Comment Of The Week: Butt Out Edition

RappaccinisDaughter (sock puppet alert) imparts a valuable lesson,

Hey, Greensleeves!

Check this shit out.

So I was just out hunting last weekend, and I got a shot on a nice doe. Lucked into it, really—I was late heading out to my blind setup and the sun had already risen, but lo! she walked right out in front of me. Now, I had to take the shot freehand because my sticks were still slung over my shoulder, and fuck my life, I was doing it with iron sights. But I have a nice .50-cal inline muzzleloader, and they’ll reach out as far as 200 yards, so if I can see it in the iron sights, I can hit it. Brought it up to my shoulder, focused on the front sight, and KA-FUCKING-BOOM!

I don’t know if you’ve ever shot a muzzleloader, but they make one hell of a smoke cloud. Even if you’re not in a blind, it can really make it hard to see how the shot went down. I knew I’d hit her, but by the time I came out of recoil (I didn’t even feel it at the time, but I had a nice bruise flowering on my collarbone by the next morning) she was gone, daddy, gone. You wouldn’t believe how strong a deer really is until you experience it firsthand; they can travel up to a quarter of a mile just on the oxygen that’s already in their muscles. Amazing creatures, really. And I was going to have to track her through some pretty heavy brush.

So the first thing you have to do is, you have to let the bullet do its work. If you start trying to track them right away, they’ll keep running. So I lit up a cigarette—mmmm! tobacco!—and smoked the whole thing, just standing there. Then I put it out and put the butt back in my pack (because I’m eco-friendly like that), and went to work. Luckily, there was a light snowfall, so when I got to where she’d been standing, the tuft of tawny fur was really easy to see. So was the blood trail, which thankfully started right there.

I wound up actually finding her about 45 yards away, piled up at the base of a tree. I like to follow the old German hunting traditions, given that it’s half my heritage, so I plucked a little twig and put it in her mouth, for her symbolic “last bite.” It’s kind of bittersweet, that moment, knowing that you’ve ended the life of this beautiful creature, but when I opened her mouth I saw how ground-down her teeth were. She was in good shape, but she was pretty old. Who knows if she’d have lasted out that winter?

Then, I had to tag her and start cleaning her. Gross, but necessary. Piece of advice—you really cannot beat the “butt out” tool for getting that part of the deer out of the way. I’d heard coyotes howling all the previous evening, so I figured I wouldn’t need to bother burying the gutpile. The ‘yotes would have taken care of it by sundown.

The bitch was hauling her out. I usually have this little sled-like arrangement that I use, but I’d been in such a rush that morning I’d forgotten to bring it along. So I had to grab her by her hind legs and drag her, because I’d ALSO forgotten to bring my blaze-orange engineer tape. There’s no way I’m going to try to haul her around on my shoulders without it…that’s a great way to get shot by another hunter.

I took her back to the cabin and wondered if I should finish butchering her, but then I remembered that I was the one who brought the handle of Knob Creek, so I figured I could cozen someone into doing it for me as long as I shared. (I’m still learning the butchering part—I tend to waste meat by accident.) But I did go ahead and get the backstraps out, and by the time everyone else made it back in, I had them going in the broiler for everyone’s lunch. Hooray! The End.

TL; DR for Greensleeves: If you’re going to write 500 words that have nothing to do with anything the original blog post is about, at least try not to bore everybody to fucking tears.

I laughed.

PS The reason I don’t think this is the ORD is that the writing, stylistically as well as substantively, sounds like the voice of a man. But bell curve tails exist to add a little spice to the patterns of life.





Comments


  1. ghey

    Like


    • > “The bitch was hauling her out.”

      Here I got my hopes up that it was RD’s bulldyke lover [Annie Leibovitz?] doing the hauling.

      Imagine then my disappointment when I realized that “bitch” was just a euphemism.

      Like


  2. on November 28, 2013 at 1:16 am RappaccinisDaughter

    The alpha thugs I chase after keep pumping and dumping me. I don’t think it has anything to do with my argumentative attitude or my ugly tattoos. Okay I’m just going to come out with it and just say it. The problem is I have a 3-inch clit and its scaring away the men once I drop my pants. I’ve had men kick me out after sex. its been a real problem. Should I see a plastic surgeon to correct it? I’m already 25 is it too late to fix a permanent mistake? Am I damaged beyond repair?

    Like


    • LOL Rap. Too bad about the tats, though. Huge turn-off for lots of men.

      Like


      • on November 28, 2013 at 1:47 am RappaccinisDaughter

        but the clit can be fixed with the right man with deep pockets.

        Like


      • on November 28, 2013 at 4:45 am Dr Killpatient

        How? By adding testicles to it?

