Wrapped Around His Finger

We talk a lot about alpha males here, and their mysterious pull on women. We discuss their attributes, their attitude and their game, and how and why it works to vibrate vaginas all across the land. But sometimes the weight of theory can deaden the senses, and it helps to have a real-life, flesh and blood exemplar of alphaness staring you in the face to bring that theory down to solid earth, where you can see and hear it all from your personal first-person view. In that spirit, I will relay a moment in time from my life so that you can feel like you’re stepping in my shoes and witnessing it yourself.

I was at a large social event (the more astute readers will be able to figure out the type of event from details in this post) and was seated at a table with mostly women — all in their mid to late 20s — and a couple of men. As a keen observer of sexual dynamics, the rapport between one of the men and his girlfriend was especially entertaining to me.

She was completely enamored of him, leaning against him, smiling at him (and when she wasn’t smiling she was “smizing” at him  — smiling with her eyes), touching him on his hands and arms and shoulders and thighs, blushing periodically when he deigned to smirk at her (which wasn’t often), flattering him, imperceptibly nudging her chair closer to his, nuzzling into his man-nook where pec meets armpit, gazing up at his face (and I do mean UP, as she would deliberately arch her back and neck so that her body was compressed in the vertical and he was looming over the top of her head), defending him when her girl friends were challenging him on something he said, and, best of all, apologizing profusely for imagined slights that she believed she had accidentally committed against him. When she spoke, either to him or to others in his company, she sounded, not to put too fine a point on it, like a ditz. Yes, she was doing all this in front of about ten people, some total strangers to her.

For his part, he was behaving and speaking in almost the exact opposite manner as his girlfriend. He would sit straight, neither leaning away nor into her, would speak in a heavy and deep monotone, would rarely smile (and when he did it was always a half-assed “yeah i’m the douchebag you wish you were” effort), would only touch her when he was reaching around to grab her ass for a makeout, seemed oblivious to her cloying flattery, effected an air of imperturbable indifference, showed little outward signs of affection for her except for the one time I caught sight of them absconding to what they thought was a private location, occasionally spoke ill of her even to the point of insulting her, never complimented her, looked straight ahead in the middle distance when she complimented him, never said “thank you” or “excuse me”, never excused or “forgave” her when she was excessively apologizing to him (in fact, he seemed to relish her clumsy supplication), would sometimes insult her friends right in front of her, would often command (not ask) her to get him a drink, and, best of all, flirted with other hot girls at the table.

There was a telling moment of the nature of their relationship early in the night. She was giddy and excitable as she laughed with her girlfriends and some new arrivals, when it suddenly dawned on her that she had neglected to promptly introduce her boyfriend to everyone. (And by promptly, I mean not more than three seconds had passed before she caught herself in this supposed irredeemable faux pas.) Red-faced, she humbly corrected herself.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!” she pleaded as she looked at him. “I’m so sorry! So sorry! I forgot to introduce you to everyone! Everyone, this is [name], my boyfriend.” Now semi-whispering to him, “Sorry, baby! Sorry.”

His facial expression remained unmoved. A powerful pause heightened the awkwardness before he answered. “Don’t worry about it. I got it.” He then nods in the direction of the others.

His vocal tone and expression are important here. It was not consolingly beta, where the pitch rises on “worry” and descends to a loving shoulder rub on an elongated “I got it”, as his eyes crinkle at the corners in reassurance. Nope, it was more like a staccato, Draper-esque, punch to the face, flatly delivered, emotionless except for a hint of contempt, which was noticeable in the way he commandeered the drama by addressing the table himself and refusing to glance at her as she effused with apologia.

I watched admiringly. The other man at the table glanced at his feet nervously. The girls were a mix of hatred and arousal.

This guy was the flawless encapsulation of the jerk. The dick. The narcissistic prick. All together now…

The Asshole Hot Chicks Love.

And she? She was the hot chick who loves an asshole. Every mannerism, word and body shift — right down to the tiniest facial tic — telegraphed her absolute devotion — her ADDICTION — to her jerk boyfriend.

Now some of you will parry with the usual gripes. But before you do, know the following:

She graduated from a top-tier Ivy. Her degree is in a numbers-related field. She is hot, a hard 8.5. Her body is worthy of a sacrificial fuckening. According to my sources, when she isn’t with her alpha-squared asshole boyfriend, she is one of the smartest, most put-together and confident girls in a room. The ditz act, apparently, only blossoms in his presence. Her girl friends are jealous of her even though they hate what she becomes when she’s with him. And the blow that I know will sting beta males the worst? She COULD have almost any man she wanted — good men, solid company men, respectable men of their communities — but she chooses to be with an arrogant renegade.

And him? Decent looking. Easy on the eyes, I suppose most women would say. Certainly not Hollywood looks. Not a big or muscular guy. Lean to the point of skinny. Edgy, downscale style. (She showed up at this event poured into an exquisite cocktail dress. He arrived late with her, wearing frayed designer jeans and an untucked tight flannel shirt over a white Hanes wifebeater that was showing through the top. Most of the other men were wearing suits.) He was short. Yes, he might have been a half inch shorter than his gf. Unemployed.

You read that right. He lost his [redacted] industry job six months ago and was living off her earnings. He has money, but he doesn’t spend it because, as he explained to me, he’s saving it for a few years of fun-time travel. Whether he intends her to go with him or not is left to interpretation.

None of this is new to me. I’ve met guys like him before. I’ve *been* that guy plenty of times, when the mood strikes. I’m intimately familiar with the adoring love copping such a grotesque asshole alpha attitude inspires in women. There is no escaping that this is a reality of female sexual nature, a powerfully harsh reality that sends shockwaves of disbelief and disillusion through the more tenderhearted of the inexperienced idealists. Some learn from what they see behind the curtain; others cocoon further into self-medicating platitudes.

And what about the spectators? What did the men and women in attendance think of him, both those who knew and knew of him? From what I could glean, the men were largely neutral. Some hated him (usually the biggest betas with overbearing girlfriends), some liked him (maybe not surprising, the alphas and the omegas were affable toward him), and most were willing to throw him under the bus in furtive conversation at the behest of their gossipy girlfriends.

More pertinently, how did the women — all of them well-educated urbanite professionals — feel about him? In his company, they were girlish and borderline shy, or self-conscious. Behind his back, they were disparaging, complaining bitterly of the way he treats his girlfriend (bitterness was correlated with their closeness to her), and constantly — I mean CONSTANTLY — working to install his ouster. I saw one girl drag her away so that she could introduce her to a man who, unknown to her at the time, was a handsome gay man.

If you held any doubts that girl friends will not conspire against you should they find you unacceptable boyfriend material for their friend, well… you can put those doubts to rest now.

Of course, none of their efforts worked in the least. He had been dating his girlfriend for many years, during which time he has cheated on her for months at a stretch with more than one woman. His cheating, his aloof treatment of her, her friends’ dispproval… none of it seemed to have dampened her love for him. Or her loyalty to him, for as I learned from a trusted source, she never, not once in the sumptuous prime of her life when she had every excuse and rationale to do so, cheated on him.

Remember that the next time you hear of some whiny ho cheating on her beta boyfriend, and rationalizing it by blaming it all on him.

The professed hate the girls had for this asshole boyfriend of one of their friends, and the wet glower in their eyes when they spoke of him, belied a primitive attraction. It was not the impassioned hate a man has for another man who has humiliated him, or the withering hate a woman has for a weak ex-lover who now repulses her. When I heard them talk about him, their words ostensibly carried a payload of anger and disgust, but it was a gossamer veneer; to a hardened pro of female codespeak like myself, the dulcet harmonies of untamed curiosity sent their words aloft on a stanza of gina tingles. Listen closely, and you can hear the subliminal poetry asserting itself — “ode to why oh why do i hate this guy but feel like i do?”

Interestingly, there was one girl, a looker in every way and smart as tacks to boot, whose loathing for the asshole boyfriend of her best friend seemed the most genuine. I say “seemed”, because it may merely be the case that she was best at concealing her shameful intrigue. Whatever the true motivation, I found her responses to him the most cutting. She was clearly aiming for the throat, and her eyes pierced like laser beams, her voice cold and still as sheet ice. Lesser men would have suffered a grievous wound from her attacks, for her barbs were sharp and subtle enough to avoid triggering a hen phalanx of social diplomacy. But the asshole deflected her thrusts without breaking a sweat. In the smarts department, he was outclassed, but in the attitude department he had her number.

Why did I find this dynamic the most interesting? Background helps. She was dating a considerably older man who was not present at this event, an alpha male in his own right, for many years. Perhaps, intimate familiarity with her own alpha braces her for the abyss that always looms ominously to eternally capture a woman’s heart should she become completely unguarded. She sees in the asshole boyfriend of her friend the power the alpha male has over all female sense and reason, and she wants to put him on notice. It is her redemption.

More interesting, she alone among all the girl friends never consoled her smitten friend, never attempted to introduce her to new men, and never assuaged her ego by telling her she could do better. She was smart enough to know those kinds of interventions have no effect and, worse, usually result in the opposite of what was intended. There’s an unwritten rule among very high-value women who date alpha males — the hate is for show. No woman would seriously give up the pleasure she gets from dating the alpha jerks she loves. They’d all poach each other’s boyfriends given half the chance, and they know it.


  1. The fact that you’re still knowingly proving yourself, and proving and proving and proving yourself, is more interesting than the content of the post. I think the only people who won’t get it at this point are those who utterly lack the capacity.


    • as one of those chaps who utterly lack the capacity: sod off will you.


    • If anybody is foolish enough to disbelieve the Chateau’s sage wisdom, they can read the comments here and see the evidence pouring straight from the whore-ses’ mouths:


      They are deluded enough to not believe the truth…

      “NewYorkGirl @Wandell
      No, I totally get it. I think I was just shocked at the sheer amount of stories on here. I have also dated my fair share of jerks.”

      …but as man, you shouldn’t be.


    • Or people who purposefully ignore the truth because they’d rather live in a bubble of faux security than contend with the nature of their betadom.

      But yea, as I’ve mentioned a couple of times before, this blog kind of overkills these certain subjects by proving them again and again.


  2. ok


  3. Keep up the dutiful and just work.


  4. on October 12, 2011 at 2:38 pm greatbooksformen GBFM

    heyeyey heartistseee

    u are by affar the best mens righst mens movements blog

    the bestset ver you need lotsa publsihing deals to get your books in all da bookstoeres already!!!!!!! lozozlzllzlz

    as you are

    an indidviual
    man a primal soul
    who lays it on teh line

    who uses logic and reason
    and humor
    like a man


    on the other hand, the spearhead seems to be filled with a lot of butthexers and unmanly asscockers who try to pass off sosodmy and butthex as “natural” actas natural activities and good and ture and beuatiful, as they queietly sectrievely sodomize your future wife, silenelty tpaing it ans they slide tehir tinay cocks into peopels butthoels zlozlzlzlzllzoz


    GBFM October 12, 2011 at 10:09
    Opus October 12, 2011 at 09:45 Opus writes:
    Were it as simple as some people here would like it to be. Why not blame the bankers and send them all to an appropriate circle of The Inferno, but banking is part of capitalism and capitalism has always gone from boom to bust and back again, and will doubtless do so again, as there does not seem to be any alternative system on offer, and those other systems tend to fight normal human instincts.

    to OPUS butthex and lotsas coakksksk in da butthole are “normal human instincts.”

    to OPUS, fucking your brother in the anuthshole butthole anithushole butthole is a normal human instainct lzlzoozozozo

    to OPUS, transferring welath via the inflation dand deflation of bubble and butthex and ascereve tapeings fo butthex by tucker max rhymes iwth goldman sax are “normal human instincts.”

    OPUS must have a cock as tiny as his anuthole is big, as he neevr noticthes the pain of butthex, neither when he gives it nor receieveth it lzozozozo


    • on October 12, 2011 at 3:24 pm greatbooksformen GBFM


      they favor butthexing and girly games and sectieve buttheinxin dsoodm and sheisster neoocn games

      which si why the mens movement

      generally epic fails

      i mean even that bernard chapin guy lauds tucker max


      asscockers alll!!!!

      insetad of speaking to the mens omovement with “friends, romans, and countrymen, lend me your ears” one has to start their speach with

      “assockers, butthexers, and sododmites, lend me your anuthes”

      and then the speaheaders put their little epseahead in da anutholes in and out in and out in and out

      were it not for heartistse/dhcateau/roisissy, i just might give up hope that hwerhehee wa sone man left who escaped the asscocking with his anuth intatct lzozolzlzozoozzo


      • Friend: GBFM used to drive me nuts but now I rather look forward to his maniacal posts.

        Me: Do you really respect your asscocking handlers enough to patiently grace them with good grammar and syntax? Therein lies the sublime GBFM message.


      • on October 13, 2011 at 12:45 pm greatbooksformen GBFM


        yah someoeboyd gets it!!!

        over ta th at the spearhead they are checking my grammar
        alongside aging neocn womenz like charlotte allen who repetaes tucker maxs lies that he ihis six feet tall in the weeekly standard tucker max rhymes iwth goldman sax lzozlzozo sexetievrr taper of butthex with your fiture wife assockersss lzzlzlo

        over ta th at the butthurt spearhead they are checking my grammar
        thinking that it is my grammar that is making them butthurt
        while really, it is da giaant enoecn neocockas goin in and out
        of the male’s anuth nd their fiture wive’s anuth


      • Bad grammar, incomplete syntax, a couple dozen lzozolzzololzs and the truth will set you free.


      • on October 13, 2011 at 12:51 pm greatbooksformen GBFM

        speaking of grammars lzozolzlzlz: proper grammarzz lzozlzozl:


        lozlzzlozlzlzzz zlzozlzzl zlz omg!!!!

        so cool art and shiznit!!! thanku thankyou thanx thankyou roissy!!

        dude the chcik should have one hand wrapped around teh cock that would add a lot. and she should be looking out at the audience. lzozlzlz lzozzlz omg lzozlzlzllzlz

        and she should be asking “why are there no good men left?”

        and if you put two more dudes gizzing on her form the otyehr side lzozllzl

        omg omg omg lzozlzlzzop

        a girl is getting ass banged by tucker max as his friend films it without her consent just like in the story and book the new york neocons publish and profit of. the girl is yelling “help! help! please help me! ooooh help! i am getting butthexed and it is being taped without my consent!” and there, with a ruler, is standing a neocon womenz scoliding teh girl saying, “that is not how you spell butthex!!!””


        i have another idea for a cartoon.

        a woman down on all fours getting doggystled by a man while sucking on anotehr’s cock as a couple others spluge on her.

        and with the cock just outside her mouth and her hand wrapped around it she says, looking innocently at we the viewer, “why are there no good men left?”

        lzozzllzozlzllzlzlzllz lzozlzlzlzlzl

        hey roissy if you drew these we would beocme rich & famous and get published in teh new yorker and weekly standard and other butthex glorifying publications

        omg omg omg omg!!!!


        i just came up with a magnificent way of combing the above cartoons!!!!

        a woman down on all fours getting doggystled by a man while sucking on anotehr’s cock as a couple others spluge on her.

        and with the cock just outside her mouth and her hand wrapped around it she says, looking innocently at we the viewer, “why isn’t there no good men left?” (only the i in isn’t isn’t dotted)

        lzozzllzozlzllzlzlzllz lzozlzlzlzlzl

        then a neocon grammar police woman, standing there watching the ganbang with a ruler in her hand says, “be sure 2 dot her i’s!”

        get it?

        google dot here eyes here:

        lzozlzlz lzzozlzlzolzlz zlz zlzl omg roissy

        we gonna be rich

        arianna huffintonpost will pay us $1,000,000,000 2 publish our cartoons on her beta blog lzozlzl


    • on October 12, 2011 at 7:07 pm gbfm lzlozloozl


      “Sean October 12, 2011 at 15:51
      I was waiting for some guy to explain because they’re many who won’t know who GBFM is…he’s a regular over at ‘Roissy’ and yeah, he talks like that ALL the time…ie ‘buttsexing’ and ‘cocking’…trust me, he is the VERY LAST thing we need over here at The Spearhead at this point…was dreading this…Bill might have to put his foot down on this one…”


      Bill might have to put his foot down on this one… klzioziozkizkizki


      • uh October 12, 2011 at 16:22
        I’m shocked people spend their FAFSA fiatbux on classes. I spent mine on a computer and trips to the Caribbean. Joke’s on you, Government!

        uh biutthexed the govbtment


      • Much respect, and a question for the GBFM:

        How best to put the kibosh on the Bernanke buthexxerz and the fiat-feminazizt system?

