OkCupid Corruption & Online Dating Tactic

I’ve always wondered how much database integrity online dating websites maintain. It would be very easy for an insider with a grudge or a boner to do the metaphorical equivalent of downvoting any one particular user’s profile. Now a reader writes to fuel my suspicions:

An ex of mine, who is/was merely an active OkCupid user, once gloated to me that she was given administrator access, ability, and privilege at the site, simply for being a cool femme type. Of course our side doesn’t get gifted with such love.

Her suggestion was that, if I ever got back on after we broke up and started scoring poon again, she could look in on me and invent ways to harass me.

Worthwhile intel for the Chateau. Wonder how pervasive that sort of thing is.

I can believe this. Imagine the hard-up nerdlings that code and administer dating sites. One of their cute babe customers gets in contact with the denizens of the IT deep. Falling over themselves with glee at having secured the (faked) attention of a non-fat whale for once in their lives, and recognizing the awesome power they wield within their manboobed, pinched milieu, they’d probably bend over backwards faster than a prepubescent Chinese gymnast to shower her with Gifts of the Honorary Vagi, which would include supersecret access to all sorts of supposedly well-guarded user data. Never underestimate the rapidity with which an undersexed nerd will give away the farm and betray his principles for a cute girl with a flirty vibe.

So, is it pervasive? Who knows. Is it probable? Yeah.

Online dating is really a shit show for (non-gaming) men. Besides the back room subterfuge and the cosmically awful ratio of men to women, you also have to deal with blowback effects from profiles that stay up after you’ve met and banged a girl. Why would a man feel like putting time and effort into a girl he’s banged when he sees her continuing to log into her profile? Online dating may streamline meeting girls feeding girls attention, but it also undermines investing in them. It’s the perfect vehicle to distribute the products of the 21st century mating market.

While online dating websites are not my go-to sexonomy, there are ways to sufficiently exploit their information asymmetries and competitor contrast opportunities to get laid fairly regularly off of them. Reader “A. Veidt” offers an example:

I’m a skeptic of “online dating” (even the term is a contradiction: dates do not happen outside of tactile range), mostly because I think chicks lie in their close-cropped five-year-old profile pictures. But I also go where the pussy is, and increasingly, it’s possible to find some decent women on free sites like OKCupid. And anyway, sometimes I’m bored at work.

The key to getting a decent return on investment is to invest as little as humanly possible in any one girl until you’ve got a phone number and a firm commitment for a time to meet up (in your neighborhood, somewhere quiet and cheap). Girls on these sites get ridiculous numbers of messages, and I’m convinced that’s why many otherwise sort-of-attractive women (who surely don’t need okcupid to get men) sign up: they love the one-way, no-commitment flow of attention. Log in once a week, read your adoring fanboy mail, and log off without answering any of it. What could be better? It’s like having a Dial-a-Beta.

As a consequence, messaging girls with the standard shit is a waste of time. “Hey, you like Perks of Being a Wallflower? Me too!” Give me a break. They’ve heard it all before: every piece of information in their profile has been used by some sad sack to try and open them. So, instead, I wrote a stock opener that I use on literally everyone. It saves time. Log in for five minutes a day, paste this to five chicks you think are interesting, and move on with your life. Plus, it’s unusual, so it might knock an attention-seeker off her pedestal and get her to (even though she hadn’t planned on it) actually write back. Here it is:

SUBJ: the bet

“so, obviously you’re aesthetically interesting, but a buddy of mine was looking over my shoulder just now and claimed that – without a doubt – your profile was written by a guy; he says any profile with so little information makes him suspicious.  [EDITOR’S NOTE: change the part after the semicolon as needed. it doesn’t matter what it actually says. don’t make it complimentary, and don’t get specific. if it’s a confusing non sequitur, so much the better. run, hamster, run.]

he claimed that there were a million dead giveaways. I came to your defense, of course, but it got a little out of hand and now we’ve got a $20 bet going as to whether or not you’re really a girl. so, just between you and me, am I about to lose $20?”

It seems retarded to me, but it keeps working. I think girls love the unusual nature of the accusation and relish the chance to prove themselves; they like the framing of a guy who’s hanging out with his friends and not sitting around lonely at home; and, of course, it’s a neg. That’s why it’s important not to compliment her except in the most oblique and ambiguous way (“aesthetically interesting”—you may have to tone this down for the stupider chicks. sometimes I use “interesting looking.” don’t say pretty.)

I sent that message verbatim to a girl today and got the following response back within hours:

“Without a doubt, more than anything I know, I am 100% female. My profile was written by me, sincere and honest.

Meaning, if this bet is real, your friend lost $20 and you should take me out for a drink with your winnings.


I have gotten this response back close to verbatim many times. “I’m a girl! Tee hee! Use your winnings to take me out!” After this, game as normal; get her phone number, meet up within a couple of days, and treat her like any other chick. (Which means, don’t actually start serving up drinks from your fictitious winnings, of course. You would, but you lost that $20 back to your buddy—it’s sort of an interesting story actually . . .)

(Two pics of the girl, who’s 23, are attached; I’d ask that you not use them on the site, but I figured you need some way to judge personally whether this just works on fatties and uglos.) [ed: the chick is a cute, slender blonde.]

Anyway, I don’t want to see the world oversaturated with this opener, but there are so many retards on OKCupid that I don’t think it’ll be a problem. Girls join the site every day and leave just as regularly; there’s always fresh blood. Plus, after biting Style’s material for years, I figure I should give back when I stumble upon something that works.

Any Chateau readers out there have similar low-investment, high-yield material for sorting through the bullshit on online sites?

The floor is open. I believe there are online game techniques in the archives of this blog as well. FYI, I’ve used the “are you really a girl?” line once on a girl I was picking up through a dating website. It wasn’t calculated game so much as a glib throwaway joke at her expense, but she did respond with glitter and confetti popping out of her vagina. Chicks love having to prove themselves to men. When they are in the defensive crouch answering your challenge, your perceived value experiences a passive rise. That’s because girls will appraise men to whom they have qualified themselves as necessarily being worthy of their sycophancy.


  1. on June 26, 2012 at 2:41 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM)


    okcupid.com = okstupidpay4myginadatigaveaway4free.com zlozzlloozlzoz

    match.com = oldsnatch.com lzozozozoz
    jdate.com = bernankifiedbutthate.com zlozozoz
    eharmony.com = nowpaymemoney.com
    plentyoffish.com = pretossedtunasalad.com



    • on June 26, 2012 at 5:18 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM)

      hey heartsistez heartistzes heartistez!!!!

      i am a big hit at the spearheadz spearheadz speareheadzz zlozzozzozlzlz

      read the commentz!!!


      What it comes down to is that women are terrible long-term planners and thus terrible investors.

      For women do not operate in the realm of abstract, exalted ideals, but rather they operate in the realm of gina tingles and butt tingles. The ancients realized this in their Great Books and Classics which exalt Zeus, Moses, Jesus, and Thor over a woman’s butt tingles.

      A woman’s greatest asset is her youth. With it, she can gain her way into an exalted mythology of wife and grandmother. But too, too many women waste it on pursuing the imediate gratifiction for their butt tingles and gina tingleszlzozlzolzozlzozo.

      Then, they hit 30, and their tinglez tingl gina tinglalzizyzzizlz and butt tinglelzlzlelele aren’t so great anymore. But by the time she hits 30, her greatets asset is gone.

      Today’s Bernanke elders smile upon this, as the depopulation of the responsible class is achieved. Ben Berannke rubs his hands and smiles, creates a few more debt-based dollars which men must some day pay off, and funds more feminist studies with it.

      I wrote a poem for all the poor, deosuled, asscoked women with cats. I will share it soon.

      Here is a little poem I wrote for Jessica Bennet:

      “da professional womenz ode”

      alpha fucks and beta bucks
      dat is how we roll
      da butthexting cockass we fucks and sucks
      and in our anuthes it doth deosul
      alpha fucks and beta bucks
      it is da way of da fed
      to transfer assetss to dose who butthext
      cuckold dose who pay for our bread
      beta bucks and alpha fucks
      it’s what day teach us we;’re entitled too
      da assetts from betas we plucks
      after da alphas desol us through our hole for poo
      cuckold da betas cockhold da alphas
      datsz what day taught us in mba grad school
      as da feiisnsits see no truth nor justice in their laws
      and say da great books for menz was all fools.
      yes, yes, i did very good on my gmats
      dey bernenakifed my soul away, left me with cats



    • on June 26, 2012 at 5:27 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM)

      Bennet is the reason men are not getting married these days.

      Simply put women are making marriage impossible by:

      1. refusing to settle down
      2. refusing to commit
      3. changing their mind after they commit
      4. taking a man’s children and assets after they commit
      5. giving their gina and butthole freely in their youth, as they are desouled
      6. after giving away their gina and butthole for free, trying to charge an enormous amount for it, after they are loose and gooey and oozing with stds
      7. cheating on men as never before, before, during, and after “holy” matrimony

      and then,
      and then after all this,
      women and their socon scheisters tell men to “man up”
      and get married
      to the dishonest, std-addld, bernankified, desouled, haggard, selfish tarts, who have been asscoked so many times that they are just waiting for a nice beta to lay their vengeful wrath upon, assoccking him in divorce sourt, so as to fund the asscocking sessions they were addicted to in college which no longer teches great books for men knowledge



      • on June 26, 2012 at 5:40 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM)


        yes all the wall streeteetetet nitwit proetestors

        are forgetting to


        the right people

        the neoconc warmonhgering, debt-creating, honor-hating federal reserver private bankers who create moneyz
        out of thin air by placing everyone in debt
        privatievze protssics and socialize risk
        feminism and war (as feminism is war)
        who fund
        asscocking in spirit and in literal cockckass in assess zlzozolz
        who finance
        tucker max rhyme sitwh goldman sax secretive tapers of butthex (with your future wife who they need to desoul to make her loyal to the fita doallr and not god man family) to get the world used to being butthexed as once you are butthexed by the neoocn cockas you are more servile obedienet will die in tehir wars
        who fund
        the phahameecuatical companies who drug up all our boys
        who funed fund the fmeinsit movement
        to deconstruct the great books and classics on all our campuses
        hollow them out and get rid of homer and dante and shakespeare an dthe bible
        leave them with noting but femlit classes on entitlement and welath transfer lzozlzl

        the federal resvere private banksters

        implementing the ten planks of ths e communist manifesto

        who created
        the welath transferirng dot com bubble
        the welath transferirng dot com bubble real estate bubble marriage bubble college studnet loan bubble funding professors who agree with the fiat dolalrz and degreess until the fiat degreees only funcion is to put the studnet in debt while dumbing them down teahcing them to obery horrid ugly evil dsoulles harpy womenz zlzozl
        the welath transferirng dot com bubble

        detsorying the family


        how the fatassed in the beltway neocon jonah goldber william benenetes operate lzozllzlzlzlzlzozo:

