The Easiest Way To Revive A Flagging Relationship

Beta backsliding is a fact of life. Even the hardest alphas will occasionally show flashes of humanity that rev their women’s shit testing engines. Most of these moments are brief and dismissible, but woe to the man who can’t recognize his embetafying ineptitude; he will slowly lose dominant control of his relationships until one day he’s so scared of his woman that he believes her when she says she’ll leave him if he goes through with a paternity test.

When you become experienced with women your alert system for beta backsliding is so honed that you can tell within seconds of your woman pulling away from you which of your behaviors was the cause. When your awareness of the sexual matrix is fully advanced, you will even be able to tell with frightening accuracy how your woman will react to your behavior *before she has reacted*. Like aural bullets of shit tests flying at you from all directions, your Neo Game will slow time and warp space, stopping her shit tests in front of you, which you then send right back at her with double the force. A master of female psychology (MFP) is indistinguishable from a clairvoyant, predicting women’s actions before they have happened based on nothing more than a well-developed understanding of a woman’s animal nature.

The day will come when you get so good at this that you will throw beta chum in the water just to amuse yourself with her predictable response, in much the same way women amuse themselves by wrapping lesser men around their fingers with ostentatious displays of cleavage or flirty signals of sexual interest.

Which brings us to our question: What does a man do when he has lost the upper hand and his relationship is on the fast track to fail if he doesn’t take steps to arrest it? First, he must assess what led him to his predicament. Did he hug her too tightly in public? Did he make kissy face with her in front of other men? Did he nestle his head in her lap? Did he say “sorry”? Did he cry after sex? Did he do all of these things plus tell her she’s beautiful? If so, then he shouldn’t be surprised if she complains about his PDA, or moans about spending too much time together.

When a woman pulls back, a typical man’s instinct will be to try and fix his flagging relationship. Men do; that’s how we’re designed. Unfortunately, more often than not this male instinct to action will drive the nails into the coffin of his dying relationship. Most men overreact, either in the beta direction or the alpha direction. A beta will coo and pout and swarm with rays of undying love until his woman is repulsed and leaves him with her heart light and unburdened. An alpha will control and demean and lash out like an angry tyrant until his woman falls into the arms of a more charming man.

I have a better way. My advice is so simple that any man — from alpha to omega — can follow it with success. It’s this:

The easiest way to revive a flagging relationship is to cut off all contact.

That’s it. No routines to memorize, no alpha body language to learn, no reframing required; just one simple solution: Cut off all contact. No phone calls, no texts, no emails, no midnight drive-bys at her apartment. Nothing until she reinitiates contact with you.

And I guarantee that nine out of ten times she *will* reinitiate contact. Women cannot resist chasing a man who has made himself unavailable. The disappearing act is every man’s ace in the hole; women are nearly powerless to it. They have no defense. All it requires of the man is willpower. If you find it hard to be away from your woman’s pussy for more than a day, then you will have to find substitutes while in the No Contact Zone. A man on top of his game will have other women to service him. Lesser men will need to turn to porn or hookers. Or eat a lot of tofu and lick plastic bottles to lower his testosterone.

Depending on length of relationship and severity of the man’s beta offense, the No Contact Zone can last anywhere from a couple of days to a month. The beauty of this solution to revive a dying relationship is that even those rare times when she does not reinitiate contact you will have saved yourself time and energy dating a woman who was likely to dump you soon anyhow. And on the flimsiest pretext, like getting a smile from a high status bike messenger.

Note that I did not say this is the *best* method for rescuing a relationship on the rocks. I said it was the easiest method with the highest return for the minimal investment. If you’re a busy guy who can’t be bothered to run expert level effortless-seeming game, or if you’re a recovering beta who isn’t yet confident enough in his LTR game to risk a more proactive approach to a dying LTR, then the No Contact Zone is for you.

There’s one other thing you must know. If you don’t do this final step the right way then your No Contact Zone game will be for naught. Assuming she reinitiates contact (and she likely will), expect her to say something like this:

“Hey there! Haven’t heard from you in a while. What have you been up to?”

If your No Contact Zone game hit the mark, you will detect a hint of nervousness in her voice. Congratulations, sir, you have regained hand. BUT… you can lose it all if you in any way ACKNOWLEDGE the No Contact ruse. Like Fight Club, the first rule is to not talk about it. That means you act as if NOTHING IS UNUSUAL about your calculated time away from her.

“Hey, what’s up! Eh you know, the usual stuff, work, life. Did I tell you about my new hobby? Single malt scotch… oh yeeeah.”

