feeling sorry for yourself. I know you’ve got that sob story you remind us all of every other day or so, but no one has ever said that a 26 year old girl is screwed. Assuming you aren’t disgusting and can deal with this myopic need for attention, you can attract a man that you will enjoy having sex with. I don’t know why I even took the time to write this


    • how many facetube orbiters do you have?


    • Maya, you get married to the highest bidder right away or you are fucked. Easy enough for you?


    • “And I imagine a CH proprietor barking to me that 26 is not young anymore. I hate these double standards …”

      Beyond a double standard it is a fact of life. Men and women are not the same. We are not all equal.

      Maya, you come across as an unhappy woman. You’ll be much better served spending your time searching for a successful man 15 years your senior and accentuating your feminine side around him than WHATEVER it is you are doing here. You do not have as much time as men. With every hour wasted posting here you are moving one step away from finding a suitable man.


      • Isn’t that obvious, she’s in love with Heartiste. And I think she’s doomed. Heartiste’s words are having the same effect on her as a big alpha cock.

        She’s wasting her prime on a specific kind of cock carousel. And even if she finds a husband, he won’t stand a chance compared to what Heartiste is doing to her little hamster.

        She won’t settle for less than Heartiste, and that’s so sad.
        But I like sentimental tragedies.


    • “There aren’t double standards. That infers that you’re judging the same thing. A 26 year old man is different than a 26 year old woman.”

      Yeah, you’re right, there are no double standards. Now I don’t know why I wrote that comment.

      “With every hour wasted posting here you are moving one step away from finding a suitable man.”

      Fuck, I know. But I’m so anxious. I can’t sleep at night because of this constant anxiety. I’m really sad that I fucked everything up, forever. I should have been thinking about this 10 years ago, now it’s too late.


      • I’m really sad that I fucked everything up, forever

        ‘fucked’? you’re still fucking everything up even now. for example, as you wrote in the next reply:

        I need to fall in love with someone and he has to fall in love with me, otherwise it’s not going to work.

        you’ve black flagged yourself before even starting the race with this fairy tale notion of falling in love.


    • “… you can attract a man that you will enjoy having sex with …”

      I don’t think so. This is very difficult. I need to fall in love with someone and he has to fall in love with me, otherwise it’s not going to work.


      • You are a brilliant troll. Really, your work here is stunning. 10/10 on nuance alone.


      • If you’re 26, you’ve fucked nothing up. You will find many 40 year old successful high-dominance men who are looking for a girl in your age bracket. They’ll fall for your looks and youth, you for their status, poise and ability to lead men.

        You’re only fucked if you are hideous.


  14. I could go on but a full compendium of flirty tricks of the female trade would require a separate post. Bottom line: You aren’t going to outcompete 8s and 9s for alpha male commitment, but you can outcompete 6s and 7s for greater beta commitment. And, if the stars are aligned, you might even best the occasional 8 who has her eyes set on a beta male.
    I would put stress on age. She should snap a man when young. With current dating scene, she does not even have to be 6 to get a greater beta. Just do not be bitchy, be feminine and family oriented.


  15. Hi. I’m a new staff writer at ForbesWoman, where I blog at the intersection of global feminism and Millennial Masculinity. Please stop by and read my maiden essay so I can get “page clicks” towards my annual Encorpera performance review :


  16. 4. Heartiste: How do you convey that you are interested without coming across as a needy, beta dork, completely incongruent with the aloof asshole you were projecting? I would love to see a post expanding on this concept.

    [Heartiste: Short answer: nonverbally.
    Longer answer: she’s going to be able to infer your interest when you move the seduction forward by bouncing venues, getting numbers, and announcing meetup times and dates.]

    Playing aloof and cocky/funny is easy. Where I struggle, and I think a lot of men struggle, is converting a girl’s initial attraction into the comfort that leads to a suggestive touch or kiss. Heartiste has advised before that it is important to project some degree of attainability to the target. It’s just a lot easier said than done.

    [Projecting attainability without neediness: “You know, you’re really starting to grow on me.”]

    I would like to hear Heartiste’s definition distinguishing effective comfort-building indicators of interest towards the girl versus lame, gay, beta behavior.

    [Phew, big question. Too many avenues to explore in a comment. Refer to archives.]

    5. To the girl writing in: i’m the greater beta/lessor alpha the author is talking about. If you’re a 6, become a 7. While I’d do a 6, maybe even regularly, I’m not going to commit to a 6. 7 is the magic number. I agree with Heartiste. I’d be happier with a feminine, cool, smart 7 than a dumb, annoying 8. 7 is the promised land. Get there.


    • “You know, you’re really starting to grow on me.”

      Are you envisioning something like this being said in close, as you’re escalating kino for a kiss? Or something said confidently in passing, at an arm’s length distance, with solid eye contact and a smirk?

      [Heartiste: Comfort stage. Under traditional MM, it would be C3. I say it up close, when we are sitting near each other and swapping personal anecdotes. I suppose it could be used as an early game quasi-neg, as well, with all its implicit assumptions that you weren’t immediately taken with her.]


      • Use this kind of statement after you’ve successfully flipped the interaction to her chasing you. When she has been demonstrating interest in you and you like her vibe, her personality. After she has just said something you liked, reward her with this kind of a statement. Also, I think it’s good that the statement implies not liking something about her. Another example, a more blatant, flirty neg, “I like that. You are actually pretty [cool/smart/funny/whatever] despite your [boots/haircut/career/hometown/whatever]”

        I’m sure I’ve said it before, but the biggest improvement to my game that I learned here was how to be the prize, make her chase, make her qualify.


      • A somewhat different take maybe, but pretty close.