        I try to put as many uninitiated fiat zombies in contact with blogs like this in hopes that they will awaken and mobilize. Lots of link dropping in forums and news sites, each day. Every man I awaken is a nail in the system’s coffin…and I hammer nails (no butthex) daily.

        What do you think the average footsoldier in the MRM should be doing?


      • “How best to put the kibosh on the Bernanke buthexxerz and the fiat-feminazizt system?”

        As a wise Pakistani arms dealer put it, summarizing the will of his people: “Many sons, a lot of guns — that is the philosophy of the Darra people!”

        No one ever ran speculators out of town with jokes. Not trying to be a bummer though. Expose people. At the very least we’ll have dudes using phrases like “neocon butthex matrix” in everyday speech, which will disrupt the seamless zeitgeist script running through the lemmings’ heads.

        But you have to learn now that systems can’t actually be destroyed by “waking people up”. It’s a platitude of the left. Made them obnoxious, but it never beat capitalism, did it?

        White Nationalists for example have been banking on “waking people up” for, oh, SIX DECADES now, and where are we? The loathsome habitués of the storied circles of Purgat’ry and Hell have risen up and mastered the earth. Userers. Adulterers. Sodomites. Traitors of their own people. Conspirators. The slave revolt in morals all over again, the wholesale enfranchisement of everything bad, low, evil, vulgar, weak, degenerate, sterile, ugly.

        If you think this can be stopped, think again. But do have sons and collect guns. That you can do, comrade.


  5. on October 12, 2011 at 2:52 pm Maximus Aurelius

    Half of what you attribute to ‘alphaness’ is merely daddy issues – no matter her class background or social achievements, she’s just seeking to recreate the relationship she had with daddy in an effort to correct past perceived voids in her life. 100 to 1 odds daddy stepped out on mom more than once, was occasionally unemployed and let mom pay the way, and was emotionally unavailable to his daughter.

    The cruel irony is she’ll find asshole after asshole to ‘fix’ in a vain attempt to rectify these past wrongs [or as here, expend her high SMV years trying to fix the same guy], to mend this damaged self-perception, but all she’ll get is history repeating itself.

    I’ll bet her parents are still together, but as for the friend mentioned towards the end of the story, I’ll put my money on her having a similar story, except her old man left her mom at the tail end of her SMV for a much younger woman, hence her much older alpha sugar daddy, and her sharp-eyed recognition of Mr. Alpha’s presumed future treachery.

    I like and respect your opinions on game and attitude, but in my opinion it’s effectiveness is overstated in relation to hot women’s need right past wrongs using a familiar template.


    • on October 12, 2011 at 3:11 pm Maximus Aurelius

      To expand briefly, I am not saying Mr. Alpha is not alpha, or that you don’t need alpha game to get an attractive high social status woman as described above.

      I’m saying that this Mr. Alpha wouldn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell with a woman of equal looks and accomplishment who wasn’t as emotionally crippled as the woman you describe above – a woman who clearly has the emotional maturaty of a kicked dog.

      I’m sure my opinions will be widely ridiculed by the Internet Alphas and syncophants who frequent this blog so let the games begin.

      [Heartiste: Maybe. But you’d be surprised what women are capable of submitting to.]


      • I’m sure my opinions will be widely ridiculed by the Internet Alphas and syncophants who frequent this blog so let the games begin.

        It just sounds like you’ve never been around a girl in love. I do have issue with :

        wearing frayed designer jeans and an untucked tight flannel shirt over a white Hanes wifebeater that was showing through the top. Most of the other men were wearing suits.

        which sounds like the host is trying to emulate Nora Zehetner’s party with Brad Bramish. Everyone’s swell and purty, natch, but at most firms, it’s the hot girl who used to dance and now works in the mailroom who has a bf show up at a function in jeans where everyone else is wearing normal clothes. Really, what is this guy, Cliff Spab, Troy Dyer?


      • “Mr. Alpha wouldn’t have a snowball’s chance in hell with a woman of equal looks and accomplishment who wasn’t as emotionally crippled as the woman you describe above.”

        Exactly. My brother-in-law is the perfect counter-example to the man described in this post. He met my sister when she was a physics-major at BU and he was a 3L at Harvard Law. My sister was (and 13 years later, still is) smoking hot. Natural blonde, petite, huge blue eyes, tiny waist — the works. He was her first boyfriend and they got married after about 14 months of dating. She’s a housewife now and homeschools their kids. Now, my brother-in-law is pretty much a stereotypical natural alpha — 6’3″, handsome, head of the legal department at a major financial company — but he loves her about as much as is humanely possible. They read books together and all of that lovey dovey stuff that CH would call beta-behavior. But she worships the ground he walks on. I’ve never once seen her argue with him. It’s a genuinely happy marriage and completely void of all of the cat-and-mouse games and manufactured drama that you read about on this site.


      • They read books together and all of that lovey dovey stuff that CH would call beta-behavior. But she worships the ground he walks on. I’ve never once seen her argue with him. It’s a genuinely happy marriage and completely void of all of the cat-and-mouse games and manufactured drama that you read about on this site.

        You’re full of shit – and you know it.


      • Funny thing — it’s almost always bitter beta males that are intent on convincing themselves that everyone else’s relationships must be as unpleasant as theirs have been. Most of the attractive, successful men I know seem to think that it’s possible to attract women without feigning their entire personalities or destroying their partners’ self-esteem.

        [Heartiste: Alpha males will always inspire better behavior from women than will beta males.]


      • Funny thing — it’s almost always bitter beta males that are intent on convincing themselves that everyone else’s relationships must be as unpleasant as theirs have been. Most of the attractive, successful men I know seem to think that it’s possible to attract women without feigning their entire personalities or destroying their partners’ self-esteem.

        You must be a woman.


      • Most of the attractive, successful men I know seem to think that it’s possible to attract women without feigning their entire personalities or destroying their partners’ self-esteem.

        Real men, alpha or high beta, do not ‘feign’ their ‘entire personalities’ on any woman, since these traits are largely genetic and come rather natural to them.

        Secondly, they do not wish to ‘destroy’ their partner’s self-esteem – perhaps just bring it down a notch or two – since most American White women all think of themselves as minor celebrities, no matter how fat or objectively unattractive they may individually be.

        How about the many more women who destroy (or at least attempt to) the self-esteem of the men in their lives?

        Get lost


      • I hope you’re a woman. It’s completely understandable for a woman to expend mental energy constantly reading blogs laden with topics with which she vehemently disagrees, and then put even more energy into writing very carefully researched rebuttals based mostly on anecdotal data derived from the lives of people in her circle of concern, which completely ignores the sequoia sized body of research and information of the blog and instead focuses like a laser beam on the NAWALT leaf on the ground close by.

        I expect that from a woman – shit, they’re just wired that way. But I don’t expect it at all from a man.

        Not at all.



      • That describes my marriage closely. I still have to use game to maintain this level of devotion. I bet your BiL does too, its just not apparent to you. It also helps if the woman involved has good values and Christian women often do.


    • Forget about that freudian pop psychobullshit. Embrace game and evo psych.
      Daddy issues weigh very little compared to the deep instinct of complete surrender to a higher status male. Money for monetary status, power for social status, assholery for psychological status.

      Upfront assholery is not the ideal way to pickup a woman, it’s better to mix it with sprinkles of charm, mystery and humor. But the only way to keep a woman around and insure her sexual loyalty, is to treat her like a piece of crap.
      Anticuckoldry is very high on a man’s evolutionary task list. Be a relentless, ruthless charming asshole or be like the ignorant masses who believe that women are not monogamous by nature and “mistakes do happen”.


      • strongly agree w everything except this:

        “But the only way to keep a woman around and insure her sexual loyalty, is to treat her like a piece of crap.”

        a firm hand does not necessarily require abuse…


      • I’m not into anti-abuse moralism. I would only agree because emotional abuse can backfire. And the whole asshole game concept is borderline abuse if you ask me.
        But that’s not exactly what i meant. “Treating her like if she was inferior” would be closer to my thoughts.


      • “But that’s not exactly what i meant. “Treating her like if she was inferior” would be closer to my thoughts.”

        fair enough, but i don’t view women, celebrities, or whatever as superior/inferior. everyone has their strengths and weaknesses. the second you assume or act as if a woman is “inferior”, you risk the hubris that is counterproductive in the longer term. women are just the yin to our yang. and the second you act like you are better (even as a game tactic), chances are theyll see through it and try and one-up you.

        as for asshole game being abuse, it depends on how you define abuse and what the context is. whether hair pulling is abuse depends on the context; there are some cases where girls love it:)


      • Firstly, totally agree with @Matador about treating women like a piece of crap – that is the only moral way to treat a woman, in my opinion. However, that does NOT make women inferior – a woman is what she is, she is as much God’s creation as a man is – agree with @Student on the yin and yang bit.


      • on October 12, 2011 at 9:37 pm drunicusequus

        Not inferior so much as different.
        Men engineer, assemble, and repair their minivans, SUV’s or beloved leased Beemer. We build their spotless little condos or dream McMansion. And we run,by and large, the banks and investment firms and manufacturers and stores that provide women with, well, everything.
        In return they birth and raise the next generation of humans.
        And we impregnate them, protect them, and (mostly) provide support and adult supervision. And if they get fat, bitchy, and sexless, we should leave.


      • Men>Women>Children>Animals.

        Men and women are complementary for reproduction and child rearing purposes. But that’s about it…
        There’s a reason why patriarchy thrived for a long time, there’s a reason why women’s sexuality has been repressed for that long. Women cannot make sound choices when it comes to the most important decision in their lives: the choice of a mate.
        Women are guided by ancient attraction triggers that are not adapted to post-cavemen life. They are obsolete machines that require round-the-clock vigilance. Their brains may have decently evolved (not to the point of winning the fields medal or a parallel parking contest), but their vaginas are stuck in the caves.

        Their attraction towards assholes is laughable from a male point of view, women may find our preference for T&A distateful, but not utterly nonsensical. And now that women are getting what they truly want (everything but a dutiful nice beta), leaving us with no choice but to adapt, we’ll see how it goes. No need for a crystal ball, just take a look at west africa.

        Women are inferior in the sense that their desires are destructive. And it’s an irony that they find primal satisfaction in being treated as such.


      • @Matador

        “Women are guided by ancient attraction triggers that are not adapted to post-cavemen life. They are obsolete machines that require round-the-clock vigilance. Their brains may have decently evolved (not to the point of winning the fields medal or a parallel parking contest), but their vaginas are stuck in the caves.

        Their attraction towards assholes is laughable from a male point of view, women may find our preference for T&A distateful, but not utterly nonsensical. And now that women are getting what they truly want (everything but a dutiful nice beta), leaving us with no choice but to adapt, we’ll see how it goes. No need for a crystal ball, just take a look at west africa.”

        What if I told you that female attraction mechanisms are a frighteningly accurate for long term survival? Is this truth too disquieting to consider? Men of our era are raised believing that stable civilization is the natural state of man. On an evolutionary time scale, our modern western world is but an ethereal deja vu, fading so quickly that even memory of the event eludes us. Female attraction mechanisms have survived the rise and fall of countless societies; they are not fooled by our countless promises of peace and stability. Females have evolved to select for males that guarantee survival in the average human condition: the Serengeti. When this iteration of civilization fails, you better believe that the Dark Triads will be the most likely survivors. Currently, they run the world, but allow the rest of men to subside due to societal abundance.

        When you begin to understand that all of your latent fears, all of the nonsense about Illuminati and Stonemasons, are actually grasps in the dark by blind men who cannot fully grasp the disquieting reality that results from the evolution of man…

        Well, I shall leave the choice to you. Once you see, you cannot unsee.


      • @ Dark Triumvir,

        It gets complicated. I dig what you’re saying. Women’s instincts are perfectly tuned for survival, but unfit for civilizational progress. And civilization is only a social construct that was never meant to be anyway, a smokescreen that was designed to fool women into giving some to the unfit males. Fine.

        My point is that any LTR that gets past the limerence stage, falls automatically under a civilizational frame. And under this frame, men got the edge, they are superior, because if women are hardwired to select the fit males, men are hardwired to build something in order to impress them bitches.
        Women are the gatekeepers of sex and their hindbrains are fit for the survival of the species, men are the gatekeepers of commitment and their hindbrains are fit for the advancement of the species.

        Who’s superior, who’s inferior… we may get into a relativist philosophical debate. But my initial point remains the same, if you want to keep the woman around for more than a few months, assume that she is inferior and treat her accordingly.


      • @ DarkTriumvir
        “Female attraction mechanisms have survived the rise and fall of countless societies; they are not fooled by our countless promises of peace and stability.”

        This is absolutely correct. These female mechanisms are much older than homo sapiens, even. These are common for all higher mammals at the very least, and possibly all mammals. The basic facts of life on this planet are such that females (the more precious gender) have to find ways to continue the species at the expense of males (the more expendable gender). The ways of females – all higher mammalian females – are now clear (earlier they were hidden): robbery of men’s wealth and cuckoldry. *All* women, no exceptions, are both thieves and whores.

        Now, despite this, women do possess reason (except they find it almost impossible to use, its there nevertheless). So perhaps the future may not be like the past. The question is: will women use their (god-given) reason? Hence, the SH*T test – Samson’s Hypergamy Test (TM).


      • @ Dark Triumvir

        You know what, you’re abso-fuckin-lutely right. Forget about my initial response, i’ve only read you superficially and jumped into writing (not-so-) dumb shit.
        Yes, it makes sense, the female hindbrain knows what it’s doing, and the dark triad traits are an undisputable evolutionary advantage.

        Suddenly, i’m more indulgent towards female hypergamy. Damn you, i’m gonna have to find a way to refuel my anger. It’s easy to slip into sentimentalism when you’re more understanding.



