Reader Mailbag: Abandonment Protocol Edition

Email #1

A father seeks advice on how to helpfully navigate his daughter past badboy shoals:

My daughter has just turned 16 and has a throng of suitors persuing her (she’s easily a high 8, inherited the best feminine mix of traits from a Chinese mother & white father). However, I have no illusions about the id that lurks within her & it’s susceptibility to aloof assholes.

My question is what can I do as a father to reduce the risk of having some smirking lowlife with tight game (Like Josh Camacho from the latest ‘Chicks Dig Jerks’) ruining my daughter for a legitimately high-status husband or having his bastard whelp become my grandchild.

One word: belittle.

Remember, you are still the ultimate alpha male in her life. The pinnacle of authority. Does the ultimate alpha sweat challenges from upstart alphalings? No. He laughs them off. If you get to feeling that she’s drifting into a crowd of jerks and nah boys, you react like you would if you were her alpha male boyfriend: tease her for her childish taste in men. Tell her, “I think that boy (always use the term “boy”) with the dorky tattoo has a puppy crush on you. He gets so tongue-tied around you. Maybe you can teach him how to speak like an adult?”

If the wigger tool ever winds up at your house, that is your opportunity to humiliate him in front of your daughter with extreme prejudice. You want to plant the seed in your daughter’s head that her asshole suitor is lame, nerdy, stupid, humorless, immature, gullible and, most disparaging, cowardly. She won’t appreciate your intervention, but, like a toddler hearing a new word and repeating it days later after it has sunk in, the slanderous seed will have germinated in her brain and poisoned her puerile love for the prick, eventually driving a hypergamously-lubed wedge between them.

I understand your fear, though, because a daughter succumbing to a worthless layabout’s charms is just about a father’s worst nightmare come true.

My advice to would-be fathers: pray you have all sons. That way if they get their fuck on, you will feel proud instead of panicked.

Email #2

A reader requests break-up advice:

Do you have any suggestions for breaking up with a girlfriend that give you the upper-hand but without being too hurtful to her?

She is of almost a year, a nice girl and pretty sensitive. There’s probably no easy way to do it, but don’t want a rep as a cheater or anything like that. (I’ve already cheated on her anyways but don’t want to be known as that)

Any suggestions would be much appreciated. thanks

It’s (almost) impossible to both initiate a painless break up with a girl and retain the upper hand, if by “upper hand” we mean awesome alpha maleness. As long as she doesn’t want the break-up, she will be hurt, no matter how delicately you deliver the news. The only surefire method for breaking up with a girl that leaves her feeling relieved rather than hurt is to go Full Metal Beta over the course of a few months, until she’s sick of your mewling.

Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: [sniffing] Holy Jesus! What is that? What the fuck is that? WHAT IS THAT, PRIVATE BOYFRIEND?
You: Ma,am, a scented poem, ma’am!
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: A scented poem?
You: Ma’am, yes, ma’am!
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: How did it get here?
You: Ma’am, I wrote it for you and watermarked it with my tears of joy.
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: Is a scented poem supposed to make me feel better?
You: Ma’am, yes, ma’am!
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: Are you thinking I want to have sex with you because of this scented poem?
You: Ma’am, yes, ma’am!
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: And why, Private Boyfriend?
You: Ma’am, because it’s proof that you are my world, ma’am!
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: Because you are a disgusting cloying beta, Private Boyfriend, I DO NOT want to have sex with you!
You: Ma’am, yes, ma’am!
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: Then why did you try to write this poem for me, Private Boyfriend?
You: Ma’am, because I was seeking your approval, ma’am!
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: Because you were seeking my approval… [grabs her phone to show Private Boyfriend all the texts from aspiring suitors]
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: Private Boyfriend, you have dishonored yourself and dishonored the male gender. I have tried to drop hints. But I have failed. I have failed because you suddenly decided that supplicating betatude is what I needed, despite all fucking evidence to the contrary. So, from now on, as a show of proof that your way is the way of failure, I want you to read this text conversation I had last night with a man who understands me the way you used to. Notice the part where I thank him for letting me puff on his peter. [shoves phone in Private Boyfriend’s face]
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: Are you feeling ill yet?
You: Ma’am, does this mean we’re broken up, ma’am?
Gunnery Sergeant Hamster: You’re goddamned right this means we’re broken up, maggot!
You: [phew]

This will work, but you sure won’t feel like you left with the upper hand. My suggestion, if you want to dump her using less manipulative tactics while sparing her feelings as best you can, is to tell her that, although you love her in many ways, you never got over your ex-girlfriend, and you recently met her and fell in love again. For whatever reason, girls are more forgiving of rifts caused by the return of an old love you have nursed for years. It hits their romance buttons.

Or just announce that you’re gay.

Email #3

A college student wants to know why the sex is drying up:

I’m a Senior college student who has been in a great relationship for 9 months.  The past two months my gf has often not been in the mood.  What do i do? getting denied drives me crazy

1. She’s recently gotten in touch with an ex-boyfriend she still likes.

2. She recently met, however innocently, an alpha male who pushed all her buttons.

3. You’re turning Betanese.

4. Some combination of all the above.

Without more info, I can’t tell you which of those explanations is relevant in your case, but the cause of her sexual withdrawal is most likely one of those reasons. My advice: Begin abandonment protocol. Women value men who are mysterious and scarce; your job is to give her that little reminder that you can’t be taken for granted. A calculated disappearing act should do the trick. Double down by being seen by her in the company of other women.

Whatever you do, DO NOT beg for sex, in any manner. Sticking around like an underfed puppy dog waiting on table scraps is a guaranteed way to reduce your attractiveness to zero.

Email #4

Somewhat long-ish reader request to analyze his game:

I went to a bar I never go to in order to see a band I really like tonight. I had a great time, and afterward I was busy talking to a friend and he encouraged me to go talk to some girls. I was drunk, so I felt more confident than usual, but I still couldn’t bring myself to do it since I’m so inexperienced at cold approaches.

Then a girl I haven’t seen much of since high school came up to me. She’s very attractive and thus is very used to guys hitting on her, so I knew if I was going to make it happen I would need tight game. We talked for a few moments, I initiated some physical contact and then I let her wander off to see her friends. My friend gave me a pep talk to go back after it. After getting my mind in the right place and ordering another drink, I wandered upstairs to see if I could locate her.

I went onto the balcony and she was in a large group comprising mostly people I know from high school but haven’t seen in a while. They invited me to join the group. I was a loser in high school, but I feel that I did very well tonight putting up the image that I’m confident and secure in myself. It was probably the alcohol, but it taught me how I should be most of the time.

I was in the group for a while and engaged the different girls individually, knocking each off their pedestal and emitting an aura of dominance. These are the girls that require negs, and I made effective use of them. I was on my game for 95% of the night, but I might have screwed up in the end by showing too much interest in the girl I’m after. To be fair, this is a high-quality girl that requires a flawless performance, and I feel like I would have definitely been successful if it had been someone of lower quality. I was feeling it tonight, but I might have screwed up a bit. I’m inexperienced at this sort of thing but I would have never imagined that I would have been as confident as I was. Regardless of how this situation works out, it’s a building block for my game.

Toward the end, when the girls said they were going to another bar, I attempted to stop the girl I’m after. Since our high school isn’t too far away from where we now attend college and she generally attends high school football games and such since her mother teaches there, I asked her if she’d be at homecoming next weekend (we’ve been out for three years now — we’re both 21). She said she thought it was last week (a definite lie) and started to walk off and said that she would come back to this bar later. I told her to “wait just a goddamn minute” and stomped out my cigarette and followed the group inside. I tapped her on the head from behind but she ignored me.

Her (smoking hot) friend stayed behind as they walked off and engaged me. Conversation goes as follows (using a neg I pulled from a PUA site, possible this one but I can’t remember):

Me: “Is she always like this?”
Her: “What’s she being like?”
Me: “Well, she’s kind of being a bitch. Tell her that it’s not too late to enroll in charm school. I hear that’s making a big comeback.”

Her group left, and I promptly bounced instead of waiting around to see if they’d come back. I have a feeling that they didn’t, and I sure as fuck wasn’t going to be the chump that sat around waiting or followed them to the other bar. I got in my car and drove off.

So, how should I proceed from here? I’m hoping her friend gave her my message. I usually don’t get too much into PUA philosophy but it was needed here as I was punching way above my weight. All in all, even if I did fuck up, I did way better than I could have imagined.

I know that it’s preached in PUA circles that if you need advice on how to pursue a girl that you won’t get her, but I’m going to try to play this one out to the end. Can I salvage this?

Don’t depend on a girl’s friends to “deliver” your tight game her. She has to be there in your company, hearing you spit it. If anything, calling her a bitch to her friend is going to make you look weak and insecure as it winds its way through the female grapevine, which is, as if it needed saying, utterly out of your control to influence as an outsider to the group.

I don’t know if it’s salvageable with the girl you really want, but her lying about not knowing the date of the homecoming tells me that she probably thought you were trying to slyly insinuate yourself into her homecoming plans. I don’t think it looks good, because I’m not seeing any signals of interest from her in your retelling of the night’s events. You should mack her friend, instead.

