Cutter Lover

We were laying down side by side on her bed mid-afternoon. It was muggy in her small and untidy bedroom because her window unit A/C wasn’t working properly. She was naked and I was resting my left hand on her mons pubis, as if it were the lacquered mahogany end of an arm rest. This was the first time she exhibited her naked body to me under the shadowless light of daytime. Every dimple and flaw she no doubt imbued with outsized importance was freely visible to my appreciative eyes. Before this moment, sex was a nighttime activity only.

As we lied on the bed staring at the ceiling and her collection of carved giraffes on her bookshelf, my hand wandered down her thigh. A geometric pattern of tiny raised obstacles tickled my palm. I looked over at her leg where my hand was perched and saw three thin reddish-purple lines, barely a millimeter in width but each more than three inches long, carved into the flank of her thigh and hip like claw marks from the angry swipe of a cat.

“What’s that?”

“Oh, these?”

“Yep. It looks like a cat got you.”

She steadied her gaze and paused, an odd hesitation that told me she was quickly weighing the options of lying or telling the truth. “I… they’re cut marks.”

“Cut marks?”

“Not from anything. I did them to myself.”

“You cut yourself? With a razor blade?”

“Yeah, I use a blade from my leg razor.”

“Oookay.” I moved my hand away and focused on her slim vulva and then her face. “That’s strange. Why?”

“It helps when I’m feeling crappy. I get into these moods, and the only way I can feel better is by cutting myself.”

“So hurting yourself makes you feel better.”

“Yeah, I know it sounds crazy. Don’t be a judgy jerk about this.”

“It is crazy. Why not try running to lift your mood? Or alcohol? It won’t leave scars.”

“There are no scars. I make sure not to do it too deep to leave a scar.”

“Does anyone else know about this?”

“No, just you. Although my mom once saw the marks and I lied to her about them.”

I fingered the congealed blood of the narrow cuts. “You do them on parts of your body that won’t normally be seen in public.”

“Yep.”

“And you’ve been doing this a long time?”

“Since ninth grade.”

“Are you depressed?”

“You know I get depressed sometimes.” She waved a hand at her superficial wounds. “This helps me cope.”

“We need to find you a new coping mechanism. I like your skin to stay silky smooth.”

I never talked about the cutting with her again. Fact is, it didn’t much bother me. We were together for another nine months or so, and the sex was always hot. She was up for it anywhere, anytime. Like me, she especially liked doing it in front of mirrors. She had an incredibly high libido even for a crazy chick. I briefly wondered if it was the inherent drama in our relationship and my flirtatious ways with other women which caused her to cut, but she never did it again while we were together, as far as I could tell. (The possibility exists she found a harder-to-locate patch of land somewhere in the nooks of her body to hide her cutting from me. But I’m pretty thorough when it comes to exploring the savannah of a lover’s body.) I believed her when she said she cut to feel better. As a man, I can understand the impulse. We men often relish the pain of crunching blows from fights or sports or body blows from self-discovery adventures gone awry. Testosterone makes us men want to feel life for all it’s worth, and there’s no better mental stimulant than the physical stimulants of pain and sex.

But not too much pain. We’ve got our pretty boy faces to keep in mind.

Pain takes us men out of our minds, away from debilitating introspection and toward living in the moment. Maybe for some women, pain from cutting performs a similar psychological analgesic for them, taking them away from worries and stress and into their exquisite bodies where their truest womanhood resides.

***

Do women, then, cut because of negative emotions filling their hearts? A study states it is so, drawing relevance with ancient religious practices of self-flagellation to cleanse the soul of impurities.

Psychological scientist Brock Bastian of the University of Queensland, Australia and his colleagues recruited a group of young men and women under the guise they were part of a study of mental and physical acuity. Under this pretense, they asked them to write short essays about a time in their lives when they had ostracized someone; this memory of being unkind was intended to prime their personal sense of immorality—and make them feel guilty. A control group merely wrote about a routine event in their lives.

Afterward, the scientists told some of the volunteers—both “immoral” volunteers and controls—to stick their hand into a bucket of ice water and keep it there as long as they could. Others did the same, only with a soothing bucket of warm water. Finally, all the volunteers rated the pain they had just experienced—if any—and they completed an emotional inventory that included feelings of guilt.

The idea was to see if immoral thinking caused the volunteers to subject themselves to more pain, and if this pain did indeed alleviate their resulting feelings of guilt. And that’s exactly what the researchers found. Those who were primed to think of their own unethical nature not only kept their hands in the ice bath longer, they also rated the experience as more painful than did controls. What’s more, experiencing pain did reduce these volunteers’ feelings of guilt—more than the comparable but painless experience with warm water.

According to the scientists, although we think of pain as purely physical in nature, in fact we imbue the unpleasant sensation with meaning. Humans have been socialized over ages to think of pain in terms of justice. We equate it with punishment, and as the experimental results suggest, the experience has the psychological effect of rebalancing the scales of justice—and therefore resolving guilt.

Guilt is one emotion that can be absolved by the self-administration of pain. I wouldn’t be surprised if pain lessened the burden of other negative emotions as well. My cutter lover may have felt guilt about spending the best years of her life with a man who gave no hint of driving the relationship toward a marital resolution, and being unable to extricate herself because of her attachment to me. Or she may have just been a naturally depressive person, inherited from some long ago depressed ancestor, and cutting was her cheap Prozac.

The most important lesson I took away from that relationship was that cutters are a great lay. I now look for the telltale signs on all first dates. If the cuts are on her face, I know she’ll be wearing no panties underneath her skirt and will be ready to fuck in an alleyway before we’re even halfway home.





Comments


  1. “I took away from that relationship was that cutters are a great lay.”

    Depends what kind. I’d avoid the Catherine Becker kind.

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  2. It may be insensitive, but I find “cutting” to be terribly cliche.

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  3. Cutting is not a big deal, plenty of women do it.

    I’ve never been able to pinpoint the “why” because there’s so much variety, but in the end, women seem to love drama and attention, and that’s my default answer when I am uncertain as to the reasons behind some women’s “crazy” actions.

    I’ll agree, though: cutters are crazy in bed, but probably not the gals you want to introduce to your inner circle, ever. Introduce them to other women solely for social proof (someone who loves drama and attention and is crazy in bed tends to be hot superficially), but keep them away from your regulars.

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  4. on July 15, 2011 at 3:22 pm Emma the Emo

    I cut myself before. Did it first when I was 11. Then at 13 I did that to decorate myself and did a few tattoos, which I think can be a way to self-harm as well. Later, I also cut myself just for the heck of it, even when not feeling anything negative, out of boredom. But I also cut myself when another girl was depressed and I suffered with her and we both cut ourselves. I think cutting can have many reasons behind it.

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  5. “Pain takes us men out of our minds, away from debilitating introspection and toward living in the moment. ”

    Truer words have rarely been spoken.

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  6. Trying to capture a more female audience with the romance novella-style story bit? You know all they do is pollute the comments, right?

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  7. Swipple “males” welcoming brown parasites into their home, bank account etc.
    Chicks cutting themselves.

    Just use a fucking gun.

    btw, how many BLACK chicks are cutters…
    (cutting themselves, cutting others people don’t count ya’ll)

    My guess: 000.01

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  8. Good way to handle this: Forbid the cutting, give regular spankings. See: Secretary, the movie.

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  9. Cutting combines the transgressive and the self-destructive. That combo makes for wild, expressive acting out in bed too.

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  10. Usually implies emotional imbalances.

    Unbalanced women are always the best in bed.

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  11. Indeed, the two cutters I dated were fantastic in bed. The level of drama seeking behavior from those women was the highest I ever experienced though. I would be impressed with someone who can have a stable long term relationship with this kind of woman.

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    • I dated a cutter (see below) for a year and a half. Afterwards a few people told me: “I can’t believe you were able to date her for so long.” She had a lot going for her, but yeah… drama seeking. You may now be impressed. I held down the drama. Kept it where it belonged (in my bed + my art).

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  12. I dated a reformed cutter (she had the good taste to stop doing it after high school). She was a very good lay. I wish she could have been a happier person. That is all.

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  13. i learn new vocabs everytime i read a post

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  14. Ditto on cutters being bedroom cut-ups, but unstable. These women also cut off all their hair sometimes for the same reason.

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  15. I used to do lots of self-harming (though things a bit stranger than cutting), since elementary school. I only stopped recently, but I still occasionally can’t resist the urge.
    It really helped me to deal with fear/anxiety and shame, but it was also useful to improve my concentration when I had to study a lot. It even helped me to ease my back pain. I know it sounds weird, but it works. Even against migraine or tiredness. I don’t recommend it though. There are many better ways to deal with stress/pain/fear/shame.
    I don’t do that anymore, especially not on my face, because I think I’ve already permanently lowered my SMV with doing this shit … I’m sad sometimes because of this, but I try to accept I had no other way to deal with my painful emotions when I was younger.
    I agree with one commenter above saying that cutting is common. When I was a teenager it wasn’t so common, but now many girls do that, unfortunately.
    As far as I know it’s a kind of OCD/anxiety disorder, but for me, as I said, it was much more – it helped me to deal with just any unpleasant emotion.
    I also used it to “punish” myself, not to reduce the feeling of guilt (I was always a nice girl, never doing anything wrong, so I had no reason to feel guilty), but rather my chronic feeling of shame.

    “taking them away from worries and stress and into their exquisite bodies where their truest womanhood resides.”

    I did take me away from worries/stress but also away from my body/womanhood. I actually had to stop with self-injury and come to peace with my emotions in order to feel good with my body/womanhood again.

    “My cutter lover may have felt guilt about spending the best years of her life with a man who gave no hint of driving the relationship toward a marital resolution, and being unable to extricate herself because of her attachment to me.”

    I’ve always though of guilt as a social emotion you feel when you do something bad to another person, not something you feel when you’re bad to yourself. I don’t think she felt guilty. Didn’t you say she didn’t cut herself when she was with you? She was happy, probably, and she didn’t feel anxious anymore, so she was able to stop. For myself I can say that in my teenage/early twenties I always had a feeling that when I will finally feel safe (like when I’ll find a boyfriend who will love me the way I am), I will also be able to stop with my neurotic behaviour. It never happened, but I managed to stop with this anyway, more or less.

    “Or she may have just been a naturally depressive person, inherited from some long ago depressed ancestor, and cutting was her cheap Prozac.”

    Depression is usually reactive, not inherited. Maybe she had some other problems in her life.

    Btw.,this story was really romantic, I have to admit, but why end it with “The most important lesson I took away from that relationship was that cutters are a great lay. I now look for the telltale signs on all first dates. If the cuts are on her face, I know she’ll be wearing no panties underneath her skirt and will be ready to fuck in an alleyway before we’re even halfway home.”???

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    • on July 15, 2011 at 5:35 pm Emma the Emo

      I can relate feeling kind of sad sometimes about the scars and tattoos I permanently have (especially the one on my face, which was actually a result on an accident, but it was due to very stupid actions), but then I remember that it’s just the result of my inner peculiarities, something which is probably genetic and not anything I can help. I could as well have been born physically deformed, so nothing to feel guilty about. I have a lot to give otherwise and I don’t think scars make me look all that bad. Recently I got a really sweet boyfriend and he doesn’t seem to be put off by this, so I think you can find someone who’d accept you as you are.

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    • Maya: Btw.,this story was really romantic, I have to admit…

      It’s not romantic, it’s harrowing. It’s repulsive and sad if you have any idea what is going subtextually.

      … but why end it with “The most important lesson I took away from that relationship was that cutters are a great lay.”

      Because that is the highest conclusion he can recognize, it is the outer limit of a person’s worth in his estimation. You are being treated to the interior perspective of a sociopath. A person is the mere means to his private end, you did not exist before you entered his purview, and you will cease to exist except as a diminishing memory after he has extracted a measure of your life and is done with you. He believes this practice is “alpha,” and so he celebrates it. You are partially attracted to this vampirism because abuse foreclosed certain options for you before you were fully formed, like a poison released into amniotic fluid. Now you have difficulty conceiving men as simultaneously strong and unabusive, i.e., the men who do no harm are weak, and all strong men cannot but be indiscriminately harmful.

      See Sara’s comment below, “The last paragraph made me feel sick, it’s so heartless.” That is the proper response.

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      • You think Roissy is a sociopath, you pseudo-religious turd? you don’t know what a sociopath is.

        You need to pay a visit to Bill Bonin’s van down in the hell you pretend to believe in.

        “Sociopath.” “Creep.” “Douchebag.” “Abuser.”

        Fuck these mangina swear words. You need to time travel back to Billy’s van, pal.

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      • I read CH *because* his line of thinking is often sociopathic, but usually justifiably so. In order to empathize with the woman, he would have to invest emotion, and this is probably a bad idea in this case.

        Who really cares if he is objectifying this woman? She volunteered for it. She’s being shagged, not murdered. Women who don’t want to be in this girl’s position should simply not have casual sex. It’s that easy.

        It bothers me more that some people in their alpha worship, deny the truth rather than embracing it so they can get the message. That is more mangina, in my opinion, than realizing that it is kinda sick, and saying so.

        However, it is a sick world. The kinds of women who have casual sex are either whores, high T, or sick. You can’t blame a guy for noticing that and accepting it as a kind of tradeoff.

        There is no perfect woman. The hot chick who ages extremely well, has stellar character, honor, and takes excellent care of herself does not exist. If you’re going to be out there catting around, you’ll have to accept the idea of paying for it, body (and maybe facial) hair or stubble and clitoral hypertrophy, or OCD issues. Such is life.

        If you let yourself get over invested, you run a great risk of getting into a vampiric pity based relationship with someone who will teach you a hard lesson about so-called martyr types.

        Despite the hype, people who cut often do it for the endorphins, but also just as often do it for immune stimulation. It’s like natural antibiotics. Because so many women are having issues with their thyroid and are either misnourished or malnourished, cutting is the good old fashioned way of boosting a traumatized immune system. They may tell themselves many things, but taking vitamins and eating right often fixes most of it.

        I’ve reduced some of my clients’ incidence of self injury from every day to maybe once a month or two months. When the do, it’s usually triggered by stress or sugar. When they eat too much sugar for a couple of days, they get the urge again because that’s how they used to cope with the “walking through sand” feeling they thought was depression.

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      • King A,

        I went to read it again, more carefully, and I did notice some really sad paragraphs, like this one …

        “I never talked about the cutting with her again. Fact is, it didn’t much bother me. We were together for another nine months or so, and the sex was always hot.”

        Translation: The cutting didn’t bother him, because he was not interested in the girl’s soul and personality. The only important thing about her was the fact that “sex was always hot”.

        And then ending with “The most important lesson is that cutters are a great lay”. It’s almost like recommending the readers to look for the emotionally hurt girls and abuse them, because these girls are so very lonely that they will be extremely happy they finally found a soulmate and of course, sex is going to be more passionate because of that. And that’s the only thing that matters, apparently. 😦

        When I discovered this blog I thought the authors(s) are funny and also when reading this story I thought he’s merely making fun of serious things – which can be therapeutic sometimes, but when I read all the comments I see that too many readers don’t recognize it as such and are instead saying only how hot the sex is with those emotionally hurt girls or how they are not a good idea for a LTR. It’s like girls were not humans, but just an object to have sex with.

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      • The cutting didn’t bother him, because he was not interested in the girl’s soul and personality.

        It’s like girls were not humans, but just an object to have sex with.

        You are starting to get it. There IS hope for you yet.

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      • We must remember that there are higher dimensions to human development than skirt-chasing.

        I am not impressed by this quickness to dehumanize cutters.

        Yawn.

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      • Maya, you seem like a nice girl but you are so naive. Roissy’s meanderings are a clearly-written and brutally honest interior view into the mind of many, many men. Attractive men, men that women want to be with. It’s not good or bad – if these moral categories even hold weight in relationships – it just IS. You’re reading this with your female brain, doing torturous mental gymnastics trying to digest this part of the male psyche. Don’t. They’re different from us, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Try to learn from what you read, but go out on a few dates as well! Don’t worry about sleeping with men yet, just talk to them and get to know them. There’s only so much you can learn from the internet.

        And I don’t think there’s any one reason why cutters do what they do. Pain causes an endorphin rush, which produces a temporary high and makes the cutter feel good. What made them feel bad in the first place probably differs from person to person.

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      • Therein lies the danger of PUA and the truth of King A’s words. I’m essentially a Deist, not a true Christian. However, Christ was truly a revolutionary figure for goodness in the world, We owe our modern level of civilization to his teachings, even if many here refuse to see it. Because of this, he is easily the most important historical figure in the last 2000 years.

        The film Gladiator showed a fairly accurate picture of daily life in the Ancient world. Human life had no worth beyond what a man was able to make of it. How far you went in life was your measure of success and death was a half life of shadows and shame. The highest honor attainable was to be deified, by other men for your great deeds. Sing the praises of Achilles!

        Men owned one another, could use slaves for any purpose they dreamed of, and sexually abused children, for example as almost routine behavior. Women also joined in these orgies as well. The Persians liked to geld young boys to use as sex slaves. If you’ve seen the film Alexander, that effeminate character he has with him is Bagoas, who was a regular lover of Alexander’s as well as an influential advisor. He was a boy of 18 or 19 who had been castrated at about age 7 or 8, captured in a raid and enslaved. It was common to enslave all the women and children of a city once it was captured and to murder all of the men. Nero married his eunuch and had a lavish state wedding to celebrate the event, and as away of thumbing his nose at Roman old school dignity. The single most common criminal sentence in Ancient Rome was to be sentenced to die in the arena. Demand became so high, that they started finding crime just to supply vicitims for the public’s bloodlust.

        Christ taught that this was wrong, that human beings had dignity as individual souls because they were extensions of God. One of the earliest Christian reforms to society was the end of the arena. The prohibition against homosexuality was another. The conversion of slave operated estates to serfdom was another, albeit after Rome’s fall. All of our national ideas of freedom and individual rights find their source in Christ. Christianity started as a religion of slaves and outcasts, who took its message of hope in the afterlife as a source of hope for their own, often miserable lives. From there it spread to the women of the household, and from them to the men. We have taken this notion of individual dignity and secularized it today, but its roots lie in Christianity. People should know this before they insult the religion of others.

