We learn what to emulate from the successes of alpha male womanizers as much as we learn what to avoid from the failures of beta male saps. Toady’s inspirational AOTM is Porfirio Rubirosa, a legendary slayer of snatch born in the Dominican Republic to an upper middle class (and from the looks of him, white European) family.
He bedded thousands of women, including such legendary beauties as Ava Gardner, Jayne Mansfield, Eva Peron and Zsa Zsa Gabor.
Not only that, he married the two richest women in the world, first Doris Duke, then Barbara Hutton, and bedded another millionairess, Tina Onassis, as well as queens and countesses.
In the Forties and Fifties no high-society party or jet-set gathering was complete without him. But as the many women who wanted to possess him discovered to their cost, it was this Latin lover who always possessed them.
Preselected by women? Check.
Well-crafted identity? Check.
Chasee, rather than chaser? Check.
Used money to seduce women? Unchecked.
Porfirio Rubirosa — Rubi to his friends — was good-looking, although at 5ft 8in far from tall…
Male charm >>> male height. Judge for yourself if you think he’s good-looking:
Personally, I don’t see it. But then I’m no ‘mo, so most men look ugly to me. I suppose if you’re the bruised ego type who wants to believe only good-looking men get the ladies, you won’t be convinced that Rubirosa’s rise to poonhound fame was largely by virtue of his con and his charm. But keep in mind that the high society women he ran with had their pick of the world’s best-looking men, many of them far better looking than Porfirio, and yet they chose to surrender their bodies (and their fortunes) to this gnomic Latino. Obviously, he had something else going on for him than a devilish smile.
He never did a proper day’s work in his life — yet his success with women enabled him to mix with royalty and film stars, and own private jets, racing cars and polo ponies. He was charming, attentive and thoughtful, but prone to violent jealousy, graceless and utterly amoral.
Chicks dig charming, impulsively violent, sociopathic layabouts.
So what exactly was it that made Rubi the most desirable man on the planet, the man over whom the world’s richest heiresses competed?
The honored guests of Chateau Heartiste know. Let’s see if the Daily Mail knows.
Famously, his attraction lay not only in his mesmerising charm but his bedroom prowess — and his remarkable physical endowment. Along the Riviera and in the nightclubs of Paris and Manhattan, Rubi was known as ‘Toujours Pret’ — always ready — and the large peppermills in Parisian restaurants came to be known as ‘Rubirosas’ in homage his impressive appendage.
Yet, as a new biography makes clear, his rise to fame and riches was due as much to his ruthlessness as his virility. What distinguished him from other handsome young seducers was his astuteness, his ability to spot a vulnerable rich woman, to know the moment to strike and to make her feel desired and wanted.
Classic sneaky fucker (aka renegade alpha) game. He was not the accomplished, admired husband of a lonely trophy wife; he was the secret lover who traveled in shadow and brought promises of passion. His reputation as a great womanizer didn’t hurt him, either. Women can’t resist tempting the ardor of a known Lothario. It’s as if women love the feeling of getting burned, like a retarded child putting his hand near the flame again and again. Hurts so good.
Rubi had been unfaithful from the start of their marriage, but in Paris his womanising became relentless. If Flor [his first wife] remonstrated when he came home covered in lipstick, he would lash out with his fists.
Poon Commandment VIII: Never say you’re sorry.
Eventually she fled back home and they divorced. She later denigrated his sexual technique, complaining that he went on so long she grew bored. Nonetheless, for years after their divorce she continued to sleep with him whenever they met up.
Chris Brown high-fived Porfirio.
Now jobless and penniless — Trujillo had sacked him from his job as ‘Inspector of Embassies’ — Rubi was in desperate need of money. When a jeweller he knew asked him to retrieve some jewels from Madrid, then in the midst of civil war, Rudi agreed.
But he returned with — he said — only some of the jewels, claiming that the rest, worth some $180,000, had been lost when his car was shot at in an ambush; an unlikely explanation, as the car bore no bullet holes. He had, of course, stolen them.
The temperament that compels cads to thieve jewels is the same temperament that so enraptures women. This is why chicks dig jerks *because* they’re jerks, not *despite* their jerkiness.
Rubi further enriched himself by selling Dominican visas at inflated prices to Jews wishing to flee Nazi persecution as war loomed in Europe.
Chicks also dig a man who enriches himself, no matter how unethically. (I doubt Rubi was the kind of reflective man to make pained efforts to justify his actions as a karmic con of a con.)
With his newfound wealth, he had a nose job (he had always hated his broad nose). The best barber in Paris cut his hair, and the best tailor made his suits. His bespoke underpants were shipped over from London’s Jermyn Street and his shoes were handmade.
Bespoke underpants. The master seducer leaves no detail unattended.