        I used to be a kino guy at this point, but am using it less. I think if it helps the vibe and you are good at it, go for it like pressing elbows or whatever, but you should probably leave it out at first especially if it’s day gaming.

        Negs are usually very early. You’re disagreeing over stupid stuff and qualifying her. Some puas will go c&f tone, probably more funny depending on her level of acceptance. Others take a more serious approach at this point in order to sell the fact that he isn’t won over. You probably stay a little serious at this point if you are trying to go with aloof game. It’s more of a tease than a neg. She’s starting to win you over, but you are not quite there yet as you are still a challenge.

        This is the point where you have already been talking silly free-flow nonsense with her for a while and now she is doing most of the talking; your energy is lower as she ramps hers up in an attempt to win your favor. Alpha body language and sexual/dominant eye contact are key. You are still giving out attraction such as chick crack and are bringing her to a point where she will accept a date with you where you bounce her to another location, preferably asap if not on a second day. You don’t start with all the deep rapport, heavy comfort until the date vs phone call/text (more advanced skills I would say).


  17. on December 1, 2011 at 3:00 pm Artful Dodger

    “A lot of greater betas with options will choose the less stressful, less hot girl for long term love because they don’t have the game nor the guts to keep a hotter girl than they are accustomed to in line.”

    I think a lot of alphas will do the same. A woman you’re going to commit to needs to be a woman you can trust. Unfortunately most women, especially the hottest women, are f-ed in the head. Many guys will find life much easier by having a 6/7 GF or wife while banging 8s on the sly.


    • A buddy of mine who was a great ‘natural’ back in his dating days married a sweet skinny seven. It surprised me at the time because some of the girls he was with were just jawdroppingly beautiful and she was so … ordinary. Well, he couldn’t be happier, says they still screw like crazy, and I don’t think she’s put on a pound.


      • While those flawed studies say men are happier when they marry more attractive than themselves, it goes without saying that partnering with a woman below you is a good idea. A 6 would cling on to a high status man for dear life and never let go. This being the ideal practice for marriage is likely why dowries have been so prevalent through history. Dads are willing to throw anything down for the chance of their daughters marrying up.


      • Its certainly easier to maintain hand in a relationship if you’re dating down. However, one of the endearing aspects of a beautiful woman is her vanity. As this blog said once, in marriage you are purchasing a depreciating asset, but you can still buy the BMW versus the Chevy. A 7+ is far more likely to maintain her figure and other charms, in my opinion, versus a woman who was marginal to begin with.


      • You make a good point. Though the maintenance aspect will depend on the particular woman’s mindset and the dynamic of a relationship. There are a lot of pretty girls who are careless with their appearance and a 6 with a high status male may experience the constant need to style herself well in fear of her man straying.

        Also, it is worth acknowledging that in the Anglo-Saxon West few women – even the young ones – give two shits about their appearance. They’re willing to step out in jeans, crocs and t-shirts at all times. Also, no matter the girl, a one or a ten will look shit at 60. This puts an adoring girl as primary fpcus for marriage.


      • Because I’m an alpha trapped in a beta’s life, I recognize that I can’t score at all except with truly voracious sluts and will be a reproductive failure in the long run (already 30 years old).

        When I look at females now it is with dead cold objectivity, so I find myself looking past their present state at abstract things like how they will look at 60, how many children their hips might bear, and especially how their mothers look. Also, will their conversation, or lack of it, engage me ten years on, or will I want to murder them just to shut them up?

        Men desirous of marriage ought to keep these foremost in mind.


      • I bet it was just to get the bitch out of the house.


  18. on December 1, 2011 at 3:12 pm Artful Dodger

    “A friendly, non-shit testing 7 with a slender figure is like the holy grail to 70% of the world’s men.”

    Isn’t it funny that most men would be GLAD to have a 7. Just a 7. Why are we so much more realistic than women? I bet 70% of the world’s women EXPECT to have a man who’s AT LEAST six feet tall with a six-figure income and strong game. That’s why they’re so disappointed when they get the 5’10 engineer with a likeable personality. They “deserve” better.


    • You mean 70% of the US and Western European women want 6 feet and six figure incomes. The rest of the world, women are fine settling with a beta provider. You don’t see women pining for 6 feet alphas in the Middle East, Asia, or Africa.


      • Could you expand your thesis with Africa?
        Do you mean some long-time ago christianized or islamized nations? Or patriarchal tribes?
        Some parts of Africa are as promiscuous as the West.


      • Some parts of Africa are as promiscuous as the West.

        O RLY??


  19. Sensitive foreskins just lead to beta love making. Circumcision means fucking. Muslims are alpha, and the hardcore black Muslim converts that come out of prison insist their virility is as good as ever if not better.


    • Bullshit and madness! From a personal perspective, I fuck like Jack the Ripper and go at 100 thrusts per minute. The circumsised should realise they have been butchered by a barbaric system and opt for cosmetic surgery to rectify it. Search for case studies. The men who have had it done report a greater feeling of pleasure.


  20. Mom “hates” to be known as a Mom instead of an enlightened and professional woman.


  21. To women who are unhappy with their dating situation, my advice usually is to remember the “half his age plus seven” rule and date older. Your relative youthfulness is a +1 for most guys, and you’ll be able to land a higher status man more interested in settling down.


  22. Girl in #5 — everything Heartiste said is solid advice, I also agree with trying to get yourself to a 7. Long, healthy looking hair and a nice ass go a long way. If you have a slim figure and you wear clothes that flatter your figure (non-slutty), you will get noticed. Don’t have a nice ass? You can have one if you are willing to work. Start doing squats like the men do them. Deadlifts wouldn’t hurt either. Another thing anyone can do is improve their voice. Trust me, men respond to a woman with a sexy voice, and it can be learned.


    • Long hair and a nice ass go a long way.