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    • Maya one thing is unquestionable, you have great insight on this thing and are very true about deep reasons for self-cutting.
      Its weird thou that you sound so familiar 🙂
      p.s. do you have BPD?

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      • I have an insight because I suffered from self-mutilation for more than 10 years, so I know what the real reasons are for doing such things.

        But let me explain one other thing again:
        Most girls who cut themselves don’t have BPD. For most it’s merely a way to cope with chronic anxiety. It’s similar to OCD.
        About BPD: I might have a mild case of BPD, actually. I don’t know, I’ve never thought about it. In my country psychiatry is not as popular as it is in U.S. Mental diseases are still a taboo, so most people never think nor talk about them.

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      • I know a lot about anxiety, ocd ,bpd etc..
        It’s all a way of addiction, be it cutting, drinking, doing drugs, changing partners, gambling, OCD… anything to deal with internal pain.
        Which country are you from?

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  16. on July 15, 2011 at 4:24 pm Practical God

    You forgot to put “Dear Penthouse” in front of your story.

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  17. on July 15, 2011 at 4:28 pm old guy, lower case

    In high school, I dated a girl who burned herself with cigarettes. Seemed a lonely thing to do. Didn’t last long, great BJ’s though.

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    • I’ve known men who burned himself did that too. In this case, it was a nice guy, not bad with the ladies and a good rugby player, who had a lot of anxiety about being a fuck up when his father was a very successful doctor. He mostly did it when he was drinking and got depressed. He had a lot of demons.

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  18. As we LAY on the bed

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  19. While a woman who cuts herself may be great in bed, she’s also got a good chance of having a borderline personality disorder and of being a risk for suicide. Dangerous to play with people like that. Handle with care.

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    • This advice is good in many contexts. It seems a testament to the limited levels of empathy that more emotionally aware sex is supposedly capable, that the suicide rates are so lob-sided (4 to 1 men to women)

      Could also be that men are better at self harm

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      • Even stranger is that women account for double the attempts. Probably men have more incentive to kill themself outright (being expendable) while for women just trying to do so might be enough to rectify the situation.

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  20. Excessive tattooing and metal parts in the body spring from the same dark corners of the Psyche.

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  21. Interesting post.

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  22. That is funny, I joke with my bitches when they start a conversation like “I need to tell you something,” and I’d say “you’re not a cutter are you, cause that’d be hot.”
    So the rumors are true…

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  23. Agree, geat lay material… but, notice how they’re not together now.

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  24. on July 15, 2011 at 5:06 pm The Alchemist

    I just finished dating a cutter. My discovery of her practice was identical to yours…right after sex. I didn’t say anything at the time, though. Brought it up later and she would never address my questions. She always had excuses for the scars and cuts I’d find: the cats, burnt it on the oven, did it changing my oil etc.. the girl was definitely depressed, didn’t smile much, had little to say and was about as emotive as a mannequin during sex. Great ass though and enjoyed being pounded doggy style…which kept me hanging around longer than I should’ve. Overall, I would not recommend dating a cutter. 1 1/2 stars

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  25. on July 15, 2011 at 5:15 pm The Alchemist

    Oh and I concur with the drama seeking attributes others here describe. She was always most engaged with me when I was an asshole to her or she thought I was fooling around on.

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  26. on July 15, 2011 at 5:25 pm enochjohnson

    She lied when she told you, you were the only one she told. She was baiting your for sympathy and in hopes for you not to dog her out. No clue why women thinks this works… especially AFTER you’ve already dropped a load.

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  27. I stopped reading after “We lied on the bed …”

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  28. I love pain, but not self inflicted pain. No, rather I love dull, palpitating pain analogous to the pain of lifting weights. I also love the sharp pain of overtaxed muscles, muscles worked to the point of injury. But I’ve only felt it twice, since then I learned proper training techniques.

    Still love the delayed onset muscle soreness given by lifting heavy weights.

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  29. I’ve always said women in the 21st century world cut/self-harm because there simply isn’t enough pain in their lives.

    Their female ancestors suffered rape, beatings, the agony of childbirth and a basic inability to control their destiny on a mass scale far exceeding that which occurs today. Now, I’m not saying all women want these things but evolution has wired them to brace for physical suffering, endure it and, quite frankly, expect it.

    Many/most modern women (while they no doubt have their problems and struggles in their individual lives) have, in actuality, pain-free existences as compared to their predecessors. Not only are they (comparative to the numbers in past eras of human history) safer and more secure but even childbirth need no longer hurt. And, in modern Western civilization, they are rarely even socially chastised (let alone physically) for poor behavior.

    In short, they have a genetic propensity to desire painful experiences coupled with the fact there is no strong hand of discipline that makes them feel centered and grounded; self-harm fills the void nicely by acting as a (on a primal level in the hindbrain) substitute maker of boundaries and enforcer of such.

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    • Interesting. Very very interesting.
      I’ll try not to act on these insights though. I don’t wanna be locked up for fulfilling a woman’s need for pain and drama.
      But this could be another reason why alpha assholes are winners.

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      • Aaron,

        Thank you. I do believe the deduction you make is a correct one. While complex, everything with a human being is connected – regardless how good one may think oneself at compartmentalizing.

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    • That’s true for men as well. Most of these disorders in our society are the disorders of idleness and wealth. People lose sight of nature and its role on our actions and the degree of control it has in our lives. I think these women especially seek a strong hand as a way of absolving them from their own sense of guilt and the internal torture it wreaks on them.

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  30. Lawrence of Arabia liked to be whipped. Guilt over his perception of his role in the Arabia Revolt and the aftermath. It was a real revelation in 1970 when the information showed up in a book about T.E. Lawrence.

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  31. on July 15, 2011 at 5:50 pm Morrisfactor

    Boy, I agree with what the Professor said above.

    Cutting is a common symptom of BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER – a very serious mental condition that affects about one out of every nine women (and to a much lesser extent, some men).

    Borderlines can appear to be very neat people at first (often do well in their careers) and are hot in bed, but this is an act – they were usually abandoned or neglected during infancy and have serious, lifelong issues of trust and overpowering feelings of loneliness and rage. They have a unique ability to “morph” into someone you think is cool, to almost draw from your goodness and mirror it back to you, so at first you really think you’ve hooked up with a great find.

    However, in truth they are soulless, selfish creatures which are will twist you and turn you every which way and leave you an emotional wreck. Avoid them at all cost – even hot sex is not worth the mind-wracking destruction of your mental well being.They can turn on a dime and become raging, spiteful monsters, often for the most petty things, like being five minutes late getting home from work.

    For god’s sake don’t get her pregnant! Most women who have several kids from several dads are BPD.

    I suggest readers look up SHRINK4MEN.COM and learn more about this condition.

    – A survivor….

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    • Concur. Borderlines are to be avoided. At most, a couple of fuck sessions and that’s it. As a LTR material, they ain’t. Fugged about fixin’ em. It’s a fools errand. The “on a dime…raging, spiteful monsters” is right on the mark.

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    • I’ve dated several, from mild up to occasionally hallucinating.

      The hot sex can be addictive, as can the other various highs.

      Borderlines are volatile hydrogen and oxygen, while regulars are just damp moisture.

      But ya, no one can handle their sanity for long being intimate with em. Not even Saint Antoine de Pussymastery.

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    • They do sound stimulating, though.

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    • Lived with a borderline and it was a really bad deal. Insidious. Read, learn and avoid this sort.

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    • Sounds like the low self-esteem (LSE) chicks which are a subject of debate in some seduction sites.
      In a nutshell, these girls fall hard for the ultimate alpha bad boy game. You can play with them, but don’t you dare start thinking about any kind of commitment with them.
      Unfortunately, many many attractive girls are LSE.

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    • “Cutting is a common symptom of BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER – a very serious mental condition that affects about one out of every nine women (and to a much lesser extent, some men).”

      Most cutters don’t have borderline personality disorder. Besides, this personality disorder is not common and it certainly does not affect one out of every nine person.

      “However, in truth they are soulless, selfish creatures which are will twist you and turn you every which way and leave you an emotional wreck. ”

      However, in truth they are anxious, hurt and lonely creatures who would need friendship, acceptance and respect. If sex is all you can give to them, then it’s no wonder you think about them the way you do.

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      • Respect has to be earned. It’s not a entitlement. Ever.

        It may be that these are anxious, hurt and lonely creatures. The problem is that they suck you into their worldview and narratives maelstrom. You trade for some vague unspecified benefits and sex your friendship, acceptance and your sanity. It’s not worth it, unless your thing is a self-sabotage as well.

        Like


      • No. Every human being (and animals as well, but we don’t talk abut this now) deserves respect.

        Treating these emotionally damaged girls like objects – just for having “hot sex” with them, is very disrespectful and this is just sad and repulsive.

        Like


      • No. Respect has to be earned. I take human beings as human beings, warts and all, but that does not mean they have a blank respect card. And how I am to respect someone that has no self-respect? (Animals are in a special category of their own–I respect my cat or my dog for their particular qualities).

        As for the sex part, I’ll quote Morrisfactor again: Borderlines can appear to be very neat people at first (often do well in their careers) and are hot in bed, but this is an act – they were usually abandoned or neglected during infancy and have serious, lifelong issues of trust and overpowering feelings of loneliness and rage. They have a unique ability to “morph” into someone you think is cool, to almost draw from your goodness and mirror it back to you, so at first you really think you’ve hooked up with a great find.

        Translated: If/when a man (and woman too) happens to get into a beginning of a relationship with the borderline and once recognized as such, be grateful for whatever sex you managed to get, and break it off, fast.

        Like


      • I’m not saying you have to adore your psychotic lover with no qualities except her mental disease. I’m saying you have to respect her soul and not just use her to have sex with her, because she is, due to her mental disease, an easy target.

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 10:10 am Emma the Emo

        Well, human beings all deserve SOME respect, at least to begin with. This is the respect I give to strangers, when I hold the door open for them, or get out of their way to let them pass. I don’t know anything about them and they haven’t done anything to earn my respect, but that’s the respect you should give in order for the society to be civil and polite. Once you get to know a person, you can either lose this respect for them, or give them more. I agree it’s possible to lose absolutely all respect for a person if they are bad enough. But even if you do, you might still feel compassion for them, which might keep you from hurting them, which might be what Maya is talking about (correct me if I’m wrong, Maya).

        Like


      • Emma, initially, I hold no respect or disrespect, just presume human being such as myself. I don’t indulge in misplaced feel-good compassion, however I have a great capacity for empathy–I lived many lives, in a manner of speaking, so that comes with it.

        I do every now and then random acts of kindness, just because. Not to be magnanimous, or such. just to see a hint of smile on someone’s face. There is not enough of it as people are wrapped up in their problems, maybe that’s why. Age/gender, no diff.

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 10:32 am Emma the Emo

        Cadnerd,
        I guess you can call it empathy, I’m not sure… I have a habit of feeling sorry for people who actively try to hurt me. I don’t have any respect for them and stay far away from them, but I see them as too weak and pathetic to hate and so I call it “compassion”, although perhaps it’s a wrong word for it. They are still human and they most often act like they do because something is hurting them (BPD people are an example), so I try to avoid getting hurt by them and I avoid hurting them as well.

        Like


      • Emma,

        I believe that guys should treat girls with respect, that means caring about their soul, emotions, not only about how hot she is in the sack (=what he can get from her)
        I’m not saying Cadnerd should adore/give special respect to his borderline lover with no other qualities except her mental disease.
        But when all he cares about is just that she’s hot in bed, that’s very disrespectful, I hope you agree with me, Emma.

        Btw. Cadnerd is saying he has “great capacity for empathy” …

        Like


      • Emma, empathy and random acts of kindness aren’t he same thing. Empathy helps decipher what goes on in mind of someone else. It is emotionally neutral.

        I don’t have any respect for them and stay far away from them, but I see them as too weak and pathetic to hate and so I call it “compassion”, although perhaps it’s a wrong word for it.

        Lemme see… no respect, weak and pathetic, not hate….

        Contempt!

        Admittedly, “compassion ” is cuter and more fashionable.

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 11:42 am Emma the Emo

        It’s a somewhat contemptuous feeling, but at the same time I almost feel their pain and wish they weren’t like they are. I’d share some strength with them if they’d let me, but they just want to continue being harmful to me, so I don’t. That’s why it feels close to compassion to me. Thanks for clarifying things about empathy, btw.

        Like


      • Rather than cutting oneself, how about deep throating, instead?

        Like


      • Human beings have dignity: intrinsic, infinite, inalienable worth. Their dignity deserves respect.

        A person’s behavior, opinion, or status does not always deserve respect, and in many cases we have a positive duty to disrespect them.

        Animals have … tasty flesh that we broil and eat.

        Like


      • I don’t eat my cat and dog, because they earned my respect not to be eaten.
        Else a member of the true PETA (People Eating Tasty Animals).

        You’re right about dignity. But that is not respect in my book. I maintain that respect is earned. Dunno, maybe we’re waxing semantics. I am from a different culture (in NA since 1984) and the contextual meaning may be somewhat shifted.

        Like


    • I have to agree with those who warn for having a relationship with a BPD sufferer. Even though, they make great lovers and will make you experience much passion, the costs of such a relationship can be very high. Especially for men who are naturally patient, introspective or overall good guys.

      I don’t want to go into this too much, but BPD is a horrible personality disorder. They are females on steroids; all the good and bad things about a women are amplified; hysterical, non-self-reflective, vengeful, manipulative, impulsive, irrational, but also feminine, spontaneous, wild, fragile and seductive. Their insecurities can turn violent and there’s no such as ‘enough’ attention. They will always feel betrayed, alone, left out, shut out, done-wrong-by-someone. Baby entrapment is a famous trick, cheating another. Every day will see moments where heaven and hell switch places.

      Some true alphas, especially the sociopathic kind, might be good combos for a BPD sufferer, because all the BPD craziness won’t get to them and they’d tell the girl to just shove it or to jump out of the window if the BPD threatens suicide or whatever.

      If you are just an AFC/regular guy and truly love the BPD or you just can’t get out of the relationship, seek help and talk to people about the problem. If she doesn’t want to deal with the disorder, you should get out of the relationship. This isn’t completely fair to the BPD, I know, because they can’t help their own disorder, but the consequence of staying in such a relationship will often mean that you’ll end up wasting your own life as well. Just think about children, you want to be raised by a mother who will treat them like she treats you?

      Like


      • “Some true alphas, especially the sociopathic kind, might be good combos for a BPD sufferer, because all the BPD craziness won’t get to them and they’d tell the girl to

        just shove it or to jump out of the window

        if the BPD threatens suicide or whatever”

        Then I am a lesser Alpha or extremely high Beta. Or a sociopath. Because I won’t hesitate to tell a female OR male to jump. Not that I want to see the splat, but because I just DGAF. (Don’t Give A Fuck)
        If someone is so mentally unstable as to want to remove themselves from the gene pool, who am I to stop them?

        Like


      • Yup, minipulation sucks. Go ahead, mo’fo, jump… I’ll be sad then find someone else. Just like when they cry over stuff in front of you… kick back, have a beer, ask “Are you done?”

        Like


      • BPD is terrifying. I knew someone with it and she seemed like a sweet girl at first – generous, fun and successful. I’m a female, so no sex was involved, but I thought of her as a close friend. Then everything just slowly went dark. She started to verbally attack me, became paranoid and accused me of sleeping with her husband. I tried to avoid her but we were co-workers, and she started spreading vicious rumours about me at work and sending me incoherent ranting emails.

        The whole thing ended when I visited her one last time to confront her about interfering with my job. I wasn’t prepared for how crazy this chick truly was. She was in a full-on meltdown at that point and actually got a knife from the kitchen and threatened to kill both me and herself. I said, “If you come at me with that knife you will surely die, but it won’t be on your terms. If you kill yourself, I will take zero responsibility and feel no guilt. I won’t even visit your funeral. Your choice.” Then I left.

        She didn’t bother me again, and she didn’t kill herself. Last I heard she’s still up to her old tricks, luring people in and then turning on them. She cheated on her husband incessantly and he’s out of the picture now, but she’s still seducing married coworkers. And she won’t get fired because she slept with one of the bosses and is now blackmailing him. BPDs are filled with soul-withering levels of self-loathing, and also lack inhibitions that prevent them from turning that hate outward against others. Scary shit. Men should handle with extreme caution.

        Like


      • They can be very sweet initially, to slip in their manipulative shit. One of these was so vindictive after my second wife was unwilling to “cooperate” in her scheming that she send a CPS on us. Of course the CPS worker came out of the visit with nothing, but it is not a pleasant thing.

        Like


      • I think as much as their attacks seem personal, they aren’t. They punish the people who care about them the most, because they see themselves as fundamentally unlovable – so anyone who does love them is suspect. It also becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy; by pushing people away they end up alone (as they believe they deserve) and they also get to feel sorry for themselves (“Everyone just abandons me anyway!”) It is truly a twisted pathology and as much as you want to react with anger when they attack you, I think the correct response is pity. That and getting away from them as quickly as possible.

        Like


      • You’re right about that. I know a person (my family member, actually) who probably has mild BPD – she behaves just like you’ve described. I never thought of it as BPD, because as I mentioned somewhere else, mental diseases are still quite a taboo in my country and there is not much genuine interest in it.

        Like


      • At the core is a self-destruction, that’s a given. But the degree of sociopathic behavioral patterns varies, thus also the manifestations vary. In some cases, the responsibility is entirely projected outward, even on a subconscious level. In the more extreme cases, the love is entirely narcissist and if not reflected back, it’s like a tornado going through Joplin.

        Like


      • There is still considerable controversy in the psychiatric community as to whether BPD exists as a discrete illness, even in countries with high mental health awareness. It’s more of a spectrum disorder, with some sufferers exhibiting more depressive symptoms, others histrionic/narcissistic etc. This makes it very difficult to diagnose and treat effectively. I feel really sorry for family members of untreated BPD sufferers. I think dating on even casually is risky, regardless of the sex.