        1. deconstruct the great books on univeristy campuses
        2. tell men they need to man up
        3. dumb down the entire schools system
        4. tell men they need to man up
        5. assrape men in divorce court
        6. tell men they need to man up
        7. send men to die on foreign shores in foreign neoocn wars
        8. tell men they need to man up
        9. drug boys with ritalin/adderoll for being boys
        10. tell men they need to man up
        11. encourage woem to giver thie aholes and ginaholes early and often to douchebags
        12. tell men they need to man up
        13. destroy the classical, heroic character in their neocon movies, replacing them with asscocking gay cowboys
        14. tell men they need to man up
        15. print money from thin air and inflate and dlate bubbes to seize a man’s home and property
        16. tell men they need to man up
        17. enocurage women to become fat, whiney bitches
        18. tell men they need to man up
        19. publish, promote, fund, and finance asscokers licke tucker max who film secrtive tap9ng of assockinhg session without the girl’s consent, tucker ma rhymes with goldam sax, repeating tucker’s lies that he is six fet tall inthe neocon weekly standadth .
        20. tell men they need to man up
        21. transofrm the church from an instititution where a man coul once go to meet a virginal, exalted wife, into a front for the divorce industry, where single mothers with three children from three asscockers go to rope in a betabmale to pay for the assocker’s spawn
        22. tell men they need to man up
        23. castigate, attack, and impugn men for acting like men
        24. tell men they need to man up
        25. transform the noble, exalted university into a nursery, ruled by neocon women exalting asscockers, asscokcing, and good grammar, exiling and deconstructing the great book and men, and rewading the servile future nannies of teh nanny state with fiat dollars delivered fresh from ben beranke’s helicopter
        26. tell men they need to man up
        27. remove all men from the publishing industry, so that priscialla painton of simon and schuster sodom and scheister can publish tucker max rhymes iwth godlman sax’s stories on how he asscoked a girl (somone’s future wife who will asscock her future huspband in divorce coutrt as revenge for having been assocked by a neocns) and taped it secrtly without her conthent lzozozlzoo. remove all men form the publishing industry and repalce deep, prodoufn real great books for men with twilight vampire asscocking female rape fanasty rape fanatsatsy “roamance” novels
        28. tell men they need to man up
        29. conceive of a hundred government programs to criminalzize men and force them o hand over their assetts to women
        30. tell men they need to man up
        31. financially incentivizee womem to file for divorce, promising them that their former husdband will have to pay for all their futrue assocking sessions, and that they get the kids/house/car/assetts
        32. tell men they need to ma up
        33. fill the law schools with fatm, embittered, burned-out, nasty (in looks an spirit) post-asscoked lawyeresses, an replace Moses’ and Zeus’s law with bernake’s banker laws whichexlats theft via the inflation tax
        34. tell men they need to man up.


        what aalalz am i mizssing here:???

        feel free to addodoon ti oit! lzozlzl


      • LOL. The great GBFM does it again!

        35. enlist western men for neocon wars on foreign shores to destroy the homes of the foreigners who them emigrate to western shores with a vengeance to take the jobs, out-breed, and pimp the daughters of western men
        36. tell men they need to man up.
        37. fund the campaigns of both parties with fiat dollars so that any politician who opposes asscocking laws against men will loose his funding for the next election and see the funding of his opponent doubled
        38. tell men they need to man up.


      • on June 27, 2012 at 12:58 am Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM)

        39. fund both the welfare state that robs men and the warfare state that sends men to die
        40. tell men they need to man up
        41. spearhead both the porn movement which harms the traditional family and the feminist movement which harms the traditional famliy by deconstructing men and manhood
        42. tell men they need to man up
        43. abort a man’s children without his permission, or force him to pay for children he never gets to see, without his permission.
        44. tell men they need to man up



      • Sir, will you consider my invitation to be the honored guest speaker at this years mens conference at my church?


      • on June 27, 2012 at 2:10 am Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM)

        i wouoodwoudl lovezzz to!!!!

        will i be speaking beofre tim tebow or after tim tebowlozlzoozzlz?


      • Got to (okay, “gotta”) agree. Thanks for posting something somewhat readable.


    • but are wimmin happier..?


    • barf.
      who the hell
      online dates?

      Chicks get inundated by beta poetry
      and guys get surprise-gift packages


  2. on June 26, 2012 at 2:53 pm Dr. Murray F. Rottencrotch

    No. way.

    Anyway, “Are you really a girl” is opener/neg crack in a world where beauty pageant darlings are outed as post-op sex change cases.

    Why worry about going to hell? We already reside there.


  3. OKCupid story unlikely. Details would leak out and the managers/investors put a stop to it because of the harm such stories would do to the reputation of the site (driving paying members to competitors). Microeconomics 101.

    Online technique seems solid- a little contrived with the bet and fake buddy, but if it works it works.


    • Unlikely that she got a password, not terribly unlikely she may have gotten a starry-eyed beta mod to tweak something as a one-time deal.


    • @Maurice,

      I agree re OKCupid Admin privileges – highly unlikely.

      I smell BS…


    • You’re probably right about the first.


    • Agree. Completely unlikely. The story sounds like beta-bullshit. However, maurice is wrong about driving to competitors, since OKCupid is free.


    • I think it’s highly likely that some lonely IT guy, using their own service and perusing local profiles, would try to play the “big man” and give admin access to somebody, if only to sabotage their competition. Would be surprised if this has never happened.


    • Yep. Hoax.
      Too many have slipped past recently.


  4. on June 26, 2012 at 2:56 pm Days of Broken Arrows

    Before answering, I’d like a description from your friend as to what “administrator access, ability, and privilege” means. If women are being allowed to read or delete the messages men receive, I’m pretty sure this is a violation of terms.

    This now sounds more like a news story waiting to happen — one that could bring down the site. Damned if I would get on a site that would do this. Feel free to email me with this if it’s on the downlow.


    • Probably means access to the site’s subscribers’ real names and email addresses.


    • on June 27, 2012 at 4:40 am Art Vandelay

      This sounds highly unlikely to me as well. Might work for a small site with no staff.


    • Friends, does anyone remember Bill Clinton?

      You know, the 42nd President who took time out from world affairs, in which many human lives were at stake, to flirt with and promote a moderately cute Jewess while the two were being secretly taped by a second Jewess, who was urged to expose those tapes by a THIRD Jewess.

      If this sort of thing can happen at the highest level of government, um, WHY THE FUCK NOT ON OKCUPID?


      • on August 21, 2012 at 3:45 pm thasswhatimtalkinbout

        um, linda taped monica talking about her BJing the prez. yeah, monica’s jewish. not tripp — she married a german,

        and give my regards to the fuehrer, will you?


  5. on June 26, 2012 at 3:12 pm Frank Rizzo

    I’ve used the neg, “you seem pretty famous on here.” It sends the hamster brain stirring.


  6. on June 26, 2012 at 3:16 pm Days of Broken Arrows

    Any Chateau readers out there have similar low-investment, high-yield material for sorting through the bullshit on online sites?

    Yes. You need to emotionally engage them because Beta after Beta sends them slobbering, down-on-their-knees “compliments.

    Start an argument over trivial bullshit that she makes clear she’s interested in on her profile. For example if she’s a music head and says she “loves the way Sinatra croons” simply reply with “Sinatra? Really? Billie Holliday is the original – he took from her. Look it up.”

    Of course, I won’t be doing this, seeing as how any given female can be an “administrator” and read all my messages. But if you want to do it, go ahead.

    As for me, I now want to make a profile called “Mr. Sandusky” and message single moms telling them I’m up for babysitting their boys.


    • on June 26, 2012 at 4:52 pm Nine Furies

      Haha DO IT!


    • As for me, I now want to make a profile called “Mr. Sandusky” and message single moms telling them I’m up for babysitting their boys.

      Actually, the single mothers already perform Mr. Sandusky’s ‘activities’ on their own sons and that of their fellow single mothers’ sons. Boy abuse committed by single mothers is America’s (and the feminist West’s) dirty little secret.


  7. on June 26, 2012 at 3:19 pm Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM)


    hey heartsistess!!!!

    a uch betterr better dating site would be where modern ebrnanakifedd womenz had to:

    1. post pictures of every cockas dat has ben in your butthole, anuthhole, or mouthhole lzozlzozzlozloz


    it is good to kknow
    all da difefrent shaped s and sizes
    of da lotsass cockas
    dat have been in
    a womyn’s
    gina hole
    and mooutholzozlzozlzozlzoz


    • woohhhhh

      also a worthwhile mental exercise the next time you decide to “go down” on one of those inglorious fuckholes.


  8. In terms of the amount of attention a girl can receive, I discovered this first hand about 10 years ago, with my sister, who was about an 8 to 9. A girlfriend told her about Match.com, and wanted her to setup a profile, so one Saturday morning she decide to check it out. She had chores to do, so she setup a new Hotmail account and just uploaded a nice full length photo of herself, then went to do some laundry and came back about 40 mins later to check her email, then add some content and a title to her profile. She found that she couldn’t get into her Hotmail account, and called me to offer some advice. I realized the error message she was getting was her account was full – so she had received over 200 emails on a Saturday morning in 40 minutes?!

    She read a couple of emails, then decide not to bother reading the rest, and deleted the account.


