Chicks Dig Jerks: The Veil Of Self-Deception

Swatting her cat off her couch before sitting down on it, I rested my eyes on her thighs and then up at her face. Cradling a tumbler of scotch, I asked, “How was ladies’ night with the girls? Any juicy gossip?”

She beamed with eagerness and inhaled loudly. “It was great! Let’s see, what have I heard… Oh, there was this girl Gillian, you haven’t met her, an old high school friend of Kelly’s, who’s been seeing this guy for eight years. Everyone hates Gillian’s boyfriend because he’s cheated on her, more than once.”

“Worse than a one night stand?”

“Much worse, but that’s bad too, so don’t get any ideas. He was cheating on her for a whole year with another girl. He had a relationship with this girl while he was seeing Gillian.”

“Wow, that is…”, I searched for a suitably ambiguous word that would simultaneously express disapproval and admiration, “…brazen.”

“It’s dickish is what it is! And then after Gillian found out, he cheated on her again with someone else. But Gillian never left the guy. Eight years together, and she’s still seeing him.”

Doing my best to affect surprise and consternation, I stentoriously proclaimed, “I would think that a hidden relationship with another woman is pretty solid grounds for breaking up, but I guess Gillian didn’t see it that way.”

“I know, it’s crazy. And Gillian is really attractive, too. She could have any guy she wanted. There were tons of guys at the club going up to her, but she couldn’t be bothered. Why she stays with him is a mystery.”

I cocked an eyebrow. “Do you have a picture of her from the night?”

She held the camera in front of me. “It’s her.” I solemnly judged. A hard 9.

She exasperated, “We’ve tried telling Gillian to dump him, but she won’t listen. All she does is complain about him, but she never leaves him. So we gave up trying to help her. If that’s what she wants. It just doesn’t make any sense why a girl with her looks would put up with that from a…”


“Yeah, a douchebag.”

Mischievous tendrils curled around my thoughts. “I’ve noticed it’s the prettiest girls that go for the biggest assholes. Why do you think that is?”

“Well…” she stutters. “I don’t know. *I* don’t go for assholes.” She smiles and pushes me into the couch cushion.

“I think hot girls love a challenge, and assholes give that to them.”

My sexy interrogation subject looked around the room distractedly, as if the conversation had suddenly ceased to enthrall her.

I pressed. “I bet there are lots of great guys who would treat Gillian well, who she doesn’t give the time of day to.”

“I guess so. What can I say? Who knows why some girls go for these guys. I can’t figure it out. It’s not something I would do.”

“I know you wouldn’t.” I poked her cat in the anus with a pen I was holding. It meowed and leapt to the floor.


If you ask the typical woman why girls, particularly good-looking girls, dig jerks, you’ll usually get a flurry of denials or a shoulder shrug of bewilderment. What you will never get is an accurate appraisal of the phenomenon. There is such a glaring disconnect between the reality of girls chasing after assholes, (something which every man who has lived a day in his life has seen often enough that it has become a well-worn cliche), and the inability of girls to recognize the readily observable facts of their own behavior, that it leads one to believe women were born with a self-deception mental module that prevents them from having sufficient awareness of their sexual desires.

If this is so, then it at once must engender a sort of charmed understanding, even cooing pity, for women when they attempt to grapple with the issue of their sexuality, like children fumbling with letter blocks to form that first monosyllabic word. We want to reach out and hug them for the accomplishment of achieving cognizance of 1% of what motivates their lust. It is simply the case, therefore, that a full theory of female sexual behavior must include the working assumption that women are barred by some shadowy biological force emanating either from the brain case or the loins from, one, recognizing their actions in the sexual marketplace for what they are and, two, from properly explaining them when they do accept the facts laid before them.

Women truly DO NOT UNDERSTAND why it is they love the types of men they do. Evolution, in its infinite wisdom, has decided that it is in the best interests of genetic propagation for women to be fairly well shielded from the crass machinations of their own lust drives, in a way that men are not. So the next time a girl who is very important to you, and whose opinion you respect, bafflingly throws up her hands in complete ignorance of the ancient urges that guide her attractions, do the wise thing and cut her some slack. She really has no idea.


  1. First!


    • on July 26, 2011 at 3:35 am Thin-Skinned Masta-Beta

      Doesn’t anybody see the irony?

      Heartiste’s (Roissy’s?) lady is boasting that she’s so clever and would never fall for an cheating asshole like her poor naive friend…

      Blind about the nature of her desire as she is blind about her own situation.

      Was Roissy ever a harmless faithful fella?

      Not to criticise, but it’s a lifestyle he always seemed quite candid about.


      • The irony was pretty much the whole point of the story. Roissy poking the feline companion of Miss “I’m a goooood girl” in the rear with a pen was both a symbolic and literal interpretation of the reality of his “relationship” with this notch.

        I must say, it was a masterstroke of subtlety, and a brilliant way of driving the point home to those of us who can see.

        That point, of course, is that the power of female rationalization is so strong that a girl who can clearly see something wrong in her friend’s relationship will remain completely ignorant of precisely the same thing happening in her own relationship.


      • Yep… we all got it.


      • It’s a willful blindness in the women who stay with true jerks, unfortunately. Women look for the qualities of an honest alpha male, and find a few of them in jerks. Or so they manage to convince themselves, when actually they’re projecting the qualities they want onto the man they’ve got, instead of making themselves willing, submissive and available to the man they really want. The pattern always repeats, until they settle down with some poor beta poser and start pounding him into an undesirable mockery of the man they wanted. A malleable thing they can never respect, and shouldn’t. Sickening.


  2. on July 25, 2011 at 2:09 pm Ari Hinkelberger

    When you’re really interested in a chick and you want to bang her and she isn’t feeling it, this theory will really depress you. Mostly because it is 100% true. In life, there is one constant; chicks dig assholes.


    • Some of them are dumb enough to actually prefer assholes, yes. What most of them want, though, is a guy who’s going to take them in hand, instruct them in how to get and give what they both want and who will be his own man. Even if that means telling the woman to shut up once in a while and stop trying to change him. Do they know that’s what they want? Hell, no. By the time they figure that out, they’re too old, or they have let themselves go or they’re so bitter that trying to find a guy they really want is self-defeating. It dooms them to a series of betas who will all try to “make them happy.”


    • Surely it is less depressing. Once you have discovered this initially confusing but logical paradigm, all you have to do is apply your knowledge – she will be yours! or perhaps not, who knows.


  3. If that’s true, then why do those same women suddenly seem to get a fast jolt of ‘understanding’ the moment their looks pass below a certain standard of beauty? Why do their preferences ‘inexplicably’ switch from bad boys to nice guys the second they realize that they are no longer fresh commodities?

    I think the ‘inability to understand’ is inauthentic; it’s just another part of women’s tendency to manipulate and prevaricate in the pursuit of superior mating opportunities…


    • Subconscious motivations.


    • Because women’s real competition is – Other Women

      When all of a sudden the assholes start focusing on younger hotter tighter, the hamster part of the brain goes – uh oh

      Self serving rationalising self interest to one degree or another kicks in, eventually, for most of them.


      • Awesome point. If you don’t work harder than the competition at keeping yourself attractive and interesting, and don’t satisfy your partner, then naturally, your man’s going to leave you, or at least cheat, eventually. Expecting anything else is like seeing a tidal wave coming your way and not expecting to get doused. This “shock” they claim to experience is nothing but self-deception or worse, the result of their just not caring. Why is it okay for women to take their men for granted?


    • Assholes are desired by other women, once their beauty drops they can not longer get these disired guys. It would be in their best intrest to find a provider.


    • Their own beauty blinds them.


  4. It’s perception and their own reality. Amazing, really.


  5. I have another theory. They do know and would rather not tell.

    Easier to spot alpha males that way.


    • on July 25, 2011 at 5:25 pm laconophile

      Women admitting to potential suitors what they find attractive is like teachers giving students all of the answers before a test.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 7:12 pm DiamondEyes

        forget potential suitors, what about giving that info to their own sons? why do mothers lie and turn their own sons into worthless betas? answer that and stay fashionable.

        [Editor: This is strong evidence in favor of the Chateau hypothesis that women simply don’t know how their own desire works. Mothers can’t teach their sons that about which they themselves have no conscious apprehension.]


      • on July 25, 2011 at 7:28 pm laconophile

        I never said they were consciously withholding their preferences.

        But I suppose mothers instinctively train their sons to be alphas because in a natural environment a scrawny alpha-acting adolescent would be killed pretty easily by a real muscular alpha.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 7:29 pm laconophile

        oops I meant instinctively train their sons to be betas.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 8:56 pm Rufus T. Harlemberry

        By the time a mother is passing on her “wisdom” about women she will most likely be past her prime. She may have given up on chasing those alphas and may even have some regrets about her time with bad boys. She may think she is correcting her past mistakes. She may also be a cunting feminist.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 3:20 am Thin-Skinned Masta-Beta

        My mom always tells how that she picked my dad in college from a multitude of potential suitors. He was the only one at the time that had the backbone who told her that he wouldn’t put up with her immature shit (tests).

        Hollywood tells us that men are supposed to cater to every whim of our desired princesses. You know, cover that bed in rose petals….

        Forget that crap, listen to mom.

        I never had the sense that she cheated while they were married, but as a widow, she gets more dates than my brother or me.

        Having seen how such a dominant “shit-testing” character evolves into a pretty challenging marriage partner, I’m concerned that picking a “popular” high maintenance type woman for wife will bring me more drama than I care for. I don’t really need the belle of the ball. I probably don’t even care for balls…

        Am I crazy for preferring a 5 -7 sweetheart angel to a top of the range gorgeous spoiled princess?

        Hey, I would’t mind even if her figure wasn’t perfect, you know a little chubby, if she had some of the girlish innocence left in her face, not that worn out hardness you see that many of the so called hotties get probably from riding that carousel too long.

        I view game as natural and necessary, but certain “styles” of the game just don’t suit me. Is there any more dignified “Game” for grown-ups? Rounding the 40s, I have a hard time imagining that the silly getups of “peacocking” or attention-seeking with little magic tricks and the like are the right bait for the prey I have in mind.

        So what should I put on the hook if I want a good wholesome sweetheart? (As opposed to a hottie for just a quick pump and dump?) Many of the lucky victims of the myriad charms of whomever resides in the Chateau (Roissy / Citizen Renegade / Heartiste / etc.) seems like they may have still been innocent and pure of heart. Who knows if they would better be described as flaky and not knowing what they want (future Lizzy Wuertzels perhaps?)

        By the way I love the site, but I can’t be the only one confused by the incoherent aliases and branding. Chateau (Roissy / Citizen Renegade / Heartiste / etc. what is it? Perhaps each of your contributors could take the time to introduce yourselves a little, you know in a cryptic amusing way. How a little mythic background could shape how your audience views you…


      • Read the recent discussion on how to handle long term relationships. Much of that IMO will apply to the older/”nicer” girls. Play the calm, aloof angle more than the peacock. Try not to be obvious in your approach. Keep the discussion subtle but interesting.

        I have found that the best image to project is an outward appearce of a rock – strong, stable and established – with a hidden side that I accidentally reveal then change the subject.

        Avoid strong negs. Even the hotties are aware of their decline, even if they won’t admit it even to themselves. You walk a fine line between light banter/teasing, which they love, and suddenly making them feel too insecure. A little insecurity is ok.

        The toughest part I found is that you can’t ever let up. Once you start relaxing and “being yourself” her sexual attraction will start evaporating. Eventually though it will become second nature and no longer acting. But it will take some time, especially if you have decades of practice doing the wrong thing. But before you start thinking that it is wrong or misleading look at yourself. Do you want a girlfriend/wife who starts to “be herself” and stop taking care of her looks, becoming a total b*tch, etc. or do you want her to work at not letting herself go, work at thinking before bitching (which seems to be VERY difficult for most women), etc? Keeping the attraction alive takes work on both sides part.

        For meeting women my advice is to avoide what you did while younger. This means bars/clubs. Go to arts events/mixers, book discussion groups, even church events. When you go walk in confidently like you are interested and want to be there and don’t care that you are alone. Talk to men and women at these events. Just talking to people is one aspect that IMO can’t be stressed enough. Sitting as a wallflower is not a successful method.

        FWIW the lighter application of game worked in my case even though I am older than you and was an obese 3 at best. It will help you.


      • re: “Am I crazy for preferring a 5 -7 sweetheart angel to a top of the range gorgeous spoiled princess?”

        For LTR or marriage, a 5-7 sweetheart angel beats the gorgeous spoiled princess. The gorgeousness fades faster than you think, and who she is, is what remains.

        I married an angel. After 27 years I still get laid 5 or 6 nights a week, and she gives head on demand. She’s low maintenance, she is an excellent cook, and she deals with the kids. What more can a guy realistically expect?


      • Where do I find such a woman???


      • There’s tons of “methods” out there. Mystery isn’t the only one. Get a account. You don’t need peacocking or magic tricks…. at all.


      • “Editor: This is strong evidence in favor of the Chateau hypothesis that women simply don’t know how their own desire works. Mothers can’t teach their sons that about which they themselves have no conscious apprehension.”

        Some women are wise to the way their desire works and teach their sons how to handle women. Yet such mothers are few and far between, as the ability to do so requires that they engage in a substantial amount of introspection. This is why there are so few accurate accounts of how women really think.

        Ninon de L’Enclos comes to mind….'Enclos

        And in particular, her Letters to the Marquis de Sevigne


  6. That stuff makes me sad, seriously.

    I just read a blog post from a solid eight I see once in a while. It was a whole long sad thing about how ‘anonymous guy’ (me) just stood her up again and how it sucks but she thinks that he cares and just tries to push her buttons. Took me a minute to remember what time she was talking about, and I really had just forgotten. I don’t want to be an asshole. There are just too many cute things in my life, I get easily distracted, and I ALWAYS say not to count on me or have expectations.

    Maybe I’d be a nicer guy if girls I actually liked weren’t shady whores, or maybe if there were just a few less options out there distracting my shit all the time.

    ‘Game’ is entertaining, that’s probably the other problem. When I go out, I’m not trying to get laid, it’s just amusing to talk to cute strangers. Especially when I’m out with friends:


    • It’s interesting that a common reaction to this by men is:
      -That stuff makes me sad, seriously.
      -Sad but true.

      I think men are annoyed by this because assholes don’t impress other men. The asshole phenotype is predictable, sensitive and relatively small-minded. It’s rare the asshole is true leader of the pack.


      • I agree. Ever read Tucker Max’s books? He’s a funny guy, but other men seem kind of annoyed by him. People will be trying to relax and have a good time, and he’ll be standing on the bar, yelling, loudly proclaiming how awesome he is. He’s like my kid brother, always vying for attention. The other thing I find interesting is that in stories involving his friends, they all seem kind of indifferent to him.


      • Yup. Assholes need to be babysat and handled.

        Tucker Max got me into game before it was The Game.


  7. Women are delightful little fluffy puppies to be enjoyed.
    And, just as smart.


  8. on July 25, 2011 at 2:34 pm Corporal Hicks

    Good post for the MGTOWs out there. I mean, really, who really CARES what the dearies think?

    NOT caring what women think, NOT paying attention to them, and instead treating them with pure sang-froid is GOLD.

    Just move on with your life, and do what YOU want to do.

    The Kupcakes will be there. And just make sure they’re foreign Kupcakes.

    Because American women are shot, done, kaput, no good, washed up, stale Kupcakes.


    • Sorry – Another jargon question.


      I gotta find me a glossary.


      • Depends. If you are talking about “The Movement”, or an individual.

        From my post in the previous thread:

        We called it “marching to a different drummer”,
        and it DIDN’T have a “movement”.

        According to the 2000 census, there were 138.1 million males in the US.

        That means 138.1 million ways for men to go their own way (lower case).
        (MGTOW in all caps to signify “The Movement”)

        I’m 48. Never heard about this so-called “movement” until this thread.

        What works for me, may not work for you, due to time, circumstances, etc.

        And vice-versa.

        Lead or follow, but get the hell out of my way.


    • on July 26, 2011 at 8:53 am using acronyms saves whole seconds of my life

      I found a game blog reader on the ground gasping for breath like a fish out of water.
      It turns out he tried to go a whole day without using game blog acronyms like MGTOW.
      I wonder what the fuck MGTOW means.
      It is not defined in
      And when I read comments hinging on acronyms with obscure meanings, I wonder what the fuck the comment is saying.

      No disrespect to you, Corporal Hicks, or any other commenters here.
      But as we all know (from dealing with women), being baffled is damned


      • Google. Google is your friend.


      • >Not pressing Ctrl-T, Ctrl-K, MGTOW, Enter, Looking at the first result, Pressing Ctrl-W and being back where you were in less than literally 10 seconds.


      • Oh for goodness sake people, just give up the answer without having to perform acrobatic Google excercise! MTGOW – Men going their own way. There was THAT so hard. Jeesh. (It sucks that I actually knew the answer)


      • Eh, if he had just asked I would have. Complaining about not knowing any of them is why I gave the answer I did. He will come across this again and if he just typed MTGOW in the google search bar it would be the first entry. If he just asked without whining, he would have been answered.


  9. Agree. I think amused mastery just about sums it up. I think asshole is a little too strong of a word – the weak minded use it “asshole” as a blanket term to describe men that possess mastery of their surroundings.


    • And the stupid use “asshole” to mean men that beat women up, and then come to the conclusion that they need to beat up their girlfriends in order to keep them.

      [Editor: Some hot chicks do love men who beat them. See: Rihanna. She just can’t get enough of those fists of fury.]


      • You are right there, editor. In Africa, where they used to have polygamy (and still do to some extent)women felt unloved if they weren’t given a thorough beating once in a while, much like the belting Rihanna got.


  10. Sad but true.


  11. Sadly, it’s not just girls who don’t understand. I remember being baffled that doing my darnedest to be the most nicest, sincerest, best gosh darn guy I could be, all in hopes of showing a girl how much better I was than her asshole boyfriend, never worked. Never.

    Fortunately, I would later learn.


    • Which is why there should be more red-pill blogs and media out there! Time to wake up men out there!


  12. Naive Chicks Dig Jerks.

    [Editor: Incorrect. Some of the most seasoned veterans of the dating market fall for assholes.]

    When a woman wisens up to the fact that arrogant, good-looking douchebags

    [Good-looking is mostly irrelevant. There is a whole compendium of posts here about chicks who dig jerks, and most of the jerks are average looking, even downright ugly.]

    are overated, she appreciates the qualities in a man she previously overlooked.