Email #5

A reader asks:

Would definitely appreciate your thoughts or a post on good/funny lines to reopen texting that dies down. Have a great weekend.

Non sequitur game.

Email #6

A reader wants to know where he dropped the balls:

Hey, I love your website and I have learned a great deal from you. Can you give me your input on something? I’m very confused. I’ll try and keep it short.

I’ve been hanging out with this girl about once every other week for a couple months. We have slept in the same bed multiple times (no sex…every time I go for her pussy, she pushes my hand away.) we have made out, spooned, messed around, pretty much everything except sex.

She invited me over and she cooked dinner for me a little over a week ago and we always split the bill when we go out.

At dinner she told me she gave her ex a second chance, but he never changed and is the same person so she is done for good with him. And she went to the fair with some guy that puked on the ride with her, and she has been ignoring him since Then she asks me if I have met any cute girls lately (shit test?).

I texted her Sunday night and she never replied. I haven’t talked to her since she made me dinner over a week ago.

When I first met her I was a huge dick to her, buying everyone drinks except her, etc. She was really into me. But I have started being nicer to her lately and I think that is why she is losing attraction for me. Her last Facebook status said “It seems that I have a thing for men who are from Scotland, Ireland, and London… Maybe I wasn’t meant to live in the U.S. because I can’t seem to find a guy that compares to men from Europe.”  Her ex is Scottish.

Tell me where I went wrong here, was it because I turned down the asshole vibe?

You, sir, are a train wreck, and your spilled cargo is a debris field of beta. First, NEVER platonically sleep in the same bed with a girl you desire. The bed is sacred. The bed is enthroned. The bed is where your kingship is ratified. The bed is where the penis meets the vagina. Or at least some orifice that is a reasonable facsimile of the vagina.

Multiple times you have lain next to her in bed, your balls filled with unexpectorated sperms? Multiple times she has pushed your hand away, taunting you like a cat might paw at an injured mouse before delivering the killing bite? On top of all this slander to your manhood, she casually regales you over dinner with tales of the ex-boyfriend she obviously still loves? (Don’t let her precise words to the contrary fool you; a woman who mentions an old lover out of the blue still pines for him.) And finally, the shiv strikes soft underbelly when she asks if you’ve found yourself a nice girl.

Can’t you see what’s going on here? I’ll just cut to the chase. You are the classic betaboy emotional tampon. An asexual lump who listens like a champ, restrains his sexual urges with stoic mastery, and feeds her need for self-esteem.

She has never “seen you that way”. Something happened over that last dinner that scared her away. Probably you said something which revealed a hint of your animal desire for her, something which crossed the invisible line demarcating the friendship zone she thought was operational, that jolted her comfy world where the two of you are cute little cartoon friends without sexual organs who talk girl stuff all the day and night, and with whom she can unload her issues she has with jerks who know how to make her pussy quake.

My final judgment: lost cause. Excise her from your life like she’s a tumor, because that’s exactly what she is, an emotional tumor sucking nutrients from the manlier portions of your viscera. Yes, you most likely blew it when you turned to the Nice Side, somewhere between the time you stopped gunning for her pussy to instead “hang out” in perpetuity, and the time you voluntarily bedded with her without the usual payoff that most men expect from such intimate arrangement. Accompany an alpha male friend to hit on girls, to help get your head screwed on right.


  1. To the guy who wrote email #3. The chick is talking to another guy.

    “You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you can not fool all the people all of the time.”

    -Abraham Lincoln


    • “I’m a Senior college student who has been in a great relationship for 9 months. The past two months my gf has often not been in the mood. What do i do? getting denied drives me crazy.”

      He be blind. The phrases “geat relationship” & “two months… not in the mood” do not belong together.

      And oh, she’s been doing more than talking.


    • Not necessarily. She simple knows she has him locked down.

      ‘Disappearance’ are an awesome weapon, so hard to do, but really, really key.


    • senior COLLEGE STUDENT, get your head out of your ass and ditch the relationship. there are freshmen girls to take down, you sucker. it will never be easier than while you’re still on campus.


  2. First, NEVER platonically sleep in the same bed with a girl you desire. The bed is sacred. The bed is enthroned. The bed is where your kingship is ratified. The bed is where the penis meets the vagina. Or at least some orifice that is a reasonable facsimile of the vagina.


    All you young guys out there listening? It’s gospel truth.

    And older guys, too.

    Believe, bruthas!


    • 99.99% of the time this is correct. Now let me regale you with a tale of the pixie lesbian. It was in my early 20’s she was and still is gay. I suspected that she was abused somehow in some way and had a great fear of men.

      I invested 2 weeks including 2 over night sessions of spooning with zero moves on my part…patience young hunters patience. We were “friends” before hand so this was my response to some lesbian heartbreak she had endured.

      Soon after I started seeing someone else frequently and had to cut off that kind of kino with her. It was only one night but bingo.

      Game. Set. Match. The day Captain Jack bagged the trophy pixie lesbian.


      • So, in other words, if she’s a lezbo, it’s ok.


      • Corvinus the lesson is use the most effective game for the given situation don’t be dense. In the vast majority of situations Burton and others hit the nail on the head. This was a rare case where doing one unconventional thing first followed by typical game yielded an rare gain. Game is not about always following a set formula 100% of the time.


      • on October 24, 2012 at 11:35 am Thasswhatimtalkinbout


        Good outcomes do not equal good strategies.

        What this guy did was win the lottery. For most of us, buying lottery tickets is a really bad strategy.


      • And .01% of comments are total BS.


  3. ‘My advice to would-be fathers: pray you have all sons. That way if they get their fuck on, you will feel proud instead of panicked.’

    Best advice in this post. Fortunately, this can now be controlled.


    • It’s working out really well for India and China…


    • Statistically, most sons will turn out beta. And in the Western world, they end end up paying alimony and child support to fat exes.

      Daughters in the Western world are guaranteed financial support in the form of paying betas and have welfare (if they pump out kids) as a minimum safety net. Western parents subconsciously know this and in America, many parents prefer and select their child’s gender to the point that the sex ratio is skewed toward girls.

      The boys that are not aborted and make it to birth have a tough road in a society that actively tries to weed them out via lack of education, jobs, and financial support.


      • The United States is one of the few countries with no apparent gender bias. Most places in the world prefer boys to girls; it’s just that India and China are most notorious for it.

        The Chinese are the most ridiculous… not only do they still prefer boys, but they do so even though the Chinese economy, like the American one, is biased toward girls. Not only that, but Chinese guys don’t have many options in the mating department; there aren’t enough Chinese women to go around — there aren’t even enough Asian women to go around — and women of other races don’t usually want them due to their misogynistic and beta/omega behavior.


    • LOL, my husband is *terrified* we’ll have a girl with the next pregnancy. He keeps saying, “I’ll catch a murder charge. I will.”


  4. email #1. Pay her friends to casually refer to her prospective boyfriend as “creepy.” Just once is all it will take.


  5. “My advice to would-be fathers: pray you have all sons. That way if they get their fuck on, you will feel proud instead of panicked.”

    1) Make sure the swimmers with the Y chromosome are better than the swimmers with the X.

    2) Do it doggy style all the time. You’ll be safe that way.


  6. on October 23, 2012 at 2:53 pm RappaccinisDaughter

    re: E-mail #1. Belittling might work; for his sake, I hope it does.

    My AlphaDad went with glares, muttered clenched-jaw warnings and cleaning his guns on the kitchen table when boys came to pick me up. All it did was goad me on and get me to change tactics. I got so good at sneaking out of the house, I probably missed my calling as a cat burglar.


    • Sounds like Mr. Rappaccini is your basic Clueless Dad, like most. Took the tripping of a few mental breakers, but I think I know how this works. Belittling, dismissing and making the potential BF seem irrelevant and Beta/Delta (or worse) are your best defense. Attacking him ( ‘racist’ comments, questioning his intelligence, will ALWAYS backfire, it’ll just push her onto him even harder. Literally. Top Tip No.1: If he isn’t SUPERTALL make fun of his height. He’ll be an Ex before he knew what hit him. Almost as good: Welcome him into the family with fatherly and motherly warmth, like an angel savior for their beloved babee gurl. Nothing will dry up your daughters’ love juices faster than her parents LIKING her boyfriend.


      • Then you reframe everything he says or does to seem like he’s a nice guy beta. You can reframe everything he does to seem insecure, or needy, or coming from fear and scarcity. That he’s low status and is doing what he does because he knows he could never get another girl as good as the daughter.


      • on October 23, 2012 at 5:27 pm RappaccinisDaughter

        AlphaDad wasn’t *entirely* clueless. Taught his tomboy daughter how to hunt and shoot and throw a punch. I guess he figured that if he couldn’t keep me off “the carousel,” he could at least make it so nothing would happen without my consent.


      • And how did that work out for your love life? Not being catty with this at all, just asking honestly.


      • on October 24, 2012 at 10:03 am RappaccinisDaughter

        No worries, Spiralina, I didn’t take it that way.