        No. You’re fucked.

        Or actually unfucked.

        Like


      • on November 28, 2013 at 5:40 am RappaccinisDaughter

        well it can be done. a reverse sex change from female to male has been done successfully before. apparently they take a vein from your hand and attach your clit to the end of it. you know i alway knew that i never wanted children and after a search on the internet i’ve found whole entire online communities of people just like me who always just knew at a very young age that I was different from everyone else. sometimes you just gotta unfuck just to fuck.

        Like


      • Rapp. you there? why are you acting like this? you know I can’t stand up for you in front of everyone else. I have lost all credibility at this blog. I tried leading others for the sake of leading and i’ve been outed as a fraud. why are you making things more difficult for me? is this some kind of a shit test or sick joke? please stop this. you’re making me lose face. i mean i’ve already had a hard childhood and it was difficult enough to get care and attention from my parents and my depression is worsening. I can’t stand up for you and be a man and protect you the way you want me to.

        sorry

        Matt.

        Like


      • (psst: its not really her. The place has been overrun with trolls for the last several days.)

        Like


      • Let’s be fair to trolls…

        This recent rash of chateau befoulers would be an embarrassment as South Park characters.

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      • I suspected as much. However, if age has taught me anything, it’s that nothing’s impossible.
        I stand by my comment about tattoos, though. Very unattractive.

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    • > “I have a 3-inch clit and its scaring away the men once I drop my pants. I’ve had men kick me out after sex. its been a real problem. Should I see a plastic surgeon to correct it?”

      Back in college, I knew a Jewess like you, and she was so ashamed of her massive tits that she actually had breast REDUCTION surgery.

      I googled her recently, and as far as I can tell, she is never-married, with no children, and doubtless hitting the wall pretty hard at this point.

      Moral of the story being that you Jewesses would do a lot better if you could pull yourselves up by the bootstraps [yeah, I know, fat chance of that, but work with me here], out of all that wallowing in your hyper-narcissistic self-absorption and self-pitying and self-idolatry, and get out there in the real world, and find yourself a handsome young devil of a shegetz, with a twinkle in his eye, and a gun in his pocket, and get his ass drunk a day or two before you ovulate, and have him put a nice big bun in your oven.

      It’s really not that hard – all you have to do is be able to count to 28, divide by two to get 14, subtract a day or two from that, and then remember when you first started your period.

      You can do it.

      If only you want to.

      Like


      • lolz

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      • You can do it. If only you want to.

        No she can’t. She cauterized her Fill O’ Peen tubes. It will take more than just concentrating hard.

        Like


      • Then again, on second thought, it also means that I won’t be able to save her through prayer. I thought Jesus can heal all wounds but it appears I just poked a hole in my own paradoxical beliefs when I believe that not even divinity can save RD from the effects of her sickening promiscuous behavior or her argumentative attitude befitting a she-male with a gigantic clit-dick.

        I hope, however, that I am not beyond saving, and that concentrating hard (i.e. praying to Jesus) can help me quit being a contrarian pedant, a white-knighting ignoramus, and an old shut-in with little real-world experience and few material possessions but a thesaurus.

        Matt

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      • on December 1, 2013 at 3:41 am RappaccinisDaughter

        I promise I’ll change my whorish ways. I will respect my body for it is a temple of God. I will not defile it no longer. No! I will accept my body as the way God made me to be perfect and in his image. I will not talk ill of his wonderful creation.

        I promise to repent and confess of my sins to everyone and give my life to Jesus. in the name of the father, the son, and the holy ghost.

        Praise the Lord Hallelujah.

        [Chorus]
        This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.
        This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.
        This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.
        Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.

        I’m gonna take this light around the world and I’m gonna
        Let it shine.
        I’m gonna take this light around the world and I’m gonna
        Let it shine.
        I’m gonna take this light around the world and I’m gonna

        Let it shine.
        Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.

        [Chorus]

        I won’t let anyone blow it out, I’m gonna let it shine.
        I won’t let anyone blow it out, I’m gonna let it shine.
        I won’t let anyone blow it out, I’m gonna let it shine.
        Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine.

        [Chorus]

        Every day, every day, I’m going to let my little light
        Shine.

        Like


    • on December 2, 2013 at 7:20 am RappaccinisDaughter

      ^That’s not the real RD. I am the Real Rappaccini’s Daughter*. You can tell by my avatar, which seems to be linked to my IP address.

      Oh, and yes, I am the author of the “Butt Out” story highlighted above, which I wrote just for shits and giggles in response to the endless, obsessive crap my sockpuppet has been writing under my name, Matt King’s name, Amy’s name AND Patrice’s name for the last week or so.

