When A Shit Test Isn’t A Shit Test

Not every insult (veiled or blatant), punchy challenge, or arch criticism by a woman is a shit test as the term is commonly understood — a subconsciously guided female examination of a man’s grace under pressure that helps her assess his alphaness. There are other reasons a woman might be critical of a man she is dating or evaluating as a suitor.

I have observed that there are two alternate explanations for bitchy behavior that men will encounter most often in the course of their love lives.

1. She is genuinely repulsed by a man’s betaness.

When a girl is sincerely and uncompromisingly put off by cloying or socially clumsy beta male behavior, she will sometimes be unable to stifle the disgust she feels and her animus will come spilling out in icy cold body language, nagging, scolding and nit-picking. This is predominantly the behavior of the bitch in betrothed bondage to the beta male, who has grown tired, or become unsettlingly aware, of her hubby’s unsexy weakness. The beta husband who finds his time with his wife increasingly characterized by seemingly irrational wifely outbursts of anger, incessant nagging about inconsequential misdemeanors, passive-aggressive sex withdrawal and assorted glib jabs and cruel mannerisms that show a disrespect for his presumed status and masculine prerogative, is experiencing the foul ministrations of a woman in thrall to her slow boil of hate for male enfeeblement. This phenomenon is easily substitutable for men and women in unmarried long-term relationships.

Men, beware. This is no shit test. It is your most immediate warning sign that your lover is about to leave you, or, worse, cheat on you. She has no interest in sussing out your manliness; she is only a fist of rage semi-incoherntly lashing out at you for making her feel unfeminine. Treating her behavior like an extended shit test may actually backfire if you haven’t prepped her for your transformation to a man willing to display his balls.

Note that this supremely bitchy behavior may occasionally manifest early in the courtship dance, usually by women with low impulse control and looks in the 4-7 range; the kind of women who get hit on a lot by “creepy” men thinking they have a chance, and who have reached their tolerance threshold for such brazen men. If flecks of spittle fly as she castigates you, or she is simultaneously backing away while hurling her insults at your face, or her entire body curls up into a phantom turtle shell at the mere exposure of her personal space to your entreaties, you are likely dealing with sincere loathing and not a shit test to be aced for further sexual exploration.

2. She is afraid of losing her man.

A girl who adores her boyfriend will, at times, and especially during those moments when his appeal to competitor women is most discernible, act in ways that strike normal, logical men as strange. Instead of anointing with flattery and devotionals, the anxious woman with commitment extraction on her mind may respond with what she perceives as self-esteem lowering cuts to some or another flaw of her boyfriend’s.

The flaws she highlights will almost always be of a physical nature, or a treatise on his style. “You’re getting pudgy.” “I never noticed before how gross your toes are.” “You look like you haven’t slept in a week.” “You’re too pale.” “You walk funny.” “That shirt makes you look like a doofus.”

Charming, eh? Ah, but she will hardly be able to announce these flaws with the expected contempt; often her critique will be leavened with a revealing brightness in the eyes and sensuously accessible body language. An experienced man will rapidly know her bitchiness comes from a place of insecurity about her standing with him. He will know, as true as the sun rises in the east, that women simply don’t put very much emphasis on a man’s looks in comparison to the other attractiveness traits that women desire in men. And that this truism goes double for a woman in love, for whom her man’s looks are a paltry secondary consideration to his wit, leadership, humor, kindness, cockiness, thoughtfulness, edginess and sexual prowess. And so her criticisms of his physical state or fashion sense will trickle harmlessly off his ego like water off a duck’s back, understood as they are as the bleatings of a desperate lover engaged in a mini power play.

The woman chooses the physical and the stylistic for her barbs because she is projecting her very real female horror at coming up short in these two areas critical to her own SMV onto her man, for whom she mistakenly believes pokes at his physical attributes will have the same effect on him as it would on her; namely, the effect of luring him more deeply into an approval-seeking mode of thought and, thus, a stronger commitment from him that she much desires. This type of subversive badinage is actually a form of bonding for the woman. Unlike insults directed at a man’s status for which there is no turning back, the nature of petty jabs at his looks or his choice of clothes brings a woman closer to her man; she is complicit in his reformulation to something “better”, i.e. domesticated.

Men, be gladdened. If you hear your girlfriend or wife criticizing you in this manner, you are confirmed to be sitting pretty in the driver’s seat of the relationship. You have hand. She wants what only you have to give: increased commitment. And she wants it as badly as you wanted her sex when the two of you started dating.

You may play it off like a shit test, replying in knowing condescension or, even funnier, feigned concern. E.g., “Yes, I really ought to get right on that fixing my troll toes. I’ll schedule an amputation tomorrow.” But be warned: the nature of this type of criticism is not usually that of the shit test. She is not interested in deducing your alphaness; she already knows about that, and anyhow her jabs are of a different nature when it is playful shit testing that motivates her.

No, she wants to hurt you just a little bit — to make you just insecure enough, really, to inspire you to ingratiate yourself to her needs without turning you away completely or unintentionally pushing you to desperate, servile betatude — and pointed, spiteful criticism of your physical flaws (that she thinks ought to matter to her, and to you, but really don’t) is how she gets at you. She knows you’re confident to volley her verbal airstrikes. If you begin hearing a lot of this sort of criticism from her, it means flirty parrying is not what she seeks; she wants your ultimate capitulation.

…every kiss begins with three months’ salary


  1. Or we could just pump and dump.


  2. That’s some Hannibal Lecter shit right there.


  3. Is the blogger aware of the murder that just happened in Murietta, California of Saskia Burke, the beautiful 18 year old daughter of a liberal male who took a black teenage male into his home two years ago who was from a dysfunctional home? It turned out that Mr. Bleeding Heart, who had done this via some kind of volunteer program, woke up about a year ago when he realized that the young man wanted to have sex with his daughter and asked him to leave. One year later, and presumably after a lot of stalking, the young black man returned and just conducted the triple stabbing of her (leaving her dead) and her father and boyfriend. There’s a massive manhunt going on now.