    • To lay the blame on “daddy issues” is cheap Freudianism. A general spiritual torpor is behind these incurable hiccups in the human condition. Hence the rush of experienced but under-educated PUAs to fill-in-the-blank with evolutionary biology, materialism, nihilism, the science of selling (see last post), and half-remembered pseudo psychoanalysis from a freshman survey course.

      Still, the daddy angle isn’t the worst one to pursue. There is a germ of truth in it. A girl’s male archetype is her father: strong, commanding, stalwart, constant, protective, providing; who gives way to her mate: adventurous, surprising, volatile, sexually complementary, high relative status. A woman cannot reconcile the archetype with the mate because they are contradictory in places. To be master means to be omnipotent; to be mate means interdependent. She must live with a permanent tension. In a pinch (e.g., the entire feminist era) she will fall back on the male type she formulated as she developed the rest of her identity, a k a, daddy.

      Men can either help them deal with this split nature, or we can exploit it. Being routed in the war of the sexes for a century makes us bloody minded and vengeful, rather like spurned betas, now that momentum is beginning its long shift back.

      Game is a sharp blade. It can be use for surgery or for slaying. Game 2.0 figures out a rapprochement with the weaker sex. Version 1.0 is unsustainable in every important way.


  6. Interesting case study. I’d be more interested to see how he got her into that position in the first place. It’s much easier to maintain that kind of dominance once you’re already in that kind of relationship. In my experience, you can’t be an a-hole like that right off the bat. Does he sweet talk the girls a little bit at first to get them interested? I mean not in a supplicating way, but as reinforcement for signs of interest. Or in other words, how can you get a girl interested right off the bat by being a total jerk?


  7. Good stuff here, and one that ought to be mandatory reading for every guy the day he buys his first jock strap.

    This is the sort of stuff that is never going to be told in (most) dating and “relationship” advice books, nor in romance movies, nor in the endless duckspeak that is television.

    But it all is stripped down to the bone, under the civilized exterior, the primal drives of homo sapiens, the underlying genetic factors at work.



  8. Does a man of that caliber wrap any girl around his finger, or just certain types of girl? Or does he only choose certain girls for his long-termers?


    • I think it goes both ways. There are in all likelihood types of women who are more susceptible to this kind of person and on those he’ll focus – bigger return for less effort.


    • usually hot ones. the reason is, hot girls are drowned by cloying betaness on an almost daily basis. hang out w a really hot girl for more than a day and youll see what i mean. assholery is a refreshing change that also triggers their biological instincts to bond with the king of the castle.


  9. I was miseducated about women from a very early age. I think my mother saw punishing me for being assertive/aggressive as some how getting revenge on the men who were stronger than her.

    Blogs like this, while slightly over the top, are hilariously right on in most cases. Keep up the good humor. You’ll need it when dealing with women.

    Women crave being dominated. When they deny it or challenge you it is only to see if you are strong enough to dominate them. If you show emotional weakness they will often hurt you for fun with a sadistic, childlike glee more fitting of a sociopath. Or they just pity you and use you for chores and money.

    Above all, catch your woman off guard. She can lie better than a politician but can’t get to you unless you let her.


  10. This is my biggest beef with women. Nearly all demand I be a total A-hole. I can be a partial one, where I know, as a matter of fact, I am right and they are wrong on some topic: art, literature, classical and jazz music, opera, European History, and other topics.

    But I could never be, and would never want to be, the guy that women burn for. The one they in fact love. That level of Alpha jerkiness is beyond me. And what is worse, is the fact that this level of Alpha jerkiness must be maintained. Constantly. Over and over again. Our fathers and grandfathers did not have to turn themselves into a grotesque jerk, an exaggerated caricature of a man, in order to have a relationship.

    I don’t think you could write a more stunning indictment on the nature and behavior and idiocy of today’s women.


    • Our grandfathers had the financial and statutory edge. That alone granted them a couple of alphaness points.

      Many men also had that patriarchal frame (strength, virtue, manliness in a King A fashion). Those displays of male power were a nice civilized ersatz of assholery to keep the women reasonably wet. But raw assholery is the ultimate gina tingle generator, because it seems like it’s more in touch with women’s animalistic desires.

      However, female nature didn’t change in the last decades, i’m sure the asshole grandpas had a blast during the 50s.


    • Unfortuneately, you must learn to be the one they burn for in today’s world. I’m not saying you can’t be tender and kind and delegate authority, but you must learn to turn the asshole in you back on when it is needed. Many if not most men do not respect assholes, but most women do. I remember a boss of mine who once said,” I’m a person who is very strict and practically an asshole to the employees under me at first so they know better than to mess with me and my authority. Then I can become nicer to them later on. If they get out of line after this I can always revert to being an asshole. If you come off as a nice guy at first, it’s virtually impossible for you to be an asshole later on. However, if you are an asshole first, you can be a nice guy later on and revert to being an asshole if needed.” Some people, usually men, you can be nice to and they will respond well. Some people, usually women, you can never be nice to. The same principle applies to women.


    • being an asshole does not mean being a bitter intellectual know-it-all (trying to win an argument with a woman outside of a courtoom is a futile exercise on multiple levels). it means having an inner strength that trumps the shit that life inevitably throws at you. being fazed by the “idiocy of … women” is the farthest thing from an alpha frame that you could possible have.


    • Good thing you hold yourself back, whiskey. I hope women don’t HATE HATE HATE you because of it.


    • @whiskey:
      women are who they are. God made them that way for whatever purpose He had in mind. We men have to simply accept them as they *actually* are, instead of pining for them to be what you might *fantasize* them to be.


      • My response would be that no, women generally did not burn for A-holes in yesteryear. There’s a whole lot of marriages (mostly to thoroughly beta males) and romance literature prior to 1965 written by and for women, that argues otherwise.

        Women before the pill and the Welfare State generally sought security, a protector, a provider, and a lifelong companion for after the sexy parts of their lives. Parts of that still live in, in jewelry ads aimed at mature women (there’s a memorable one with a mid-forties couple behind a couple in their late seventies holding hands, the wife emulates the older woman in front of her).

        Most men don’t wish to dominate women, which is why it is so difficult for them in the post-pill/Welfare world. Its why Game has to exist. If dominance over women came naturally, most men would be on it like ducks to water. This pretty much shouts that in the West at least (and that’s backed up by genetic studies) being an A-hole did not gain reproductive advantage, rather male reproduction was spread out, not just among Kings and princelets (which given Western history makes sense — your fighting men won’t fight for you if you hog all their women, or even one). See Strongbow, Ireland, Norman Invasion.

        The behavior Roissy describes is … unnatural. Which is why it is so remarkable. No one remarks on a mother’s love for her infant, its expected as the natural state of affairs.


      • “There’s a whole lot of marriages (mostly to thoroughly beta males) and romance literature prior to 1965 written by and for women, that argues otherwise.”

        Like Wuthering Heights?


        but no i agree with you. feminism is a memetic disorder.


      • on October 13, 2011 at 12:16 pm The Chrome Microphone

        Domination of women comes naturally to some, not others

        Society has changed and women with it

        We have less to offer women materially and security-wise than before, so innate qualities such as dominance are more valued

        We have to adapt to a more level socioeconomic playing field since the odds were artificially skewed years ago

        A-holishness was always valued

        Romance novels always incorporate the emotional rollercoaster that women crave

        They just neglect to mention how consistently it’s required


      • on October 13, 2011 at 1:44 pm driveallnight

        Just read the book, “A Billion Wicked Thoughts.” For female romance, the emotional rollercoaster is the coin of the realm.


      • @whiskey:
        First, nothing personal here. I have been reading your posts here and elsewhere on the web for many years before I started posting here; you make good points often, and I have learnt from your posts in the past.

        Second, to your point above. Lets remember that the brief period of time when betas were ascendant (after the invention of agriculture and religion) was too brief to have much evolutionary impact. The fact is that about half the male population in any generation is doomed evolutionarily (the evidence of this is in the genes each of us carries). And it is women’s job to ensure that the genes carried by 50% of males are efficiently destroyed, all the while ruthlessly robbing those said 50% of males of all their money, assets, and all other resources.

        Speaking personally, Game helped me find my inner caveman (I did not know he existed for many relationships over a couple of decades before); our host has helped me find my inner asshole (I did not know he existed earlier either). Now, I am not sure all men have their inner analogs to those I found. To someone who doesnt, Game and this blog would naturally sound un-natural. I guarantee you that until I was screwed over by my ex, and had to learn what I did wrong lest I repeat it again (and thus found Game and the Community), I would have disagreed with every word written on this blog.


      • on October 13, 2011 at 1:56 am (r)Evoluzione

        Their “idiocy” makes it possible to utilize observations based on evolutionary theory, in order to get their pants.

        It’s not a bug. It’s a feature.

        Men in these type blogs never cease to amaze me with their vitriol towards women. But I was once mad too. Been hurt too many times. Once bitten, twice shy.

        But the fact remains that feminism, and women’s lib, is the reason we can rack up notch counts to counter those of woodpeckers. Yes it makes them bitches on some level, and sluts too, but hey, we like sluts. Except to marry.


      • Agree with @revoluzione: We men love these whores. We have no choice, really. As our host has said, love is the only thing that’s worth a damn in this short life that each of us has on this planet. The fact that love is just a biochemical reaction triggered in us reasonable men by these whores (AWALT) is no bar to the feelings women trigger in us. Pump’em and Dump’em helps some, but not a lot.

        And yes, that’s why no man should ever marry – why marry a slut? Even if she was a virgin when you married her, she will sleep with a higher-alpha behind your back the first chance she gets (she has no choice really, its automatic). Yes, you can mate-guard her, of course. But no marriage, and only pumps-and-dumps are the best logical conclusions.


    • Nearly all demand I be a total A-hole. I can be a partial one…

      Lollloooozzzzzllolazoozlalalooozallollol….. (to paraphrase GBFM)

      *Whiskey, I thought you were, in your own words, a ‘supa-dupa-beta’?!? (nothing personal of course Whis, since I like you lots, and your insights are always interesting and informative)


    • I am with Whiskey on this one.I have also dated ..well not an Ivy but an Oxbridge chick when I was unemployed and she had a boyfriend-a ultra macho ex military fellow!But…that was rather clandestine and even though I was broke and could “live off her earnings” if I chose to, I did not as living off a woman makes me physically ill.
      I dont mind her occasionally paying me while on dates but being a “kept man”??… blechhhhh!
      Just because you CAN do something doesnt mean you SHOULD!

      This is one of the problems I have with game (which celebrates the ends justifies the means) is that it absolutely destroys character.


      • A man’s character is not dependent on a woman’s nature. Game is an honest endeavor.


      • The end does justify the means, because in the end what did it matter that you had character when your alpha neighbor had 20 children and you died without passing on your genes? What good did that do for you besides giving you your own personal satisfaction? That’s why honor and morality when it comes to sex and romance is a crock of crap. It opens you up to be taken advantage of by people who do what it takes to get what they want.


  11. @ maximus

    you speak of a womans emotional maturity as if that is a quality we should look for when trying to fuck a girl?


  12. CH, this is interesting. Little bits of game-relevant epiphanies are scattered throughout.

    “One of Walsh’s pet observations pertains to what she calls the “soft harem,” where high-status men (i.e., the football captain) maintain an “official” girlfriend as well as a rotating roster of neo-concubines, who service him in the barroom bathroom or wherever the beer is flowing. “There used to be more assortative mating,” she explained, “where a five would date a five. But now every woman who is a six and above wants the hottest guy on campus, and she can have him—for one night.”



    • The anti-thesis of this article would be my Bible. I think I’ll take a stab at writing it.


      • on October 13, 2011 at 1:57 am (r)Evoluzione

        There was a similar indicting satire of a magazine piece here a while back. It was a worthwhile, hilarious read. I’d be stoked to read your antithetical version, AB. Do post links if/when you get that up on your blog.


  13. I really appreciated the level of observation and perception that you put into the experience and am very grateful that you shared it and how you shared (wrote) it. Concrete experience is very useful (certainly to me) in building a better game state. This article is really useful, you hit this one out of the park. Outstanding.


    • Second @JohnDark. Our host hit this one out of the park – there is no substitute for concretes demonstrated through a perceptive description.


  14. My fiancée displays all this body language when I do something that’s meaningful to her—like spending time with her family. You don’t have to be an asshole to experience this.


    • If she’s doing it while her family is around it may just be to sell you to them. Lots of women become very doting when planning to leave you, or cheating on you, or if another woman is around that might try to steal you.

      It’s your reactions to her behavior not her emoting that is the sign of alphaness. Go ahead and keep showing a soft underbelly, see if it works out for you. Just don’t be surprised when she tears into that soft exterior.


    • Holy shit missed the fiance bit, to quote Kanye.

      “We want prenup YEAAAAH”


    • Oh don’t worry, she said you were a lovely guy… while she was sucking my dick.


    • lolz…


  15. This is why I read this blog everyday. It reminds me of the “id” in females that nobody talks about and is so important.


  16. Brilliant post. This is the CH of old. Vintage, genius, whimsical, and most of all, razor in its precise unveiling of the truth.


  17. You’ve got to consider publishing in a serious way. The quality of your prose has improved dramatically since you started the blog and stands head and shoulders above other ‘Game’ material. You would make a mint.


    • Would also draw heavy fire from the Kosher Klub. And lose. For this reason I’m afraid I have to enlist in the Don’t Publish ranks. This is social commentary that strikes at the heart of the cancerous beast that is our nation, not a gimmick. Books are gimmicks.

      Instead do what I do: print out articles +/- commentary, take them to Staples and have them spiral-bound. Yea yea that’s gay, but I don’t like to sit at the computer ALL day.

      But I suppose if the writer or writers were ever down in their luck, releasing a book would make a quick zillion zogbux.


  18. So speaketh the Alpha Buddah, Corey Worthington, in 2009.


    Defining what constitutes an Alpha frame seems like the most repetitive theme in the manosphere, but it needs to be done. Alpha is a state of being, not a demographic.


    • Saw this long ago, but still watch it time and again just to refresh. The tv poodle broad keeps trying to exercise authority, back the guy up, shame him….but he never loses frame. And at the end, it’s only *her* that’s agitated. Outstanding.


  19. There’s a difference between being a total dick, and a charming asshole (the kind dumb women go, ‘I hate that I love him’), which your story seems to imply the guy is the former. All I know is, I’ve seen enough women dump their guys for being jerks. Way more so then dumping them because they are ‘beta’.

    I know enough miserable men who are total scumbags who women wont go near. Point being, you always seem to stress the point that being a dick attracts women. That aspect of flare, charm, ‘game’, or whatever you want to call it, is needed as well.


    • All I know is, I’ve seen enough women dump their guys for being jerks. Way more so then dumping them because they are ‘beta’.

      Another newbie.

      *Care to prove your contention, fellow anon…?


    • But who is getting the most sex for the least amount of effort?


  20. Asshole game replicates the parent-child dynamic.

    That’s its hook.

    With ever more broken homes America has become a fount of hot, hurt XX souls who want to relive that special time before the ugly divorce.

    This dynamic is ten-a-penny in porn/ stripping.

