The World’s First “Hot Chick With Douchebag”?

Pompeii_wall_painting

Peacocking head accessory? Check.
Overindulgent Roman guido (the original!) necklace? Check.
Cheeseball earrings? Check.
Hours in the gymnasium building neck muscles? Check.
Tunic unbuttoned down to navel to display sprouts of chest hair? Check.
Thousand yard stare of stupidity? Check.
Deep Mediterranean orange tan? Check.
Chick is a slut? Check.

Historical accuracy confirmed. The world’s first hot chick with douchebag!

(Link and association provided by commenters Lucifer and Ruby. Great JOOOORB guys.)





Comments


  1. first!

    Like


  2. Haha get that guy a bottle of Grey Goose.

    Like


  3. Though I gotta say, the hot chicks with douchebags website isn’t really that interesting to me. Those sorority chicks on there have this totally vapid, blank look to them. Their blank expressions convey the message cumguzzling is their raison d’etre… the only thing that adds any meaning to their lives. It’s unattractive. So it’s really douchebags with douchebags.

    Like


  4. No piercings, no tats, real boobies, nice bush down there… I would have liked Roman brothels.

    Like


  5. No piercings, no tats, real boobies, nice bush down there?

    Sounds kinda gay to me. 🙂

    Their blank expressions convey the message cumguzzling is their raison d’etre

    I’d imagine that years of ingesting alpha semen can leave them in mindless bliss. When they’re no longer able to secure said semen, I’d imagine an experience worse than any withdrawal from the most addictive drugs in the world.

    [editor: you have a way of nerdifying everything you reply to.]

    Like


  6. Guy is from a royal blood line? Check?

    Do you think Prince Rainier of Monaco would have landed Grace Kelly if he wasn’t, well, Prince Rainier of Monaco?


    Landing a guy with prestige and power is what every chick wants. Little girls dream out being princesses (i.e., married to a prince), not hooked up with a thug.

    Like


  7. [editor: you have a way of nerdifying everything you reply to.]

    Yes, I’m well aware of that. It’s a great way to scare off women stupid enough to find me attractive…

    And yes, my nephew calls me Urkel…

    [editor: ha! throw your nephew the roissy gang sign for me. he’s earned it.]

    Like


  8. [editor: ha! throw your nephew the roissy gang sign for me. he’s earned it.]

    I appreciate the attention given to my tomfoolery. Top notch responses on your part.

    Like


  9. Modern day hottie with douchebag.

    http://64.90.166.18/anne-hathaways-ex-arrested

    Peacocking stupid hair – check
    Overindulgent Roman guido – check (The Watch)
    Shirt unbuttoned to display sprouts of chest hair? Check.
    Thousand yard stare of superiority? Check
    Mediterranean orange tan? Close.
    Chick is a slut? Can’t tell she looks too wholesome

    Like


  10. Isn’t the attention whore throwing a White Person’s rendition of a gang sign also? All they are missing is the Billy Idol lip flex.

    Like


  11. on September 17, 2009 at 11:16 pm Virginia Gentleman

    aoefe,

    I’d rather gaze at Grace Kelly as opposed to the Hathaway ex, thanks. That being said, the female definition of “prince” must be somewhat more elastic than mine; it seems that a lot of otherwise acceptable women are interested not so much in a glass slipper from Prince Charming but rather Jimmy Choo from a thug.

    I hope I’m seeing a pattern that doesn’t exist. Note to self: Take over unimportant Pacific island and crown self king of same; stand contrapposto and profit.

    NB: What’s wrong with Follieri’s watch?

    Like


  12. “it seems that a lot of otherwise acceptable women are interested not so much in a glass slipper from Prince Charming but rather Jimmy Choo from a thug.”

    When girls get older, and the Prince on the white charger has not appeared on the driveway of their home in the subdivision, they settle. But they always keep the fairy tale fantasy buried in their unconscious. Put another way, if bloodline royalty, celebrity (nouveau royalty) or old money shows up they will drop the thug or whoever in a heartbeat.

    Females want security and attention. Being married to a royal prince is about as good as it gets. The elevation in social status makes them better than the other girls. They have something the other girls don’t have. Satiety complet.

    Like


  13. on September 17, 2009 at 11:28 pm ironrailsironweights

    No piercings, no tats, real boobies, nice bush down there… I would have liked Roman brothels.

    Christ Jesus, if time travel could only become reality (sigh).

    Peter

    Like


  14. I’ll bet she was pissed when she later realized he lied when he said this picture was painted “just for his personal use.”

    Like


  15. Virginia Gentleman I agree with Grace Kelly’s beauty over Hathaway but I was going for modern day girl with douche bag.

    The watch is the modern day equivalent to the necklace. (Truthfully I just needed something to match Roissy’s list).

    Like


  16. on September 17, 2009 at 11:42 pm Virginia Gentleman

    aoefe:
    Oh, I see that now. Had me worried for a minute there; I’ve been trying to pick out a decent watch of that sort for a while now. Alas, Breitling and TAG Heuer aren’t competitive as far as I’m concerned. Ditto Doxa and the Dirk Pitt watch, even if they were available.

    z:

    Put another way, if bloodline royalty, celebrity (nouveau royalty) or old money shows up they will drop the thug or whoever in a heartbeat.

    You don’t say. Perhaps I need to do more research into the family history. “Hey baby, I’m a prince! An honest-to-God prince, just like Lone Starr!”

    Question for the gallery: Can Mel Brooks movies be referenced without permanent shame, or is it a bright signal o’ beta?

    Like


  17. Virginia Gentleman a good watch is a very good accessory.

    I am NOT a fan of gold chains around the neck. Don’t go there.

    Like


  18. It is worthwhile to note that other contemporary couples were shown in a more positive light.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Pompeii-couple.jpg (Paquius Proculus and his wife)

    Like


  19. Jeesus, too funny. One of the non-gym membership owning D-bags. You woulda think he’d hit the gymnasium a little bit. As for the hot chick, I bet her BMI is way over 23…butter butt.