      No woman has ever uttered words truer.


      • Re-reading this, I can see why you thought a woman wrote it, because of the way I framed it for a woman, but a woman cannot be a flahute. Google it.


      • @Flahute,

        Duly googled and grasped. Interesting word for an interesting bunch.

        And you’re still right about long hair and a sweet ass. Should’ve known it was a man, to see such simple things so accurately.


  23. Thank you for answering my email. Mine was #2.

    It makes sense to narrow down targets to women shorter than me (5″8 and less). But in the Netherlands it is not just the dudes that are tall, the entire native population is tall. My genes are only 50% Dutch. Most women I meet are 5″6 and taller. And they like wearing heels which makes them taller then me. This narrows down the pool of potential women to a pretty small size.

    It is one thing for a woman to choose a shorter guy (e.g. average height) over a tall guy, but choosing a guy that is actually shorter then her is somewhat of an impossibility. Also I am starting to believe: although she herself might not mind dating a guy who is short. She is more concerned what her friends and people on the street might think when they see them together (women don’t buy expensive shoes to impress guys, but to make her girl-friends jealous). Online dating does not work, because they put all search filters on 6 feet plus.

    I agree that gaming outside of nightlife is the way to go. Every variable is stacked against shot guys in such venues.


    • Here is something I have tried a couple of times lately, now that I think about it, probably will more now. If you have tall guys around you, try to get the guy to exhibit supplication and beta body language. I have not used any routines for this because I don’t know of any, but just on the fly like making him qualify himself to me. I’m not really overly aggressive or sarcastic, but do display a lot of positive energy when I do this.

      I had a guy basically my height which is like 5’5″ AMOG me by ignoring me during a church social event with the singles group in front of the babes of the group. Like 2 seconds later some guy asked for help with some chairs or something (probably another AMOG). I left the set and grabbed a bunch of chairs like I was one-upping him, but was smooth about it, so it didn’t look like I cared (like I was up for the work). He followed suit. I won. If he would have stayed pat and kept pmpn he would been fine I think, but a lot of guys don’t care about girls as much as they do their homo pride.


    • Good to read im not the only dutch guy reading this blog. Pure gold, I never mis an article.

      I think the information on this blog is not always suited for West-Europeans (for instance, we do not have a lot of obese women here) but the whole idea of “game” is pretty universal and gave me great benefits in my town, .

      Your problem: I think being not as tall as the average guy in the Netherlands is not such a big problem, and maybe even an advantage.A lot of dutch guys are so tall they become a bit like Goofy from the Disney Cartoons. A bit to slow, a very non-athletic attitude and clothes does not look as good as it does on smaller people (like you). If you work out a little and start to look a bit muscular you will have no problem finding women.

      Greetings from the Netherlands 😉

      [Heartiste: This is actually a really good point. The advantages of height diminish rapidly beyond a certain ideal. And I’ve noticed that shorter men can often look a lot more stylish than tall men because clothes drape on them better. Or maybe it’s because shorter men, with their lower center of gravities, have more fluid and graceful motions, and so their body language and the way they present themselves is more suggestive to women of a sexual proficiency in bed.]


      • yeah, im a really tall guy (just under 6’5) and for the longest time i struggled with bad posture (mostly the difficulty of aligning a long torso and keeping large shoulders back).

        any bad posture is amplified in tall guys. and height w bad posture is much worse than shortness with mediocre posture, as far as i could tell.


    • freezz and heartsie made some very good points.

      own your shortcomings, turn them to your advantage. think contrast game. every other guy is tall and gangly, you’re the short bruiser. if you pull this off with confidence rather than self-consciousness, women will be attracted.


    • Bolkie –

      I was over at the dam last saturday for the first time with a big group of lads. I’m 5 8″ and I pulled this dutch chick as we were trying to get across the river to get to the awakening. She was shorter than me and wasn’t wearing heels so that helped. I’ve also been out with a girl who was 5 10″ with no heels. Definately harder to game chicks who are near my height though.

      I’ve read in a science mag that dutch people are quite tall because of the way they ride bicycles. The u-shaped handlebars allow you to sit up straight with a good posture. But then again that could just be coincidence.

      As for the cirmuncision, I’ve had it done with my entire family and friends watching it as I had it cut off (big ceremony)!! I never had a wank when it was intact so I wouldn’t know whether it’s more sensitive or not to have it. Using johnnys never help. Girls are always curious when they see my dick because it’s different just like american chicks think I’m different with my brit accent. I’m a minority in that sense.


  24. Circumcision is virtually unheard of in Scandinavian countries and the incidence of female to male HIV transmission (which is the only relevant issue) is nearly zero. That is the unanswerable challenge to great enthusiasm for the practice.
    For what it is worth, religion based circs have not always required the actual removal of the visible foreskin. The ritual only requires a trim.
    In the ancient world, athletes competed buck nekkid. Jewish guys could often “pass” because they had enough skin left to pull over
    I do not know about circs and civilization. A lot of hopeless tribes in shit-hole-land practice it.


    • When a man is healthy, foreskin bodes no ill. However, when a man gets sick , foreskin traps bacteria and permits no escape; the glans become a simmering pot of fungal matter.


  25. Are you fucking kidding me? The foreskin has nerve endings? I mean, I love my cut penis, but I thought I was just missing out on some disgusting vestigial skin. That fucking sucks, I’m not even jewish.


  26. “Be honest, how may of you guys tried to reestablish contact with exes by sending them little reminders on their birthdays?”

    Ha, once, in my more beta/afc days, I got the urge to do this. Her birthday was around 3 months after the “breakup.” (Wasn’t even a real relationship.) I even considered anonymously sending flowers to her office – how pathetic can you get.