    [Why would an arrogant jerk be overrated to begin with? Think about it.]


    • Naive Chicks Dig Jerks. i.e., Young and still attractive girls want men they can’t have for very long.

      When a woman wisens up i.e., When a woman ages and loses her attractive qualities

      …to the fact that arrogant, good-looking douchebags are overated i.e., …to the fact that the hottest and most demanding guys can have young attractive women still, and they’re out of her league now

      …she appreciates the qualities in a man she previously overlooked. i.e., …she becomes desperate and accepts any suitor who will give her the time of day.

      Fixed that all for you.


      • Solid Gold , A.B. Dada, same in Australia too! When they lose their beauty and sex appeal, any guy with a pulse will do.


    • I stand corrected.

      [Editor: More than you think.]

      Naive Chicks Fall for Jerks.

      [“Fall for” = “dig”. Splitting hairs won’t save you.]

      A wise woman knows that jerks are only ‘good time’ guys and does not to show more in affection than he shows in commitment.

      [Funny how all these “wise women” give the supposedly good-time jerks everything they want and the jerks can hardly be bothered to show more than a token display of commitment.]

      She enjoys dating and avoids ‘building up’ the relationship or projecting a future.

      [Are you speaking from experience or wishful thinking?]

      Thereby, she avoids the unnecessary vulnerability and cuts her losses sooner rather than later when the ‘commitment freak out’ comes around.

      [Newsflash: Jerks do most of the dumping, either actively or passively.]


      • on July 25, 2011 at 3:41 pm DiamondEyes

        Why on earth would a jerk be considered a “good-time guy”, unless you were brain damaged? So it’s enjoyable hanging around with an arrogant, mean-spirited asshole?


      • They’re doing it on purpose, and habitually. Obviously it’s doing something for them.


      • For any woman naive or experienced the “asshole” supplies: excitement, challenge, unpredictability, fun, tingles. The nice guy tends to suppress most of the above, if he has any at all, for fear of offending the girl he likes.


      • Why would we keep on smoking or taking alchohol , when we know its positively bad for us? Women, and specially caucasian women get some kind of thrill being with assholes- and they are not prepared to give that up in a hurry-it is in fact some sort of addiction.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 2:19 am Neil Hansen

        Hamster is in serious overdrive…


      • Mr. Editor, It might be slightly different for asian girls like Jenny, even if they are American. They may not be all that attracted to jerks in the first place as much as caucasian girls are.
        In Australia, I find when i go out with a leather jacket or long hair , Asian girls wouldn’t give me the time of the day, but not so with caucasian girls.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 1:52 pm Reactionary_Konkvistador

        There is a pattern that shows up nearly always when comparing different peoples:

        Sub-Saharan Africans on one end
        Europeans somewhere in the middle
        North-East Asians on the other

        True even if they live elsewhere, all that matters is that their ancestors where from those places.


      • Jenny Hao: “Naive Chicks Fall for Jerks.

        A wise woman knows that jerks are only ‘good time’ guys and does not to show more in affection than he shows in commitment.”

        Arnie: “In Australia, I find when i go out with a leather jacket or long hair , Asian girls wouldn’t give me the time of the day, but not so with caucasian girls.”

        My experience is that with the biker look is that Asian women raised in Asian countries are aloof when with their peers but by themselves I was almost beating them off with a stick. And once accepted by their group then were far more open including wanting LTRs.

        From this I have formed the hypothesis that the underlying attraction is the same regardless of culture. Refusing to act on her desires is not wisdom or lack of naivity but merely training.

        Now there probably are advantages to a culture to train the females this way. Which has been mentioned in this site. But it is only training to go against their natural instincts. Not wisdom.


    • @Jenny Hao

      Momma, THERE goes that hamster!


  13. Think that might be an overdramatization of the way women are wired. Most guys don’t practice game, and even among those who do, this level of understanding is rare. Additionally, men have the opportunity for more experience by being more able in many ways to date around. More of a combination of circumstances than some sort of hard-wired survival mechanism in the female brain.

    Plus, it’s ugly for girls to think about this stuff. If a girl is in a relationship with a jerk, she’s got the emotional wool pulled over her eyes. If her friend is in a relationship with a jerk, she’s got more motivation to feel superior than to really try to figure out what’s going on there.


  14. on July 25, 2011 at 2:56 pm fourblindmonkeys

    They have to be delusional in order to carry a child for 9 months.


  15. Chicks dig alphas who lead, who don’t force the women to have to make decisions constantly, who know what they want and make demands for it rather than beg and doormat themselves.

    The problem is that MOST alphas — especially natural ones — are assholes by default. Why? Because they’ve already seen behind the curtain and are that way with EVERYONE. If most guys are betas and need to be led, they’ll be led by an alpha. If most women are sick and tired of doormats, they’re going to want the alpha.

    If most assholes are natural alphas, the correlative theory is that they were always assholes, and realized that they could get more of what they want at a cheaper price by making high demands. Did they become assholes because that’s what the relationship economy set as a price for fulling their needs?

    I’d say so.

    Sidenote: The hottest women in my life — be them friends or lovers — almost require me to be demanding and boisterous and obnoxious and ready to bounce at any moment at the tiniest slight against my demands. If I kowtow or even just give in a little, I can visually see their interest drop.

    This is also why I tend to hate dating hot chicks. If she’s a 9 or higher, I’m the one instantly LJBFing them before they can do it back to me. The gains of LJBFing hot chicks versus fucking them are huge: (1) you get big social proof when you hang out with them (and ignore them), (2) it spins their hamsters constantly, (3) it opens up communities of cute to hot women they’re friends with, (4) it opens doors to social scenes I might otherwise have no noticed (they get invited to all the parties), (5) it’s good for Facebook photos and making other women wonder (hamster spin).

    Hot women also tend to be really lousy lays. Yes, they’re hot, and that helps with the fantasizing with other women, but the fact that they’re so messed up to always need to be disparaged is just too much drama for me. Give me a solid 7.5 gal who loves to serve me and listens to everything I demand.


    • “Give me a solid 7.5 gal who loves to serve me and listens to everything I demand.”

      I understand now. Enjoy that stimulating life you will have.

      [Editor: What stimulates women and men are two different things. So you may stow away your projection.]


      • Just keep spinning that hamster wheel, Jenny Ho. Just keep spinning that hamster wheel.


      • personal reponsibility is big ..but the idea that the once healthy lake is now a polluted swamp is accurate – find a new lake – there is NO helping American culture – to win with most American women (75%+) means a compromise with some aspect of what is actually healthy meaningful way of life for a man- hence player mindset


      • dim sum’s back and
        none the wiser


      • It’s always these semi-smart Asian chicks who doubt.


    • * Hot women also tend to be really lousy lays. Yes, they’re hot, and that helps with the fantasizing with other women, but the fact that they’re so messed up to always need to be disparaged is just too much drama for me…*

      More than agreed, here. I’ve dated at least 2 women that were so hot they literally stopped traffic (leading to one near physical altercation between myself and a carload of frat guys). But they were the worst in bed.

      * Give me a solid 7.5 gal who loves to serve me and listens to everything I demand *

      Again, more than agreed.

      Thanks for your comment; I’ve tried to explain this to my (Beta) friends and they never get it.

      Very glad I’m not alone in the preceding observations.


      • I rarely introduce my women to my circles of friends, unless those women have been LJBF’d by me (which tends to be a permanent move on my part).

        Once a woman meets my friends or family (or other women I’m dating), it puts them above me in their minds. It’s dangerous.

        On the rare occasion that I let a woman come to one of my places (rare, I like to be in control of when we part ways), I’ve had beta friends tell me I can do better than that: “I can’t believe you’re with Lisa when Janet is way hotter.” There’s no option to explain to them that having hot orbiters is good, and having women who know they’re not as hot as I am (not in looks, in social value) means they’re going to bust their asses that much more to dress sexy, wear makeup, shower, and provide for me the needs that I have of them.

        Guys who chase women SOLELY on looks are more likely to be betas than really top tier alphas. If I approach a gorgeous woman, it’s more to challenge myself to see if I can LJBF’s her quickly just as a show of mindfuck talent. Sure, I love beautiful women, but I can’t stand the monotony of their shit testing. Every beautiful woman I’ve dated or LJBF’d has done the EXACT SAME shit testing bullshit over and over and over.

        I don’t facepalm myself, except when that happens. It’s hard to keep my mouth shut in their presence about how non-unique they are, unless I want to spin their hamsters even harder.


      • * I rarely introduce my women to my circles of friends, unless those women have been LJBF’d by me (which tends to be a permanent move on my part).

        Once a woman meets my friends or family (or other women I’m dating), it puts them above me in their minds. It’s dangerous. *

        Funny you say that; just a few months ago, a friend of mine told me he used to hate (for 20 years) how I did/do keep any woman I was/am dating away from my friends and family. Since moving to L.A. (and listening to my advice), he’s had more success with women than before – and now does the same thing.

        * Sure, I love beautiful women, but I can’t stand the monotony of their shit testing. *

        More than agreed. I love them, too, but I have WAY to many hobbies/personal projects to put up with such nonsense on a constant/unending basis.

        I was amazed you even chose the same number I did = 7.5

        My personal reasoning behind the rating is: She’s hot enough to be pleasurable for me but not so hot as to keep me from enjoying her.


  16. It is all part of our biological programming. Plus it really is hard to think objectively about a person who you enjoy having sex with.


  17. Female speak: “Asshole”

    Translation: “Someone who does not let me walk all over him”

    Effect: “Gina tingles”


    • on July 25, 2011 at 3:45 pm DiamondEyes


      Female Speak: Asshole

      Translation: Any man whom my friends, family, parents, and co-workers would think is bad for me.

      Effect: Loving the attention and gossip she gets for making ridiculous decisions


  18. Life as a hot chick must be so boring to approached by so many boring omega drones who just want to cling and serve and cling some more. Being around a jerk must be refreshing. But it’s so mystifying to watch.


    • Why is it mystifying to watch?

      Women want:

      1. To not have to make decisions all the time — they’re biologically designed to get pregnant and raise children and take care of the home.

      2. To feel beautiful. You can’t prove to a woman that she’s pretty, only when she compares herself to other women she thinks are beautiful does she know she’s pretty. When pretty girls flirt with her man, it confirms to her that she herself is pretty.

      3. To feel safe. A man who says no to women (who don’t know any better) are men that the women subconsciously know will protect them.

      4. To “mother” — women want to attempt to fix things, even if there’s nothing broken. A man who a woman’s friends will say is a jerk/asshole/problem is EXACTLY the thing she wants to try to fix. She never will, but she can say she’s trying.

      5. To keep busy — men can sit on the couch with a glass of Scotch and no TV, no radio, no book, no newspaper. We’re content doing nothing if we feel like doing nothing. Women, on the other hand, need to be active constantly or they get bored. A man who doesn’t always take care of her or himself is a perfect target for a woman’s desire to stay busy.

      It’s not mystifying at all, it’s all biologically sound activities.


      • Yes to them all. I hate number 5, by the way. What I would give to be able to just sit sometimes.


      • Work on it, Stingray. Your ability to perform lazy time is directly correlated to how hot the woman is. If she’s a 10, you need to be able to produce a TON of lazy time around her. If she’s a 6, you can actually be Mr. Exciting with her because it’ll make the higher valued women really insane about why you’re so exciting with her and not them.

        Of course, I don’t follow my own advice. I “suffer” from hyperthymic temperament, so I definitely have issues trying to sit on the couch doing nothing.


      • Sorry, A.B.,

        I’m a woman. I was relating on that front. I watch men just sit and I have tried it. I get bored as hell, even with the radio on. I need something to read or do with my hands to be content.


      • I mean, mystifying because men have been lied to their entire lives about this stuff.

        Your 5 points are on it. I think R (or H now) had a post where a woman in love is like a beta-male in providing for her man, and that’s actually sexy where she’s happy to bring you your scotch while engaged in the pursuit of idleness.

        The point of R’s post was self-deception of what women like versus what they say they like. I think group delusions are side-effect of a species that argues by ostracism.


  19. As I was mentioning over at Dalrock’s recently, in my days as a Divorce Lawyer, I always found that it was the prettiest and nicest women who got dumped, and not the fugly bad-tempered ones. Women like bad-boys; they like to be treated badly, because it is more exciting and also they know they do not deserve to be treated well.


  20. “Women truly DO NOT UNDERSTAND why it is they love the types of men they do.”

    No. Women who believe in evo psych do understand this. I always liked assholes and I always tried to analyze why I like them. And evo psych has an explanation which sounds logical to me, so I’m not surprised anymore when I meet an alpha asshole and become totally happy, alive and motivated in his presence.

    [Editor: In a room of 100 single, under-30 (i.e. maximally date-able) women, how many do you believe will be like you?]


    • High T women tend to understand this better (though far from perfectly), in my experience.


    • Thanks for saying that I’m still maximally date-able. (Why wouldn’t you be an asshole and write under-25, like usually? ;-))

      [Editor: Remember, grading is on a curve.]

      Answer: Depends. Sometimes just a few. But among women who like to read pop-psychology books about relationships (=many women, actually) the number would be much higher.

      [I can count on three fingers the number of real life women I’ve met over the years who have solid knowledge of women’s attraction triggers.]


      • [Editor: Remember, grading is on a curve.]

        Why do you want to ruin the mental health of your readers?

        [I can count on three fingers the number of real life women I’ve met over the years who have solid knowledge of women’s attraction triggers.]

        Yes, but in today’s popular books about finding love there really is a lot of evo-psych. Maybe in ten years all women will know these facts. It will be in Cosmo, soon.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 12:09 pm Practical God

        “I can count on three fingers the number of real life women I’ve met over the years who have solid knowledge of women’s attraction triggers.”

        Let me explain why. You come up to a girl and you try to open her and she ignores you or bites your head off or just looks bored, so you think, eh not worth it, more approaches means more poon, moving on. Eventually, you reach some girl who responds positively. Next night you find two more like that. And so on and so forth. After a while, you say, hey, all these women are the same! That’s a self-selecting algorithm. It’s not that only some type of girl always falls for your tricks, it’s that you rigorously reject all other types in your search. You get what you look for. That’s why all these women give you similar drama; you used the same criteria to choose them.

        [Editor: Actually I’m drawing my sample from girlfriends and girl friends. Which is quite extensive.]


    • I agree with Maya. I don’t deny they are attractive.

      I just have more insight into how I’m feeling and not develop an emotional attachment to them.

      It is a game after all, which requires equally matched opponents.


      • This is why some men will use the bait and switch on you. Start out showing you some underbelly, and only later reveal his inner alpha.

        It’s like fishing. First, bait the lure. Then reel her in.

        Even a wary fish can be hooked.


    • on July 25, 2011 at 3:51 pm DiamondEyes

      Ah, so then your radical feminism was nothing but a reaction against your personal knowledge that you are a weakling who lusts after powerful assholes. And you used that rejection of your own desires as a springboard to reshape western society so that women like you were elevated, while feminine, traditional women were denigrated. Just as we all thought. Feminism is a gigantic shit test that ruined western civ.

      May the creator have mercy on your soul for what you have done to us.


      • No. Desiring a powerful asshole is not weakness, it is natural, if not smart, biology.

        Feminism allowed women to be self-sufficient and recognise that assholes will most likely NOT see you as the exception and treat you as the woman of his dreams.

        I am still a traditional woman, but I have worked out how to protect my own interests in the datimg game. That’s feminism.


      • “assholes will most likely NOT see you as the exception and treat you as the woman of his dreams”

        “Woman of his dreams” is a non-sequitor where assholes (men) are concerned. Women of his dreams is the correct phrase.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 4:24 pm DiamondEyes

        Desiring a powerful asshole would only come naturally to the weak and inferior. Powerful men are repelled by powerful women.

        It would all be fine and well if you’d just stop pretending to be equal, while behaving like a helpless child.


      • Powerful men repelled by powerful women? I think Wendi Murdoch would beg to differ.

        It depends how beautiful she is. And if she knows how to play the game.


      • Jenny Hao

        Powerful men repelled by powerful women? I think Wendi Murdoch would beg to differ.

        It depends how beautiful she is. And if she knows how to play the game.

        you vietnamese girls
        always have
        the right ansers


      • Wendy Murdoch is a skank, never saw her as powerful. She broke up the family of the lady who brought her to the USA, and then broke up Murdoch’s family as well. Furthermore Murdoch with his wealth and power could take the pick of the women he liked, even at 70-and I don’t see anything special in Wendi


      • the idea of being self sufficient – not really a it..and slaying the dragon mindset isnt attractive or healthy for women and leads to protect your interests mentality which isn’t very attractive

        the concept of bad boys was a Hollywood creation and pushed by media..

        women used to be attracted to a man who had good character and some level of looks and being a provider it’s all looks and what other people think idea of


      • on July 26, 2011 at 10:49 am Anglo in Abitibi

        I don`t think it was as that women used to be attracted to men with good character who were providers. Their parents were attracted to said men and in pre-sufferage times your parents generally would create a mental “short-list” of who you were allowed to be courted by. I feel that women have always been attracted to said bad boys — at least when they are young enough to compete with other women for their attention.

        The parental approval aspect is the key as older women and men know how to spot and remove assholes.

        A lot of guys here talk about getting a foreign bride. Myself I`m going with a 1st gen Canadian Bengali-Muslim girl (I`m in the runnig for whitest person alive contest). She has great skin, is 95% westernized and needs parental approval so no d-bags allowed. Also just enough pre-marital sex that she appreciates my efforts compared to other guys and reciprocates fabulously. Now that`s she`s in medical school with a bunch of guys who think they`re alphas all I have to be is supportive and not a pencil dick like the rest and she`s mine forever.

        So my advice is to try and find a brown or asian girl who was born here but grew up with a immigrant community. Bonus points if she has a sister or cousin who ran off with a bad-ass and is now living the loser life.


      • cmon the idea of bad boys doesnt exist in may cultures..

        and old saying a worm in a jar of horseradish thinks the whole world is horseradish


      • You are quite correct, the idea of bad boy only exists in western culture and anglo saxon culture more than other. Usually no woman of any other culture will give them the time of the day, except the women at the extremities of those cultures. Feminist ideology has made this mainstream.