    Any intelligent man can adopt this frame by simply acting parentally — and treating the hot babe as if she’s a silly 13 year-old.

    The aloofness gambit forces her needy soul to go on an attention-seeking campaign — of which one should give random regal affirmations while mostly ignoring her.

    Irregular positive-feedback triggers compulsive behaviors in all primates.

    Betas defeat this impulse by being predictably affirmative. Such behavior is noxious to women. It takes all of the sport out of her sex.

    It’s far, far better to have unsteady terms and conditions. Such uncertainty is crack for the hamster. Women are hard-wired for social proof — both as a gauge of acceptance in her circles — and for acceptance by her lover.

    The man should always strive for her respect — as against her love. She can love her children and her pets — she must respect her mate.

    In contrast, the male should love his babe — but never cross the line into respect. To so stray will unleash many evils — such as debating anything serious at all. Women are very much happier if they are never drawn into intellectual affairs — it’s too unfeminine.

    Such matters are best left for menopausal years.

    Mating is far more important than solving the world’s problems.


  21. Imagine her enthusiasm for him if he:

    1) dressed like a man

    2) was rich

    3) had a high status job


  22. It was probably a wedding.

    Not sure I agree with maximus aurelius above that the woman in question is “emotionally damaged” or with negative “daddy issues” as usually understood. But I’ve written before here that the gender roles and behaviors absorbed in childhood from one’s parents play a powerful role in forming our expectations and desires in a relationship. More specifically, girls want a man like daddy and men a girl like the one who married dear old dad. In this case, the high-achieving brilliant beauty may have had an aloof, masculine father (distinct from emotionally cold or abusive) and so she seeks those same qualities in a mate. If so, this kind of childhood hindbrain conditioning explains the contrast between her mate choice and the rest of her life. Other women, from more feminist households (meek father, domineering mother) might think it more natural to pair with the SWPL herb type. (note: what happened to the “herb” abuse that used to be such a big part of this blog?) For men, this may explain why some tend to go for ostensibly repellent women- it’s how mom was to dad- how she treated him is what they expect and crave, at some level. Just a theory, thrown out for discussion.


    • Actually, I heard of this too. A friend of mine had an abusive dad, and she told me this theory. That if you didn’t have a good father, you would grow up and look for a man who would substitute him, but since the abusive father is all you knew, you will also be attracted to men who are like him. So you end up liking jerks. She never dated a jerk though.

      So if you had a good father, your father needs are satisfied and you don’t look for a father when looking for a boyfriend. This is at least confirmed by myself, as I had a wonderful father, and the guys I like are nothing like him (that is, my dad was an alpha and I like cute betas).

      I don’t have any proof for this theory and don’t exactly believe it, but I thought I’d mention it.


      • it’s understood “your friend” grew up in an abusive relationship (and she has our true sympathy and best wishes), but she must learn to cut the cord and fly with her own wings onto the summits of mountains yet undreamed of


      • I know, but it seems surprisingly hard :C


  23. Russian men – the distant, rarely-smiling, dominating body language is a turn-on. If an American guy wants a real-life model on whom to base their attitude, find a Russian guy fresh off the boat to befriend.

    The guy in this story sounds Russian, in my mind.


  24. Barbarism, here we come!


  25. I agree, but I think this is more akin to a trap of sorts. Once a man has trapped a woman into submitting to his charms, it is just a matter of continuing to isolate her from him enough so she gets drawn in an then push her away so she comes back for more. She ends up making a fool of herself, but has too much pride to see it, pure brilliance.


  26. “for her barbs were sharp and subtle enough to avoid triggering a hen phalanx of social diplomacy.”

    Brilliant. I have never seen this concept articulated but know exactly what you mean. Some know how to walk the tightrope of plausible deniability.

    A fine piece of writing. You know it’s a winner when the first wave of comments are already brimming with haters.

    I read this blog to improve my writing just as much as to improve my game.


  27. Why is it so difficult for an average guy to come to terms with the very observable, eminently predictable, fact that women idealize the apex Alpha asshole as the most desirable of males? After I’d gotten to the bottom of this post I knew what to expect as a response – disqualification of the girl.

    It’s so polarizing and counterintuitive to our egos that the truth of it would necessarily have to be refuted in order to preserve them. “She must be a low-quality, LSE, daddy-issues girl to so flagrantly fawn over a guy who’s indifference borders on hostility.” Every woman will crow in agreeance and even lesser Alphas will hum along with the tune. No woman worth her salt would ever deal with an abuser of that nature,…

    Uh, yeah, they would. In fact self-respecting women will with such frequency and predictability that it instills a sense of dread in men’s very belief system. Women will deny this extreme Alpha preference because it better serves their sense of hypergamy, but men reject it because it’s such a stark contrast to what they’ve been conditioned to believe about women from childhood on.

    Like Whiskey illustrates here, precious few men can embrace that idealized degree of Alpha indifference after a lifetime of being taught to be caring, attentive, devoted, sensitive, etc., and all the other pro-social personal attributes that women say are important. And they still are important, to the greater whole of a functioning society – they’re just not factors in arousal that comes even close to the effect of an idealized Alpha indifference. It’s uncomfortable to accept that this is what women – average women, damaged women, and “women of integrity” – provably desire in their men, so the default response is to disqualify the woman involved. It’s just too terrible to contemplate.


    • on October 12, 2011 at 5:24 pm Maximus Aurelius

      Just as many sexually abused children grow up to become abusers themselves, so do young girls with asshole fathers like Mr. Alpha grow up to become involved with assholes like Mr. Alpha. They are drawn to him, like moths to a flame. The biology is undeniable.

      However, many women who don’t have such issues would see Mr. Alpha for the white trash asshole clown he is.


      • White trash?ho said he was white? Oh wait,he was laid off his job and now lives off the girl. If he was not white he wouldve skipped the job in the 1st place and gone directly to living off the girl.


      • “However, many women who don’t have such issues would see Mr. Alpha for the white trash asshole clown he is.”

        look, you either get it, or you don’t. how do you know hes white trash? he dresses not unlike hollywood a-listers or fortune 500 heirs often do at similar social occasions. many self-employed entrepreneurs w endless cash have the same or similar style and to the avg eye look woefully out of place.

        as for “dad was a jerk, therefore the BF is as well…” I know and know of many white-collar church-going girls who dig the asshole as much as the stripper types do.


      • “look, you either get it, or you don’t. how do you know hes white trash?” dresses not unlike hollywood a-listers or fortune 500 heirs often do at similar social occasions.

        You don’t need to know the description of his clothing before you can determine that he’s white trash. The description of his behavior at a formal social setting would be enough to arrive at this conclusion.


      • what makes you say it was a “formal social setting”? alphas gfs cocktail dress indicates it was not necessarily a “formal social setting”. given the ass-grabbing and other PDA along w the fact that “*Most* of the other men were wearing suits” it strikes me as more of a business casual event. my guess is a fundraiser or launch party.

        in any case, u should try and get out more. the same people i mention the post u quoted are not always as prim and proper as u may think. even i-bankers and other white collar types often act inappropriately in more formal surroundings. the alpha in this story was quite well behaved, especially considering the petty annoyances he was being subject to.


      • on October 13, 2011 at 2:04 am (r)Evoluzione

        @Student–exactly correct.

        Those comenters crying white trash apparently haven’t spend much time with the proles as of late. Therefore, those comenters are likely to be hipster SWPLs engaged in more status jockeying. You can’t make yourself more alpha by bringing down someone else who is more dominant and confident than you are, especially on the internet. AMOG fail.


      • “the same people i mention the post u quoted are not always as prim and proper as u may think. even i-bankers and other white collar types often act inappropriately in more formal surroundings. ”

        I never said they did. I don’t give a -F what job title you’re talking about. It’s still white trash. I’ll give them more leeway than someone acting similarly without the same title, but it’s still trash, just somewhat less so. Besides investment bankers don’t have a monopoly on intellectual capital.


      • “Therefore, those comenters are likely to be hipster SWPLs engaged in more status jockeying. You can’t make yourself more alpha by bringing down someone else who is more dominant and confident than you are,”

        I’m not trying to out-alpha anyone. I’m female. Status jockeying. Yeah, that’s right. Because slapping on a label of investment banker or corporate exec or whatever else you pick doesn’t equal intellectual superiority.


    • @Rollo Tomassi:
      “it instills a sense of dread in men’s very belief system.”
      It does not have to. Reality comes first, all else has to be based on reality. One has to accept women for the kind of being they are, there is no point in trying to change reality just by wishing it really hard. Yes, we can tame the Niagara into producing power (Tesla actually did this), but it did not happen merely by wishing it were so. And we can change women too (should we want to, that is), but not by merely wishing it were so.

      Not that I am trying to change women or anything, but *one* possible way to that goal would be Samson’s Hypergamy Test (TM):
      If a woman has the power of reason, she can demonstrate it by sleeping only with men she finds UNattractive.


      • Again, Samson, and with all respect to the desire to fashion misogynistic axioms, I must say you have that wrong.

        The psychology of the woman who prefers grossly unfit types is anything but rational. It isn’t reason that compels the beta-hound into the flabby arms of the gamer / Renaissance festival fanatic. It is extremely low self-esteem.

        And again, the only truly rational woman in this respect is the one banging an old man for his fortune.


      • @uh:

        We are not in disagreement – I am slowly groping my way toward the proper formulation of the SH*T test, though I am confident I have the fundamentals correct.

        What I mean by UNattractive is the classic beta – not too confident, a little shy, a little unsure of himself around women, maybe a little nerdy – you know the kind that women HATE HATE HATE. If a woman sleeps with that kind of UNattractive man, she passes the SH*T test.


      • I see. Well, that is another animal.

        Reminds me of this awesome indie broad in my neighborhood in Portland … name was ~*Sage*~, no lie. Short haircut, long pale legs, most memorable I’ve ever seen which she flaunted mercilessly in tiny forest green jean shorts.

        Her boy, and I use the possessive and diminutive deliberately, was the type you describe. It’s only these vegan indie broads who go for it, but it’s something that can’t be faked. You must BE the short, pale waif in tight black jeans and loafers. Any bit of muscle will rule you out.

        Highly exclusive subrace, those kids. I wonder if L’Heartiste would have anything to say about this. Can the frail vegan girl who ostensibly goes only for frail vegan boys be gamed?


  28. Best post in a long time. The “new study confirms game” posts were getting old. I struggle with how much of an asshole I should be in day to day life. It certainly works on the girls but can damage your image at work and relationships with other men.


  29. “It’s just too terrible to contemplate.” 100% true. I used to be this way. Everything changes when you just sit back and start laughing your ass off at the hilarity of it all.



  30. It bears repeating: Nice Guy was redefined from meaning someone with class that doesn’t push others around, to pathetic wimp who no one with self esteem would want.

    Nice Guys* are classic betas. They are alwasy playing second fiddle to the alphas but can still have a bit of happiness picking up seconds and being wing men for their alpha friends. They tend get the less pretty of the crop when they do get some.

    (*Beware of the total jerk, small muscles, ugly and a loser male who claims to be a “Nice Guy.” He simply does not have the strength or social standing to be as much of a jerk as he both is and wants to display. These guys are a dime a dozen at sausage parties. If he is being nice it is usually because he has to in order to be permitted access to a social scene.)

    Ever noticed how the Alpha Male (dominant) or Alpha Female (highly desireable) often has an ugly friend or two whom they are very good friends with?

    This is actually a socially symbiotic relationship. The Alpha gets a companion for backup who can not realistically challenge them for a mate. The ugly friend gets the benefit of hanging out with Alphas who would never give them the time of day otherwise.


    • All my guy friends are significantly more attractive than me — taller, more chiseled face, better build, wealthier. I still typically lead the group. Then again, I think I’m the odd man out here because the alphas I know tend to have their male orbiter fans always. All my hot female friends have a few ugly orbiter cockblockers, too.

      Even so, I think it’s natural for top tier humans to build a flock of followers. As Jesus/GBFM proves.


  31. Unrelated comment, regarding the pill

    Say what you want about the pill, but hear this. A period can be delayed up to a week by deviating from the prescription, but the period that eventually comes is heavy and painful. A sure fire way to know your game is tight is if a girl deliberately alters her pill prescription to avoid having a period while you’re in town. More so if she admits this to you. Even more so if she doesn’t complain about the period later on. Word.


    • She may get some spotting, but no, that’s not accurate: http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/womens-health/WO00069


    • A mere week’s delay won’t normally alter “Aunt Flo” that radically. I say normally because both the pain and the volume of the period can vary very much even for the same woman even if she’s in the natural state, so to say. In fact being on the pill makes the period less painful for most women most of the time. Maybe some little strumpet has tried to slightly overstate the things she’s willing to go through for you. 😉 But such a little thing is more endearing than anything, to be sure.


  32. a girl is usually more deferential to her boyfriend in front of her own friends and family when she knows they do not approve of him. for couples who have dated for years, expressions of love and admiration usually become less intense. the intensity of this girl’s expression might be a reflection of her unease with the situation.

    just a thought.


  33. First,great post,well-written and I ate up every word! So do you think the last girl would actually impale her turgid rainforest of love on the shimmering alpha staff of the douchebag? That the other girls hated him is so cool. The undercurrent of desire:bitchin’!


  34. In my experience 100% asshole won’t work long term. However, 85% asshole with a sprinkling of charm, humor, and the occasional preplanned moment where you show some “weakness” (don’t overdo it) will keep a high value female with minimal emotional issues completely under your spell indefinitely.

    If the guy is truly a 100 percenter in the asshole department, she’ll ditch him sooner or later if she’s even slightly emotionally stable.


  35. It all comes down to biology (well, biology culture, but biology is in the driver’s seat): women are attracted to the sorts of men their mothers were attracted to. If you look across society, you’ll notice that different races and socio-economic classes show different levels of preference for the ‘Alpha asshole’ described here. Of course, all women are attracted to status, but ‘status’ means different things to different; status may come from delivering the most brutal beat-down if you’re a thug leader in the ghetto, or it may come from closing the biggest business merger if you’re in a circle of upper-class businesspeople. I don’t think all women are attracted to the sort of men described above, but I do acknowledge that it has been a successful breeding strategy, particularly for certain races/classes.

    As far as attitude goes, from my experience, upper-middle and upper class Western women have traditionally been attracted to men who can lead effectively, through personal resolve, drive, focus, self-respect, and single-minded devotion to a specific cause. I don’t think the asshole above had any of those traits.

    Remember, women aren’t all the same, just as races aren’t all the same; why would you think they all have the same definition of status?


    • Blah, blah, blah. Bottom line is they don’t deserve all the effort. Hence mimicking alphadom, while costly, does at least keep one free of the cuckold’s hook & sinker.


  36. I wear wife beaters regularly even at the office, because they fit and I don’t really care. My clients find it hilarious (guys) or sexy (women) because I have a body fat % of around 8-9%. I wish I could wear casual shirts, but if they’re not tailored, they’re too loose. It looks comical.

    When I’m at an event or gala, I wear a suit (tailored) but I prefer euro sport brands (Emporio Armani, etc) because they’re made for athletic builds. That stands out constantly as women will open me asking about my jacket or shoes (always leather sole bespoken even in winter). It’s not about style, though, it’s about fit — if your clothes are uncomfortable, you’ll act it out.