      By the way, I’m pretty sure CH can see who’s who, in terms of those IP addresses.

      Like


  3. on November 28, 2013 at 1:24 am RappaccinisDaughter

    Like


    • on December 2, 2013 at 9:52 am RappaccinisDaughter

      Hey, Greensleeves-masquerading-as-me!

      Check this shit out!

      So I was at your mom’s house last weekend, eating the Thanksgiving turkey she didn’t burn the shit out of (she knows I like it rich n’ juicy!), when she confessed to me that she’s a huge fan of “50 Shades of Grey,” and that what she really wanted more than anything was to re-enact the fantasy sex sequences from that book. Apparently, she finds it hella hot and has worn out all the batteries from her Hitachi Magic Wand and figured I’d be happy to stand in for her.

      So I agreed, ran off in the other room and found a pair of her black panties, which I wrapped around my shoulders to use as a cape. Then I stuck a couple of candy corns over my canine teeth, and came back out saying, “Hurr durr, I’m a Mormon abstinence vampire transported into a really poorly written and not-that-sexy fanfiction!”

      Well, apparently that wasn’t quite what she wanted, so she read me the section that she thought was so hot. I was all, like, “Fine, bish, whatever, as long ath I get thome of that awethome-ath cookin’!” (I don’t really have a speech impediment, but those candy corns are kind of hard to talk around. Plus they were getting all soft and chewy from being in my mouth.) So I followed her into the bathroom to re-enact her favorite scene.

      She leaned up against the bathroom countertop, and I reached in between her flabs and folds until I located her tampon string. I was supposed to haul it out like a Mormon abstinence vampire, but hot damn! That thing was good and wedged in there. I pulled, I tugged, but…no dice. So finally I braced one foot up against the counter, got both hands on the string, and put all my weight into it.

      POW-PHLUMPTH! it came rocketing out, impacting the wall behind me. Instantly I realized what the problem was: First of all, it was the size of a standard fire hydrant; secondly, it was all sharny and brown at the end. I asked her, “WTF ith up with that?”

      “Oh,” she giggled, “I have to wear a super-hyper-mega-sized tampon in my ass all the time, ever since Greensleeves was born. You see, his dad used to really like to stick it in my butt, and although I’d been told it was impossible, we were able to conceive a baby that way. He weighed 9 whole Courics when he was born, and he really kind of tore me a new balloon-knot on the way out. My poor ringmeat has never been the same. Now…can you re-enact the rest of the scene, please?”

      So, hauling the world-record ass-tampon up with both hands, I deposited it in the toilet just like Christian Grey. Now, you may not know this about feminine hygiene products, but the way they work is by absorbing fluid. A regular-size tampon is, therefore, more than enough to clog most plumbing systems…and this was no regular-size tampon! Like I said, you could have used this thing to plug up an elephant. So instantly, it absorbed all the water in the bowl, followed by all the water in the plumbing system, followed by all the water in the aquifer.

      And that’s how the Great Drought of 2013 began. Hooray! The end.

      TL; DR: You are a butt-baby, and my elbow still smells like your mom. Also, candy corns make awesome fangs.

      Like


      • on December 5, 2013 at 2:26 am RD even WRITES (!) like a MAN

        Oh look the same old and stale copypasta fantasy/romance drivel from the EL James wannabe. I thought only 2nd graders were juvenile enough to still use ‘yo mama’ type jokes.

        Great job – you sure showed me by making up a BULLSHIT fantasy story about trying to fuck an old 60+ menopausal woman. Ouch, showing how deranged your fantasies are surely hurts me!

        Now let’s get back to reality: you are a chain-smoking, whiskey-drinking, gun-abusing, unfeminine whore of a she-male – with A-cups and a manjaw which would repulse every single Chateau resident – that is devoid of natural motherly instincts and who has spread her legs her entire life for abusive men that have hit and raped her on her eventual way to spinsterhood.

        In contrast to your story, that is ALL TRUE.

        Ouch – that’s gotta sting. CH was right – once you hit a woman where it hurts (namely, her low SMV value) she becomes so apoplectic that her mind leaves the realm of reality and into delusional fantasy.

        Oh let’s not even mention the countless times you’ve been embarrassed yourself during your posts. Speaking of which. have you apologized to Patrice yet for your ignorance?

        Jeez, even your own writing sounds like that of a man’s. How sad is that?! Are you really a woman?!

        I laughed hard that you actually had to tell people how to know when it’s the real you. Your posts have become so inane, deranged, and so easily predictable that you begin to blur the lines of real and fake and start to parody yourself. You are a specimen of high-art of the ironic sort. Man, that’s really pathetic.