    But deep down, I knew that would be self-defeating. Instead, on her birthday, I went for a long walk. It was a sunny day and I enjoyed myself. Sure, I thought of her, but I kept my phone in my pocket and just tried to think of other things and enjoy life. (I wasn’t in the mood to make approaches.)

    That was a great feeling, getting through that day and staying silent. Especially since I think she had the typical expectation that we would stay “friends” (i.e. I’d be her orbiter).

    There was another time – different girl – where I had the same impulse. I bought a card, wrote something in it, and then kept it at my desk. Hours later I read it over and realized how stupid it sounded. In the trash it went.

    Point is, I think deep down, every struggling beta knows what the right thing to do is. Just a lot of conditioning to short-circuit. But the real programming is locked somewhere deep and if you listen, it’ll tell you the right thing to do.


    • “Be honest, how may of you guys tried to reestablish contact with exes by sending them little reminders on their birthdays?”

      Have not said one word to my ex since Easter Sunday 2006.
      I wouldn’t piss in her mouth if her teeth were on fire.


  27. “Think about this from an evolutionary perspective for a second: if intact foreskin was a high risk for infection, how did it ever evolve? Clearly, the foreskin is not the bogieman some faint-hearted doctors would have you believe.”

    First, I agree strongly with your anti-circumcision position, but nature is rife with examples of adaptations that are bad for the individual, but good for his reproductive success, which is all evolution cares about (see giant Elk horns, which lead to much greater predation upon males than females). If a foreskin somehow led to more fornication and reproduction among males, that may well offset its life-shortening effects (not that I believe there are any).

    [Heartiste: True, but the penis is so integral to reproductive fitness that it seems unlikely that an adaptation which resulted in an increased chance of constant infections to that critical organ would survive very long in the general population.]


    • on December 1, 2011 at 8:17 pm (r)Evoluzione

      Re: Elk & predation–FC, you’re wrong in example, and wrong in general theory, re: natural selection. First: example: It’s rare for a single predator to take out a male elk. The racks are a giant set of battering rams to punish competing males & predators alike. In addition, the gigantic T levels needed to sprout such appendages lead the bulls to fight & fuck like champs. Which is why it’s a resounding evolutionary success.

      Trophy hunters prize bull elk exactly because they’re hard to kill.

      Secondly, so-called maladaptive traits, or overspecialization, rarely develops in isolation. It happens when environmental changes outpace genetic adaptation. Shifting climate, the intrusion of new species, etc, are usually at the root of overspecialization rather than sheer overdevelopment through sexual selection.

      The foreskin thing has been covered enough, heh. It’s adaptive useful, and its original use was to CONTROL & REDUCE MALE SEXUALITY. The cleanliness excuse is a flimsy cover.


      • I am not quite sure we are talking about the same thing – l have seen several studies that note higher predation on male deeer species that bear outsized horns – for example:

        Of course the horns allow them to reproduce so long as they are larger relative to other males, but if you halved the size of all elk antlers, you wouldn’t change the hierarchical reproduction of the males, but all would have an easier life. Large antlers absolutely aren’t what you need, you need ones larger than your rivals.

        There are plenty of maladaptive traits from an individual point of view that lead to reproduction (is it good for male orb weaver spiders to be eaten?) The expendability of males is the rule of nature.

        Male deer species are hard to kill because you aren’t allowed to kill females – eggs are expensive, sperm are cheap, so you can cull males with abandon and not effect the species population, just some lucky sap might move up in the pecking order of mating when you blast away a rival.


  28. How much do you want to bet that this guy “dumpster dives” when it comes to pussy also?


  29. Some reduction in penile sensitivity might be a good thing. You can last longer. You’re less overwhelmed and more calculating.

    As for female pleasure reduction, it seems to be a move away from low-friction sex and towards the cat spines raking the vagina direction. But that direction has its advantages. Tearing up a woman’s pussy, I mean.

    For one thing, if the bitch is sore she can’t cheat.


  30. For E-mail #3, I don’t think it’s really his weight that’s hurting his chances with women, but rather the complete insecurity he feels about it. Men can overcome any physical deformity with tight enough game. I’d tell him to focus on his inner game, as losing weight won’t make any difference with women if he’s still insecure with himself afterward. Just look through our pop culture to see plenty of fat guys who are still charismatic and clean up with women. Hell, even Manuel Uribe managed to marry a decent 6. Peter Griffin said it best: “Men aren’t fat. Only fat women are fat.”

    The writer also seems entitled to certain girls, as he says he stays away from the single moms. You don’t have to be burdened with another man’s devil spawn just to pump and dump them. I’d also recommend he take whatever he can get with women now, and parlay that into getting hotter women after using the uglier women to boost his confidence. Roosh had a very great post recently about playing the bell curve like this.


  31. alpha aloof = lame. It is a weak game of the mind and may attract a certain type of woman but it will ultimately leave you empty…


    • Fortunately that “certain type of women” is nearly all members of the class “hot women”.


    • I agree. Alpha aloof is boring, I like to be entertained by his wit.


      • This is all so absurd.

        Pretend to be aloof.

        Pretend to be witty.

        Pretend, pretend, pretend, pretend.

        My head hurts all the time.

        Sometimes I like to just sit in the grass and watch trees sway.

        The other day I watched a male snowy egret daintily pick up a piece of my grapefruit his flock had rejected, bring it down to the pond, drop it in and take it back up — clean of dirt.

        Then I walked home. On the way I found a swarm of honeybees in the nook of a forked tree buzzing about sap or something. It suddenly occurred to me that if I approached them without threat, they would respond in kind. I stuck my hand straight into the swarm, and they flew around it, some landing to inspect the great foreign object.