    Like


  20. on September 18, 2009 at 12:07 am The Fifth Horseman

    I never follow celebrity news. But today I learned something that greatly distressed me. Greatly.

    Pierce Brosnan, often a contender for ‘sexiest man alive’ and other such titles, in 2001, married Keely Shaye Smith.

    Pierce was 48, and Keely, at 38 was 10 years younger.

    When Keely was about 30, she was an exceptional beauty, earning a 9 or even a 9.5.

    Even at the time of marriage, she was still very hot. This was appropriate for an international superstar and 007 incumbent, who had done love scenes with an impressive array of top-tier beauties such as Halle Berry, Denise Richards, Teri Hatcher, Sophie Marceau, Famke Janssen, Michelle Yeoh, Renee Russo, etc.

    Keely at age 34.

    Keely at age 38, on her wedding day.

    But today, she has gained weight, and now looks like this..

    GACK!! Double GACK!!!

    In just about, say, 15 years, she fell from a 9.5 to a 3!!!!!

    Look at this side-by-side comparison, perhaps just 10 years apart.

    Isn’t this just the worst possible thing? This is PIERCE BROSNAN for god’s sake…..

    Maybe she has some health problem, and that is sad. I know of no other celebrity hottie who lets herself deteriorate like this, particularly while her husband is still a top star i.e. she has to be seen with him.

    Other hotties of the 90s who are the same age as Keely Shaye Smith (such as Cindy Crawford, Elle McPherson, and Kathy Ireland) still do a great job of looking as good as possible for their age.

    In fact, every single Bond Girl that Pierce did a scene with, still looks good.

    My god….. what a tragedy..

    Like


  21. ironrailsironweights,

    Greek and Roman women used to remove all pubic hair… sorry to disappoint you.

    Like


  22. If you think about it, this picture is so like a hookup after a toga party.

    Like


  23. on September 18, 2009 at 12:30 am Ferdinand Bardamu

    Roissy:

    “[editor: ha! throw your nephew the roissy gang sign for me. he’s earned it.]”

    What’s the Roissy gang sign? The shocker?

    Like


  24. What I am posting is just not going through

    Like


  25. Virginia Gentlemen:

    Let me recommend this watch:

    http://www.amazon.com/Seiko-Orange-Monster-Automatic-SKX781/dp/B000EPLR2G/ref=sr_1_20?ie=UTF8&s=watches&qid=1253249011&sr=1-20

    The Seiko Orange Monster. Amazon is quite reasonable, the watch looks great (it’s automatic, will need adjusting to proper time daily, but has it’s advantages chief among them about five years before needing service — every time you replace a battery you need expensive — around $40 — water-tight seals on a watch). I like automatics, but that is just me.

    If you do cooking, the timer bezel is great, lets you time one thing while a timer keeps track of another. Great for BBQ as well. This is my everyday watch.

    Day and Date too, great for that. Stainless steel won’t irritate your skin, I like it better than urethane bands.

    Like


  26. Simplified Version

    Guido: “Nice Tits They need a feel.”
    Annya “Go for it. Rome is falling. The walls are crumbling. Life is short. And fucking please don’t not cum inside.”

    Like


  27. Seiko? Shit, that’s not a watch. Get a Rolex, Patek, IWC, Cartier.

    I can confirm Keely Shaye Smith’s weight gain. A few years ago I sat next to Pierce, Keely, and family at Bubba Burgers in Hanalei on Kauai’s North Shore. She’s definitely a certified fat chick. Indeed her fatness almost made my choke on my burger. But Pierce himself is not that attractive either: incredibly bad skin, freckles, and wrinkles plastered his face. Then again, he’s Irish.

    Like


  28. OMG! What a picture comparison 5th Horseman! It’s true what they say “if you want to turn a fox into an elephant – you marry her!” * gasp! *

    On the other hand, aeofe, Anne Hathaway ex’s is so Beta that he faces life for a ‘thinking’ type of robbery – fraud and money laundering. Don’t Alphas who face life in prison do ‘manly’ robberies – violent, armed robberies?

    Like


  29. on September 18, 2009 at 2:31 am HUNGRY HUNGRY HIPPOS YO

    DA is actually a super secret pua who swoops mad bitches, works in porn for a living, and has a 10in member.

    Like


  30. OMG this is hilarious. Roissy, you are a comedic genius and a genius on human behavior.

    Like


  31. on September 18, 2009 at 3:13 am The Fifth Horseman

    Gil,

    I know. I never thought I would utter the following words :

    I am glad that I am NOT in Pierce Brosnan’s shoes.

    I mean, did any of us ever imagine that we would utter such words?

    She fell from a 9 to a 3 in just 10 years!!!!!!! She is in showbiz and has a better chance of staying pretty than most! Still!!!!

    Like


  32. forgive me if i missed this above – i scanned the comments, got bored and decided to post notwithstanding anything above

    this is so not a hot chick with a douche bag! i’m not an art history chick and i’m not a devout christian (ha) so i have no idea what this depicts. yet, from a human perspective, it’s quite far from roissy’s guess.

    i honestly think this is a brother and sister. look at their features! the same! and back in the day his cupping her breast could have indicated her femininity or fertility.

    i’m totally making shit up, but, seriously, don’t they look like brother and sister? wow.

    Like


  33. testing diameter of boob – check

    Like


  34. William, what is your avatar supposed to be?

    Where’s it from?

    Like


  35. there’s a roissy gang sign? and DA, of all people, gets to use it first?

    @aeofe – props on nailing the modern equivalent of that pic. anne hathaway’s ex. very funny!

    Like


  36. Whiskey, VA Gent,
    Personally, while I love the Rolex, I don’t think you need one in order to score with the ladies. As Aoefe said, garish displays of jewelry can actually turn a Woman off, much like a musclehead can turn lots of Women off.