      • latin chicks (non-resident undergrad and grad students from central and south america) dig bad boys. the ones i knew needed a man to be able to make them insanely jealous and put them in their place one minute, and then send them flowers and 25 text messages the next. exhausting. even though she expects that balance of bad boy and nice guy all of the nice guy behavior was purely private.


      • “No. Desiring a powerful asshole is not weakness, it is natural, if not smart, biology. ”

        It’s smart biology if you live on the Serengeti plains in a tribal society. It’s also smart if cuckolding a beta is part of your life plan. It’s also smart if you can get the government to pay for your numerous alpha spawn in the form of welfare and housing.

        Desiring betas is smarter if you live in a technologically advanced society where the provision of a beta outweighs alpha genes.

        Thankfully, with over the counter paternity tests available and the ever-nearing collapse of the welfare system due to budget cuts, women will no longer be able to steal from betas to subsidize the genetic legacy of alphas.

        Thank God for hard times.


      • Desire has absolutely nothing to do with being smart. Or being stupid. It simply is, whether we like it or not.


      • Feminism allowed women to be self-sufficient and recognise that assholes will most likely NOT see you as the exception and treat you as the woman of his dreams.

        I am still a traditional woman, but I have worked out how to protect my own interests in the datimg game. That’s feminism.

        And, as a “feminist”, you’re loaded with self-serving contradictions.


      • “Feminism allowed women to be self-sufficient…”

        Ha ha. I always love that lie the women studies scholars tell themselves. As if women suddenly decided a few decades ago that, after a few hundred thousand years of existing at a man’s sufferance, they would now move out and get their own apartment.

        Funny how feminism was a total fucking fail for 10,000 years after agriculture was introduced until, oh, after the industrial revolution and modern mixed economy allowed enough material prospertity for such luxuries.

        But let’s be serious a moment: women are still only living off men’s labors. Seriously. Look around you right now, folks. Look at every material thing in your field of vision. The building. The consumer goods. The food. The water in your faucet. The air conditioning unit blowing that air. All men-built and provided. Female contribution to that material wealth? At most, service-provider to the effort. Put simply: admin help.

        Women are tending kids after getting bullshit degrees (teachers), administering “work” that productive people don’t do (office admin types), doing endless drone tasks interfacing with government (e.g., lawyers, insurance company clerics, etc.). None of that is productive in the sense that it actually adds value. It is stuff that productive people avoid, because their skills are more valuable elsewhere.

        People who conceive of and manage the digging of holes in the ground, taking the stuff from that ground and making things people want add enormous amounts of material prospertity to our lives. Do women or men do that? When was the last time a 5th grade teacher or labor lawyer added that kind of value to our material well-being? They may be worthy of a paycheck for providing a service we can afford to indulge now, but let’s not pretend those people are vital in any way.

        Female work tends to be exactly that: worthy of a paycheck for the service, but not vital.

        If society should stumble in any way, feminism will die about 3 seconds after that, as women scramble to reinstitute a hard regime of patriarchal protection for them and theirs.


      • @Jenny:
        I’ll believe that Feminism was useful when I start to see women doing real work. When I see women start entering the trades. That is, when women’s representation in welding, construction, automotive mechanics, electrical, plumbing, etc. rises from the 0.4% it’s at now to 50%. When I see Feminist groups pushing to equalize the workplace injury and fatality stats from 99% men, ~1% women (+/- 1% margin of error) to around 50% women. When I see ONE woman sanitation worker. Then I might go back to believing that Feminism had some use beyond being a gigantic shit test and money sink. Until that happens …

        This video about sums up my opinion of Feminism. I’d even bet money that it’s the opinion shared by most men.

        Your lifestyle, much as Feminism might tell you otherwise, is not possible without men.


      • video sums up liberals media elites politicians also


      • “Feminism allowed women to be self-sufficient and recognise that assholes will most likely NOT see you as the exception and treat you as the woman of his dreams.”

        No… actually feminism allowed women to raid the public treasury in order to have a (lesser) substitute for men. On average a woman CANNOT take care of herself… not _completely_. A man *can*, and does not require a substitute be provided on the backs of the taxpayers.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 2:22 am Neil Hansen

        No, that is just plain wisdom.


      • “I am still a traditional woman, but I have worked out how to protect my own interests in the datimg game. That’s feminism.”

        I want some of the drugs you’re taking.


      • Radical feminism was a defense mechanism for me. I didn’t want to interact with men. I was afraid of them. (I’m not going to explain again why).

        To reshape western society? Women like me? Not really. In my heart I’ve ALWAYS been very feminine and traditional. I’m a bit aggressive from time to time and I don’t know about my T status, but generally I like to be feminine and I like femininity.

        About the feminism being a giant shit test. Could be. Sounds interesting. Are you able to pass it? 😀


      • “About the feminism being a giant shit test. Could be. Are you able to pass it?”

        Why should I care? I can find a cunt to date that won’t shit test. Count your cats.


      • About the feminism being a giant shit test. Could be. Sounds interesting. Are you able to pass it? 😀

        It’s high time men start shit-testing the likes of ‘women’ like yourself.


      • Maya,

        I’d say that Feminism may be the biggest shit test in recorded history.

        Can I pass it? Yes, I could. The question is, why would I want to?

        I’ve said before, my home will not be a combat arena and that is what Feminism creates.


      • exactly right the fuck on ..Matt.. combat with people that fight the dirtiest and scream foul if you win..


      • I’d say that Feminism may be the biggest shit test in recorded history.

        – Following the stream of consciousness regarding shit tests generated here and at other men’s blogs – yes. That is, going along with their feminist definition of how the world allegedly operates. And it appears to have succeeded for a while considering the vast network of energy put into convincing the most populace subset of men, the ‘betas’ and ‘omegas’, to agree with them by endless badgering and through force of (badgered) state.

        But it also looks comparable to a multi-layered serial soap opera rife with out-of-control false allegations. Which, construed, can be one of the same as a shit test. Their out-sourced shit test is gradually coming about right back to their faces.
        But enough about this. Back to the game.


      • Oh, Matt noticed my post :))

        Hi Matt 🙂

        When you pass the feminism shit test, an angry, aggressive feminist will turn into a sweet and submissive housewife. You just have to be alpha enough.


      • @ maya: Let me guess… all the feminist & misandry media told you that men were the “evil ones”


      • Yes. They did.


      • DE,

        were you talking to me or to Jenny? I don’t know about her radical feminism, so I assumed you were talking to me … Sorry if I was wrong.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 4:27 pm DiamondEyes

        I was talking to you, as you have admitted to being a lifelong radical feminist.
        It looks like Jenny is suffering from the same delusions.

        Like you, she probably realizes what a joke her ideology has been, which is why she is here.


      • “she probably realizes what a joke her ideology has been, which is why she is here”

        It’s called, “Counting kittehs”. LOL


      • I’m just here for the laughs. I have enough men trying to ingratiate themselves. Like the men who keep trying to add me on FB. It gets tedious.

        I can’t tell if DE is a man or a woman.


      • Enjoy it while it lasts, Jen babe.


      • Yes, you will get ten thousand approaches on facebook, and from these select half a dozen, yet somehow all the cat ladies used to get ten thousand approaches also.

        Next time you are at a wedding, observe the reasonably pretty, rather wealthy, thirty six year old lawyers, dressed to kill, on the prowl, and appraising any males, married or otherwise, with hungry eyes. Even though they are no longer getting ten thousand approaches on facebook, they are still perhaps getting a thousand approaches on facebook, yet are organizing birthday parties for their cats.


      • I’m just here for the laughs. I have enough men trying to ingratiate themselves. Like the men who keep trying to add me on FB. It gets tedious.

        So you’re admitting that you’re essentially nothing but an attention whore?


      • No I’m here because you amuse men me. Is it my fault now that YOU CHOOSE to give me attention? Hypocritical prick?


      • Really? Not all men dig oriental chicks-each to their own. I generally dont’ for example, but maybe the men who want to add you are specifically looking for an oriental chick, in the hope that they have different alpha asshole loving characteristics.


      • Two strikes against you already. Waiting for three? (One, you’re Asian. I’m sure your pussy slants the same way as a real one. Two, you’re getting old. Better catch that ship before it sails. Word to the wise).


      • No I’m here because you amuse men me. Is it my fault now that YOU CHOOSE to give me attention? Hypocritical prick? – Jen Ho

        Now your a projecting attention whore.

        The only thing that is amusing is you and your hypocritical contradictions (but you’re a woman, and that is your duplicitous nature, just like Roissy said).


      • Arnie –

        Really? Not all men dig oriental chicks-each to their own. I generally dont’ for example, but maybe the men who want to add you are specifically looking for an oriental chick…,

        It is usually guys like Roissy describes here that typically go for the Asian girls:

        No non-fatty white girlfriend would tolerate such nauseating beta shit for long. His ass would be dumped as soon as the bartender winked at her. Is it any wonder guys like this hone in on Asian girls? I don’t blame them. With the Asian girlfriend, they get to be all the beta they can be, without fear of reprisal. And they don’t have to settle for a fat chick.


  21. The truth of this post is also testified to by the fact that girls and women of ALL ages will spend endless hours discusssing (i.e. castigating) the assholes they know (or know of), but dispense with the “great guys” in about two minutes.


    • re: “girls and women of ALL ages will spend endless hours discusssing (i.e. castigating) the assholes they know”

      I think you’ve hit upon yet another reason why women like assholes: they provide something to talk about for hours with their friends. It’s entertaining.

      The thing a woman really hates is to be in a discussion where other women have juicy anecdotes to share, and she has nothing. Makes her life feel boring.


  22. Note the subtle cruelty to the woman’s cat – something that Roissy has mentioned in previous posts.

    What is with the animal cruelty? It’s not attractive, it’s a predictor of sociopathy (not that women are never attracted to sociopaths).

    [Editor: Dont get yer spanx in a bunch. I love cats. The pen poke to the anus was a gentle tap. The cat probably liked it, if his arched back was any indication.]


    • onorio

      It’s not attractive, it’s a predictor of sociopathy (not that women are never attracted to sociopaths).

      scott peterson would beg to differ, but he hasn’t the time, seeing as how he has 30 bitches lined up for conjugal visits ahead of YOU


    • it means when pussy is near he often opts for anal penetration


  23. American women like hard core assholes because Americans are unbalanced mentally and culturally. The wholesome center has been hollowed out and what you’re left with are the extremes.

    But what is true generally is that women like men who create experiences for them with the more emotional content the better. So many modern men are disinclined towards this because they focus so much on specialization and fitting in to the machine to the exclusion of everything else.

    Men go around zeroing in on attractive women and thinking “I’d bang that hard!”. Women go around waiting for experiences to happen to them and waiting to get swept up. They don’t want to think, so asking them to expound on their natures is a bit incongruous.


    • “Women go around waiting for experiences to happen to them and waiting to get swept up. They don’t want to think, so asking them to expound on their natures is a bit incongruous”

      Perhaps, but the point of the post is: women don’t HAVE to think to expound on their natures. In fact, they seem to actively AVOID thinking when expounding on their nature.


    • “American women like hard core assholes because Americans are unbalanced mentally and culturally.”

      Yes. American women seem to require a higher degree of asshole-ishness than other other cultures.


  24. on July 25, 2011 at 4:09 pm Corporal Hicks

    Deep down, every woman knows very well, no matter what her age, that she is either a vapid, intellectually-retarded ninth-grader, or wants to be one.

    Testosterone is one heluva hormone. Think for a moment what you, as a guy, would feel like, RIGHT NOW, if you had one-tenth of the testosterone you normally have.

    You would feel like shit.

    Which is how women generally feel, unless the pressure is off of them, and a cool funny operator decides to share his amused mastery with them. Then they’re happy.

    THAT”S why they love Alphas, and that’s why you need to be one (or at least do a decent impersonation) to keep your girl happy.


  25. on July 25, 2011 at 4:21 pm Corporal Hicks

    “Men go around zeroing in on attractive women and thinking “I’d bang that hard!”. Women go around waiting for experiences to happen to them and waiting to get swept up. ”

    This is gold. Modernguy, cool insight. Bouncing venues on a date hinges on this very concept. The girl thinks she is on “a whirlwind.”

    “I’m going to SHOW my girl a good time” exists in the vernacular for a good reason.

    Take your next date to the range and teach her to fire a .357 Magnum. Believe me, she will not forget this. Then go catch sharks off the pier at dusk (use shrimp for bait). Get a photo of her with the shark. Then take her out to for drinks. Then grab something to eat. Then go listen to Brazilian music.

    By this juncture, the hamster has more than enough material to run a damn marathon.


  26. This is so true.
    Girls will date assholes and then not acknowledge they are attracted to them

    I try to be a cool guy with boundaries who’s not afraid of busting a girl when I feel like it. I don’t identify with being an asshole and wouldn’t assholish things like cheat on girls.

    I like to think of myself as the good kind of jerk.


    • > “Girls will date assholes and then not acknowledge they are attracted to them”

      It is embarrassing and shaming to fall for an asshole. A woman, if she can take it, will rationalize herself out of the relationship by focusing on the worst things he has done and ignoring everything else. Hopefully, she will then leave.


      She will rationalize herself into the relationship by focusing only on the “nice” things he has does and convince herself of one of two things. 1) She will be able to change him and therefore should stay or 2) any amount of time I get to spend with him will be worth it, no matter what.


  27. ‘There is such a glaring disconnect between the reality of girls chasing after assholes, (something which every man who has lived a day in his life has seen often enough that it has become a well-worn cliche)”

    But there are many guys who think that girls like nice guys (and they behave accordingly). I don’t think EVERY MAN sees this fact about girl’s preferences in “one day”!


    • on July 25, 2011 at 4:58 pm DiamondEyes

      There is a huge difference Maya.

      For most men, every woman that they trust has told them for their entire lives that women desire men who are nice, sensitive, understanding, communicative, etc – in other words BETA.

      Most men believe this, and cling to the lies long past when they should let them go. They want to believe that their mother, sisters, teachers, and female friends would not steer them so horribly wrong.

      By contrast, practically the whole of society tells women that their natural weakness is to fall for aloof bad boys, and that she needs to inhibit those desires because they are self-destructive. Yet, the women choose to ignore all the advice they are given and act like petulant, spoiled children, consequences be damned.


      • “practically the whole of society tells women that their natural weakness is to fall for aloof bad boys, and that she needs to inhibit those desires because they are self-destructive. ”

        No. All media tell us girls that we have a right to have “fun” the way we want. Actually, they almost force us to do this. + No one ever tells us that men actually prefer nice girls. Everyone (including guys) tells us that men like ‘experienced’ chicks.

        “Most men believe this, and cling to the lies long past when they should let them go. They want to believe that their mother, sisters, teachers, and female friends would not steer them so horribly wrong.”

        So do girls. We also are made to believe that men really like, as I said, sexually experienced girls who are also powerful and don’t behave too feminine.


      • Maya, i don’t know wheere you live, but i’m pretty sure that everywhere in the world girls know all too much about male preference towards inexperienced, naive, “untouched” girls. Hence universal phenomena like the antislut defence mechanism.


      • The women in men’s lives did not steer them wrong on purpose. It’s not like all these women got together and said “How funny would it be if we really messed up the men in our lives! Tee Hee!” Women truly do want these things from men. The thing that got left out is that they want these things from alpha men. That is what this post is talking about. Most women truly do not realize what they find attractive in a man. Two men, doing the EXACT same “nice” routine, will get radically different results if one is alpha while doing it.

        A bit of society does tell women to stay away from the bad boy. But attraction is not learned by society. It’s inherent. It is just truly unfortunate that being alpha is not.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 5:41 pm DiamondEyes

        I fully agree, Stingray. At best, it is self-deceptive behavior on the part of women – they know full well that a beta guy acting all sensitive and caring will not turn them on, but they still encourage their sons to be this way.

        They certainly did leave out the part about being an alpha first.

        Add to this the constant portrayal of feminine guys as sex symbols, at least while I grew up (the 80s), and it’s no wonder guys were confused. I mean think of it, Duran Duran, Boy George, Prince, George Michael – these were the guys our high school girlfriends practically worshipped as being soooo sexy. But to the average guy’s perception, these guys were all freakin’ HOMOS. After the truth came out, half of them ARE homos! So we thought, maybe we should really get in touch with our feminine side. If it works for Prince, maybe it will work for me.

        Too bad they forgot to mention that you can get away with being sensitive ONLY if you are first a bad-boy, alpha, millionaire rock star who is lusted after by millions of women and fucks them by the truckload.


      • Meh. Those fem-bot rock stars are transitional sexual totems for young gals. They are only “attracted” to them while they are struggling towards a full acceptance of their female sexuality. The unattainable effeminate male (e.g. Justin Beiber, Duran Duran) allows the tween/teen proto-women to proclaim to themselves and their friends burgeoning sexual desires, but only for objects partially masculine and completely removed from their life.

        A few years later, when the gals are ready for a woman’s sexual maturity, they go for males who will provide it, in spades. Hence those 17-24 year olds who will line up to hump what they consider to be alpha male rock stars, campus athletes, etc. After that period, the gals shift to seeking a stable provider type.

        In their wildest dreams, women hope the alpha males they lust for will become providers ONLY FOR THEM, in the sense that the men will still be 100% alpha in most areas, but still engage in the un-alpha behavior of devotion to her and her offspring. It is this last desire that leads to the lies women tell their sons, brothers and friends about how women want a nice, caring, nuturing man. It is partly true, actually.

        They want a punishing love hammer of an alpha hard-ass to make them quiver, cry and moan…who will also be nice, care and nuturing towards them and their offspring. The women simply leave out the part about how they want the dude to be a punishing love hammer alpha hard-ass, because, well, because they don’t want to admit that they are perfectly okay with their mongol demon lover bringing home the goods to them.


      • Diamond Eyes, female?

        I agree with her (him), but others in here believe that ‘provider-type’ cannot be alpha. They believe the characteristics of alpha and beta are seperate. An alpha can behave beta and get away with it, but not the other way around. An alpha dreads domesitcation and beta embraces it? A beta would rather bang multiple woman like and alpha, but he can’t, right? Even if he is a schlub who bangs left and right, but is a loser in every other aspect of life.

        Alpha will settle for his equal, as will she, both are superior, both are HUGE providers. Yes it is true, the most intelligent, beautiful, kind, intelligent, successful, and wealthy individuals sporting both alpha and beta qualities make up 5% of the population, that leaves 95% of you out of the race.
        It’s difficult for


      • The women in men’s lives that were doing the teaching are also (usually) old enough to have learned their lesson. Letting boys learn from grown men how to be men would solve this problem very quickly.