    • I tried a slightly immoral experiment once. I got a few pics of a girl off the internet (no idea who) who was at least an 8 by most guy’s standards. Created a profile on plenty of fish and put a short generic profile blurb (I’m independent, love to travel, like music and films and so on) and then left it. Logged in the next day and there were over 1000 messages. That’s not a typo. I’ve seen a few women’s profiles on there where they post a screenshot showing their message count, it’s nearly always over 800 with some annoying caption underneath like “OMG guys all these messages in a few days, chill out!”. It’s pretty much a lottery to get your message read.


  9. “Log in for five minutes a day, paste this to five chicks you think are interesting, and move on with your life. ”

    Good luck with this. Finding five interesting chicks a week would be enough o a challenge. 99% of female profiles are *exactly* the same- “I love adventures! I’m a total foodie! I love to travel! I love (terrible) music!” Yawn.


    • Interesting = hot, your odds are better. Don’t go on there looking for the love of your life.


    • on June 27, 2012 at 4:42 am Art Vandelay

      Interesting as in “easy on the eye”. I think you can filter your results there for body type 😉


    • Women are fucking boring. That’s why female friends are fucking useless.

      Maybe one in a thousand women is actually worth having a platonic relationship with.


  10. In my brief stint I found a succinct, glib, halfway neg-ish openers worked best – and also least effort. I spent 4 weeks on there, 4 dates, 4 makeouts, 2 bangs (both from one meetup). Not bad for no effort. (Only one was worse in person than in her pics, two were as represented, one was actually hotter.)

    Two of those came from using a line from flight of the concords, with some different emphasis, as follows: “you’re SO. BEAUTIFUL. like a tree.”


    • Here’s where silverfox comes in and talks about banging 20 year old russians in NYC from match because bitches dig old guys, whether they know it or not.


      • Well I am a 52 and while I have never banged a 20 year old Russian, my latest was a trim adequate fun 21 year old who gives awesome head. The problems I keep coming across with online women are that they are either: unemployed or suffering from some pretty major physical or emotional issues. Have to sort through a whole lot of dirt to find one that even faintly glitters like gold. On the flip side, quite a few of them are DTF and are eager to please


      • OK just made another profile and tried the above. First response:

        go fuck yourself and your stupid cunt friend

        Although she was Bi and they tend to be more aggressive.

        But yeah they do have emotional issues…of course they do. Even a halfway attractive 20-something girl has abundant prospects in real life. If she can’t organize something with some of those prospects then it’s because her standards are way out of whack, or she’s really aggressive, or she’s really flakey, or she’s really avoidant (i.e. made anxious by feelings of intimacy). Most on there are BisexualVeganPolyamorousFeminists who are “fluent in sarcasm” etc etc etc.


      • on August 21, 2012 at 4:17 pm thasswhatimtalkinbout

        horked up my corndog laughing at her response. so rare to hear a woman call a guy a cunt. almost makes her worth meeting.


  11. I once did an experiment where I looked at about 100 womens profiles on OKCupid and was shocked at how incredibly similar women are too eachother in there interests, professions, what they write in there profiles etc. You could literally group almost all women into just a handful of categories like healthcare, academia, artsy/fashion etc etc. They also all seemed to be in a similar range of intelligence, not smart but not really dumb either. The funny thing? They all seem to think they are unique snowflakes but they are all so similar.

    Then I started looking at mens profiles, seeing if I could also group men into just a handful of categories like women I was going to go to 100 like I did for women but I stopped after about 15-20 or so because there were no patterns. Men were all over the place, every different profile had a totally different profession, interests, backgrounds . Men swayed wildly in intelligence from really smart to really dumb as well.


    • @Tea,

      When I was into the Online Dating thing I noticed the same pattern. It seemed that girls were borrowing/plagiarizing their competitors profiles for stuff to say – or else they all attended the same profiling writing seminar, or some such.

      I looked at guys who might be competitors of mine, and they too had similar profiles, though not so much in lock step as the girls.

      For instance I remember nearly everyone said they just loved “David Sedaris”, and similar brands etc…

      So all you need to do then is be different from the herd.

      My profile challenged girls reading it to measure up on a number of scales to see if they might be suitable for me – there was no supplicating, or anything else like that.

      Like the 2nd case study above, I used a “form letter” approach, changing one or two words, like girl’s name and such. The email was short and all it did was try and elicit some response. If I got a response back, then I pressed to meet for a “coffee date”, nothing else – no small talk, IM’ing, phone or whatever.

      The biggest factor for me being successful online was, my “disruptive” profile, my very targeted marketing – using very specific search to narrow down what I was looking for.

      So for instance, there 5-10 million Match users, but after I put in my search criteria, I narrow it down to about 150 targets. Then send our about 5 emails per day, setup a few dates for week days and go from there. It never took me more than a week or so to get laid.


    • Nature does not gamble with the house money, the girls. Just your stock, reliable, not too dumb, not too smart baby maker model will do. This is your point A to B transportation. With men nature just needs a few to stick to the wall.


      • It may be because of women’s extra X chromosome. It tends to moderate their genetics to the mean, and keeps women mediocre in most respects, including intelligence.


      • on June 27, 2012 at 1:07 am Petemeister

        Perhaps you are right but that’s a bleak outlook and a little dismissive of the millions of women more intelligent than David Collard.

        The more logical explanation, if you are looking at SMV, is that women will succeed by default unless they are; fat, bitchy etc. Excluding the undesirable traits that should be relatively easy to avoid, women don’t have to do much apart from be around to get laid. So conforming to the mores of the herd makes sense. Men, on the other hand, need to stand out from the crowd by being somewhat alpha else die in obscurity.


      • Too narrow a view for my liking. A few geniuses with idiots at their disposal to carry out their plans are better than genius alone. Test pilots are a little fool hardy at times are they not? They may be as dumb as a stone, but shaped and tied to a spear, a tool. Do not dismiss the useful idiots that make up the body of men. Humanity has a will to survive as well.


      • “Humankind?” Lets just stop using this word. I have never met a human in my entire life. You’re either a man, a woman, or an unfortunate mistake. These days, “human” is pant-suit wearing beurocrat speak for feminized male or nasy aggressive bitch.


      • @David,



      • Mr. Collard, women’s extra X chromosome becomes inactivated and condenses in the cell as a Barr body. Please consult a biology text book before you make such statements.


      • I am aware of that, Bianca. I have a PhD in biology. You are referring to the Lyon Effect. Which X chromosome becomes inactivated depends on the cell and is partly random. Your point is irrelevant to my argument.


      • I still fail to see how having an extra chromosome (that becomes inactivated) correlates to mediocrity.


      • Bianca–

        If you don’t think there are gender differences in behavior as well as in physiology (which effects behavior) you’ve allowed yourself to become ideologically deluded and far from reality.


    • Exactly what psychology has established — the “men are smarter AND dumber than women” headline you have probably seen. The range is broader because we take risks and have to engage with the world to secure resources to lavish on becunted fuckwits.


    • So you looked at a bunch of profiles and found that in average they were, well, average. I am impressed.


  12. sort of like what Style said, be a dick times ten online. To project male dating behavior on to girls, I wonder if 99% of male profiles weren’t rejected on looks alone. I wonder how many girls (because all of them say this) who say “no shirts off, mirror shots plz, OMG yur so douchebag lolz omg.!” are actually quite receptive to the six pack abs self-portrait?


    • I saw one study (OKcupid?) that stated that, regardless of what women said about shirtless photos, they got better responses.


    • Really? You wonder?

      Of course more physically attractive people get better responses.



  13. on June 26, 2012 at 3:32 pm The Fucking Writer

    Some of my best success has come from online dating. It’s definitely a great buffer to cut through the bullshit. I agree that OkCupid doesn’t have much of a buffer between what could be fake and not, but more often than not, it’s all right.


  14. I have an below average looking female friend who always maintains a few hot chick profiles on OKC to see what the men she is dating off there are up to. It’s likely that any chick claiming database access is pulling the same stunt.


  15. Maybe its just me, but I get the feeling that online dating really skews women’s perceptions of their own attractiveness. Whereas I’m able to score pretty decent looking girls in real life (7s and 8s), I rarely get a “wink” or message from any chick better than a 6 online. Everytime I get a message from a sub-6 I want to go kill myself.

    The other possibility is that since online profiles only give girls photos and a very brief bio in which to judge status, they hypergamously rank the guys according to their photos since that is basically all they have to go on. I would say that if your looks are your best attribute, online dating is probably an easy way to go. For everyone else, you are likely decreasing your market power with online dating.


    • “Maybe its just me, but I get the feeling that online dating really skews women’s perceptions of their own attractiveness.”

      I’ve been ruminating over the same thing for a while now. I had hypothesized whether the online dating and social media revolution is over-inflating — and perhaps greatly — the self-perceived mate value of women that are heavy users.

      There is already data in the empirical literature corroborating that individuals are able to appraise their own mate value over time — via experiences on the mating market. Evolutionary psychologists David Buss and Todd Shackelford also recently collected data from married women on their mating preferences, and had a panel of independent raters assess their overall attractiveness. They found a correlation between overall attractiveness and choosiness on all relevant mate preference criteria, save for intelligence.

      Additionally, Buss and Shackelford provocatively went a step further by taking stock of additional data available on this issue in the wider literature and postulated the existence of a cognitive adaptation in women designed to set their mate preference aspirations according to their own mate value; that is, to become increasingly choosier — entitled — in proportion to their own attractiveness. (For a lucid visual of a highly entitled woman, quickly picture the prototypical young club vixen or equally young hot waitress strutting about.)

      Applied to the online dating and social media revolution, the potential upshot is that, given people’s (read: women’s) ability to appraise their own mate value in accordance with real-world feedback on the mating market, and given, more specifically, that the evidence supports the existence of an innate cognitive adaptation in women tying their own self-perceived mate value to their attractiveness, it is certainly possible that the veritable torrent of adulation, supplication, and compliments received by women online is up-regulating (increasing) their self-perceived mate value.

      It is not a far-fetched idea, and it is in line with the many other runaway processes we find elsewhere in the modern world: ancient adaptations interfacing in dysfunctional ways with evolutionary novelty (i.e., pornographic images stimulating men’s mating psychologies; metabolic- and appetitive-related genes driving people to both over-eat and eat unhealthy, refined flour, high sugar and high fat foods, inter alia).