  32. On the height – try to fly to 2nd tier cities in eastern europe south of Warsaw as much as possible.

    Being very assertive and persistent with opening will help a lot domestically – remember – it’s a numbers game. Unlike poker or baseball, though, your number of chances to play are almost entirely up to you. If the tall guy gets hits 10% of the time and you only do it 3.33% of the time, hit on 3 times many girls. I know it sucks, but at least the possibility is there.

    I used to hang out in Toronto and Ontario in general before I knew game, and it sucked due to my being 5’11” and all the guys being 6’2″+ and the girls being low quality. After I learned game and got better at approaches, I could at least get girls to talk to me when I visited. I suspect that I could start landing girls if I was there long enough.


    • 5’11 is fine, you’re taller than 95% of girls (and maybe 80% of guys?). Height doesn’t even matter in the 5’10-6’1 range. You’re above average and almost tallish. Height isn’t even worth mentioning.

      Height could only be an issue for those below 5’8 (wearing lifts is almost mandatory there). But average and above average guys look pretty much the same. Girls are sensitive about height but not that sensitive.

      I’m 6’0 and I wasn’t even self-conscious about it until very recently. I think no one should even care. It’s like looking for excuses, it’s very bad for inner game.

      I mean it’s cool to be 6’3, but it’s also cool to be a big dick handsome billionaire. Everything’s cool but it has nothing to do with game.


      • I disagree somewhat. Maybe this is true initially, but being short is easy rapport with shorter women and taller girls just think you have more balls. Also you do have to lean as much to hear.


  33. ““Women think an uncircumcised penis looks ugly”

    When it’s shoved up her ass, unless her head is up there with it, how’s she going to see it? Wait. Check that. Never mind.


  34. on December 1, 2011 at 7:46 pm someguyontheinternet

    Ah, cold, fresh truth. This blog is a fucking oasis.


  35. If circumcision causes less feeling on the johnson, does that mean a man will pound away longer if he is circumcized?


  36. on December 1, 2011 at 8:49 pm So, Do the Zonk

    “A friendly, non-shit testing 7 with a slender figure is like the holy grail to 70% of the world’s men.”

    Classic. Very true. I married one.

    Looking back, I see all the Beta guys dug her, but I was like the senior Beta.

    Be a champion in your own category.

    I suppose I could worked very hard to bone a 9 and then been worried about her ditching me all the time.

    Nah. This works fine.


    • idk, its kind of like, better to have had a 9 and lost, or better to never have had a 9 at all?


      • on December 2, 2011 at 10:33 am So, Do the Zonk

        Only you know your own subjective utility function, including your risk tolerance. A 7 who really likes you can be a lot of fun in the sack. But, maybe having the 9 is so awesome it is worth the tradeoff of a pleasant and stress free LTR. I don’t know. Report back if you find out.


  37. Nice post blogger but I think you meant “purlieu” rather than “purview.” Both are words, but the former, I think, is more representative of what you were trying to get across.


  38. “Women think an uncircumcised dong is ugly”.

    If she cares that much about it, just pull down the foreskin.


  39. circumcision == Jew/Muslim practice. All Jews and Muslims are circumcized as a religious duty (barbaric religions both).

    No one outside of Jew/Muslim practices it.

    [Heartiste: That’s not true.]

    Historically, introduced by Jewish doctors in the US to prevent Jews from “standing out” from the rest of the population (since the thinking went, the rest of the population is also circumcised).

    [I thought it was for religious purification reasons?]

    Any talk of health benefits are retarded, it’s like saying cut off one lung to reduce your chances of lung cancer by 50%.

    [People who look at this issue with a nonreligious perspective can’t help but recoil at the barbarity and uselessness of circumcision.]


    • No one outside of Jew/Muslim practices it.

      [Heartiste: That’s not true.]

      Counter examples ? Except the USA of course (see the introduction, population standing out reason above)…

      [Heartiste: OK, that qualifier is important.]

      except for the USA and some possible insignifant tribal outliers, there is *no* other country on the planet today where anyone who is NOT a Jew/Muslim is circumcised.


    • on December 1, 2011 at 11:57 pm 1st time caller

      I’m not jewish and i was cut.


    • Supposedly, in the mid-late 1970s, up to 90% of boys born in the UK had to undergo this procedure, no matter what their religion. No idea what the figures are like now. It’s a generational marker as much as it is a religious marker.


  40. “I don’t think it’s really his weight that’s hurting his chances with women, but rather the complete insecurity he feels about it.”

    Yeah, but weight is differnt than other physical deformities because you can do something about it, and everybody knows it. So obese people generally cant “inner game it away”. Best plan is to lose the weight.


  41. For those men who want to get back some of the sensitivity and function lost from circumcision I HIGHLY recommend foreskin restoration. I’m only partway done and I already notice sex and masturbation to be looser and BETTER.

    Check it out:

    Warning – Second website has before and after pictures of a restored penis.


  42. As to being short: Game trumps all. Its been said a million times on this blog, but its true.

    Something I’ve noticed is that the hottest women are more likely to go for a confident, short guy. Its usually the average-to-plain looking women who are the most averse to shortness. Not sure why this is, but maybe its because average women are so desperate breed their looks up.


  43. “It is one thing for a woman to choose a shorter guy (e.g. average height) over a tall guy, but choosing a guy that is actually shorter then her is somewhat of an impossibility.”

    Its possible, but the man has to have extraodinary status. Think Joe Pesci.


  44. Circumcision = physical (as opposed to fiat) branding of goyim (cattle).


  45. Licking the lips, finger tracing a cocktail glass, crossing and uncrossing legs, smiling a lot, playing with your hair, bright red lipstick, sexy hipster stockings, saying “hi” first, good posture that thrusts the tits outward, high heels that hoist the ass upward, innocent touches on his forearm when he says something interesting… all these flirty expressions are tools of the trade that women over millennia have wielded to capture men’s interest.