        It’s hard to say, honestly, how much of the way my love life has played out has to do with nature (the low-digit-ratio thing), and how much to do with nurture.

        I wasn’t ever particularly attracted to “bad boys.” I’d watch my female friends going gaga over them, and I’d be telling them, “Girl, are we even talking about the same guy? He used to torture squirrels in the sixth grade! He’s a freak, stay away from him.” Not that they ever listened.

        Meanwhile, I’d be sneaking out of my house to go meet up with one of the two boyfriends I had when I was in high school–both of whom were sensitive-artist types and significantly older than I was. I guess in the CH argot, “beta providers.” I didn’t run afoul of my first real bad boy until after college. Oof. That was awful. An experience I never want to repeat.


      • I have a low digit ratio and I get annoyed at what I see as “bad boy” behavior. I realize that men sometimes have to do this to stand up for themselves and others and I understand it in those cases. Men just being selfish jerks and trying to push others around because they can is irritating, though.


      • @Rapp, @Lara,

        Both my daughters have Low Digit Ratio (LDR) so I know something of this, as have a couple of my sisters too. It doesn’t mean that you are not girls, just that you’ll be more competitive, assertive, controlling and harder to manage for a wannabe suitor. But make no mistake, LDR or not, any girl that meets an Alpha who is more assertive and controlling than they are, will get the tingles – the only downside is that they are going to have a smaller proportion of men to choose from…


      • Spin, hamster. Spin.


      • on October 24, 2012 at 10:39 am RappaccinisDaughter

        Genuinely curious about where you’re seeing the hamster, Heywood.


      • AlphaDad wasn’t *entirely* clueless. Taught his tomboy daughter how to hunt and shoot and throw a punch. I guess he figured that if he couldn’t keep me off “the carousel,” he could at least make it so nothing would happen without my consent.

        Don’t want to put words in Heywood’s mouth, but here’s what I think he’s getting at with “seeing the hamster”.

        1) AlphaDad – maybe a true alphadad COULD have kept you off the self-admitted carousel… all dads/husbands of the women on this site are alphas, go figure… but it may be he was just a manly beta.

        2) tomboy – a lot of conflicting signals here… proud to be a tomboy, yet in high demand by other alleged alphas in that she was able to ride the carousel… and proud that she could “handle herself”.

        3) “hunt and shoot and throw a punch” – heh, heh… Charlies Angels syndrome… what, no swordsmanship, a la Uma Thurman?

        Anyway, that’s my take on why he mentioned the hamster.

        I could be wrong.


      • on October 24, 2012 at 1:04 pm RappaccinisDaughter

        @Greg: Ah, I see. You make some good points there.

        In re: #1: Of course I see my father as an alpha. It’s going to be hard for me to be objective about that. I imagine it would be difficult for most men as well.

        In re: #2: Yeah, I’m a tomboy and I never grew out of it. But I have never claimed to be in high demand by alphas, and believe it or not, am not a big carousel rider (at least as I understand the concept of “the carousel”). So, you tell me: Does a pattern of monogamous long-term relationships, the shortest of which has been three months, unfold to the brassy strains of the Callio-penis?

        3. Nope, no swords. And I’ve never actually hit another human being in anger, either.


      • Does a pattern of monogamous long-term relationships, the shortest of which has been three months, unfold to the brassy strains of the Callio-penis?

        Depends upon pattern frequency, I suppose. Three months does seem like a LTR… to a hamster. 😉

        Golf clap on Callio-penis pun… though self-Erato-cism would have strained less brass.


      • Tomboys are not in high demand by alphas. In my experience, they tend to go for the prettiest, most feminine women.


      • on October 24, 2012 at 1:34 pm RappaccinisDaughter

        ^ What Lara said.


      • @Rapp,

        An Alpha Dad would not be teaching his daughter to throw a punch?! Why on earth would he do that?
        Seems like you were a substitute son to him… rather than a daughter…


      • on October 24, 2012 at 12:55 pm RappaccinisDaughter

        Oh, I was kind of a substitute son, no doubt about that. I knew it at the time, too. Didn’t bother me then and it doesn’t bother me now.


      • on October 24, 2012 at 1:38 pm RappaccinisDaughter

        @ That Guy:

        Actually, statistics show that not fighting back at all significantly increases a woman’s chances of being seriously harmed. (Figures for the “pantload” strategy were unavailable.) You’re correct that unarmed self-defense also increases a woman’s chances of being harmed.

        Armed self-defense is the way to go.


      • You never know when it might come in handy. I would only use it if he or she hit me first and wasn’t significantly weaker than I am. I can’t imagine ever hitting a feminine woman, I find them easy to get along with.
        I’ve never had to do it, yet.


      • @Lara,

        You cannot be serious! Punching doesn’t work in a girl’s favor almost ever.

        I know many of you think that knowing how to “throw a punch” will help you defend against would be muggers or rapists and the like, but you’re forgetting that you’ll be throwing a “girl punch”, which a would be attacker will barely notice.

        BTW, the best defense against a guy who want’s to rape you is:
        1. NOT fight back – as then you run the risk of getting seriously beaten up or killed
        2. Poop your panties – as that will end any further interest, in most cases


      • I’ve never had the need to hit anyone as an adult, and I can’t imagine any situation in which I would. As a woman, every conflict I can imagine is either not serious enough, or too serious for throwing punches to be effective.


      • 3. Tell him about your day.


      • That Guy,
        Yes, I’ve heard that pooping your pants is the best way to stop a rape. If you can do it, I would assume it would work.


      • Didn’t that blonde chick’s dad welcome “bring the movies guy” into the family. ” He couldn’t keep Sarah away from Josh, so he invited Josh over for dinner, took him to ball games. To keep an eye on him.

        “Don’t let nothing happen to her,” he said.” We all know how that turned out.


      • I’d have called him a bitch and given him a wedgee. He was a scrawny little shit. A little alpha behavior could have prevented this tragedy.


      • Torturing squirrels,eh? There’s a winner…….I’d kill that brotherfucker on sight.One of the things women like to claim they are looking for in men is kindness to animals. In real life, however, it seems as though they are actually repelled by men who care for animals and/or have pets.


      • on October 24, 2012 at 10:36 am RappaccinisDaughter

        I’m as confused as you are by that whole thing, Wolfie. Even my one “bad boy” was nice to animals. Just not to me.


  7. Tweet
    “Study finds sexism rampant in nature.”

    That was in the onion, dude.
    Hella funny though.


  8. Re: Email #2, breaking up like a man.

    My strategy has been to forcefully articulate the ways in which I need to focus on my career. Tell her you care for her too much to neglect her as you focus mightily on your career. Basically LJBF her–it’s the best strategy because that’s what a girl would do. You must learn from them, young Jedi. Continue to hang out with her platonically. Hit on her hot friends and bang the best ones, but only for ONS.

    You will definitely maintain hand that way, since you’ve not violated the Alpha code in any way, and you will also DHV yourself in social circles.

    She will be your alpha widow if you do this right, which leaves the door open for some really hot ex-sex every now and again, probably even if she’s with somebody else.


    • Couldn’t agree with this more. LJBF is definitely the best way to go. As Revo Luzione mentioned you do not lose alpha cred, keep her interested in you and increase your value in the eyes of her friends.

      For best results, use their own phrases against them:
      “I just feel we need to take a break”
      “Sometimes people were just meant to be friends”
      ” *bullshit compliment on top of bullshit compliment*, but I think it would be more comfortable for us if we were just friends”


      • “It’s me, not you”
        “We need to see other people”
        “I’m just not feeling it anymore”
        “You aren’t exciting to me”

        If you’ve been with enough women…you should have a good idea what phrases to use to break up with them.

        [heartiste: these are all standard operating procedure if you don’t care how hurt she will be by the break-up, but the reader asked how he could break it off without hurting her at all. a monumental task, to which i gave a monumentally effortful suggestion.]


      • “Don’t give me the ‘it’s not you, it’s me routine… I invented ‘it’s not you, it’s me!”

        “All right, George… it’s you.”

        “You’re damn right, it’s me!”


      • Yeah, I think the reader was asking how to break up *without* being harsh or hurting her feelings, which is a more delicate procedure.

        In addition to the ex-girlfriend thing, the ‘wounded warrior’ excuse works too. “I’ve just been hurt so many times in the past, I’m not even sure how to love anymore. A girl like you deserves someone who can give you their whole heart, and I…just can’t do that right now.” Look away wistfully. Sniffing away tears adds bonus points for extreme betatude.


      • three weeks ago, i was sentenced to “it’s me, not you”.

        that did not make me feel any better after a two and a half year relationship 😦


      • Sorry to hear that 😦 Would you care for a virtual cookie? (no calories!)


      • on October 23, 2012 at 9:47 pm gunslingergregi

        yes geishakate you should wear only dresses to make the world a more beautiful place but how could you not have the loot to get them they aren’t that much money


      • Can do!


      • thank you. you are so sweet. (i don’t mind calories as long as it is nice and sweet.)