This will, naturally, drive her mentally insane. Fitfully for us men, mental insanity in women triggers seismic gina tremors. She will invite herself over for (in her mind) make up sex. Your job is to step aside and let the hamster in her head spin itself to exhaustion as you fornicate to the wee hours.

One more thing. If she presses you on your absence, say by asking “Why haven’t you called me?”, you deny complicity in her frame. In other words, don’t allow yourself to get entrapped by her frame by answering defensively. Either deny her accusation (“You’re very forgetful. I called you a few days ago.”) or reframe the conversation to a focus on her clinginess (“I didn’t know I was supposed to call you every single second of the day. Aw, it’s cute that you think about me so much. Adorable!”)

Played right, No Contact Zone game is absolutely devastating to a woman’s sense of relationship entitlement and her bloated hypergamous ego.





Comments


  1. Timely, was just talking about this with a friend.

    Like


  2. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

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  3. “A beta will coo and pout and swarm with rays of undying love until his woman is repulsed and leaves him with her heart light and unburdened. An alpha will control and demean and lash out like an angry tyrant until his woman falls into the arms of a more charming man.”

    This rings true. A couple days ago I had a woman tell me, “I can’t do this anymore. We are so mean to each other, I know we’re just joking but I can’t do it anymore” I have cut off all contact since then and don’t plan on initiating it EVER again. I think she’s sincere (this isn’t a shit test).

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  4. Good writing.

    I’m trying this tack right now with two girls but struggling with both.

    Just started going out with an East European girl and logistics have been hell (she lives way out on the opposite side of London) so it’s been once a week. Now she’s had to rush back to her home country due to her grandmother dying. She’ll be back in a week or so. She called me twice the night before she left (I answered while clubbing, making sure girls were laughing in the background) and then, given her emotional state over the death of a loved one, I reined in my asshold game a bit and sent 2 nice guy texts. She didn’t reply to the second so my plan is radio silence until she reinitiates.

    How do you react to the reverse scenario? One girl I closed while she was visiting the UK for a month but has now gone back to France for the term time. She’s in the top tier of my greatest ever scores. How to keep this one enmeshed until her end of term holidays? We weren’t solid enough that I can just announce I’m coming to her Uni town with some friends.

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  5. Makes sense. This is one of the (very) few ways where doing the right thing comes naturally to me.

    I hate talking on the phone or interrupting what I’m doing by texting if I’m with a friend. I usually get a call/text/im the next morning with a ‘hey where were you?’

    I’ve never had to rescue my relationship but this does seem like the best route to take. Absolutely agree that gaming can backfire if done poorly. That’s by far the hardest part of when you first learn this stuff… not overcompensating.

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  6. ”””””Lesser men will need to turn to porn or hookers. Or eat a lot of tofu and lick plastic bottles to lower his testosterone.””””””””

    That was a good one.

    ”””””When you become experienced with women your alert system for beta backsliding is so honed that you can tell within seconds of your woman pulling away from you which of your behaviors was the cause. When your awareness of the sexual matrix is fully advanced, you will even be able to tell with frightening accuracy how your woman will react to your behavior *before she has reacted*. Like aural bullets of shit tests flying at you from all directions, your Neo Game will slow time and warp space, stopping her shit tests in front of you, which you then send right back at her with double the force. A master of female psychology (MFP) is indistinguishable from a clairvoyant, predicting women’s actions before they have happened based on nothing more than a well-developed understanding of a woman’s animal nature.

    The day will come when you get so good at this that you will throw beta chum in the water just to amuse yourself with her predictable response, in much the same way women amuse themselves by wrapping lesser men around their fingers with ostentatious displays of cleavage or flirty signals of sexual interest.
    ””””””””

    sweet

    Like


  7. Or eat a lot of tofu and lick plastic bottles to lower his testosterone

    Back on top of your game with this one R. Good show!

    One more thing. If she presses you on your absence, say by asking “Why haven’t you called me?”, you deny complicity in her frame.

    One I found that works well is turning it back on her with a deft parry and riposte. She asks, “Why haven’t you called me?”, you respond “why haven’t YOU called ME?”

    Another one that comes in handy for situations where turning up the asshole factor is warranted is the ‘obvious bullshit non-answer’.

    You: “I was busy”
    Her: “Busy with what?”
    You: “You know, stuff.”

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  8. Can somebody elaborate on “relationship entitlement”? We owe it to them?