    I’m reminded of the opera house scene in Woody Allen’s “Love and Death.”

    If you want to meet a guy, just walk up to him and say “hello, you look interesting.” Just saw a young woman do this at the local corporate franchise coffee bar. Works most of the time.


  46. A lot of other men I know base their confidence on their height. There are so many twits in my accounting firm who cheat their height by wearing thick soled shoes. I mean come on, we are not stupid, morons. You are NOT tall, and we all know it. Prancing around with your fake confidence makes you look like an idiot.

    What’s even more pathetic is when they come up and talk to you lifting up their chin exaggerating their height even more. I just look at them with pity.

    Guys with real confidence don’t need to prove themselves to anyone. Take note.


  47. on December 2, 2011 at 2:17 am Ozonator Narcosalla

    I am white. I was circumcised in my mid twenties. I love sex, and I experienced no diminishing of sexual pleasure, no shortening of lovemaking.

    I had a black “friend” from the left wing political activist scene. She would confidently speak up and tell any white person she could find, how racist they were. Whenever any white “comrades” had a child, she wept and wailed, how stupid we were, to bring a child into such a horrible world! But when her own children had children, she was all smiles.

    Anyhow, back to circumcision. When I was circumcised, she also wept and wailed. She said, “don’t you know? that is what makes men fuck like crazy and have lots of babies! It makes you unstoppable!”


  48. on December 2, 2011 at 2:20 am Ozonator Narcosalla

    My friend was presumably experienced; she had 8 children by 5 different men. Her last husband was a Jew half her age. I finally realized she was in a relationship with him, not out of love. It was to keep him from breeding! As usual in these cases, guess who got the better end of the stick in the end.



    “Q: May I play devil’s advocate and ask why then are so many women seemingly charmed by jerks?

    A: Often, it’s a function of one’s personal psychology. Much of that kind of attraction has to do with being drawn to what hasn’t yet been worked out from someone’s childhood wounds or painful experiences. People are often attracted to the very thing that will bring up their old issues; it’s the wisdom of the unconscious pushing us to confront the things that need to be addressed and healed in our personal lives. In this case, the old “it’s not you, it’s me” excuse actually does come into play quite a bit. ”
    Chelsea Kaplan


  50. OT but Ginger White, Cain’s new accuser, is a great example of how not to get into LTRs with American women.

    She had no business betraying him like that.


  51. To #4:
    You are doing fine. She will come around. Once you start hearing “you make me feel insecure” or “i feel so small when being with you”, you will know you reached your goal.
    You might even take the jealousy experiment a step further by making explicit remarks about another girl. Before you know she will be at your feet again.
    That’s how you keep the hotties at bay and around you. And guess what: they love it and they feel “more like a real woman”.


    • We’ve been together 2 years. Yea since then i havent answered her calls. She has called almost every night for the past week… I think if i hold off enough she’ll send that text clearly stating her true intentions.
      This happened a few months ago but on a smaller scale as she said ‘i guess we’re over’ after i paid no attention to her whining shit tests. I said ok and she contacted me for a few days straight and even showed up to my dorm, all the while i remained aloof happy and unaffected. Then after about a week of that i said ‘leave me alone we’re done’. She then rushed to say how we’d been together so long and all this lovey dovey crap. Then we were good. So idk if this is a situation like that and if i were to text her saying stop calling me shed profess her feelings. I think ignoring her till she absolutely needs me is the best method. CH suggested giving her an indicator of commitment but shes the one who started this and i feel i should remain aloof. But idk im leaning towards answering her next call but i already know shes going to beat around the bush.. BTW dont think im pressed on this im just using it as a learning experience for later in life ive been seeing other girls in the mean time.


  52. Ultimately, I don’t care what other people do with their children, but at worst, circumcision is barbaric (although I don’t really think that is the intent, and those who circumcise are likely too dumb to realize the barbaric nature of it) and at best they’re dumb if for no other reason than blindly following their doctors. Making a permanent and irreversible decision for another individual takes a certain level of arrogance. Ignoring those who circumcise for religious reasons, I’d hope that for the remaining secular circumcisions, at least it was the male who made the decision (even though it still sucks), but since there are sooo many single moms according to your post, and circumcision rates are still around 70% in the U.S., it seems like an awful lot of females making these decisions…but I’m now googling links that put the rate at less than 1/3rd, which is a relief. Not surprisingly, circumcision rates were highest (85% in the ’70s) in the U.S. when feminism came on the scene…


  53. #5 From one 6/7 female to another:
    –Stay lean–FOREVER. If you aren’t, get freakin’ fit. I completely swear by this one. This will give you a leg up among other 6/7s especially as you advance in age.
    –Personal style: I am guessing you are fairly young–20’s. Opt for only one sexy wardrobe piece when going out. For example, pair a mini-skirt with a more conservative top. Killer heels with a pair of jeans that fit well. If you are going to show a little cleavage, then the rest of the outfit must be understated.
    –Hair and makeup: Keep you hair at least shoulder length–preferably straight. Don’t overdo the make-up. Stick with more natural looks despite what others in your cohort are sporting.
    –Prefer guys with job stability over high income.
    –Don’t be a workaholic. It is a turnoff.

    [Heartiste: good advice, especially #1.]


    • #1 gives you a huge leg up, especially if you can stay toned-skinny and not just skinny. Girls who are BOTH a Size 00 to 4 and well-toned (which requires gym time with weights) are actually quite rare outside of places like Southern CA and Miami (where bikini season is a lot longer), so this body type alone gives you a huge bump in other cities.


      • My advice would be just to avoid Miami and Southern CA and you’ll do fine.