        Taking a welding class and learning how to cut through steel with a torch did more for me to break the Beta routine than anything else ever could have.


      • “A bit of society does tell women to stay away from the bad boy. But attraction is not learned by society. It’s inherent. It is just truly unfortunate that being alpha is not.”

        Is for natural alphas. The ones all you guys try to emulate with varying degrees of success.


    • Not “in one day”, just one day.

      It may be actually quite early when puberty hits and the young guy is starting noticing: “Why Eva is so into repetent assholes?”

      It’s kind of funny, because some form of amnesia took over him and he doesn’t remember how a few year back how Zdenka was into him when before start of school day he decided to “feel” her and thus both came to class late about 20 minutes. In fact, he got her hamster running so fast that her parents couldn’t but notice and tortured her (psychologically) into revelation of the name of the bad boy asshole that she is enthralled into. Seeing the blur and whizz of the hamster wheel, they saw no recourse but to move almost right away to another end of the city, hoping that the distance would heal the feverish hamster.

      Then Michaela and Dana…

      What happened? Who knows. Some insidious indoctrination, combined with poems of Lord Byron and other romantic sickos of early 19th century, too much TV dramas with people behaving as the mentally unstable author wanted them to, not as people behave.

      So, one day, he just sees it in a plain view.


  28. I don’t believe I like assholes, but I do like aloofness. Once I was schooled in the ways of the men (here), I paid close attention to my triggers of attraction. I like a guy who’s not all that into me. Yet likes me. It’s a hard thing for men to pull off unless they’re naturals. I don’t want the guy to defer to me, make plans around me or feel he has to be in constant contact. In fact I prefer a bit of distance from time to time as it keeps me on my toes. Women would do well to ‘study’ here and take from it what they will. Open mind is important. I reacted with revulsion at first, but stayed the course and learned what men really like and in turn learned a lot about women/myself. Tru stry.

    p.s. Jenny you’re very beautiful!


    • on July 25, 2011 at 5:02 pm DiamondEyes

      Hopefully you understand that aloofness is born from the fact that he is, indeed fucking other women.

      A man who is in love with one woman, and who is not willing to cheat, will be anything but aloof.

      If you women like aloof guys, it’s only fair that you give us a license to screw other women when we feel like it. Otherwise, what you are demanding is impossible – that we remain aloof, yet committed to a monogamous relationship with you.


      • Nah, it can be done and done well. My husband is fantastic at this. It drives me crazy, and yet, it drives me crazy.


      • I am confident my man does not screw around, but I have debated openly about whether or not that would be acceptable by me if it did occur. I believe men need variety and monogamy is stifling to most. That said, I’m not good with sharing and would like to be the variety if you catch my drift.


      • Ummm, I think I misled you. I meant the aloofness drives me crazy. He is excellent at being aloof. My husband doesn’t cheat. Poor guy, even if he wanted to he wouldn’t have time. He works like a dog.

        I’m not sure how I would feel about him cheating. My husband is alpha. It would anger me beyond comprehension but I think it would depend on the circumstances whether or not I would leave him.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 5:46 pm DiamondEyes

        Get it through your thick head – Alphas, by definition, DO CHEAT.

        You are not a special case.

        Your man is not the one alpha in the universe who does not cheat.

        Every single woman on the planet earth would tell a bunch of strangers “my man does not cheat, I’m sure of it”.

        Yeah, those long hours at work…..


      • Get it through your thick head – Alphas, by definition, DO CHEAT.

        I see your contestable point, and in that spirit I’m always skeptical of women’s claim that their man is an alpha. Especially as in the same breath they usually describe beta traits.

        Alphas by definition do cheat? Some argue that he could, but doesn’t necessarily. I lean more towards your view – if you choose not to, then something internal is stopping you. Therefore you can’t. There is no could without do, when it comes to fucking.

        I lean more towards your view that it is more alpha to actually cheat than to not.

        Not that I’m saying it’s better, or more mature, or leads to greater happiness, or a better relationship. Just more consistent with the selfishness of what alpha is all about.


      • @DiamondEyes said: “Get it through your thick head – Alphas, by definition, DO CHEAT.”

        This is bullshit particularly when it comes to married alphas. I am beginning to wonder whether more distinction between natural and fake alphas needs to be made around here? All the fakes are starting to piss me off with their dictation of what is and isn’t alpha. Or perhaps the fake alphas aka game practitioners should just STFU and recognise that they are perpetual students of people they will never be.


      • This is where Game breaks down. Taking on the traits of an Alpha will change a Beta into a good imitation of an Alpha, to the point that they’ll convince women that they’re Alpha long enough to get laid, but they’re still just imitations. Followers. They aren’t leaders. @Matt

        You’re going to love this series on the Myth of the Middle-Class Alpha Male


      • The thing is, with my husband being aloof, he doesn’t do it often and it is not intentional disregard. Like I said before, he works a lot and when he gets home he likes to have some time to himself. He’s had enough and goes and does his thing. I like that about him. There are other things that he needs to take care of for himself. At times, it drives me crazy. But then, like I said, it drives me crazy.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 5:49 pm DiamondEyes

        So Stingray, tell us, since the readers of this blog are largely uninterested in marriage, how would your husband express this magical aloofness of his in the context of picking you up at a bar before you met him?

        You mean, through all these stages of your relationship, he has been tired from work and done his own thing? (BTW that is not the definition of aloofness).


      • DE,

        1. Not friendly or forthcoming; cool and distant.

        I have no idea how he would pick me up at a bar. We met at school. My best guess? He would talk me up. Flash his smile, neg, tease, make interesting conversation and then walk off and hang out with whomever. Another girl or his friends. Another girl would be better. Then come back some time later, after my having watched him the whole time he was gone, and then gotten my number or taken me out. Showing me that it was, at last, me that he finally wanted to spend his alpha time with.

        Yes, he gets home from work pissed off and tired. He is, at times, not in a friendly mood and or forthcoming about anything. He goes into his space and reads, or researched guns, knives, etc.


      • I forgot to add the important part, the aloofness (sorry, under the weather). In a bar situation this would likely happen when I said something stupid (Which was just a matter of time in my college days. BTW, he still does this now). At this point he would find some reason the just blow me off and then walk away. Then remain cool and distant for a time, then come back.

        Like I said, he still does this today. If my timing is bad I will ask him a question (not always stupid) and he will completely ignore it for minutes. He is doing something more important and couldn’t care less in those minutes a whit about my question. Most times he will eventually answer, sometimes he won’t.


      • So, in going back and reading one of my comments, there are plenty of times he does, very intentionally disregard me. It works too. But, for those interested in a LTR he does balance all of this with the ever necessary beta traits.


      • Alphas don’t all cheat. I don’t know where this idea that marriage is a Beta task came from.

        An Alpha is, by definition, THE leader. That’s all. Alphas, in every species, are the males that lead the herd and get the prizes because of it. Betas are the ones that follow the herd and get the alpha’s leftovers.

        An Alpha is not always banging chicks. They’re the ones that command the respect of the people around them. The one that the rest of the men and women turn to for guidance and security. If one man is consistently the one that takes control and leads other men to get a job done, that man is the Alpha.

        Aloofness is born from the fact that a leader doesn’t always take note of every little detail that’s going on because he has other, more important, things to worry about. Or, he’s simply amused at something that doesn’t really mean that much. That could be caused by him having sex with other women, or it could be that he’s trying to decide how to fix his car.

        This is where Game breaks down. Taking on the traits of an Alpha will change a Beta into a good imitation of an Alpha, to the point that they’ll convince women that they’re Alpha long enough to get laid, but they’re still just imitations. Followers. They aren’t leaders.

        An Alpha in a marriage will lead. He will have his, his wife’s and his children’s best interests at heart, but he will still be the leader. The challenge he’ll have to perform, for the rest of his life, is to yield leadership to his wife. That means being the Rock. Roissy at some point even wrote something about being the Rock that her emotional tempests crash against. The leader will tolerate shit storms from his subordinates for awhile, but will be unmoved by them. That’s what leadership is.

        Start to look at why leaders behave the way they do and you’ll see where the traits of a PUA Alpha come from.

        I think that Althol Kay at Married Man Sex Life had the right idea. The man is expected to be the leader in the family. That family’s Alpha. Most women naturally fall into second-in-command; they take control when the Alpha is not around. When this dynamic gets flipped upside-down is when women lose interest in the man. Hell, most of Roissy’s 16 Commandments can be reduced down to “Lead, let her follow, and don’t worry about the outcome”.

        It takes more strength and chutzpah to look at a woman that wants to sleep with you and say, “No, not worth it” then it does to rack up your notch count.


      • Dear God,

        I’m inlove with Matt. Amen….


      • I just re-read my earlier post.

        “The challenge he’ll have to perform, for the rest of his life, is to yield leadership to his wife.” should read “The challenge he’ll have to perform, for the rest of his life, is to NOT yield leadership to his wife.”


      • DiamondEyes,

        Unless I have missed something huge, nowhere have I seen it written that ALL alphas cheat. I have not, either, seen that cheating is part of the definition of being an alpha. If I am wrong, apologies. Then my husband displays the other attributes of being an alpha and not this one. High beta then? Don’t really care one way or another as he is the one who does it for me.


      • You are correct: Not all do. They all have the ability to, which is something else entirely.


      • Wolfie,

        Heh. Yes sir, they do. I have watched my husband turn the eye of other women. It’s fascinating and I will admit, I love it.


      • Exactly. A man is not alpha because he cheats, but because has the ability to cheat with attractive women, whether he does or not. There’s nothing wrong with a guy settling down and building an LTR with a quality woman he enjoys being with. For some reason a few guys get pissed off about it over here.

        Marriage is another story, we all know (in the manosphere anyway), how it’s a bad deal for men and inadvisable.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 9:34 pm DiamondEyes

        yes of course women love a man who “could cheat but doesn’t”.

        now, what kind of man would that be? NOT AN ALPHA. An alpha would not have the moral hangups about cheating, because he is a narcissist. A man who could cheat but doesn’t is a man who doesn’t really exist in the wild, unless he is a religious zealot.

        A man is only as faithful as his options. This is a well-worn Roissyism. If your man is not cheating, he is not the alpha you think he is. Getting married is a beta act, but to get married and not get any on the side, is Omega.


      • You are correct: Not all do. They all have the ability to, which is something else entirely.

        Why deny yourself something that you know you want?

        If it’s to spare the feelings of others, although this is admirable, that is not alpha.

        Alphas are first and foremost selfish.

        The asshole bad boy is attractive BECAUSE he is selfish. Not despite the fact. The attractive trait is what is Alpha.

        The security providing trait, which is attractive in a different, less sexual way, is beta.

        Both are good. If an overall alpha man does not cheat, he is balancing his alpha with his beta.


      • DiamondEyes,

        > “An alpha would not have the moral hangups about cheating, because he is a narcissist. A man who could cheat but doesn’t is a man who doesn’t really exist in the wild,”

        Why does an alpha HAVE to be immoral (yes, I do believe it is immoral to cheat on one’s spouse) to be considered alpha? Also, why is it so hard to believe that out of the millions of marriages in the world, that some of them may be headed by a faithful alpha? I have read here that much of the worst feminism didn’t occur until 1994-1996. Maybe they are more rare after this point because things have drastically changed. But what about before this point in time?

        > “A man is only as faithful as his options.”

        I have read numerous times here and at other blogs how the options out there now for men are abysmal. Maybe some alpha husbands do not cheat because the option they are sticking with is the best one. If they like what they have at home and the wife makes him happy, why would he risk losing that over sex? Now, if he finds something better? Maybe. I think a good wife knows that this would be a possibility with an alpha husband and will work harder to make the option that he is currently sticking with continue to be his best option.

        An 18 year old 10 might be a fun ride, but if she is a vapid twit, it might simply be not worth it.

        > “Getting married is a beta act”

        This is the first time I have heard that and it saddens me that many think so. After having read the manosphere for awhile now I fully understand the apprehension to marry. However, this was not always the case. It was not too long ago that a man was expected to cowboy up and find a good women to marry. It was a way to contribute to society and prove his manhood. Of course children had to be included as well. There are a few men out there who still feel this way and those men are anything but beta.


      • on July 25, 2011 at 5:31 pm Ari Hinkelberger

        I agree. I don’t think it’s possible to be aloof and in love. When a guy falls, he usually falls hard. Natural aloofness is usually a sign that i’m banging a couple other chicks or at a minimum i’m out gaming other women on a regular basis hoping to bang them.


      • Agree with this for sure. To avoid a fatal case of oneitis, and maintain optimal attractiveness/aloofness, you have to have other options or even a “harem” lol.

        Falling too fast (if you’re looking for an LTR) is ironically the best way to completely fail. Seen it in action too many times to doubt it.

        Even women that are sufficiently self aware to know they are being played are willing as long as it is done with skill. (which i’ve seen as well, chick kept yapping about her long lost “playa” boyfriend, the best she ever had etc etc.)


      • on July 26, 2011 at 6:14 am Emma the Emo

        I think it’s sometimes possible to be seemingly aloof and in love. Some people are just terrible at expressing their feelings. It’s not very healthy, but it happens.


      • Hello Emma — I’m adorable enough, all right…..(re: your post on the other article; I ran out of space to reply)….and I’m pretty sure my ego could handle losing….

        “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen! We have quite a match in store for you tonight…..”


      • on July 26, 2011 at 8:35 am Emma the Emo

        Lol! I doubt there are many men who can’t beat a 115lbs girl in a wrestling match. You’ll simply have to let me win :). And even if I manage to defeat you for real, I’m not allowed to sleep with other people.


    • aoefe,

      I checked your website. I see you’re a fan of this imaginary person, Roissy. I don’t think there’s only one author of this blog.


    • p.s. Jenny you’re very beautiful!

      shhh… Jenny’s head is already expanded beyond human comprehension by her endless beta orbiters…

      ie if you’re bi and gaming her, yer probably doing it wrong… not that I know much about lesgame…lol… gonna save that for later..


      • Nah, just calling it as I see it. Women need to tell each other more often. She know’s she’s beautiful too, it’s still nice to be told in my opinion. Men do fall over the pretty ones, even here. Men love to hate on them, but truth is, they still want them. I remember a certain someone a couple years back, I may get moderated so can’t say her name for fear of comment moderation. I gave some men supreme crap for falling all over her because she was an idiot and talked a lot of shit and yet rather than ignore (as per game?), they swarmed around her like flies to s#%t. It was kind of funny until it got nasty.


      • women need to tell each other they are beautiful more?

        jesus that is 90% of the content on Facebook! A bunch of 4’s, 5’s and 6’s telling each other how bloody beautiful they are all day. it’s sick!


      • DiamondEyes you’re ugly aren’t you? Don’t answer, I can tell.


      • I gave some men supreme crap for falling all over her because she was an idiot and talked a lot of shit and yet rather than ignore (as per game?), they swarmed around her like flies to s#%t. It was kind of funny until it got nasty.

        maybe it was a slow news week…


      • Went on for months and nearly decimated this blog. Got very ugly.


  29. exactly who is delusional here?
    “Women truly DO NOT UNDERSTAND why it is they love the types of men they do.”
    Love? by what metric do you use this word? a mentally healthy woman would not call this type of behavior “love”. for what ever reason this woman stays with this man, it isn’t for a healthy reason. she’s confused, lacks self-esteem, or suffered some kind of abuse in her childhood that makes her relive the pain. however, this “asshole” game only works on women like her.. not most women. guys.. you have to understand these women are unhealthy and will make terrible long term partners.. and i know roissy isn’t looking for that and it’s his agenda to present a one sided opinion of the issue. run asshole game on a healthy hot chick and she’ll laugh at you. just remember that if asshole game works.. run like hell after a while and don’t get attached to any woman that enjoys it. she’s sick.


  30. on July 25, 2011 at 4:48 pm Corporal Hicks

    Maya and aoefe –

    since you’re spending so much time here learning about guys (and gosh! yourselves in the process), that doesn’t leave much time to learn how to cook, now does it?

    Or sew? or knit? or bake?

    No – you are the new cybernetic Internet electro-chycks who are forever learning….and never knowing.


    • Sew? Knit? Are these services that you require? What are you, Amish?


    • Um, yes, Corporal Hicks, you’re very right. You can read why I’m here by reading my older posts. But I’ll better leave very soon – it takes too much time :S


  31. For all practical purposes women never had any say in who they’d be wed.

    Only in the last handful of generations — and in the advanced societies — have women had ANY decision power.

    In all primitive societies matings/weddings were decided by the parents — if not the clan chief.

    The wedding night — and honeymoon — imprinted the man’s seed upon the bride. In this way the male is grooming his bride.

    Jiz is loaded with a lot more than just salty seed — it’s laden with a drug cocktail which generates a high in the female.

    During the honeymoon the bride is manfully addicted to her dominating spouse.

    Since, in primitive times, the husband would ALWAYS be 10 years older than her there is no equality in the relationship whatsoever. She is not permitted to resist ANY of his desires. Should she do so — typically she would be killed — normally by her own father or brother. ( Family honor = the word bond of the father when he bargained his daughter away. )

    This genetic desire to mate with dominant clan members is still with us — and is most unlikely to die.

    The worst thing to happen to Western Civilization was the elevation of women into the polling booth. They promptly voted for wishes — neglecting consequences.

    Our genetic makeup is such that women can’t stand being on the same level as their lover/mate/husband.

    A mother’s innate desire to improve things ( the house/ the kids ) has morphed into trying to improve the whole world. Which in turn, has blown up the family — law of unintended consequences.

    The worst consequence of all: left to their own primal instincts females will reverse engineer civilization — that is, reverse the domestication of man, himself — introducing wilding genes ( criminal tendencies ) at a staggering rate.

    This reverse evolution — devolution — proceeds much faster than the path up.


    I have a brainiac niece who should be making babies. She is still trying to find Alpha. Being a 10 & IQ past 160 she’ll never find him in her social circle. This is but one reason why lifting IQs across the whole population is so slow.


    • Like

    • I have a brainiac niece who should be making babies. She is still trying to find Alpha. Being a 10 & IQ past 160 she’ll never find him in her social circle.

      Give me her number, Uncle Pimp. There’s no time to waste.