        Like


      • Been there done that,
        had to do a 6 months therapy after having affair with BPD.

        Never listened to friends and family advice which can be summarized into “Don’t walk, Run! ”

        Well, at least i am a lot smarter now, learned something knew.

        But it really is true, these poor souls suffering from BPD can shred your life to pieces and still have no clue about it , even think its your fault.

        Run! Don’t walk 🙂

        Like


      • Definitely. Hot, sexually-aggressive older women raised by clinical psychopaths may be fun and teach you how to satisfy women like a pornstar, but they can be hazardous to your mental health… don’t listen to their sh*t unless it has to do with the two of you having bed-breaking sex. Period.

        Like


    • Thanks. Good advice.

      Like


    • “Has America become a nation of psychotics? You would certainly think so, based on the explosion in the use of antipsychotic medications. In 2008, with over $14 billion in sales, antipsychotics became the single top-selling therapeutic class of prescription drugs in the United States, surpassing drugs used to treat high cholesterol and acid reflux.”

      http://tinyurl.com/64ky7pa

      Like


      • King A,

        I’m not sure why did you post this link, but I presume you wanted to tell us that people here are overdiagnosing each other (or people they know) with psychiatric illnesses?
        Btw. After reading this article I’m surprised how fashionable psychiatric medications are in the U.S.!

        Like


      • The Medical BUSINESS (trade name: “the health care system”) is a giant parasite, constantly seeking more growth; health – mental or physical – is an impediment to that growth.

        Like


  32. I can’t imagine ever cutting myself, but if I am stressed out or feeling down I will push myself extra hard at the gym or push myself doing sprints. The pain combined with the endorphins of working out really make me feel alive.

    Like


    • Yes. The combination seems to make everything more clear as well. The clarity brings a focus that makes whatever easier to deal with.

      Like


    • Try boxing/MMA. Coming home from a brutal sparring sesh where you come out on top is only beneath sex, drugs, sex on drugs, sky diving, and bungee jumping when it comes to feeling alive in my experience.

      Like


    • Casual,

      I am trying to force myself to do this and create a habit of when i’m feeling down to recognize that exercise is one of the best things I can do. It can be hard when you have too force yourself to do this if you are not used to exercising, but I do find I feel so much better and more energized when I do. And then to see the results of looking better even pushes one more. Its a nice double whammy 🙂

      Like


      • neeecy,

        Keep at it and try to do it at very regular intervals. Many people will actually become addicted to the endorphins and crave a workout. It can take a while to get to this place, but it is a pretty wonderful feeling to crave to gym (not as great as the feeling of the endorphins, though). Do you lift weights?

        Like


      • Yes after a workout I feel good. I haven’t been lifting weights (which I need to). I have just been taking those cute little exercise aerobic classes. But my friend is trying to get me to join a crossfit exercise porgram with her, b/c they cover all kinds of workouts (weights, boxing etc). I think this is why my results may have been so slow. I’m also thinking about getting a trainer to speed up the process.

        Like


      • Eh, you don’t need a trainer (unless that is what will work best for you of course). Take a look at this book:

        http://www.amazon.com/Sculpting-Her-Body-Perfect-3rd/dp/0736073884/ref=dp_ob_title_bk

        It is awesome. You will take the fat off so much faster doing it this way. Don’t be so concerned about the scale as you will gain muscle and it will show up and throw your results off. Measure yourself with a tape measure before you start and track yourself that way. He also has a book called “The Ladies Home Workout Bible” If you prefer to work at home. He really is a wonderful trainer.

        Like


      • Stingray

        Thank you so much! I really think having some kind of at home work out is also key. I will check out that book on Amazon and purchase I’ll also tell my g/f about it as well since she and I are doing this together.

        Zunder
        i honestly don’t want a trainer that is why I have been holding off – and yes they are EXXXPENSIVE where I live.

        Like


      • You dont need a fucking trainer that charges anywhere from $100-$200 a session. Most of them don’t know shit. there are pelnty of resoucres online to help you exercise properly if you are a noob to the fitness game.
        Good to see a former(?) fattie realsing that the way to a mans heart is on the exercise floor not the foodcourt floor.

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 8:36 pm Original JB

        The trick is finding something fun that you’ll want to keep doing.

        Like


      • Eh, you don’t need a trainer (unless that is what will work best for you, of course). Take a look at the book “Sculpting Her Body Perfect” by Brad Schoenfeld. It is awesome. You will take the fat off so much faster if you lift weights. Don’t be so concerned about the scale as you will gain muscle and it will show up and throw your results off. Measure yourself with a tape measure before you start and track yourself that way. He also has a book called “The Ladies Home Workout Bible” if you prefer to work at home. He really is a wonderful trainer.

        BTW, if this ends up being a double post, I apologize. I posted it a few hours ago and it stated that it was awaiting moderation. That has never happened before so I am sending this again. I linked an Amazon page in the original. Does that make it go to moderation for some reason?

        Like


      • Eh, you don’t need a trainer (unless that is what will work best for you, of course). Take a look at the book “Sculpting Her Body Perfect” by Brad Schoenfeld. It is awesome. You will take the fat off so much faster if you lift weights. Don’t be so concerned about the scale as you will gain muscle and it will show up and throw your results off. Measure yourself with a tape measure before you start and track yourself that way. He also has a book called “The Ladies Home Workout Bible” if you prefer to work at home. He really is a wonderful trainer.

        BTW, if this ends up being a double post, I apologize. I posted it a few hours ago and it stated that it was awaiting moderation. That has never happened before so I am sending this again. I linked an Amazon page in the original. Does that make it go to moderation for some reason?

        Like


      • I just bought a house with a pool. It is one of the best things I’ve ever done. Swimming is great exercise, you tone up quickly in all the right places, and best of all, you don’t sweat.

        Like


  33. It doesn’t seem like many posters here respond to cutting with visceral disgust, which is my reaction. Chateau members have no problem slamming fat people, and neither do I – it’s a condition of poor health, character and genes. Cutting is no different. Do better.

    Like


  34. on July 15, 2011 at 6:28 pm Harmonious Fist

    “Cutting is no different.”

    But it is. A fat girl prevents you from being aroused. A cutter has no impact on that. That is all the difference in the world.

    Like


    • “A fat girl prevents you from being aroused. A cutter has no impact on that”

      I call bullshit on that. Same with fat chicks. It’s visually disgusting.

      Like


      • on July 17, 2011 at 7:19 pm Harmonious Fist

        The very small cuts, barely noticeable, described in this post, were not visually disgusting.

        Like


  35. Longways, not across.

    “he most important lesson I took away from that relationship was that cutters are a great lay. ”

    Really, you don’t want thay drams.

    Like


  36. @ Harmonious – “Visceral disgust” ≠ arousal.

    Like


  37. Longways, not across.

    “he most important lesson I took away from that relationship was that cutters are a great lay. ”

    Really, you don’t want that drama.

    Like


  38. The last paragraph made me feel sick, it’s so heartless.

    Like


    • This blog strays into Patrick Bateman territory on occasion — fine. But when it does, it gives game a bad name. Women want to be gamed. They want male leadership, they are all seeking alpha. It is programmed into their very sense of identity sure as the second X chromosome.

      Why does this necessitate their abuse? The fucking and chucking? The wadding up and disposal of used women like trash? This is not love and it is hardly even sex per se. It is advanced mutual masturbation, it is genital friction between two dead souls.

      I had a young woman ask me to choke her during sex. Who thoughtlessly complies to such an incongruous request without peering a little bit into the dysfunction? Who does it without curiosity and concern? Whose curiosity is satisfied by the unlikely and the superficial (“a naturally depressive person, inherited from some long ago depressed ancestor”)? Don’t you feel your own death as you are slowly killing these women?

      It doesn’t have to be this way. Try giving instead of taking. You get back seven times seventyfold. Game is an advanced form of giving, a man giving manliness to a woman in all her femininity who requires her opposite for natural completion. This blog counsels an imitation of that giving so that the thief might pilfer like a whore/burglar who bangs johns and steals wallets while the victim sleeps.

      Women are not a means to an end. They are ends in themselves. It is not cryptofeminism to recognize their dignity. They are not little fictional players in some movie script. To pretend they are is not alpha, it’s alpha miming bordering on the delusional. A leader looks out for his charges, cares about his followers, inspires them to excellence, and dies in their stead.

      Occasionally the rock is lifted on this blog, and we see what worms flail in the muck.

      Like


      • Worms don’t flail. Bad writers flail when they use exaggerated and melodramatic language. That’s you, pal.

        You claim to be religious and don’t even feel the thrill of evil — you’re a fool and a liar.

        You have no “charges,” no “followers,” and you’ll “die” for no one. Stop trying to persuade yourself that you are a believer. You’re not.

        You’re a coward, desperate to convince us that you’re not a standard-issue nihilist. But you are nihilist through and through.

        Like


      • You need to ease up a bit. The internet is not worth the blood pressure, brother. What is it that urges you to follow me around like a puppy and yip?

        I appreciate the criticism about “flail.” There are better words. Cheers.

        Like


      • It’s distasteful, but sadly all you said is true.

        “It is advanced mutual masturbation, it is genital friction between two dead souls.”

        Yes 😥

        “They are not little fictional players in some movie script. To pretend they are is not alpha, it’s alpha miming bordering on the delusional.”

        Maybe that’s why we have so many feminists … When women find out how cruel, shallow and developmentally retarded many men are … Why care for and respect such creatures?

        Like


      • That’s a two way street.

        “When men find out how cruel, shallow and developmentally retarded many women are … Why care for and respect such creatures?”

        Specifically in regards to women who pass over the “good guys to ride the alpha cock carousel”, only to bitch about the fact that “there are no good guys out there”.

        Like


      • Funny how the argument works perfectly in reverse.

        Like


      • on July 17, 2011 at 1:29 pm Reactionary_Konkvistador

        +1

        Like


      • “I had a young woman ask me to choke her during sex. Who thoughtlessly complies to such an incongruous request without peering a little bit into the dysfunction?”

        Safe rape fantasy. At that point, it’s not you who she is fucking.

        ‘Who does it without curiosity and concern?”

        Anyone who has encountered it before.

        Like


      • King,

        Very good. Especially the “giving” part.

        But where do I go to learn true game?

        Like


      • Ron wrote: But where do I go to learn true game?

        To the leaders of men. If you are young enough, enlist in the US Marine Corps. No website, no $5000 seminar, no library of Seduction Manuals will bring you “true game.”

        This blog, and the entire PUA industry, is about fakery. Here is a colloquy of grifters talking about the latest technology in con artistry. It’s not a coincidence that the most famous PUA got his start in magic tricks and is no less a spectacle than Gob Bluth The Illuuuusionist. (Cue Final Countdown.)

        Life is about reality. Don’t “fake it till you make it.” Make it. Work on securing something to brag about rather than polishing your mimicry of braggarts. Compile a record to back up the indirect, low-key braggadocio that comes to alphas by nature. Don’t be that little toy doggie behind the door with a deceptive bark to scare off intruders. Be the big dog, on the porch, with a low growl.

        The advantage of imitative apprenticeship is coming to witness the true dynamic of social interaction first-hand. In that regard, this blog is an absolute national treasure. The stuff works, and you will see it work. But as a program for life? The trickery and the lies get old, and maintaining it becomes exhausting; or it becomes such a part of your nature that you lose all ability to recognize true virtue, like old women who lie with their eyes about how decrepit they are in the mirror. “I’ve still got it!”

        Where do you go to get true game? This blog, for a start. But only a start. Be a man and loot it for what works, don’t be taken by its call to slavishness, and drop it when it claims Eros is the one true god. He’s not. The mastery of any craft begins with self-mastery, with discipline. Eros invites chaos and the madness of envy. True game commences when you have a working familiarity with the basics, independence from your mentors, and an ability to employ your skills not toward creating momentary deceptions but toward forcing dishonest surroundings into compliance with the truth.

        Like


      • KIng A, you’re right. However, today, people are spoiled and women have come to believe hypergamy and an endless “in love” feeling are their due… real Alpha-anything is loser behavior that reduces one’s apparent DHV.

        I’m not a Marine, but a fellow ground combatant though. Hollering that you’ll “kill” someone is more manly than actually meaning it. Not saying anything you don’t mean leaves you being perceived as “introverted” and “quiet” because no one does/means anything they say and the least outlandish isn’t exciting enough. (Be like Mystery, wear a big hat and googles to show how brashly independent and confident about that you are to the chicks at the bar… like everyone else who’s read his book, but that’s what competes as manly and rugged to women who “get out of line” and “make some noise” on their “crazy nights” down at the bar after all the “beta” men from the ‘burbs they ignore at their dull office job anyway.)

        Responsibility is for losers, even doing what you’ll say you will (eww, predictable). Nothing says “leader” like being a selfish, impulsive loudmouth who has to be chased and hounded to do anything like a punk-ass 12-year-old… make ’em grateful when you actually come through for once, keeping coming back for more! Of course, this is the dynamic of the corporate “cubicle farm” or military garrison rear where courting favor (you know, kssing butt) and “preception is reality” (posturing, shinola, etc.) is where it’s at because no one actually does anything… that’s for chumps who don’t rate with no “pontential,” you know. Be sure to steal their results when they can’t be blamed for your screw-ups, remember!

        Unfortunately, people have forgotten about responsibility and the consequences of not being so. The “Alpha” they pine for is a dude on welfare and possibly a criminal or crackhead. The “Beta” they despise as not “fun” is John Wayne. Now we’ve got the “cock carousel” and “divorce rape” because they next “Alpha” dick WILL be the fulfilling one who’ll commit, trust us. Real Alphas do the best with what they’ve got and don’t give a sh*t about how they look doing it, which is they’re downfall.

        Like


      • But more important:

        Not everyone is the alpha of the pack, and there is no shame in deference to leadership — one submits to the pack, not to a man. The modern beta is not an alpha-submissive, he is an alienated runt who has come to believe in the impossibility of the pack dynamic. There are few packs anymore. They are hardly legal in a feminized culture! So Beta believes modernity has made wolfishness obsolete. Women believe the same “pretty” lie — until they find themselves, like Little Red Riding Hood, in the company of wolves. And then their instinct takes over.

        You can imitate alpha, but you can’t imitate a whole pack. In other words, there is limited utility to being All Hat and No Cattle. You can pretend you’re the leader until somebody says, “Hey, where’s your pack?” The author of this blog suggests when your bluff is called you simply skedaddle to the next throng of sluts, who these days are thick on the ground. This is only possible by keeping your horizon narrow to achieve the crudest kind of greatness.

        There is no point to alpha behavior outside the pack — except to deceive people, especially women, into acting on instinct. True game is doing without the deception, and creating an environment in which the instincts of everyone around you align with your conscious purpose. Everyone benefits from, everyone craves strong leadership. It orders the chaos. To take this great responsibility and direct it toward satisfying low impulses is not just a waste, it is positively profane and loserish. It’s Gollum finding the ring of power and using it to sneak up on fish in a cave, rather than a king-warrior lashing it to his scepter and heading up a great army.

        Society has become a blob of proud “individuals” and “special snowflakes” who wander uncommunicatively past each other like atoms adrift from elemental cohesion. Packs are molecular chemistry. True game means uniting the desperate disparate, male and female, under the power of your command. Is that you? Maybe. Could it be you? It’s harder than these websites make it out to be. But if you are a true candidate, then get to work. The country — and therefore the world — is meandering toward the abyss (see previous post “The Folly Before The Fall”) and we need all men to step up their game.

        Like


      • As seen on TV… Criminal Minds espisode where a serial killer is using PUA technique to snare victims, so our intrepid team of crime fighters checks out a Game class:

        Like


      • “In other words, there is limited utility to being All Hat and No Cattle.”

        True, but most western women don’t demand or deserve any more than the hat. So the hat is what they get.

        It’s very easy to opt out of the riff raff. I didn’t realize it before my bitch epiphany, but I’ve been doing this all my life, which is why even my relatively bad dating experiences were still with relatively decent guys who I just mishandled.

        It is easy to start a conversation about leadership, honor, the people they admire, and the books they love with a man. In a quarter to half an hour, you know who’s standing in front of you. A woman shags slackers with nothing going for them because she wants to. Her standards are low. Same reason men shag sub-courtesan level hoes and low character women.

        Both are getting what they want out of the transaction, so I wouldn’t knock it. It’s what they want. Let them have their fun. My descendants will need who to rule.

        Like


  39. My GF scratches her ass to the point of blood during her periods. Or at least she used to.

    She also likes a hard smack on the ass with a ping pong paddle.

    Connection?

    Like


    • This aspect of Roissy’s Laws, regarding multiple females, may need codification:

      Females have no problem sharing an alpha sexually, even simultaneously. In fact, it can be the equivalent of little girls playing together—the cock being their dollhouse. What they have a problem with is sharing him socially, sharing his status. Conversely, men have no problem sharing a woman socially, sharing her status, because, for a man, who really cares about her fucking status. What is there to share? However, men do have a problem sharing her sexually, because she only has so many eggs, and he only has so many resources to invest in offspring.

      Therefore, build your harem, accept the social pressure from feminized culture, and know that beneath that, at the cellular level, your chosen lifestyle is actually sanctioned by all but your competitors.

      Like


  40. When I was married, I had something happen that scared the shit out of me. Well, I had a lot of things, but I’ll share one.

    I came home from work, pretty exhausted. But, as I ascended the stairs to the bedroom, I heard the tell tale sound of water rustling in the bathtub.

    My first thought was, “Sexy time” as I knew it was my wife taking a bath. And we had some awesome sexcapades that started with a bath.

    So, I opened the bathroom door.

    My ready-for-sex smile turned to shock. She was sitting in the tub filled with a crimson liquid. Water mixed with blood, and she had a razor in her hand.

    “What the hell are you doing?” I exclaimed as I saw the cuts on her legs and arms. Not cat scratches like Roissy found. Deep gashes that looked like an extra from Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

    She replied, “I’m cutting the bad parts out.”

    Long story short, we are not married now.