      • I consider going to and going out in LA or San Diego (I have to go there often for work, so it’s free for me) the best form of continuing education, as a single girl. I always come back to the East Coast leaner, tanner, and sharper when it comes to observing social cues around me.


  54. i hear in sweden the feminists are clamoring for surgical removal of external genitalia from male babies because penises are degrading to women.


  55. I’m calling bullshit on the whole “A 7 in her 20s is Most Men’s Dream” thing.

    I know a couple, her a solid 7 in her early 20s with a sweet personality, the proverbial half-his-age-plus-seven years to her male partner. Him a solid upper beta with provider tendencies, a bit dull but amiable enough.

    Long story short, with some application of game principles, I slept with her multiple times, then sent her back to him. He had no idea any of it went on.

    And the thing is, when it comes to game, I’m a rank amateur, so the whole “an Alpha will be able to steal a woman away from her provider Beta” thing doesn’t apply here.

    I realize the usual caveats apply about anecdotal evidence, but just a fair word of warning to Betas who might get too comfortable because they settled down with a cute and personable 7 at her reproductive peak: female hypergamy is still female hypergamy, so you should still be on guard.


    • Everything you say is true and believable. Keep in mind, what ch means in that quote is that it would make most men very happy, not that the relationship will be perfect. Your final sentence is spot on.


    • I agree with your first sentence and the anecdotal story.

      In my mid-20s there was a gal who would show up to maybe 1 out of 10 house parties. She was easily an 8 for most, maybe a 7 for those with excessively high standards. When I asked about her, they said “Forget it, she’s a 20 year old virgin and will wait until marriage.”

      Over the next 5 years I’d see her maybe twice a year — she was really sweet, very attentive, didn’t drink excessively ever, and had no bad habits or outward signs of attention whoring. Just a sweet, nice gal from the exurbs.

      I finally had enough of the “she’s a virgin and is a waste of time” crap that I was hearing from even women in the circle, so I pretty much demanded she come out with me before I left town for the winter. We went out 3 times, I didn’t pay $1 for any of her side of the “dates” and we slept together — with her ASD coming up with “I’m a virgin and don’t want to have sex” while her body practically dragged me into her apartment.

      I hate sex with virgins, but she was a rock star in bed, as if 8 years of adulthood celibacy was waiting to be unlocked. The first time we slept together, she begged me not to fuck-and-tell. The second time we slept together, 2 nights later, she softly asked if I told anyone (I didn’t), and said she was thankful that I wasn’t bragging.

      We slept together regularly for another month right up to about 3 hours before I was getting on a flight to leave town for 8 weeks. When I returned 2 months later, almost every guy and half the women I knew in that scene asked me how I managed to bag her — and I never whispered a word to a single soul.

      Perfect, my ass. Had she had a boyfriend, she still would’ve been spellbound by a guy who knows a woman’s buttons.

      I don’t prescribe to groupthink, other than the fact that when a man is a man and treats a woman like a woman, things work better.

      Oddly enough, said ex-virgin still pops in the wank bank regularly. I wonder if she’s fat and gross by now, 10 years or so later.


  56. The response to the girl was on the mark except for the part about the lipstick and stockings. Lipstick shows that the girl’s a flake and superficial. Ditto as to the stockings (but not quite as much). They have the same effect on me as a girl with tramp stamps.
    I’d say avoid any conspicuous face paint and just stay with the moisturizers, and clear stuff, and wear regular girl stockings..


  57. To #5, the 6/7 girl:

    Recognize that even if men notice and recognize subtle IOIs like hair-fixing and brief eye-contact, this will not make them sufficiently comfortable to approach. Learn to start conversations in public. Ask for his number if you like him and he seems interested. Break the physical barrier first and engage in kino escalation (he should get the hint and make a move eventually).

    A lot of feminist rhetoric (the “potential rapist” variety) assumes that women take responsibility for these things. So if you want to meet men who believe that stuff, you will have to assume those responsibilities. (Or get lucky at a house party or friend’s wedding)


  58. on December 2, 2011 at 3:58 pm The Real Vince

    Uncharacteristically humane.

    “A friendly, non-shit testing 7 with a slender figure is like the holy grail to 70% of the world’s men.”

    Went out with a 7 last night who oozed femininity… and gave me nothing in the way of shit-tests. We got along, I teased, but not much banter followed and so it was ultimately kind of boring. Shit tests are fun during courtship phase.

    I can’t help but feel that women who don’t shit-test you early on may end up nagging you for the rest of your life.


  59. You’re forgetting that it’s the woman assessing herself as a 6-7, meaning she’s actually a 5.


  60. Email #5 (from a girl)

    That’s what was said to all the dudes who were 6s and 7s before game was founded.

    Ladies, get fit with some cute asses because in the end your face can be between a 4-10 if you have a hot body.


  61. Email #4 Wall of Text…

    A few personal experiences along these same lines.

    The girl I’m seeing for last year and who I can honestly say I’ve very successfully honed my game with goes mental all the time on me.

    I generally pass these shit tests by either reframing, agreeing and amplifying or occasionally going mental.

    In each case, the result is the same….chicks love drama…they need it.

    Without this “wall of text” they’re feeling lost.

    this guy has been responding appropriately by all acccounts.

    In my case, I take my girl out for her birthday to a big party. I’ve got some artists friends there who are visiting from out of town. So at some point, one of the musicians takes my seat near my girl so I shift over to one of the other visiting guys and have a drink with him.

    After, she’s complaining and bitching and moaning about that…

    I shut her out. Then after dropping her off at home, she calls up 3 times and asks if she can stay over the next night.

    I say not after that little show. Next night she brings me soup for my soar throat etc.