    I’m probably 75% “asshole”, 15% distracted and 10% randomly adoring. I tend not to date 8.5s LTR though — I keep those gals in the long distance harem for sport. I also don’t live near good elk hunting or fantastic beaches, but I do those things almost every month.

    Keep the sweet gal close and the hottest ones primed and ready for when you want to see them.


    • …and I can never recall any of my dames’ female friends liking me. But after a breakup, guess who always wants to get drinks and catch up?


      • im in a very similar boat as you in terms of style and attitude, and its taken me far from where i initially was before i understood the angles.

        as for the second comment, i take the condescension of my gfs friends as a compliment. i have noticed, that ideal female types (especially attractive and socially and emotionally stable) tend to respect the alpha male vibe, whereas beta girls (usually lessers on the looks and stability scale) throw off the bitchy, catty vibe and act in a way described in the OP. my theory is that lesser girls recognize their relative status, and rather than accept where they are at, fight it by using their cunning to try and undermine the alpha frame and/or make their lovestruck girlfriend “see the light”. its a way of making themselves feel better about not being where they wish they were at.


      • The social neg against their cattiness gets them wet, which gets your dame wetter.

        I end up appreciating myself more because of having the knowledge that women are absolute monsters — even the sweetest ones. Second to that are beta males.

        Us real men? We’re the best thing to happen to the world, and it’s a good feeling to know we’ll save society.


      • out of curiosity A.B., what makes you say that you consider even the sweetest women to be “absolute monsters”? its odd to me because it seems so contradictory to how youve expressed urself thus far.


      • The #1 in my life (ranked against women, not activities or people in general) is top notch, but she still needs some time out every few months. Put the best woman with her man in a group of spinsters-to-be and you can see the inner demon come out and play.

        Note that I like monsters. They didn’t scare me as a kid, and the most notorious mass murderers always seem to be the sweetest or most loved types.

        Even the sweetest gals I’ve known still shit tested, still tried to use word games and mind games subconsciously to “get their way” (read: get the man to take control).


      • ah ok. i thought ‘monsters’ implied a certain type of animosity, which is clearly not the case. i think of girls & their games as cute little terrors.

        meaning, shit tests are cute (& if played right they cause hypertrophic attraction), but if you fail enough of them, they can be catastrophic.


  37. But here’s the question I ask: do you really want to be that guy? Surely I am not the only man who is repulsed by his behavior.

    I don’t care if acting that way gets me a million bucks or a million women. The way he treats her and the people around her is just abhorrent. Being a decent person who makes life better and who people genuinely like (not just a narrow age of young women) is more important to me.


    • Every time i read you, i sense that you’re gonna start to cry.
      Next time, please cry all your tears out before posting, maybe the result would be manlier.


    • He IS treating her decently.

      He is making her happy.

      Yes, you can learn to behave like that, and you can learn to internalize that behavior, and to feel good about yourself behaving that way.

      He’s not hurting anyone. He’s acting in a way that gives positive feedback and positive vibes.


      • If you’re talking about a girl with the pride and self-assurance of a doormat (reference to my own post below), then yes – you are making her happy.
        Please don’t underestimate the intellectual capacity of the woman you’re doing this to. (I know this sentence will seem “oxymornic” to most of you as woman and intellectual can’t be seen together) but try to get over that and understand, that while these tactics are all fantastic, the frequency of their use should be relative to the woman. The “Anonymous” post above had the right idea. Can’t be 100% asshole all the time.


      • Agree with @xsplat: treating someone in consonance with their own nature is decent. And in this case, treating a woman as her nature demands she be treated (in other words, like total crap) *will* and *does* make her happy.


    • Those who don’t practice game will come to ruin amongst those who do.

      You’re projecting your male point of view on to women. Someone treating you, a man, in such a cruel way would make you feel awful. But you are no women and the behavior that satisfies her is not meant to satisfy you.

      Clearly she loves such treatment. Can’t you see that? Couldn’t we call you cruel for knowing what a women truly craves and not giving it to her?


      • “Those who don’t practice game will come to ruin amongst those who do.”

        I would just add “[try] to ruin….


      • F’d up my original reply.

        Point is I agree with Dan Fletcher’s statement. It’s a common occurence here at CH. The ones who post and cry and dispute game truths are ones who don’t practice game or have tried and failed.


      • I’m not limiting my point of view to women. Young attractive women make up a very small percentage of the population, and some number less than 100%, regardless of what is published here, are attracted to this sort of man.

        If 5% of the population consists of women who will be enamored by such jerks, then the other 95% consists of men, older women, and kids who will not be impressed by this behavior. Is it really worth acting like a jerk to 95% of people even if 5% of people will be made happy? Shouldn’t you try to bring happiness to 95% of people rather than 5%?


    • quintin3265 is falling for the same error the gamers (and game-poseurs) fall for. An error that has become an article of the faith in the “manosphere.”

      “The way he treats her and the people around her is just abhorrent. Being a decent person who makes life better and who people genuinely like (not just a narrow age of young women) is more important to me.”

      You don’t have to be “repuls[ive]” and “abhorrent,” but it helps … if you have no ability to affect any other kind of dominance. Theirs is a blinkered mentality that ultimately derives from laziness. Their dads did not teach them how to display strength without gratuitously and counter-productively damaging other people.

      Some of the third-rate fanboys will ride this bluff to its extreme — see comments to your post above. They defend “abhorrent behavior” itself by redefining it as somehow good or “decent.” It is an open question whether the behavior of the dreamy fellow who so dazzled Roissy’s attention is abhorrent. (I tend to think not. If anything such behavior is simply slovenly.) Whether it was shoddy treatment or not, it should be regarded as superfluous.

      We have lost the art of gentlemanliness. We’ve dismembered it into the “gentle” and the “manly.” The wimpy-losers and the strong assholes. Both feminists and PUAs make the same claim: that the gentle and the manly are contradictory forces, that you must choose one or the other. This an error. Granted, there are few with an ability to contain the two, there are no cultural pressures attempting to reconcile the two, and there won’t be. There is no need to be a man in full since the threshold to vajj has never been lower and bottom-notch game suffices.

      Do rock stars and A-list actors and politicians rack up trim because they’re assholes? If they are jerks it is incidental and irrelevant to their magnetism. Valorizing repugnant behavior is small ball for bush league players.

      But then this site is largely focused on raising chump walk-ons to single-A rather than guiding men to the majors. In a different era, the baseline male would not be starting at beta/omega chumpdom but rather nascent leadership. So this topic will remain permanently controversial here.


      • You miss the point. Modern women don’t deserve that ideal man that you’re talking about. Have you been out lately? The ladies that you think women are are long gone, and not coming back.
        Chivalry and your gentlemahood relies on one tacit agreement: i will protect you if you treat me like your protector.
        Chicks nowadays don’t need a protector, they need a good fuck.


  38. It seems like the astute readers aren’t showing up early. What’s the social event?
    I would say a charity or product launching gala. But it’s far fetched, the clues are missing.


    • Sounds like a wedding to me.


    • Probably some type of work awards/banquet/launch.

      Despite a target rich environment, Heartiste is in observational mode, and not on the prowl. Likely rules out weddings, and social dinners, and speaks to the need for some type of sexual relationship firewall ie. work related. Girls don’t hate him, so they don’t know him real well, nor is he dating one of their friends. ie. work acquaintances, not friends.

      Most girls are alone, and not with men. The one referenced is dating a high value, older male, which sounds like a boss, but he isn’t at the table. Maybe he’s on the dais, networking elsewhere, or just overseeing the details of the evening. Plus she is unafraid to stir up a shitstorm, or insult others, so her man’s position is probably what is giving her immunity from consequences. If her man could fire anyone at the table, that would explain it.

      It would be interesting to know if Heartiste thought this was a genuine, innate asshole, or a normal guy pretending to be an asshole, to score with the girl, or maintain her affections. Innate assholes I’ve known, especially the lower status, unemployed ones, often do the Alpha act as part of a psychological defense. To confront what they are is agony, so they lie to everyone, themselves included. It’s the Narcissist’s false reality. They literally believe the crazy shit they say, so they won’t have to confront the horror of reality in their head.

      That this guy was laid off would point to him being this loser type of innate asshole, who adheres to asshole game out of psychological necessity. If so, you can’t believe a word they say. The ‘I’ve got a lot of money saved up for the around the world trips I’m going to take someday,’ could be total bullshit. Nariccists are terrible with money, and live from paycheck to paycheck, as they sink into debt.

      If so you could have really fucked him up by turning his chick/income source on him.

      I would have waited until asshole left, and then in a serious, even pained and confused manner say to the girl (in front of all of her friends), “Why do you let him treat you so badly? A pretty girl like you could do so much better. I could understand if he had millions of dollars, or was a genius in some field, or even if he looked like he came off the cover of GQ, but him? He’s an out of work midget of limited intellect, who ignores everything you say. If he’s with you, he should be doting on you, paying your way, getting you the drinks, and laughing at your every joke. Is there something I’m missing? Cause from where I am sitting you take a lot of coldhearted rejection and abuse just to pay the way for an asshole who is so far below you on the dating ratings scale, it’s ridiculous.”

      Look baffled, and then let it fester. Her girls would secretly love you for it, too.

      That said, this girl does likely have issues, so this probably wouldn’t work, though it’s worth a shot. Constantly apologizing for imagined slights reeks of a childhood spent seeking the attention and approval of a distant dad by inventing fake misbehavior and apologizing. If Dad says she didn’t really do bad and hugs her, it is almost as if he said she did good. It’s probably as close as she ever got to approval and affection, and now she compulsively seeks it from a male superior. Still, she might change assholes.

      There’s an important lesson to future fathers there. Praise your girl, and give her the attention she craves, lest you produce emotional/sexual fodder for assholes later on, down the road.

      I think young guys who read the comments need to understand something, though. Anybody who talks about human psychology in general, and tells you “everyone is X,” is likely talking out of their ass. It’s like a muscle magazine which advertises, “Best Quad Exercise Ever!” There is no single best exercise, because people are different. Some will grow freaky off of lunges, and some will stay bird-legged forever off lunges. The bird-legged guy may suddenly get freaky off of squats, while lunge guy watches his quads shrink off of squats.

      This is becasue people are different. I have crossed paths with a few girls who I am pretty sure would assess this asshole as un-datable. And many of the innate assholes I have known, had to spend their lives lying to themselves constantly about who and what they are, just to find a shred of shelter from the cold hard reality of how pathetic they knew they were, deep down.

      So don’t run out and be an asshole, expecting to definitely find happiness with the perfect girl. There are those who are cool with this asshole game. But there will be those who want something else, maybe even to become a genuine Alpha male who can tell anyone to go fuck themselves, because he has enough money to buy and sell the men around him, without even noticing the fluctuations in his bank account. Or an Alpha male who others look to for guidance because he genuinely knows the shit he specializes in better than anyone else around. Anybody can find something they are good at to become a genuine Alpha.

      In short, for some men, power and success is the ultimate aphrodisiac. Pretending to be powerful while disrespecting a woman, but knowing deep down you’re just playing a role and could never back it all up in a pinch, probably isn’t going to satisfy these men.

      If you fall into this latter category, find your victories, and earn your status as a genuine Alpha. With it, you can then date an unlimited stream of temporary girlfriends, and treat them fairly decently, as you fish around for a girl who you won’t need to constantly manipulate by being the asshole that nobody wants to look at in the mirror.

      I also suspect a lot of game attracts the wrong girls for an LTR. Idiot bimbos who examine mates poorly, and make bad social judgments. Use manufactured asshole game, instead of honestly won status combined with your personality, and you will end up with a constant stream of air-headed, insecure abuse sponges who need you to keep up your act.

      Again, people are different, and this may be what you are looking for. But know there are other men who won’t find happiness in that. To tell them that they should be happy, when you don’t understand their psychology, is to consign them to an unsatisfied life spent wondering, ‘what-if I had followed my heart.’

      And don’t get me wrong. I know that the majority of girls (and it is likely even be the vast majority) are either illogical and easily manipulated, or cold-hearted gold diggers (and most all don’t even know it). I accept game works, and it works very well on hotter women, who are prone to cuckold you.

      But there are a few girls out there who are different. They’re smarter, they’re less likely to make a mistake and bang the asshole mail-boy in their office on a whim, they’re more likely to be reliable under pressure, and they will do a better job making your kids successful and happy. And they will probably reject many, if not all aspects of asshole game.

      If your preference is an honest LTR, or you just don’t want to have to pretend to be somebody you don’t really like, do it the old fashioned way. Become really good at something people need, and then offer that to the marketplace, and reap your rewards. Merely by examining this site, processing the info, adding it to your arsenal of knowledge, and then saying this isn’t for you, you’re showing the world the real meaning of the word Alpha.

      Like Steve Jobs said, follow your own intuition. It really does know where your success lies..


  39. OT but worth a look:


    “Miami Teen Angie Varona Unwittingly Became Internet Pervs’ Favorite Jailbait Model at 14

    ​Angie Varona has likely never posed professionally (except maybeyearbook photos) yet she has unwittingly become one of the Internet’s favorite models. Problem is, Varona is only 17, and Internet pervs en masse have been trading candid photos of the Miami teen since she was 14. Varona claims her life has been ruined because of it. She has even received numerous threats, and her family had to contact the FBI.”


    Exhibit A in this poor angel’s ruination:



    • Oh, the poor dear… *fap fap fap fap fap*


    • Damn. Fourteen?

      Something’s gotta give. It is an abject, collective fantasy to pretend we can keep that level of chum out of the jaws of sharks with a few tsk-tsks and outmoded moralizing. The ancient mores that shamed predators and protected children have been stretched past the breaking point by expanding childhood to 18 (majority) or 21 (drink) or 27 (Obamacare) and beyond.

      Add to that the now-universal accessibility of images and information, stir in the preposterous slutwalk notion that women do not contribute to the responsibility for sexual mishaps, and there will be much greater horrors than having to home-school their little wanna-be pornstar. There already are horrors: Varona should ask her peers in Serbia or Thailand what’s the worst that could happen when you playfully commodify your high-demand flesh, rather than mobilize the entire culture to treat it as a pearl of great price.

      That young lady is in every physical sense a woman. That her mental and spiritual maturity has not developed along with her D-cups is a failure of parenting and society, not nature. You want to freeze grown men and women in mental adolescence as they frolic through their prime fertility years? There will be consequences.

      Her “life has been ruined,” they claim? She and her parents have an impoverished imagination with regard to how a girl like that might actually get “ruined.”


    • Yeah right, if I’m attracted to her at 17 and a half I’m a perv, if I’m attracted to her at 18 I’m ok? Pedobear lost interest when she hit puberty.


  40. on October 12, 2011 at 7:03 pm (r)Evoluzione

    Just by feel, I’m thinking the event some kind of politico event. Demopublican or Republicrat fundraiser, or something similar.

    The Alpha’s behavior is certainly unflappable. I see the attraction in that, and no question it’s a masterful vajay-tingler.