    • the killer looks like Bruce Leroy from TUF. fucker.


    • Fuck. and I bet Thwack will say something stupid about how the girl wanted it because blacks r like totalyl big down there and shit, cause thugzzz be alphazzz.

      At least the killer didn’t go Christian Newsome on the family. Cause that’s thug-alpha, yo.


    • it wasn’t the black guy’s fault. he was just a victim of years of oppression by the white heteropatriarchy.

      wake up white man.


    • Well, this is the danger when low-status men are daily exposed to women out of their league. We truly live in a ridiculous society..


      • I know, right? These guys have high-T so they can be blinded by lust into impregnating their leviathan sized women folk, so imagine how that lust explodez their brainzzz, thug stylezzz playa, around attractive women.


    • Did he rape her first? If not, what a shame!


    • Ermm, I Googled this girl and her Myspace account is called “slutzkia”. I wouldn’t speak ill of a murder victim, but it doesn’t sound like her parents were too aware of whatever was going on there.


    • on December 21, 2011 at 10:37 pm Obstinance Works

      Heh. Shit happens.


    • Negros can be violent when the don’t get what they want.




  5. on December 21, 2011 at 6:03 pm Anon1 fighting the shite test

    And is the best M.O. if you find yourself in a marriage or LTR and being subjected to the shit tests?

    Obviously grow some balls but do it immediately and overtly and say you’re not gonna take it or wait for the shit test, don’t say it overtly, and do a 180? I tend to think the latter since she would be in shit test mode and the Hamster would run more than in a “normal” mode.


    • on December 21, 2011 at 6:05 pm Anon1 fighting the shite test

      actually I should change the above from “shit test” since the original story says it ain’t no shit test.

      Still the question is what to do that’s most effective?


    • Depends what you mean by “grow some balls”. The behavior Heartiste describes is a rejection, not a shit test. Trying to assert yourself in the face of a rejection will make the woman detest you even more, or worse, become creeped out.

      The correct way to counter a rejection is to walk away, immediately, without comment or complaint. If this is done, it *might* build attraction – especially if you stay away for a prolonged amount of time.


      • on December 22, 2011 at 7:41 am Anon1 fighting the shite test

        Yah, I’m thinkin ’bout this right now. In a LTR and she says it’s over but hasn’t done anything concrete yet, changes her mind every 2 weeks. Been reading Heartiste and you all and been trying to play it but sometimes you slip up. Am thinking that really walking away as you say (or be willing to) is the only way but wouldn’t mind throwing in some Jealousy game to make her pay for what she is putting me thru.
        How to game her back and then dump her, that is the Game topic of the day.


      • Agreed. If your LTR is treating you like this, wtf are you thinking? Dump her. If married, divorce her. The stakes are higher when you have kids. If you want to stay in the marriage, you have to reject her totally.

        Total rejection. If you have one-itis, I don’t think you can pull this off. You cannot be bitter or angry. Treat her as if nothing is wrong, but live as separately as you can while being in the same house. Make yourself scarce in your job, in your hobbies, and start hitting the gym. Ignore her completely. Don’t fuck her, don’t even touch her. Talk to her as little as possible. Maintain your household impeccably, but act as if she is unimportant to you. Don’t do her any favors. When she asks, flatly tell her no. If she bitches or starts railing on you, put her in her place with one statement and walk away. Over time, the silent treatment should put an end to the bitching.

        If she wants to talk about what is going on with you, don’t take the bait, maintain that nothing’s wrong. This is very important: do not verbalize anything; do not discuss your relationship. This strategy is basically to remove all the beta and replace it with alpha. You should be practicing aloof, amused mastery 100% of the time, you should be working on your inner game, becoming alpha. Keep this up until she sweetens towards you. It might take a long time. For me it was 4 months. Then pick a night during her ovulation phase, put on your devilish grin, and tell her you are going to fuck her. She might offer token resistance, ignore it. Give her the most alpha horse-fucking she’s ever had. Wake up next to a happier wife. Congratulations, you now have hand. Never go back to your beta ways, maintain the amused mastery and adhere to the golden ratio.

        This is basically my extreme version of ch’s five point plan for saving a faltering marriage. His forth point is to cheat on her. That one is up to you, but I will warn you: sex with other women will be 10x hotter than with your wife, and you might not want to stop cheating and ‘go back to your wife.’ It is much easier to get hot, wet, new pussy than to warm up a cold one.


      • on December 22, 2011 at 3:08 pm Anon1 fighting the shite test

        Great advice but there are kids involved. I am just wondering, doing the disappearing stuff and not telling her where I’m going if the Jealousy Hamster might work faster without copping to it.

        There musta been a couple of clues in your story when the 4 month time hit and you knew it would work to fuck her. Not knocking ya, but you couldn’t have pulled that off at the start?


      • Let her know where you are, don’t betray her trust. You aren’t disappearing mysteriously, you are just very busy. Continue to give the kids your full attention, but don’t give her any. Don’t behave badly, behave normally. My goal was to marginalize her in my life and make her feel it, not to make her think I was cheating. Put the the kids to bed and head to the gym every night. It is very important to not be angry or bitter and not do anything unusual. You have to be subtle like a woman, beat her at her own game of covert communication. “I am taking the kids out for pizza tonight, you are welcome to join us.” Then I would only talk to her if she engaged me. Don’t exclude her, marginalize her.

        I’m not saying this is how to treat a woman. This was my way to reset the relationship. This is a takeaway strategy when your wife has become a total bitch. However, for it to be successful, you first have to understand what you were doing that made her turn into a bitch. You’ve got to fix that during the reset period. You have to eradicate your beta ways and be more alpha. You also have to have enough value that she knows she is better off with you than without you.