      Such underlying mate value appraisal mechanisms could very well be unable to distinguish the difference between real-time feedback, on the one hand, and artificial cyber obsequiousness delivered en masse from adoring betas, on the other. Needless to say, it would not be in the long-term benefit of these particular women (a growing number, at that, given the increased popularity of these platforms) to be walking around thinking they’re Giselle Bundchen in her prime, despite being de facto 6s and 7s. A 6 walking around believing she has the mate value to land an alpha male 10 for a committed long-term relationship is setting herself up for life-long loneliness.

      So far as I know, this hypothesis hasn’t actually been tested yet. I’d imagine it’s only a matter of time before someone runs the test and collects data (there are already quite a few studies of online dating behavior in the literature).


    • Agreed. I can pull better looking women in real life than I can online. I even conducted an experiment where I ‘cut & pasted’ a Top 100 profile and stuck my photo on it. And not being the 6′ tall, white, chiseled features- my outcomes were exceedingly poor.


  16. on June 26, 2012 at 3:40 pm Newly Aloof

    I’d say forget online dating and use Roosh’s Day Bang techniques every place you go.


  17. “Dial-a-Beta” – LOL, classic.


  18. Shorter the better. Even terse, like you sent the message before going on another date. Neg a common interest (if you have any). Tell her she’s cute and ask for a date, not a number.

    Never follow up on messages that aren’t reciprocated. Never give up your Facebook. If they need to check you out on FB, just ignore them. If you end up IM’ing on site, number close. Never give out an AIM or GChat. Repeat: Never give up your Facebook. If you fail the number close within three messages or one IM exchange, move on.

    Invest as little time as possible getting to the date. Be aggressive in getting numbers to the point of being pushy.


    • Wrong on most counts and I don’t care to explain why.


      • I agree with some of what Ross says-no sense endlessly messaging with a woman who seems to love all the cyber attention but refuses to advance things into the real world. Such a waste of time to get hit with ” I’m really shy ” BS chicks pull. Want to get over being shy? Then do things that force you to not be shy-stupid bitches. Plus it is a numbers game-the more time you waste before getting a number means the more time some other guy has to work her for her number


    • I never go for numbers. I’ve even been on a few dates where we didn’t exchange numbers at all until we met in person.

      If it’s an initial message and she doesn’t respond, don’t be afraid to send a single follow-up. Don’t apologize for anything you said in your opener of course, all the other standard email/texting rules apply. Two reasons: first is that sometimes you can demonstrate a whole lot more creativity and contrast in two messages than one, and also some girls just don’t respond unless they get at least two messages from a guy. Multiple girls have admitted to me that they use this rule and their friends do too.

      Yeah it sucks but then that’s the nature of online dating. It would be neat to see a game-inspired, flipped-script site built around gender differences, one that aggressively promoted the quality of the men and forced the women to make lots of incremental choices rather than the equalist free-for-all that is okcupid.


      • Agreed, skip the number and go right for the date. Works “IRL” as well.


      • It would be neat to see a game-inspired, flipped-script site built around gender differences, one that aggressively promoted the quality of the men and forced the women to make lots of incremental choices rather than the equalist free-for-all that is okcupid.

        This is something I’ve been thinking about too. How do you think such a site should work?


  19. @askjoe “are actually quite receptive to the six pack abs self-portrait?”

    Yes. Guarantee that the ones worth banging would soak themselves over a hard body messaging them. OKCupid asserts as much, check their blog archives. I guarantee that you could control for this: hit the same city with 2 profiles using identical intro emails sent to 2 (distinct) groups of 50 women. Use identical profiles except for the pictures, one a hot guy, one just average. Want to bet $20 on who gets more responses? Want to double down that it’s at least a factor of 10? Want to double that that the hot dude might not even have to open anyone? With good enough pix, I guarantee the ladies would be delivering their box into his inbox.

    As far as superuser access, the site used to be a lot more freewheeling. Now that they’re owned by Match, I imagine they’ve stopped that. Also, there used to be “flagmods” and forum moderators who were ordinary users with some moderation privileges, so this chick may have just had a highly elevated view of her influence on the site.

    As far as attention, I made friends with one girl from a site and she once remarked to me that it was amazing the attention she got, and she was, by her own admission, very, very average (and that’s being a bit kind). She put herself out there as a little bit slutty and the betas were killing themselves to get at her.


    • oh true dat, good male pics are necessary. More to the point, same guy, goes the normal non-douche route or the biceps and tats route (maybe shirtless six pack pose, if you can pull it off).

      [heartiste: online game is doable, with or without a six pack. just don’t post half-naked pics if you want to avoid automatic DQ. it’s possible that online sites force women to channel their criteria into a narrower range that overemphasizes men’s looks and abs, but luckily in the meatspace wprld they revert to their usual SOP of judging men by far more criteria than their looks.]


    • on June 26, 2012 at 5:39 pm richard roma

      I don’t do shirtless pics but I am fit enough that it’s obvious even with a shirt on; I’m tall and have good facial features too. I get a message every 7-10 days on average; about 50% of them are from attractive or at least decent women. Not astounding I know, but it’s something.


      • It’s a lot better than most guys get-I would bet big money on it. It is easy to compare online dating to fishing-the only difference being, women don’t even need to cast a line, the fish (men) just jump out of the water and flop right into the women’s boats.


    • good points all, the stupid point I was making was that bitches seem to decry shirtless photos as loozerish. And I wondered if they stuck to their guns when they see your guns*. Anyway, meatspace >> cyberspace.

      * and yes, there is the online perv auto-disqual if a guy goes too far.

      I’m tall and have good facial features too. I get a message every 7-10 days on average; about 50% of them are from attractive or at least decent women.

      which would be about infinity more than most guys get from attractive girls, I’m sure because zero is a bad multiplier.


      • When women express dismay at the loserishness of men with shirtless photos, it’s not that they’re *actually* against six-packs and big muscles, it’s just that 97% of the guys who post such pictures are low-status wannabe-thugs… or whatever the white equivalent is. Half of ’em are probably on ‘roids, too.

        On the other hand, a successful man with a good career and a broad range of interests who also just *happens* to have a six-pack would be entirely swoon-worthy. I’m not sure how many of these guys exist in real life though — I mean, who has time to have a career *and* a broad range of interests *and* a six-pack? I try to get to the gym plenty, but geez, I got a lot of other ways to spend my time.


  20. on June 26, 2012 at 3:59 pm Fattie fat fattie


    What happens when the overweight marry.


  21. Thanks for the opening email tip. I’m stealing it.

    I use online dating pretty frequently because it’s so easy. Once a girl responds, you can get digits and a date set up within 2 to 3 emails. 95% of guys on there are total creeps (this has been confirmed by girls from the site (the girl I’m seeing now got opening emails about cumming on her glasses for god’s sake)) so being normal gets lots of results. As stated, the more aloof and/or negging of an opening email, the better the results.

    I also like the screening ability of online game. If a chick’s email has emoticons and awful grammar, I don’t want to even bother responding to her.


    • Didn’t know about the creep ratio, but there’s definitely more betas acting more shameless on there than you ever thought possible. Sometimes I get a friend of mine to email choice cuts to me, and there’s no shortage of self-proclaimed sensitive guys writing two page messages about how “different” they are. Reading that shit is like getting hit in the face with a wetnap.


      • Absolutely the creep ratio is HUGE. Guys go sexual right away, Sample ( from a woman I talked with ) Him-Nice smile Her-Thanks Him-Do you like anal? So yeah, between not sharing your life story and not being a sexual perv, lies the golden sweet spot. Humor is essential. And of course, illustrating your Alpha characteristics is crucial


  22. My buddy uses POF, and just thinks up different chick-crack personality tests off the top of his head. They choose an answer, he spouts truisms at them, they melt. Works well for him.


    • @Avery,

      Yeah that the other way to get chicks to email you from OKC, just come up with a test that’s funny and get some publicity for it.

      I especially like the the ones, “Are you Stephen’s Type Test” – then it basically asks a bunch of silly/trivial questions, scores them, and links to your profile…

      I’m not saying it works better than just searching for your type of chick directly.



    This is kind of fucked up, but my favorite line (thanks to ChatRoulette- just used it last night) is

    “Are you trans?”

    Its slightly better than “are you a girl” because it sounds like a DHV of transsexual lingo. Still has the neg, qualification, and masculine frame built in.


  24. Possible embellishments.

    “A friend of mine, who happens to think she knows better than I do , thinks your profile was written by a guy. ”

    If “she” comes up, and she will: “she’s just a…never mind ,its complicated. “


    • Yeah well complicated to women means you either are cheating on your wife or girlfriend so high probability you will blow yourself out of contention with a lot of women


      • Who cares? According to the principle of dominating a niche rather than pleasing to the entire herd, it works. And in skilled hands one can easily dispatch any accusation. A co-worker of mine has entered the world of Internet dating and is playing an open hand, menaing the women know about each other. On the other hand you can always go with she is the only one in the world for you, if that’s your thing.


  25. Online dating is really a shit show for (non-gaming) men. Besides the back room subterfuge and the cosmically awful ratio of men to women, you also have to deal with blowback effects from profiles that stay up after you’ve met and banged a girl. Why would a man feel like putting time and effort into a girl he’s banged when he sees her continuing to log into her profile? Online dating may streamline meeting girls feeding girls attention, but it also undermines investing in them. It’s the perfect vehicle to distribute the products of the 21st century mating market.

    True, but with sufficient game you can leap-frog ahead of the competition. I believe game + writing skills would allow you to reduce your cost and investment per lay. I’d say a good 50/50 balance between sarging and online dating should be good for racking up the noch-count and getting to the quality pussy.


  26. A. Veidt is on the money.
    Opening message should be as impersonal as possible.
    Also, as I understand only the first 25 characters or so are shown at the recipients inbox. So make a splash with that very first sentence.

    For the successful dates I’ve had my openers were impersonal questions that occured to me while skimming the profile.
    A girl who is a gemologist:
    ” What is more rare? A diamond or an emerald?”

    A girl that says she would like to live in ancient Rome:
    ” Wouldn’t you rather live in the future? You can travel back to ancient Rome just for the weekend.”

    Also, only message girls that are currently online. If you message someone offline you will get overrun in her inbox by hundreds of messages by the time she logs on.