    Like


  41. Pain takes us men out of our minds, away from debilitating introspection and toward living in the moment.

    Describes it perfectly. When at one’s most depressed, nothing helps alleviate that level of pain as well as inflicting physical pain. Crazy amounts of exercise helps too – one for the endorphins, two for the pain. It’s the only distraction that works.

    Like


  42. http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhFFVx1ib7bCPPj3s9

    Damn: Dude Falls Off Building While Proposing To His Girl [Fixed]

    Like


  43. There is a wonderful book published one or two years ago titled “Spent”. It should be required reading for all regulars to this blog.

    The book takes an evo-psych view of modern consumerism and the insights go way, way beyond the usual fare in this area.

    The premise is that the are 6 major personality traits of interest in attracting mates and that most consumer purchases are motivated to signal which trait or traits an individual posesses. Fascinating stuff for students of game.

    The author mentions, in a by-the-by way, that common behaviors such as cutting, tatooing and piercing are unconcious attempts to signal fitness (and desireablity) for mating. It works like this – injuring the body induces infection and inflammation and a good immune response is indicated by proper healing of the wound. Good immune response is a sign of health and biological fitness and hence a good indicator of fitness for mating.

    Most things that go on with us are way below the conscious level and for people with very low self esteem, this may be a way of advertising that they are OK for mating after all. The cutting and healing is all non-verbal.

    The book gives this example in the larger context of infection ( and fear of infection) being a key driver in a lot of human behavior and sociology. And it gets even more fascinating when he gets into fear of infection from memes and ideas.

    I believe this is the deepest idea that gets of the issue of self-mutilation. And it may address why injuries inflicted during rites of passage in all societes. A test of fitness.

    The one things that really matter are survival, mating and reproduction. Love really does make the world go ’round.

    Like


    • I don’t think I needed an evo-psych expert to relate the fact that tattooing and piercing are attempts to signal fitness for mating. Where I and this so-called expert differ is that I see nothing UNconscious about those attempts, and I can’t imagine it has anything to do with showing off immune response. And how does someone know whether they are gonna have a good immune response before they even get the tat or get pierced or cut?

      Anyways..

      Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 8:44 pm Original JB

        “And how does someone know whether they are gonna have a good immune response before they even get the tat or get pierced or cut?”

        It’s a gamble, a bet. Same as high-risk behavior by males – if they survive their fitness is potentially raised (through status, reputation, etc.)

        Like


      • In societies that tatoo a lot like the Maori or the Ancient Britons, tatoos were a system of acknowedgement for achievements in battle or athletic competitions- the same role as medals or trophies today. This would lend support to the idea of it being a demonstration of health.

        Like


  44. I don’t get the point of cutting. You could get the same effect by doing say, ab crunches or push ups or squats till you throw up, and you’d get fit(ter). With no scars, just a killer behind or something. It seems stupid and to my thinking no sex could be that great to make up for the 99% of the time doing other things with the woman.

    But that’s just me. I’d happily trade off a few points of hotness in a girl for intelligence, amiability, and amusement.

    Like


  45. Advice to “cutters”: cut deeper. And as you die, don’t imagine that your “boredom” and “pain” were the result of any insight. You’re stupid and weak ingrates, that’s all.

    Ingrates. That’s what this is, ingratitude for the brief gift of life.

    It’s despicable.

    Like


  46. Roissy’s commenters should all be sterilized.

    Like


  47. Really? It’s not that complicated. Cutters have been abused. Hasn’t anyone here ever listened to Loveline for more than two minutes?

    Using damaged women is like raping the retarded. They are all kinds of fucked up in the head. They have male sex drives stuck in the red because they were kick-started early. They give the “hottest sex” because their wires are so crossed that they conflate love and death and pain.

    You like fucking an open wound? You like squeezing what little dignity remains out of a girl for your passing pleasure? You are looting the ruins of what should have been a magnificent temple, like homeless guys tearing the copper out of abandoned marble buildings and selling it as scrap for pennies.

    There was no punishment for the pimping-out of their innocence, and so they punish themselves. It is a secret horror that stalks them for life. There was never a reconciliation, no absolution. The victim intuits a reckoning must be made, but their abuser looms too large to imagine it possible he pay for his crimes, so they turned inward and pay on his behalf, causing a self-loathing that often ends in suicide.

    Not that you know or care what lies under the skin of your conquests. We all have preyed on these kind of girls, it’s hard not to, they beg to be preyed on. But to write about it in perfect ignorance, almost bragging?

    This blog post is a paean to the long-term benefits of molestation. Flesh crawling.

    Like


    • I agree with your general sentiment and even the old PUA adage to “leave her better than you found her” but you’re slightly overstating the case, IMO.

      The feelings of the woman in the OP do not arise out of trauma. Her reaction is neither clinically determined nor particularly deep. It is, IMHO, simply fashion.

      Some might disagree given the fact that her wounds are discreet; but as we know women adopt fashions as much for the projection value of how they make them feel as for the utility value of the reactions they engender.

      In the case of cutting, distressed urban Grrrls have simply found their ideal new “Look At Me” therapy-discipline: it’s edgy (literally!), draws sympathetic attention, and graphically symbolizes the projection of their own martyr-like self-image. Guaranteed cheaper with less commitment required than pilates, spinning or bulimia.

      You can bet that 20 years ago these same head-cases would have been burning themselves with cigarettes or offering condomless anal sex in airport bathrooms. It’s not so much a cry for help as it is a cry of “I’m bored and incapable of defining my own purpose!”

      She just needs to feel something… anything. A job won’t do the trick. It should be something piercing like a dick, or unsettling like a good session of ass-smack discipline.

      What’s the story here?

      I see this post as related to the previous one about the decline of the West. People with real depression and suffering do not leave admirable scars. Ask me how I know…

      Like


      • “In the case of cutting, distressed urban Grrrls have simply found their ideal new “Look At Me” therapy-discipline”

        Wrong. People who harm themselves want to hide the wounds, not expose them.

        Like


      • Until it becomes a fashion. Then they proudly display their mutilations as a part of “belonging”.

        Like


      • No. Most people who have problems with addictions or OCD try to hide their behaviour and are ashamed of it. But of course, like an alcoholic is happy to find a “friend” who’s doing the same strange compulsive thing, these girls are happy to find out that their schoolmates are doing the same.

        Like


      • Maya, sweetie…

        Men wear their scars proudly with a mixture of bemusement and regret depending on how they were earned.

        Women hide their scars precisely so they’ll be found.

        For a man it’s a souvenir, a closed case, an old story.

        For a woman it’s always fresh, ready to be re-opened, an ever-present symbol of her suffering. She can look at it and remember EXACTLY HOW SHE FELT when she received that wound.

        I have great sympathy for those who suffer from depression, anxiety and LSE. I also have sympathy for modern Western girls who are overwhelmed or unfulfilled and who have not been taught by society how to properly process or counteract these feelings… that is why I try to seduce, dominate and liberate them.

        You clearly need a loving spanking…

        Like


      • “For a woman it’s always fresh, ready to be re-opened, an ever-present symbol of her suffering. She can look at it and remember EXACTLY HOW SHE FELT when she received that wound.”

        Received? I thought we’re talking about self-harming here.
        As far as I know cutting is more like other anxiety disorders or an OCD, rather than a ‘symbol of suffering’ to be shown to other people. It can be as mild as nail biting. Sometimes with a component of deliberate self-destruction and maybe punishment. I know it was in my case, but I know quite a few girls with very mild forms of self harming and they always say it’s more like an OCD and I believe them.

        Like


      • My point is that whether self-inflicted or not, whether pathological or merely whimsical, such acts of self-harming have both an immediate and lasting reward for women through their power to evoke powerful emotions which are symbolic of her self-image.

        That’s why I’m calling the current rage for cutting, merely fashion.

        If it were merely OCD or out of self-loathing, why do women never disfigure their beautiful hair? Answer: because it would only make them look ugly, not cool, and it would eventually grow back, depriving them of the symbolic “scarring.”

        Maybe if you said a little more about the kind of things you’ve done, it’d help you resolve some of your anxiety/stress…

        Like


      • “self-harming has both an immediate and lasting reward”

        You’re wrong. Self harming has an immediate reward (relieving stress) but it is harmful in long term (lowered SMV!!!).
        It’s like alcoholism – it relieves stress immediately, but in long term it completely destroys your body and brain.

        Like


      • “that is why I try to seduce, dominate and liberate them.”

        And after that, throw them away and forget about them completely.

        It doesn’t liberate them, you know? Maybe they like to have sex with you, but after you discard them I’m so 100% sure they feel much worse. Their problems didn’t disappear, they actually have, on the top of their suffering, one new problem to deal with – a broken heart.

        Like


      • Darling, now you wound me with your accusations of caddishness and by selectively deconstructing my argument instead of taking my point. You’re unfairly projecting your fear of other people who have hurt you onto me.

        Please try to imagine me looking deep into your eyes as I say this:

        I try to love each woman I’m with.

        Sometimes I fail due to my own limitations or due to circumstances. Sometimes the woman is the obstacle and something in her will not open up to me. I do not lie to women or allow them to impose their delusions.

        You speak as if non-exclusive or impermanent love is not love at all. But parents love each of their children in their own fashion, and the memory of what it once felt like to be truly loved or truly content will still serve as an emotional lighthouse even during life’s most troubling storms…

        I can see that you’ve been hurt, my sweet, but you must first open up and offer love in order to receive it.

        Like


      • Daigoro,

        “You speak as if non-exclusive or impermanent love is not love at all.”

        I’m kinda okay with non-exclusive love. But what “impermanent” means? To love a girl until her 30th birthday? To love her for one night? What?

        Like


      • Ask yourself if you have any concern for the broken hearts of men.

        Like


      • bleh,

        I have a concern for broken hearts of men, as well. I have a family member who broke a few hearts and they were all left depressed and with lower self-esteem than before. They also couldn’t find another girlfriend. I think it’s very mean from a girl to break a guy’s hear as well. I can’t stand such girls. But I know that she did it only because in her heart she’s just as confused as I am. Or even more.

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 9:22 am Emma the Emo

        I don’t hide my scars anymore. Better endure some negative reactions than hide them all the time. Too much to bother with. I know another one who cut herself. I think she hid it for a while (you know it’s kind of embarassing to have them, people are more likely to show disgust than sympathy), but now arrived to the same conclusion.

        Like


      • Well, I still try to cover them (those on my face) and I’ll go to the dermatologist to fill them. I’m very concerned about my SMV.
        I have one other self-inflicted injury on my body and I try to accept it but I’m afraid that when I’ll have a boyfriend I’ll be ashamed of it because I think he’ll probably think how pathetic I was to do this unnecessary harm to my body.

        Like


      • Daigoro: Women hide their scars precisely so they’ll be found. … For a woman it’s always fresh, ready to be re-opened, an ever-present symbol of her suffering. She can look at it and remember EXACTLY HOW SHE FELT when she received that wound.

        This is smart. Not the whole story, but there is something to what you’re saying. Women do want to share their pain, but it isn’t strictly an attention move. It is a compromise, an outward mark of their shameful experience without revealing the precise nature of that experience, which would bring more shame.

        They are caught in a tension they cannot resolve: the need to receive punishment, the need to broadcast their “guilt” to the world, and the need to keep it all secret. The self-scarring screams guilt and bleeding for her sins while still retaining plausible deniability. (“She steadied her gaze and paused, an odd hesitation that told me she was quickly weighing the options of lying or telling the truth. ‘I… they’re cut marks.'”)

        The scars are a coded advertisement for select audiences that whisper, “Ask me about the unspeakably bad things I have done.”

        Like


      • I have great sympathy for those who suffer from depression, anxiety and LSE. I also have sympathy for modern Western girls who are overwhelmed or unfulfilled and who have not been taught by society how to properly process or counteract these feelings… that is why I try to seduce, dominate and liberate them. You clearly need a loving spanking…

        This also is perceptive, but the “liberation” is a false one. To punish them for false crimes is driving home their false guilt, a punishment without true merit or absolution. They need to be shown — not talked at, not “convinced” in speech — that they are innocent, not complicit in the evil perpetrated on them. This requires mercy in the healer, not an enabling of the demons. Yes, seduce and dominate, but then stay your hand. Demonstrate that strength does not require her debasement. Then she can complete the treatment by showing mercy herself and forgiving her penitent abuser.

        The problem is, it’s tempting to be the whip hand, and hot to be the punished one. It’s a quick high that feels like medicine but only buries the disease even deeper, and in the end there is no rebirth, only a resignation to their condition. There is a cure, but too many who might otherwise be healers succumb to the quick thrill of playing daddy. The cycle has to be interrupted, and that takes more strength, more understanding, and more control than most men have.

        Like


      • King, being a healer and being in a man/woman sexual relationship are two entirely different dynamics. They don’t mesh well together. Like oil and water–you can shake it up and create a temporary emulsion but after a while they separate. As I stated elsewhere, it’s a fools errand trying to fix ‘er up. Been there, done that. The result–the beast was shifted in another area and lied in wait to strike from unexpected direction at an opportune moment, long time later.

        Like


      • This requires mercy in the healer, not an enabling of the demons. Yes, seduce and dominate, but then stay your hand. Demonstrate that strength does not require her debasement. Then she can complete the treatment by showing mercy herself and forgiving her penitent abuser.

        I like this. This very much accords with my thinking though my experience has been mixed and not wide when it comes to deeply damaged women.

        The brash independent girl who introduced me to spanking when I was 25, for example (a story btw that my buddies still consider as their own sexual awakening), I rationalized as merely being under a lot of stress from her high-pressure job and enjoying the focus, discipline and sexual release of some heavy spanking. But as our trust grew she became more needy and revealed much deeper psychological scars. I recoiled at the time because I was not adequately equipped to help this woman, though I sincerely wanted to.

        If it were now, I know I could have a firmer hand and be a wiser, more affectionate lover… but I might still stay clear as the lure of hot thrashing sex in exchange for opening a pandora’s box of unresolved emotional issues is not nearly as tempting as it once was.

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 9:14 am Emma the Emo

        People with real depression do sometimes leave scars. Not all of them, but some. Ask me how I know.

        Like


      • No need to ask. Presuming a capability to learn from one’s experience, whether first or second hand.

        Like


      • Ah, but I said that such souls do not leave “admirable scars” and I was discerning between the dreadful impulse to end one’s own torment in a single rash act of courage versus the cosmetic ordeal of self-scarring as a coping mechanism.

        The wounds of a failed suicide–like the purple gashes that ran along my cousin’s wrist or the knotted mass of tissue that a carving knife left in his gut–are surely not the kind of scars that they romanticize in a Sofia Coppola movie or that one is “happy” to recognize in others, as Maya suggested.

        I try to be sympathetic to both sides but it’s a little like comparing real rape to the elevator proposal.

        And, as long as you hide the reasons for your cutting, you are in effect still covering your scars. Care to come clean, love?

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 10:53 am Emma the Emo

        Ok, I see what you mean, but if you’re suggesting people with real depression don’t cut themselves and leave small scars, that really depressed people only leave suicide-attempt scars, you are wrong. Many people suffer for years instead of trying to kill themselves. Especially women, who are too “cowardly” to actually kill themselves, unlike men who do it much easier. Doesn’t mean their brain chemicals aren’t out of balance, and it doesn’t mean they don’t suffer from real depression. I’ve made a similar mistake, thinking my friend who was depressed was just begging for attention. A loyal friend doesn’t just turn into an attention whore. And that she didn’t.
        I cut myself, but not because of real depression. Comparing me to suicidal people is indeed like comparing real rape to the elevator incident, and I don’t. If you want to know my reasons for cutting, just read my comment, no. 4.

        Like


    • Ah, but King, the important thing is that she wasn’t fat.

      Look, I get what you’re saying, but almost everybody nowadays is a bit damaged. I think it’s a good thing if someone in the western world is honest about the casual nature of it.

      To ask a woman to be internally okay with selling her femininity for empowertment on purpose is asking her to injure herself. So there’s the psychological initiation. The physical, I already explained. Hardly anyone in the west eats a real diet of real food anymore, so their immune systems are going haywire.

      If you let these facts of how things are get to you, you’ll be weeping all the time.

      Deal with the is. The shoulds are nice to think about and good for personal development, but the is’s have to be dealt with first.

      Like


  48. on July 16, 2011 at 12:24 am Wagging Finger

    Bring back Roissy or at least spare me the terrible metaphors and the dramatic tone. It’s unbecoming.

    Having said that, my experience mirrors yours.

    Like


  49. those weren’t cuts, they were stretch marks

    Like


  50. Cutting is so SWPL.

    If an Asian girl ever brandished a knife you can be sure it’d be to cut off a man’s balls.

    The days when Asian women had the fortitude for jigai, the female version of seppuku are, alas, long gone. Any sense of shame or honor has long been blunted by material wealth and the intense betafication of once Imperial Asian men.

    Asian women don’t get “depressed.” They’ve never had that decadent freedom. Instead they adopt a steely-eyed resolve and use the only weapons they have–their sex and their wiles.

    Crazy hipster-grrrl sex might be the thing for you weekend X-games enthusiasts; but if you want a real thrill, try managing a harem of Asian women of different ages, never promising monogamy, and letting some of them meet each other. Fucking insane.

    Like


    • You’re right…I would NEVER cut myself. if I had to use s knife it will to cut my food or if need be SOMEONE else. hee! hee!

      Like


    • Asian girls don’t get depressed because they have no feelings to deal with.

      Like


      • that’s hurtful to say….. 😦 you just don’t know us.

        Like


      • Based on my empirical evidence, all asian girls are simple caricatures of human beings, I tried to be friends with them but all of them turned out to be stupid, cruel and/or severely whorish, both sexually and on the attention-whore category.

        Like


      • Sooo…I hear you’ve had pretty bad experiences….

        Like


      • Not really, I just distance myself from those whom I realize that don’t contribute to anything positive in my life.

        Like


      • When you say “Asian girls” do you mean real Asian girls or ethnic Asians raised in the West, or both? I notice a lot of difference between the two categories.

        Once I was taking Chinese lessons. Another student was an ethnic Asian, not fluent in Chinese, but she was also clearly not brought up in the US; her soft voice and her mannerisms made her stand out. So I was curious where she was from chatted with her; turned out she was from Korea.