      • It just so happens I have an entire batch of your favorite kind! Please share with the other annonoi 🙂


      • on October 23, 2012 at 10:08 pm gunslingergregi

        feel lucky if you weren’t married


      • yeah, i do feel lucky for that reason. but still, it doesn’t make me feel happy.


      • (Different Anonymous)

        “It doesn’t make me feel happy.”

        Friend, just like “we are all responsible for our own orgasm”, we are also all responsible for our own happiness. Happiness is a skill, and it must be created with the tools you were given. Looking to a woman to create happiness for you is a long, bad road you should not go down.

        Pull the sword from the stone.


      • yeah. gotcha, different anonymous.

        i did laugh out loud this morning when i heard on the radio a beluga whale trying to sing like a person.


      • Pick a fucking nickname, you faggots.


    • IMHO, breaking up or denying the dating relationship status is a good entryway to breakup sex and bootycallism…if you’ve actually gotten into the girl’s heart. It’s like a macro-cosmic push pull. You won’t touch every girl that way but when you do and you’re not ready to go exclusive, it’s a winner. Point break breaking up beats the fade away and the be-mean to get her to break up with you approach. Don’t bother giving reasons. She’ll want to stay naked friends. Surely, it beats the months of betadom to break game in which she just wants to be friends, and by that she means never talking to you again.


      • “….a macro-cosmic push pull.” Excellent turn of phrase. So is “naked friends.”

        I do think reasons matter, but I can see some hamster-food utility in not giving a reason.

        The Chateau’s response to the OP also gave an excellent alternative that is underappreciated–“I’m still carrying a torch for my ex.” Like he said, it hits the romance buttons. It still lets you pull the LJBF, and it gives you plausible deniability for future booty calls.


  9. on October 23, 2012 at 3:23 pm another Brazilian dude

    Re: email #4

    “To be fair, this is a high-quality girl that requires a flawless performance, and I feel like I would have definitely been successful if it had been someone of lower quality.”

    Man, I understand what you’re trying here, and I know it might be difficult not to fall in it, but don’t you see it’s a trap?

    I want to play it tight, too, but if I have to say myself I must be flawless to get some girl, basically I’m telling myself — not just once, I bet you repeated this to yourself like all night — I’m usually a mess, flawed from head to the soles of feet. Besides, you’re playing different game — different, not flexible, adaptative game — around, making among all the girls you desire some distinctions I don’t think could be good for you.


    • “To be fair, this is a high-quality girl that requires a flawless performance, and I feel like I would have definitely been successful if it had been someone of lower quality.”

      uh huh, flawless game=pack of marlboros and a functioning ford escort.


  10. My suggestion if you find yourself in a sexless bed… flee post-haste. If she asks where you’re going, say that the bed is too cold and you’re going to a warmer bed. If she tries to answer logically (I’ll get more sheets, etc.) just grunt “meh” or “nah” and head for the door.


  11. “NEVER platonically sleep in the same bed with a girl you desire.”

    The exception being if it is your bed. If she’s unhappy, let her spend an uncomfortable night in the couch, not you.


  12. Dude 4, going after dreamgirl. Maybe not the best move to pull as a rookie, especially when you got the oneitis.

    Her (smoking hot) friend stayed behind as they walked off and engaged me.

    And you … ? talk about the other chick?
    This is a pivot. Pivot don’t dwell.


  13. “Gunnery Sergeant Hamster”

    That was AWESOME.


  14. I’ve never been a fan of sleeping in the same bed with any woman whether I desire her or not. They take up most of the bed, all the covers, and keep me up at night.

    I’d go separate beds for sleeping…push them together for fun time.


  15. To #2 – How to break up Alpha style – and leave her wanting more:

    I’ve done this so many times, and pretty much any girl I’ve ever dated would get with me again in a heartbeat, if they could. To me it’s very simple, I just say:

    Me: “I’ve thought about the two of us, and it’s not going to work out…”
    Hottie: “What do you mean?!”
    Me: “I’m leaving, it’s for the best…”
    Hottie: “But why??”
    Me: “I can’t explain now… in time you’ll understand…” (exit the building)

    This is GUARANTEED to make her remember you in the best possible way, for the longest possible time…

    You’re welcome!


  16. Why doesn’t he want to hurt her? Isn’t part of life learning to deal with pain? Isn’t pain the best possible, most effective teacher?

    You’re depriving her of an opportunity to learn from this situation.

    Also, I highly recommend the LJBF pathway. It gives her hamster cover and fuel to run rampant, and as everyone knows, exercise is a good way to deaden the pain.


  17. To #1:


  18. Emiler #4 definitely came across as a butthurt bitterbeta. “Wait just a goddamn minute” and tap her on the head? Seriously? To Emailers #3, #4, and #6: the only way to get a woman is to convincingly behave as if you don’t really want her, or couldn’t care less, but at the same time, you are a fun guy that she enjoys talking to and spending time with. It’s very tricky. You want them to initiate, especially if they have a boyfriend in the background. And let’s face it, any hot girl (at least, that you want) has a boyfriend, at least in the background. One great way to inure yourself is to go out and meet lots of 8s, 9s, and (if possible) 10s. FTOW for those without game.

    I have been trying to get this right all my adult life, but not long after I started reading this blog, I got a short-term relationship. The strange thing was, she was definitely being the aggressor, but she thought I was. Says it all. It ended (Emailer #2, are you reading this?) when I flirted with a few considerably hotter girls at a party; she was only a 6, so it was easy. She got sad and withdrew after that. From reading between the lines, aided by CH, it turned out that she was thinking of me as a beta bitch to marry, after leaving her alpha asshole boyfriend. She went back to the ex soon afterwards.

    But the experience, along with reading CH, taught me a huge amount about how women think and why they go after the men they do. Last week I got the number of a bona-fide near-10 who dropped the class we were both in by keeping all this in mind. All I had done with her was idly chat with her a few times after class by walking with her a couple of blocks (because we happened to both be going that way), and keep a dominant alpha presence in class. She even gave it to me without my asking for it directly. After all, getting her to think “He seems really cool, and this class sucks, but I might want to hook up with him later, so I’ll give him my number” is a much better indicator of a potential future hookup than the behavior the girls in these emails are showing.


    • “I told her to “wait just a goddamn minute” and stomped out my cigarette and followed the group inside. I tapped her on the head from behind but she ignored me.”

      This just hurt to read. He still hasn’t gotten over his loser status in high school. The only difference now is he has enough rudimentary game to chat briefly to the homecoming queen before she’s sated with attention and decides to let him down nicely. And then when another hot girl opens him, he uses the opportunity to…bitch about the homecoming queen? He needs to work on his inner game and self-confidence, because that’s just painful.


      • Also, this kind of bitter, desperate beta behavior is why women invented the shorthand term “creepy.” And that’s why she ignored him.


      • lolz, inadvertent game worked on/for #4. He froze out smoking hot friend to chat up the old homecoming queen, piquing smoking hot friend’s interest…which he ignored.
        That’s the trend, someone learns of game, becomes an ahole. Concur, it was painful, don’t want to read closely, I just hope that #4’s neg game wasn’t too outrageous.


      • “He needs to work on his inner game and self-confidence”

        What do you know about that? Bitch!
        You have a vagina, get the fuck outta here.


      • Lol, Anon is anonning again.


      • Nope. Bitter, desperate, beta behavior is creepy.


      • Its not sexy?


      • Emphatically no.

        Here’s a geek analysis of creep, if that helps:


      • She’s right.


      • Yeah, that was super stupid.

        Like I said, guys: talk to and charm many different girls. Don’t try to get all their numbers; just talk to them. And the surprising thing is, if you do that, you start running into other cute girls who seem to know who you are, and the process snowballs. Then, now that you know a whole slew of hotties, your inner confidence is rock-solid and a few of them start fancying you, rather than the mediocre old fat single moms that you had coming on to you before. That, guys, is Charlie Sheen Winning.


  19. I credit Heartsy for introducing me to writing of the last psych blog. TLP ended recent column with advice on bullying that was essentially teach your kids to fight back always. Same for dumping bitches. Just do it. If you can keep her as a sometime piece of ass, that’s better. Take your lumps as she sits there and acts like the worst piece of beta-drama (crying and hollering) you’ve ever done as a AFG and terminate that shit.


  20. If you ever think “I have to run perfect game I can’t mess this up.” You’ve already lost. I don’t think a hookup has ever happened in the history of mankind with that though as your frame. As Roosh said, that thought alone will doom you to run leaky game.


  21. Even though I’ve been an avid reader of the Chateau for years, it still makes me smile every time Heartiste doles out legitimate advice to both fathers seeking to keep their daughters out of the arms of aloof badboys and to aloof badboys seeking to ratify their kingship by bedding those daughters. Viva la game! And oh what a game it is.


  22. (she’s easily a high 8, inherited the best feminine mix of traits from a Chinese mother & white father).

    How come the Asian is identified by nationality, but the white person is identified by race?

    I suspect this could be racism.

    The father may be saying “whiteness” has a quality all its own which trumps any nationality; therefore, I don’t need to identify my nationality.

    In addition, if the daughter brings home an Asian boyfriend and the father rejects him, should she suspect him of practicing racism?