    • I agree with you about making it fun. And keeping it informal as if you were talking to someone in real life. I think I’d be much more inclined to respond to someone who asked me one question than someone who sent me an entire email of information. I did that all the time, but I don’t think anybody ever sent me a message like that. One of my favorites was something I sent to a professional sailor on a historic ship.

      Title: Tell me where your sympathies lie…
      Subject: with Fletcher Christian or Captain Bligh?

      He really liked it and it turned out he knew a native of Pitcairn Island! There are masses of people out there. You need to do something to weed out people you’d never actually want to spend time with.


      • Captain Bligh’s loyalty to the queen vs Fletcher’s lust for exotic Tahitian girls? There is a better use for bread fruit than to feed slaves the cheapest fodder possible.


      • There was a lot of insight that could have been drawn from that question: authoritarian vs. mutineer, dispassionate vs. passionate, etc. Although now that I think of it, I don’t remember this guy actually answering the question. lol


      • Perhaps there is even more insight to be had that his lack of a coherent answer still made an impression.

        I was compelled to do so for not only did Bligh obviously not have any taste in women, his plan was to make them the foul beasts many have become all over the world given the formula:

        bread fruit > slave > lump of sugar.


  27. I recently asked a chick on OKCupid if she had any cute friends she could hook me up with as an opener. She came back with aren’t you married.


  28. I don’t really deal with OKCupid, but I will throw a line in the water at POF sometimes. Any man worth his salt can get laid within 4 and 10 days of putting a profile up, but damn, the shit you have to eat along the way takes the joy out of it.

    I’m that guy who has a profile up every three months for 10 days, then deletes it. I can’t tell you how many girls I’ve seen in 2012 that have had a profile up since 2010.

    To me, online dating is for when you move and lose a harem, or you travel a lot like me, and your harem starts thinning. It’s a great way to boost your numbers without a lot of extra effort, but like I said, it’s a pain in the ass if you take it too seriously.

    One thing I haven’t figured out yet is why I can bang a 9, and be blown off or flaked on by a 5 in the same week, then a month or so later (with the same profile) have to settle for a string of 6s. Shits don’t make sense to me. i just enjoy the 8/9s when they come, and rack up notches with the 5/6s in my down time.


  29. Oh, and it goes without saying, but your profile pic should look dangerous!

    Do not post a pic of you leaning on a car, or with golf clubs, or some other Beta, try-hard stuff… just a close-up mugshot, with a penetrating (heh) stare or smirk… eyes narrowed a little.

    That, “You lookin’ at me?!” vibe


    • The statistics say (yes, this has been scienced) that for men you shouldn’t be smiling and you should not be looking directly at the camera.


      • @[email protected] that actual pose description has been discussed in an earlier posting here


      • Yeah, I saw that post on OKTrends, and didn’t understand it at first.

        Now, after reading Heartiste et al, now I know it’s just another sign of dominance. It’s all about dominance for women, in very different ways: socially, physically, temperment, etc, etc.


  30. I was messing around on one of the dating sites and tried to write a semi jerk profile. I wanted a girl who wanted to come over and watch Gunsmoke, do a little messing around, some light housekeeping and laundry, and knew how to cook. No kids, don’t be fat and BYOB.

    Amazed at how many responses I got. True, 90% were hungry hippos, but not all of them.


  31. on June 26, 2012 at 5:41 pm Nine Furies

    Im not into the online dating thing but have some buddies both early-mid 20’s that swore by plenty of fish. Most of the chicks worth fuckin were in the 6 range and had lil bastards though.

    My boy did score a 3some( I saw video proof) with sum 7’s. One of which brought her little womb turd to his place and parked him in front of the tv while she was in the other room with her girlfriend gettin fucked.

    To guys that do this alot…..when you schedule a time to meetup online does the chick always think that your gonna pay for dinner, etc? If so how do you get around that?

    Funny story, bout 10 yrs ago I was on AOL and would troll the chat rooms. I end up talkin to this high school chick in a local chat room ( i was 21),she send me pic etc. Give her my # and she calls me right. When I talk to her Im thinkin whole time like wtf this bitch is retarded but I really wanna fuck her. So there was no vibes……but I was determined goddamit.

    She calls a couple days later and Im desperate for options to get in this broad. So basically I forced myself to get really sad and cry on the phone with her and say some bullshit sob story about god knows what. IT TOTALLY FUCKIN WORKED! The dynamic totally changed and she invited me to her place the next day and I fucked her on her lil brothers waterbed. I remember she had a belt that said princess on it lol. Btw she was hot, young n tight and this is when I had NO game. I was just absolutely determined to fuck this chick.


    • on June 26, 2012 at 6:01 pm Days of Broken Arrows

      Wait, this was my M.O.! I called it “sympathy game” a few months ago on here (below) and used it in a different context, but the idea is the same. I guess this is probably what those emo guys do, but if it works, what the hell.



      • To link to your comment you have to first click on the date and time, so that goes to the top, and then copy the address to paste the link here. What you did just links people to the top of the blog post.


    • “Womb turd”

      I like it. I take it the bastard was half black?

      Watch it Furies, that’s insensitive to our first black president.


      • on June 28, 2012 at 4:09 pm Nine Furies

        Bounder actually im not sure if the kid was half black. The womb turd line applies to any single moms(excluding widows with dead husbands) and their bastard spawn.


  32. on June 26, 2012 at 6:02 pm BlurredSevens

    The only absolute I have discovered about OkCupid messaging is this: there are no absolutes. There is no pattern, no magic bullet, no low-investment high-yield solutions. Sometimes clever one-liners or routines like the above work, sometimes elderly game works, sometimes sincere messages work. I’ve had success and failure with all kinds.

    OkCupid’s founder has publicly stated that, on average, only 33% of messages are responded to. So I would really be curious to hear from anyone that has a substantially higher response rate than average. Just because your skit worked on a few cute girls doesn’t exactly mean it’s worth waving your dick; I want to know how many other girls you burned through to get those few responses.


    • on June 27, 2012 at 4:54 am Art Vandelay

      Why would you need a higher response rate than 33%? 33% sounds pretty good to me, given that you can approach literally hundreds without any real rejection.


    • Yeah that’s just an average. While I generally agree that there are no tricks, I’ve definitely found my response rate with HOT girls is much better when I at least use some tactics. Before developing a strategy, it was slim pickings from the attractive girls, occasional attention from a 7, and the rest were plain or angle-shots.

      My advice:

      Start simple conversations that are low-investment for both of you. Avoid boring interview questions, use as much humor as you can manage. If you take a cue directly from her profile, make it creative.

      Have solid logistics and be ready to close (at your convenience) as soon as she shows more than a token interest but not before.

      Use a rating tool to find your best face shot and make that your main picture so that she’ll click on it when it shows up as a thumbnail. For the rest of your pictures, demonstrate high value (hiking shots, water-skiing, out with friends, whatever active stuff you do).

      Only message girls you want to bang (unless you want to politely reject the rest)

      But I still have no clue on the profile fields. I’ve put all kinds of random shit there and nothing seems to make a difference. In fact I’d say the best tactic if you can manage it is to change it frequently. This makes you show up in the recent activity section and you’re more likely to get hits.


    • This is basically right on the money. I’ll try burning through this opener on a few girls and will tell you the kind of response I get.

      I remember another so called “golden bullet” online opener that I tried was “Is that your real hair or a wig?”. That elicited both angered and “uuhhhh yeah” type responses. My display pic had me in long hair and a metal t shirt, so perhaps that didn’t help.


  33. Over a two-year period, I met up with about 70 chicks from online dating. As memory serves, I closed about 15-20% of them. If I’d had incredible game, or were more inspired, I probably could’ve closed 30-40%. But there are so many fish here in LA that it isn’t really necessary to chase something that ain’t workin, not when you’ve got two more girls lined up that weekend.

    Also, I don’t remember initiating much contact. Put up a great picture — get a professional to do a casual-looking one, if need be — and let them swim to you. The schools are enormous.

    Number 68, by the way, now has a ring on her finger and cooks for me every night.


  34. “You’re everything I didn’t think I wanted in a girl.”


  35. Funny … In my brief foray into online dating the only successful opener I used was when I challenged the girl on whether her profile was real.


  36. OKC is a total waste of time. Match.com is OK, but still a far cry from being out where the people are.


    • @Anon,


      OKCupid is where you go to get no strings sex, but since it’s free, the place is crawling with single-moms, chicks who are unemployed or underemployed (e.g. College educated Starbucks Barista types)

      Match is better as as it charges a nominal fee, so weeds out the total losers, making it a better place to go if you’re looking to find LTR material.


  37. A great one is “Hey I think you’re cute but before this goes any further I need to know one thing: can you make a sammich?”

    It’s a sexist as fuck but we all chicks really dig that. Also it’s a great way to screen out femcunts/icequeens.


    • on June 27, 2012 at 5:09 pm Col. Forbin

      I had a conversation that was going nowhere, so this line came out.
      The reply is perfect:
      I think you’re cute too, but I need to know something even more important: are you asking me that because you’re trying to pervade an extremely outdated, unclever, and offensive joke?


  38. didnt read the post. i simply remembered it was one of the maxims, paraphrased here: if she were high caliber, she wouldnt have to resort to with online dating.


  39. Apologies for the OT post.

    Need some advice. Similar problem with two different girls. Girl1 works at my local library. Girl2 works at a local Barnes&Noble bookstore (yeah, I like to read). G1 has a plain face, but an ass that I want to do unspeakable things to. G2 is very pretty with long legs and an ass that I want to do unspeakable things to. Both have noticed me. Both have started wearing sexy clothes in anticipation of seeing me – I’m a regular at both places. But I find the “logistics” all wrong. It’s very hard approaching either of them. G1 won’t look directly at me, and it’s so blinking quiet in the library that trying out cheesy pick up lines or otherwise getting all sexual on her ass is very difficult. G2 is more unpredictable to spot. Doesn’t have regular hours apparently (she may be a fill in). I usually see her when I’m in my easy chair reading a book and she walks by to go to the ladies room or the break room. She works the cash register and I never buy anything (broke as hell). Neither place is a club-like environment, nor even a street, day-game type of enviro. What is the best way of approaching these girls? I’ve done a little club- and street-approaching but I’m finding it especially difficult to approach in these two places. Any advice for me?