    • @blert
      The worst thing to happen to Western Civilization was the elevation of women into the polling booth. They promptly voted for wishes — neglecting consequences.



    • Bullshit.

      In the marriage ceremony in Republican Rome, bridge and groom had to publicly consent three times before three different large crowds of witnesses, and when the finally married by the final act of consent, chastely embraced.

      Marriage by consent is ancient since time before history – the barbarians who conquered Rome mostly had marriage by consent.

      By and large, modern rules have made women worse off, not better off. The state decrees rules that are highly favorable to women, and highly unfavorable to men, but the result is much the same as when the state decrees low prices for bread, or a high minimum wage. When the state fixes the price of bread low, there is no bread, and when the state fixes marriage terms oppressive to husbands and fathers, there are few husbands and fathers.


  32. on July 25, 2011 at 4:58 pm Miley Cyrax

    But… but.. but… NAWALT!


    • Why is this a bad thing? Its tru NAWALT!


      • Shut up. Cosi fan tutte.


      • “Nearly all women are like that,” that is. But perhaps there is a special snowflake out there, somewhere, just for meeeee.


      • Glen there is – trust me. Just open your eyes and make sure you are dealing with a sane and emotionally healthy/stable woman. And yes *GASP* there are emotionally stable women who are ATTRACTIVE as well! Imagine that?


      • Sure sure, emotionally stable *and* attractive. I saw one just the other day in the Bermuda Triangle. She was riding a unicorn.


      • From what i can gather here, “Attractive” means to the men here the top 10% of the female population – you know 9’s and 10’s? The other 90% who range in looks & personalities don’t count. Most women are average but have the capacity to look above average by doing a number of things physically. But if you are only lookig for those perfect (9’s and 10’s) and expecting ALL of them to have perfect emotional qualities, then yes, you’d have better luck trying to find a unicorn in the Bermuda Triangle.


      • on July 27, 2011 at 12:18 pm driveallnight

        Wait, I just saw another one! This one was riding a unicorn too, but it wasn’t real. It was just a fake unicorn on a merry-go-round. The merry-go-round was at the carnival, and it had a sign: “Cock Carousel.”


  33. The reason is simple. The Sexy Son Hypothesis. This chick has been treated like a princess by everyone even her own parents since birth. She knows she has high market value. Then she meets a guy who doesn’t give a fuck and treats her like she’s a good five points lower than him.

    So she thinks that either she has vastly overestimated her own value or he’s a god (a 14). She looks around and clearly EVERYONE else treats her like a 9 so he must be a 14. So although she complains about him to let out her stress, she’s never going to leave him. Ever.


  34. on July 25, 2011 at 5:06 pm Corporal Hicks

    Women: they’re all 15 friggin’ years old. ALL of them.


  35. > “I’ve noticed it’s the prettiest girls that go for the biggest assholes. Why do you think that is?”

    I have some things to say about this. To say that a girl’s prettiness is what determines her sexual preference has many implications that are not immediately apparent.

    The one implication I think is being made here is that the woman’s unconscious perception of her own sexual market value drives her to seek out the relationships that will make her feel the most like she actually has that value. The more challenging a relationship is, the more she feels like the amount of work she puts in reflects the amount of value she has.

    Your post emphasizes that a woman’s desires are largely unconscious. But to also state that a girl’s prettiness largely determines her desire is to imply that a pretty girl only grasps unconsciously that she is pretty. This may be what you meant to imply, but it seems more likely you meant that a pretty girl only grasps unconsciously the EFFECT her prettiness has on her own desire. And of course this effect can be very complex.

    [Editor: While it’s true that pretty girls appear to chase after and fall hardest for assholes, in actuality girls of all attractiveness levels love and adore assholes, the difference being that the uglier girls soon learn their place in the sexual market hierarchy and that place is rarely at the seat of a charming jerk’s concubinage. Sour grapes then influences their post hoc rationalizations.
    It is clear that women at some level — conscious or otherwise — apprehend their own degree of prettiness and youth and what it conceivably entitles them to in a mate. This entitlement complex can fluctuate depending on circumstances, sex ratios, and game. A very pretty girl will dismiss the majority of men but will readily switch to self-assessing her worth in the company of a man who makes her question her presumed value, via negs, qualifications, asshole aloofness, infidelity or, in extreme cases, psychological or physical abuse.
    A woman in self-assessment mode cannot help but be intrigued by and attracted to the man who incites that in her. Pretty girls may then learn through experience and continual feedback that their highest sexual highs are with the jerks and assholes, while uglier girls learn that assholes only mean cruel pump and dumps at best, and total rejection at worst, often leaving them feeling so badly that the sexual highs aren’t worth the pain. After some years of this, the uglier girls will tend to sort themselves into dating circles and rhythms that encourage and reinforce mating with dutiful beta herbs while the prettier girls stick with their caddish but exciting jerks.]

    I find it interesting that the subtitle of this blog is, “where pretty lies perish,” as if your goal were to demystify the power pretty girls seem to wield over men, and yet you are constantly appealing to the mystical “ancient” origins of biological female desire.

    [Literary license. Poetry is in my soul man.]

    Let’s go step by step. A girl is pretty. She is frequently an object of male desire. She understands the quantity of these desires and these men as legitimating. She feels they elevate her status in a “sexual market.” She seeks guys who disregard her perception of her own value, because to her mind, this disregard must signal their equal/higher value. To be attached to a man of such value is to increase her own value. But the guy’s actions as an asshole injure her self-esteem. She effectively understands in her unconscious mind that to be brought down is to be built up. The way to increase her sexual market value is to be with someone who totally disregards it.

    Given the absurdity of these contradictions, is it any wonder women are reluctant to consciously acknowledge the things that drive their desire? I would argue that instead of some mystical biological mechanism clouding the perception of women, it is their own repression of the knowledge of the realities of their situation within the sexual market that keeps the nature of their desires locked away in their unconscious mind. What conscious mind would willingly accept such depressingly ironic truths?

    [Men, by and large, accept the depressing truth of their erotic natures, particularly those men who have enough experience to know better. But instead of arguing that the male conscious mind is different or even more evolved than the female conscious mind, it’s more illuminating to posit that women are too psychologically fragile to stare the id monster straight in the face, and that eons of genetic compromise have forged in women a sort of mental tripwire against contemplating their own natures, lest their enlightened cynicism pollute the romantic idealism of men that in part compels the pursuit of women for long term mating.]

    Finally, let’s quickly run through your suggestion that “hot girls love a challenge.” As I stated above, I suspect you were implying that hot girls can make themselves feel like they are an even more attractive object of male desire if they can feel like they are working hard enough to earn what a high status they have. It also seems to me you could have been implying that a very pretty girl can get bored with getting guys easily, so they look for a challenge out of sheer want for excitement. Yet another possibility is that a pretty girl’s reluctance to be labelled a slut drives her to seek out the path of most resistance, so it feels to her like she is not too embarrassingly easy.

    [Most jerks are banging their prospects by date one, not date ten, which is the province of the beta herb.]

    Lots of options. Lots of complex implications of each. I’m getting sick of writing this reply, so I’m just going to address the third one, what some game theorists have called the slut defense. One reason why women might be hesitant to acknowledge that this is what drives their desire is something known as second-order vanity. In the first place, she is vain about being labelled a slut, so she creates a challenge for herself. But then on another level, she is vain about being labelled vain, so she avoids admitting that this is her slut-defense strategy. I’m done.

    [Occam is getting a workout.]


    • way to complex..mental and emotional awareness of either have it or your dont..used to be part of the maturing process was traded for soap operas and sex and the city..


    • I suspect you are over analyzing this, while not necessarily seeing the forest for the trees.

      Universally, women gravitate towards powerful men, which operationally resolves to men who display power. Not assholes per se. At least not for any universally meaningful definition of asshole.

      Only in post civilized societies does the asshole get the girl, as in such places more effective means of demonstrating power are proscribed by law and custom, while means employed by the quintessential asshole are too petty for officialdom to take notice.


  36. I have speculated in the past in this place that the key fact/piece of the puzzle is that the human female sexual on-switch is a very old and archaic module little changed from the kind present in their fore-mothers in the animal kingdom. And this type of module does not have programming to deal with the matter of “Is he the type that will stick around afterwards and protect me from wolves and help with the dishes?”
    Female mice in heat did not need that complex a program because they were going to be on their own regardless. A brutish bull-mouse with the blood of a recent rival all over its face would appear as an entirely suitable Mr. Right. It was about his genes .. full stop. Then its going separate ways. That is nature, 99% of the time. The number of mammals that utilize any form of male investment for child rearing is quite small and cuckholry is common..
    Since human females have uniquely needed male investment,due to their extravagant pregnancy related dependencies, they have not (until recently) been able to pay attention to their true instincts. Survival meant disregarding them so completely they were better off not even being conscious of them.


    • really interesting – question becomes a HUMAN one with our unique characteristics in the animal kingdom ..self awareness, no automatic code of values..ect

      at what point do we (society) demand of women their best instead of catering to their worst..? and does that imply an eventual self awareness of the best women that eventually trickles down..or do we get continual lowest common denominator ..all the bad ..with none of the good


    • I like this explanation far better than the psychological ones.

      This is a mechanical issue, not a socializing issue. The female brain originally had an attractiveness nodule, that later got an addon module. The original module was for high status males, the addon module says, yes, but, we also need a provider. The original module is wired into the circuit with a diode. Commands can go out, but self reflection can not go in.

      This is a hardware issue, gentlemen, not a psychological or social issue.


    • One episode of “Meerkat Manor” taught me all I need to know about the sexual programming of social mammals (like humans).

      The males are always sneaking away to neighboring rival Meerkat clans to have furtive sex with desirable females. The females are always on the lookout for strange and attractive males from rival groups with whom to have clandestine sex. The males of each group guard against male interlopers from other groups as their own females engage in furtive sex with the interlopers.

      Kinda like humans.


      • ha that’s funny, I too was amused by the human clan parallels reflected on Meerkat Manor. The most desirable young female usually sneaks off to fuck the baddest boy from the rival clan. Then she gets preggers and is ostracized from her main clan. From there all she can do is run away with the bad boy and try to start their own new clan, because no one else will have them.


    • If male investment in children is beneficial, evolution would quickly have weeded out females without the ability to discern between a male who would invest, and one who wouldn’t.

      In mice, male investment is simply not particularly beneficial, as their behavior is much closer to being hardwired.

      Attempting to learn timeless, historical truths about human mating behavior by studying the freakshow that is post civilized America, is bound to be futile. Much preferable to instead look at the few tens of thousand years that preceded it; or even at geographic locations where society has not yet degenerated to the extent ours have.


  37. Assholes challenges a weak, lacking in self-awareness, low-esteem woman’s frail ego, making her resist and deny her own sense of rational judgement to leave, instead she stays with determination to demonstrate and prove to herself by staying the existence of her worthiness…. a quality about herself that she is uncertain of.


    • on July 26, 2011 at 2:29 am Neil Hansen



    • 3 reasons why she stays….:

      The predictability of an asshole out weigh the uncertainties of the unknown.

      The illusion of confidence an asshole exudes creates a sense of safety for the woman with the frail sense of self.

      It’s the template….. unfortunately.


  38. on July 25, 2011 at 5:22 pm Mr.Banana'z

    This all goes back to that post you made about breaking the rules roissy. Humans, especially females subconsciously assume one who breaks rules and acts like a asshole is higher status. In a woman’s head it goes something like this – “Wow this guy acts like a asshole and gets away with it, he must have high status and good genes if he’s acting this way.” We accept the images people present to us until too much evidence stacks up to prove otherwise.

    Assholes simply embrace one of the most important rules of power. Act like a king to be treated like one.


  39. Chicks are just dumb. Everything worthwhile in civilization has been built by men.

    Ancient men figured this out and modern men, due to feminism, forgot it.

    Men and Women are only equal morally and spiritually. In just about every other way that matters men are superior and should learn to act like it.

    in the chain of being: animals – children – women – men.

    They are to be taken more seriously than children, but not much more and under no circumstances are they to be treated like men. For those who do so only chaos will be the result.

    Chicks dig assholes because assholes understand the true chain of being.


  40. @jack “Sew? Knit? Are these services that you require? What are you, Amish?”

    That one had me laughing out loud for real!

    @ Colonol Klink “No – you are the new cybernetic Internet electro-chycks who are forever learning….and never knowing.”

    Weird that being able to *gasp* type means we can’t cook, bake, sew or knit. I’d admit that I do all of those things but I’m worried you’ll think I’m perfect for you.


    • I like your eyes and hair…but I’m worried that you don’t go to the gym enough. Your ability to laugh at my sense of humor is plus though.


      • I have upped my gym time recently, I admitted to myself I could be hotter for my fellow. I do have a wicked sense of humor ( for a girl). 😉


      • Look at you… extra time at the gym and gender psychology lessons from Roissy… full-on Martial (marital?) Arts training.


      • And yet, here she is, qualifying herself to the first asshole that comes along.


      • Isn’t this what the post is about? Qualifying to assholes? Actually I have mine already, don’t need another one. 🙂 (Ladies, he’s actually a very great guy and not at all typical asshole). I love coming here for sport if you really wanna know. As for marriage material. Don’t want to get married – true story. As far as the gym, I DO believe a man is attracted to what he sees and it’s our duty to look our best for our man, if we want to keep it hot in the bedroom. And since I’m selfish (I’m a girl), I do, so hot it is to keep him coming back for more. (let the heads roll about on the floor ladies and gentleman). Please know you’re all allowed to have a sense of humour…just sayin’.


      • re: no marriage… Aoefe, let me guess, you’re financially independent and make more money than your beau.


      • Jack, I’ve just started my own company, going into my life savings to float it, not independently wealthy I’m afraid. Just don’t believe in marriage.


  41. Do you think that women like assholes for assholes, or do they just tend to like men with assholish tendencies because it signals to the woman that the man is of a higher status?

    [Editor: Both. This is one of those chicken-egg arguments, tautological almost in nature, that trips people up. Status without status markers is nothing; it’s a disembodied abstraction. Women don’t love disembodied abstractions; what they love are high status MEN, and they use markers to judge that status. Aloof asshole behavior is a major marker of high status to women, and the behavior itself is what revs their vaginas to squirt loving goodness in the jerk’s general direction.
    Other markers of high status include but are not limited to:
    good looks (until proven otherwise, which to the chagrin of many good-looking beta males can happen within seconds of meeting a woman)
    and of course, game.]

    In high school, most girls grovel at the feet of the Queen Bee hot popular girl and treat the less popular girls with disdain. If women generally want to be with men who are of a higher status than themselves, then in a woman’s mind, the assholish, dismissive behavior from a guy signals to the woman that the man is higher status, even if he isn’t. It’s an easy way to fake status. So, if a guy is some attractive 6’3″ muscley intellectual Super Alpha type, would he not have to be an asshole to attract women? He just needs to refrain from being passive and girly, and he will be successful…right? Or would women want to be treated like shit from the Super Alpha too?

    Just to let you know, I am a woman, so judge my question accordingly. I am just legitimately curious


    • on July 25, 2011 at 5:44 pm laconophile

      No woman wants to be treated like shit.

      They want the men who treat them like shit to treat them nicely.*

      *But, by and large, they want the men who already treat them nicely to disappear.


    • not all cultures have these it is being developed

      which culture has had 60 years of advertising beamed in?

      and for what goal… ? To influence your behavior..

      To analyze from the perspective of the dogs tail ..doesn’t tell much what motivates the dog


    • “He just needs to refrain from being passive and girly, and he will be successful…right? Or would women want to be treated like shit from the Super Alpha too?”

      Just the first. If he used asshole game he could overgame the chick. Basically, she would give up hope of netting him because his market value is far too high.


  42. A guy analyzes female instincts and explains it. A few women begrudgingly admit that he is right but they personally know better than to follow them.
    Does it not strike one as odd and interesting that no woman in the recorded history of our species has ever honestly explained what their sexual instincts really are? No, that takes a man who has studied women to do that.
    The thing speaks for itself.


    • on July 25, 2011 at 7:08 pm DiamondEyes

      This has always baffled me. In the past, I have wasted so much time trying to get women to tell me what they wanted from men, what really made them attracted to men. The answers I got were so absurd, so wishy-washy, so obviously phony, I had to wonder: are women natural liars, or are they incredibly ignorant about their own minds and bodies?


      • “I had to wonder: are women natural liars”

        Grandad always said, “Never trust something that bleeds for a week & doesn’t die”.


      • are women natural liars, or are they incredibly ignorant about their own minds and bodies?



  43. heartiste:

    I have a problem. Your premise on chicks digging asshole behavior makes a lot of sense… But in practice, I haven’t been able to achieve much success applying your lessons. I’ve tried all flavors of asshole game, from the mild (aloof) version you preach here, to the hardcore, flat-out abusive kind. The reaction is almost always total indifference to the former, and annoyance/anger at the latter. What is it I’m doing wrong?

    [Editor: Assuming you’re not a troll, we’ll need to know a few things.
    What do the girls you are hitting on look like?
    What kind of game are you running? Give a specific example of what you say to a girl you just met.
    Describe the hardcore abuse you have dished out to girls.
    What kind of girls did you use this hardcore abuse on? First dates? Girlfriends? 10s? 2s?

    Fact is, when a beta trying to get better with women has had no success, I usually counsel him to drop some asshole game straight up. There’s often no faster way to turn around a chick from indifference to intrigue. Asshole game may not be ideal, but it works in a pinch.]


  44. Feminism allowed women to be self-sufficient and recognise that assholes will most likely NOT see you as the exception and treat you as the woman of his dreams.

    I am still a traditional woman, but I have worked out how to protect my own interests in the datimg game. That’s feminism.

    And, as a “feminist”, you’re loaded with (self-serving) contradictions.


  45. “Cradling a tumbler of scotch, I asked, “How was ladies’ night with the girls? Any juicy gossip?”

    Hysterical line. Yep, that’s what most Alpha men do – ask their gfs about the latest juicy gossip.

    [Editor: Whatcanisay? I’m a sucker for scandal.]


    • I like hearing about human folly, mendacity and tragedy. Hearing about the antics of women in today’s society is almost as good as watching one of the Bard’s works.


    • I don’t think “most” Alpha men write blogs that help out other men, either. Nor are they so adept at analyzing the human psyche from both sides for real, practical results-oriented advice. Heartiste is the Alpha of Hearts.