    Especially if he is vague about the reason?


    • Recent immigrants get identified by their ethnic group, whereas since immigration from Europe pretty much stopped with World War I, we’re all mixed together now and called “white”.


    • It’s much easier to trace Chinese ancestry than white ancestry in America. How many white or black Americans do you know (besides genealogy buffs) who know their exact national ancestry? The longer your ancestors have been in the country, the more blood lines get blurred.


    • The more accurate way to say it would be “Han”, which is an ethnicity. Asians are as diverse a group as Europeans are, in terms of physical features. A Finn looks very different from an Italian; the Han Chinese look very different from the Thai. We get to lump all those of European descent into “white” here in the US because family ancestry may include a number of different nationalities.


      • White Americans are usually German, Irish, and English, with perhaps some Italian, Polish, Scandinavian, etc. thrown in. The vast majority of our ancestors came to the USA before 1914. Black Americans as an ethnic group are descended from slaves that were imported before the USA banned the importation of slaves, in 1808 I believe.

        The problem with “Han” is that it is also used to refer to Koreans. I guess the tones are different for Chinese “Han” and Korean “Han”.


      • White Americans might have some Dutch ancestry, also.


      • That’s the word my Chinese teacher always used to refer to herself, and a lot of the words use that character. But it wouldn’t surpirse me if there’s some overlap with Korea there.


      • cynthia
        . A Finn looks very different from an Italian;

        Morphology is one thing, but how do they both FUNCTION as white?


      • What are you talking about? We’re discussing white AMERICANS, who are mostly mutts. They’d be lucky to identify an Italian or Finnish ancestor, let alone an entire bloodline.


      • on October 23, 2012 at 8:47 pm gunslingergregi

        bla bla bla


      • Step 1 would be to be able to find Italy or Finland on a map. Which many Americans can’t. Far as I know, Germans are the no.1 single ethnic group in the US, followed by Italian, English and Russian, in approximately that order. Fair number of Poles and Swedes, too. For rather complicated reasons, many Americans claim Irish (or Scottish) heritage who are actually neither. While little tiny Ireland did indeed send a large PERCENTAGE of her population to North America, the TOTAL was pretty low compared to some of the much larger nations.


      • We Irish, while possibly outnumbered, simply outshine the rest of you Euro mongrels.


      • @Wolfie,

        Your knowledge/intuition on US ethnicities is faulty.

        The relevant ordering is:
        1. German
        2. Irish
        3. English

        Italians are down the list, as are Scottish, and Russians barely make the list at all. It seems like you live in some part of NYC that has a high level of Italians for you to make that comment – like Staten Island…

        It’s always amazing to me in NYC that people seem to think that Irish, Italians and Jews came to the US at the same time, in the 1890-1930 period. That is true for Italians and most Jews, but the Irish have been here since the beginning. There were Irish here in the 1600’s, a huge influx in the 1700’s and a still larger influx in the early 1800’s. What people like you don’t seem to understand is geometric growth. When the Irish hit the shores they got married early and had huge families for centuries.

        The fact that Ireland has a small population today and a low population density compared to Western Europe, says nothing of a few hundred years ago, when Ireland was one of the most densely populated regions of Europe – thanks to the lowly potato largely. Even when the most recent large influx of Ireland arrived during the 1840’s Potato Famine, the population was large compared to its neighbors and the US.
        US ~ 13 million
        UK ~ 12 million
        Ireland ~ 9 million

        Today there are upwards of 55 million people of Irish descent in the US, and 90 million of Irish descent worldwide and only 4.2 million in Ireland.

        Note: German does include people who emigrated from all German speaking lands, so often Austrians and Slavs consider themselves German is they spoke German on arrival.

        Note 2: After the devastation of the Cromwellian Wars and a subsequent famine in the 1670’s, Ireland’s population was reduced to about 650,000, yet had risen to 9 million by 1840 – that’s an increase of 1385% in just 170 years – that’s the extreme growth rate of the population, and it continued in the US at around that rate, till now. Just look at the Kennedy family for reference.- the Irish are Borg.


      • Oh and BTW, the English colonists in the US were not just very apprehensive about the various influxes of Irish, but were actively hostile. Of course they were entirely right to be, as here were a people (the Irish) whose men were far more Alpha than the English, with a more traditional religion that was hugely pro-natal. The English feared that they would be demographically overrun by the Irish and the whole nature of the highly conservative, puritan English spirit would be lost to the more laissez-faire, liberal Irish.

        They were totally correct, the Irish obliterated the puritans lifestyle wherever they went.


      • We Irish, while possibly outnumbered, simply outshine the rest of you Euro mongrels.

        Perhaps… but when I want a seven-course meal, that six-pack and a potato just won’t do. 😉


      • Yeah, I wonder what the Massachusetts Puritans would have thought were they to look through a time machine and see Boston overrun with micks. Even today, Ireland has a birth rate and population structure similar to Turkey.

        We got very few actual Russians; most immigrants from the Russian Empire were either Jews or Catholics (mainly Poles). Canada got some Ukrainians, but even they were Uniates from Austria-Hungary.


      • @Corvinus – I don’t know why you care what some Puritan thinks. On the positive side, they were dissidents from the British zeitgeist of the time. On the negative side, they were British, and therefore I do not need their license.

        I am biased of course (Celt), but even viewed dispassionately, America was literally built in no small part on the back of the Irish.

        The Irish were for a long time viewed as subhuman. We turned the tables on that view, and demonstrated our worth, and now hold a place at the American table, which we earned. No other ethnic group in the US has proved itself more, especially when one thinks of where we started, and where we are now. Perhaps the blacks in the US compare, in terms of their advancement. No one else.

        So crack some knuckles and get to work, if you are to justify your assessment of yerself, and how inferior yer Irish cuntrymen are.


      • Perhaps I should have mentioned that I am half-Irish and Catholic myself, and my last comment was served with a healthy dollop of irony. I agree, that the Irish were the only people the English really feared and had a strange visceral complex about. Not the French, nor the Spanish, nor even the Germans. It’s usually chalked up to their refusal to become Protestant, but given that French or Italians don’t get subject to the same sort of untermensch epithets, maybe the reason was biological.


      • @Corvinus – OK, consider yourself redeemed.


    • How come the Asian is identified by nationality, but the white person is identified by race?

      Merely a matter of one’s orientation.


      • @ That Guy – Staten Island? Not even close….. Anyway, those numbers cannot possibly be correct.If trhey are, absolutely everything I’ve ever read and heard about immigration to the US is wron, and I’m also completely blind in both eyes to the real world around me. 12% of the US population are all Black people lumped together, another 14% are all (self-described)’Hispanic’ people lumped together. 55 million Irish Americans would make them about 16%.Which would mean that Black + Hispanic + Irish would exceed 40% of the US population. That’s impossible. I seriously cannot see Ireland ever having had a population of 9 million, especially not before the Industrial Revolution, which is about when European population explosion happened. I’ll buy maybe 10-15 million Irish Americans(still a pretty impressive number), not including non-Irish people who changed their names (or had them changed) upon entry into the US to ‘fit in’. Or because their slave driver’s name was Irish. The German speaking Austrians were usually ethnic Germans, so were most of the German speaking people of eastern Europe, so lumping them together with the folks who came from the many small states that we know today as Germany is perfectly fine. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against Ireland – it’s a nice country and the people may be the friendliest in Europe – but even Australia, which probably received a higher percentage of Irish than any other former British colony only has a population of about 15 million today, and most of those aren’t Irish, either.


      • @Wolfie,

        Yes, it does appear that you are absolutely wrong!!!

        Scottish-Americans ~ 9 million
        Italian-Americans ~ 7 million

        Australia ~ 22 million people
        Irish-Australian ~ 10+ million (approx 45%)

        Scotland ~ 5 million
        Irish-Scots ~ 2.5+ million (approx 55%)

        England ~ 55 million
        Irish-English ~ 15+ million (approx 25%)

        BTW, if you like reading science papers, there is a very good one from July 2012 – “The geography of recent genetic ancestry across Europe” – here:

        And in you will see the somewhat surprising fact that any Englishman shares MORE ancestry with any Irishman, then another Englishman!

        BTW, many Scottish-Americans feel that the figures for Irish-Americans just can’t be right – like you do – but if you do a quick and dirty calculation, of relative populations of Scotland and Ireland, prior to their main emigrations to the US, you can see why the numbers are so lopsided:

        Early 1800’s
        Scotland ~ 1.5 million
        Ireland ~ 9 million

        So Ireland’s population was 6 times that of Scotland’s when much of the emigration to the US took place.

        Then today we have:
        Scottish-Americans ~ 9 million
        Irish-Americans ~ 55 million

        Again it’s almost exactly 6 times.


      • According to Wikipedia, we’re both wrong. They say there are 35 million Americans who CLAIM at least partially Irish heritage. Still a very impressive number. So while my estimate may be too conservative, yours must include Shaquille O’Neal and Bob Dylan…..;)


  23. The daughter here will have a couple of flings and trists in her teenage years, regardless of what you do to make these boys seem unappealing. It may be repellent to you but you can’t worry yourself sick about it. But if you present her with a positive male role model and she’s lucky enough to possess average executive functioning or better, I doubt she’s evolve into one of the playthings that circulate around the type of men here.