    I’ve always been a fan of the Casio “G-Shock” watches, wore em for years. Got my first one way back as a highschool graduation present from my grandparents, and been down eversince. Tough, waterproof, you can get the bezel thingy Whiskey talked about, and they’re much cheaper than going in for an expensive piece like a Rolex or a Cartier, and its got that “action man” look. And trust me, it won’t make that much difference to the ladies. Its your overall Game that matters.

    You can get em at very nice prices at Amazon.com. I’m about to cop one or two myself in a minute.

    Holla

    O

    Like


  37. a man married with that whale cannot be James Bond anymore. With a wife with a BMI of 40, an actor can only play austin powers

    Like


  38. Fifth, damn that is harsh. You would think that she has all the time and money in the world to hire trainers and diet experts to help her get rid of all that flab.

    Like


  39. @ Dana

    “Ghetto 9 , the groid system? ”

    Funniest thing I read all week. Laughed so hard coffee came out my nose. Thanks.

    Like


  40. PA
    No piercings, no tats, real boobies, nice bush down there… I would have liked Roman brothels.

    If you look, you can see her piercings, and if you look, you WONT see bush. – dear Lucifer is right.

    The Romans also disapproved of pubic hair; young girls began removing it as soon as the first hair appeared. They used tweezers, which they called the “volsella” as well as a kind of depilatory cream called the “philotrum” or “dropax” which was sometimes made with bryonia and foreshadowed modern depilatory creams. Waxing with resin or pitch was also used to depilate. Furthermore, the practice of pubic hair removal wasn’t unique to Rome – it was practiced in even the most remote parts of the empire. Julius Caesar (101-44 BC) writes that, “The Britons shave every part of their body except their head and upper lip.” It is reported that Poppaea, wife of the Roman Emperor Nero, used depilatory creams to remove unwanted body hair daily. At that time, the latest available creams included some wonderful ingredients like resin, pitch, white vine or ivy gum extract, ass’ fat, she-goat’s gall, bat’s blood, and powdered viper. from – http://beavershaver.com/history_pubic_shaving.htm

    Like


  41. @Hungry Hippo – “DA is actually a super secret pua who swoops mad bitches, works in porn for a living, and has a 10in member.”

    This is true and I’m not kidding.

    Like


  42. This is a pubic service announcement.

    Daily Reader of Roissy aoefe is urging other readers and commenters to stay silent on the recent discovery of beavershave.com’s existance. News of this magnitude can severely affect the mental health of Peter and others like him. The choice is in your hands.

    Like


  43. The Romans also disapproved of pubic hair

    And then their civilization fell.

    Like


  44. Roman Festival Clothing Demonstrated in OP’s Picture = Ancient Ed Hardy Clothing?

    My God, it could be a conspiracy dating back ages…

    Like


  45. I’m fairly sure that the Germaninc barbarians liked their girls naturally thatched. This is why they won in the end. They enjoyed fcking more then the Romans did because they could feel the sweaty friction of grinding pubes, which is part of the fun.

    Like


  46. pubic hair is gross and unfeminine.

    the Germanic Barbarians won because they were the perfect immigrants. They added a surplus of females Because many men died fighting for and against the empire. So there was an excess of cute Germanic girls for the romans to bang and the highest ranking germans married noble Roman girls. So the Romans fucked themselves out of existence

    Like


  47. That is NOT a hot chick. She is a 4. Look at that turkey neck.

    Like


  48. I am not a fan of a wild GNP (though I prefer it to a baldie) but a nicely trimmed upside down triangle is hot. All R-rated nudity and pr0n pre-circa 1995 featured this kind of a look. The bald eagle is disturbing and ugly, like a snail without a shell or a collapsed cake.

    Like


  49. if you told a Roman around 450 AD : “your Empire is falling” he would answer “get away bitter beta, go away Davidus ALexandrus (or LUcifer)”

    Like


  50. Wow, really? A coach z reference?

    Like


  51. if you told a Roman around 450 AD : “your Empire is falling” he would answer “get away bitter beta, go away Davidus ALexandrus (or LUcifer)” – gig

    Inflation and the Fall of the Roman Empire

    The Roman empire was so prosperous because of their freedoms, stability and relative security. (That is if you were a Roman citizen and not a subjugated people.) That all changed in time though.

    The Roman state survived. The liberty of the Roman people did not. When freedom became possible in the West in the 5th century, with the barbarian invasions, people took advantage of the possibility of change. The peasantry had become totally alienated from the Roman state because they were no longer free. The business community likewise was no longer free. And the middle class of the cities was no longer free.

    In other words, the Roman state was the enemy; the barbarians were the liberators. And this undoubtedly was due to the inflation of the 3rd century. While the state had solved the monetary problem for its own constituents, it had failed to solve it for the masses. Rome continued to use an oppressive system of taxation in order to fill the coffers of the ruling bureaucrats and soldiers.

    The empire devolved to a state where military strongmen, alphas, dominated the commoners, betas, to point where the commoners cared little for the state. If the government was just a tool for those in power to extort those without why take up arms, risk your life, and fight? Let them be overrun.

    Like


  52. Pupu went to the Pompeii exhibit at the National Gallery last winter. In the middle of the third floor, there was a sculpture of two deeply intertwined figures, like those in Rodin’s Kiss. Walking around the sculpture, Pupu found a man and a tranny! The sculpture was originally located outdoor at the end of a swimming pool. Those Pompeians were surely kinky!

    Like


  53. Corrupt imperial Romans may have hated the GNP, but I refuse to believe that the virtuous (pre-Marius?) republicans did.

    Like


  54. Preferring baldness over lushness down there is a sign of imminent civilizational collapse. Because it signals a shift in men’s erotic practices from hot cock-in-vaj domination to effette mouth-to-vaj woman-worship.