        Like


      • Females of Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese, Filipino, Mongolian, etc origin. Regardless of whether they were raised on their homeland or just had Asian grandparents. There’s a lot of them on my college campus, some of them had been there for a couple of months, and some were born in the States, the tendency was the same.

        Maybe she was soft spoken, polite and educated, but I still believe Asians are cold-blooded and very very competitive, making them indifferent to true human emotions.

        I was very surprised when I met a Chinese girl who didn’t fall on those categories, turns out, she was born and raised in Venezuela, ergo, she behaved like a hispanic person.

        Like


  51. To King A, you spoke the truth! I also give props to Morris factor for his comments as well. Utilizing the powers of the “crimson arts” is not only lethal, but socially irresponsible if one is laying chicks that he knows has problems, then proceeds to pump-and-dump them, only to leave them more fucked up in the head. All for a piece of sweet muff? Some of you dudes on this site need your heads examined,scratch that, cut-the -fuck-off, if you think sleeping with mentally desturb/emotionally wrecked women is some form of conquest or ego-enhancement. I came to this site thinking Iwould learn game, I discovered some of the most vile,pathetic loosers I have ever witneesed in my life. I see why alot of you dudes is scared to get married /raise a family, KARMA’S A MUTHAFUCKA!

    Like


    • Morrisfactor says: Borderlines can appear to be very neat people at first (often do well in their careers) and are hot in bed, but this is an act – they were usually abandoned or neglected during infancy and have serious, lifelong issues of trust and overpowering feelings of loneliness and rage. They have a unique ability to “morph” into someone you think is cool, to almost draw from your goodness and mirror it back to you, so at first you really think you’ve hooked up with a great find.

      loveknoxxz, re-read it several times. If you still don’t get it, lemme know and I’ll elucidate.

      Your diatribe is largely misplaced.

      Like


      • Darn italics… Here, to seprate…

        loveknoxxz, re-read it several times. If you still don’t get it, lemme know and I’ll elucidate.

        Your diatribe is largely misplaced.

        Like


    • Modern women are the vilest, filthiest creatures known to mankind, and will not hesitate to ruin and emasculate a man if he’s careless.

      Like


      • Wow, hyperbolic much? Go on, tell us how you really feel.

        Like


      • Game, or the “crimson arts” as loveknoxzz put it, is nothing but an adaptive mechanism developed by smart men that in some aspects mirrors women’s deceitful nature, which is quite necessary in this era where women aren’t held in check anymore and are allowed to let their amorality run amok.

        Like


  52. This is some sick shit — I’ve endured some wack-O chicks, but never a “cutter”..

    Like


  53. on July 16, 2011 at 5:28 am Johnycomelately

    “Cutters have been abused.”

    I have never met a woman that didn’t say she waw abused….

    Like


    • No wonder. a girl who respects her body/emotions would NEVER have sex with an average reader of this blog. Seems that many of the readers here can’t offer anything more than casual sex. A girl who respects her emotional and physical health would never accept to be used as an object.

      Like


      • Seems that many of the readers here can’t offer anything more than casual sex

        Nothing goes past you, eh?
        It’s the other way around. There are women that offer casual sex. To alphas. This blog purpose is to show how to tap that resource.

        A girl who respects her emotional and physical health

        Like the cutter girl, right?

        A girl… would never accept to be used as an object.

        Yet, they offer themselves in exactly that fashion to Alphas, in droves.

        Like


      • They do offer themselves to alphas, but they always expect a relationship. Girls NEVER expect only sex. I can’t tell for women with ticking biological clocks, because they can’t expect relationship anymore and they are happy with just sex, probably. But this is not because they don’t need to be loved, it’s because they know it’s difficult for a man to fall in love with them, so they accept his sperm as all they are able to get.

        Like


      • Just the opposite. In their prime, they alpha cock hop like there’s no tomorrow. Whether there’s the Prince Charming somewhere in the back of their minds, they don’t show it much. Then when the bio clock starts ticking loudly and they near the wall and alphas lose an interest in them, then they “settle” with a beta provider. Sort of, until they have the Eat, Pray, Fuck epiphany, regardless their “commitment”. And why not, that is just a word which meaning can be shaped by their solipsism as they desire. Kids and hubby? These are just tools to be milked for what it is worth.

        Not all of women, but it’s a large chunk of them. That is the truth. You can sugarcoat and rationalize it as you please, but that does not change the truth.

        Like


      • I agree with you, many girls do behave like that and “abuse” guys the way you described, but as Roissy once said it himself …

        “[Editor: Theoretically, women can string men along until a better deal shows up, but remember that your window of attractiveness to the opposite sex is much larger than any woman’s. If any stringing along is to be done to the benefit of one party, it is usually the man’s.]”

        … the guys are usually worse.

        Like


      • @Maya Rationalization Hamster Alert

        Like


    • Johnycomelately: I have never met a woman that didn’t say she wa[s] abused…

      I have (largely) the same experience, and after the first couple, the fabulating attention-whores are easy to spot.

      But don’t discount just how pandemic the phenomenon is. We are children of the great disruption, and our women are the rotten, neglected fruit of the sexual revolution. Take advantage of the circumstances, or work to fix them. Most men understandably can’t help but prefer the former.

      Like


  54. One of my exes was a cutter and had cut marks on one of her wrists.

    I wish the batshit crazy bitch had cut her fucking throat instead.
    It would have spared me a world of trouble and angst.

    If only this blog was around ten years ago.

    Like


  55. I try to avoid fucked up girls who cut themselves.
    Seeing that shit makes me depressed, so I avoid any girls who show those signs.

    Like


  56. Cadnerd,

    “No. Respect has to be earned.”

    You’re very wrong. Everyone deserves to be treated with respect. Even those who have no self-respect. Maybe I wasn’t clear enough. I’m not saying you have to adore your psychotic lover if she has no qualities except her mental disease, with ‘respect’ I mean that you respect her feelings, her soul, her personality and not just use her to have sex with.

    “If/when a man (and woman too) happens to get into a beginning of a relationship with the borderline and once recognized as such, be grateful for whatever sex you managed to get, and break it off, fast.”

    NO woman on this planet is interested in “whatever sex she manages to get” from a psychotic man! So there was no need to say “and for woman too”. Your statement applies to men, exclusively. And not to just any man, but only to those with a serious antisocial personality disorder. Check it out, maybe you can self-diagnose yourself.
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antisocial_personality_disorder

    Like


    • on July 17, 2011 at 1:42 pm Reactionary_Konkvistador

      “Everyone deserves to be treated with respect.”

      Even creepy betas? * chuckles *

      Like


    • Maya,

      I agree with you to a point. You are correct that normal women should be treated with respect.

      The problem is that, in today’s society and culture, women have debased themselves almost to the point of being not worth it. We are NOT a normal generation. Women are not taught what a relationship should look like because so many homes are broken. With no father to interact with the mother, young girls do not see what a healthy long term relationship, let alone a marriage, is supposed to look like. So, since they might witness their mother with a new guy every month, they assume that sex is love. They know, on an instinctual level that what they’re doing isn’t right, but don’t understand why. So they keep trying it again and again and again ad nauseam until they either age out of the time they can, or they get bitter and frustrated.

      Women want a relationship. They want marriage. They want a strong man to build a life with. But, in current times, they don’t know how to do that. They’ve never seen how or been taught what to look for. They are attracted to the wrong man because of biology and never taught to curb that impulse.

      Most of them are also have some kind of mental problem (low self-esteem, entitlement complex, narcissism, etc.) that makes them unworthy of marriage. The end result is self-centred, attention whoring, drama queens that are not worth the effort to build any sort of life with. They are amoral to the point that they think nothing of taking a man for everything he’s got just because they can.

      I have some moral issues with Game because I do believe that it is trickery and manipulation. But, I have to use it because without it, I have no defense against the above types of women.

      The true tragedy of the current state of affairs is that both men and women are being short changed. Women that don’t want to ride the carousel are given no attention because they won’t sell themselves for cheap tricks. Men that want kids and marriage are so jaded that, many times, they simply don’t bother trying to find a woman that’s worth it.

      This society is caustic to any form of lasting relationship.

      I’ve taken to using Game as a sort of male Shit Test. The women that fall for it I don’t touch because if I can Game them, so can other men. If a woman that I’m interested in has integrity and self-respect then Game doesn’t work so well on her. Those rare women are the ones I’m interested in because they have actual worth. I won’t have my home become a gladiatorial arena every night because the wife has that much baggage.

      Men do share some of the blame for the current state of affairs, but it was women and Feminism that fucked things up so badly. Game is an adaptation to the current state of affairs. If women want to debase themselves this bad, men shouldn’t be held completely at fault for taking advantage of it. We’re hardwired to sleep with as many women as possible. Some take that opportunity, some don’t choose not too.

      I don’t agree with the “Pump ‘n’ Dump” mentality that many share. But I’m thirty years old and want a wife and family.

      Like


      • “I’ve taken to using Game as a sort of male Shit Test. The women that fall for it I don’t touch because if I can Game them, so can other men.”

        I agree with everything you wrote, except this one.
        I think game works on ALL women, the same as youth and beauty works on all men.

        Like


      • Game works to varying degrees on all women. However, there are women that don’t respond to it. They don’t jump into bed with whomever used it right away. They wait until a few weeks have passed. Most guys that are only after sex won’t wait that long.

        Like


      • You’re right about that. But that doesn’t mean that game doesn’t work on them. They were just taught that they have to be careful with men, which is very rarely told to girls these days. I mentioned somewhere that also my father was encouraging me to “have fun”, not to mention Cosmo and practically all feminist/liberal media which is all media.

        Like


      • Welp there it is. This post gave me the hard answers to my questions. The hard and sad truth from a level headed guy. When the level headed guys say this, its really heartbreaking (in the way that women have totally tainted it for *all* of us today).

        As much as I want a LTR or marriage, I’m sad to say if it doesn’t happen at a certain point, I may just fall in line with what the other girls are doing – i.e. find a casual hook up with someone younger when I’m in “need”, travel, hang out with family/friends and have a fulfilling life in other ways.

        Like


      • Yes, like you, I plan on having a fulfilling life in other ways except that I’ll probably die a virgin since I’m 100% convinced that I’d fall in love after the first casual hook up (which very rarely continue to ‘love’) and I’d have more problems with being heart-broken after sex than with not experiencing this whole thing at all. So I plan not to risk my emotional health and therefore not to have sex in my life. I’ll love my family/friends/other people instead and I’ll use some chemical to decrease my libido.

        Like


      • Maya my dear I just want you to know I am truly praying for you. You’ve been through a lot to be so young 🙂

        Maya,

        You have the right idea. i don’t think a casual hook up for a virgin is EVER a good idea. Especially one with your past. You are very fragile from what I can see and don’t need to exasperate that with casual sex or hooking up. Although most guys we lose our virginity to, we don’t end up with, usually its within the confines of a stable trusting relationship (the guy has made you feel loved and thus your willingness to give up your virginity to him). I lost mine at 18 (which I feel is the best time) with a guy my same age. Most 18 year old guys aren’t as hardcore with game and still have some of that “protective” quality in them when it comes to girls.

        But you are still young (26) and have great potential if you are honest with yourself about your issues (which you are) and willing to always be working at improving your mental health. But you are going to be dealing in a pool of experienced men, who today, (as you can see on these boards) are pretty hardcore when it comes to fulfilling their needs ONLY. The best advice I can give you is to VETT every guy as much as possible before committing yourself.

        And always remember, place value on a man’s actions and not his words. You’ll be fine if you just remember that.

        Like


      • Hey, thank you.

        I’m not naive by nature (even though I tried to force myself into this feminist thinking that we can walk around half-naked, ‘have fun’, … etc.) and most guys I meet are quite nice, also there are not many real alpha players around me. When I encounter the obvious losers who try to play super confident and aggressive (maybe they are reading blogs like this one), but their game is usually very transparent – it makes me feel disgusted/nauseated, so I think that if I follow my heart I will have no problems. I mean, the feeling of disgust is very useful in avoiding inappropriate/dishonest reproductive partners (men), isn’t it?

        Like


      • on July 18, 2011 at 6:09 pm Neil Hansen

        Do you like anal?

        Like


      • Hi Neil! how’s your day going? Good weather where you are?

        (MAYA)

        “I mean, the feeling of disgust is very useful in avoiding inappropriate/dishonest reproductive partners (men), isn’t it?”

        Not *just* disgust, but intuition & common sense as well. A woman knows a creep. She may lie to herself but you just KNOW it. The good thing is despite this blog, most men are not really that good at hiding their intentions. And if they are, not giving it up is one good way to lose a creep in 10 seconds. That is how I avoid a looooot of drama with men. I base them by their actions not their words and usually when they see they aren’t getting any, they’ll bounce to the next.

        Men are pretty practical and don’t think too deeply about things when it comes to relationships and women. They’re driven by sex (even the good ones) and often the level headed good ones can balance that need of sex with other things. You’ll also know a good one when you meet him. The ones I met I know within 5 secs. Usually, though they’re already taken *sigh*

        Like


      • Neecy and Maya,

        I don’t like being the bearer of bad news. Truth be told, I’m extremely disillusioned at the current state of affairs because I really don’t agree with most of society’s norms right now.

        My parents have been married for over thirty-two years. They’ve survived two job losses, the death of all of their parents, financial problems, etc. I watched my father sit broken while my mother was in surgery following a massive car accident. I’ve watched him take care of her while she was recovering, both from the accident and from the surgery.

        That kind of love and commitment is almost impossible now. When society primes children to treat everything (even people) as disposable, when Feminism tells women that men are useless, but to have a string of hook-ups with them, when women start to believe that they can be exactly like men, but better ….. it’s hard, if not impossible, for two people to come together like the previous generations did.

        There are still good men out there. But you won’t find them in a bar. You certainly won’t find them by giving it up to a casual hook-up. I’m not sure how a woman would go about finding one, but it isn’t by selling yourself out. Men use love to get sex, women use sex to get love. If women are giving sex away for free, why would a man have to love them? He’s being given what he wants with comparatively little work. Why would any sane person want to change that?

        I have to make sure that people understand that “good men” aren’t Beta. Betas cede authority to anyone in order to make their life smooth and generally deserve the amount of shit that gets heaped on them. Alphas lead. If a man is consistently taking charge, regardless of circumstances or popularity, chances are he’s not Beta.

        I was raised to believe in the traditional way of doing things. I’ve seen the traditional ways work. What’s old works, what’s new isn’t good. But, since I’ve seen what a real marriage looks like, I refuse to settle for the perversion that modern “marriage” has become. If that means I stay alone, so be it. I will not sacrifice my convictions for what I’m being offered.

        I will probably be labeled as Beta by the guys around here, but … eh. I don’t have to prove anything to Internet folk.

        Good luck.

        Like


      • Matt,

        I don’t think there was anything “beta” about your response. You see it for what it is and recognize while its not ideal for you, one has to do what they have to do. And that is exactly the point I am coming to as well in terms of love/relationships. it makes no sense whatsoever to marry or be in a LTR with broken or damaged people (unless they are getting together themselves). Its just not worth it. I knew things were bad, but this site really opened my eyes as to what is really going on between men and women.

        When you have a breakdown of family morals and values in a society, its pretty much doomed.

        Like


      • Matt, marry me? 🙂 No, I really hope I’ll be able to find someone who thinks like you do. My sister told me a few days ago that I have a possibility of 1:10 000 to find a man who still believes in traditional marriage. She’s wrong, obviously, but there are still not many men like that … Or they will become like that, but only after maybe 10 years, when for us girls iwill be too late.

        Like


      • Matt:

        You’re very observant about the social dynamic these days …

        We are NOT a normal generation. Women are not taught what a relationship should look like because so many homes are broken.

        … but you’re too pessimistic:

        women have debased themselves almost to the point of being not worth it.

        The women themselves aren’t worthless, they’ve just been poorly trained, and they are surrounded by a degraded culture that encourages the “low self-esteem, entitlement complex, narcissism … self-centered attention whoring, drama queen [syndrome].”

        Women know deep down that something is amiss. It doesn’t take too long or much skill to knock them off their pedestal, and for the most part they will appreciate the correction, if not at first or openly, then eventually and privately (without being able to articulate the transformation, which, of course, is also the man’s job). The younger you snag them and arrest the corruption, the less engrained the malignancy, and the easier the retraining is. But you will be battling uphill the whole time against beta supplicants and a preponderance of cultural lies. Regression is all too easy for them.

        So ours is a life of vigilance. Guardianship is a noble life for a man. Who told us we were entitled to an easy mission or a simple hunt? Embrace the challenge.

        This is our lot, the situation we were born into and cannot completely escape; we suck it up and make it better for the next generation. In another era the women might have been more feminine. In other times we would have had an assist from the institutions around us. But … the best we could have done was landing the least ugly chick who just happened to be born in our internet-less, road-less, isolated village who wasn’t already vacuumed up Till Death Did She Part by some well-connected slob.

        We don’t realize just how unusual it is in the history of mankind to even see a photograph of a gorgeous woman, much less have immediate access to millions of them, much less be in instant communication with women worldwide. Your dusty, one-stoplight town sucks? You are a car-drive or plane-ride away from millions of eights, thousands of nines, and hundreds of tens. The superabundance skews our perspective. We imagine our challenges should be as easily resolved in life as they are on an iPhone. The lesson of this blog is, we are in the age of oversupply, secured by minimal effort, well before the (inevitable) cultural backlash makes landing a good woman statistically difficult again.

        We tend to focus on the disadvantages rather of the extraordinary opportunities of our situation. It helps to have a good grounding in history to keep perspective, but that’s another deficiency of our age….

        Like


  57. Dear Cadnerd,

    “If/when a man (and woman too) happens to get into a beginning of a relationship with the borderline and once recognized as such, be grateful for whatever sex you managed to get, and break it off, fast.”

    FACT: women are not interested in “whatever sex they manage to get” from a psychotic person. This is an interest of a man, exclusively. A man with an antisocial personality disorder.