    Basically if she has a true alpha male in her life (you) she’ll be able to discern between the men who should be leading her and fathering her children from the low-status low-income mimesis who need pointers as to how to appear aloof in text messages.


  24. E-Mail #2

    If the girl is still into you, which your writing suggests she is, there is no easy way to break up with her with her. You just have to do it. But in doing it, you must walk the line between alpha and beta for one simple reason, you want to pull her into your rotation orbit after a suitable time. You want to get your complete freedom, but leave the door open for a future after that suitable time.

    Though it may sound opposite, I’ve found that this suitable time is decreased by the more you hurt her compared to her unrestrained love. Simply, the more you hurt her, the more readily she’ll want to get back with you after a short separation.


  25. Number one is dead on. My dad used to do this to every guy I ever brought home.

    You could also try to instill some morals in her, too. Just a thought.


  26. on October 23, 2012 at 8:13 pm Drinkosaurus Rex

    Threadjacking for a moment, with a question of my own… time being of the essence as I need to make a move very soon here.

    TLDR: It looks like my only reasonable course of action to land a 2nd date with a girl is to see her during DAYTIME before she goes to work a night shift. I am programmed for night game and dating, and am a bit unsure of how to proceed.

    I’m in my late 20s, and an American who now resides overseas in a different English-speaking country. My accent and expat status do me a lot of good, and in general my typical pattern has excelled in my new environment (night game leading to night dates, and night sex).

    I recently met a gorgeous girl (aged 23, a 8.5 or 9) who is the venue manager of a trendy local bar, as well as a full-time graduate student. So she works 3-4 nights a week at the bar (dinner until closing), attends school 4 days during the week, and has tons of homework. In all honesty, this is what I’d consider girlfriend material.

    I met her as my friends and I recently had a sold-out run of comedy shows at her bar. Every night I’d sit at the bar, she’d make me free drinks, and I’d get to drop DHV after DHV in conversation (we always sold out, had great shows, and had reporters/photographers in to interview me… occasionally I’d have to take a phone call while mid-conversation with her in order to do a local radio interview) and escalate light kino.

    I invited her to come back to the bar and watch our final show on her night off, and then go and get a drink with me. She loved the show, the date went well, and ended with a makeout and her saying she’d love to see me again.

    It’s now 2 weeks later, I haven’t been back to the bar as the show is over, and we haven’t gone out again. All of her texts (she is good about responding in a timely fashion) state that she would love to go out, but that her work/homework schedule won’t allow it until exams are over in a few weeks. After some teasing to make sure she wasn’t a flake, she suggested that either (a) I start coming into the bar to hang out and keep her company, or (b) we meet up during the day sometime before she has to go in for her shift.

    (a) Seems like a losing proposition. Too many coworkers, other customers hitting on her, and me getting drunk while she stays sober and responsible.

    (b) Seems like it could work, but I’m not sure what the best date or meetup suggestions are during daylight. My standard 2nd date would be drinks at a bar that is very close to my house. Drinks are pretty much out of the question in this case, and I don’t want to stray too far from my house/bedroom if there’s any hope of things heating up.



  27. If you provide her daughter with a truly alpha example and she is blessed with average or above executive functioning I doubt she’ll wind up being a cum dumpster for the type of men on here. A young woman who has a template for finding the type of man to lead her and father her children will be able to discern the truly alpha from the low-status low-income mimesis who need advice as to how to appear aloof in text messages or aspire to impregnate a variety of hood rats.


  28. on October 23, 2012 at 8:31 pm gunslingergregi

    You could also try to instill some morals in her, too. Just a thought.
    there ya go
    send her to see me i’ll take her around to see some of the most fucked up lives imaginable and she can see what happens to girls who fuck up it ain’t eggs in a skillet cooking


  29. on October 23, 2012 at 8:32 pm gunslingergregi

    or take her to the jail and have her talk to some bitches doing hard time


  30. on October 23, 2012 at 8:36 pm gunslingergregi

    if you want to put loot on a chicks books i’ll have one call collect from jail tell you about her life scare your kid straight he he he


  31. on October 23, 2012 at 8:38 pm gunslingergregi

    When I first met her I was a huge dick to her, buying everyone drinks except her, etc. She was really into me. ””””””’

    when did you try to kiss her and how did you not fuckclose?


  32. on October 23, 2012 at 8:41 pm gunslingergregi

    Proof that long term relationships domesticate a man until he is undesirable. Solution: Get yourself a mistress, men! ”””””””

    what every dude on the mailbag needed to do have another chick


  33. on October 23, 2012 at 8:46 pm gunslingergregi

    Boyfriend, I DO NOT want to have sex with you!
    this would actually make her want to have sex with you and exactly what you should say
    then tell her it is because she is boring the fuck out of you
    take her favorite piece of clothing and rub it all over a ho’s pussy
    buy some other chicks purses and shit and leave it in the house
    get some chicks hair and leave that in house
    have a chick call you
    full metal jacket addition lol


  34. on October 23, 2012 at 8:50 pm gunslingergregi

    oh wait trying to break up nicely nm


  35. “I have noticed that girls will try to drag their men through shitty hoods instead of taking safer routes. They test men’s protectiveness.”

    Only girls who don’t really love or care about their men. I already know my man is protective, I don’t need to put his health or life in danger to prove a stupid point.


    • on October 23, 2012 at 8:55 pm gunslingergregi

      but if you are in a shitty area and your chick breaks out a knife too ya know she is a keeper


      • Haha, I think you roll with some gangster chicks.


      • on October 23, 2012 at 9:02 pm gunslingergregi

        i’m rollin in hell need greg elliot to pray for me he he he


      • You need a harem of karate chopping gangster girls on your side, you’ve got devils chasing ya 🙂


      • on October 23, 2012 at 9:31 pm gunslingergregi

        only chicks who i know were down to the death for me was my wife and her mom and they aren’t gangsta more country.
        But yea the gangsta chicks are the devil chasing me lol but yea they all shed tears though i think i am addicted to the tears maybe have seen more in the last two months than a thousand normal lifetimes.
        drama and tears it can be addictive
        i got kids birth certificates in my truck now chick got evicted along with couple baby pictures some neighbor brought over other than that everything in the house was gone when we pulled up. Should of heard the crying on that one.
        now yea my chick did say if i would of got killed other night she would of killed them but ahh yea not sure on that one lol


      • on October 23, 2012 at 9:50 pm gunslingergregi

        i needed my ninja to save me but she is not responding anymore must of read this site (:


      • I’ve got a team of Baptist grammarians working on it, 24-7.


      • on October 25, 2012 at 6:14 am gunslingergregi

        it worked thank you


  36. on October 23, 2012 at 8:53 pm gunslingergregi

    back when i was an asshole and didn’t realize it i would just not see the chick again
    till i felt like using her
    never broke up never really thought about their feelings until onititis happened but even then still didn’t think about any type of morals involved in anything never promised anything


  37. Be the sort of man that when your daughter hits 19 and is looking down on the guys as if from Mount Olympus she says to you, “You know, Dad, it is hard for me to date because I cannot help but compare them to you.”
    See, it does not matter if it was just bullshit. Because a kid who can make unprompted BS at that level of expertise is going to be fine.


    • I was that girl. My dad is a great man. And when I met my man, he didn’t need to perform any of the “protective father” BS because it wasn’t necessary. He just looked him in the eye, shook his hand, and said “you know what you need to do.”

      If you find yourself having to clean shotguns and make silly threats at some punk across the dinner table, you’ve already lost. Your daughter should respect you too much to make you dine with fools.


      • Your daughter should respect you too much to make you dine with fools.

        Hypergamy doesn’t care.


      • In a completely non-pervy way, hypergamy does come into this. A girl’s father should be the man that all other men in her life are compared against. He should be the ultimate measure of what she can achieve in a man, and she should constantly be looking to find a mate that matches up to his example. He’s the first, and possibly only, man she’ll ever love fully and unconditionally. I feel lucky to have a dad like that. I’ll be lucky if I find a guy who’s half as good as he is.

        That being said, dad used to pull the shotgun routine on my male friends because it amused him.


      • I read a book called ‘Bad Boys – Why we love them and how to know when to leave them’ by a lady psychiatrist named Dr. Carole Lieberrman. in hder book, Dr. Lieberman uses archetypes from fairy tales and fantasy fiction to describe different (??) types of men women find irresistable. If even just a fraction of what she claims is actuallyu true, a woman’s mind is a black, bottomless abyss of horrors. No wonder they get headaches all the time. In a nutshell, she says that women want to be raped by their fathers, thusly stealing him away from mom. Good grief!


      • cynthia, you’ve made the mistake of assuming the typically embittered, reformed chump/psychological-mess of a beta that worships these sites has a father in the first place. Don’t underestimate the toll of the Divorce Generation. (I won’t link to it again, but just google “WSJ Divorce Generation.”)