        CH himself: “PS The reason I don’t think this is the ORD is that the writing, stylistically as well as substantively, sounds *like the voice of a man* (!). But bell curve tails exist to add a little spice to the patterns of life.”

        LOL. So pathetic.

        I await your new fantastical insipid drivel that desperately tries to change the topic from how pathetic your life is. Get to it!

        Like


  4. I was the original sock-puppet that started this, a few threads ago, about a week ago. It is a pleasure to talk to you proprietors. A quick IP check on me proves this to be the truth.

    I wasn’t even sock-puppeting this thread yet; the previous RD’s before this comment were another imposter (RD wishes she were 25, but oh man, I laughed hard at that green sleeves youtube link). I know Matt, RD, and Amy won’t believe me, but I am not the only person with contempt for those 3 buffoons that embody the very anti-thesis of Chateau doctrine. And I am very delighted to see more people – CH regulars like Zombie Shane, Sigma Male, Stilicho, #1, etc. – join in on the fun.

    I am happy you laughed – after being an avid reader of the Chateau for many years since the old days of its sole proprietorship under R – and it feels good to see some of my best work get recognized. Perhaps now I get a sort of coupon from you – a free answered email from CH for any one of my concerns?

    I have eviscerated Matt, Amy, and RD into puddles of quivering nothingness, rendering them into a dumbfounded state where they cannot respond to me on topic, but can only resort to thinly-veiled tactics of topic change (Amy thinks she rejected me at a bar; RD thinks I want to fuck her and wants to talk about my English while making up her own words herself; Matt white-knights all women without regard to right or wrong). Seriously – I school them on all points, either Chateau doctrine or the pathos of their own lives as solipsistic and intellectually dishonest bad-boy loving whores, or a hypocritical religious zealot white-knight – and all they can do is squirm, change the topic (even when it’s about their own lives), and try to ignore their unpleasant reality that I illustrate.

    I invite all of you to read all of my work (pure artistry, really) and correspondence with these clowns; these 3 fails so hard that is it quite rare to see such blatant stupidity showcased for the entire world to see. I attach an Appendix at the end. Yes, I am that proud of my work.

    Lastly, I want to take this opportunity to talk to the CH readership myself and my fans:

    I want to thank you for helping me, so to speak, take out the trash. Though I have started this, now I see that I am not the only one doing it.

    Matt is a white-knighting religious hypocritical fraud, Amy is your typical white-trash (term used loosely; she is a mudshark) whore that slept around with tatt’d up felons and gets mad and throws ad-hominem attacks when she has her attraction to badboys pointed out, and RD is an ugly chain-smoking gun-toting whiskey-drinking shemale whore with unfeminine A-cups that gets wet from putting herself amongst men that hit and rape her, who also changes the topic into things like English grammar to avoid the uncomfortable truth.

    As a token of my gratitude, I will out myself as GBFM (lolzozlozlzolzolz). Being a father has opened my eyes to being more of a clearer teacher, so I will now write in a more mature and coherent manner. I – and my followers – will purge the Chateau of unworthy blood that permeates the hearts of those that do not embody our ideals.

    Finally here is the Appendix. I promise that each and every post is entertaining and enlightening, as well as abrasively incriminating toward the shitposters known as Matt King, Amy, and RD (I would go after Greg Eliot too but his posts are too incoherent for me to follow).

    The essential synopsis of each and every discussion is how I school them on CH points – while pointing out that their very existence goes against CH teachings – and all they can do in return is say “I don’t want to sleep with you”, talk about deer hunting, English syntax, or other such obvious red-herring topic changes. Guaranteed or your money back.

    —————
    Appendix: (all of this happened within the last week of blog posts)

    being Matt King – top of ‘Types of Men…”

    Court of Law of 3 clowns + being Amy – towards top of “Your Daily Game”

    being RD and Matt King – upper-middle of “Your Daily Game”

    calling Amy out – top of “Female Preference for Bad Boys…”

    calling Amy out + being Matt King – middle of “Female Preference for Bad
    Boys….”

    my first correspondence to RD (she discusses her rape, but not the one I gave her verbally) + calling out Matt – middle of “Chicks Dig Psychotic Killers”

    my first correspondence with Amy and Matt – lower middle of “Make Yourself More Attractive…”

    ——————-

    P.S. One more thing – I did not write that RD post about killing animals in the Chateau OP. She wrote it herself, in her typical off-topic delusional rant to avoid my on-topic points about the unpleasantness that is her life, so of course stylistically it sounds like the voice of a man. She has a clit-dick bigger here than most men’s.

    And RD, now I talk to you directly – strange you ask me to follow the original blog post, when you are also guilty of breaking this idea yourself, but you amusingly don’t mention this when you aren’t losing an argument and looking bad. Nice to see how desperate you.