  46. on July 25, 2011 at 7:14 pm Corporal Hicks

    Man, this board would be a heluva lot better if we could clean out the bull-dykes who insist they sew, bake, and knit.

    Any Anglosphere Kupcake who graduated from public schools has no idea how to boil water.


  47. Oh and most women DO UNDERSTAND. They just choose to ignore the voice in their head. People like to take bigger risks for what they think will give bigger rewards, in this case, a suitable mating partner.


  48. on July 25, 2011 at 7:19 pm Corporal Hicks

    “Feminism allowed women to be self-sufficient and recognise that assholes will most likely NOT see you as the exception and treat you as the woman of his dreams.

    I am still a traditional woman, but I have worked out how to protect my own interests in the datimg game. That’s feminism.”

    You are delusional. The essence of feminity is submissiveness. Guys will turn the world upside down for the sweet girl who submits to him, cares from him, and LOVES him.

    You are a cold, calculating business-culture end-product that seeks to protect its own interests in the dating game. You are in La-la land thinking a man will consider any woman from today’s disaster culture to be a “dream woman.”


    • on July 26, 2011 at 6:36 am Edmund Burke

      A dream woman; Jeannie, from I Dream of Jeannie.
      All you civilisation destroying bitches ought to watch that show and learn.


      • All you civilisation destroying bitches ought to watch that show and learn.

        – They may already have watched that show and learned. ‘Jeannie’ frequently had nice guy ‘Larry’ running around in circles.
        As a kid watching that show I often wondered why Larry didn’t spend more time removing those lace knickers from Jeannie (as I had imagined doing).


  49. on July 25, 2011 at 7:31 pm DiamondEyes

    Women have been running a hell of a con game on men. As you see here, even the self-identified feminists fully admit to being enthralled with assholes. It is only the reason that they can’t agree on.

    If they admitted in public the true nature of their attraction, feminism would evaporate overnight. Women would no longer have the moral high ground or the claim of being the fairer sex. It is those pretty lies that have compelled beta men to slave away in service to these manipulative whores.

    Women lose all the unearned privilege they have extracted from society, if they admit that they are base, ignorant, greedy, selfish bitches, out for cheap thrills with thugs.


  50. I’m sure there was something to be gained from this post but I’m still laughing about the cat part.


  51. I believe there is no better explanation of what women need than in this excerpt:

    “And within a committed relationship, the crucial stimulus of being desired decreases considerably, not only because the woman’s partner loses a degree of interest but also, more important, because the woman feels that her partner is trapped, that a choice — the choosing of her — is no longer being carried out.”

    It comes from an article titled “What do Women Want” written by Daniel Bergner and is backed by research done at Queen’s University in Ontario Canada.

    Thus, you cannot be Alpha in the woman’s eyes unless you are either cheating or are able to easily. If she feels she “has you 100%” (i.e. trapped), you are done. This is why marriage and kids make aloofness and Alphaness very difficult.


    • Getting married is admitting subconsciously to her brain that you aren’t a alpha. She interprets it as you only marrying her because you had no other options and aren’t desired by other women. Basically she takes your kindness as weakness. The solution? Cheat or atleast trick her into thinking your cheating. Consciously she will seem mad, but deep down shell thank you for it.


  52. Q: Why do women like jerks who treat them like shit instead of loving, faithful men (who arent “losers”!)?

    Q: Why do men like hot sluts instead of loving, devoted women (who aren’t fat or hideous!)?

    [Editor: False premise. This is a feminist meme attempting to divert uncomfortable attention from the female predilection for assholes by asserting an imaginary equivalence with a supposed urge by men to date only hot slutty bitches. The truth is that most men like hot, loving, devoted women. Very few men, betas or alphas, prefer the long term companionship of disloyal, bitchy sluts.]

    A: Most people are stupid, emotionally immature idiots who dont believe in true love, marriage, and family (low values)!!

    [Men and women equally believe in “true love”, but the two sexes have radically different criteria in reaching it.]


  53. Being in asshole works. However, I wouldn’t say you need to be an asshole to get girls, too many men new to pick up assume this off the bat and then go nuts with “negs” and wonder why their “negs” don’t work (they’re not so much negs as they are being an ass). I guess that’s progress for many men, but I wouldn’t aim to be an asshole at all. Think of it like this: Be a good guy, not a nice guy. Nice guy’s finish last. Good guys can be assholes sometimes, but they’re never nice guys. Let me give an example: Many chicks really like Russel Crowe in Gladiator. Was he an asshole? No. Was a he a nice guy? No. He was the good guy, but he was also masculine. Masculine qualities ensconce themselves well in an asshole and women are attracted to that. But, if you can separate the masculine from the asshole, you’re in even better shape. Although, it probably is better to lean towards the ass side than the nice guy side in a pinch.

    Just some advice to nice guys under 30: Consider the military if you want to be forced to grow some balls. Stop playing Call of Duty and learn to be a badass in your own right.


    • on July 25, 2011 at 11:30 pm Anonymus Maximus

      I joined the military right out of high school back in the 90s. Of course I was a pretty classic beta, but a strange thing happened in the military. I was put in charge of an honor guard regiment and I was leading other troops, calling commands military style, etc.

      Being in charge of other people in the military ironed out some of my beta qualities but I was still pretty clueless. I got sort of well known for my command voice and one time at a party a girl came up to me and was like “When you call commands you sound like Vin Diesel. And Vin Diesel is hot”. I was totally baffled by this comment (and other comments like it), but of course this was all before game.


      • Yeah, women love leaders of men. That’s inherently alpha. Props on the military service man, even if you’re British or something – respect to ya. The military is great for ironing out beta qualities. If I am blessed with a son or sons, they’re all going into the military, I have 0 plans of making a “college fund.” Although I don’t mind them going to college to be an officer.


    • Go to an environment with few if any hot women but where bullets are being shot at you instead to get laid? Seems like a pretty backward approach to getting laid…


      • Nupi, ignore my suggestion, because with your reading comprehension skills you’re unlikely to pass the entrance exam. I never said joining the military was at all an approach to getting laid. Although hajji women can be really hot, you know. I still send letters back and forth to two of them. Not to mention the Thai women you might meet if you’re a Marine, or the Australians, or the girls around Okinawa. Don’t get stationed in Guam though, which is where all the guys from Okinawa may be winding up soon: People are some of the best in the world, but the Samoan women are tall and big boned by nature – hard to find man of them hot.


  54. Feminism is a long con on Women.

    By the time a woman figures out her priorities were entirely wrong…

    I is too late.

    ( c.f. ex-Feminist, age 36, crying out to the web… )


  55. Women are idiots.Thats why theyre called women.


  56. Jen

    If most women really do understand their own instincts then most women have thus far been amazingly dishonest – insofaras they never tell the truth about it unless virtually cornered by a guy on a blog. In real life? Never.


    • I genuinely dont think they understand what they are attracted to, but even if they did they would never admit it. Why? Because they really cant tell the difference between a fake alpha using game and a genuine alpha. It’s to their best interest to keep the truth hidden from betas. A beta with good game still doesn’t have genes as good as a real alpha.

      So for women to get pregnant with a beta’s kid when they thought they had a alpha is rather deceptive, but fair game. No different than women using make up and plastic surgery to trick men into thinking they are real 10’s


      • And what “being an alpha” has to do with genes, really…

        Most of today’s “Alpha Behavior” is leaned, it isn’t that you are born alpha or beta, but due to your education, and social skills (which are learned, mostly, by observing parents as an infant).

        Although there are different attributes like higher testoterone levels, being stronger, higher etc, most of “being an alpha” is just a way of being.


  57. Bob is right! Masculine doesnt mean “alpha” asshole/cheater! Guys thinking that is the same as women thinking feminine=stupid/doormat (as feminists often do)


  58. And perhaps this is one reason that womyn were historically kept under control in bygone days? The patriarchs realized that if you let womyn follow their (irratoinal, emotional) desires, they would make the stupidest possible choices in men as mates, leading to the disintegration of the tribe? But in these more civilized days of womyn’s lib, we would not have such things as rampant single motherhood, or females lining up for death row inmates, or hordes of frustrated beta and lower caste males, or whatever…


    • I think this is why also. The men of the past saw what happens when you let women chase after the alpha men they want. First off, all the women only go for a few alphas leaving many frustrated betas. Betas become rather violent when they are denied access to women, and the fact that you have a surplus of alpha’s who are naturally aggressive being born makes for a very tribal violent society.

      It’s either this violent society or you make each sex sacrifice their sexual freedom for a peaceful society where you can raise your children. Sure women didn’t get to fuck alphas every night, but men didn’t get to be players and chase women each night.


  59. If a woman was consciously aware of her own sexual desires, it would be a lot easier for other people to figure out what her real sexual desires were. This would profoundly disadvantage that woman.

    If women consciously knew they desired assholes, men would know, and would be bigger assholes.


    • I think, too, that women don’t always want assholes. The switch to betas isn’t simply because they have aged out of the SMP. It is also because they genuinely have an instinct to choose beta providers for the raising part. They just want the assholes for their sperm, so they can have alpha sons. So to say they don’t know what they want is a huge understatement.


  60. hence arranged marriages.


  61. And perhaps this is one reason that womyn were historically kept under control in bygone days? C’mon man, you think that for 5000 years humans were behaving rationally (except during the peak phases of a civilization) and now, in the Age of Science, Enlightenment and Reason, people have gone potty? No no no, women were kept down because for the first 5000 years of recorded history, men were meanies. This time it’s different.


    • Women were not kept down for recorded history. Women’s liberation comes and goes, and when it comes, the collapse of civilization follows shortly afterwards. Often women’s liberation is followed by conquest by outsiders, who enslave the women and kill the men. See “Sex and Culture” for a survey of the role of women.

      Unwin has a Freudian theory explaining this, but we now know Freud is bullshit. An alternative theory that I find more plausible is that women’s liberation reduces male investment in children, and thus reduces investment in the future, so the culture fails to propagate itself memetically, culturally, or economically.


    • on July 26, 2011 at 3:20 pm Reactionary_Konkvistador

      They weren’t being rational, but that dosen’t mean they weren’t right. See this to realize why:

      “There’s a very interesting book – I don’t know if anybody here’s read it – called ‘Man on Earth’ by an anthropologist who use to be at Cambridge, called John Reader, in which he describes the way that… I’m going to back up a little bit and tell you about the whole book. It’s a series of studies of different cultures in the world that have developed within somewhat isolated circumstances, either on islands or in a mountain valley or wherever, so it’s possible to treat them to a certain extent as a test-tube case. You see therefore exactly the degree to which their environment and their immediate circumstances has affected the way in which their culture has arisen. It’s a fascinating series of studies. The one I have in mind at the moment is one that describes the culture and economy of Bali, which is a small, very crowded island that subsists on rice. Now, rice is an incredibly efficient food and you can grow an awful lot in a relatively small space, but it’s hugely labour intensive and requires a lot of very, very precise co-operation amongst the people there, particularly when you have a large population on a small island needing to bring its harvest in. People now looking at the way in which rice agriculture works in Bali are rather puzzled by it because it is intensely religious. The society of Bali is such that religion permeates every single aspect of it and everybody in that culture is very, very carefully defined in terms of who they are, what their status is and what their role in life is. It’s all defined by the church; they have very peculiar calendars and a very peculiar set of customs and rituals, which are precisely defined and, oddly enough, they are fantastically good at being very, very productive with their rice harvest. In the 70s, people came in and noticed that the rice harvest was determined by the temple calendar. It seemed to be totally nonsensical, so they said, ‘Get rid of all this, we can help you make your rice harvest much, much more productive than even you’re, very successfully, doing at the moment. Use these pesticides, use this calendar, do this, that and the other’. So they started and for two or three years the rice production went up enormously, but the whole predator/prey/pest balance went completely out of kilter. Very shortly, the rice harvest plummeted again and the Balinese said, ‘Screw it, we’re going back to the temple calendar!’ and they reinstated what was there before and it all worked again absolutely perfectly. It’s all very well to say that basing the rice harvest on something as irrational and meaningless as a religion is stupid – they should be able to work it out more logically than that, but they might just as well say to us, ‘Your culture and society works on the basis of money and that’s a fiction, so why don’t you get rid of it and just co-operate with each other’ – we know it’s not going to work! “- Douglas Adams

      All else being equal, societies that had Gods with maladaptive rules got slaughtered, forcefully converted or just plain out competed.


  62. on July 25, 2011 at 9:24 pm From the can

    Totally unrelated to anything: Have questions about how to talk to women? Look no further than this clip—

    Clear, crisp speech, confident, expressive body language, cliff-hangers, descriptive language, funny as fuck, DHVs all over the place without sounding douchey, big-ass pants poop…. wait. It shows how to talk to women, not what to say.


  63. #2. F yea. Woman are the new provider. I know a LOT of men who are living off the girlfriend or wife. Wives making 6 figures (sometimes mutli-6-figs), while the guy was a retail job loser who married rich, and has bogus job, barely even a career. LOTS of men are straight up GOLDDIGGERS today. In other families, they’d be on the street (or a 1BR apt) if not for the wife’s serious income.
    Women more valuable beyond sex?

    You better fucking believe it. These guys are god damn LIVING OFF these women. Losers who have quadrupled their social status b/c the women are more educated, and earn more than men. Sex? Nigga please. These guys would be married to these chicks even if their dicks were cut off. The female is the god damned SUPPORT SYSTEM for the entire lifestyle..

    These fucking losers would be living in 1BR apts if not for leeching off their wives and girlfriends. Instead they live in 4BR Colonial houses in the elite part of the country, exotic vacations every year, country club memberships, $30k private schools for their 6 year olds, and $75k bathroom renovations…..all b/c the WIFE IS PAYING THE BILLS.

    Men are marrying UP in fucking droves. Sex? Almost beyond the point. Wake the fuck up. Women marry up in status, except when they CANT. I’m a hardcore bachelor, but fuck all mightly, I see a lot of guys getting some seriously fucking free rides, while I bust out a living, working on the weekends, and these bitches are at their backyard pool, and driving the wife’s BMW.

    Dude,. the guys I know who have pulled this off are rubbing elbows with serious power players. People you’ll never even know EXIST. You think you’re all that with your bullshit $150k cubicle job? Trust me, these women are providing the fucking LIFE for these guy. Only a dumb fuck would think women are only good for sex. I know fucking radiologist chicks who have 2000 sq foot penthouses in NYC pulling down $800k+. They OWN this SHIT.


  64. on July 25, 2011 at 9:32 pm fourblindmonkeys

    You have to be delusional in order to carry a child for 9 months.


    • A mother is ON DRUGS when she is carrying.

      After delivery the drug supply is cut off. This triggers drug withdrawal symptoms — normally termed postpartum depression.

      The ‘boost’ kicks in within an hour of the zygote hitting the uterus lining.

      It’s so strong that every woman recognizes it upon their second child.

      Of course, it’s the only way for a woman to win the genetic battle, so it’s hardwired into the DNA.

      BTW, birth is the bitch — not pregnancy. Until modern times mothers faced serious risk of death. Think of the fictive Cartwright family.


  65. on July 25, 2011 at 9:34 pm Superfly Jimmy Snuka

    Sorry for not being on topic. Anyone want to tell me how to respond to these?

    –A friend’s girlfriend says to me, “Before I thought you were kind of handsome, but now that I’ve been drinking you look ugly.”

    This was so odd that I don’t even care about a witty response, but what exactly is she doing with that question? Her boyfriend is a friend so I’m not even interested in “getting her” but I am interested in what this is all about.

    –Two girls ask if you’ve ever had a threesome?

    I imagine there’s a number of ways you could respond to this, but if anyone knows some really good ones…

    Thanks in advance.


    • Without any context, the ugly comment seems like a mild shit test. You start to seem interesting in her eyes so her ego starts lobbing rounds at you to knock you back down a couple notches. To counter, realize that she just called you ugly- its not odd, its fucking insulting -are you going to take that shit??- and either have a witty comeback like, “whoa reverse beer goggles, that a new one” or stomp it out completely with “fuck you” and give her cold shoulder for a while, strike up a convo with someone nearby, etc

      “Ever had a threesome?” –stupid shit test/ chick stupidity a la “Does my ass look big?” and also “you must be a player.” They probably interested but want to draw you out into acting loser way early. Don’t answer it. Don’t play by her script.

      – “Sure I had one earlier today. Burger, fries and a drink. That a threesome isn’t it?”
      -“Nope, I don’t have one kid, much less triplets.”
      -“Heads I answer that question, tails you answer.”

      Any of these make you in control and her entering your reality/ mindset. I suspect you are weak bringing conversation to the table. Realize that when you do that girls say all kinds of shit- its like a car with no driver, it goes anywhere. But in both cases, they both reveal that they are thinking about you being attractive/sexual. You win. Just assume you are going to fuck them later and have to fill the time with chickenshit.


    • 1. Your not very feminine…are you

      2. Yes


  66. Burton,

    You are exactly correct. That is why feminism is a farce. Not only contrary to nature, but to civilization itself.

    The Ancients figured this out. Chicks are dumb and need to be controlled. If not …… chaos ensues.

    See: The Bible: Genesis: all allegory about this very same point.

    God: “I give you paradise and dominion over everything forever ….. do whatever you want just don’t touch that one fruit over there”

    Adam:(male): I get paradise and dominion over everything so long as I don’t touch that fruit over there……Sounds like a good deal. Reasonable, Rational, Under control, ability to control impulse and understand consequence.

    Eve: (female): I get paradise and dominion over everything forever….so long as don’t touch that one fruit over there ………wait ? why can’t I have that one fruit even though I can have all the others ???…….I can’t be happy unless I have that one fruit ……
    Irrational, Unreasonable, No ability to appreciate consequence…….
    ..and she’s convinced nonetheless to jeopardize paradise at the urging of a snake….

    Lesson: Women left to their own devices will destroy civilization and will do so for no reason at all other than a flight of fancy, at the urging of a snake. They must be controlled. Woe to the man and society who fails to appreciate this.


  67. sdfdsd,

    What are you talking about ???????

    The number of men living large off women vs. the number of women living large off of men. Think about it.



  68. Offtopic, but here is SkepticChik giving “advice” on dating:

    His advice basically being: there is no hope for omegas and lesser betas, really uplifting message.


    • Technically it is. Leaves more for greater betas on up.


    • That woman is barren of any quality that is above average. Her mediocrity contrasts grotesquely with her own obvious self-regard. She should be pulling coffee shots at some failing coffee house in a Nebraska college town and glumly sitting through another Take Back the Night Rally, not broadcasting her thoughts on the internet.