    Like


  55. those who argue against baldness never had the pleasure to shave a girl before. once they prove it, they will understand the superior knowledge of Romans

    Like


  56. Mr. N

    inflation is associated with money the same way aging is associated with being born. Inflation at the Roman rates is absolutely natural

    Like


  57. The Roman Empire did not fall because too many Alphas took advantage of Betas. If anything, pre-Imperial (Republican) Rome was far more Alpha-heavy, where patricians dominated and dictators and novi homines carried the day.

    The Romans fell because they became too pampered and complacent, and let their once robust, martial culture be supplanted by sloth, excess, and, eventually, a compassionate and beta religion, Christianity. Once the Romans ran out of enemies and were free to wallow in the spoils of empire, they eventually became overrun with betas and provincials who were unable to support the bloated imperial bureaucracy and infrastructure.

    On another note, if you willingly buy yourself a Casio or Seiko and think it’s a “cool, affordable watch,” please just cut your arm off and call it a day. Don’t wear that bullshit.

    Like


  58. T-1000,
    I’ve worn Casio watches since highschool and hasn’t harmed my prospects w/Women not one bit.

    Your comments wrt the Roman history lesson though, was pretty good.

    O

    Like


  59. ALL watches are beta. An alpha doesn’t care what time it is. I’ll get there when I get there, and you’ll wait for me until I do, bitches.

    Like


  60. I’m not saying it will harm your prospects with women. Women are stupid and know nothing about watches, especially not the comparative virtues of different brands, movements, and the like. As long as it looks expensive, or, alternatively, rugged, she will likely be awed. Double points if it has a polished steel band so she can be mesmerized by the shiny, glinting metal.

    I just want us to make sure we do not compare Casios and Seikos to Rolexes and IWCs.

    Like


  61. No shit. Sluts and players have been around in High School. It’s biological.

    Like


  62. T-1000,
    Oh, OK, gotcha. No harm, no foul.

    Tarl, I think one can be Alpha AND on time. The two are not mutually exclusive.

    O

    Like


  63. [The Romans fell because they became too pampered and complacent, and let their once robust, martial culture be supplanted by sloth, excess, and, eventually, a compassionate and beta religion, Christianity. Once the Romans ran out of enemies and were free to wallow in the spoils of empire, they eventually became overrun with betas and provincials who were unable to support the bloated imperial bureaucracy and infrastructure.] – T-1000

    The Romans were pampered and complacent from the beginning. How else could Augustus seize control from the Senate and still be hailed as the savior of the republic?

    The bloated imperial bureaucracy was first and foremost to keep Caesar rich and powerful.

    The first threat to a king is invaders. To prevent against invaders a ruler must maintain an army.

    The second threat to a king is the army itself, the generals greedy and prideful may wish to become ceasars themselves. In order to keep the army happy pay them well.

    The third threat to a Ceasar is the people. The peons who pay the taxes and wages of Ceasar must be convinced they are doing so out of their best interest, or at least it is preferable to pay tribute than to suffer the consequences (normally execution.) They can either flee the land or rebel against the emperor. The government sought to satiate the public with works projects and entertainment. This created a need for more taxes, more tax men, a larger bureaucracy, and and more soldiers to enforce the edicts of the tax men. With more soldiers there must be more taxes, and the cycle progresses.

    All three have been a threat to Ceasar.

    Hannibal invaded on behalf of Carthage through the Alps from Spain. Caesars were regularly killed by their own soldiers, see Macrinus who was murdered after 14 months in office. And for the threat from the commoners was real enough, see the Third Serville War lead by Sparticus.

    Alphas fighting to exhaustion is what took the empire apart. At the end the army could take it no longer, there were few Romans left in the army, it was populated by Huns, Goths, Visigoths, and the like. The people could take it no longer, the progressively increasing taxation, bureaucracy, and rules left the people powerless and hopeless. The invaders were relief. The army who were not ethnic Romans didn’t care, the commanders wanted the emperor to fall so they could be emperor.

    Ultimately all three did in the western empire.

    Like


  64. For you fans of the chattering classes and what they are getting all excited about this week:

    *************

    According to study after study, women are becoming more and more unhappy. This drop in happiness is found in women across the social and economic landscape. It doesn’t matter what their marital status is, how much money they make, whether or not they have children, their ethnic background, or the country they live in.

    [Katto: Unsurprisingly, Huffington, a typical ‘indifferently-rational’ female, overlooks the following, from the very article she’s quoting: “The one and only exception: African-American women are now slightly happier than they were back in 1972, although they remain less happy than African American men.”]

    And it’s not because of the multitude of crises we are facing. Women’s happiness has been on a downward trend since the early 1970s, when the General Social Survey, a landmark study, began examining the social attitudes of women and men — who, by the way, have gotten progressively happier over the years.

    ….these trends are not caused by women working longer hours than men. We know this because women don’t work more hours than men. In a mammoth study of twenty-five countries, ranging from the U.S. to France to Slovenia to Madagascar, men and women were asked to keep track of what they were doing at various times during the day, and then the hours for each activity were calculated. The results: in developed countries, men average 5.2 hours of paid work a day, and 2.7 hours of homework, for a total of 7.9 hours a day; and women average 3.4 hours of paid work, and 4.5 hours of homework, for a total of, yes, 7.9 hours a day. These averages are statistically identical in virtually every developed country in the study: women and men work the same number of total hours in a day. (It is only in less developed countries such as South Africa or Benin, where women have fewer choices and are largely excluded from the workplace, that women actually work more hours per day than men.)

    [Katto: I wonder if women in such countries are happier than women in developed countries who have more rights and freedoms and so forth? Don’t hold your breath for the answer.]