    For myself, the icy aloofness doesn’t fit my persona. I enjoy the aloof, yet witty, cocky/funny sort of caddishness myself. Raised by my dad, a natural alpha, he gives people shit constantly, and rarely gives a straight answer . This feels natural to me, though it didn’t always.

    I knew I’d hit my zone the other night when one of my main squeezes shit-tested me hard (a rare occurance these days), and my over-the-top alpha answer netted me several punches in the arm punctuating accusations of being a cad. This was shortlybefore she banged my brains out, during which told me overtly that my caddish joking makes her wet.


  41. ‘His facial expression remained unmoved. A powerful pause heightened the awkwardness before he answered. “Don’t worry about it. I got it.” He then nods in the direction of the others.’



  42. Here’s a question for H or anyone else willing to offer their thoughts:

    Assuming you have a girl in this situation – lovestruck with an Alpha – and then this girl discovers the blog finally understanding what she has allowed herself to become for years or so. This girl then realizes she needs nothing from him as he has needed her more all these years (financially, as exemplified in this post, and etc.) *She can get over the sex, and find it elsewhere*
    Well, what now H?
    Put yourself in the position of a guy who perhaps found someone he actually might have loved. Or grown ” extremely fond” of if the L word scares you. You lose a girl who was honest with you all this time and left because she was tired of being used. Is your response, judging by all the previous posts, seriously just going to be – some variation of “there are other fish in the sea”. Don’t get me wrong, your analysis is spot on – I love it. But at some point the games have to stop, no? You both have to mature out of this or otherwise fail to admit/come to terms with the fact that you both want each other and don’t want to deal with losing each other (even though you both could afford to, I’m not being direly and sickeningly romantic here). I honestly don’t know what kind of women we’re talking about here, but they resemble doormats more than anything else.

    [Heartiste: If you haven’t hurt over losing someone, you haven’t lived.]


    • Paging Gbfm here.
      Are the desouled bernankified asscocked women really worthy of love?


    • I’ve sadly never been impressed with the stuff women post in response to this blog. Nothing of even the slightest bit of wit or insight.


      • As opposed to, say, the guy below who added “Did someone encourage the faggots from HCWD to post here?”
        Regular Oscar Wilde, that guy.


      • heh, you’ll notice that the corollary of my statement is not that “everything men post is impressive.” 20% of the posts by men here are good, 0% of the posts by women here are good, IMHO.


      • Rarfy, enlighten me.
        What would you expect to hear from us women? The slightest remark of intelligence coming from a woman on this blog would result in male upheaval in attempt to reprimand even slightly threatened egos. Though many guys fall into the brighter category on this blog, the – idiots – for lack of better adjective, would not be able to handle a challenge. So yes, speaking for myself at least, responses are tailored to the audience of this blog. I don’t necessarily enjoy poking holes in people’s ideas and I don’t find it necessary to bring men down in order to feel better about myself. Especially when a lot of what is said on this blog is true… at least for the greater part of the female population.


      • What is said on this blog is true for *all* of the female population, there are *no* exceptions.

        The surest way a woman can utilize her own innate, god-given intelligence is by showing that she passes the SH*T test (Samson’s Hypergamy Test) (TM):
        Does she sleep with men she finds UNattractive?
        If she does, I welcome a sister to the realm of rationality. If she doesn’t then she’s a whore.


      • In this context, an exception would be just a freak — as much resentment as I have for female hypergamy at never being the recipient, I have only a psychologist’s scorn for the warped cunts who seek out ugly men. There’s something deeply seedy at work in it that makes me almost ill. With whores, at least they’re still all about proper display value; females who lack that sense are deracinated in a way I don’t even wish to explore, for they are removed from the mammalian order of things at a level not achieved even by the most devoted buggerers & feminists. There is ONE valid reason for lying down for an ugly/fat/old man and that is $$$. Anything else is psychopathy.


      • @uh:
        What I mean is this: Many women use attraction as the *only* factor to decide who they will sleep with (e.g. the college sluts that our host regularly writes about) – I call them whores, justifiably. They are utterly not using their reason to decide who to sleep with, they are just using their hindbrains.

        If a woman can use her reason in deciding a matter of the greatest emotional moment to her (who she will sleep with), then her power of thinking deserves the noble title of “human” (as opposed to “animal”). However, as we know, what women say does not count, what she does however tells all of the tale.

        That’s the rationale behind the SH*T test – Samson’s Hypergamy Test (TM).


      • What’s your reason for scorning warped cunts who seek out ugly men? Ugly men need someone to fuck too, and if they find women who would do it, then everyone is happy. Less rape, less violence, less celibacy-induced depression and suicide! That is another valid reason for lying down for an ugly/fat/old man, so I think your scorn is unnecessary. If that behavior makes you sick, just say that, but there is no logic behind it, is there? If there is, explain please.


      • Emma,

        Quoting myself:

        “Any exception here is a biological exception, i.e. a genetic freak, a bad mutation. Either the biological criteria are constant or they are not: if they are not, we arrive at distinct types of female, i.e. females evolved with entirely different mating strategies. This is impossible, humans being sexually dimorphic.”

        Thus females who prefer unfit types are deviant. Gross deviation from bio-norms is disgusting to me; to the extent it isn’t to others, to that extent has their sensibility been dulled by propaganda. I think of it as “hothouse behavior” — what results from cramped social conditions. Just like replicating genes going wrong ( = cancer), too many people running around with crazy ideas leads to all sorts of crazy social configurations that a few thousand bullets would correct in a weekend. Homosex e.g. can serve a valid function if it’s in response to strict social conditions, as in prison or in some Islamic nations (Afghanistan). It is always pure deviance, but over here it is the deviance of luxuriant vice, not a way to work off pent up sexual energy.

        Less rape, less violence, less celibacy-induced depression and suicide!

        This is myth-making. Violence comes from blacks, immigrants, and drug users.

        If that behavior makes you sick, just say that, but there is no logic behind it, is there?

        Of course there is always a logic behind every neocortical projection. Question is to what degree is tallies with objective reality. My values are evolutionary values: what is good for a population is that which will promote its coherence and perpetuity. Liberal values are anti-values: that which promotes incoherence and genetic dead-ends. Homosexuality, feminism, miscegeny, and whatever word best signifies preference for unfit lovers, are all genetic dead-ends, signals of degeneracy, thwarted instincts.

        Good — that which promotes and improves life. Bad — that which aborts or degrades it.


      • Ah, ok, I can see what you mean about reproducing with men with bad genes. I should make a distinction between reproducing with men with bad genes and those are in today’s climate undesirable (who might not have bad genes). I think Samson might be right – if women continue prefering the same men they did thousands of years ago, civilization might break. And it’s not like alphas have better genes, they might have tons of issues, but it doesn’t turn women away. A woman naturally prefering betas will be a mutant, but that would be evolution and not really a bad thing.
        And violence can come from many places. Sure, it comes from immigrants as well.


      • What is said on this blog is true for *all* of the female population, there are *no* exceptions.

        I hope that’s sarcasm. No halfway intelligent person could believe that there are universal social trends to which there are no exceptions.

        Does she sleep with men she finds UNattractive?
        No one (man or woman) sleeps with people they find unattractive. But there are some women who are attracted intelligence, kindness or empathy rather than cockiness, wealth, or physique.


      • No halfway intelligent person could believe that there are universal social trends to which there are no exceptions.

        Right. But mate selection isn’t a social trend, though it can be skewed by propaganda. Fitness indicators are constant across the animal kingdom. This is biology, not sociology.

        If it were not so, women would select literally any male body put in their way — fat, pockmarked, crippled, drunken, gutter-bound, anything would satisfy.

        Fitness is the rule. Markers are the proofs. Markers can be honest, dishonest, or (winging it here) false — the last the skewing by propaganda, such as the growing preference for negroes, absolutely the most unfit for any activities beyond fucking, abuse, contracting disease or the very seed of Cain, and possibly being murdered. All the girls, who are of course taught that negroes are just like us blahblahblah, see is total asshole disdain for all social conventions, which sparks the nethermost tingle in this age that has been misled to believe that “children must rebel, it’s part of growing up” (hello, Jew psychologists).

        Any exception here is a biological exception, i.e. a genetic freak, a bad mutation. Either the biological criteria are constant or they are not: if they are not, we arrive at distinct types of female, i.e. females evolved with entirely different mating strategies. This is impossible, humans being sexually dimorphic.

        At most you have females of such trifling libido that they’re like retiring, homebody Emily Dickinson types who wince when being fucked and so on. And invariably, even if they’re not ugly, they are far from optimal and have passed through life steeped in this inhibiting awareness of their own biological inferiority.

        Life belongs to the beautiful, the strong, the rich, the superior — in any capacity. No one wants to believe at first that all women conform to selective constants. Just like no one wants to believe at first that Jews are very wealthy and determined social saboteurs, maybe because they knew a broke Jew at college who was just the sweetest guy in the world.

        Every group has its strategy. There is no circumventing it. Exceptions here are unfavorable mutations, and not to be counted against the majority. This is the beautiful parable of Jesus’ crucifixion, in fact — for only a group with the tightest game treats renegades so viciously, so profoundly …


      • Rarfy wrote: I’ve sadly never been impressed with the stuff women post in response to this blog. Nothing of even the slightest bit of wit or insight.

        Ha. The women have become the best reason to come back to this blog. They break up the repetitive monotony of rudimentary game concepts that were better explained in the archive. And the men who post tend to be weak mimics of their master. It becomes one almighty Dutch oven of farts in here, farts that all smell the same.

        Then along comes girls to liberate our olfactory sense (long since desensitized to the funk) with their perfume and bath oils and sugar and spice and everything nice.

        The women with the temerity to post consistently in these precincts have pre-selected themselves. Like Annette, they post with a degree of humility born of chastisement. That is fantastically feminine behavior.

        Obviously just speaking for myself, I don’t dig on sausage parties, even in places like these. If the women have not made a nuisance of themselves — as they are conditioned by our lamentable culture to do — they are wonderful decoration, like Playboy bunnies at men’s clubs. We aren’t training Marines to kill here, nor are we focused on harnessing fusion. Distaff distractions are not fatal to our project.

        Now dance, monkeys: accuse me of awkward beta-flattery in the attempt to game a faceless girl online. Then accuse me of collaborating with the enemy for noting my appreciation of the feminine. Such is how all-male coteries begin to queer themselves.

        Fourth-rate acolytes tend to overinterpret the mandate, like Barfy above. A hazard of the dynamic.


    • doormats? no…..tiles.

      a while back someone else wrote ‘women are like tiles. when you lay them down right the first time, you can walk all over them forever.’


    • Annette: I post here under my real name. Google searches usually have at least one of my comments here on the first results page, and more as one digs deeper.

      I also know that more than a handful of women I’ve dated in the past year or so have read my responses, and even dug into the site on its own.

      Guess what the response from them is, 90% of the time? “It’s so hot how much sense you made, I’m glad you don’t play those games with me. <3"

      Oh, but I do. And it's not a game — it's the sweetest thing a man can do for his woman; she lives in a world where women are forced to lead, make decisions, expend energy and money like a man does. When those top ranking women meet a man who leads them fearlessly, their hearts explode with love — even if they don't see that what they want most is to not make decisions, stress or lead.


    • on October 13, 2011 at 1:08 am (r)Evoluzione

      Truth: the pain of loss is the best learning experience that you’ll never, ever want to have again.
      I would venture a guess that over half, and perhaps 90%, of men reading this blog came to learn game after getting one’s heart ripped out after catching feelings for someone, and badly. There is a game principle named to describe this phenomenon: one-itis: inflammation due to excessive attatchment to ideas that one person is “the one.” Having been there a time or two, it’s a pain you never, ever want again. It hurts so much, IMO, because it’s an unnatural fixation on one individual. It’s also a sign of emotional immaturity and low self-image.

      Looking back, I can see one-itis is a form of co-dependency, and thus the resulting pain is just that of the DT’s of getting off heroin or alcohol. One-itis is the puppy-crush, and as adults we best be able to move past it.

      The lesson of one-itis is rarely a single course, but a curriculum which includes lessons in female hypergamy and rotating polyandry. Studying principles of applied evolutionary psychology, a.k.a. learning to have charisma, a.k.a game, is a big part of the healing process. I once thought I would never heal. Now I know that scar tissue makes me who I am, and makes me immeasurably stronger, more self-reliant and self-contained, emotionally speaking. Not to mention able to relate to people much more effectively, and to get my sexual needs met as a delicious and decadently rich icing on the cake. Being better at relationships, and less attached to their ebbs and flows, to be rock-steady in the face of shit-test storms, is the cherry on top.


    • Annette,

      “Don’t get me wrong, your analysis is spot on – I love it. But at some point the games have to stop, no?”

      No. The game will never stop. Because women will always exhibit behavior where an alpha or “game” response is required to keep the relationship in control by the man. Whether its a one night pickup, an LTR, a marriage, a fuck buddy or whatever.

      Can an alpha man “love” or be “extremely fond” of a woman and not ‘want’ to risk losing her? Sure. Irrelevant.

      The tough truth Anette is that for men who have experienced being with many hot women, SMV 8 or above, you realize what they are capable of, and what they do act upon- whether in a “committed” relationship or not.

      Were not talking about doormats, were talking about physically attractive women who have a daily endless supply of suitors approaching them, and txting them, calling them, etc.

      Quick story: was together with a gorgeous 8.5, maybe a 9, Our relationship was awesome. Super fun. She was always with me. One night she passed out and her phone buzzed. I picked it up, and went through it. I opened pandora’s box into the life of the hot chic and the ugly truth that although I could pull hot women, I was clearly not in control of the relationship- and had lots of work to do to save myself from emotional pain.

      As my journey continued I’ve only seen this confirmed over, and over again. Even by women that are 7s, and sometimes 6s. I have lady friends that keep a universe of orbiters and they tell me about these guys. And this also is how I’ve confirmed the above. Hot young women who are 20yrs old to even 30yrs old that jerk men around, even their BFs, fiances, etc and make up stories to tell them so they can hang out with guys like me. Why? Because I’m a dick, mostly. I’m the guy that will tell them their tatoo is ugly, their makeup makes them look like a clown, they need to get to the gym, their roots are showing and they look tore up, will ignore them when they txt, will ditch them at a venue for a short while, will txt/call other chics in front of them, and on and on…

      …I “game” them, and they love me for it.

      To add, I’m not an asshole all of the time. Just enough assholery needed to cross the sexual line as fast as possible.


      • this is awesome.

        “I was clearly not in control of the relationship- and had lots of work to do to save myself from emotional pain.

        As my journey continued I’ve only seen this confirmed over, and over again. Even by women that are 7s, and sometimes 6s.

        [wonder why that is? do tell us more!]

        Because I’m a dick, mostly. I’m the guy that will tell them their tatoo is ugly, their makeup makes them look like a clown, they need to get to the gym, their roots are showing and they look tore up, will ignore them when they txt, will ditch them at a venue for a short while, will txt/call other chics in front of them, and on and on…”


    • Testify, sister. Annette gropes her way into uncovering one limit of game as presently constituted.

      Disseminating an ideology requires the reduction of people to abstractions. Ideologues of game fashioned a caricature in reply to the criticism of this abstracting tendency (with its own acronym, of course): NAWALT.