      • As a part of the “skeptic” community, which is mostly guys who are lesser betas and omegas.. she is showered with attention, so her ego is fucking huge.


      • She’s trying really hard to be ironic, and coming off as passive-aggressive instead. “Date a fleshlight.” Fuck you, lesbo nerd bitch. No compassion whatsoever for her fellow human beings who happen to be omega dorks.


    • ugly and an abrasive voice. go on…


    • Man – she reeeeeeeaaaaallllllllly is one uuugly biatch.



    • I cant believe this nerd biatch is being approached all the time to have this much arrogant ego. I feel sorry for American guys-she would be totally ignored in Europe-her looks and even bigger her attitude just stinks to high heaven.
      I mean normally even betas would totally ignore, unless desperate. Must be a whole lot of lower beta/gammas approaching her.


    • The deadpan-delivery bit comes off as simply a superiority/entitlement complex coupled with basic disdain for other people, especially men. Lesbo no doubt, doesn’t realize it just yet.


      • on July 27, 2011 at 10:09 am Ricardo di Matteo

        This girl’s ego is massive for one so average in the looks department. Could it be that the dork in the lift was the one who gave her the massive ego inflation? I get the creeps just listening to her monotone droning.


  69. This story reminds me that you should never trust woman’s stories about their friends’ relationships. Important details are always either invented or omitted, who dumped whom gets switched around, anything to cast the friend in the best light possible.

    Not to detract from the main point, but I wonder if the guy really is a douchebag or if the friend was really the victim in all of this.


  70. Why on earth would a jerk be considered a “good-time guy”, unless you were brain damaged? So it’s enjoyable hanging around with an arrogant, mean-spirited asshole?

    who would you rather try to beat (be proud of beating) in a boxing match? the dude who talks mad shit and is hard to hit or the overly genteel opponent that never moves out of the way when you punch him in the face?


  71. “Very few men, betas or alphas, prefer the long term companionship of disloyal, bitchy sluts.”

    Most men I met loved the disloyal, bitchy sluts.They related them to hot sex.

    I remember being called frigid naive girl (or something like it) many times, even though I am neither frigid or naive. I just look and act like a “good girl”. Not the bitchy style.

    Maybe in the 50’s… Nowadays.. No-no. Sorry guys, this just doesn’t happen.


  72. “Very few men, betas or alphas, prefer the long term companionship of disloyal, bitchy sluts.”

    Most men I met loved the disloyal, bitchy sluts.They related them to hot sex.

    The important part being “long term companionship” ie LTR/marriage. Very few men can thrive when they’re too frequently “at war” with their woman and in their Sanctus Sanctorum.


  73. The most important thing I learned in Psych 101 was this: Intermittent reinforcement is the most effective That’s all you need top know.


  74. “I think hot girls love a challenge, and assholes give that to them”

    Assholes tend to be assholes because they think and believe that they can get away with it. This attitute gets reinforced from earlier

    If the chick is a 9, then chances are that the guy is also fairly high up on the “scale” physically and at least in one other aspect; be it money, “cool” job or social status within the group.
    My guess that despite her 9 rating, he self esteem isn’t all that great.

    He probably also fucks her (or HAS fucked her) so well compared to other guys that she is emotionally hooked to the orgasms he gives her.

    The guy can be an asshole because in his mind he believes (and his behaviour confirms) that he has other options.
    This has the doouble whammy of bringing Miss 9’s potentially sky high rating of herself down to earth.


  75. This is interesting….

    The girl I’m seeing is now calling me “selfish”…and claiming we don’t spend enough time together….

    But in reality, I’ve given her gifts and we spend a lot of time…

    So basically…where’s the truth?

    From this post, the reality is if a woman is in love, they construct a reality that makes it exciting and dramatic for them.

    Women love drama…drama fuels their desire.

    If some beta bought them a gift or cooked them dinner…he’d be try hard…

    But if I do it…then it’s never enough because I couple all my actions with various game components…

    Unpredictability is a big driver of this “jerk” behaviour.


    • on July 26, 2011 at 1:33 am driveallnight

      Mine says that all the time. Ignore her or change the subject. Just another shit-test.


    • wala, Cut the gifts. Don’t buy her affection. You are spoiling her. Obviously the gifts are not working or she will not be saying “you are selfish!” She sounds ungrateful and spoiled. She wants to be priority, so she says you are not spending enough time with her. I’m not saying make her your TOP priority, but that’s what I hear her saying. signs of spoil…… : )


    • on July 26, 2011 at 1:16 pm driveallnight

      What is right, wala. They like drama/uncertainty, though they’ll never admit this.

      So, just give her a little more of it than you have been. Think of it as vitamin supplements for her hamster.


      • @Drive/What…

        This is where it seems a Catch 22…chicks dig jerks…so I’m a jerk because I stick to my schedule and do things with her…but if I cave in and find MORE time to spend with her in any given week, then I’m beta…so she would lose respect.

        In one case she complains, in the other…I risk losing her total respect.

        A girl’s rationalization knows no bounds.

        She complains I don’t spend enough time with her, but then she agrees to go away for a weekend with a girlfriend…

        At the heart of this post…and in my situation is a struggle for control…


      • I assume you want this complaining to flat out stop? Tell her to simply stop the complaining, that you are spending as much time with her as you can right now and to take what she can get. Say this as roughly or as gently as you see fit. Some girls need in your face, some not as much. Then pull back for a couple of days to a week to show what she is missing. Then for a couple of weeks go back to the normal schedule. If all of this goes well, throw in a whole day or weekend just for the two of you. Give her what she wants unexpectedly and devote some surprise time. Then go back to your schedule. Throw these surprises in every once in a while as long as the shit tests stop.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 9:09 pm driveallnight



      • wala,

        The “you don’t spend enough time with me is a disguise. What she is really saying is, ” I want to see you drop what you consider your priority for me!” She doesn’t really need nor want to be/see you, hence her going away with a friend. She merely need to be reassured that SHE is your priority. That sounds insecure or entitlement…you will know better cause you know her. I would really cut down on the gifts. In a way it’s good that that is not making her secure, cause if it did then that means she in into material satisfaction. hehe!! dangerous!!!! yikes!!! you need find a balance and pick your battle about what to drop her her and what not. you CAN’t drop everything, cause when you do you WILL be beta meat!!!! lol!!! good luck! : )


      • @what, Drive, Stingray..great insights.

        The shit-tests and schemingt ebb and flow. But now she’s in this mode where she wants to regain hand because I left her behind at a party last week. I said “i’m leaving…” she stuck around. Then when I did leave, she panicked and started calling. Eventually i said come over if you want…she did.

        It was all good…now suddenly she’s thinking about THAT again and shit-testing….

        While all this is going on…at least three other girls are seriously sending IOI’s and making clear they’re free…just make the move…


      • @what, drive, Sting…that above post was mine….


      • She’s Asian right? if that’s the case, I can’t REALLY give away my sister’s secrets! hehe!! However, I can say, she sounds INSECURE about the way you feel about her. It doesn’t help when you leave her at a party, right, seriously. Her “regaining hand” is a way to reassure herself that you are still THERE and interested. A lot of stuff appears to be a power struggle underneath is from insecurity about the connectedness between two people. Enough said…don’t want to give EVERYTHING! hee! hee! Got to keep MY hand! haha!!


      • walawala,

        This may be a double post, if so, I apologize.

        You need to put your foot down regarding the party. You said you were leaving and she decided to stay. That has nothing to do with you. It was her decision. You could, very bluntly, point this out. After that say something along the lines of, “We’ve been through this and it’s over. Drop it.” If she continues, walk away. You don’t need to yell or be an asshole. State it as fact. If she needs a stronger tone, make it stronger. If not, back it down a bit.

        This will get her hamster going and she is likely going to get pissed. It doesn’t matter. Walk away and give her time to get the hamster off the wheel and think about things. If she is worth your time, she will come back to you and apologize, or not. If she doesn’t, don’t push it. If she let’s it go, there is no need to bring it up again, at all. The more you do this the less the shit-tests will occur.

        Also, she doesn’t really want to regain hand. She thinks she does, but when you stand your ground, she will calm, you will calm and so will the relationship. Everyone is happy.


      • If you think that she is insecure, as what says, then after you do something like I described above and she comes back after the hamster spinning, do something to show her that your relationship is secure (assuming it is). If you want a LTR, coming back with the beta after the strong alpha is essential or she will not be able to maintain the relationship. You will scare her off as she needs to know you care, as well.


      • Stingray,

        Nice one. I like the beta after an alpha bit. NICE! : )


      • BTW, sticking to a schedule is not being a jerk. It’s you doing what needs to be done. If you cater to her with this she will be happy at first. Then she would lose respect for you. I wouldn’t recommend it. But throwing that surprise in there once in a while, especially after pulling back so hard, will make her swoon.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 9:13 pm driveallnight

        Again, yes.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 9:08 pm driveallnight

        You got it. A successful LTR is so often a continuous, if unacknowledged, battle for control.

        The key to success is unpredictability, di ba. Do something nice for her (gifts, compliments, etc.) – but do it when it’s unexpected, and *you* feel like it, *not* when she is putting the screws to you.

        Consider it in the context of spectator sports. A blowout is boring. And the same goes for a scoreless tie, right? But a back-and-forth contest, one that is nip-and-tuck with the outcome in doubt — isn’t that the game you keep watching until the final whistle??

        Who says most broads don’t like sports. Seems to me that when it comes to romance, games are what they live for….


      • on July 26, 2011 at 9:35 pm driveallnight

        “Don’t ever let a broad take you out of your game. Ever. The main thing in life is, keeping the main thing the *main* thing.”



      • Confucius said a lot of stuff, but THIS? hmmm (looking suspicious!!)


      • It’s alright What, not many have read his later work.

        It’s right after his immortal and sage words, “Don’t stick it in the crazy”.

        He was a wise man.


      • Matt


      • on July 26, 2011 at 7:43 pm Neil Hansen

        vitamin supplements for her hamster.



      • Neil, too bad! you can’t vitamins, you don’t have a mouth! hee! hee!


      • I do! You just can’t see it. My lips are plump and juicy, like the Rolling Stones logo! Ya baby ya!


      • hmmm sure.


      • on July 27, 2011 at 3:29 pm Neil Hansen

        Sometimes I get lint stuck on them from my mask, though.


      • lol!! Here, I’ll get you a plastic one. It will help with the lint but make sure you put holes in it, other wise you might suffocate! hee! hee! OR

        Just lick the lint off with your ( I’ll quote you) “darting” tongue! lol!! careful…don’t choke! hehe!!


  76. @maya

    I was a regular here in 2009 and Roissy was the sole contributor then. It’s been clear to me for some time that he isn’t the sole writer any longer. He was /is scarier and I watched my p’s and q’s for fear of either banishment or correction (often embarrassing and shaming). I behave respectfully because I’m a guest here, but occasionally there are people who get under my skin and I’ll poke fun. The infamous L.R. (oh those were the days) being one example.
    There are regulars who are still here (Rum, Firepower, Xplat and others) who were here for a long time and others who have left the building i.e. Chic Noir, DA, Lil Grl, LSB etc etc. I peek my lil ole’ head in from time to time, it’s nice to see the conversation is still going on re: alpha/beta.

    For what it’s worth and I know it doesn’t mean anything to most, I believe an alpha man can have moral character and choose monogamy and commitment. No he doesn’t have to, but he chooses to often because the threat of divorce, break-up or other relationship damage isn’t worth it. When I say I like aloofness, it doesn’t mean ignorance or poor treatment of me it means he is still able to separate his own preferences form my own. He will talk for 10 minutes not 45 and understands women are amusingly different. He will not consider my birthday the be all and end all of the year but will make me feel like I’m worth something every day because he will say if I didn’t want to be here it would be a waste of my time and yours.

    I wrote a post back in 2009 that defined what I believe an alpha man can be:


    • An alpha could do this aoefe, but that would decrease his arsholeness and you’d find him less attractive. If he forgot your birthday and bought you a bag of skittles then you’d really love him.

      The kinder alphas are less successful than the arsehole alphas.


  77. I think good girls are an exception to this.

    A good girl might find a jerk exciting and attractive on some level but knows there would be no future and would never sleep with him — especially on the first date.

    Not wanting to waste his time, a jerk would probably not put much effort into the seduction and conquest of such a girl — especially if he has lots of hot girls from which to choose.


  78. on July 26, 2011 at 3:09 am betondo fuchatuch

    Why do women…
    Why do girls….
    Why do they…
    Why is it that women…


    I appreciate your inputs, exposits, and theories as much as I appreciated this forum. And all the various experiences, trials and tests make for interesting, insightful and sometimes humorous reading.

    But I have to tell you – I stopped signing up for Why Do Girls classes a couple of decades ago. And my success with women has been through the roof since then (getting what I want the way I want it – which on this blog may be considered success, but I don’t really consider it at all. I consider it with the same mental draw that I consider how ants dig sugar. They just do. Next topic.).

    Once I stopped listening to women talk and began focusing on their feet, getting what I want literally became a piece of cake. As I’ve stated before, their mouth can lie by rote with predictably delusional precision (I Would Never, Must Be Low Self-Esteem, Abused as a Child) but their feet can’t – the feet will, with very little exception, be exactly where she truly wants to be (see: Rihanna’s feet between Chris Brown’s, Yo Adrian! Rocky I face and all).

    The Editor’s inquiries to the Cat Lady truly served only one purpose – entertainment at the live and predictable verbal proof of the hot chick mouth evidencing total disconnect between mind and body (in the area of Hot Chick/Douchebag Conspiracy Studies, that is).

    My take is to not sign up for the class and just go with the incredibly consistent flow. Once I stopped showering them praise, poetry, petals and phonecalls (until I felt they justly earned them), everything changed. I mean EVERYTHING. Sometimes I’m dumbfounded at the simplicity of it – the beauty of it. And sometimes there’s even a little guilt – until they fire up the Mouth Says This – Feet Say That bullshit machine again. Guilt’s gone, game’s on.

    We both get what we want, really.


    • this.

      i have two very simple rules for dealing with women (all women):

      – ignore what they say, pay attention to what they do (i apply this to everyone, not just women)
      – treat them like the 14 year old girls they all are

      i do find the ‘why do girls’ lectures entertaining though, especially when it brings the females out of the woodwork. then it becomes show and tell.




  80. on July 26, 2011 at 6:23 am Emma the Emo

    Some say women who go for jerks who cheat on them have low self-esteem. I think it might actually be the other way around, at least sometimes. A low self-esteem woman will feel too unattractive compared to the guy who can get any woman he wants, and might not even go there.


    • Because we all know that girls are the ones doing all the approaching, right.


      • on July 26, 2011 at 11:07 am Emma the Emo

        Nah, I meant she won’t go there even if he approaches her first.


      • Darn it Emma, the audience wants a match !

        (Sorry, I couldn’t reply to the earlier thread).

        And OK, maybe we’re not equally matched — but just pretend for a moment we are, maybe in some sort of alternate imaginary universe. You have to admit it’d make a good story….


      • on July 29, 2011 at 8:29 am Emma the Emo

        Sorry. It’s nothing personal, I just don’t want to.


      • on July 27, 2011 at 3:28 pm Neil Hansen

        Are you Norwegian, Emma?


      • on July 29, 2011 at 8:30 am Emma the Emo

        No, I’m Russian. But I lived in Norway for 10 years.


  81. “Good girls” are usually good because they know their place in the food chain.


    • Even if a she isn’t the most beautiful, sexy, hot, etc., there are still plenty of opportunities for a good girl to be bad. It really isn’t that hard to find a relationship for women or, from my observation, have lots of sex with just about anyone.

      We all know our place in the food chain and most of us aren’t at the top.


  82. Great content as usual. I believe that men are rough around the edges and typically given to jerkiness but that does not make them an a-hole or a prick. It makes them regular men. Some women find jerks entertaining but the entertainment quickly ends when they are hurting their feelings.


    • “Some women find jerks entertaining but the entertainment quickly ends when they are hurting their feelings.”

      Women with a healthy dose of self awareness and self esteem will find themselves running to the nearest exit the first time a jerk shows his true colors.

      Not all jerks come right out and start being jerks. Some play the nice guy role for a period and then starts acting out.


      • You’re not worth the effort of being a jerk to, to prove you wrong. Maybe if I’m nice to you you’ll go away.


  83. Someone nailed it with that Gladiator thing.

    Chicks dig power, self-confidence, etc, traits that are commom to jerks but also great leaders, inventors, etc. The choice will probably depend on the woman sel-esteem.

    So instead of sayin’ “chicks dig power, etc”, the self-pity weak losers prefer to say “chicks dig jerks”, so then they can fool themselves.


  84. “Chicks dig power, self-confidence, etc, traits that are commom to jerks but also great leaders, inventors, etc.
    So instead of sayin’ “chicks dig power, etc”, the self-pity weak losers prefer to say “chicks dig jerks”, so then they can fool themselves”

    Really? What power does a third time ex-con have? What power does an abuser have besides physical power over a weaker person?

    THAT is NOT power, and it damn sure isn’t leading.


    • On the surface, who has more power? A thug with a gang who can kill a man with a pistol, or a general that signs an order with his pen that kills a thousand men with a bombing strike?

      If you don’t know what each one does, the thug looks more powerful because the results of his actions are right in front of you. If you don’t know what the general does, the general looks like an old man attending meetings and sitting behind a desk. But if you think about it, the general is the more powerful of the two because he can get more accomplished.

      A woman who is only looking for immediate gratification will go for the thug because she believes him to be the stronger of the two and on the surface, she’s right. But a woman who is thinking and taught to control herself will go for the general because he has actual power.

      Same goes for the asshole vs. the provider. The provider could actually have more power than the asshole because he’s the one that has a higher chance of being able to function in society, build businesses and wealth, direct men, etc. But the asshole will still get the chicks because his actions are more direct and LOOK stronger.

      Perception’s everything.


      • exactly ..who has been most susceptible to 60 years of advertising – women .. in the 50’s 60’s it was John Wayne Sean Connery as type and now its Brad Pitt George Clooney? – Men vs men with a boys mentality


      • Never has a wiser analysis been made about women’s hamster thinking mode. Spot on.+


      • So what, should men emulate these a-holes and jerks just so they can sleep with the types of women that are attracted to these types? Why would they even be desireable in that case, unless looks and sex are all that matters in life to you.