        Yeah, I could have continued fucking her, but it was very important to take away the power of the pussy from her. I needed to negate her power and assert my own – to get “hand.” I needed to show her that I didn’t need her for sex or anything else. I wanted to make her feel powerless to control or influence me, completely marginalized, almost worthless. It took 4 months for her attitude towards me to change, and I wasn’t going to touch her again until it did. My affection and my cock are not given freely, they are given as a reward for her good behavior.


      • on December 23, 2011 at 5:28 pm Anon1 fighting the shite test

        This is great stuff but with a few twists. She loves the kids and would jump in to anything we did. She’s not always a total bitch, she will switch it on and off. Game is helping me with the bitchiness. What is fucking me up is her niceness then I think things have really changed but she is still talking about splitting up. If I had to lay odds it would be that she thinks I’m okay with it (I can’t help it, I just know it will devastate the kids) so she’s getting what she wants. I am thinking of telling her we should trial separate and have her take out the garbage and cut the grass, all stuff she’d have to do if I leave. Though I”d still be in the house and take care of the kids.

        It’s hard to really know, to be honest about it, how to behave “normally”, it’s been a long time of this crap. She thinks we can separate happily enough. I am wondering if I should just take King A’s advice and reject the rejection, just cave in, or play for time and see if ultra Game kicks in. I do need the ‘tang something awful and I don’t think I’ve slipped up on hinting at that. I just
        have said a sexless marriage can’t continue and left it at that. Just trying to read Heartiste and Athol and put it all together.

        Funny thing, parts of me are obviously more alpha, just got a promotion at work and I’m swinging a pretty good stick there. Weird that that part of it is still happening like it was when I was a cubicle monkey. I got that part earlier, can’t really figure why it ramped up recently. Then I come home even more tired with more responsibility, only really enough energy to put the kids to bed and read CH. I’m not the sole breadwinner, I’ve just pulled ahead of her by a little and used to make a bit less.


      • Anonymous wrote: “Trying to assert yourself in the face of a rejection will make the woman detest you even more, or worse, become creeped out.”

        Wha? Depends on the quality of the assertion. You students are absorbing the wrong lesson, you are still beta in your bones. You could use a marrow transfusion.

        What is the alternative to “assert[ing] yourself in the face of a rejection”? Slinking away “in the face of a rejection”? A man always asserts himself. What makes a beta-omega assertion “creep[y]” is the way its overreaction reveals his confidence to have been a false pose.

        PUAs call manly assertion “frame control.” By not pushing back after a rejection, you are passive to her frame. That’s always a no-no, even in failure. Don’t be lame, maintain your frame with a dame (channeling Jesse Jackson/Dr. Seuss lately). You recover your dignity from a potentially mortal blow and live to game another day.

        Bad, bad, bad. Gaming is not stalking. Sully’s way too committed to her frame, way too eager. But still better than the slink-away. And hilarious.

        Rejection is not failure, it’s a spice in the recipe. Too many rejections and it can ruin the cake like too much cinnamon or whatever (creeper/stalker syndrome). And yet, what coward is deterred by his first setback? Who scrutinizes a broad’s psychology to figure out the genuineness of her rejection? Supplicating betas, that’s who. Do not distinguish between shit tests. All shit tests are conditional rejections, contingent on the response. Ninety percent of them are deflected by amusement, the kind of amusement that calls attention to the obviousness of her ruse on a man like you. But it all depends on what “a man like you” truly means beyond your bullshit and trickery.

        It’s true, the creepy omega and world-beating alpha share a vision: that all women should defer to him. It’s like going so far East into the Omega Orient that it becomes the Alpha Occident. There is a fine line between confidence and delusion. Your mode of thinking (“a rejection, not a shit test”) wants to stay in the safe middle where you can be relatively successful with average-to-above-average scores. That’s fine, but that’s hardly all there is.

        Which is why the deception of game has serious limits. You can fake it till you make it … but eventually, make it. You need some serious accomplishment to indemnify your “assertions” and your attitude. In the end, the confidence that rises above game is what separates you from the pack.


      • I don’t know, I just disagree with you. If you are rejected, I think the only way you can possibly revive the attraction is just to walk away.


      • Accepting rejection is the mark of the hangdog beta. Ignoring it is the mark of the alpha … and the omega. The reason why you ignore it, and the method with which you ignore it, are what distinguish the alpha’s reaction from the omega’s.

        In the alpha’s case, her rejection is by definition temporary, defensive, ill-informed, false, and probably all of the above.

        In the omega’s case, her rejection is permanent, perceptive, reflexive, instinctual, and true.

        Success doesn’t depend on her unguided assessment (which is bound up in too many female psychodramas to be of any relevance) so much as it depends on what kind of man you really are, whether she can ascertain your essence immediately or not. Which category of ignored rejection do you fall under? The alpha brand or omega brand? More important, which category are you broadcasting to the world?

        One matter that is beyond dispute: the lukewarm beta play is to flee any scene where he perceives he is not wanted, and the insecurities and paranoia that define beta will always tell him that he is not wanted. That is the tragedy a man invites when he “just … walk[s] away.” She doesn’t intuit the beta defeat in the act of his retreating. She already smelled the defeatism that makes a chump prone to retreat, always halfway out the door, never committed because he’s afraid of failure, whether he physically skedaddles or not. The unsubtle female hindbrain doesn’t process any of this, it just spits out one word to define her ill-at-ease: “creepy.” A woman’s instincts are precise; her interpretation of them into social action are contingent and retarded. In any event, manly frame, not womanly judgment, is what determines whether a girl’s disapproval ultimately ends its journey as shit test or rejection. It’s more on you than it is on her.