      It’s doubtful that any PUA simply regards the people in his life (and tangential to his life) as mere abstractions, but employing typology is a useful tool when promoting the rudiments to be conveyed. Annette is right to call out the half-formed declarations of fans in the comment threads who universalize every observation received from on high as an immutable law. Whenever you hear the term “no exceptions” down here in the mosh pit you are safe to assume it is the product of enthusiasm more than proper discernment.

      Women are not “doormats” per se. But they have a tendency toward doormatism. That’s the principle being isolated and elucidated.

      When new dogma is promulgated in the place of the old lies, it is important not to allow exceptions-to-the-rule or criticism that might throw a newbie off the righteous path. If you haven’t been a fan for a long time it’s hard to notice the flat trajectory of the ideology until you encounter the repetition. But look at the very first comment in this thread, from Philip. Eventually an observant student begins to notice the seams. This isn’t an indictment of the ideology so much as it is an indication that it’s time for the advanced class.

      Annette’s question is from the advanced class. She won’t find an answer here because the subtleties of strategy & tactics are not the purpose of Boot Camp. The purpose here is to strip men down to their essence and make them ready to learn. The creative destruction of game focuses on the destruction more than the creativity.


    • Annette wrote: “Don’t get me wrong, your analysis is spot on – I love it. But at some point the games have to stop, no?”

      Yes. The games eventually stop. What happens after recess is indeed the important matter. But the playing is not frivolous, either. It conditions a man to fashion a post-game life worth putting the games behind for.

      If this is not fathomable to a guy in the thick of it (the vast constituency of this blog, of course), he is trapped in a feedback loop of fantasy. He’s doing it wrong. Some even extrapolate the cock carousel into politics and science, as if the wild-oats period of adolescence is the tyrannical fact upon which the rest of human life is dependent.

      Much of the short-sightedness of the game community probably owes to the delusions of immortality that attend youth. Like wrinkling spinsters who insist they “still got it!” there is some denial of the inexorable progression of life, as if the fairytale just reverts back to chapter one rather than ever reaching an end.

      Did ye not hear it? — No; ’twas but the wind,
      Or the car rattling o’er the stony street;
      On with the dance! let joy be unconfined;
      No sleep till morn, when youth and pleasure meet
      To chase the glowing hours with flying feet.

      Look, the need to progress past the basics is not brought on by simple disillusionment. This is a critical misunderstanding. Men never get tired of pussy. We would play Game (or video games) for the rest of our lives something greater never called upon us. What breaks us out of the one stage is not something negative, like boredom, but rather something positive, like the will to apply such effective wisdom to the greatest possible endeavors.

      Advanced class is about how to discover which of our finite choices is worthy of applying such a devastating tool to. What else can the sharp cold steel knife of game slice wide open?

      Turns out: lots of things.

      But hark! — that heavy sound breaks in once more,
      As if the clouds its echo would repeat;
      And nearer, clearer, deadlier than before;
      Arm! arm! it is — it is — the cannon’s opening roar!


      • Folks, King hAte is back! And he’s bringing us another serving of useless rhetorical vernacular to make a point that could otherwise be done in a couple of sentances.

        King A enough of us have read your bombastic postings and we get that you believe there is a ‘greater meaning’ (however you want to phrase it) that us students of game haven’t realized yet. Fine. Accepted. Maybe you are right.

        Now, show us.

        Since you have mastered game, and have gone through the luxury of having an endless supply of beautiful women waiting to serve your sexual needs, then for once, come down to our level and share your knowledge with us. Provide some examples.

        Or let’s look at this another way: an opportunity for you to validate your purpose here on this blog. Like the old wise man kicking down knowledge to the youth by telling them to save money for a rainy day, or whatever.


      • You’re a stupid, broken record, Ripp, barely worth the reply.

        Except to say I don’t engage blowhard challenges from chumps with one broken shovel-handle in his rhetorical tool shed.


  43. Did someone encourage the faggots from HCWD to post here?


  44. on October 12, 2011 at 7:39 pm the_alpha_male

    Nothing to do with this post but an alpha of alpha:

    They sure don’t make front-men like they used to.


  45. Alpha body language… for dummies:


  46. Yet another head-shot to the idea of “Be a Good Provider”.
    Because their sexual hindbrain does not take notice of them needing a provider. Because their sexual hindbrain has the same wiring as their co-mamallian fore-sisters. Like shrews, mice, or antelope. It tingles for what what you display, not for how you treat them…


  47. as far as the ‘event” in question,i wonder if it was a creative type gathering,maybe advertising awards or something of that nature. If the alpha is a “creative” it would put a different spin on his behavior,with his clothes and unsocial attitude being much more acceptable. As opposed to being an IT goof,whose douchebag behavior to gorgeous young women doesnt often result in a hot vag-peircing session.


  48. To the amateur shrinks out there: it’s not just Daddy issues. A majority of women are drawn to jerks. Not all, of course, but most. It’s part of their deepest biological programming.

    Of course, there are exceptions. But learning the mannerisms of a jerk is the smart first step


  49. Great post, storytelling and insights, but the only reaction I feel is cynicism.

    Better to bask in the real than to delude oneself with untruths, yeah?


  50. Of course I agree that chicks dig this type of asshole, but personally I’d get no joy out of it. One can also go the dandy with an edge route and charm the pants off a woman. Like a Russell Brand, although there are only 0.00001% of men who can pull it off like he can. Here he is charming and dominating a female interviewer, pretty funny:

    Watch their second meet-up as well, he’s even more seductive and funny.


  51. I’d like to hear an example of the thurst and parry exchange between alphaboyfriend and hotbestfriend. Can you give a hypothetical without giving away too much info about the guy? Were the insults about his lack of a job? And how’d he respond? It’d be interesting to hear.


  52. Hmmmm. So all the scathing resentment I elicit because of my natural aloofness, from women I’m not banging, is not really hate then….

    I know I am naturally aloof and it works well for me with certain women but not all, but I most certainly have felt this kind of scorn from women in the past and could never quite wrap my head around it….never really thought of it often either, tbh.

    I mean, physically I’m a somewhat alpha, Clint Eastwood type, but sadly I went through much of my life as a semi-beta….

    Time for a little introspection here, very good article Roissy


  53. And him? Decent looking. Easy on the eyes, I suppose most women would say. Certainly not Hollywood looks. Not a big or muscular guy. Lean to the point of skinny.

    OK Heartiste – let’s cut to the chase: How tall was the guy???


  54. Actually, I’ve often noticed that I get this type of resentment from lesbians whom I’m not being deferential or pedestalizing to as well, bigtime. I wonder what the psychology behind that is…..I mean, often they have a hate on for men quite naturally, but I seem to elicit outright hate from them…


  55. He was short. Yes, he might have been a half inch shorter than his gf. Unemployed.

    Oops, missed that part…

    *I still don’t fully believe this story though Heartiste – since height is a major factor for nearly all women … be they sluts, ‘nice’ girls … or otherwise. (Not to say that women will stay loyal to a tall beta – of which there are millions – whom women have greater contempt and sometimes even a hateful disrespect, for than average-to-shorter heighted men.


    • She may be wearing heels.


    • Oh come on, that’s total bullshit. I’m a shorter man and I’ve had little issue spending considerable social time with taller gals. Hell, I dated a dame who was 2.5″ taller than me (6.5″ in heels) for over a year and there was never an issue.

      When it comes to sex, all that matters is your shoulder-to-groin height. As long as the man’s torso is bigger than the woman’s, sex is no problem. Doggie-style might be difficult if she has taller thighs, but who cares.

      If a woman thinks she wants a taller man, she’s generally wrong. Yes, there’s some correlation between height and natural alphaism, but that’s what the woman wants: a confident man who gets his way. Sure, taller guys have it “easier” in that department, in general, but shorter guys can get just as much tail if they’re confident and assured.


    • height and looks make the introductions easier, for sure. but once you start talking, game trumps all.

      for EG. had a buddy who was abercrombie model good looking. that all american aryan type. tall and well built. girls were just awestruck by him. so i introduce him to one of my prettier friends, and he is shy, so he sort of awkwardly stands there post intro, and i see the attraction that had built for months prior evaporate in about 20 seconds. never to return.

      [Heartiste: All else equal, it is certainly better to be good-looking than ugly. This blog has never denied that fact of life. What this blog has stressed, though, is that way too many men, for reasons having to do with their projection of what they find attractive in women, put too much faith in and emphasis upon male good looks, when the reality is that good looks on men are less important for attracting women than they realize, and can even be a detriment in some cases when women expect alpha behavior from the good-looking man and he doesn’t deliver.]


      • on October 13, 2011 at 2:11 pm 1st time caller

        I feel like this is my problem. I’d say I’m more attractive and physically fit than a lot of men out there but I’m so shy and “nice” that my looks aren’t congruent with my behavior. I’m still giving it my best to internalize the attitude and teachings of this blog.


    • while it’s true that women consider height to be an important factor, what this means is that the guy needs to up his game to make up for it.

      no, not every guy can manage this, and shorter guy/taller girl pairings are not the majority, but to not believe the story simply because the guy is shorter than the girl (and only by half an inch) is a bit….naive.

      a buddy of mine is not only not tall, but asian. ostensibly two huge red flags which should drive his smv into the negative numbers, yet he regularly bangs hot women who are taller than him. how does he do this? it’s because he oozes attitude and charisma. his alphaness is more than enough to overpower his shortcomings.

      [Heartiste: Even though he was a bit shorter than her, the perception generated by his strong posture and alpha demeanor made it seem that he was taller than her. And the girlfriend was all-too-willing to help sustain this illusion by scrunching herself downward and nuzzling into his chest so that he would stand taller than her.
      I think some of you guys really need to come to grips with the blatant reality that for men, attitude trumps almost everything.]


    • Y’all need to relax. I’m 6’0, tallish but not really tall. And i gotta admit that during my beta days, I already felt shorter than some really short fucks with charisma.
      Now with alpha BL and stuff, I try to stand tall and i don’t really allow myself to be impressed by other guys. But if i felt shorter than a 5’5 dude as a beta, i’m sure a woman (any woman) would feel like a baby girl in front of a shortie with a tight game.


  56. There have been some awesome posts on this site lately.

    This one was ok too. It really drew me in, and was a bit mysterious too! Some things had to be redacted. Great narrative, saar!


  57. had you chosen to, how would you have gone about AMOGing him?


  58. A post perfectly suited for another edition of Alpha Music Lyrics:

    Theory of a Deadman ~ Gentleman

    I let the door hit you right in the face
    And when the check comes, I’ll make you pay
    Don’t have a car, guess you’re picking me up
    And in the back seat we’ll be falling in love
    My only job is to lie on this couch
    And while you’re workin’ I’ll be hangin’ out
    Now don’t get mad cause you knew from the start
    I was an asshole who would never go far

    Cause when you’re really good to girls,
    Give them your entire world,
    They end up walking away.
    (Hey, Hey)
    They don’t want a standard guy, rather have you cheat and lie,
    And do something they hate

    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They say they do but in the end
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They want a loser like me
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    If you want to get to them
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They want a loser like me

    Your parents cry when you bring me around
    They raised you up just so I can take you down
    There goes your life right before their eyes
    I’ll have you bare foot pregnant, going outta your mind

    Cause when you’re really good to girls
    Give them your entire world
    They end up walking away
    (Hey, Hey)
    They don’t want a standard guy, rather have you cheat and lie
    And do something they hate

    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They say they do but in the end
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They want a loser like me
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    If you want to get to them
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They want a loser like me

    I used to be a nice guy
    But that don’t get you anywhere
    So now I’m just a piece of shit, idiot
    Who’s too stupid to care

    When you give a girl respect
    Treat her like she is the best
    You’re nothing to her
    She’d rather have you playing games
    Piss her off and make her wait
    If you want it to work

    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They say they do but in the end
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They want a loser like me
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    If you want to get to them
    Girls don’t want a gentleman
    They want a loser like me


  59. @ Rollo Tomassi

    Corey Worthington an alpha? Um, just um goes to show um how much the um western world has um degenerated.

    When the interviewer told him to take off his glasses the first response that came to my mind was “only if you take off your top”. So much for thinking on his feet.

    And we’re venerating these losers as alphas? God help us.

    Here’s a tip. The reason that women choose these drongos is principally that they come across as “tough” without being threatening. A woman’s ideal is a handsome, charismatic dude with a lot of money, but they don’t have the maturity or self-confidence to feel worthy of him (believe it or not, but a man’s attractiveness works against him – he needs to defuse the angst either with appropriate banter, or just by being an idiot). And so women spook. They finish up fleeing for the hills, settling for those lame degenerates that pretend tough without being strong. They finish up settling for those morons that they don’t find threatening in either a moral or intellectual sense. This idea that women feel “threatened”, that they are standing on existential quicksand, is what men have to work against, even as they have everything that a woman can desire… or maybe more so because of it.


    • Nobull,

      That was brilliant. I have long suspected this myself, but I could never have articulated it as well as you have. I’m a firm believer in Game; I believe in the truthfulness and usefulness of great big heaping shovel-fulls of the stuff. But I also think Gamsters have some significant blind-spots that need correction and filling-in. I hope to read more commentary from you in the future.


    • “The reason that women choose these drongos is principally that they come across as “tough” without being threatening.”

      This. Women choose these “drongos”. Game is about getting laid and whatever works for getting laid works for us. We are not interested at all in what women’s ideals are, you know. Why should we be striving to be the “handsome, charismatic dude with a lot of money”? That’s too much work.


  60. Great post. I always appreciate the surgical writings of Roissy. He writes in 1080p.

    So I’m a west coast guy, but currently out here on the east coast for some family shit. I need to throw down a few quick stories of success.

    Was in Boston at a bar. A hot blonde, smv 8, was sitting solo scribbling away. Turns out she was writing a grant request for her Phd (lots of colleges in boston.) Long story short I’ll bulletize my tactics:
    -never smiled at her, only smirked
    -continually fleeting eyes
    -never responded with positive “oh that’s cool” shit to her ramblings of academic success
    -called her a dork, several times
    -called out her fake colored eye contacts
    -ran the healthy gambit (low BMI, waist-hip ratio), this always works I’m telling you
    -***called her a “netflix kind of girl”, she laughed, had no idea why she was, perfect
    -another dude entered set, she broke convo with me, I. Interupted her, reframed convo and befriended guy, dominated conversation, ignored her until he left
    -walked her to car
    -heavy makeout,pulling hair, pinned her against car, hand up he skirt, spreading ass apart, rubbin the kitty from the front, lasted around ~15m. Hot.
    -thin athletic, in heels,
    -total seduction ~3 hours from cold approach.

    No alcohol. She didn’t drink, and I wasn’t either.

    Didn’t fuck close that night, but the buildup was fucking exciting. Anyways crdit to CH for some of the tactics.


    • Nice job. How many times did you catch yourself leaning in towards her and wanted to slap yourself in the face?

      The fuck close isn’t always what we want anyway — once you know the power of treating a woman the way her inner brain wants you to, the sex part becomes a non-issue: if you want it, it’s there, so you don’t waste your time/energy banging every gal who asks you to.