    Luckily for me, I guess, most women I’ve met recently want a relationship as little as I do.

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  9. Great post.

    Actually, I think this should be applied pre-emptively as well.

    In fact, I had such a great weekend with one of my girls (3 nights in Vegas) I am probably putting her in No Contact this week just to keep things tight.

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  10. This method goes hand and hand with first time dating. If a chick is doing something that you don’t like, or sending off red flags, you cut contact and let her get back to you.

    Example: She is pouty on your date, complaining about everything, something isn’t right, and it runs deeper than not having a good time. Something is up. You cut the date short, and cut off contact. You’re putting her in a timeout box without telling her.

    And of course, if she calls and asks Why, what, yadda yadda? You play if off like nothing, insert humor, or you frame it up and say (asuming you like her enough and her legs are long enough), we’ll go out again (date and time) and have a great time like last time right?

    If she strikes out a second time,, forget it. You don’t need that baggage.

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  11. on November 23, 2009 at 12:55 pm personal trainer

    Im learning. this is something I do well and I believe its important to note to NEVER give her an answer she expects, wants, decides. Keep her guessing and chasing her tail. Thats where you want her mind to be. Put her to work.

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  12. This is hard to do if you actually live with the woman. But you can do it in small doses. If you normally call her at work for a one-minute check-in every afternoon, don’t call. If you normally get home at 6:30, don’t tell her that you are going to be late; let her call your cell, and you answer at a loud bar at 8:00, mumbling something about meeting friends.

    I don’t use these when my woman is “pulling away from me,” but rather on the rare occasions when she is giving me shit (almost always for something I did, indeed, do wrong) and I want her to worry a bit about her attitude. If she loves you, it’s like playing paddle ball….the harder you whack her, the faster she comes back to you, cooing and apologetic.

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  13. I’ve had a few guys try to do this to me. It’s only worked once.

    With the rest of them, it was simply a relief to have one less drain on my time.

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  14. Poetry –

    The beauty of this solution to revive a dying relationship is that even those rare times when she does not reinitiate contact you will have saved yourself time and energy dating a woman who was likely to dump you soon anyhow.

    Like


  15. Are You Drinking Water from a Plastic Bottle? Do You Know the Risks?
    Posted on 2006-10-03 10:30:54 in Industry News |
    A wealth of medical research has revealed that a chemical used to make hard, clear plastics called bisphenol A (BPA), such as those found in baby bottles, food-storage containers and the lining of soda cans, has reached epidemic proportions in America.

    Each year, over 6 billion tons of BPA are used to make plastics. The problem occurs when the plastic is heated causing the chemical bonds that BPA forms to unravel contaminating the water or food it is held in.

    In addition, washing or exposing plastic to acidic foods can cause the BPA to leach out into the food…

    Plastic Industry in State of Denial And while the plastic industry fails to see the need for alarm regarding the health impact of this chemical, researcher with no ties to the industry beg to differ.

    Research Findings: Scientist studying BPA have found that BPA imitates the sex hormone estradiol (estrogen). It is well accepted that even small amounts of estrogen can induce profound changes in the body. This has raised a red flag and caused concern among the scientific community that even the lowest levels of BPA could have a negative impact on one?s health.

    There is growing evidence (among mice and rats) that low doses of BPA can cause:

    v Hyperactivity

    v Early puberty

    v Increased fat formation

    v Abnormal sexual behavior

    v Disrupted reproductive cycles

    v Structural damage to the brain

    Who is telling the Truth? You Be the Judge

    Of the 115 published studies researchers reviewed on the low-dose effects of BPA, 94 of them reported harmful effects on mice and rats; 21 did not.

    Coincidentally, none of the 11 studies funded by chemical companies found harmful effects caused by BPA, which the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention has reported is detected in 95 percent of all patients tested.

    On the other hand, more than 90 percent of the studies conducted by scientists not associated with the chemical industry [text in blue] discovered negative consequences.

    Poetry of Flesh:

    How do you know that handful of guys was “trying this on” you, and did not authentically just meet other women? Maybe they were running game on you, or they might have just met somebody else.

    On the subject of plastic bottles: Men in China who work at the factories complain of sexual problems. I saw that on the AP wire a few weeks back.