    **********

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/marcus-buckingham/whats-happening-to-womens_b_289511.html

    Like


  65. Fans of the chattering classes and what’s getting them all in a tizzy lately, look no further for entertainment!

    WOMEN BECOMING INCREASINGLY UNHAPPY SINCE EARLY 1970’S

    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/arianna-huffington/the-sad-shocking-truth-ab_b_290021.html

    Some teasers:

    “Women’s happiness has been on a downward trend since the early 1970s, when the General Social Survey, a landmark study, began examining the social attitudes of women and men — who, by the way, have gotten progressively happier over the years.”

    Dear little old Arianna is very, ahem, excited about the youngish man who has stepped up to save women from all this misery that their liberation has brought:

    “It’s a question we’ll be exploring in depth on HuffPost in the coming weeks, in a series of blog posts by bestselling author and lecturer Marcus Buckingham. Drawing on his years as a senior researcher at Gallup, Marcus has developed a far-ranging expertise on what all of us — but especially women — can do to live richer, more purposeful, and, yes, happier lives.”

    Buckingham is a Tony Robbins type, you know, motivational speaker, audience composed exclusively of women and beta males, but like the clever salesman he is, he’s drawn on some reputable sociological data in order to sell his snake oil. Follow the link and have fun.

    Like


  66. The roman empire fell apart when it gave it’s own people a worser deal (high taxes, poor administration, bad laws) than invading barbarians. A system which does not offer the majority any positive rewards for cooperation will fail, always!

    Like


  67. on September 18, 2009 at 2:10 pm too late for romance

    Regarding watches, if you want a high quality watch that no one around you will have then check out Limes.

    They’re a German company that makes simple, elegant automatics. Every time I take mine in to get serviced it draws complements from the watch technicians regarding the design and build quality.

    Unfortunately these days even brands like IWC are oversold and common. Get something different. And if you check eBay and high-quality pawn shops in financial districts you can pick up a deal these days.

    http://www.limes-uhren.de/index_EN.php

    Like


  68. The Romans were pampered and complacent from the beginning. How else could Augustus seize control from the Senate and still be hailed as the savior of the republic?

    This is a bad argument. To the Romans ‘The Republic’ to the average Plebeian and many Patricians was a religious ideal; the actual methodology of administering it wasn’t particularly relevant. Compare Rousseau’s concept of ‘Sovereign’ within a State. It refers to a very ephemeral current of thought held by the public and not the government or ruler

    The foundations of the Republic were superstitious proto-Nationalism. Various Ceasar’s were able to save ‘The Republic’ because the Senate had lost the mission in the people’s eyes. Voting didn’t really matter, as observing a vote by the counters was nothing more empirical than Augers watching the migration of birds to come to a decision. It was a religious observance. The Senate no longer had sovereignty (in the terminology of Rousseau) and Augustus did.

    Similar social currents were in play in Nazi Germany, and are present in philosophical Romanticism and Idealism at play there. Hitler was the savior of Germany despite being a tyrant. The Weimar Republic, Parliament, et cetera, were largely irrelevant to the popular conception of what constituted ‘Germany’ at that time. The Roman’s conception of ‘Republic’ wasn’t specifically an ideological or philosophical reverence or respect for a literally republican form of government like exists in many modern democracies, but rather the reverence for ‘The Republic’ as if it were a Monarch or Church.

    The Caesar’s still made a habit of stamping SPQR on public property, as they were at that point the voice and will of the Senate and people of Rome regardless of the actual existence of a functioning Senate or not.

    Like


  69. I like this watch by Skagen: http://www.skagen.com/item/233LTMN.fx

    Like


  70. Roissy, kill the fucking watch spam already!

    The Romans were pampered and complacent from the beginning. How else could Augustus seize control from the Senate and still be hailed as the savior of the republic?

    Um, the Romans didn’t just sit there on their couches eating larks tongues in aspic and let it happen. There was the small matter of the Civil War… hundreds of ships duking it out at Actium, 60 legions under Octavian’s command, etc.

    Like


  71. kanye parodies from that taylor swift interruption.
    the funnies.



    Like


  72. I’ve always been a fan of the Casio “G-Shock” watches, wore em for years. Got my first one way back as a highschool graduation present from my grandparents, and been down eversince. Tough, waterproof, you can get the bezel thingy Whiskey talked about, and they’re much cheaper than going in for an expensive piece like a Rolex or a Cartier, and its got that “action man” look.

    The best watch for the rugged, action man look, with an instantly recognizable “brand name” attached, which does matter in this sort of area, is the original Navy Seal divers watch (with nylon velco watch band to make the look and action fuctionality complete):

    http://www.amazon.com/Luminox-Mens-Original-Watch-3903/dp/B000F1MKJI/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&s=watches&qid=1253300037&sr=1-4

    And yeah, it actually is good as a diving watch to depths way lower than normal diving.

    Like


  73. Another day, another false rape charge where a woman has no risk for destroying the lives of men.

    Obviously that has been big news here, but some of you may be surprised (pleased) to hear that this morning on WNYC individuals calling in, including women, were denouncing the woman and some even, gasp!, suggested that she be punished. Few defended her.

    (wnyc = npr + NY public radio = SWPL matchmaking events (I do not kid – they sell out quickly.))

    Like


  74. As Roissy has noted many times before, the sex robots are coming.

    David Alexander shall find his salvation.

    “I think the sex robot will happen fairly soon”

    Like


  75. From the article I just linked to:

    “I think the sex robot will happen fairly soon because the bottom is dropping out of the adult entertainment market, because there’s so much sex available for nothing on the internet,” says Levy. “I think the market was worth something like $12bn a year, and they aren’t going to want to lose all their income, and this seems to me an obvious direction to go. The market must be vast, if you think of the number of vibrators that sell to women. I’m sure a male sex doll with a vibrating penis will sell better than sex dolls today. I’ll be surprised if it’s more than another three years or so before we see more advanced sex dolls with more electronics and electromechanics.

    “There will be a huge amount of publicity when products like this hit the market. As soon as the media starts writing about ‘My fantastic weekend with a sex doll’, it will be like the iPhone all over again, but the queues will be longer.