He was even restored to his diplomatic post after Trujillo came to Paris and Rubi introduced him to the seamier side of Parisian nightlife, acting as Trujillo’s pimp, to the dictator’s delight.
Beta males are hounded for minor trangressions. Alpha males are quickly forgiven the worst sins.
‘Be careful, this man is dangerous,’ warned the hostess, but within weeks Danielle had left her husband for him.
The most melodious words a man can hear from a beautiful women are not “I love you”. They are “Be careful this man is dangerous.”
Doris [Duke] was the richest woman in the world, heiress to the American Tobacco fortune and worth a staggering $100 million. She had become a journalist following the collapse of her first marriage — her husband had been unable to accommodate her sexually. Rubi had no such difficulties. ‘His purpose was to satisfy women,’ Doris later recalled, and he achieved it with distinction.
Haters who whine that game is tantamount to doing a woman’s bidding should acquaint themselves with Porfirio, the man whose “purpose was to satisfy women.” Whose life would you rather have? A celibate’s who has gone his own way? Or a playboy’s who relishes the pleasure of women’s company?
Rubi’s flagrant infidelity upset Doris, while he chafed at her imperious ways: once, in Cannes, she sent him down to a hotel lobby to fetch some cigarettes. Her ran into an old girlfriend and did not return for three days.
Doris sought to secure his love with extravagant gifts: a townhouse in Paris, a stable full of polo ponies, several sports cars and even a converted B25 bomber.
Beta males buy women’s love and intimacy and call it a victory. Alpha males run into old girlfriends, disappear for days on high sexual adventure, and return to have magnificent gifts lavished them by the women they jilted.
What specific game tactics did Rubi use?
His seduction technique could be crude: seated next to a beautiful woman at dinner, he would take her hand and place it on his lap to show her just how exciting he found her.
Massive kino escalation.
At other times he was more romantic. When he met the film star Zsa Zsa Gabor in a New York hotel, she was married to her third husband George Sanders, a handsome but violently jealous actor. Undeterred, Rubi had her suite filled with red roses. Zsa Zsa invited him into bed and was hooked.
Unpredictability is king. So is knowing your mark’s weaknesses.
Rubi frequently hit her, once blacking her eye just before she was due on stage, but still she found him irresistible, describing him as a ‘sickness’.
Women are aware, on some primal level, that their attraction for the baddest badboys is a sickness to which they can’t help but succumb. Women, in their uncontrollable servitude, loathe the machinations of their own tingles.
Rubi saw a solution to his money problems and set about wooing her, serenading her with a band outside her bedroom window. The fact he had previously been married to her friend and rival Doris Duke made Barbara determined to have him, too. Months later, in December 1953, he had become her fifth husband and she his fourth wife.
Women are natural rivals, at each others’ throats not with daggers, but with innuendo and whisperings. Master seducers exploit this reality about the fairer sex.
Like Doris Duke, Barbara showered him with gifts including an estate in the Dominican Republic and another B25 plane, but he continued to humiliate her with his infidelity and cruelty.
Chicks dig a man who is a challenge. Women don’t want to gaily traipse over your dreary flatlands; they want to strain climbing your rugged mountain peak.
One night, at a dinner party, she punched him and walked out. Rubi merely shrugged, then flew off to join Zsa Zsa Gabor.
Aloof indifference. It’s an acid bath to a woman’s defenses.
The marriage was over: it had lasted a mere three months, but once again left Rubi considerably richer.
What man wouldn’t love to have this guy’s life? Garish pussy buffet, bestowed riches after every bedroom conquest.
until in Paris in 1956, aged 47, he met a pretty 19-year-old actress named Odile Rodin.
‘I’ve heard much about you, Monsieur,’ she told him. ‘None of it good.’ But like all the others, her resistance soon crumbled and before long they were lovers, then were married.
“I’ve heard much about you… none of it good.” The second best thing a man can hear from a beautiful woman.
But if he had finally found a girl who could tame him, it was too late. In 1965, after drinking all night at the nightclub Jimmy’s in celebration of a polo win, Rubi drove home at 7am and crashed his Ferrari into a tree. The steering column crushed his chest and he died on the way to hospital.
He was 56. He had lived and died fast. After nearly four decades of partying, he had little to show for his life. He had never had children — despite his virility, he was sterile — and had spent all the money he acquired.
So sad. And yet, the memories Porfirio carries with him to his afterlife are the same memories that a typical, play-by-the-rules, dutiful beta male who married one woman and bore three kids brings to his afterlife: None. When the cosmic tally is taken of each man’s life, the only difference will be in how they lived while they were alive. And on that account, Porfirio lived a hell of a lot more than the niceguy office drone who rejoiced when his chubby wife relented and gave him a birthday BJ.