        I’m not saying you redefine your fuck-ups to be winning moves for the sake of bravado. I’m saying the reasons why you “walk away,” and the style of your exeunt, are crucial. Rejections are setbacks, not final answers. More often than not it will send “the man with options” onto the next bird, but this issue strikes at the heart of a man’s dignity, of which it is crucial for him to retain full possession.

        Regard a woman’s judgment — even her judgment about you — as you would a child’s. You’ll go places.


      • Damn.

        This might be the first time I’ve ever agreed with King A and it’s because he hit the ball out of the park this time.

        He’s correct here. No doesn’t necessarily mean No when a man can make his case and turn a woman around by being assertive.

        Of course, he didn’t use a case study from his own life here as usual, but he intuitively gets it.

        I’ve had girls say about going on a date “You’ve got to be kidding, you look like my dad” and, if I get all meek and sad and say “Gee, I didn’t know I look old” they will only disrespect me more. If I behave like the pastor in Pride and Prejudice, I’m also sunk. However, if I look surprised and change the frame to one where I politely let her know that she’ll look like her mom within 10 years, her insecurities can be unleashed and we’ll be on that date in no time.


      • “I’ve had girls say about going on a date “You’ve got to be kidding, you look like my dad””

        “Then your dad must be a fucking stud.”

        Creepy or cocky?


      • I feel bad for Sully, he should have been killed last. alpha!


    • Perhaps those in my circle are just not as natural at it as our host, but if you’re already in an LTR, the whole cocky-funny-always-get-the-last-word routine seems to get stale pretty quickly. I fact, in my experience, it is one of THE most common reasons for why alphas successful at the short game, tend to end up in horrible LTRs.

      The simple fact that the broad notices your “bad” looks, is indication that the reality distortion field of your alphaness is wearing thin. Besides, unless you live for the chance of making cocky-witty banter, why bother with someone needing a constant flood of it, even in the long term?

      Instead, if what she says in irrelevant drivel, just overhear it, like yo learn to do with the neighbor’s yap trash. Let her push on a string until she either tires of it, or bolts for someone more receptive to nonsensical nagging.

      Or, honestly, get her pregnant, to give her something more meaningful to obsess about. The entire purpose of LTRs are procreative, anyway; and id she ain’t worth having kids with, she ain’t worth spending ones life with. Women were designed to be knocked up at 15, and to be kept in a state of knockedupness until 40. Most, if not all, of the irrational femnonsense people whine about on this blog, is due to current circumstances conspiring to keep them out of this state of bliss.


      • Stuki wrote: “… the whole cocky-funny-always-get-the-last-word routine seems to get stale pretty quickly.”

        If it’s just a “routine,” you’re doing it wrong.

        Maybe you’re “not as natural at it as our host,” but you should strive to be. It’s not about mimicking someone’s appearance. It’s about transforming your nature. Even “our host” has admitted he wasn’t a natural from birth. He learned early, when his behavior was most susceptible to influence, from a mentor whose example set him on the trajectory to transformation.

        By characterizing “amused mastery” as “cocky-funny-always-get-the-last-word” you are revealing your misunderstanding of the attitude. “Always get the last word” is the mark of an insecure child or omega. You command with your ethos, with your presence, you preach the Gospel and use words only when necessary. Cocky-funny can quickly devolve into goofy-tryhard if your frame is lacking.

        Stop thinking of these prescriptions as a magic act or a stand-up bit. They are a mode of life. A man is in command, and people want to be led, especially especially women, whose very identities are lost in the absence of manly leadership. Does that leadership manifest itself as “cocky-funny”? Sometimes. Does it take a form of aggression or physicality? Often. Does it require silence? On occasion. But all of these outward techniques can be applied to an omega frame too. So get to the place where you can focus on essence rather than window dressing, even though the window dressing is adequate to get you laid by the 0 to 6 crowd, with occasional forays beyond.


  6. #1 should be pretty obvious to anyone who isn’t a super-autistic who’s brain has been fucked over by bad PUA advice.


    • on December 21, 2011 at 10:35 pm Obstinance Works

      Whatever do you mean by that mr. shithead?


    • Unfortunately socially inept guys generally haven’t socialized enough to learn to tell when they’re creeping girls out…and those are the guys that are drawn to PUA.

      Recipe for disaster right there.

      When you go out enough, and actually break down and analyze what you’re doing, you learn social calibration and you can tell a legit creeped out “fuck off” from a shit-testing “fuck off” from a flirting “fuck off”

      This is a big part of why PUAs were encouraged to write Field Reports back when the community was more underground…fellow PUAs would analyze the reports and point things out like “I dunno man, this usually doesn’t get that reaction…what you’re saying is fine so check your tone or body language.” or “ya I used to get that reaction a bunch, once I started dressing a little better I found girls were a lot more receptive, you said you went out in a t-shirt, try throwing on a blazer and see if the dressy girls you keep hitting on react the same way”

      These guys are also a big part of what gives PUAs a bad name and makes non-PUAs think game “doesn’t work”, ’cause they stand out as just socially retarded and you can tell they’re running game because they’re using routines right out of the book.

      A really good PUA is basically invisible, if you met him you’d just think you met a cool alpha guy that’s good with girls.


      • QFT.

        In the last 3 years, going out to busy bars has been tedious BECAUSE of so many PUA newbs trying the same aged and outdated Neil Straussian gimmicks. Even worse, every newb I run into tries to be AMOG without having the confidence and ability in truth. False AMOGing comes off as comical.

        Of course, when they penetrate my space and launch themselves at whatever gal I happen to be with, just calling them Bozo and making fun of their antics pretty much relieves them of any ability to AMOG the crowd that’s with me.