    “I am firmly convinced there will be a huge demand from people who have a void in their lives because they have no one to love, and no one who loves them. The world will be a much happier place because all those people who are now miserable will suddenly have someone. I think that will be a terrific service to mankind.”

    David Alexander, get in line.

    Like


  76. al rallied:

    WNYC individuals calling in, including women, were denouncing the woman and some even, gasp!, suggested that she be punished. Few defended her.

    crystalline repercussions such as this indicate the Men’s Liberation Movement has perhaps, kinda, sorta maybe succeeded

    Go Men!

    Like


  77. K, I acquiesce your point that the prior reference to Augustus’ hailing as savior of the republic is in error.

    Tarl, The source I cite also reinforces your point that the Romans weren’t lazy in the beginning.

    I hold the rest of my argument stands that the confluence of the three threats to Ceasar, invaders, the military, and the people finally colluded to destroy it.

    Even if the Romans weren’t weak, pampered and lazy to begin with they were certainly so by the 200s. As my evidence I cite the Satires of Juvenal.

    You may argue the satires were exaggerated or Juvenal had a political agenda, maybe, but they were still representative of the thoughts of many.

    (I apologize for the length of the quote. Juvenal’s language is at times flowery.)


    [69…It is to their crimes that men owe their pleasure-grounds and palaces, their fine tables and old silver goblets with goats standing out in relief. Who can get sleep for thinking of a money-loving daughter-in-law seduced, of brides that have lost their virtue, or of adulterers not out of their ‘teens?…

    …For when was Vice more rampant? When did the maw of Avarice gape wider? When was gambling so reckless? Men come not now with purses to the hazard of the gaming table, but with a treasure-chest beside them. What battles will you there see waged with a cashier for armour-bearer! Is it a simple form of madness to lose a hundred thousand sesterces, and not have a shirt to give to a shivering slave? Which of our grandfathers built such numbers of villas, or dined by himself off seven courses? Look now at the meagre dole set down upon the threshold for a toga-clad mob to scramble for! Yet the patron first peers into your face, fearing that you may be claiming under someone else’s name: once recognised, you will get your share. He then bids the crier call up the Trojan-blooded nobles—for they too besiege the door as well as we: “The Praetor first,” says he, “and after him the Tribune.” “But I was here first,” says a freedman who stops the way; “why should I be afraid, or hesitate to keep my place?

    For no deity is held in such reverence amongst us as Wealth; though as yet, O baneful money, thou hast no temple of thine own; not yet have we reared altars to Money in like manner as we worship Peace and Honour, Victory and Virtue, or that Concord[31] that clatters when we salute her nest.

    117 If then the great officers of state reckon up at the end of the year how much the dole brings in, how much it adds to their income, what shall we dependants do who, out of the self same dole, have to find ourselves in coats and shoes, in bread and smoke at home?

    127 The day itself is marked out by a fine round of business. First comes the dole; then the courts, and Apollo[32] learned in the law, and those triumphal statues among which some Egyptian Arabarch[33] or other has dared to set up his titles; against whose statue more than one kind of nuisance may be committed! Wearied and hopeless, the old clients leave the door, though the last hope that a man relinquishes is that of a dinner; the poor wretches must buy their cabbage and their fuel. Meanwhile their lordly patron will be devouring the choicest products of wood and sea, lying alone upon an empty couch; yes, at a single meal from their many fine large and antique tables they devour whole fortunes. Ere long no parasites will be left! Who can bear to see luxury so mean? What a huge gullet to have a whole boar—an animal created for conviviality—served up to it! But you will soon pay for it, my friend, when you take off your clothes, and with distended stomach carry your peacock into the bath undigested! Hence a sudden death, and an intestate old age; the new and merry tale runs the round of every dinner-table, and the corpse is carried forth to burial amid the cheers of enraged friends!

    For as every tree nowadays has to pay toll to the people, the Muses have been ejected, and the wood has to go a-begging.

    21 Here spoke Umbricius:- “Since there is no room,” quoth he, “for honest callings in this city, no reward for labour; since my means are less to-day than they were yesterday, and to-morrow will rub off something from the little that is left, I purpose to go to the place where Daedalus put off his weary wings while my white hairs are recent, while my old age is erect and fresh, while Lachesis has something left to spin, and I can support myself on my own feet without slipping a staff beneath my hand. Farewell my country!]

    Like


  78. Obsidian, Whiskey, VA Gent:

    While the Rolex, IWC, Patek, Vacheron, et al. are great (I’m a big fan of the Patek Calatrava – 39 mm case – not gaudy), take a look at RGM Watches in Lancaster, PA. He’s recently started the 1st US made movement in something like 40 years. They aren’t gaudy either. Also take a look at Kobold & Bozeman Watch Co. All US made. Bozeman does several COSC Certified movements. Just some new things to look at…

    Like


  79. Much of Rome is in America,
    especially its decline
    A little Juvenal, a little Propertius
    It all falls into line

    Like


  80. “Seiko? Shit, that’s not a watch. Get a Rolex, Patek, IWC, Cartier.”

    Fancy watches are mainly for high-end salesmen who wear suits, and secondarily for the handful of men who are actually into fashion for its own sake and like watches (these guys usually own a half dozen different watches, dress up all the time, and are on a first name basis with the guy in Italy or England who makes their suits).

    I wore a stainless steel Tag when I wore suits every day, and I hated having to take it off every time I washed my hands (it was waterproof, of course, but if I didn’t take it off my wrist would stay wet). I also hated the way the bottom of the watch scratched against my laptop when I used it. The last time I wore that watch was at someone’s wedding a couple of years ago. The battery had died a couple of years before that. I never bothered to get it replaced. It’s just a stupid man-bracelet really. Your cell phone will tell you what time it is.