    • G1 won’t look directly at me, and it’s so blinking quiet in the library that trying out cheesy pick up lines or otherwise getting all sexual on her ass is very difficult.

      Bull shit! The disjoint between the environment and your line will totally fucking work. As long as you have a somewhat non-sexual opener at first and a big shit eating grin on your face.


    • Stop making excuses.


      B&N is a grade-A meat market in my town.


    • on June 27, 2012 at 12:35 am Days of Broken Arrows

      G1 won’t look directly at me…

      Not a good sign, move on emotionally and maybe she’ll come round and act like an adult.

      G2 is more unpredictable… she works the cash register and I never buy anything (broke as hell).

      Use this to your advantage. This is what I used to do. When you see her walking by for a bathroom break, do the following. Say “Hey!” as if you’re gonna flirt. Keep that mood when she says hi back. When the time comes that she’d expect you to ask her out, surprise her — tell her you forgot your wallet (or money), and you’re short for coffee or a snack, so can you borrow a buck? You need to do the latter with sort of a sheepish “aw shucks” expression. Set this up so she anticipates one thing but gets another.

      If this works like it did for me, she’ll laugh and give you the dollar (you can make this a quarter if you’re uncomfortable asking for a buck). Either way most women like to help out. This, then, opens the floor for fun conversation from which you can escalate. She’ll probably see you again and make a crack about you being a pauper and you can quote Shakespeare “Neither a borrower nor a lender be.” You can pay her back with “interest,” asking her to coffee. Take it from there.

      I used to actually do this regularly in my college dorm. We had a vending machine in the lobby and I’d make like I was gonna chat up a girl, then spring on her I wanted Combos or a Three Musketeers. Sometimes we’d end up sharing the snack.

      One time at a Fourth of July celebration I mooched a girl’s snack, then her beer, then jokingly asked if I could borrow $20. Her response? “Only if you spend it on me.”


      • The origin of all the many thousands of idiots with boyfriends “who stayed on my couch smoking pot all day, slapped me around, took money from my wallet, raped my ass, and fucked my little sister in her playpen” — and broke up with only two years thereafter. Unsuccessfully.


    • Thanks all.


    • 1- They’re not dressing up for you. Don’t be delusional.

      2- B&N is one of the better, perhaps best places left for day game. They’re at their most relaxed, thus in a more receptive state to a creative approach.

      I used to open them by asking, in a playful, confidential tone, if they make fun of customers on their two-way radios. “Come on, you know you do. Admit it. Like that slob over there in sweats reading a graphic novel.” Of course they do, but by calling them out you’ll have gently embarrassed them and established a certain intimacy.

      And the library. I know the silence is daunting but you just have to wait around as inconspicuously as possible for the sweet moment when all the Fifty Shades of Fuckwitted slags and their loudmouthed melungeon spawn have checked out their shite reading material, and the creeping head librarian twat has crept back to the office to “operate the printer machine” or something. She will be available to you for no more than a minute, and you’d better be in top form and have a world-class opener, ’cause by your second line, another gaggle of morose slackjawed retards will have collected behind you. G1 will be disastrously uncomfortable unless you are as cool and funny as fucking Heartiste himself.

      DO NOT corner her in the fucking stacks. Just don’t. You’re not Casanova and only Casanova can make that work. What you can do is ask her to help you find something. If she’s the helpful type she will do so unbidden, and then you’re on.


  40. So let me get this straight… All software engineers that work in the online dating space will just bend over backwards for a member of that site just so they have an outside shot at bad poon?

    You sure don’t know much about quality software engineers, do you?


  41. any advice for on choosing a username?


    • @aopl,

      Make it non-sexual – that’s key – and then either informative, mysterious or fun – I usually go with informative, as it more bang for the buck…

      Something like:



  42. I have been abusing the shit out of this “are you a girl” gambit–works like freaking catnip–my inbox is lighting up. Wow, so–my impression of girls has gone even lower (if possible)–thanks guys–but, hey, if I get the bang it’s worth it–one chick even responded by saying “well-played.” LOL.


  43. on June 26, 2012 at 10:57 pm Dan Fletcher

    Bill Murray, using his fame cred to slay random hoodrats without lifting a finger.

    Murray, cutting down slores(read between the lines)

    Fame, the game panacea.


  44. on June 26, 2012 at 11:14 pm Dan Fletcher

    How about a program like this to extradite the process…

    A script crawls the OKCupid(or whatever dating site) for broads in your area. It extracts all the pictures of girls within a certain age range. It then presents those pictures to you rapid-fire with two buttons labeled “Would bang” and “Wouldn’t bang”. If you select “Would bang” it automatically sends out a proven boilerplate like the one prescribed in this article. You could check out 50+ profiles in a minutes this way.

    When a girl replies, you would be alerted through email to review her response. You could then choose between some automated boilerplate responses to common replies to your initial message or write a custom message if required.

    Then plow.


  45. Yep, pretty much.


  46. Somewhat sad reality and I am just stumped


  47. True story, about 6 months ago I did an interesting experiment where I took photos of an attractive slender girl off Facebook, and posed as that woman on POF dating site. I wanted to see how much attention these girls really get, as I myself had a free profile up on the site but had received no messages from chicks, only gay dudes.

    Holy smokes, about 3 messages per minute came tumbling in for the first hour. I woke up the next day and saw over 150 unread messages. Pretty much all from unoriginal beta chumps who all say the same thing.

    Again, I had my profile up for 3 months and had NOT ONE message, and I’m a clean, above-avg looking dude.

    I totally agree this is a huge ego boost and there’s likely many many women who use online dating just for this aspect alone.

    It’s mindblowing the differences in experiences young men and young women have in society today. I don’t think most men could even comprehend getting that much attention from the opposite sex over the course of 10 years, let alone one day.

    Young men are completely shat on, told they are expendable for wars, that they should work 60 hr weeks to provide for a wife who whored it out for every thug du jour in college, that they should beg for their two pence of pussy, that they should pay tens of thousands in taxes every year to redistribute to single mothers who acted on hypergamous impulses but who still continue to ignore the hardworking 35 yr old who would give up all his money to have any sort of female attention or family.


    • I call it scaling illusion. Same thing happens with resumes. 5 applicants and 5 jobs = 25 resumes. 100 applicants and 100 jobs = 10000 resumes. Each hiring manager thinks they are sitting on a stack of 100 resumes. The resume represents respectively 1/5 to 1/100 of available man power but those who have little experience in the matter may not know they may not even be in the market any longer. Same thing with women. Men issue their attention in these fragments, and now that they can mechanically reproduce it, women are sitting on a big stack of fractional male attention.

      I believe I have a high success percentage in many of the things I have attempted because I never just played the game straight when it was rigged against me. I fucking hate house rules and gambling with my own money. I don’t even care much for a fair fight. It does not take long to take loses on a 50-50 chance. Go with your edge. If you gotta, go where the game is rigged against them like an American overseas or ball room dancing. But for the love of Zeus don’t sent an email of “hi my name is Mike” to a hot girl on a dating site.


  48. In terms of opening a chick on OKCupid, just don’t be like the herd, and try and be a little creative.

    So for instance I opened a minor porn star with,
    Me: “Have you ever thought of working on the other side of the camera, like doing some production work?”
    PS: “You’re the first guy who has asked me that! Usually guys ask me how big my ass is, or do I do anal”
    Me: “We’ll talk about those issues too… just not now…”
    PS: “Okay! (laughing)

    The chick lived in CT and wanted me to go there to meetup, but I said no way, she’d have to come to the city to meet me. Two weeks later she did, and called me to say she was with a gf at some bar in midtown, and they had a hotel room. That’s when I chickened out, as I decided that I didn’t really need to fuck a pornstar. But just to keep the channels open, I said my daughter was sick and so I couldn’t meet her. She liked me even more because of that, and kept in touch for a month or so. Then she moved to LA, in with 2 gf’s of hers, who happened to be major porn stars. Better still she invited me to come visit them, but again I declined – not really my cup of tea.


    • Sounds like you might be gay.


      • @Gendo

        lol – yeah I can see how it might sound gay.

        But another fact that I didn’t mention above, was that I googled her handle and found a livejournal website where she chronicled everything about her various trysts. The day she was in NYC to meetup she had written:
        “On my way to the city to meet a cool guy, more details to follow…”

        But hey, maybe I should have let it slide, who knows?

        The chick herself was Columbia educated, and now runs a high end literary blog


      • A minor porn star who was Columbia educated an now runs a high end literary blog???

        You don’t see that every day.


      • @Doug,

        Yeah, she was one of those feminist “sex positive” types. She also worked as a reviewer of porn for AVN, and her write-ups were very funny/witty.

        It so happened that she actually studied film in Columbia, and while trying to get into film, she got into porn. I accidentally hit the nail on the head, right off the bat…

        She came from a wealthy background in Fairfield, CT


      • Intriguing. I would have gone for it.

        Breast implants?

        How hot?


      • @Doug,

        Since I didn’t meet her in person, I’m just going off of her pics, but I’d say a 7 face and 9 bod, all tits-n-ass…

        Yeah, it’s amazing who you can meet online


      • Shit man, can’t say I blame you. I wouldn’t want to end up on some publicly viewable fucklog, but if she kept shit anonymous, I might be willing to let it slide a little. Its just one more thing to tease her about.


    • “Have you ever thought of working on the other side of the camera”

      That could be a good general purpose opener-neg for any girl who seems to thrive on being photographed.


      • @x2d4d,

        Right, it’s sort of a neg, as it de-focuses from her physical assets, and it also follows the old maxim:
        “Tell a beautiful woman she’s smart, tell a smart woman she’s beautiful”


    • on June 28, 2012 at 5:06 am Original JB

      Haha…Heartiste reframes “Have you ever thought of working on the other side of the camera, like doing some production work?” as a neg. Damn, he doesn’t miss a trick…:)


  49. Don’t know about this site. But I have had a lot of luck with the following approach: “With the right person…” in the headline. “…anything can happen” in the body. I list out a bit of myself, then I’m specific about what I’m looking for: slim, petite, etc etc. Ending with “With the right person…it could be magic”.