    [Oh – and the “boring 500 words” that I wrote about that you referenced (which your ego found too damaging to respond with anything germane about what I said so your 500-lb radioactive hamster wrote about hunting deer) was about you and your life. Talk about irony, right?]

    Like


    • on November 28, 2013 at 6:15 am Edmund McRofling

      tldr. Your collection of star wars figurines is showing.

      Like


      • on November 30, 2013 at 8:12 pm The Most Interesting Man in the World

        says the white-knight? projection of your own self-beliefs is a common defense mechanism, I hear. the troll is doing a good job of cleaning up the filth.

        great work white-knighting not just women, but ANOTHER known white-knighter (Matthew King). a new low. your collection of omegatude is showing.

        Like


      • im sure there are other fans of matt king on this blog right now. if there are any other supporters of matt king would you please post now? right here? right now?

        Like


      • on December 1, 2013 at 10:26 am Edmund McRofling

        Intramural status-jockeying behavior among sexless terminal-room trolls doesn’t translate well outside that subculture. All we have to do is not waste our time reading your wall of word salad.

        The dude you’re ranting at really isn’t really a girl, by the way.

        Tool.

        Like


      • LOOK AT THIS. finally another fan for the MATT KING FANCLUB, look he is as devoted as I to the MATT KING cause. Edmund McRofling step right up and claim your official MATT KING’s “pearls before swine” personally autographed bumper sticker and enter for a 1 in 50 chance to meet MATT KING in the flesh. also dont forget next month we have our new MATT KING autobiography coming out “Pearls Before Swine” so hurry reserve yours today. Limit one per customer. Rain checks will not be accepted. first come first serve.

        Like


      • lol white knight got so mad when he sees whorish women and his jesus freak buddy matt king called out.

        when you see crybaby edward mcdoofus is upset, then you know you are doing something right.

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    • I have eviscerated Matt…

      The only thing you’ve eviscerated is your therapist’s dreams of bringing you back to a semblance of sanity.

      You fairy.

      Like


    • > “Being a father”

      BOO-YAH.

      lolzozlozlzolzolz.

      PS: If the baby gets colic, then NUTRAMIGEN is your friend:

      http://www.walmart.com/search/search-ng.do?Find=Find&search_query=nutramigen

      http://www.target.com/s?searchTerm=nutramigen

      http://www.amazon.com/s?field-keywords=nutramigen

      Like


    • “As a token of my gratitude, I will out myself as GBFM (lolzozlozlzolzolz). Being a father has opened my eyes to being more of a clearer teacher, so I will now write in a more mature and coherent manner. I – and my followers – will purge the Chateau of unworthy blood that permeates the hearts of those that do not embody our ideals. ”

      Not sure if Heartiste’s vanity needed that little pick me up.

      You sure you are GBFM? I thought GBFM was religious.

      Man, I hope you do not think about this blog at all when you eat your turkey tonight. Do you have any artistic outlet? You seem to have a lot of sensitivity to express. I hope you are able to channel that into something creative.

      Like


      • If I’m wrong, may the real GBFM(TM) school me, but Da GBFM would never leave off an exhortation to honor and sublimity, least of all if he were basking in the glow of fresh-minted fatherhood.

        Methinks this is only the troll’s latest charade.

        Like


      • No, I’m pretty sure it is actually GBFM. He used the null gravatar (the one that shows when a commenter does not enter any e-mail address) rather than his old one, but it all makes sense now.

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      • lolzlolzoz respectfully, I submit our troll is just rifling through the dramatis personae of the Chateau’s masque, now that he’s on a roll.

        Did Matt King Matt really write the plea to the false-RD, btw? That’s not like our Matt, to panic.

        No: the upstart may be a talent on the rise, but I daresay da 1&only GBFM is just busy with his multimedia empire for the moment.

        But I hope da GBFM will hit all his old haunts soon, regardless.

        Like


      • GBFM (at least under his known handle) has been strangely silent for the last several weeks at least. If this guy was your run-of-the-mill troll, he wouldn’t even know about him. Our new verbose troll does share GBFM’s tendencies for long posts that include sections of older posts pasted in. The only reason I think this fellow may not be GBFM is because he claims he had never attacked Matt King before, whereas GBFM quite frequently mocked Matt’s manhood. (But that may be simply like a case of a dude ragging a guy he considers a friend with a “your mom” joke.)

        But regardless of whether or not our new verbose troll is in fact GBFM, I’ve been quite impressed. I’ve taken quite a bit of satisfaction at seeing RD and Amy punked. Matt King, not quite so much, because I like him — Matt got in trouble both via his white-knighting tendencies that makes it seem that he pedestalizes women (Matt, dude… these broads aren’t worth it. Really.) as well as a contrarian attitude which he adopts in inappropriate situations, like a bratty younger brother that is always trying to argue with you just for the heck of it.