    And, btw: if you’re going to wear a man-bracelet, a Seiko is fine. Why break the bank when it looks just as good as a Breitling or a Tag? A good friend of mine got a Seiko when I got my Tag. His father bought them both for us when he was traveling on business in the Middle East, so we saved a bunch on import duties. My friend met and married the woman he loves wearing that watch. A couple of years later, she bought him a fancier watch, a Tag or a Breitling, I forget which.

    A second btw: when I was the director of business development (aka, the sales guy) for a venture-backed start-up, I wore my Tag to my our first meeting with the company’s first VC investor. You know what the VC wore? A Swiss Army watch. He didn’t need a watch to signal success or wealth because he had the real thing.

    Like


  81. Talking about Juvenal:

    (Satire VI)

    The author sets the frame for his satire with a hyperbolic presentation of the options available to the Roman male – marriage, suicide, or a boy lover.

    Are you even in this day and age preparing both a prenup
    and an engagement
    , and getting a trim from a master
    barber, and you have even perchance given the pledge to her finger?You certainly used to be healthy. Postumus, are you getting married?Tell me by what Fury and by what vipers you are goaded. Can you endure any Master-ess when there are so many good strong ropes,When high, vertiginous windows are wide open, when the Aemilian bridge offers itself to you – just right next door? Or if from so many options no mode of death strikes your fancy, Surely you think it better that a supple boy sleep with you?A boy, who does not conduct a nocturnal lawsuit at you, who wheedles no little gifts from you as he lies there, and neither complains because you are going easy on him, nor because you don’t gasp as much as he demands.

    Like


  82. Juvenal (Satire VI Synopsis)

    2. 2. Lust

    lines 6.38-59 – The notorious adulterer Ursidius wants a wife and children. He wants of wife of old-fashioned virtue, but he is insane to think he will get one.

    lines 6.60-81 – Marry a woman and an actor will become a father instead of you.

    lines 6.82-113 – Eppia, a senator’s wife, ran off to Egypt with a gladiator.

    lines 6.114-141 – Messalina, wife of Claudius, sneaked out of the palace to work at a brothel. Lust is the least of their sins, but greedy husbands allow it for the dowry.

    lines 6.142-160 – Men love a pretty face, not the woman. When she gets old, they kick her out.

    Like


  83. 2. 4. Quarrelsomeness

    lines 6.200-230 – Women torment even men they love and want to rule the home, then they just move on to another man – one with eight husbands in five years.

    lines 6.231-245 – A man will never be happy while his mother-in-law lives; she teaches her daughter evil habits.

    lines 6.246-267 – Women cause lawsuits and love to wrangle. Some elite women practice at gladiatorial exercises, perhaps with the idea of actually entering the arena.

    lines 6.268-285 – Women cover their own transgressions with accusations of their husband’s. If the husband catches them, they are even more indignant.

    Like


  84. 2. 5. Lack of Restraint

    lines 6.286-313 – Poverty and constant work kept women chaste previously. It was the excessive wealth that came with conquest that destroyed Roman morality with luxury.

    lines 6.314-345 – Two women profane the shrine of Pudicitia (Chastity). Description of the now perverted rites of the Bona Dea (Good Goddess).

    lines 6.O1-O34 – the Oxford Fragment – Cinaedi (pathic males) are a moral contamination; women listen to their advice. Cups should be shattered if they drink from them. Be sure the eunuchs guarding your wife are really eunuchs. Who will guard the guards themselves?

    lines 6.346-378 – Women both high and low are the same. Women are fiscally profligate and lack foresight and self-restraint.

    lines 6.379-397 – Some women are so enthralled by musicians that they will perform sacrifices to the gods for their victory in a contest, no less than if their own husband or child were sick.

    Like


  85. Much of hollywood is in small town America
    especially its decline
    A little Juvaderm, a little prozac
    it all falls into line

    Adapted from Thee Poett Firepowah’s works

    Like


  86. Unsociability

    lines 6.398-412 – Some women intrude into matters that pertain to men and are constantly blathering gossip and rumors.

    lines 6.413-433 – Some women are horrible neighbors and hostesses. Keeping their guests waiting then drinking and vomiting like a snake that has fallen into a vat of wine.

    lines 6.434-456 – Women who are educated and fancy themselves orators and grammarians, disputing literary points and noting every grammatical slip of their husbands, are repulsive.

    lines 6.457-473 – Rich women are utterly out of control. They only try to look presentable for their lovers. At home for their husbands they are covered in beauty concoctions.

    lines 6.474-511 – If a woman’s husband sleeps turned away, she tortures everyone at hand. Women rule their households like bloody tyrants. An army of maids is in attendance to get her ready for the public. She lives with the husband as if he were a stranger.

    Like


  87. 2. 7. Superstitions

    lines 6.511-541 – The eunuch priest of Bellona and the mother of the gods is given complete credence by some women. Others are fanatic adherents of the cult of Isis and its charlatan priests.

    lines 6.542-591 – Still others listen to Jewish or Armenian soothsayers, or believe in the prophetic abilities of Chaldaean astrologers. Even worse is a woman who is so skilled at astrology that others seek her out for advice. Poor women get their fortunes told down by the Circus Maximus.

    Like


  88. 2. 8. Drugs and Poisons

    lines 6.592-609 – At least poor women will have children. Rich women instead receive abortions to avoid the bother.

    But husbands should be glad since they would just become the father of a half-Ethiopian anyway. Women also get abandoned children to pass off as those of their husbands; these become the Roman elite – as Fortuna laughs.

    lines 6.610-626 – Women love to drug and poison their husbands to get their way. The wife of Caligula drove him insane with a potion, and Agrippina the Younger poisoned Claudius.

    lines 6.627-633 – The evil stepmother would like to poison rich stepchildren.