        At least they’re trying. In my 20s, most of the guys acted like the guys do in Portland: sheepish, manipulative, nice-guy-itis.


      • Yareally and Heartiste are making a false distinction between “shit-testing ‘fuck off'” and “a flirting ‘fuck off.'” A shit test that comes out of the “repulsi[on]” toward “a man’s betaness” is still a shit test, it’s just one that the beta routinely fails, thereby confirming her repulsion (rather than, as doth the PUA, turning her expectations on their head).

        The shit test is thrown at everyone — alpha, beta, omega alike — who accidentally or intentionally strays into an entitled girl’s princess bubble. What distinguishes a man’s status among the three groups is how he responds to the same exact challenge.

        This idea that women distinguish their shit tests between flirtatious and fuck-off-tious is a red herring. You give the female psychological process too much credit. The poo-poo exam is like a sonar pulse she sends out indiscriminately in every direction; the omegas remain invisible by their weak ping-back, the betas visible but non-threatening background, and the alphas a direct and fast-closing bogey. “Con, Weps. Tingles will be ready to launch in 4 minutes.”

        Now, she may follow up with more and heavier tests to the test-passer who intrigues her by his passing, if only to challenge him to demonstrate his still greater worth. Successfully neutralizing the first fecal sortie shifts her mode and it’s game on. But even then, the subsequent tests are not so much “flirtatious” or coy or ironic as they are provocatively defensive, as if to say, “I’m really hope this one works on him, because I’m running out of poopie pellets.” Stripped bare, her submission can then proceed.



      • You articulated this much better than I could have today. I was reminded of the Tom Brady SNL harassment skit when I read the original post.

        Basically the modern professional woman’s shit test is “don’t be sexual with me at work”. Being that that this shit test is unspoken, and non directed it is impossible for the test to send the specific message of “fuck off” or “flirt”. Thus it’s both. So there is no distinction to be made, because there is no distinction… just as you surmised.

        Repulsion/arousal are more a result of the shit test than the shit test is a result of repulsion/arousal.


      • I want to live inside your head for like, 10 minutes. I bet it would be amazing.


      • We’re just talking a step ahead of the initial shit-test you’re talking about, is all. The initial one is neutral, sure, but if you bomb that one (and maybe a few more) there comes a point where the tests after that lock into a mode where she’s trying to escape your creepiness or a mode where none of her objections matter because she secretly wants you.


      • “These guys are also a big part of what gives PUAs a bad name and makes non-PUAs think game “doesn’t work”, ’cause they stand out as just socially retarded and you can tell they’re running game because they’re using routines right out of the book.”

        Ya, are you by any chance familiar with this site:


        Novy seems a little hot under the collar. Hot under the collar as in, “he doth protest too much.”


      • on December 22, 2011 at 7:34 pm Obstinance Works

        That dude says he hates game, but he uses it, calling it something else I don’t know what, and even posts studies on flirting and such that supports the premise of Game. He’s just an attention-whoring blowhard fag trying to bilk the omega hate.


      • on December 23, 2011 at 4:38 pm Obstinance Works

        It’s still better than standing in shadows crying in one’s piss. AMOG conflicts teach us not to take other’s BS so seriously. PUA Win!


      • on December 23, 2011 at 4:44 pm Obstinance Works

        I really dont try to amog newbies. Im for the cause. Its better to make friends and have more on yur team. Yur dumb floozies arnt worth putting down dudes who are trying to make it. Merry Christmas douchebags and pricks. God bless you every one.


  7. Generally, when a girl is genuinely turned off she will first subdue her reactions. Think lack of eye contact, lack of follow-up comments to your own comments, her body hunched over, and obsessively-nervously twirling her hair.

    But if a man misinterprets this passive behavior as being a shit test, and pushes ahead with what he believes is a seduction… that’s when the spite begins. If the man and woman haven’t actually slept together yet, the woman will crassly and brutally tell the man what a loser he is. It frightens a woman at a deep level when a low-status man considers himself in her league, and she will typically overreact. If its a husband who won’t take a hint, then she won’t be as direct and abrupt, but rather try to wear him down with longterm nagging, sarcasm, and icy coldness.

    You have to remember that women think men think like they do, or think that men should be forced to think like they do. They subsequently have little sympathy or mercy towards a man who can’t “vibe” that she’s not interested, and will pull no punches.


    • if she calls you a loser, walk away. this is the male equivalent to calling a female ugly. this has been covered. that is not a shit test in a majority of situations. only the highly socialized would be able to discern the difference between shit test loser and disgust loser


  8. “…every kiss begins with three months’ salary”

    That’s a play on “Every kiss begins with Kay.” Which is the epitome of ass backwards anti-game thinking. If you have to buy her jewelry for a kiss (!), you’re doing it wrong.


  9. on December 21, 2011 at 8:25 pm John Norman Howard

    Alas, if only their new-found disinterest would also extend to the man’s wallet and continued role as provider… sigh.


  10. To sum it up, succinctly: pretty much keep females always off-balance with unpredictable cruelty.

    They’ll love you for it…
    so much so…
    they’ll fuck you to death.

    Still, I no longer think there are any females worth suffering such a sublime fate for, and marriage is a trap muddying even the once-clearest of minds.

    In the 21st century, that’s what Game is for. Ditch the bitch and get another. That is what Game is for, right?


  11. What to do in first case ? (1. She is genuinely repulsed by a man’s betaness.) any solution?


    • This is a tough question that every beta must face before he can recover. In most cases it’s too late to do anything but walk away and start learning game.

      Trying the alpha switch rarely works because your track record of betatude colors the lens she sees you through. Your risk of being seen as incongruent is high. You would get a hotter girl if you started over fresh, alpha out of the gate, with a new girl.

      A question I have is under what circumstances will a girl become repulsed by too much alpha?