    At the same time I’m also gaming another girl very successfully. We went out for drinks together. Afterwards that girl is so smitten she starts writing various cryptic notes on her FB page that “life is drama, a game a dream”…

    So…there you go….game is game. They want it and need it…

    If I’ve learned one thing, it’s that feelings aren’t facts. Women thrive on emotion. If you fuel that in a more controlled way, they’ll be more engaged.

    This reader says his girl blows up at him, then starts sending trial texts “your mother’s FB page is so funny”…..

    There’s a great lesson here for every guy learning game.

    Don’t react to every single thing she does. She is always testing you…consciously or unconsciously.

    “A dream, a game”—–that girl I’m gaming wrote that after I went out for drinks wiith her and pulled every game trick there was….they love it even if they don’t know what “game” is…


  62. #4 “Wall of text”

    Read through this and reminds me of the girl I’ve been seeing and have successfully gamed.

    Never play into their frame.

    They love drama, they love the push-pull. If you don’t reframe her drama, take control, or otherwise ignore all her crap they will lose respect.

    The girl I’m seeing constantly shit-tests. When I ignore them, she gets more and more turned on.

    Another girl I’m gaming and went for drinks with for the first time recently, wrote on her FB pages a very cryptic and telling note….they don’t know “game” per se.

    She wrote: Affairs of the heart, Life is drama…. Her friend replied: Sounds good. She replied: “A dream, a game”.

    The fact she knows I’m with someone and yet sees herself a player in a bigger drama means guys should always keep the mystery and fantasy going.

    Feelings aren’t facts. Girls blow up all the time, then they send those same trial texts this guy is getting and doesn’t understand.

    He writes: “”Then that night she texts me some bs about my mom being funny on facebook “Your mom is soo funny”. “”

    That’s what we here would call a “Trial Text”….this guy seems to be very successfully gaming her and she’s responding in kind.

    But the lesson here is when guys are successful, they sometimes lose “hand” by reacting to the girl’s emotional outbursts. They’re little storms…nothing to worry about.

    This is where a guy begins beta back-sliding by reacting to her weirdness instead of embracing and encouraging it…after a while, she’ll shiift back.

    But by all accounts he’s hooked her, she’s acting “beta”…with all the emotional neediness.


    • Yeap, she keeps calling me but i have yet to answer this whole week. I like your perspective, subconsiously she is doing this for her need of drama and its really a big test. A test that i obviously give no fuck about. So ive been with other girls in the mean time until she comes crawling back. Women are sick


  63. on December 4, 2011 at 12:14 pm Goddamn right I'm angry

    Thanks for bringing up male genital cutting.

    **If you’re not in the mood to read an anti-circ. rant, you might want to skip over this posting. But then again, if you’re the type whom an anti-circ rant would be likely to piss off, then this post is EXACTLY the one you should be reading.**

    One aspect I think needs mentioning is how it falls under the larger rubric of the societal bias against men and male sexuality—which MEN are responsible for allowing to continue.

    It’s absurd in a way that this blog post would even be news to a majority of men. Would anyone (who wasn’t insane or who had some serious mental illness) seriously consider whether or not cutting the labia or foreskins off baby girls might confer a societal benefit?

    Men in general are the BIGGEST FUCKING PUSSIES on this issue and the ones most in denial about it.

    The issue needs to be un-tabooed and TALKED ABOUT. (Try bringing it up in polite conversation, and you’ll see what I mean. You’ll get snickers, dismissiveness, or looks like you’re from another planet).

    But this won’t happen as long as men pretend, “it’s not a big deal” (wrong, it’s a very big deal), or “I’m glad I was circumcised,” (no you’re not, you just didn’t have a choice and this is your way of consoling yourself), or “trust me, it works just fine,” (FYI, sorry, but no, it does not “work just fine.” For starters, you had roughly half the shaft skin skinned off it, resulting in permanent bio-mechanical impairment), or any of the other top 100 bullshit reasons men tell themselves to pretend they haven’t been harmed.

    (My personal favorite is, “I think there’s more important things in the world than this.” Bullshit. Men should be out in the streets screaming bloody murder this was done to the most sensitive part of their bodies and demanding it not be inflicted on future generations. Once THAT’S been accomplished THEN go occupy Wall Street, or pontificate about US foreign policy all you want).

    (I even know of a prominent PUA site that BANNED all mention of circumcision, even in the context of anti-male bias or sexual functioning. Someone posted that they went soft going for the condom and I’m forbidden to dare suggest it may be because you can’t jerk yourself or experience pleasure the way your body was designed to? If you happen to be reading this, and you know who you are, then fuck you for your contribution to making this an elephant in the living room).

    I don’t know how to wrap this up (goddamn pun, when I’m trying to be serious), so I’ll just say I know I’m a shitty writer, and that men need to stop being pussies and demand an end to this.

    Maybe that came off too angry or condescending, and I run the risk of not being taken seriously because of it, but seriously, men need to wake the fuck up on this.


    • My parents did not cut me and my brother. They didn’t want to cause us pain. I didn’t cut my two sons for the same reasons. I feel bad for the kids who get cut and the doctor screws it up.

      Every woman who has seen it was never disappointed.

      p.s. blacks are not big, it is you who is small and below average.


  64. *sigh*

    Cirkies pining for Lost Foreskin
    wtf is this place turning into
    The Spearhead


  65. on December 9, 2011 at 7:50 pm Goddamn right

    “Cirkies pining for Lost Foreskin”

    What a disgusting thing to say.

    Why are men so cruel and dismissive of the psychological pain of other men?


  66. on January 6, 2012 at 2:37 pm epsilon eridani

    The most important part of #4’s email is:

    “I’m 21.”

    There’s no reason for you to obsess over any one chick, especially at that age. Get over her and find another playmate. Rather, find another playmate and you’ll be stunned how fast you’ll get over the previous one.