    • Tight. Excellent game, and nice concise report.


    • Thanks guys.

      @AB: I’m very aware of the “pecking” or leaning in beta behavior. I first saw this outlined in a mystery video years ago. I’m very conscience of it and almost never do it. I stay leaned back, one shoulder dropped, glass by my side. It’s hilarious to watch beta guys peck like fucking pigeons when talking to a chic. That and they’re agreeable nods and shit eating smile.

      Here is a funny part I forgot to add: so ms. Phd is a diet coke fiend. As I tucked her into her honda accord (with black leathr seats, heh) her car was filled with empty diet coke cans. Her car door had 4 of them stuffed in the side pocket. After sucking face whilst she was sitting down in the driver seat I playfully push her off gently “get off me” (a great maneuver during heavy makeout, role-reversal) then look at the cans and say, “you and your fucking diet coke” grab a can, crunch it in my hand ljike a meathead and throw it on the parking lot ground. She’s appalled. But turned on. “Get outa here” I close her door and roll off.

      Now I’ll share my killer end of night txt that I always use (must be a high compliance target, like phd girl). Once the chic has gotten home wait about 15 to 30m or however long needed and txt: “stop thinking about me and get some rest”

      Ms phd girl responded right away. I have very good success with this, id say 90%. But here is the next most important part: after she responds, DO NOT REPLY back, no matter what. Start new thread the next day.


  61. I’m glad to read this description, because I feel I’ve somewhat somehow achieved some of it. But I don’t particularly relish in being a cocky asshole.


  62. Rihanna has revealed that she no longer dislikes her ex-boyfriend Chris Brown.

    The pair’s relationship imploded after Brown assaulted her in a car after a pre-Grammy party in Los Angeles in 2008.

    But the Umbrella star has told Esquire magazine in their latest issue that she has had to move on from the incident because it “was taking up too much of my time” and she is even enjoying his music again.

    “Obviously, I had some resentment toward him for a while, for obvious reasons,” she said candidly. “But I’ve put that behind me.”

    “It was too much anger. I’m really excited to see the breakthrough he’s had in his career.

    “It’s incredible to see how he pulled it out the way he did. Even when the world seemed like it was against him, you know? I really like the music he’s putting out. I’m a fan of his stuff. I’ve always been a fan.”

    The 23-year-old Barbadian singer added that she never had any ill will towards her ex despite what he did to her.

    “I would never wish anything horrible for him,” she explained. “Never. I never have.”

    Brown is currently serving a five-year probation term and has completed his court-ordered community labour and anger management classes.

    Rihanna’s new album titled, Talk Talk Talk, will be released on November 21 and will be her sixth studio record.

    Brown’s album Grafitti, which was released 10 months after the assault, did not do well, but his recent album F.A.M.E. (Forgiving All My Enemies) debuted at number one on the Billboard 200 albums chart back in March.


  63. Go write a romance novel


  64. AskMen.com is responding to cat lady Bolick’s article:



  65. on October 13, 2011 at 9:45 am Proud-to-be-an-Omega-Male

    I wish I could be alpha, but I’m omega. No amount of game could ever save me. I’m a born omega. Even if I had tight game and a fist full of fifties, I prolly still couldn’t get it on. I’m the biggest omega there ever was, if there was an award for omegatude, then I deserve it more than anyone. O please help me.


  66. on October 13, 2011 at 9:49 am Proud-to-be-an-Omega-Male

    I’m surprised Roissy’s never mentioned Schopenhauer’s On Women, a great essay on female psychology, if ever there was one. A quote: Men are by nature merely indifferent to one another; but women are by nature enemies.


    • Schopenhauer may have astute observations about women, but that quote on men lacks any sort of understanding of the ethics of men.

      We built civilization, and that means teamwork, bonding, and bros before hoes. Male friendships can be meaningful, especially when intense experience, like war, is the glue that forms those bonds.


      • on October 13, 2011 at 3:51 pm The Chrome Microphone

        I think he meant by default

        You look across the room at an cool guy, you probably feel nothing

        Girl looks across the room at a pretty girl: “That bitch!”


    • Men and women both bond during stressful events. Men will get flooded with oxytocin, the same chemical that helps mothers bond with their babies, when in war or competition together. If you’ve gone through basic and tech school with guys in the military you’ll often find that friendship is different than the ones you’ve had before. Add combat to the mix and the bond goes deeper, which is why there are stories of bravery and selflessness.

      The male nature is to dive on a grenade to save those he values, man women or child. The unfortunate part is that at least for some men we are taught that we are disposable and that all women and children are deserving of our protection.

      Not so in the old days, and look to religions to point that out for us. Those that competed with a sect were labeled heathens and infidels, deserving only death. Women were mate guarded but not revered and seen as treacherous. Children of the competition were only salvageable as base laborers, otherwise death was the logical course of action.

      It’s callous and ugly, but the liberation of the Islamic countries went in the face of the philosophies espoused by the old testament and the koran. We unfortunately follow the hippy Jesus route in the US so instead of letting the infidels die we liberate them and their oil these days, with the right cheering and the left holding out the change cup for social “saftey-nets”.

      All this while the meme that men are “indifferent” or “simple” is spread and we are neutered with PC ostracization for going off the feminist script. By our nature we are truth seekers and protectors. Roles which women now look for government to fill.

      Rant done now.


      • No, do go on.

        But next time do also bear in mind that the men of those Islamic countries still practice heavy mate-guarding, and have nothing but a lash for those that espouse false doctrine.

        Don’t you know that is really why they were invaded? remember the beheading of the woman at Kabul stadium always being played to show the world how terrible the Taliban were?

        For controlling their women. Rigorously. Completely. Without apology.

        Why do you think annual policy reviews obsess over how many girls’ schools were built this year?

        The opposite of the hippie Jesus way would not be murdering their nation’s children; the opposite would be learning from the men — and leaving them alone.


    • Schopey deserves a lot of respect. Besides his brilliant mind, he was also quite the player. Pick up a bio, he fucked a lot of women. Another great quote: “marrying means to halve one’s rights and double one’s duties.” Repeat that as a mantra daily.

      Out of interest, which philosophers do the users here admire? Nietzsche has some insightful views on women – “you are going to women? Do not forget the whip!” – in spite of having little direct experience.


  67. Loved this post. One part stood out….

    “”Behind his back, they were disparaging, complaining bitterly of the way he treats his girlfriend (bitterness was correlated with their closeness to her), and constantly — I mean CONSTANTLY — working to install his ouster. I saw one girl drag her away so that she could introduce her to a man who, unknown to her at the time, was a handsome gay man.””

    The friends of the girl I’m dating…and other girls in my social circle have this same reaction to my presence.

    What is behind this? Why are chicks reacting so strongly to this guy and to me sometimes.

    Girls who don’t know me often say “you seem to give off an arrogance” one guy described my entry into a room as a “swagger”.

    Until I learned game I found this quite jarring….but now I think of these as compliments.


  68. […] Wrapped Around His Finger (heartiste.wordpress.com) […]


  69. From what I gathered, sure, the Ivy hottie is madly in love with the jerk, but the jerk is running into problems. Her female friends (her main support group) mostly hate him and actively undermine him. Eventually these opinions will get to her more and more; most women want social status above all else and will choose that over a jerk. You want your gf’s friends to approve of you; it’s better in the long run.

    In addition, her male friends and her friends’ boyfriends will most likely undermine him too.

    So while it’s good for him now, it probably won’t end so well. Most of the guys I know who have cute girlfriends, while not beta doormats, do NOT act like this guy in the story and have respect of other men and women.

    [Heartiste: They have been seeing each other for almost a decade. I believe they met late in high school or early in college, which might explain some of her devoted attachment to him. Women (and men to a lesser extent) pair bond much more strongly to first loves, because our sex and love memories are 1. first forged with them and 2. recall a time when our partner was at her physical peak.
    For those who wondered, I doubt he was *as much* of an asshole on the first date. Even assholes know better to work a little charm in when she isn’t yet totally addicted. But the basic premise remains unchallenged: this chick fell for a jerk, and stuck with a jerk, despite years and years of hearing disapproval from friends and family alike.]


    • women generally don’t care so much about what others think. they care mostly about what they feel. that said, while assholery will be off-putting to others (mainly beta types), alphas (both male and female) are savvy to the game and hence a subconscious rapport tends to be built (you see this w roissy’s respect for the man). i addressed this point earlier in response to an A.B. Dada post. true, if you are a total social outcast, it will probably work against you in the long term. but this guy is clearly not such a type; even if he was, the clucking from a few ruffled hens is not exactly the type of wake up call that will shake a woman in love.


  70. This is all good and makes sense, but I’m still curious as to what an “Austin Powers alpha” (as a previous post labeled) would look. For some of us, it’s simply not in our nature to be a hard, stoic jerk.


    • Did you watch the russell brand video in this thread?

      Personally I didn’t find him or the DLR video to be very funny, but they didn’t act like jerks at all, they were the entertainer, life-of-the-party alpha types.

      Again… not really impressed, but maybe some things could be gleaned from them


      • Watch and be impressed. He is jittery, though it is very hard to fault his game. He has clearly studied game alongside gaining his success. This makes him the most potent of seducers.


  71. on October 13, 2011 at 1:55 pm nocashandlowerrbeta

    Sounds like he didn’t really want to be at that social occasion but went anyway and he also had a Napoleon complex. A real player I knew in the 90s was a short guy with a Napoleon complex and often got into fights. He dated new hotties almost weekly for a decade plus and they were taller than him a lot of times but when he got married to a average 6 who was shorter in his early 40’s he had mellowed out much more.


    • What struck me hile reading this was the Wilde quote – ‘men marry because they are tired’. This is a lesson to us all. Let the fight within you go and you’ll end up with an average, over the hill broad who has been riding the cock carousel for twenty-odd years!


  72. I’ve been exploring the concept of relationships and what works and doesn’t for a couple of years, our esteemed host giving me a jumpstart with an audience for my self-discovery. Recently I wrote about my desire to be man’s best friend for my man – (no, not a bitch). The chick sounds like a puppy with her Master and reinforces my ideas. She’s adoring, wants to be good and is happy to be with him. He gives her something or she wouldn’t be with him. He more than tolerates her, he finds comfort in her presence, just like most men appreciate a well behaved pet. He’s trained her well and given her enough reward that she’s continued to be a good ‘pet’ well into their relationship. It’s working for both. Yes he may have cheated because most men are programmed for variety, but he’s not really going anywhere.

    My friends have often been surprised with who I’ve chosen to shower with my affection/love and think I’m overly generous with them. I’m not a fool, but there is a certain type (described somewhat above) who I’m likely to fall head over for. This post nails the truth.


    • sweetness, we KNOW you pedestalize hunky a-holes and we luv you for it


    • aoefe, what works for women in a relationship is beauty, youth, and a low-maintenance attitude. probably in that order. and that’s about 95% of the equation (assuming you want an alpha; betas are obviously more willing to compromise).

      my brief skim of your blog (which i like but would like more if it were less soap-opera-y) suggests that you get attached, then cling to and stifle guys who tend to be strongly independent free spirits.

      assuming good genes and an active biological clock, there’s nothing worse that you can do to an alpha male than stifle him with neediness and emotional drama. other than that you seem like quite the catch. good luck w everything.


      • 100%.

        Many women don’t understand that. Stifling a guy is pointless and counterproductive. He’s gonna keep doing what he’s doing (if he’s philandering or something), and he’s gonna contemplate a breakup.

        A woman has to avoid the traps of neediness, and superindependent trifling game-playing attitude.

        The only woman that i ever loved had this grace. I could travel around the world, get back to her, and find that nothing had changed. Still loving, still caring, few shit tests, low to medium maintenance.

        I’m not the alphaest alpha (but i’m probably your type, babe, yeahh…), but i’m afraid that’s the price to pay if you want a true alpha to stick around.


      • “(but i’m probably your type, babe, yeahh…)”

        Student, you perv, that was not directed at you.


  73. Sure, the guy sounds like an alpha and he’s got a hot bitch in tow, but he also sounds like a boring asshole. It’s fair to point out that guys can and do work this kind of game, but nobody should be aspiring to be that guy. You can be alpha and have the girl without constantly being an asshole.


  74. The biggest lesson for men to learn to have success with women is to understand them. The article below is another portal to understanding. I won’t critique it, but, boy, it is full of insights into the mind of the “educated modern” woman of today.


    Just one comment: The author talks about the lack of successful, well paid men who might be available for marriage compared to all the better paid women. When the govt begins to seriously contract, as contract it must, and they start dumping worthless office workers and other time servers, we’ll see about that.


  75. I don’t think so…game is additive…


  76. Stellar prose.


  77. Really? didnt read the comments. If my daughter brought home a little douchebag. Her older brothers would fuck with him so much he would be happy to have not simply vanished. Of course my two oldest are naturals. Both very large and known for intensity on the football field. Also have a friend of a friend of a friend. Scary thing is they are both extremely smart. Glad I don’t have to pay for college so far. A little different in South Texas. Funny thing is both have very cute girls falling all over themselves for the boys. Hopefully they won’t be stupid.


  78. These “My kids are natural alphas” and “My grandfather is the biggest alpha in history” posts are so tiring. What do you think you are adding to the discussion?


  79. on October 16, 2011 at 10:56 pm But inside doesn't matter

    We need a redefinition of values.

    How is the guy an asshole? He is women’s gift from God – being attractive, giving women what they want. He’s a wonderful guy.

    Betas are the real assholes. To themselves, for not pushing themselves hard enough, staying inside their comfort zone, being weak – and to women, because they annoy the shit out of women. Betas are massive assholes.


  80. [ re: Matador/tyrone/Anonymous ]

    Am a chick and in this debate I agree with… the lot of you.

    I agree that natural alphas (i.e. tall, great genetics, sense of humor, don’t-give-too-much of-a-fuck attitude) can successfully show -directional- kindness (naturally it’s the kindness balanced with firmness) and a man who has a big heart is attractive to so many women. We’ve all seen it, guy who can strum a guitar and pour out his heart, and then the swoons from women in the audience.

    I agree too that…

    Women are powerful.

    One often has to employ a lot of game, truly, to mitigate this power. It is the power of chaos, romance, abandon, magic, whim, nature and the swirling tides. (if that’s too lofty for you, it also often looks like: irrationality, mood swings, confusion, victim mentality, sneaking around issues, over-emotion, thinly-veiled sluttitude ready to ignite at any time, vulnerability)

    Men have the capacity to love deeply. They can be deeply wounded by their partners and I really believe it hurts them at the core, more than it does women. And I’m including the whole spectrum of designations from alpha to beta here. It is important that we cherish the love-and-protector power that men have.

    In a way, it’s almost as if society needs to rebalance and ‘protect the protector’ …and that’s how I see the work that’s being done with game.

    It all starts to get a bit circular, but that’s the beauty/the power of it. ~N


  81. Is there anyway to beat a Super-Alpha at his game? I wouldn’t do it to steal his girlfriend. I’d do it for an ego boost. To realize just how that damn good I am.


  82. […] relatively high human population, material wealth, and personal freedom.  Yet sufficiently bad incentives in the human mating market surely could destroy […]