    I have had tremendous responses to this and same night bang after getting a respoinse tfrom a girl who qualified herself with the description. Turned out to be quite cute, fit etc.

    Another girl I didn’t meet because she was looking for a “serious relationship” sexted me saying she had a “rubber cock with her right now..” Me: Big deal, I have a real one.


  50. “Just wanted to say I find you very attractive. If I got to know you, I would invite you over for a romantic dinner and as soon as you arrived, I would pull you close and whisper in your ear “I have a swanson tv dinner in the freezer with your name on it” and then I would proceed to fill a wine glass with welch’s grape juice”

    “Hey shawty. lemme holla at you right quick ya know what im sayin. checkin you out over there you lookin kinda good, ya know what im sayin. so i was wondering ya know how about you and me go back to the place, get comfortable, probably sip on some of this henney, you know what im sayin, and after that, you know what im… sayin, we can do the grownup and you can let me clap on dem cheeks, ya hear me?”


  51. One that I use that actually came from a genuine suspicion is this;

    “I was having a debate with a friend of mine about natural red heads and I was
    wondering if you could shed any light on it with your first hand experience.

    I claimed that through high school guys will have teased you about being a ginger and wouldn’t have shown much interest but once you hit 18 suddenly they compliment you about being a red head and are very interested.

    Did you notice this change in male attention?”

    Obviously it only applies to natural red heads but as I (and I think most men) have a thing for them it’s a good way to open them. Even if you send it to a girl that has dyed her hair red/ginger she will usually respond and then you can ask if she noticed a change after dying it.


  52. Naughty Ninja from sosuave gave me this okcupid gambit: “I would personally beatbox the entire Justin Bieber song catalog on national television just to share a romantic Chef-Boyardee spaghetti dinner with you over a dial up connection…But that’s beside the point..Congratulations are in order here. If I ever meet the owner of OkCupid I’m going to demand to him that you be paid for your profile! For a free dating site, yours is THE greatest profile ever written in the history of online dating!

    I swear I’m going to print it out and post it on my fridge to admire…FOREVER..

    Keep up the good work you adorable, heavenly blessed lil cutie!

    Ciao bella and I hope you have a great day. =)”

    I modified it a bit and tried it out… It does work to pique interest.

    I also tried “the bet” gambit you wrote about today, and it works even better imo (although, as luck would have it, I apparently sent it to two cute girls who are housemates with each other, so now they’re giving me shit about it…)


    • And you’re allowing them to give you shit, instead of going with “You actually live together? I think I’ve lost both bets!”


  53. Ive been on okcupid before, its pretty decent, they have it dressed up to attract women with personality quizzes and articles, and a girly design of the site which makes women want to hang out, not like say plenty of fish that kind of looked like someones basement. The best site ive used though is one called militarycupid (Im not in the military). To me the methodology they have is the genius part. Basically to contact a member you have to pay a monthly fee, so generally speaking its almost all men who pay and women hang out and meet men for free. Now there are about equal numbers of mens and womens profiles, but only about half of the men are paid and can send a message or talk…so all of a sudden the women actually have to work for a guys attention(game concept – women like a challenge not a sausage fest). Add that to the fact that it is an interesting type of woman who is turned on by men who are willing to die for their country (a lot of nurses and southern belle big family types), and you have an excellent site for meeting women no excessive work or canned lines needed. And I think the military guys on there seem to have no game so a person can really stand out. The big negative is that people tend to be far away. I dont use the website anymore because I still prefer foreign women, but I was impressed with the quality of the women and how well the concept worked. im 34 and I was talking to all kinds of hot 18 years olds which are usually the hardest ones to get the attention of on sites like okcupid.


    • Interesting. Nice to know with all the crap soldiers go through at least you have a site where you can get pussy 😉


    • This is pretty similar to some ideas I’d had for a dating website. Except I’d envisaged joining the site as being free, and then there’s a monthly/daily limit on the number of messages you can send (based on the number you’ve recieved), and the number of messages you can recieve (based on the number you’ve sent). This would hopefully discourage girls from hanging out there and recieving adoration from fanboys, because if they never reply, other prospective suitors get a: ‘this person cannot recieve any more messages as their reply ratio is too low’

      I notice OkCupid have introduced a ‘lite,’ social-enforcement version of this, where girls have a little dot next to their profile which says how likely she is to reply to messages. Most girls it’s red: ‘very unlikely to reply’.


  54. Solid 8, 25yrs, appears very bright and cheerful. She showed up in my visitor list and I opened:

    Me: You’re entirely too smiley. I bet I could bore that grin off your face in no time.

    Her(2hrs later): Haha – we’ll see about that 🙂

    I haven’t answered yet. I have a few follow-ups in mind but I figured I’d see if the Chateau has better ideas.


    • “Did you steal my toothbruth? ;)”

      “Don’t forget your dentist appointment!!! Bring me something good from the treasure box. You better not have cavities.”

      “Which is better: Colgate or Crest. A man’s life hangs in the balance.”


    • on June 27, 2012 at 2:21 pm Days of Broken Arrows

      As cute as Kate’s comment is, I don’t think you should use it. You already went for cute. She’ll expect that and…yawn.

      You need a change-up. I’d go with something a bit serious, maybe a comment on something political on here page. One sentence, like “You really think OWS is making a difference?” When she engaged in earnest “Yes! I do!!” that’s when you go back to cute.

      You need to engage her emotionally, be interesting and get her thinking “Wait, this is different, what is this guy about?” A bit of unpredictability is the way to do that. This works IRL too. If you’re Mr. Funny, you need to get serious once in a while.


      • Your toothpaste may vary. I tend to the silly 🙂


      • Hmm I like this one, though there is virtually nothing serious in her profile except the mention of her occupation.

        Anyway I picked one of the “6 things I can’t do without” listed in her profile and told her to write me a 500 word essay about it, due Monday, and in the question included the words “hot” and “tongue” with plausible deniability.


  55. This greeted me when I fired up my computer this morning. I almost had a rage induced blackout. http://news.yahoo.com/girls-science-campaign-lipstick-no-lab-coats-video-134713389.html


  56. on June 27, 2012 at 10:00 am someguy302004

    Haha. I’ve used that accusation too- it works…

    I generally get about a half of the girls I date from there. The other half– bookstores and the street. The latter half generally produces better dates, but it’s good to have options…

    The big drawback re the quality of women from Okc is that, at least for me, I run into shyer women, and when I do the coffee date and she’s cardboard, I bail quickly.

    There aren’t many quality women, so quantity– with needed breaks of not dating is all I can do.


    • This is the second time shyness has been commented on. I’ll reply here. Online is the perfect place for a shy person because it takes most of the nervousness out of meeting new people. An introvert could be a quality person but just not into the standard social scene, or have other obligations that prevent them from joining in.

      Much of what is being written here is to advace things as quickly as possible. And if your goal is something for that night or fairly soon, I suppose that’s the route to take. But, if you are really looking for a quality girl, you’ll have to put in time getting to know her.

      Shy/quiet girls are more likely going to be the ones who have the traits of loyalty, sincerity, etc. that you are looking for, so it might be worth putting in the extra effort if that is your goal. Hesitation to toss out phone numbers like beads at Marti Gras or meet in person quickly should actually be an indication that you’ve stumbled upon someone worth knowing, not that they aren’t interested.


      • on June 27, 2012 at 1:39 pm someguy302004

        All I was implying was that I don’t have patience for shy/uptight girls…and that there’s a disproportionate number of them online. I’m not gonna pull teeth to get good conversation out of an uptight girl (I’m not a dentist!)

        The fun ones may have a higher chance of being train wrecks, but, to be honest, the rare, rare fun ones I’ve sorta had as short term girlfriends (4-6 months) really were both in therapy or on meds, not classic gf material, and fun in bed.

        Maybe I don’t want quality in the classic sense, but fun and not frigid..


      • Whatever whitens your teeth 🙂


      • Shy girls are better for LTR and worse for one-night stands. What are most of the commenters here interested in? 😉


      • 🙂


      • Probably statistically, but it’s not going to be close to an absolute I don’t think.


  57. “but a buddy of mine was looking over my shoulder just now and claimed that…”

    What if you changed this to “but a lady/female friend of mine…”

    So instead of two dudes around a monitor there’s a female/social proof. Also the source of the accusation will be more credible (or maybe not but you know what I mean).


  58. Just field-tested “Are you a girl?” on OKCupid.

    Great response rate — about 50% in 12 hours. High return for such a low investment.

    Sample of responses:
    Hehehehe…. I am not really a GiRl, i am a lady….
    hahaha yes i am di i look gay?!
    no. im a woman
    So you mean that I’m a man then?
    ha. So you’re asking if I’m a man? Nope, not since the last time I checked.


  59. ok: I signed up for this and replied with “Are you really a girl?”

    First girl who replied: “wtf? go fk urself”

    Me: “yup…you’re a girl…”


  60. Decent but gamey and try-hard, imho. It’s so obviously just a pretense to qualify for her. My initial messages are usually borderline insulting with a push-pull-push, Things like…. “You look bat-shit crazy with those wild staring eyes. Nice hair, cute, feminine. But if you try to get into my garden, I’ll chase you out with a rolled-up newspaper. Weirdo.”


    • @Krauser,

      That’s funny stuff!

      I knew a guy who IRL would approach girls in bars with the line,
      “You look like you just got out of prison!”

      He said he always got a positive reaction and a comment. He would then launch into a little story of his own about a short stint – a week or so for some misdemenour – he spent in jail in his teen years, and it was game on from there…


    • on June 27, 2012 at 7:53 pm BlurredSevens

      Now that is fucking priceless. Love the push-pull-push style, I will have to try that.

      Only issue here is congruency – seems like a losing battle trying to keep up that level of unpredictability and wittiness, especially once you get her out. But maybe not?


      • Yea, doesn’t work. One must be actually mad, a born dadaist, to keep it up for so long — and still lose to the fat, bearded Jew pothead who played Theremin on a Ween album twenty years ago.


      • No. You are getting her attention and showing hard dominance, creative intelligence, and fun. A few interchanges like this and look for her to be a bit real and seek some rapport. Then tone it down and let her in a little.