    Like


  89. 2. 3. Pretentiousness

    lines 6.161-183 – The narrator would prefer a prostitute for a wife over Cornelia, since virtuous women are often arrogant.

    lines 6.184-199 – Dressing and speaking Greek is not attractive, especially for old women.

    Like


  90. Death watches
    are the worst kind

    Just sayin…

    Like


  91. Roissy does resemble a modern day Juvenal. The best translation of the satires is by Peter Green for Penguin.

    Like


  92. @maurice – “props on nailing the modern equivalent of that pic”

    Thanks! 🙂

    Like


  93. I’ll stick with Rolex, IWC, Patek, and Cartier thank you.

    I like my watches the same way I like my women: with class, beauty, and pedigree. Plus, I like to wind both of them up. 😉

    Owning and wearing a fine timepiece shows clients and partners that you are successful, appreciate craftsmanship, and pay attention to detail. Clients definitely notice this.

    This pertains as well to clothing and shoes. Especially shoes! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen some idiot wearing a fine suit–only to notice that he’s wearing a Tag or Swiss Army watch and Kenneth Cole square-toed shoes!! He and his buddies might think it looks good. The dumb sluts at the club might like him. But his colleagues and the older, sophisticated clients think he looks like a complete douchebag.

    @ Morgan ~

    My avatar depicts the late writer and iconoclast Auberon Waugh (Son of Evelyn), just foolin’ around with a gun.

    Like


  94. Watches.

    At a guess I have the highest income of regular commenters on this board. Or up there anyway. Further I came from good upper upper middle class money family background growing up, way into SWPL territory. Prep school.

    What watch do I choose? The Navy Seal divers watch I linked above.

    Why? I don’t need a watch to appear well off. I’d rather emphasize the macho side of me. It’s real. But signaling it is good. As well some rebellion and going my own way from my “group”.

    Like


  95. The Anne Hathaway bad boy thing may well be greatly exaggerated.

    It seems entirely possible and approaching likely that she had no idea how shady and illegal his money making schemes were. It seems likely that she basically saw him as a connected Italian business guy who sometimes played a bit fast and loose.

    Like


  96. @ Doug1 ~

    Dude, if you feel the need to “emphasize the macho side of me” [what kind of sick psycho-babble shit is that?!], then there’s probably something wrong with you.

    You’re probably a beta. Or a douchebag.

    Like


  97. I think the problem with many betas is not that they’re ignorant of game, but simply that they have sub-par personalities. Or, they’re assholes.

    This comment isn’t directed at you, Doug1.

    Like


  98. As Roissy has noted many times before, the sex robots are coming.

    We already have sex robots. They’re called Asian women.

    Like


  99. on September 18, 2009 at 11:23 pm The Fifth Horseman

    We already have sex robots. They’re called Asian women.

    No. If that were the case, it would not be Japanese men inventing actual robots.

    Like


  100. No. If that were the case, it would not be Japanese men inventing actual robots.

    They’re inventing sex robots that will be loyal to them. 🙂

    Like


  101. “Owning and wearing a fine timepiece shows clients and partners that you are successful, appreciate craftsmanship, and pay attention to detail. Clients definitely notice this.

    This pertains as well to clothing and shoes. Especially shoes! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen some idiot wearing a fine suit–only to notice that he’s wearing a Tag or Swiss Army watch and Kenneth Cole square-toed shoes!!”

    “Especially shoes!”. Control yourself, Carrie Bradshaw.

    A subset of high-maintenance women shares your snobbery about watches, suits, and shoes, but most men don’t. That VC I mentioned who wore the Swiss Army doesn’t. A self-made real estate developer I know who owns a huge chunk of Brooklyn doesn’t. Last time I saw him, he picked up the tab for a table of twelve at Smith & Wollensky. He was in jeans and t-shirt, no watch at all. Heck, until recently, Warren Buffett was buying his suits off the rack. Now he gets them from some company in China. None of this would be any surprise to anyone who’s read The Millionaire Next Door. The fancy watch is more likely to be worn by the insurance salesmen trying to win business from the real estate developer in the t-shirt.

    Like


  102. William,

    Do you comment at Occidental Dissent under the handle “The Admiral”?

    Like


  103. At the time, this inexplicable phenomenon was known as “Puella pulcher apud agrestis”.

    Like


  104. on September 19, 2009 at 8:24 am glengarryglenpoon

    It was irresistible.

    Like


  105. on September 19, 2009 at 9:10 am gunslingergregi

    No watch at all fuck time he he he

    Like


  106. This is the watch I wear, because it is useful for what I do:

    World Timer

    What do I do? US Army Paratrooper and all around badass. This watch has survived numerous bad landings, falls during training, and fights.

    Still gets compliments from the ladies.

    Like


  107. He looks like he’s searching for breast lumps. You sure the thing on his head doesn’t mean ‘Roman doctor’?

    Like


  108. This is a common pose in ancient art. Usually it is a representation of a husband and wife on their wedding day.

    Like


  109. You are wrong on this one. Check out his ear – that guy was a pugilist, probably some badass who used his hands to beat other dudes to death. I’m sure the stupid hat was all her doing, and she painted it and those godawful earrings on after he received his final fatal concussion fighting Flavius that foreign fucker.

    Like


  110. on October 2, 2009 at 4:54 pm Southern Scrotic

    He may be a douche, but he’s no Pumpy.

    Like


  111. I peed in a horse once.

    Like


  112. on October 2, 2009 at 6:22 pm Captain Bringdown

    Darksock, you whore, you’ve peed in just about anything that didn’t see you coming first.

    Like


  113. […] The World’s First “Hot Chick With Douchebag”? « Roissy in DC roissy.wordpress.com/2009/09/17/the-worlds-first-hot-chick-with-douchebag – view page – cached Tunic unbuttoned down to navel to display sprouts of chest hair? Check. Thousand yard stare of stupidity? Check. — From the page […]

    Like


  114. Look…The World’s First “Hot Chick With Douchebag”?

    Like