        Did Matt King Matt really write the plea to the false-RD, btw? That’s not like our Matt, to panic.

        No, the false RD and false Matt King at the top of this thread are a separate copycat troll.

        Like


      • GBFM has made allusion to writing under the influence of methylphenidate (ritalin) before. Given his typical writing style that is *totally* unsurprising. lol

        Both the Butt Out comment and his comment as gbfm – reborn have the same hypomaniac, meticulous vibe that someone writing on coke, addy, or ritalin has.

        Totally plausible that our new troll is GBFM.

        I have to say I’ve been loving his work as #1 FAN:

        #1 FAN
        @matt

        matt you are in pain? are you alright? are you hurt? who is causing you pain? tell me who it is causing you this pain. i’ll fight them off for you.

        😀

        Like


      • Take that back on the Butt Out comment. That was actually RD. Derp.

        Like


      • The two (twelve) trolls are one and the same. Same manic repetitiveness and prolixity, Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V copypasta, weirdly detailed obsessions.

        The fellow is socially disturbed, and CH pedestalized him, giving him an outlet for unhealthy release here. I think he flits around on a dozen or more identities. CH encourages it, knowing the IP behind this years-long campaign of sockpuppetry.

        It’s like dressing up an eighth grader with Down Syndrome and encouraging him to hit on chicks. Just to see what happens. (Well, in a way, that’s what this site does best anyway.)

        Not that either of them would take this the right way, but: I am genuinely sorry for him. The internet magnifies personality quirks that can turn regular foibles into serious psychological problems. I would rather get this lost fellow on track than exploit his neuroses.

        E-mail me, brother.

        Matt

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      • Matt, I’m sorry to see you subjected to the humiliation of a bargain-bin imposter; but really, you should start your own blog. All differences aside, a figure of your established stature and loquacious eloquence would be guaranteed at least a mid-tier rank in traffic and influence in the ‘sphere. You’re already a “name brand”.

        But a man of your reading should at least be able to separate some of da GBFM’s ironic filters from his message. He is certainly not on Ritalin, but a man who reports on a world that is.

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      • White-knighting a known white-knight and irreligious hypocritical fraud?

        Maybe you are new here, but gbfm (or whoever our new verbose troll is) is hardly a ‘bargain-bin’ imposter and his work has been very meticulous and clever if you actually bothered to read it. Perhaps you should get your facts right before brown-nosing this Jesus freak.

        What has this blog become?

        Like


      • @Rouge: I was talking about the recent troll who has claimed himself as GBFM above, which troll assuredly is NOT the one and only GBFM(TM), whose oeuvre I first analyzed in Dec 2011:

        http://luciussomesuch.wordpress.com/2011/12/20/great-books-for-men-greatbooksformen-gbfm-tm-gb4m-tm-gr8books4men-tm-raps/

        and in many subsequent exchanges with the great man himself, at his blog and my own.

        As to da Matt King Matt, I have valiantly eviscerated him before:

        http://luciussomesuch.wordpress.com/2013/08/19/the-longer-matt-king-matt/

        and stand by same. I merely acknowledge, as I would for my darkest foe, the indignity of his persona being snatched away (albeit somewhat humorously) by a troll. Also, a certified matt king matt king matt blog would be a locus for a Vox/McRapey scale blogosphere feud btw matt and all his aggrieved and amused betters, to say nothing of endless matt/matt’s camp followers omega pda displays, and thus a source of endless mirth

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      • Matt, I’m sorry to see you subjected to the humiliation of a bargain-bin imposter…

        The only one humiliated is said bargain basement troll… under which no self-respecting bridge would have it.

        Maybe you are new here, but gbfm (or whoever our new verbose troll is) is hardly a ‘bargain-bin’ imposter and his work has been very meticulous and clever if you actually bothered to read it.

        PUH-LEEZE! I don’t think it’s gbfm, first and foremost… and secondly, your sense of aesthetics could use some refinement if you find this troll’s try-hard-and-all-too-obvious bushwa “clever”. Your steeped-in-South-Park what passes for taste is showing.

        Perhaps you should get your facts right before brown-nosing this Jesus freak.

        And perhaps YOU should get your own nose out of the Cathedral’s ass… you fairy.

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      • Greg, have you actually read anything that gbfm- reborn before you brown-nose Matt, a known religious hypocrite? It doesn’t look like it. He insulted people with down’s syndrome in this thread alone.

        Why defend such a fraud? Oh right – you are one yourself. You guys must not really respect Christ to evangelize for him in such a corrupted manner.