        They have no frame of reference for a properly ordered pack dynamic, and they are certain that the sexual marketplace can be nothing other than “red in tooth and claw.” Every girl is an irredeemable slut from puberty on, end of story. And so forth.

        The enormity of hypergamy’s influence over our culture lately is a self-correcting phenomenon. Just because we were born in it doesn’t mean civilization can tolerate the pathogen for very long. Either we eradicate it, or it eradicates us. Keeping one’s issue “off the pole” is the once and future function of the father quafather. Dressing nine-year-olds like prostitots and letting the bitches run wild brings chaos, which brings destruction, which brings a great awakening, which brings rebirth. Or, we can skip the next several decades of suffering into wisdom and just start sending our daughters back to finishing school.

        You’re on a remarkable run of perceptive commentary lately. I look for your posts among the chaff of the comboxes.



      • If women were primarily rational, instead of primarily emotional, then I wouldn’t smile sardonically when you use phrases that start with “women should.”


  38. on October 23, 2012 at 9:01 pm gunslingergregi

    Study: The longer a woman is in a relationship, the more her sexual desire decreases. Men reported no such decrease.
    no decrease in desire but i’m pretty sure there was a decrease in the men desiring the chick they were with.


  39. If a chick asks you if you’ve met any chicks lately and you tell her that you have (because you have), how is that not a beneficial thing for you? Is that not demonstrating pre-selection? I’d only imagine the shiv striking the soft underbelly if his response was “no”

    (re: email #6, end of second para)


    • The chick was his oneitis, and it wouldn’t have done any good unless he was convincing about saying he was seeing other girls and enjoying it.


    • I like to answer “Just crazy bitches lol” That way she knows that 1) I’ve met other girls, 2) I have some standards, 3) if I’m hanging with her either I think she’s a crazy bitch too or I think she’s better than them, and 4) everyone knows crazy = hot so they must be decent looking chicks.


  40. She has to travel nowadays for her job. Fortunately that no longer means having to go thru customs or even to go (personally) shopping. For anything.
    She has been clubbing in places you would not believe – but always with 2 or more armed body-guards.
    There are countries in the middle east that would take any steps, any steps at all, to keep any sort of harm or annoyance from happening to 5ft 10in blondes from Certain Families in Houston -while they are passing thru.


  41. Seems like since birth I’ve been on a journey,
    A quest, a tireless, confusing expedition to define myself,
    To define that which makes me a man.
    Sounds ridiculous I know, but like many of my generation I’ve been fed so much bullshit,
    So many mixed messages about masculinity and manhood that I’ve sought answers,
    Answers from anywhere and everywhere which ultimately only led to more confusion.
    Answers from other men, from women (haha), from internet blogs and forums (still love the site)
    Does a man do this? Should a man do that? Answer: A man just does.
    He walks his own path, makes his own choices, sets his own goals, and goes after what he wants.
    So rudimentary and simplistic in theory and yet how many men actually do this?
    A man is alpha when he takes control of his life, makes a decision, and can say, “Here I am, you don’t like it, fuck you!”
    All this other shit is nonsense. Become better men and the rest will take care of itself.


    • Get a mentor. Your follow your bliss solipsistic nonsense amounts to nothing. The ways of men have been established by hundreds of generations before you. Your navel gazing has nothing on that cumulative project of knowledge.

      On the other hand, seeking independence is manly. But you are fooling yourself if you think you can independently seek independence, without first having benefited from centuries of your progenitors’ trial-and-error. Plato’s Guardians were ready to rule only after age 30. Up until then it is training training training. The lowest rung on the Roman Republic’s cursus honorum (course of offices) was Quaestor, and the minimum age for that position was 30. Only after proper seasoning does one have the capacity to be free.

      It is ordained in the external constitution of things, that men of intemperate minds cannot be free. Their passions forge their fetters. (Burke)

      Or “Confirm thy soul in self control / And liberty in law.”

      In other words, it requires patience and acquisition of skill to achieve independence. Pace Rousseau, we are not “born free but [are] everywhere in chains.” We are born stupid, instinctive, selfish, undisciplined, unkempt, weak, and enslaved to ourselves. It takes decades of refinement to make a man in full.



      • “Get a mentor.”

        Once again, you get it wrong.

        Does a man do this? Should a man do that? Answer: A man just does.
        He walks his own path, makes his own choices, sets his own goals, and goes after what he wants.
        So rudimentary and simplistic in theory and yet how many men actually do this?
        A man is alpha when he takes control of his life, makes a decision, and can say, “Here I am, you don’t like it, fuck you!”
        All this other shit is nonsense. Become better men and the rest will take care of itself.

        So says Anonymous, and he’s exactly right.

        Sorry, Matt. A classical education is not necessary to be a man. Nor is age. If you have any doubts about that, ask the eighteen and nineteen year olds who stormed Iwo Jima, or who held the line in the Bulge.


  42. on October 23, 2012 at 9:52 pm gunslingergregi

    Does a man do this? Should a man do that? Answer: A man just does.
    He walks his own path, makes his own choices, sets his own goals, and goes after what he wants.
    So rudimentary and simplistic in theory and yet how many men actually do this?
    we are doing it now bro


  43. on October 23, 2012 at 10:01 pm gunslingergregi

    ,” Up to a point a man’s life is shaped by environment, heredity, and movements and changes in the world about him; then there comes a time when it is within his grasp to shape the clay of his life into the sort of thing he wishes to be. Only the weak blame parents, their race, their times, lack of good fortune, or the quirks of fate. Everyone has it in his power to say, this I am today, that I shall be tomorrow. The wish however must be implemented by deeds.”

    Sydney J. Harris
    Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.

    The deepest craving of human nature is the need to be appreciated.
    William James

    why you should not cook nor do dishes

    ””””””””In a word, neither death, nor exile, nor pain, nor anything of this kind is the real cause of our doing or not doing any action, but our inward opinions and principles.

    He walks his own path, makes his own choices, sets his own goals, and goes after what he wants”””””’
    kind of true the above so we are kind of doing what we do cause we want to

    For inner happiness to be realized we must first take care of all our outer happiness’s one by one, only then we will be able to reach there where inner happiness resides.


  44. Hippies stacked into a pile burn OK but not nearly as well as Mesquite logs. Or even as well as a big stack of your incontininent emotions after being doused with kerosene and napalm.


  45. Off topic, but lulz:
    “‘WHITE PEOPLE ARE LESS LIKELY TO BE GAY: Poll reveals African-American community has highest percentage of ‘LGBT’ adults in U.S.
    Gallup survey, based on interviews with more than 121,000 people, showed that 3.4% of U.S. adults were lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender (LGBT)
    Highest proportion in black community, at 4.6%, followed by Asians (4.3%), Hispanics (4%) and Caucasians (3.2%)
    Poll found 44% of LGBT adults were Democratic, and 13% Republican”

    Lower group SMV = more instances of homococking to release pent up seminalz’ yo


    • But wait, isn’t 10% of the population gay?

      Pretty lies perish.



    • From all the invective hurled at white men by nonwhite men, one would think we were all limp-wrists. Although, given that white people seem to favor fag marriage more than blacks and Hispanics do, maybe it’s only natural I was surprised. We certainly have a higher betatude rate than NAMs.


    • There should be as much homo-queer bashng on this blog as negro bashing.

      Tired of faggot culture, faggot movies, faggot fashion, and faggots everywhere.


    • Hmm, and I thought it was the blacks and Hispanics that were the most prejudiced against gays.


      • Maybe they are postjudiced?


      • Familiarity breeds contempt… when you see certain unsound behaviors firsthand… and often… ‘prejudice’ happens..

        As Wolfie65 points out, it’s actually ‘postjudice’… the alleged “prejudging” is just another example of leftspeak success at grabbing the offensive in the West’s verbal/moral warfare.


      • There’s that, I suppose.

        In the Obama/Hillary contest, white Democrats who lived in all-white areas voted for Obama, whereas those who voted in heavily black areas supported Hillary. The wikipedia article about the 2008 dumbocrat contast has a hilarious three-layer structure, with a sandwich of somewhat black Hillary states between heavily white Obama states and heavily black Obama states (in the South, where blacks are a majority of Democrats)


      • Blacks are generally anti-Gay Marriage. The Rs pressed 0bama for a view on this, and did so rightly, knowing that when he came out “for” Gay Marriage, it would collapse his black support. Well played.

        Also, there is the possibility that the American black community has figured out that 0bama is On The Down Low, and the black folks don’t want a cake boy as their leader/representin’.

        Will be interesting to see what happens in November.


      • Heck, not only is he a cake boy, he isn’t even an actual black American.


      • He must be exorcized.

        But will this change things? He is merely a symptom of the disease.


    • This makes a lot of sense. Given that homophobia is more likely to occur the more (male) children a woman has, if you have a massive babymama epidemic then lots of those children will be gay. More white people have more reasonable litters so less gayness all around.


  46. reader number 1 is talking about this :


  47. check 2:36


  48. LOL @ this deluded cunt. First comment of this article:

    “Also, it omits the observation psychologists have had for years that (a) the patriarchal competition between men makes it difficult for men to be friends with each other in a personal way, and so they seek this type of recognition and support from women but (b) the low status of women in patriarchy means men don’t want to reciprocate this from women (they just want to use the women for support).