      • This will depend on the girl and what kind of alpha you are giving her. As an example, I admire directness in a man, yet a lot of women will perceive this directness as being an asshole. However, in my opinion, there is a very big difference between directness and expectation and and purely being and asshole because one can be.

        Can you give some examples of what you mean by too much alpha?


      • Stingray wrote: “Can you give some examples of what you mean by too much alpha?”

        You’re looking at it, babydoll.


      • (Said with a big smile)



  12. My gf went too far with the shit-tests and complaining. It was probably because after a while her shit-testing wore me down and I began to succumb to them…

    Then I dumped her. Firmly, but clearly letting her know something she did went too far.

    She switched from being bitchy shit-tester, to begging me to stay together, even showing up at my place twice with food and ready to cook.

    If that was a shit-test, I just pushed back. I’m polite but aloof. This now has woken her up.

    I also gamed a few other girls.

    One is 27, cute and very keen. Her shit tests go like this:

    Her text: “You left the party without saying goodbye to me!”

    Me: 20 minutes later: “Batman”

    Her; blah blah blah….

    When you pass a shit-test it pacifies them. If you start becoming defensive: “Sorry, I had to go, didn’t see you …” then they lose respect.

    Every woman wants to be dominated in some way. Shit tests ensure that dynamic.


    • One line per paragraph is a decent trademark, not good enough to challenge da gbfm, but I always recognize a walawala post before reading the name.

      Keep up.


  13. on December 21, 2011 at 10:49 pm Obstinance Works

    This is why I never try to “make it work.” Cue Fire Power sass.




    “the foul ministrations of a woman in thrall to her slow boil of hate for male enfeeblement”

    “for making her feel unfeminine”

    These are Heartiste’s proposed reasons why women berate–without shit-testing–men. At least for the first category of non-shit-testing beratement. This first category, the repulsion caused by betaness, is certainly not self-explanatory in terms of why it should be the case that women are repulsed. Whence the repulsion? Why should the cocktail of the betaness of a man and sexual advances delivered by that man so effectively engage a woman’s gag reflex?

    The beta is marked for deletion. His social ineptitude (both in terms of conversational skill and power status) signals to women that he has not been chosen by evolution, that to have his children is to walk down a path that leads nowhere. These ideas are, of course, unconscious fantasies, and NOT conscious thoughts that the woman reasons through while awake. But this only makes them more powerful motivators. And what do they motivate a woman to do? She is repulsed by betas because she is repulsed by social death. Because the beta is marked in this way, as a sign of death, the woman’s beratement becomes both a defense mechanism (against the inevitable social death which would similarly befall her if she were to shack up with the beta) and an affirmation (of the divine/evolutionary mark which has been placed upon the beta, an affirmation which gives her a sense of power in that she perceives herself as participating in something greater than herself, in the governing law of the world).

    I think this motivation for beratemant is closely linked to the motivation identified in Heartiste’s second category.

    “The woman chooses the physical and the stylistic for her barbs because she is projecting her very real female horror at coming up short in these two areas critical to her own SMV onto her man, for whom she mistakenly believes pokes at his physical attributes will have the same effect on him as it would on her; namely, the effect of luring him more deeply into an approval-seeking mode of thought and, thus, a stronger commitment from him that she much desires”

    I find this explanation very insightful and convincing. But I think there are other explanations. Namely, *a fear of losing the man produces an affirmation of the loss of the man.* When a woman encounters the possibility that her man will leave her, and if it is the case that she thinks highly of his power/status/smv/whatever, then her beratements may stem from a kind of self-hatred. She may want you to think like her, but her thoughts are likely consumed with, as Heartiste rightly points out, a kind of horror. This is not something to be dealt with lightly. Heartiste wrongly presumes that the man may play this kind of beratement off like a shit test. Her horror-induced beratements are suicidal because they affirm a mark of social death that is placed upon her when she is stepped over by her man in favor of more desirable women. Again, it is helpful to think of the concept of suicide as a metaphor.


  15. Heartiste, I need your help man.

    I’ve been reading your blog for a while. It’s really helped me step away from being a beta. Problem is that while my text game may be a 7 or 7+ (taking a while to respond, short replies, direct commands, making her message me), my face-to-face game is maybe a 6.

    Luckily for me the girl I’m trying to hook up with atm has a crush on me, so that’s maybe a point extra boost? I don’t really know. All the symptoms are there, so I’m pretty confident on this, f.ex. she laughs whenever I look at her a certain way and always texts me first, always tries to come over whenever she can, so on. Problem is I’m not the best at face-to-face game. She was supposed to come over today and I had a course all planned out, some stuff from your blog, some material from elsewhere, a bit of teasing, a bit of negs. Well, for whatever reason, she came over about an hour and a half late completely catching me off guard.

    We walked around town and met up with a friend of hers – big problem on my part. From being shy and flustered when with me she turned super social with her landwhale of a friend. Said landwhale wasn’t particularly friendly to me (not inwardly it seemed to me, outwardly she acted nice). This left me in the lurch. Said landwhale proceeded to off-handedly remark “I don’t think you two would go well together” and other such snide little comments intended obviously to reduce my chances of a successful hookup. “Hell hath no fury like a woman’s friends,” to paraphrase a famous quote. All in all a pretty annoying harpy. The day ended up with me walking my interest back home, so hopefully the landwhale hasn’t left too bad of an expression.

    Now my problem comes in: if at all possible, I need to hook up with this girl tomorrow. Yet as I mentioned my physical game is lacking- though I got the posture and aloofness down pretty comfortably, I can’t seem to segue into showing interest and thus somehow (?) initiating a make out session. Whence my predicament. Do you have any tips on somehow switching the aloof, couldn’t-care-less Corey Worthington façade into a “girl I want you” kind of deal? Or am I approaching it all wrong?