        Also, Greg, you old deranged geezer, the fact that you are the single most incoherent poster on this site that repeatedly calls other people “fairy” in substitution for a real argument doesn’t help your case. Half the shit you say is incomprehensible.

        Also, you should know, seeing as how much you like Matt – homosexuality is banned in the Old Testament.

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      • I have no doubt that you miss half of the meaty references, jests, and flat-out wisdom I impart here at the chateau… and in your limited South Park mentality, dismiss it as “incoherent”.

        As far as the simple “You fairy” dismissals I dish out, I (and others) have often said that, past a certain point, debates and arguments are superfluous, and only taunting is called for.

        Be made wise, now… lest I taunt you further.

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      • Greg, have you actually read anything that gbfm- reborn before you brown-nose Matt, a known religious hypocrite?

        Was anyone addressing you? Or are you admitting Rogue is just one of your sock puppy escapades?

        It doesn’t look like it. He insulted people with down’s syndrome in this thread alone.

        Oh my word… imagine that, insults at the chateau… soil my lace handkerchief. Your feigned outrage reeks itself of hypocrisy, so watch where that finger is pointing.

        Why defend such a fraud? Oh right – you are one yourself. You guys must not really respect Christ to evangelize for him in such a corrupted manner.

        Stripes for the backs of fools, as Proverbs says. Check out some of Christ’s rebukes for not only the Sanhedrin, but even His best friend Peter… then come back and tell me how evangelizing is supposed to go.

        It never fails to make me shake mah haid how you nonbelievers attempt to shame Christians with their own Scripture, about which you know nothing.

        Also, Greg, you old deranged geezer, the fact that you are the single most incoherent poster on this site that repeatedly calls other people “fairy” in substitution for a real argument doesn’t help your case. Half the shit you say is incomprehensible.

        I can be accused of many things, but incoherence isn’t one of them. If you fail to catch the references in my meaty jests and barbs, then that speaks more to the limitations of your own South Park snark education rather than my coherence. Tell me which ones you didn’t savvy and I’ll be happy to explain how the jest fell flat.

        Also, you should know, seeing as how much you like Matt – homosexuality is banned in the Old Testament.

        And thus endeth the tale, with the usual combo of South Park snarkery and Cathedralesque shaming litany when a bro stands up for another bro.

        Hit the road, kid… that show closes out of town.

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      • This can’t be the real Matt. I am sure the real Matt isn’t so dumb that he cannot distinguish among the main verbose troll (gbfm – reborn) and many of his followers. There are many substantive differences as well as stylistic ones in their writings.

        Also, it’s called “down’s” syndrome. It’s not like a religious person to make fun of people with mental disabilities like that.

        I am not sure the real Matt would avoid debate and just throw ad-hominem attacks with special insensitivity towards those born with disabilities, especially if he is a follower of Christ. It seems like a cowardly way of handling defeat against his opponent’s legitimate points (reading their previous dialogue in a different thread, he had legitimate gripes with Matt’s inappropriate remarks – as well as his needless white-knighting – and found them to be hypocritical coming from a so-called “religious” person).

        Matt’s holier-than-thou attitude at the end doesn’t help his case either.

        In the off-chance that you truly are the real Matt – you are not just a fraud, but a dumbass too. You are deluding yourself that there is only person that dislikes you. I have no problem with Christ, myself, but you do Him a disservice by being such a hypocritical evangelist. Seek the help that you hurry to dispense onto others.

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      • “matt king” would never ever ever ever masquerade and troll under 12 different pseudonyms such as “patrice”, “maurice”, etc… to advance his own propaganda. besides a king never does his own dirty work and it would be hypocritical to accuse others of trolling when he does it himself. matt king is not a hypocrite his words only scream consistency and truth 100% of the time. all the time.

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      • look what MATT KING has got here a real red herring. a possible alternate spelling for down/down’s syndrome. the competition’s argument is rendered completely unintelligible for suggesting a spelling different from Matt King. the arguers entire argument has absolutely NO merit in its entirety. every single sentence is now a fallacy to be overlooked now. Pearls before swine indeed. like and an artist carving up a snapper.

        who else can do this but Matt King.

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      • Oh, look what Matt has – an alternative spelling for a name.

        That definitely excuses your lovely behavior as an ignoramus who -among many things – cannot distinguish among obvious multiple trolls, insensitive religious fraud insulting those with diseases in your
        hypocritical remarks, and a blind white-knighter with a disdain for truth and arrogant holier-than-thou attitude.

        As I said before: seek the help yourself that you hurry to dispense
        onto others.

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    • “I am happy you laughed (,CH)”

      “One more thing – I did not write that RD post about killing animals in the Chateau OP.”