    Like


  58. DSM diagnostic criteria for an antisocial personality disorder:

    A) There is a pervasive pattern of disregard for and violation of the rights of others occurring since age 15 years, as indicated by three or more of the following:

    1. failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors as indicated by repeatedly performing acts that are grounds for arrest;
    2. deception, as indicated by repeatedly lying, use of aliases, or conning others for personal profit or pleasure;
    3. impulsiveness or failure to plan ahead;
    4. irritability and aggressiveness, as indicated by repeated physical fights or assaults;
    5. reckless disregard for safety of self or others;
    6. consistent irresponsibility, as indicated by repeated failure to sustain consistent work behavior or honor financial obligations;
    7. lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt, mistreated, or stolen from another;

    I’m afraid many of the readers of this blog have at least 2., 5., 7. Enough for the diagnosis.

    Like


    • This comment is actually revealing a lot about you, despite your attempt to shame the readers, The mask finally slipped.

      Like


      • the mask was always a bit askew.

        i’ve read her first posts from a few weeks ago, and with each successive post it becomes more and more apparent that she’s one of the aforementioned ‘borderline’ cases.

        maya,

        get some help. seriously.

        Like


      • Wow 🙂

        Dear Cadnerd,

        I really was thinking about you when I copy-pasted this from the Wikipedia page (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antisocial_personality_disorder). The reason was that you recommend scary things like “be grateful for whatever sex you manage to get” from a mentally ill person (in the post where you recommend that, we were talking about the girls who have borderline personality disorder). It made me think that a person who’s recommending abuse of mentally ill must be mentally afflicted himself.

        Like


      • Reading comprehension disability?

        Again: Morrisfactor says: Borderlines can appear to be very neat people at first (often do well in their careers) and are hot in bed, but this is an act – they were usually abandoned or neglected during infancy and have serious, lifelong issues of trust and overpowering feelings of loneliness and rage. They have a unique ability to “morph” into someone you think is cool, to almost draw from your goodness and mirror it back to you, so at first you really think you’ve hooked up with a great find.

        Like


      • And your translation:

        “If/when a man (and woman too) happens to get into a beginning of a relationship with the borderline and once recognized as such, be grateful for whatever sex you managed to get, and break it off, fast.”

        =GUYS, BE GRATEFUL FOR WHATEVER SEX YOU MANAGED TO GET FROM A MENTALLY ILL PERSON! JUST RUN AWAY, QUICKLY.

        Like


      • “(and woman too)”

        Honey, NO women on this planet would be grateful for getting whatever sex she managed from a lover with mental illness. Only a man can be grateful for that. A man with antisocial personality disorder.

        Like


      • Cadnerd, dear, so we came to the core of your delusion.

        Guys and girls.

        Why a woman would be grateful to have sex (= get pregnant) with a mentally ill man? Can you answer to this question?

        Why a man would be grateful? To spread his genes, although with low probability for these kids to survive/reproduce further, but still, there is a chance for that, no matter how minimal.

        Like


      • Cadnerd,

        You’re saying ‘boys and girls’.

        Why any woman would be grateful to get whatever sex she managed (=get pregnant) from a mentally ill men?

        (Why a man would be: to spread his genes, although the future of these kids won’t be perfect, there’s still a chance they’ll be able to reproduce further).

        Like


      • And my translation: If/when a man (and woman too) happens to get into a beginning of a relationship with the borderline and once recognized as such, be grateful for whatever sex you managed to get, and break it off, fast.

        I bolded certain words so you can’t miss them.

        In my particular case, I avoid them like a plague. 10ft pole is not long enough.

        Like


      • Guys and girls, Maya, guys and girls.

        Like


      • Read the anonymous right below (July 16, 2011 at 7:45 am), for more elucidation.

        Like


      • Cadnerd,

        check my new comments above your bolded one.

        Like


      • No need. your mantra is getting tiresome.

        Like


      • on July 16, 2011 at 2:40 pm bored with you

        If by help you mean sucking on a tailpipe then I’ll agree to that.

        Who really cares what the attention whore wants or needs? Life is too short to care about human refuse like her.

        I never understand why the obvious attention whores get so much of what they want here. Go out and give the attention whores what they seek in real life so you can at least get something tangible out of the deal. If something has value it isn’t given away for free. At least mow the lawn or wash my car if you want my attention.

        Like


    • Maya said: “I’m afraid many of the readers of this blog have at least 2., 5., 7. Enough for the diagnosis.”

      Personal attacks (e.g., “You’re a big doodiehead!”) are poor argument of the issue at hand.

      Like


    • What do you call a person who doesn’t “fit” your narrative? Well, ok, maybe parts of #7.
      7. “lack of remorse, as indicated by being indifferent to or rationalizing having hurt”

      Like


  59. The intense sex that a crazy “cutter” or any crazy can offer can easily cloud a man’s judgement.

    You have to be carefull not to be carried away with the intesity of the sex and mistake it for emotional connection or get hooked on the buzz of a great fuck.

    You would also be suprised what a crazy bitch will (initially) do sexually to make you like her or to increase her value to you.

    Often it’s a Bait and Switch ploy and will eventually lead into manipulation via emotional blackmail which can (if you let it) mess with your head.

    Like


  60. By the way Roissy and co; you should write something about women’s use of emotional blackmail as a tool of controlling beta men.

    Like


    • When they cry in front of you about stuff… kick back, have a beer, ask “Are you done yet?” (if not have another, repeat as necessary).

      Like


  61. I’ve been with a cutter for a while. What others before said: Great, great sex. Everywhere. Inside, outside, parking lot, on the highway, at the beach.. And she was a great girl, too. Smart and I’m sure she’ll accomplish a lot. Stopped cutting herself somewhere during our time together.

    Like


    • Yes, yes, on a boat with a goat, in the box with a fox. Just imagine what would happen if you stayed together and one day you bought a wrong kind of shish kebob. Or something equally banal happened. Luck was with you.

      Like


  62. I once dated a cutter fucked like a pro. Genuine pro. She was also a huge slut, severe depression, anxiety issues, panic attacks, and self-esteem problems. The crazier they are, the sluttier.I definitely look for this when I pick up women because they are the easier lay. Neg neg neg and say one thing about them being pretty and your golden.

    Like


    • Dre, you’re just another case of severe antisocial personality disorder.

      Severe depression, anxiety issues, panic attacks, self-esteem problems, frequent changing of sexual partners … WHO CARES

      AS LONG AS SHE FUCKED LIKE A PRO.

      And … Dre even looks for such women, because they are EASIER LAYS.

      Are you guys crazy? I though Roissy’s story was a bit romantic and a bit tongue-in-cheek, trying to have a therapeutic effect when talking about serious matters in a humorous way …

      BUT some of the readers seem to be a real PSYCHOPATHS.

      Like


    • Dre, you’re just another case of severe antisocial personality disorder.

      Severe depression, anxiety issues, panic attacks, self-esteem problems, frequent changing of sexual partners … WHO CARES

      AS LONG AS SHE FUCKED LIKE A PRO.

      And … Dre even looks for such women, because they are EASIER LAYS.

      Are you guys crazy? I though Roissy’s story was a bit romantic and a bit tongue-in-cheek, trying to have a therapeutic effect when talking about quite serious matters in a humorous way …

      Maybe I was wrong?

      Like


      • Dre, I seriously hope you wrote your post only to provoke the readers… In case it wasn’t just a joke/provocation, I have to tell you, you’re a PSYCHOPATH.

        Like


      • I suspect he’s just trolling.

        BPD is an awful serious disorder, a huge burden on both people in the relationship. Anyone who jokes about it like that clearly never tried to have a serious relationship with a BPD sufferer. Anyone with a sister or gf who actually tried to kill herself or left the house running hysterically in the middle of the night knows it ain’t no joke. To worry about someone you love who’s constantly reckless, raging and self-destructive is a terrifying experience.

        Like


      • Depressed chicks need love too. Dre is giving them what they want. That’s not antisocial, that’s emphatic and loving. Dre can see past their flaws, unlike you,and see their good side. He is a role model to us all.

        Like


      • He’s giving them what they want, sees past their flaws … That’s all true. But these chicks (like all women on this planet) believe that having sex with someone also means being in love with this person. They believe that someone really accepts them for what they are, with all their flaws and still falls in love with them. But when he just ‘uses’ them for sex and then leaves them, they find out how wrong they were and realize that they are not worth anything more than being an object for someone’s pleasure, just to fuck and discard after that. And that their life and feelings are worthless.

        I hope he was just trolling, yes, but I’ve noticed this kind of thinking in many posts :-S

        Like


      • But these chicks (like all women on this planet) believe that having sex with someone also means being in love with this person.

        Believe they may, but that doesn’t make it so. See my quip on oxytocin and infatuation.

        Also, on another thread, you stated being 26 and never being kissed. Do you think that the scaring in you face or in other places can have something to do with it?

        I mean, DUH!

        Like


      • It’s like you’re advertising your mental disorder. Granted, there is a positive in it, they guys you meet can clearly see the warning: “Caution. I’m damaged goods!” For that, you deserve credit.

        Like


      • Cadnerd,

        🙂

        I’m not advertising my mental disorder and I definitely don’t feel like damaged goods (maybe just a little). Scars on my face are almost invisible already and they certainly have nothing to do with my empty love life.

        What did you mean with oxytocin?

        Like


      • Oxytocin is a hormone released upon gina tingle, causing “falling in love” or rather infatuation. Girls confuse it with love, but alas, after time (varies per induhvidual), it’s flushed and the poor girl ponders where the love went. It was not there in the first place, someone forgotten to tell her that infatuation not eq love and that is something to be worked on/out. With the entitlement culture, there’s a fat chance that even if she’s told, she’d register it.

        Clear enuff?

        Like


      • Scars on my face are almost invisible already and they certainly have nothing to do with my empty love life.

        There must be something, a vibe, or such, you send out so there are no takers. Based on your posts here, I’d say that it is nearly effortless.

        Like


      • Cadnerd,

        I agree with you on that. There are sooo many girls who behave like that. Until recently I thought they are the ‘normal’ ones and that it’s me who ‘has no idea’ (as an argument they used that I had no experience with boys anyway, so I’m not qualified to comment), but now I see how childish they are, I feel sorry for them.

        Like


      • Cadnerd,

        “Based on your posts here, I’d say that it is nearly effortless.”

        What do you mean? (my English again 😛 I really don’t understand)

        Like


      • What do you mean? (my English again 😛 I really don’t understand)

        Same as Spiralina noted. You’ve got a lot of skeletons in your closet = issues, and it shows. No doubt in your personal interactions, it is as clear or even more so, transmissioned via body language beside your verbal communication..

        Like


      • Cadnerd,

        I’ve explained most of my issues (at least those relevant for this blog) in other comments and I don’t think it’s so bad at all. I have to fix some things, but more or less I’m fine.
        I feel like damaged goods from time to time, sometimes I feel old, but mostly I’m quite okay. In the past I purposefully avoided male attention.
        Well, I hope I’ll be able to find a husband despite all this. I know I might not be perfect, but I try to be a positive person and not to judge people before I know them well (I still do that sometimes, on this blog as well), so I think it won’t be impossible to put up with me.

        Like


      • Perhaps.

        You need to start interacting with men, face to face. An exercise….

        Stand in front of a mirror and remember something pleasant which puts a smile on your ace. Look at yourself and check your eyes whether they “smile” too. A smile, not a smirk. Repeat daily, with remembering other things of that nature.

        Now go and do.

        Like


      • I do that already. It works 🙂

        Like


      • I mean, I don’t know about this exercise, but being kind to people definitely works.

        Like


      • As he said, he dated the cutter chick. He accepted her for who she was and she was clearly valued as he was with her. Her life and feelings were highly valued.

        Also, if the other chicks are sluts as he says, they probably have learnt by now that one night stands don’t tend to lead to relationships. As such they are seeking the pleasure of sex and a mind blowing orgasm, which he likely gives them.

        Like


      • I was just speaking the truth. I was this girl’s best friend for a while and tried everything i could to make her happy and be there for her. But it all fell apart in the end. I do have sympathy but have seen the true side of BPD because it ruined a great friendship.

        Like


    • Was with a woman for eight years who was raised by a clinical psychopath… no cutting, but pretty much them same. Great match for invulnerable folk who like a lot of sex, though. Otherwise, the craziness will outweigh the sex after a little bit.

      Like


  63. Cutting is disgusting. Women who do this are always fishing for sympathy. You did it to yourself. It was chosen for dramatic effect. Its more calculated than but in the same vein as manipulative crying.

    Like


  64. This is very interesting. Being a Black woman I can say that I have never heard nor do I know of any Black woman doing this. I think this definitley must be cultural/racial? Its funny b/c I think women of different cultures/races may handle feelings of pain, anxiety, discomfort in different ways for many different reasons. However, Didn’t realize this was so common with women in general.

    Like


    • WOW FASCINATING THATS REALLY INTERSTING

      Like


    • I’m a white woman and I’ve never done this. I don’t really know any that have.

      Like


      • I don’t think this is something *every* White woman does, but it seems this is a common trend among White women on how they cope with pain or depression or anxiety. I’m curious as to why White women cut vs. say Black women being outwardly loud, constantly having up a defense mechanism (b/c they feel people will mistreat and walk over them ) or overeating (contributing to high obesity amongst our group). It’s the same issue just a different way of coping with it that makes me curious on what those driving factors are. Also, b/c White women typically have it better than most women globally, I wonder what drives these feelings of anxiety and hoplessness.

        Like


      • Usually deep wounds from childhood. Shame, guilt, anger

        Like


  65. Sometimes when you get off work don’t you wanna crack a beer and relax? What’s the difference between that and some light cutting?

    Like


  66. If a guy after work goes and cracks up a couple of beers to relax, how is that much different from a light cutter who does it to release pleasure hormones?

    Like


    • False equivalence. She should eat a fucking chocolate instead! (not the whole bar, just a fraction)

      Like


      • That’s what I do…unfortunatley.

        Like


      • Cutting or the whole bar? Let me enlarge the pic… I see.

        Fraction!

        Like


      • Oh Caddy You have no idea how me and Sees Candies have gotten down. LOL But I’m working at getting there – hence metamorphosis – Its happening. i’m trying to turn my down periods from chocolate and gambling to exercising and eating right. And i must say the benefits are happening slowly but surely. Its a real mental challenge for someone to be viligant in exercising and eating right. Not quite where I want to be yet, but I’m getting there 😉

        Like


      • Heh.I can imagine yours and Sees warm relationship. Quite common amongst femalians to get that fix going and going and going. Good luck with your metamorphosis.

        Like


      • There is NOTHING like Sees candies. Nothing. LOL I now treat myself every once in awhile, but i limit myself to only 2 pieces.

        Like


      • Chocolate cake makes you fat and lazy. Light cutting i.e.: With a needle, doesn’t leave marks, heals in a day and gives you your endorphine fix.

        Like


  67. I dated a crazy, hot, Borderline chic.

    If she is hot, if she rages over nothing, if she cuts herself, if she loves doing things to try and make you jealous or squirm…..you can bet your ass she is a cluster B nutcase.

    Like


  68. While a woman who cuts herself may be great in bed, she’s also got a good chance of having a borderline personality disorder and of being a risk for suicide. Dangerous to play with people like that. Handle with care.

    It is indeed quite dangerous to play with a woman who is already falling apart. I don’t cut myself, but I have tried to kill myself, and I think about it quite often, especially 7 days before my period (PMS)- usually the hardest time for me. If it wasn’t for the pain that my death would cause my family, I would have long escaped this prison I’m in.

    Like


    • OMG I’m so sorry to hear this. That really must be tough. I hope you get the help you deserve and that whatever it is that plagues you, you can overcome it.

      Like


    • on July 18, 2011 at 8:11 pm (R)Evolutionary

      You need to go see a good alternative/natural medicine physician. You’re being poisoned by your own hormones, which is a big contributor to these mood issues. Get that sorted, and get some good neurological & mood support and you’ll feel much, much better, I promise.

      Like


  69. Neecy, although you may not have heard of black women in the USA doing cutting, but a quick look at past National Geographic issues will show you plenty of African black men and women who mutilate themselves in any number of ways.

    Some of the women are mutilated without their input being asked, but rather their compliance by allowing others to do it without fighting to the death, or seeking revenge afterward. But, especially the men mutilate themselves. They wrap their dicks in cloth, causing super large penises. They punch holes in their ear that grow large enough to drive a mini-cooper through. Insertion of all kinds of things below the surface of the skin to cause ridges. Tatoos…just look at how Mike Tyson messed up his face.

    Like


    • Hmm you make a good point about tatooes and peircings.

      But I’m guessing for the Africans, unfortunatley its more for cultural/tradition than just voluntarily mutilating themselves to deal with pain.

      Like


  70. My best advice for suicidal people (I used to think about it a lot) based on my now many years of life is this:

    Life is so short, suicide seems like a futile gesture. Just wait. Time will solve your problem before you know it. Meanwhile, have fun. Love someone. Be a good friend. Be interesting. Laugh. Surprisingly, life can be very enjoyable.

    BTW, before we get all sensitive and all (A danger when nice girls are hanging out), to the people who think the readers and writers of this blog are heartless, bad people. All we are doing is responding to female demands. All males do this, of most species. Have you wondered why male birds in hot, food rich climates have bright plumage? They attract females. It’s more important than other traits, like helping rear the young. In cold, food challenged environments, the males are much plainer, but sure help with the kids. Just think of the penguins.

    I am sure you can see how this translates to the human condition. In the end, women elicit from the men the behavior they demand. Every male reader of this blog understands this. The women, not so much it seems.

    Like


    • on July 18, 2011 at 7:51 pm Emma the Emo

      Good advice. Not sure if it would help those with chemical imbalances in their brains, as they aren’t thinking clearly and often can’t be reasoned with. But still, very good advice. I always thought – you can always die later, whenever you want, so you might as well wait for a while. If things get too bad, you can always escape whenever you want through suicide, but for now you should stay and see what happens.