    Obviously I want to get physical (kids games, etc.) before kissing, to lessen the shock, and act confident, but this really jars with the whole idea of aloofness and I don’t get the transition. Once I get her in my doorway looking and smiling at me, I’m lost. What do I say? What do I do? How?

    Can you help me out with this, man? I’d be eternally grateful. Thanks!

    *I sent this in an email to you, just posting it here to make sure you see it. please don’t post this or redact it if possible? I just want to make sure you get it. Sorry and Thanks


    • Stupid request. Keep reading the blog, and up your game by making more approaches and avoiding oneitism.


    • ataulf wrote: “…the girl I’m trying to hook up with atm has a crush on me…”

      If you’re trying to get ass-to-mouth, you’re going to have to come a little heavier than Text Game, brother.

      “Problem is that while my text game may be a 7 or 7+ (taking a while to respond, short replies, direct commands, making her message me), my face-to-face game is maybe a 6.”

      Discontinue your text function. This crutch is socially retarding the generation coming up. In your case you are getting false confidence by thinking it worth a shit, and setting yourself up for the fall in the only milieu that matters: face-to-face. Text should be an add-on after you’ve mastered the basics, which you clearly haven’t.

      The basics course Game 101 is too tedious for me, but luckily Heartiste or a thousand of his imitator know-it-alls will be happy to give you solid advice. I wouldn’t know where to begin. Except THROW AWAY YOUR CELL PHONE (and vaporize Facebook). Smash that crutch up like they do to burners in “The Wire.” Godspeed, recruit.


    • “wow, I like your hair like that. I’ve never seen you with it up before……(now start acted interested and get touching/flirty)”

      “wow, I didn’t know you liked dinosaurs. That’s pretty cool, maybe I was wrong about you…(insert interest)”

      “mmmm you’re not as shy as I thought you were…I like a girl who’s comfortable talking joking about sex like that….(insert interest)”

      “you know, when I first met you I wasn’t sure about you. But after what you just did there, I don’t know, I guess you’re not as shy/quiet/boring as I thought…..I’m glad. (insert interest)”

      Etc etc any of those that fits or word it however you want. The basic formula is “acknowledge that you purposely haven’t shown interest because she hasn’t impressed you, but now tell her she’s impressed you (use ANYTHING, the way she laughs or the color of her shirt it doesn’t matter just pick something (best if it’s a personality characteristic like “I didn’t know you were so feisty!”)), then act like you’re changing your opinion about her as you trail off like you’re in thought, then escalate to put your arm around her or whatever and start showing interest.”

      Oldschool game concept we call qualifying her. It makes her feel like she’s won you over so the transition from aloof to interest makes sense to her chick-brain.

      Hope it helps.


    • on December 22, 2011 at 7:21 pm Obstinance Works

      Just enjoy the interaction and do what feels right. Sounds gay, but if you are a student of game you just have to work out what is in your brain already. Freestyle it for a while. You’ll learn from your mistakes only after you make them.


    • “I don’t think you two would go well together” and other such snide little comments intended obviously to reduce my chances of a successful hookup. “Hell hath no fury like a woman’s friends,” to paraphrase a famous quote.

      The next time this happens to you, you grab that girl with one arm, pull her close, and say :

      “She’s right you know. So tonight when we’re alone and you give me that look, I’m gonna take your hand and we’re gonna sit in front of the TV with some black coffee. And there we’re gonna watch Jimmy Swaggart sermons you hear me !!! And then we go to bed singing “Halleluja”

      Your love interest will laugh, and your critic will respond. And because the critic was direct in her attacks, her response will be direct as well, and very offensive.

      You let her rant, and when she’s finished, you just look straight at her and say :

      “I’ll tell her to give her Kama Sutra to you. She won’t need it”

      And then the two of you just walk away …


  16. Betaness is on the increase so we will see more hostility-mistaken-for-shit-testing in the future.

    Visit losthistorian.wordpress.com


  17. Best article in awhile, good points all the way down.


  18. In high school in the 80s, I was the subject of female hatred, loathing, revulsion, without even trying. It was embarrassing almost.


  19. How many of you people thought it strange that the 41 year-old childless white woman killed in that freak elevator accident on Madison Avenue last week was godified by the New York Times?

    [heartiste: i noticed that too. what, is she a martyr for the sex and the city crowd or something?]

    Slightly off topic I know.

    For more see :


    Sincerely, and Merry Christmas,

    – Arturo de Gheaube


  20. Anonymous
    Is the blogger aware of the murder that just happened in Murietta, California of Saskia Burke, the beautiful 18 year old daughter of a liberal male who took a black teenage male into his home two years ago who was from a dysfunctional home?

    People are murdered everyday, why is this one worthy of some special interest?

    Besides, the dad may have been some kind of pervert. Look at the Perdue abuse case and the Catholic church…

    Lots of white men prey on “disadvantaged youth” by pretending to help them, setting up “Foundations”, inviting them into their home, buying things for them… but sometimes it blows up in their face.

    Instant karmas gonna get you.

    [heartiste: “victim’s fault”.]


    • on December 22, 2011 at 2:55 pm John Norman Howard

      Yet another young White girl gets murdered by a nigger thug, but all the shitskin can say is “nothing-to-see-here-and-oh-by-the-way-YT-likes-black-boys”…

      And then the twacks of the world wonder why we hate them and look forward to a day of reckoning.

      All accounts will be settled, Sambo.

      And by the way, a lot of those “disadvantaged youth” allegedly being “preyed upon” are young ghetto hustlers, not the victims your disinformation campaign would have folks believe… but I digress.


    • Between comments like this and the other idiot who said they deserved it there are either a lot of trolls here or seriously fucked up people. Even if they manage to acquire game its going to be like Gacy Game.