        The aim is to gradually reduce the humour and increase the realness / comfort until you feel you’ve got the strong hook. Then push for a date. On the date itself, run your normal style.


  61. I tried this and got 3 out 6 replies on POF.


  62. The fuck is up with no one using the word “friend” anymore?

    Everything is “buddy” this and “buddy” that, “buddy” of mine, “buddy” of yours.


  63. In my experience (or at least in my city), okcupid has more “cute” girls who would possibly make girlfriend material, but they are harder to build rapport with. POF has more low investment (ie: stupid/boring) hottie types but also has much larger swarths of warpigs and uglies.

    I have had zero success with o.k cupid. It’s much harder to even get girls to respond back to an email. With plentyoffish I have pulled a few numbers but never worked up the nerve to call the girls (more like high standards amirite).

    okcupid seems to pander much more to females, so perhaps it fattens their ego. There are apps, quizzes and other trinkets to help her celebrate her inner unique snowflakeness,ect.


  64. I’ve been asking ugly chicks if they’re post-op. Not the same effect, but love giving the hamster a flick as it treads in place.


  65. Girl: So what do you do for fun?
    Uh: I like to get down Patrick Bateman style.
    Girl: ??
    Uh: Literary reference. Went over your head.
    Girl: (looking dumb)



  66. Update:

    Here are some opening lines and responses.

    Of the 10 chicks I contacted 4 replied.

    Here’s how it went down:

    “You seem interesting…

    Her: Why!??

    Me: With the right person, anything can happen

    Her: I agree to an extent, what are you trying to say?

    Me: (GOING DIRECT) I’m a puzzle to most women. I can be sensual or wild. If there’s chemistry, I like to explore.


    Me: Are you really a girl?

    Her: You think Im really a boy!??

    Me: With that brief profile, I’ll need more proof…Intersted in finding someone chill, let’s hang out…


    Still awaiting replies back to this. But it’s a blast. I can hear that hamster wheel spinning…


    • Further update…here are some other responses: ”

      HAHAHAHAHA, yep i m a girl
      why would i wanna pretend to be a girl here?
      i m not good at describing myself so nth much to write

      ME: “I may need further proof….” game as normal


      Other successful repies:

      “You seem….interesting. With the right person anything can happen”


      “You are quite mysterious!!!!!!

      Me: “Proceed with caution…” game as per normal

      Reply: “You seem interesting, what are 3 things that would make me want to know you more?”

      Sample replies:

      “What are 3 things about you?”

      Me: “Ohhhhhhhh, you’re one of those girls”


      Sample reply to “What are 3 things that would make me want to know you more?”

      Her: 1) I’m crazy 2) adventurous 3) I’m super


      Somehow a one word reply to theses ads works better than a full introduction.

      Call it “Tweet game”?


      • Further update: using the “are you really a girl?
        and my adapted; “you seem interesting…with the right person anything can happen”

        I reached out to 30 women, 15 replied, i have 5 numbers, of those 2 are domestic helpers, one is a 22 year old flight attendant who I gamed simply by writing: “Chicken or fish?” and that lead to a number close.

        I have 2 things meet ups set for this weekend….

        The old me would have replied with some beta description….now it’s almost a sentence.

        After I get a reply, I qualify them: ‘give me 3 reasons why I would want to get to know you better”? several have replied and given me reasons. Two have asked “you go first” to which I replied “ohhh, you’re one of those girls” or just not replied….

        One asked me to send my “dick pic” to which I replied:

        “better in real, ” followed by: “B==============> “


  67. Sampling this opener on 25 Vancouverian cuties, will post back findings.


    • So, sent about 30 and got about 7 back rapidly, this one was pretty funny:
      “My only question for you is how many other girls you’ve sent that exact same message to.”


      • The lesson is: smart chicks requirer personalized responses.


      • It’s like the stock market. It worked the first time, but now that it’s out there, people figure it out and it doesn’t work anymore.


      • Great point. The opener may work on a good number of girls, but after a few hundred lurkers on heartiste start sending it, good luck.

        Pretty much like any game technique, once it shows up on the first page of Google, there’ll be articles in Cosmo and Marie Claire and then only the girls who don’t read at all will know the gambit.


      • Where I live there are more smart chicks than not. If you copy/paste it has to be really good.

        But still, a response is still a response. My answer in that case would be a bluntly honest number.


    • I had another girl respond with “LOL already got this one”. But so far the responses have been really good.


  68. Ok, I put up a post with screencaps of 5 conversations I recently had where I’m just trolling smoking hot Russian girls.


    • Now, try getting them on a real date Krauser. You display typical flash game, most PUAs do. Their responses mean nothing. Its the equivalent of opening a set, bantering 15 -20 mins and getting their BTs high. Unless they feel emotionally invested they are not coming out with you. Period.


      • Show me your magic, magic man


      • typical. I will, but when you stop getting giddy and posting conversations of women from behind a keyboard and calling it ‘Online Game’. cock still not in pussy, son


      • are you not familiar with the fact that krauser posts LIVE PICKUPS all the time? or is that what you mean by flash game? would you rather he has a reality show with a camera attached to the head of his penis so you can see him actually fucking the girls he talks to, before you give him any credit?

        [heartiste: yeah, i was wondering about this hater’s reasoning too. krauser, as far as i know, is one of the few pickup guys who used to upload vids of his actual lays to his website. now, i think that’s a bad idea, but you can’t accuse the guy of faking the funk.]


      • Hang on, I am not questioning his PU skills. I am just saying this way of banter *usually* gets no where. Its fun, its laced with BT spikes, makes the woman feel good but unless the girl is emotionally invested from a prior meet I see no reason for these actually transitioning in to solid dates. Poor strategy IMO.


  69. So I used to dabble in online dating and reactivated my account just to copypasta that email to a bunch of 7s and above. I emailed 29 and got 20 responses. The ones who haven’t responded apparently haven’t logged on.

    Most of the girls reacted to the being a guy accusation and excused it by saying they were one of the guys or had brothers, etc… It’s really fun to see that the hottest ones had the bitchiest responses:

    “Make sure you get your $20”

    “You win! What are the dead giveaways? I don’t want to sound like a guy.”
    “I def relate better to guys than girls and validates what I’ve recently realized about yourself. Collect your $20.”

    “Well, your profile has lots of details, does this mean you’re a girl?”

    “Last time I checked I don’t have a dick.”

    “I doubt you have a $20 bet going but yes I am a girl”

    “Rest assured. I am a girl. Tell your buddy to pay up. I’ve always been known as one of the guys. I am an only girl with three older brothers.”

    “Well, you win the bet, I am most certainly a girl… wear dresses, can walk with 6” heels, I cry when people get married… I’m a total chick!”

    “Great pick up line.”

    “I have the same name as an NFL quarterback. Needless to say I have been proving people wrong my entire life. Obviously you don’t think I’m dumb enough to meet in person so you could use this “bet” as a sneaky way to lure me into an unwanted date with you. I’m sure you have thought of a more practical solution (that doesn’t involve naked pictures) so I am happy to entertain your proposal, within reason. This does not mean that I am interested in you, it simply means I am up for a challenge. What have you got?”


  70. I just opened an okcupid profile, did not post a picture or fill in ANY of the profile page… left it blank. I proceeded to cut and paste the above form email and sent one and only one to a solid 7. Received a lengthy and positive response in three hours. That “are you a girl?” shit is gold.


  71. It’s been working great for me too but lets try and take it easy with this opener. Over half of the chicks I’ve sent this too have replied as well, with varying degrees of interest, but two of them mentioned getting a number of “are you a girl?” messages “all starting yesterday, weird huh?”. It didn’t impact the interest of the ones I talked too but it’s quickly becoming known. I’m as guilty as the next guy of copying this material but from now on I will try and use it as a frame work to form my own openers.

    All that aside, one of the replies I got with this was just too funny not to share.

    German Girl: “A man makes the profile for me. He helps me, because my englisch is not good. I use online translator now, but my profile more natural wanted.

    This is why, online I seek. Easier communications….”

    I’ve got a date with this 7 later next week, should be interesting!


  72. one word, day game


  73. on June 29, 2012 at 2:19 pm futureAlpha

    So I admit it; I copypasta’d this and it has gotten me more responses than writing my usual beta-style, hand-crafted messages. But I’m at a loss for how best to follow it up. At 43, after a 20-year marriage, I’m working hard to de-beta myself but man, there is a hell of a lot to learn. Tips welcome.


    • This blog’s archives is a great place to learn game. For starters, have as a background mindset to pretty much do the opposite of what feminists (except sometimes sex positive feminists in a few areas) say is necessary.

      Playful teasing, called negging in game circles, is the ticket, with more of it the hotter she is and or she thinks she is. Also a sense of bemusement towards women, and never supplication. Have the girl buy you the first drink, or at the least say “I’ll get this round, but you get the next. What are you having?”

      For starters do a google site search here on “Relationship Game Week Dave from Hawaii”. Oh hell, here you go:

      Then read the prior post in that week: agree and amplify. Then read the rest of the week.

      I realize you sound like you’re dating rather than in a relationship, but he relationship game week is some of the best succinct basic game, rather than lots of emphasis on bar pickup etc.

      Then I’d start with Heartiste’s archives beginning at the start of 2008. 2008-10 was probably the strongest freshest parts of the blog, and the most game dense, not that it isn’t often still good.


  74. Got some pretty negative/defensive response. I guess shit would be different if my pictures where more alpha.


  75. […] Heartiste – Never Listen to A Feminist’s Opinion . . . , OkCupid Corruption,  Kevin Smith Game, Feminism Is Making Americans […]


  76. […] OkCupid Corruption & Online Dating Tactic […]


  77. “What I like “most” about that Deathstroke cover: There’s the teeny-tiny head, nonsensical muscles and stumpy legs, incompetently drawn sword AND gun, pouches and pouches in exchange for anything resembling actually posible posing or anatomy, and a 100% feet free cover. And yet the “artiste” felt it nessecary to add a huge, obtrusive signature. Because NO ONE could have known it was an original Liefeld otherwise.”


  78. that “$20 bet” message gets consistent quality responses. would buy that guy a drink.