      • “unless looks and sex are all that matters in life to you”

        You’re learning.


      • Well if only looks and sex are all that matters in life and nothing else, then that’s a pretty hollow life. Having your life center around sex, looks, and women; not personal fullfillment and growth, hobbies. Heck, inner peace.

        Not to mention that guys will get themselves in situations where they’re dealing with a chick who is crazy or a real b*tch (all because looks and sex were all they paid attention to in the beginning).


      • if that is what they want, then yes. so what’s your point?


      • I don’t know. That it’s not worth emulating negative characteristics and changing yourself for the worse just so you can be popular with a particular crowd or group of people. If you can only be popular to them in that way, then they’re not worth being around.

        But hey that’s just me.


  85. He’s got ATTITUDE, baby. This blog is big on not needing money, but GAME. I know tons of rich guys that can’t get laid in a women’s prison.


    • Hot finance girl. Too bad there are so few (only ever met one or two and even those were closer to commercial banking than true finance).


  86. I think you and your mother’s, sorry “girlfriend’s”, cat should get a room.


  87. Here’s an example of a guy acting like a jerk, in public, and the girl absolutely loving himself for it:


  88. If we assume that you are right that (1) women dig jerks and (2) women have all sorts of internal defense mechanisms to keep themselves from believing they dig jerks, even when presented with the facts, then this creates an interesting dilemma for evolutionary psychology.

    It’s one thing to say that we behave a certain way, or prefer certain things, because of such and so evoutionary pressures. But if we admit the possibility that evolutionary pressures might lead us to steadfastly refuse to believe something — despite the evidence — then the whole discipline seems to be at risk.


  89. Hypothetical question (I would like to think I know the answer to this but as I think more about it, I don’t have the experience to be sure):

    If there are two alphas in a room, one is an asshole, and one is simply alpha (I like the example of Russell Crowe in Gladiator) will the women flock to one over the other? Or is this where more personal taste comes in?


    • I’d say – if the administrator permits, as my comments have been misteriously disapearing – that the lower the woman’s self-esteem is (true self-esteem, not the superficial one that most women show off), the more likely it is that she will choose the asshole.


  90. And what adds to the fun is that nice men will be blamed for the behavior of assholes. Women… ehem.. what’s the word I am looking for… ah yes… stentoriously decry the behavior of such men. Someone must pay. It will be the one who finally worked up the nerve to politely ask for her hand. She will turn on him and run her claws into the well worn grooves like a post that is shredded and pissed upon in a disputed area between the demons of fear and doubt. He is certain to be one of those assholes. But lo, there is hope. His friend who just grabbed her ass is surely a misunderstood gentlemen by birth, corrupted in his youth by his evil step mother and every natural evil that surely has gone against him.


  91. on July 26, 2011 at 1:58 pm Rollo Tomassi

    Heartsie/Roissy, here’s a reading suggestion for you:

    You even get a specific mention:

    “You don’t have to be an asshole, but if you have no choice, being an inconsiderate asshole beats being a polite beta, every tim.” – Roissy, Chapter 5, pg. 104.

    Women and their beta sympathizers will hate this book because it exposes, and empirically proves (biologically and statistically) that women are innately hard-wired to opt for the Alpha Jerk in favor of the Beta NIce Guy by order of degrees and according to their capacity to attract and maintain that pairing.

    Sorry ladies, the jig is up, and you’re predictable. I’m sure you wont read the book however, because that would require an effort in dispelling the rationales you depend upon to maintain your internal self-worth in the face of such glaring conviction-behavior inconsistencies.


  92. My God, its amazing how the Epic Eternal Mystery that is Woman becomes as mundane and approachable as high-school algebra once you peek behind the curtain with evolutionary psychology!!


    • Yup. Women aren’t mysterious at all. What’s mysterious is men’s capacity for overestimating them, or believing women before their own lying eyes.


  93. Every man alive should memorize The Taming of the Shrew….


  94. Women do seem to like assholes. This most likely has an evolutionary basis. However, I disagree with those PUA gurus who try to argue that the “alphas” are somehow better, more successful, etc.


    • I think they only argue that they’re better at getting laid. But then, what else do you need that you can’t provide for yourself?


  95. “We women enter the world with this necessity of loving undefined, and if we take one man in preference to another, let us say so honestly, we yield less to the knowledge of merit than to a mechanical instinct which is nearly always blind. For proof of this I need only refer to the foolish passions with which we sometimes become intoxicated for strangers, or at least for men with whom we are not sufficiently acquainted, to relieve our selection of them from the odium of imprudence from the beginning; in which case if there is a mutual response, well, it is pure chance. We are always forming attachments without sufficient circumspection, hence I am not wrong in comparing love to an appetite which one sometimes feels for one kind of food rather than for another, without being able to give the reason.” – Ninon de L’Enclos


  96. I don’t think girls dig mean-spirited, negative jerks. But they do like emotional strength and men who don’t take their drama too seriously. And we all like people who have options.


  97. Have any of you tried to snag a girl who is with a total piece of shit, using Game?

    Because if it worked, then it would prove wrong the theory that the jerk will always win out.

    By jerk I mean REALY JERK piece of shit who does fucked up things to her. Amoral lowlife scumbag kind of guy.


  98. on July 26, 2011 at 7:23 pm Libertardian

    Here’s Exhibit #1 duodecillion from Sunny Seattle:

    “We dated for six years and planned on getting married. I was 26 and you were 31. Now I’m 32 and you are 38. I should have run at the start when I found out about your “recreational” cocaine use. You convinced me that you did it once a year and I believed you. I also believed you when you said you sold marijuana “only to my friends” while you were in graduate school to become a special-education teacher. It took you five years to get through school and still no permanent job. I accepted this, as you said that this was common among teachers. I found out later that everyone in your class had already been offered a position. When I got pregnant, you said you didn’t have enough money for a baby. You didn’t even offer to pay for part of the abortion. You went skateboarding the day of the procedure, were late, and nonchalantly asked if I was cool if you went to go get something to eat while we were in the waiting room. The last straw was when we finally moved in together and I found e-mails from you to a random girl on Craigslist Casual Encounters with your pictures saying, “Meet here or there?” You did it again two months later, were too stupid to delete the e-mails, and tried to convince me it was spam mail. I knew better. You broke down crying saying how sorry you were and it would never happen again and you were high on coke. Absolutely fucking right it will never happen again. This is the man who is trying to teach in the Seattle School District?? Hide your kids, hide your wife!!!!!!”

    No doubt at least a solid 8 with 6+ beta orbiters (at least when this started, probably much less now).


  99. on July 26, 2011 at 7:35 pm Corporal Hicks

    Ah, Brasil61 –

    Excellent point. If there are many fish in a toxic nuclear pond (i.e. the USSA), why waste your time learning to catch them?

    Go for cleaner waters, while you still can.


  100. In regards to “nice guys” versus jerks – POOK (from sosuave) said it best many years ago:

    Nice Guyius Patheticus!

    “Feminism came without warning… and conquered men. It has created a generation of neurotic males. A male of this time may be one of them.

    -Do you believe it is wrong to judge a woman by how she looks?

    -Do you believe it is wrong to advance on a woman, sexually, with no verbal consent?

    -Do you believe women have been ‘discriminated’ because of their gender, that males intentionally put women down?

    -Do you believe that in sex, it is wrong to even consider to ‘have your way with her’ and become and be the sensuous animal you’ve always dreamed?

    -Do you believe women desire, as priority, respect?

    “If you believe in any of these things, even just a little, you have been affected by Modern Feminism. It is the virus that creates the effects known as Nice Guyius Patheticus!


  101. I agree with this post but it doesn’t explain the legions of women (at least here in Canada) who don’t go for jerks but prefer men to be pedestalizing doormats – my ex being one of them.


  102. Responsibility is “beta” today… they have to catch you or, at least, figure out your real name if they want to get child support outta you! Real Alphas (as the leader) are responsible for nopt only what they do but for what their bunch does; i.e., they’re responsible for more than themselves… which is a far cry from poseurs who want to pull a few tricks, pop their jizz and be gone before her hamster stops spinning.


  103. I fell in love with an Alpha 🙂 I actually lost several girlfriends over the entire thing. I called one on the phone and cried hysterically “He has a girlfriend!!” Evidently, calling her with an emotional crisis was the end of our friendship (I’ll take 5 minutes of alpha over a rotten female friend any day!)

    I will tell you this though….as a girl….There was this one time that I looked really great and I know that for one second I took his breathe away. Now that my friends, is a memory akin to any of Roissy’s.

    Memorieeess…autumn colored memmorrieesss….of the alpha long ago…..


  104. I think for a woman, being beautiful is the greatest achievement. So when you look good enough to get an alpha on the hook in some manner– It’s so much more validating than anything else in life. (at least other than family and children of course)


    • on July 27, 2011 at 2:49 pm Good Luck Chuck

      A woman’s social value is based upon the value of the man from which she is able to obtain a commitment. Beauty is the means to the end.

      Don’t forget about the importance of femininity though. Beauty will get you laid, being beautiful AND feminine will get you the prize- a high value husband.


  105. I would like to hear what the blogger thinks about porn and its influence on the dating/mating market. It’s free, it’s safe, it’s quick, you can “have” any type of woman and any type of situation you want, and it’s a sure thing.

    I have a feeling that many omegas and lesser betas have given up with women and have sought refuge in porn, leaving the greater betas and alphas to fight it out over the last remaining thin, attractive women.

    And as porn becomes more and more realistic, it would seem to me that its constant use would work its way up to even greater betas and maybe some day even alphas.

    I’m in a dry spell right now with hot women. But there are three 5s and two 4s that I could bang pretty much at any time. They were my fallback girls a few years ago that I tapped a few times then got bored with. Sometimes I feel an urge so I email one and say “Let’s get together.” We make plans and then I wack one out to some tube8 girl and end up cancelling the date! haha ah well.

    But anyway I know what porn does to the libido–satisfies it to an extent that eclipses 4s and 5s at least 😉 I have a feeling it’s having a fairly decent impact on more than just me.


  106. Dudes,

    I have a Gilfriend(Solid 8) in the Facebook and in the last days, she add as a friend a lot of Alpha males. She have a lot of pictures in her wall and coment in the alpha males wall. I don’t have Facebook. Shold i create and add a lot of womans ? Or is better talk with she about her friends ?


  107. Chicks are just dumb. Everything worthwhile in civilization has been built by men.


    Anyway, It may not be related to the post, but I heard a conversation of two models in a party last Sunday, while one of them held the girl’s toilet door open and I left the guy’s toilet

    GIRL 1: Have you seen that XYZ guy?
    GIRL 2: Yeah! He looks like one of those who leave you unable to sit the following day, but is well worth it!!!

    Talk about game…


  108. on July 27, 2011 at 9:32 am Rollo Tomassi

    What I think throws a lot of this discussion into polarized, binary accounts is the use of the work “jerk”. If I made a case for women preferring the sexual attentions of self-concerned, cocky-but-confident Alpha males who carry themselves with an air of status and respectability with just enough social proof to back up the idea that they’d be the type of guy an overwhelming majority of women would compete amongst themselves for, well, the debate would at least start from a more neutral territory.

    When we call these guys assholes or jerks the connotation is presumed negative, and any woman agreeing to enjoying the company of assholes is immediately cast in the role of “low self-esteem” or lacking self-respect, etc. It’s like accusing someone of rolling in shit and expecting them to admit to loving it. So the natural defense is for women (and beta sympathizers) to claim the opposite and use isolated anecdotal experiences to reinforce a more positive perception.

    It’s far easier to poison the well by accusing women admitting to loving the Bad Boy by calling her self-worth into question than to actually examine statistics and observable predictable, behaviors. The biological truth of the matter is women bear far too much long term risk in potential breeding and parental investments to ever be objectively honest with themselves about what is actually motivating their sexual selections. It is not in the best interests of the feminine imperative that men even be given the inclination of being made aware of how this selection process operates. In fact, this deception is of such primary importance to the feminine breeding methodology that the female psyche evolved its own self-deceptive psychological schemas to preserve the female ego while enacting it.

    So in a sense, Roissy has hit upon an interesting truth. Most women are literally oblivious to the underlying motivations of their sexual selections. Evolution has largely selected for human females with a capacity to form psychological schemas that preserve an ego-investment that would otherwise afflict them with debilitating anxiety, guilt, and the stresses that result from being continuously, consciously aware of their own incongruities. Evolution selects for solipsistic women who are blissfully unaware of their solipsism.


  109. I’m new here, and I haven’t read all of the comments (cut me some slack, 357 and counting?). But I’m wondering if anyone has brought the role that fathers (or lack of fathers) play in women’s sexual attraction. All women want alpha’s. I totally agree with that. But from what I’ve observed, women who were raised without a strong father figure in their lives are willing to accept the “asshole alpha’s”, while women who were raised in families with a strong male figure at the head tend to look for “nice guy alpha’s”. In other words, they look for a strong, dominant, masculine guy who is a good provider, loyal, and shows her kindness and consideration (as long as she accepts his leadership and shows him respect and consideration in return.)
    Unfortunately, nowdays most girls are raised apart from their biological fathers due to divorce. Which I think is why so many girls go for the “asshole alpha”. They see male strength, but they can’t seem to differentiate between a stong male who is going to treat her like shit, and a strong male who is the protector/ provider type.
    Just off the top of my head, I can think of quite a few extremely hot girls who got married to “nice guy” alpha’s (guys who were atheletes, popular, good looking, and dominant, but still “good guys” who had strong morals and treated other people with respect, as long as they were given respect in return) right out of high school and are still happily married. And almost all of those girls had parents who were still happily married when we graduated.
    On the other hand, I also knew a bunch of really hot girls whose parents were divorced, and were raised either by single mothers or by mothers and a rotating string of “boyfriends”. Those girls tended to sleep around with the “asshole alphas”. And the majority of those girls ended up getting knocked up by some dude who bailed and left them to be single mothers themselves. And now their going to raise another generation of fucked up girls (and boys).
    In my opinion, everything we’re seeing now is a direct result of the end of the traditional family. Women who are raised in that enviornment pick guys who are good for them. Women who aren’t raised in that enviornment either pick guys who aren’t good for them, or have no idea what is good for them. Just my two cents…


  110. Just as an addendum to my earlier post, in my experience it works both ways. Alpha’s can come from all walks of life, but it seems to me that “good guy” alpha’s tend to come from strong traditional families, while “asshole alpha’s” are more likely to come from broken homes….


    • Yeah, but most spolied women these days just take asshole as “Alpha” and complain “Where are all the good men?” from there after being treated like crap. Good = “Beta” is what things are reduced-to today.


  111. I would really love to know why women write so many fucking books on the subject of sexuality and relationship dynamics… when its clear they have zero understanding of it!


  112. back on topic:


  113. How about this:

    Why do women stay with assholes?

    Because they love the drama.

    Eventually, though the drama becomes too much. Every woman has a different threshold for drama.


    • on July 27, 2011 at 3:56 pm driveallnight

      “Because they love the drama.”

      Finally! You’re getting warmer, but…..

      “Eventually, the drama becomes too much.”

      Sometimes, sure. But usually *after* the “asshole” has been banging her silly throughout the HDV years of her life.

      “Every woman has a different threshold for drama.”

      Fair enough. So does every man.


    • Because they love the drama.

      Lol, just like the drama on this blog…


    • on July 27, 2011 at 4:19 pm Neil Hansen

      Anoukange used to comment here, and she has an unusually high threshold for drama. Well into her late 30’s, she blogs about all the global alphas she bangs. Jenny, only in her early 20’s, will tire of drama in short order. Asian women can’t just bang dudes into perpetuity, even if their alpha. It brings too much shame to the family.


    • on July 27, 2011 at 4:21 pm Rollo Tomassi

      Which do you believe is the more common scenario:

      A woman leaving her her stable, loving, dependable, but otherwise uninspiring and predictable beta nice-guy boyfriend/husband for an exciting, but erratic Alpha she hopes will change for her.


      A woman leaving her erratic, but exciting self-concerned, asshole Alpha lover for a stable, loving and considerate beta who’s been supportive all along for her?

      You see, women don’t leave Alpha jerks for nice betas. Circumstances in her relationship with an Alpha may exceed her tolerance (or his) to remain in that relationship, but she never sees the beta as the option worth leaving an Alpha for. Women never willingly trade down. Enduring a jerk’s behavior is still preferable to enduring a beta’s adorations.

      That’s not to say women don’t find themselves with betas after an LTR with an Alpha, they just didn’t opt for it.

      Bonus question:
      After having been involved in an LTR with both a beta nice guy and an Alpha jerk, which one is a woman more likely to fantasize about later?


      • LOL. A girl fantasizing about a beta nice guy… that’ll be the day.

        “OOOHHHH, those flowers he brought me… OOOOHHH, they were so pretty… and he told me I was beautiful…. he was SOOOOO NIIICE… OOOHHHH… what a nice GUUUYYY… OOOOOHHH… OOOOHHH!!!!”


      • Yeah… Alphas make ’em CUMMM and allow ’em to bitch about how much of a bastard they are at the same time (call it a two-fer).


      • As was quoted earlier: “Women are attracted to status and some of the things that men do to demonstrate their status are downright immoral. But women are often attracted by those actions anyway.”


  114. Interesting you point to evolution on this …

    Here’s something to think about:

    Before the advent of modern medical technology
    (which is no time at all in evolutionary terms)
    childbirth was the single largest cause of death
    among women of childbearing age.

    A woman having sex was extremely likely to die
    in the process of birthing a child if she got pregnant.
    This is still the case in many parts of the world today.

    It is necessary for the survival of the species that women have
    sex and children, even though childbearing is/was extremely likely
    to kill any individual woman who does it.

    So women seem to have a built in blind spot when it comes to
    thinking rationally about sex … and evolution may have something
    to do with it … ?

    I think there is some truth to that.


  115. “Swatting her cat off her couch before sitting down on it”

    Man, I laughed so hard when I read this.


  116. […] selects for solipsistic women who are blissfully unaware of their solipsism." –Rollo Tomassi Chicks Dig Jerks: The Veil Of Self-Deception Chateau Heartiste Echoes somewhat Stirling's […]


  117. Heartiste said:
    “I poked her cat in the anus with a pen I was holding”

    You never know where Heartiste’s cornhole obsession will bizarrely manifest itself.