      WTF?

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    • I thought the whole exchange was… strange. But also oddly interesting and not a little amusing. Sort of like the evil genius with a British accent confronting the main characters at the climax of a movie.

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      • This is all like a movie.

        But the real corvinus would never write such a post! You are a troll sock puppetted by Matt K.

        But wait! The real Matt K would never! All along, Matt K has been a sock puppet of Greg Elliot!

        Alas, the plot thickens! All of these posters are just trolls created by CH!

        Man, reading this whole comment subculture thread was so dorky that I feel even my female sex appeal must have been compromised a point by witnessing it.

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    • I love it. Bravo. Now, since we are veering recklessly close to honesty, would you care to admit to also being my personal favorite?

      I’m talking about GSG aka gregi, of course.

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    • Yikes. This is what happens when you aggrandize an autistic shut-in for years. Not pretty. Not healthy for anybody, especially the undiagnosed paranoiac. Shame on you, CH.

      Next thing, you two will be driving off a cliff Thelma & Louise style.

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  5. on November 28, 2013 at 6:13 am Edmund McRofling

    Your Daily Game: Leave a Butt Out on your bedside table when you bring a girl home.

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  6. on November 28, 2013 at 7:56 am Cannon's Canon

    lol at this

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  7. I have no idea what the fuck you people are talking about, but “Butt Out” rules!

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  8. Here is a funny story about Microsoft having to apologize for suggesting that men might be more eager to buy an Xbox and slay zombies, and for suggesting how to sell the idea to their girlfriends.
    http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2013-11-27-microsoft-slammed-for-sexist-xbox-one-ad

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  9. So this is what the decay of civilization looks like.

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  10. No real hunter uses a blind. The antidote to bruising is placing the rifle butt firmly into the meat of one’s shoulder. Butt out tool? Get in there with your pocketknife, free up the poop chute, and pull it out with the rest of the guts.

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  11. PS The reason I don’t think this is the ORD is that the writing, stylistically as well as substantively, sounds like the voice of a man. But bell curve tails exist to add a little spice to the patterns of life.

    No, it was really RD. I could tell by the gravatar.

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  12. After trying to read and understand comments from previous posts I had to check that it’s not April’s fools today. So just another bunch of trolls sockpuppeting?

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  13. This is bullshit. RD may have her opinions and quirks, and Matt may white-knight too much, and Amy may be a bit too pliant in her comments, but none of them “embod(ies) the antithesis of CH doctrine”. They’re pretty clear that they agree with just about all of it. So do I, and so do other commenters that have their own, slightly different take on various posts and issues. I suppose CH and the mini-me writing team encourage, with their mean streak, this sort of mob-takedown of commenters who are not compliantly in the amen corner of every post- but this kind of thing pushes away the interesting voices and conversations, and degrades this blog into the worst stereotype of the manosphere as a bunch of angry, subliterate, bitter keyboard jockeys. It’s actually better to go in the other direction- out of the echo chamber into the mainstream, where most of these ideas should ultimately belong. We are very far from the glory days of 2008-2009, when this board had one of the smartest commentariats around.

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    • Dude… enough with the libtardery and concern trolling.

      First of all, RD and Amy were hardly “interesting voices and conversations”, and their expulsion is no loss. I do hope Matt eventually learns that white-knighting certain broads here is casting pearls before swine, and being contrarian where it’s unwarranted just pisses people off.

      As far as agreeing with “just about all of it”, that’s not the point. If they’re being boneheaded heretics, i.e., the little bit that they don’t agree with is something essential, then there’s a problem.

      And I wouldn’t consider us to be “angry”, let alone “subliterate” (!) or “bitter”. Our new verbose troll looked to me as if he was having quite a bit of fun playing the hard-nosed NYC district prosecutor.

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      • Corvinus is on fire.

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      • You’re taking the social dynamic of a comment section far too seriously, Corvinus. That you have in common with GBFM. Any one of us can disappear as easily as we came here, which does not allow for thick personal connectivity.

        There is nothing that anyone can “do” in this under-the-fold combox-riot to “piss” me “off.” Not even this latest, most strenuous attempt by some pitiable dude I will never meet (abetted by a mercurial/vain host, whom I also will never meet) can faze me. If you find yourself getting annoyed by anyone’s antics here, it is time to check yourself.

        “Then there’s a problem.” Not really, no. Not ever.

        Matt

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      • applause. corvinus for King!

        (Matt certainly isn’t one).

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      • kings are chosen by the people and never self declared.

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      • If I may paraphrase from memory, if it still serves:

        “The great man doesn’t wait to be elected… he declares himself.”
        Napoleon

        Be made wise… and stop spouting uneducated nonsense.

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