    This is one reason that men actually value marriage more than women, but then tend not to see the marriage as a reciprocal enterprise. Viola, a high divorce rate.”

    Men are stuck in LJBF with girls because males can’t really be friends with each other LMAOOOO.


    • And men are responsible for the high divorce rate because marriage is more ‘valuable’ to us than to women, but we don’t ‘reciprocate’, i.e., hold up our end of the bargain.



  49. OT

    “met a bad bitch last night in the D
    Let me tell you how I made her leave with me
    Conversation and Hennessey”


  50. Help me out. Hooked up with this girl at a party (she was really into it). We go to school together and she hasn’t looked at me or said a word to me since. whats up with that


  51. what is a bring the movies girl


  52. Louis CK is using the term “sexual market value” on his current tour. You are influencing American culture more than you know and nobody gives you any credit.


  53. reader #6 needs to familiarize himself with the freeze out. it’s gold in a situation like his.


  54. For #4 this guy sounds like he over-played his hand too early.

    I used to do this and it would be 50/50. I think a better read of the situation would have been better. The whole lie about the date of the homecoming should have been a clue to bail and game again later.

    The fact is that in some cases not all situations are salvageable and not all girls are gameable at any given point in time.

    There is one girl in my social circle I have found stunning. About 4 months ago she gave me IOI’s and we danced, someone took our photo.

    I didnt’ see her for a few months after that. Then I mentioned the photo and she added me on Facebook.

    Again, didn’t see her for about 3 weeks and saw her at a party and she gave me more IOI’s. I use other women to build pre-selection game, keep conversations short and light. As she warms, then i up my game.

    By contrast, another girl I met and gamed from a website turned out to be a 7…cute, and is now up for anything in bed.

    So you have to get better at reading situations, too much too soon or too little too late. It has to be the right amount at the right time.


  55. good way to break up without having to-> come quick ..kiss them on the cheek after …say “that was great thanks” ..assume the beta cuddle position and be asleep in 3 minutes.. will work with all but the very weak and desperate.. if you want it to be a little harsher ..forget the cuddle..just rollover after the thank you -> you have to be pretty secure in yourself and not worry what she make think or tell others.. saves huge on drama .. and will help you realise if you are not producing some sort off payoff for ‘MOST” women.. the I love you’s, the attention and special ways she treats you are only maintenance.. you are loved the way a farmer loves his cows..


  56. on October 24, 2012 at 9:41 am Craig from Belvidere

    A study from Scientific American whichproves yet again that The Chateau is brilliant and ahead of its time: “Men and Women Can’t Be ‘Just Friends'” at


    • The first comment of that article pisses me off so much. What a deluded cunt.


    • Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa.

      My, what passes for “science” these days!

      “You mean just because a woman is pretty you want to sleep with her?”

      “Naw, we pretty much want to nail the ugly ones, too.”


  57. on October 24, 2012 at 5:17 pm The unfortunate one

    I had similar problem to reader 6, just not so overblown. I did spend just one night so with the girl, our first night… (BTW; we live far apart). Before inviting me through my self-induced invitation to her apartment (we were on some kind of conference), she repeated several times: no sex, no sex etc, talking some serious stuff (a feminist). After some making out, kisses we landed in bed. We were supposed anyway, such was an agreement: sleeping together without sex. I tried clumsily to direct my hand down and up, but she always stopped it, and in time.Together with her words, like ‘If you give me time, everything will be ok’. Previously called her nose witch-like which suddenly made her lost her mood. Started to apologize like a good beta then. Then, as I was very tired that day (slept previously just 5 hours), I suddenly lost my short hard-on and decided to withdraw into the pillows, facing this failure of important organ. What to do then in case of failure and tiredness, and certain bodily stifnness of her which slowed me down…?


  58. There is another option for the father. He can bring the young men after his daughter into his sphere. It is the natural move of the alpha paterfamilias.

    The idea is sent-up in Meet the Parents where Jack Byrnes describes his “circle of trust.” (Our degenerate culture is so baffled by the idea that they can only make fun of it. Take away the satire, and Byrnes is an excellent portrayal of an alpha father.)

    Alpha is a means to an end on sites like these, so its readers overlook the obvious. The solution is to alpha the suitors up. Our daughters are not consigned to an endless sexual war of all against all, even if some bitter apocalyptics have personally resigned to this fate. Alphas bring unity to chaos and order to a divisive pack. Lone wolves pick off the broken, the runts, and the strays — and PUAs have notoriously confused alphas rightly understood with sexual drifters and scavengers.

    A father befriends and guides a rough young alpha-in-training to make him worthy of his offspring. He treats him like a son-in-law from the first. He doesn’t fear suitors, nor is his house threatened by them. That’s because he banishes skeezy shitbags by reputation alone. Or if the particularly obstinate greaser fails to get the memo, waving the gun works too. On the other hand, when a boy demonstrates the nerve to fight him for his daughter, he is showing potential to be groomed into alpha.

    Millennial quasi-feminist liberals will snicker and claim that “the reality” of her sexual drive will always override her father’s command. This is the conclusion of a generation of boys abandoned by deadbeat dads. A father’s protest against his daughter’s choice of male company does not make the boy more attractive or an outlet for her rebellion. This is a myth promulgated by weak beta sperm-donors who haven’t the first clue how to control their children’s burgeoning hypergamy, much less understand such management as a chief responsibility of a man. Yes, some spunky girl might get her kicks by secretly messing around with someone her father hates — just as she might get her tongue pierced — but this is a reaction against beta bitchery masquerading as command.

    A man in control of his family never has to resort to, “Because I said so!” His disapproval is synonymous with dread, and it is communicated with a glance. A girl raised right has no lingering resentments at her father because he is admirable, not filled with AFC weakness. He has never given her a reason to flee the domesticated comfort he provides. On the contrary, she is dependent on the approval of her protector-from-birth, her archetype of manhood, and she cannot fathom navigating the big bad world without a sure hand guiding her decisions.

    Marriages in old Rome were conducted for the paterfamilias’ convenience and advantage. The daughter understood that disrespecting the family’s name with a loose cunt and no discretion was not just unwise but possibly deadly. This is daddy dread game. It works. But latch-key kids of divorce lack a frame of reference.

    A preponderance of chumpdom leads fatherless man-boys to proxy-teaching sites like these. For them, finding the daughter of a real, live alpha mentor brings with it an advantage many young herbs are already desperately seeking in a culture of feminine/faggot/beta role models. A kid can’t help if he was born into a peasant family, but it is a young man’s great fortune to marry up into alpha nobility.



    • You just described my father.

      But you underestimate the power of anti-male media and libtard school education when it comes to undermining male authority. I had a perfect alpha pater familias right in front of my eyes, but I hated him before finding this place and discovering that much of what he was doing was exactly what had to be done. My sisters admire him and got married as virgins. Actually I had to read this blog and read your comments in particular to understand why my sisters look at him that way and really respect him, while beta dads get treated like shit by their teen-whore daughters.

      I foolishly rebelled against him, because I was a brainwashed clueless idiot and now we have a recovering relationship, but I’m glad that I can now follow his lead. Thanks to you in particular.


      • +10


      • I’m not underestimating the challenge. As a culture we are corrupt to the core. But you may be underestimating the restorative ability of the generations: “the power of anti-male media and libtard school education” is sterile and moribund. They are dying and we are rising. Drunk sluts who awaken to their biological clock after it’s too late cannot make a future. We can, we are, and we will.



    • Well said.


    • Does anyone else wonder what kind of world King A lives in?

      His advice wouldn’t have worked in Republican Rome. And it certainly won’t work today.

      Follow it at your peril.


    • And who gives a damn how and why marriages were arranged in ancient Rome?


  59. Chateau

    Full Metal Jacket and Blade Runner are my two favourite movies of all time and obviously are the two at the top of my girlfriend’s most hated list. The recent bastardised quotes have made my day.

    In a moment of totally uncharacteristic obsequiousness I’m going to allow myself to say that not only those, but your own wholly original works and turns of phrase have me splitting my sides during my most productive work days sneaking glimpses out over the monitor onto glittering Sydney Harbour from my office.

    I may even give you a reach-around and some cash for being so damn’ heroic to we men in this support group.


  60. This will work, but you sure won’t feel like you left with the upper hand. My suggestion, if you want to dump her using less manipulative tactics while sparing her feelings as best you can, is to tell her that, although you love her in many ways, you never got over your ex-girlfriend, and you recently met her and fell in love again. For whatever reason, girls are more forgiving of rifts caused by the return of an old love you have nursed for years. It hits their romance buttons.


  61. I can’t help but wonder if the advice on this site pushes too hard for quick physical escalation. How women actually feel comfortable having sex on the second or third date? Most people aren’t that comfortable around strangers, and it seems like a small demographic that spends that much time at bars and clubs.

    The last girl I dated quit seeing me after I took her back to her place on the third date and started making moves.