      Like


      • i heard on pbs that womens troubles are worsening due to too much hairdye and tatoo ink. When Pelosi gets back in, i want her to look into it

        Like


      • on July 18, 2011 at 8:26 pm Emma the Emo

        Where did you hear that? A link would be appreciated.

        Like


      • some stripper friend ofmine told me during our weekly political discussions. you remind me of her

        Like


      • Fire, this is NOT the neg thread! Heh.

        Both your comments here are a top quality material, though.

        Like


  71. OT: Did somebody else notice? Professor Snape was apparently a beta!

    Like


  72. I’m not a cutter. I don’t have borderline personality, nor bipolar disorder or depression. I never took Prozac or any other drug. I’ve had some sad moments in life like anybody else, but I overcame them all. I like outdoor sports, music, all in all I am a happy woman..

    Does is mean I suck in bed?

    Like


  73. yes

    Like


    • Lol… I’ve already noticed that many guys love troubled women – and, unlike Roissy, they really stick to them in LTR.

      I wonder why.

      Like


      • First, many guys grew up wit the notion that LTR is how it’s supposed to be and what is expected of them. A rudiment from times BFE when the world was not yet fully fucked up. That notion is now changing, due to several factors. Young men that have no connection to the old world tend to avoid LTR (let alone marriage), because it is the only logical way to respond to the milieu that is quite men unfriendly.

        Second, it is often not apparent that the woman is “troubled”. Maya notwithstanding, the girls may have some quirkiness that may seem to be mild and who’s perfect? It may also be that they are somewhat distinct from the “normal” yet utterly shallow girl pool.The problem is that it may take years before the full scope of the “troubled” manifests in the borderlines. The signposts are usually there, but one tends to gloss over it for the sake of peace in the relationship. It is a common mistake, because It takes experience (or this blog) to realize that the signposts were a fair warning.

        Like


      • I agree with your first argument but I disagree with the second. Some women are clearly troubled. I’ve met several of them (in fact, most women nowadays seem to be somehow troubled) who were even open about her issues/disorders and I think it’s odd how some men are drawn to them. They like stormy relationships and I don’t think it’s just about sex, as it sometimes start even before any sex contact.

        Maybe it is some martyr syndrome.

        Like


      • You may disagree all you want, I drew that from personal experience. My first X’s borderline started to manifest after 4 years. In 10 years, it was in full bloom. I did not subsribe to stormy relationship in the first place hence that “X”.

        Like


      • Maybe you are an exception, Cadnerd. I drew what I wrote from my observation.

        Like


      • Men that are abused growing up have an almost super-human ability to find and date unstable women.

        The current misandrist climate tells men that they are barely worth anything. I’d say that qualifies as “lightly abused”.

        Like


      • Heavy drinking, substance abuse, promiscuity, mood swings and other self-destrutive acts… The signs are so clear.

        Someone who is so attrated (and not only sexually) to a self-destrutive person when there are so many other options is probably somehow troubled.

        Like


      • That is sometimes the case. But generalizations aren’t that helpful when the borderline appears to be entirely normal at first. Check the medical literature, it is quite common that the borderline/BPD is be dormant for long periods of time

        Curious, why you asking when you already know the answers?

        Like


      • I’m just guessing (that’s why I wrote “probably”) and I’d like to read what others have to say.

        Like


  74. but hopefully d… not lolipop

    Like


  75. Still have my name carved in a girls leg. They are the best lays, but the thing is, they make most other girls look like droopy-boobed fat chicks who just lay there and do nothing.

    It’s a hard act to follow.

    Like


  76. “Do women, then, cut because of negative emotions filling their hearts? A study states it is so, drawing relevance with ancient religious practices of self-flagellation to cleanse the soul of impurities.”

    I have six cuts on my life wrist and a pale blue stitch still intact at the bottom rung. I couldn’t afford for the doctor to pull them out so I did it myself. Why do we cut? In this case, it was a half hearted suicide attempt in the early twenties. We all know you cut vertically when you want to do yourself in.

    Like


  77. Do we make great lays? I’ve been told by the few boyfriends I’ve had that I’m probably the best lay, kinda a lazy lay cuz I prefer missionary but we are definitely intense lovers.

    Like


  78. Cutters are 100% an American female phenomenon. American females are horrible at sex. Sure, they’ll have abused themselves passing themselves around like a tray of cakes enough they’re good at blowjobs and 101 positions, but … well, if that’s your criterion for “good,” you’re talking about something else.
    Come to think of it, they were all Borderline as well.
    *shudders at the bad memories*

    Also, I make note that the comments thread on this subject reaches new lows for epic retardation, and is almost total noise, except for this line by King A “We are children of the great disruption, and our women are the rotten, neglected fruit of the sexual revolution..”

    Like


    • “American females are horrible at sex. Sure, they’ll have abused themselves passing themselves around like a tray of cakes enough they’re good at blowjobs and 101 positions, but … well, if that’s your criterion for “good,”

      what is your definition of good sex? Just curious…..

      Like


  79. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_cases_of_penis_removal
    In October 1999, in Cambodia, A jealous woman slashed her cheating husband’s throat and chopped up his penis after learning he planned to leave her for a younger woman. The Khmer-language Rasmei Kampuchea newspaper said mother-of-five Pao Eng, 46, “used a big chopper to cut her sleeping husband’s throat twice and then chopped off his penis and destroyed it with the chopper”. “I wanted to give the chopped penis to the mistress as a warning to stay away from other people’s husbands,” the report quoted the wife, from the eastern Cambodian province of Kompong Cham, as telling police.

    On November 9, 2001, in Hong Kong, China Poon Shuk-yee, age 27, cut off Chan Chi-keung’s, aged 35, penis with a paper cutter after he insisted they break up when she refused marriage. She then allegedly requested one last night of passion and while performing a sexual act, on him, she sliced his penis off. Chan’s penis was reattached.

    Like


  80. on July 17, 2011 at 1:17 am College Grad

    Man, this is fucked up. As someone who works with cutters on a weekly basis, it really is no joke. These chicks need help. I agree with your premise though, many of them are depressed to the point of dependence on male attention. I can’t bring myself to take advantage of that though. And for those you of you that think it’s a ploy you’re retarded. End of story.

    Like


  81. on July 17, 2011 at 2:08 am Big Game Hunter

    My first post here, so: Thanks for the great blog! I only stumbled upon it recently, but have already spent…. what, ten hours reading older posts and new. Excellent stuff, although intensely painful at times, whenever I read some bit of wisdom and then immediately facepalm, recognizing some of my past errors dealing with women.

    Now a question and/or a sort of request to Roissy himself. is there any TOP 15 Citizen Renegade Game Posts list or something like this? You know, if you could pick, say, 15 of your posts that a guy should read to get some understanding of women and game, what would be the most important?

    Muchos gracias…

    Like


  82. Have you guys seen Black Snake Moan? It’s a film about a girl who’s looking for love by having casual sex. Everyone here should see it …

    http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0462200/

    Like


    • Why? There is dime a dozen of these out there. And the “love” they are looking for in reality is the oxytocin high, IOW, infatuation.

      Once the oxytocin levels decline, they look for more “love” by hopping on another cock. For some it’s quick, for others it lingers longer. But most of them girls confuse the infatuation with love.

      Like


      • I actually agree that some girls behave like that … They have sex with someone and then they are “in love”, but soon they find out that their lover is not “good enough” and move on … More often, their lover never calls them back …

        I think the problem is that they don’t really know their lover well and they believe that with having sex they create the intimacy and “love”. And that all the personality flaws of their boyfriend will disappear and theirs will be forgiven as well. I guess that’s why it usually lasts only a few months, what do you think?

        But not everyone is looking just for oxytocin highs … I’m not. And I think many other girls are not that naive.

        I really recommend you the movie I mentioned.

        Like


      • Yup, that’s the reason for the “four-year itch” leading to divorce when the kid produced by the marriage is out of diapers,

        Like


    • Maya, you have issues. Pretty serious ones. I think you’re aware of this, which is good. What’s not good is looking for validation on a blog like this one, which is a space for men to share their opinions without censorship or worrying about hurting people’s (read:women’s) feelings.

      You’re airing out a lot of personal business here and you seem to take things that are said personally. As an outsider, you might want to consider whether a place like this is good for your mental health.

      Like


      • Ummmm, what kind of issues do I have, if you mind telling me?

        “As an outsider, you might want to consider whether a place like this is good for your mental health.”

        WTF? Mind explaining?

        (Don’t take this post as a personal attack, please)

        Like


      • Just reading through the comments lately, you’ve posted a lot about your trust issues with men, poor self-image, hinted at abuse/mental issues etc. You also seem to react personally when people post things you disagree with. I’m just going from what I’ve read. I don’t think you’ll find reassurance from the men here; that’s not the point of this place.

        If I’m wrong, feel free to disregard everything I said. It’s intended in a friendly way, not to put you down.

        Like


      • “… is a space for men to share their opinions without censorship or worrying about hurting people’s (read:women’s) feelings. ”

        I think it’s great when people share their true beliefs/emotions without censorship or worrying what other people might think about them.
        Isn’t that great? I’m happy for everyone who’s not afraid to be what he is and who doesn’t have to worry constantly whose feelings are going to be hurt.

        Like


      • Yes but this is not the type of forum you are looking for imo.
        I wonder why are you here, to learn about type of guys that have hurt you in the past or to try to change them or “make them see the truth” or what…
        Fighting your own battles…

        Spiralina is right on the spot.

        Like


      • I’m here because I like men. I was always afraid of them because of what happened to me in the past, but now I have a feeling it’s time to stop trying to avoid what I can’t really avoid. I want to get married soon, so I thought I’ll find some ideas on this blog on what to do. I’m far from disappointed.

        “to learn about type of guys that have hurt you in the past”

        So you’re claiming that on this blog there is a ‘type of guys’ who are capable of hurting a woman?

        (I think it’s possible that there could be some psychopaths who just want to take advantage of women, as I mentioned above, but I believe most of the readers are not like that.)

        Like


      • Maya, you say you’re 26 and have never kissed a man. You also say you’re afraid of men and have a history of self-mutilation, including cutting your face. These will be huge red flags for any sane, decent man looking to get married.

        I really think you need therapy to address the fear that’s been holding you back for so long. And while you’re in therapy, go out on a few dates and get to know men as human beings without the pressure of “I need to find a husband.” You will not be able to discern a good man from reading about them on the internet. If anything, you’ll pick up a lot of bad ideas that will confuse you.

        I’m telling you the truth. Take it or leave it.

        Like


      • i meant hurting in emotional sense.

        You came here for the ideas on how to get married?? LOL

        I believe that you are labeling people too much: if they want to fuck and forget they are psychopaths?!

        And i also think that you are projecting your own issues all over this blog.

        I took a time to read your other posts as well, and i think that you have some serious issues. My amateurish diagnosis is BPD or Bipolar, i might be wrong of course.

        I think too that the name of this blog is not freetherapy.com, and that you should find another one that suits you better.

        I think that you are immature and have emotional intelligence of a 13-15 year old, not to be ashamed though! (read Daniel Golemans-Emotional Inteligence)

        I think that you got a lot of informations here but that your “situation” is getting the best of you, you got it all wrong and are very confused, and i also beg you not to use the word Alpha anymore, because its obvious that you have no clue what it represents .

        I think that you are annoying when you speak in the name of all women, which is something you do 99% of the time.

        I also think that you are in a way a hypocrite when you give advices to everyone but you are (as you said) still a virgin and had no bf’s, so whats your credibility and experience in romantic life except , disney movies and fairy tales?
        Do you know what it feels like having a relationship?

        I also think that you should stop with self pity and trying to get compassion and make everyone your therapist here.

        And finally i think that because of the abuse that you have experienced you started living in an imaginery world where you are waiting for a knight in white armor, which only gives you temporary relief, but in the long run fuckup you life in reality.

        And i recommend that you get yourself together, get some professional help and work on your self, and before anything, start living in reality.
        It may not be pink, shiny and happy uthopia where everyone loves everyone but its the only reality.
        And then, when you heal, you will see how fucking can be good just for the sake of it , even if he’s not promising unconditional love after it.

        I don’t mean to hurt your feelings,because i know you have suffered a lot so think about this as a tough love…

        Like


      • also think that you are in a way a hypocrite when you give advices to everyone but you are (as you said) still a virgin and had no bf’s, so whats your credibility and experience in romantic life except , disney movies and fairy tales?
        Do you know what it feels like having a relationship?

        I also think that you should stop with self pity and trying to get compassion and make everyone your therapist here.

        And finally i think that because of the abuse that you have experienced you started living in an imaginery world where you are waiting for a knight in white armor, which only gives you temporary relief, but in the long run fuckup you life in reality.

        And i recommend that you get yourself together, get some professional help and work on your self, and before anything, start living in reality.
        It may not be pink, shiny and happy uthopia where everyone loves everyone but its the only reality.
        And then, when you heal, you will see how fucking can be good just for the sake of it , even if he’s not promising unconditional love after it.

        I don’t mean to hurt your feelings,because i know you have suffered a lot so think about this as a tough love.

        Like


      • That was the 2nd part.

        Here goes the first:

        Like


      • Just noting the anon above isn’t me!

        Like


      • Its not you i am trying to send the whole for a day, mods hate me 😀

        Like


      • Oh i’ll just give up..
        Just a few more words for Maya.
        You are projecting your issues all over this blog.
        You are speaking in the name of all women 99% of the time.
        The name of this blog is not freetherapy.com
        I think that you are immature and have emotional intelligence of a 13-15 year old, not to be ashamed though! (read Daniel Golemans-Emotional Inteligence)

        Like


      • “I think that you are immature and have emotional intelligence of a 13-15 year old, not to be ashamed though!”

        I agree with you. The reason is that since the age of 13 nothing relevant happened to me in emotional sense. I tried not to feel my emotions, because it was too painful and all I did was only waiting and waiting … I looked normal on the outside (finished school, study, traveled, had friends), but it was fake. But I couldn’t fake any passion or true interest in life, so maybe some people thought that I’m a bit passive and shy, I don’t know. I can’t grow up now.

        “I also think that you are in a way a hypocrite when you give advices to everyone but you are (as you said) still a virgin and had no bf’s, so whats your credibility and experience in romantic life except , disney movies and fairy tales? Do you know what it feels like having a relationship?”

        No, I have no idea what it feels like having a relationship 😦 People tell me same things in my real life as you do now …

        “And finally i think that because of the abuse that you have experienced you started living in an imaginery world where you are waiting for a knight in white armor, which only gives you temporary relief, but in the long run fuckup you life in reality.”

        That’s true. I always lived in an imaginary world waiting for problems to get fixed by themselves. I had to wake up now, because I’m very late already.

        “And i recommend that you get yourself together, get some professional help and work on your self, and before anything, start living in reality.”

        I like to avoid the reality, because I usually don’t like it. About professional help – I don’t need it – they are all feminists/very liberal and that’s why no one could help me. I also don’t want to tell anyone about my past, except my future husband, of course.

        + I want to apologize for polluting this blog with my personal issues too much and I hope I didn’t appear like an attention whore (I couldn’t post my comments sometimes, but after a while they were published, duplicated).

        Like


      • Damn, how f*cked-up do I have to be in order to be reliably interesting to women so I can have a reliable monogamous relationship and enjoyable sex for the rest of my life without ending-up cuckolded and bankrupt in divorce court?

        Like


    • lol, shittest film ever. Dirty too

      Like


  83. P.S. Don’t take the above comment as an attack, but I’ve been reading this blog for years (I don’t comment that much) and have seen people ripped to shreds for sharing less than you have.

    Like


  84. […] Heartiste – “Potential Rapist Syndrome“, “Women Prefer Dominant Men: You Don’t Say!“, “Cutter Lover” […]

    Like


  85. Funny that you mention it, because the number-one slut in my school is a cutter.

    [Editor: Not surprising that cutters tend to be slutty, but the cutter in this story was comparatively chaste.]

    Like


  86. look at how she looks at him. is that proof that he’s alpha?

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/gavon/the-16-year-old-bride-and-her-51-year-old-husband

    Like


  87. I dated a woman for about six months. I missed the signs that she was cutting (she claimed they were injuries from various accidents). Turned out she’d covered up a significant history of mental illness, and was spiraling into serious drug abuse — all without my realizing it. Any relationship means exposing someone else to potential pain, and wrapping your life up with someone else’s. Where there’s a sign of serious illness (and now I know — lots of “accidental” cuts is such a sign), you’d better be careful: Both you and the girl can get hurt from casual things that wouldn’t be a problem for a more resiliant person.

    Like


  88. What to do if you’re a guy with cut marks? What’s even worse, most of the time I cut myself was because of some girl.

    I’ve changed now but the marks won’t go away. Can I ever wear short sleeves or is it a massive DLV? I’m thinking of getting tattoos but sleeves are often ugly as hell. Still better than cuts though…

    Like


    • Well, men can always say they got cut in a fight or doing something dangerous. Tatoos don’t have to cover up the whole thing, just enough to alter whether the cutting was obvious looking, too. (I understand you don’t want to do the whole arm tatoo and end up looking like a low-rent male pornstar who bounces for a day job.) Getting cosmetic surgery on that area could help, even if it’s just f*cking the area up so it looks like you got torn up from getting grazed by a .50cal round during a firefight or something (although “multilation” may stop some from not trying to return it to pre-cutting untouched) and there’s always the story to go-with like this scene from Jaws…

      Like


  89. Off-topic, but I’m sure someone will want to see…

    “Sex is a Turn Off for Girl Gamers,” The Sun (UK), 14 Jul 2011
    http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3695832/Sex-is-a-turn-off-for-girl-gamers.html

    So, for all y’all who were diggin’ Tron Girl… sorry. Cruising those Elfquest and World of Warcraft conventions (even though computer girls tend to be higher-T) may not be as hot as you think.

    Like


    • From my (somewhat limited) experience, girl gamers are all dykes, fatties or ugly feminazis whose sex life consist mostly of masturbating with their PSWii controller.

      Like


      • Your experience is limited indeed, there’s quite a few cute chicks that are gamers. But yeah, you won’t find girls with the figure of a Victoria’s Secret model in that niche.