      • on December 23, 2011 at 6:19 pm John Norman Howard

        Whether trolls or seriously fucked up people… all those roads lead mostly to the shitskins…or as our grandfathers would say, the proverbial “nigger in the woodpile”.


  21. […] Either she hates you or she loves you. Published: December 22, 2011 Leave a Comment Name: Required […]


  22. There’s another instance where a shit test isn’t a shit test. That’s when it comes from a foreign girl who has very little cultural basis for shit testing her man.

    One killer within my circle is from Turkey. And even though she’s well educated, the subtleties of shit tests are lost on her. When I toss one at her, she gets a genuine “I don’t understand” look on her face. At first I thought this was her effort to reframe, but realized that even though she’s lived in the US for 9 of her 32 years, she simply doesn’t have the learned neural pathways to understand. So, when she makes a comment that could be construed as a shit test, I see it as coming from one of two directions. Either she’s making a very poor attempt at emulating some of my own actions, or she’s got some genuine concern and is unable to say it directly because of her base cultural indoctrinations.

    Lastly, negs do work to some degree since she is unable to blow them off and takes them as gospel. But they must be a bit more subtle than what I would use on American women.


  23. In my experience, #2 also manifests itself after the woman has lost her man, and is still trying to win him back or seize control of the situation. Many of these insults will be completely off the mark (as Heartiste somewhat points out).

    For example, my most recent ex’s attempts to call me “fatass” when I have a six pack and point out my gray hairs (who cares? certainly not the 21 yr old and 2 24 yr olds I’m currently with) and their favorite-calling you a fag or faggot.

    They truly are evil creatures, and are just trying to hurt you when they say these things. In their minds, they are hurt, so you must. Do not respond. Should anyone really care about such barbs? I say no


  24. When a shit test isn’t a shit test in the 19th century:


  25. thwack

    Is the blogger aware of the murder that just happened in Murietta, California of Saskia Burke, the beautiful 18 year old daughter of a liberal male who took a black teenage male into his home two years ago who was from a dysfunctional home?

    White People are murdered everyday the black, why is this one worthy of some special interest?

    Besides, the dad may have been some kind of pervert. Look at the Perdue abuse case and the Catholic church…

    Lots of white men prey on “disadvantaged youth” by pretending to help them, setting up “Foundations”, inviting them into their home, buying things for them… but sometimes it blows up in their face.

    Instant karmas gonna get you.

    Good one, the white dad is punished worse than the black who slices up the white family. That wacky, nutty karma…

    It’s decided then: White people MUST invite more of the blacks into their homes.


    • Just because the Eloi feel sorry for Morlocks, doesn’t mean they won’t eat your smug, stupid, SWPL brains.


      • on December 23, 2011 at 12:19 pm John Norman Howard

        As much as it pains to admit, there is a certain grim satisfaction when karma takes such a turn and SWPL idiocy is repaid in such coin…

        But only if it makes the next SWPL do-gooder check his/her premises.


  26. That’s one way for the modern day barbarian to justify their crimes, say to yourself “Lots of white men prey on “disadvantaged youth” by pretending to help them,” uh huh.


  27. You’ve got to hand it to thwack though. His “My race right or wrong” attitude is a virtue, even if his race is usually in the wrong. If whites even had 1/10th the racial solidarity of a thwack they’d be much better off.


    • on December 23, 2011 at 12:14 pm John Norman Howard

      I’m not so sure it should count as a virtue… sticking up for one’s kind is one thing, but being blind to outright evil and attempting to rub it in the world’s face is another…

      And the thwacks of the world had better hope that YT never gains even 1/10th of the racial solidarity evinced by the darkies… because if that day ever occurs, within a week there won’t be a shit-colored face on the North American continue or Europe.


      • True that. White people are the ultimate Nice Guys. There was a John Derbyshire column from 2001 called “Nice Guys Get Illegal Immigrants”.


  28. This is rich:

    Married Family Values Republican female senate majority leader in MN has been caught thumping her male staffer:


    The letter to her from the Gay and Lesbian Alliance, apologizing for ruining the state of marriage and causing her to cheat on her husband, is amusing.

    One puzzling aspect, however, is how did the staffer get it up?


  29. on December 23, 2011 at 12:15 pm John Norman Howard

    Make that “continent”.


  30. Girl who I like sees me at a bar flirting and hugging other girls. The girl I like who is with her bf and my best friend says I’m creepy and that I groped her despite hearing (from accurate sources) that she likes it when I touch her. Is this an example of number 2?


    • a proper
      number 2
      is when you
      go at your gf’s house
      and she forthwith banishes you
      …from ever dumping there again


  31. The Avengers “Be a Caveman”

    You gotta treat your woman rough
    You gotta treat your woman tough
    Be a caveman, oh, oh, oh, keep her in line

    You gotta pull her by the hair
    Hold her tighter than a grizzly bear
    Be a caveman, oh, oh, oh, keep her in line

    You gotta show a woman who wears the pants
    If you want her to stick by you
    If you want her to be eating out of your hand
    Here’s what you’ve got to do…

    …be a caveman, keep her in line.


  32. John Norman Howard

    All accounts will be settled, Sambo.


    Whatever pink face,
    the white mans account is way over drawn and his entire system is being foreclosed on as we speak; even your empty threats and puffery don’t work like they used to.

    The funny thing about it is your destruction is entirely brought about by other white people like you.

    I tried to warn white people not to laugh at niggers cause they were next.

    You are so greedy you stole your own children’s future. They’re gonna be pissed when they find out what you did; can you fake Alzheimer’s?

    Good luck blaming this one on niggers.


  33. Shit test = Neg


  34. “I’m not saying there’s never a time for anger. There is. There is a time for red hot passion and white hot rage”

    The only women worth going to jail over is your mother or sister. Other than that, pffffffffffffffffttttttt.