        Like


  90. If you want to know what a feminized culture looks like, look no further than the comments on this thread.

    On the one hand you have the White Women of the West whining at length about how much they have “suffered,” and how men, “sociopaths” that they are, must duly repent and rehearse the sacred ceremony of “empathy” if they expect a moment’s attention from these same heroically enduring females.

    On the other slimy hand, you have moralizing manginas insisting that every one of these stupid, prattling, cowardly and characterless whores is, in fact, a sacred temple, a cutter with a soul of gold, and she requires us to do our duty as men, “man up,” join the Marines, and who knows what other rituals of beta self-abnegation. Because these girls are, like, really hurting?

    And if one reasonably suggests that some of these loony slatterns make amiable enough fuck-toys, as long as they don’t know your home address, more hysterical females and preening male moralizers are here to add their bleating bit of shaming language to the stew.

    A disgusting spectacle.

    Like


  91. BOYCOTT AMERICAN WOMEN
    Why American men should boycott American women

    http://boycottamericanwomen.blogspot.com

    I am an American man, and I have decided to boycott American women. In a nutshell, American women are the most likely to cheat on you, to divorce you, to get fat, to steal half of your money in the divorce courts, don’t know how to cook or clean, don’t want to have children, etc. Therefore, what intelligent man would want to get involved with American women?

    American women are generally immature, selfish, extremely arrogant and self-centered, mentally unstable, irresponsible, and highly unchaste. The behavior of most American women is utterly disgusting, to say the least.

    This blog is my attempt to explain why I feel American women are inferior to foreign women (non-American women), and why American men should boycott American women, and date/marry only foreign (non-American) women.

    BOYCOTT AMERICAN WOMEN!

    Are you a man who is interested in marrying indian women? Please visit Indian-Wife.com, India’s 1st International Marriage Site:

    http://www.indian-wife.com

    Like


  92. Roissy’s such a great lay that a woman would rather mutilate herself then break-up with him.

    Bravo man. Bravo.

    When society doesn’t impose standards of behavior for a woman to follow, it’s amazing how weak and easily manipulated they become…to the point of self-harm because they are not mentally equipped to think through a solution.

    Like


  93. This deserves your attention Roissy. Women mock the guy who got his penis chopped off.

    Like


  94. I was on a boat with a young lady this weekend, a 20ish friend of a relative. I had met her before, but this time she was wearing a bikini, which accented her moundiferous double-e’s and showed that her blemishless skin extends to the rest of her softly feminine body. I was already attracted to her pretty face with the natural full pink lips and big round eyes, and as she stood and then turned around, I was able to see in full a tattoo that I had only glimpsed parts of on her midriff. It was in the shape of a peace sign, and read “imagine”. Oh, I imagined all right.

    Like


  95. Deep end emo cutter girl. Extremely disturbing.

    Like


  96. I’m not a cutter. I don’t have borderline personality, nor bipolar disorder or depression. I never took Prozac or any other drug. I’ve had some sad moments in life like anybody else, but I overcame them all. I like outdoor sports, music, all in all I am a happy woman..

    Does is mean I suck in bed?

    no, it means you’re lying

    Like


  97. “If the cuts are on her face, I know she’ll be wearing no panties underneath her skirt and will be ready to fuck in an alleyway before we’re even halfway home.”

    My experience exactly.

    Like


  98. Cutters are morally bankrupt sluts, but they are great lays.

    To all the women and manginas defending these crazy hoes, please stop the hypocrisy. They would steal your boyfriend without batting an eyelash. They are completely without empathy and completely self-centered on their own “suffering”, which they use as an excuse for their gutter-level behavior and general trashiness. Some are drama queens. Some are just pathetic feeble girls.

    No amount of love can fix these girls. They are a black hole of positive feelings. The only thing they are good for (and at) is great unleashed sexual passion.

    Like


    • Agreed.

      Like


    • “No amount of love can fix these girls. They are a black hole of positive feelings. The only thing they are good for (and at) is great unleashed sexual passion.”

      Oh no … You think so???
      I think I am feeble and pathetic sometimes, as well as a black hole for positive emotions, but I hope my future boyfriend/husband will love me and that this will help me to feel safe/loved/less lonely/fixed. I hope he won’t think that I’m good only for sexual passion :S I mean, it’s great to hear that self-harming girls are great lay – so my husband will be happy with me, but still I want him to love and respect my personality, too.

      Like


      • I’m sure he will pretend well, like we all do.

        If you need to be fixed, or supported, you’re an emotional children. You’re not really a woman, and you don’t have a personnality, just an annoying vortex of a soul.

        Just copy the porn movies well and don’t stop giving head, or he’ll be gone the next day.

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  99. Here is what i am curious about. No one has truly defined what makes “cutter girls” great lays. Can we get some specifics here. Like do they all do something that the normal girl doesn’t? do they swing from chandelliers? i’m trying to figure out what you all mean by “great lay” when describing these girls.

    Thank you!

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    • On what grounds do you claim to have the right to demand explanation from anyone here?

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      • DEMAND? look if you have a prob with me (which you obviously do), do me a favor and don’t post to me.

        Thank you

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    • How to… they are “keen” during intercourse. Also, they’re “keen” to have one, or more, on a float, on the boat, in the box, under logs, on a train, in the rain.

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    • Only dated one. But she sucked my dick dry and swallowed in mid afternoon while I was watching TV or playing video games. She was a blowjob pro. She could make me cum in 5 minutes if she wanted, whereas most girls can’t do a proper blowjob to save their lives and I have to focus if I want to orgasm.

      She asked me to go harder on her pussy. She would go for hours. She would fuck like the world was about to end every time. She would have me come two or three times. I didn’t do anal with her for fear of AIDS (since she was a cheating whore) so instead I would finger her ass.

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    • Neecy wrote: No one has truly defined what makes “cutter girls” great lays. Can we get some specifics here. … i’m trying to figure out what you all mean by “great lay” when describing these girls.

      For the most part it means the abuse messed with their sex drives and they reverted to the male default. In other words, they fuck like men.

      There is a gay undercurrent to porn, stripping, prostitution, and general sluttiness that few recognize and even fewer speak about. The pimps who propagate this culture are men serving men, porn producers and strip-club managers dressing up damaged, addicted girls in unfeminine ways — skinny, toned, hard caricatures of the female form with exaggerations of what make women physical women (cartoonish fake breasts, collagen injections, preposterous skankwear, makeup laid on with a trowel). The sex is energetic and violent and athletic like two men grappling. Not unrelated, the male performers depilate and wear makeup like women.

      Well-adjusted women are reserved and protective of their scarce resource (eggs). If you’re a dude who likes banging chicks who “swing from chandeliers,” you are attracted to the careless sperm-scattering male sex drive that seeks to sow far and wide. You have same-sex attraction, thinly veiled by the slut’s exaggerated but false “femininity.” What makes a girl a girl was robbed from her long ago.

      See:
      http://takimag.com/article/the_problem_with_hipster_porn/print

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      • so, you’re saying that Roissy in this story perfectly shows that he’s gay ?

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      • I think what he is saying is the way in which men today promote and want sex from women is more physically male identified as opposed to approaching it from a standpoint of wanting a woman to maintain some form of femininity. (hope i am being clear). I correalte this to be true in the ways to which men describe sleeping with women (“beat up her Pu$$y” bang her”). Its like male on male interaction (not in the sense of being gay) but in how men interact or identify themselves (very physically rough). I don’t know if I am expressing this clearly….

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      • You obviously didn’t read it well…
        And he is trying to make a theory based on sporadic and hardly related facts

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      • There is something same-sex attracted in his compulsive need to talk to other men anonymously about sex. He is metrosexual.

        Two caveats. He is clearly not flamingly disordered and craving the cock über alles; it is a minor impulse among many stronger ones. And it’s only a put-down if you find gay sex repulsive, deviant, and inherently evil. Based on earlier posts, he doesn’t seem to.

        More to the point, though. Mine was not a commentary on Roissy. It is an observation about a cultural trend. You made the connection to the author, which is only partially descriptive of the many other more dominant elements to his id.

        If you’re under the age of forty, you might mistake Hefner’s topsy-turvy world for normal, since it’s the world you were born into. Hefner succeeded at inverting gender roles by feminizing men and masculinizing women. First Hefner domesticated men: he took them out of the field and stream and into the living room. Chris Colin of Salon puts it this way:

        The Playboy universe encouraged appreciation of the “finer things”–literature, a good pipe, a cashmere pullover, a beautiful lady. America was seeing the advent of the urban single male who, lest his subversive departure from domestic norms suggest homosexuality, was now enjoying new photos of nude women every month.

        Echoes of this feminization are still heard today in films like Fight Club, where “a generation of men raised by women” wonder why they even know words like “duvet.” Key to this extension of bachelorhood was the need to fend off any suspicion of homosexuality, something Playboy and pornography have had in common since their inception. The supply and demand for pornography, after all, is overwhelmingly from men to men. And pornography assumes (and then demands) of women a sex drive that used to be associated only with men. (Unlike women, the joke goes, men don’t need a reason for sex, they just need a place.) As the porn star Annabel Chong said in Harper’s magazine of her World’s Biggest Gang Bang, “It’s a very homoerotic thing. . . . I’m just there to guarantee the heterosexuality of it all.”

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      • “For the most part it means the abuse messed with their sex drives and they reverted to the male default. In other words, they fuck like men.”
        This is pure BS, how to you got that one???
        they fuck like men…lol

        The cutters are mostly borderlines, the borderline has not always happen to be sexually abused, if they were, they will engage in sex late in life (mostly).
        In most of the cases they are left, emotionally abused, somewhat phisycaly abused.
        So in order to cope with their deeeeeeep fear of abandonment and rejection,
        they try to hook you in at the start, they engage in very passionate and “good” sex, by either acting it all out or by being naturals.
        After some time, they show their true side and they get freaky…

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      • First of all, do you agree that most porn, stripping, and prostitution comes almost directly out of sexual abuse? Second, do you think they are connected?

        Cutting/bipolar disorder is not always a sign of sexual abuse, no. But other than (possibly) genetic inheritance, what is the greater cause of it in women?

        Women are not like men. That is one of the deep truths of this blog. One of the ways women are not like men is their sex drive. Yes, we can agree they want sex more than is politely acknowledged, but that semi-fictitious demurring has a cultural purpose. If you want to go strictly biological, the “expensive” egg is not going to be as naturally driven to be promiscuous as “cheap” sperm, outnumbering the female gamete billions to one over a lifetime.

        The impulse control, biological imperative, and cultural conditioning of femininity requires women don’t open their hole to every spitting phallus to play sperm gutter. Sexually abused women have been reprogrammed to defensively detach themselves from the long-term consequences of sex which shape their development into a functioning female (motherhood and genetic transfer). Men are already detached in that way because the effect of sex is much less consequential to their long-term destiny.

        Promiscuous men are studs, promiscuous women are sluts. A billion Slutwalks will not erase the shame of treating a womb like a spitoon — there are cultural reasons for it, which are based on biological imperatives. If a girl is fucking like a guy — that is to say, easily and energetically and inexorably and incessantly — something somewhere went way wrong.

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      • King A,

        Very interesting breakdown. And I was trying to connect the dots as to why these damaged or mentally fragile women are all so good in bed and what it is they’re doing to make them stand out from a normal girl. A lot of what you say makes sense.

        It seems American women in general believe being promiscuous is empowering. Put that message along with any other issues a young woman may be experincing and I can see the connection. This culture we live in not only promotes sex, but as you said promotes it in a very male physical way (i.e. “beat up her pu$$y” “bang her”) etc. Those terms fall in line with what you are saying here.

        Good post!

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  100. UH OH since we’re on the topic of women on the edge and avoiding such, you guys won’t like this. new law may pass in UK giving women full right to view criminal and background history of men they date.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2015564/Clares-law-After-mothers-brutal-murder-women-right-check-abusive-partners-criminal-records.html#ixzz1SJRjgzic

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    • Oddly, many women fall in love with criminals. Go figure out.

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    • I reserve the right to check a bitch’s background to see if she cut off her boyfriend’s penis!

      Fucking women are getting NASTY these days!

      Yo!

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  101. I am amused at how much girls love Roissy’s blog. Neecy, I recall, said she would be leaving last week, and that posting here was just a means of passing time while she was ill and bed-ridden. I suspect she has a dearth of real men in her life.

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    • You’re right! (about the men). But I will be returning back to work wednesday (out for sometime) so I won’t have as much time on my hands.

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  102. Are you actively trying to change your ‘men problem’? Visiting bars and clubs? Singles events?

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    • The problem is the “kinds” of men. I go to a lot of small venue shows with local bands (reggae and metal) and while I enjoy those events, the guys there are usually very young (not complaining) but moreso looking for hook-ups and not the kinds I would consider for LTR.

      I hate the bar scene b/c I don’t really drink. I HAAAAATE clubs. Online dating is annoying so far.

      I’ve been pretty lazy about my search I need to step it up.

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      • You don’t drink? That makes things exponentially harder.

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      • I will “attempt” one drink but never finish it. I just haven’t acquired a taste for liquor – put it like this I’m the 1% of the population that tells the bartender when I order a mixed drink “easy on the liquor” lol

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      • You sound like a painfully boring girl.

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      • on July 18, 2011 at 4:03 pm Ricardo di Matteo

        I have a friend who is an ex marine and does not frequent bars / clubs as he doesn’t like drinking. He has had success with online dating – by having a bunch of pictures of himself in cool places around the world doing cool stuff (he does travel a lot for both work and leisure), which creates talking points for getting messages. If you don’t ‘do’ bars/clubs – you need to do something else.

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      • LOL Killer! Tell me how you *really* feel! Hmm. Boring as one who doesn’t drink much (not b/c i don’t want to but b/c i don’t like how liquor tastes) or participate in casual sex or hang out in clubs and bars? It all really depends on what one calls “exciting” . I like excitement and have a fun loving personality, but i can be pretty conservative and traditional when it comes to sex or hooking up. I just can’t do it – too many nasty diseases and stuff floating around to just have sex with a stranger. Not to mention the emotional toll sleeping around takes on women. Once the oxytocin releases, we’re screwed! BUT, If things don’t improve in the next couple years, I will just say “eff it” & simply understand LTR may not be in the cards, and I’ll just live life, travel and have an occasional hook up (when I need a fix) with a youngin (I still look 10 years younger than I am). *shrugs* Not there yet, don’t wanna have to but at some point I will just be happy with that. I think this is the way many women who aren’t getting married are going. Since men don’t have to (nor want to) settle down nowadays.

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      • on July 18, 2011 at 4:00 pm Ricardo di Matteo

        Best advice to people who don’t like the club/bar scene (male and female) is to do something that widens your social circle. Join a sports club, a book club, evening classes, dancing lessons, whatever. You meet new friends – meet friends of their friends and it gives more opportunities. Not exactly rocket science…

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      • You’d think i would have got this by now eh? That is why i say I have been pretty lazy on my search and I need to step it up.

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      • My educated guess: she wants a good man of color. College would’ve been the best bet to plant the seeds of an LTR.

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      • No on the man of color. I don’t really see Black men any different than I see other men. IOW’s I don’t feel any special connections to Black men in general no more than I do other races of men.

        What you say about college is true. However, many young Black women are often told to “hit the books” in college and “not focus on men” b/c the possibility is once most Black men become successful, they marry out thier race. And so, we do that – hit the books, focus on our careers and before you know it we have missed opportunities to find LTR’s.

        Not to mention, most college age Black men or just Black men in general, worship the “player” lifestyle and are only interested in making Out of Wedlock babies with a bunch of women. If you are a Black girl in college who refuses to “put out” at the drop of a dime, you are screwed and i don’t mean that literally. lol

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      • Ouch. As a man of color, I think I may be offended by that description.

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      • If you don’t fit the description, no need to be offended 🙂 I didn’t say there weren’t good men of color, but the ones who are usually cross over.

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      • Define LTR.
        My definition of a LTR is about 12 hours.

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      • Please tell me these you are giving these women breaks in bewteen those 12 hrs? 😉

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      • LOL.

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  103. Matt, marry me? 🙂 No, I really hope I’ll be able to find someone who thinks like you do. My sister told me a few days ago that I have a possibility of 1:10 000 to find a man who still believes in traditional marriage. She’s wrong, obviously, but there are still not many men like that … Or they will become like that, but only after maybe 10 years, when for us girls iwill be too late.

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  104. Roissy.

    I have not ever met a “cutter-lover” The closest that I can relate to, is a stripper that I met at a strip-club in London. She was the only American there. Her twang was a thing of utter fascination for me. She was a small ash-blonde with a set of uneven teeth. And she was very self-conscious when she smiled.

    I struck up a conversation with her, and in the calculated inanities that is a conversation in a strip-club, I said something that hurt her. It wasn’t my intention. She was almost in tears. Somehow I managed to salvage the situation, and she regained her composure. We talked further. I didn’t have listen a lot to deduce that here was someone from a broken home, trying to earn her way in the only type of home she knew.

    And then we drifted apart. Later she did a lesbian dance with another stripper for my fat friend. He was enjoying himself tremendously. But this ash-blonde was more concerned with her technique … a rythmic movement between professionalism, disgust, desperation and ennui … and always self-conscious.

    I had to leave then. And as I walked by she looked at me. I have no words to describe it. I could only look back and smile. And I couldn’t talk. Then she might have lost her customer.

    But I sometimes wonder what would have happened had I talked to her then. And as I sit here pondering this, only two emotions are felt : relief … and guilt …

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  105. “We were laying down side by side on her bed mid-afternoon.” -Should be “lying.”

    “As we lied on the bed staring at the ceiling…”
    -Should be “lay.”

    I think.. English profs correct me if I’m wrong.

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    • I’m an English prof 🙂 The first one is correct. (‘lying’ would mean they were already on the bed, wouldn’t it?), the second should be ‘lay’, I checked the dictionary.

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  106. You are right
    *Pat on the back*

    But i think it should be :
    “It was mid-afternoon. We were lying side by side.”
    and
    “As we lay on the bed, the ceiling started to stare at us. I wondered if the mushrooms are starting to work”
    😀

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