    For the guys: Dont use soaps or shampoos with either lavedner or tea tree oils therein. They have been shown to cause gynochomastia (bitch tits) on pre-pubescent boys. A study on the oils showed that some chemicals within them can block the human androgen receptor while stimulating the estrogen receptor. Thats about as good a formula as one could concoct to lower a man’s sex drive and make him less assertive. http://www.nih.gov/news/pr/jan2007/niehs-31.htm

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  16. Mr.M,

    If only I had been in a relationship with any of them. The one who did pull away successfully was the one who got me. The others… simply lovers who wanted more claim, wanted me to chase so they didn’t feel like one of my sexual sled-team. It comes off like an out-of-character, last ditch attempt by men lacking enough innate knowledge of game.

    [editor: you never answered my leetle question. do you believe your slutting is more likely to help or hurt your chances of getting commitment from a high quality man?]

    Like


  17. i’m actually sort of in the same boat as krauser. my game was water-tight for the first few days but i’ve been floundering a little and i’m wondering if it’s bc i’m trying too hard. i still keep letting up moments of betaness (i find it extremely difficult to run true ‘asshole’ game bc i have such a strong inclination towards childish ideals about romance/love) but my real problem is that i can’t tell whether this is just all in my head or not. i have a suspicion that roissy was right about estonian girls — you can run a 9 as you’d run a 6 — but i want to err on the side of caution.

    Like


  18. We need Dave From Hawaii to contribute the married / living with her version of “how to pull out of a beta nosedive”. It’s hard to cut off contact if she lives with you, and there’s all the more opportunity for her to notice beta backsliding if she’s always around.

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  19. BTW—–

    Roissy wrote:

    “The day will come when you get so good at this that you will throw beta chum in the water just to amuse yourself with her predictable response, in much the same way women amuse themselves by wrapping lesser men around their fingers with ostentatious displays of cleavage or flirty signals of sexual interest.”

    God feminists must hate you. You are getting about 6 thousand page views a day, and I guarantee you some of them are academic feminazis. The thought of men out there using psychology to toy with college-aged (their fantasy-selves) women probably makes their jaws clench, breath shorten, eyes water, and blood pressure increase. Hopefully their cortisol levels shoot up and the systemic ph levels increase in acidity, which in turn should induce an enviorment more cultivating to arterial plaques that will help them develop heart disease and alzheimers. I can hope can’t I?

    Like


  20. No contact is an excellent reset no doubt, but it’s the kiss of death if you don’t follow up and consolidate correctly when you reestablish contact. The single worst rookie mistake and epic shit test you can fail is to fall prey to being perceived as ‘sulky’.

    If you were beta before your period of no contact, you will be omega if she calls you out as ‘sulking’ for 2 weeks. “Aww, did you get your panties all up in a knot sulking for a couple weeks?” Game over, you’re done. The more you use this no contact reset, the more likely you’ll be perceived as sulking. It will eventually get to the point where you’re irrecoverably a sulking beta.

    The art involved in a non contact attention withdrawal is the same principle used for a takeaway – you’re denying attention as a reward. The single best tool in your PUA tool kit is a woman’s imagination. A no contact withdrawal reestablishes competition anxiety and the imaginings start to do their work. All of this tension will amount to shit and resentment if she feels her concern was misplaced because you’re really a sulking beta that no woman would compete with her for anyway. You’ve just given her confirmation of it.

    NEVER overtly acknowledge the purpose of your non contact. She’ll doubt your veracity enough as it is. Consolidate appropriately; be ambiguous as to your reasons for not being as available to her as you’d been previously, but it’s best to make your story plausible as well as unavoidably responsible. Telling her you’ve been busy playing Modern Warfare 2 on your XBox for the past two weeks doesn’t carry the same weight as explaining that you’ve been taking care of your sick grandmother or working on some very ambitious project at work. That should be tempered with a good bit of ambiguity of course so as to plant some seed of doubt and stimulate that competition anxiety imaginings.

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  21. Question: Been working on a girl who has a BF that she told me she was “in-between ” breaking up with – yr long relationship that’s supposedly not doing well. We went on a date (which she requested) had a great time that ended with a make out session which she initiated. Fast forward – she ends up getting very guilty and starts pulling away from me.

    I know the play here: haven’t made any contact with her, not even an attempt – silence for 2 weeks now. My question is, what if she reinitiates? Do I ignore her text and see how she handles that? Or Is it better to maybe not answer for a day or 2 then keep it short , sweet and indifferent? I don’t want to fall into the trap of being her texting bf or sometimes meet up guy when her gina needs tingling.

    Like


  22. I’m in this situation now, so far been a week with no contact.

    I remember when I couldn’t bring myself to do this though – had endless idiotic conversations trying to logically persuade woman to not break up with me. Not surprisingly, didn’t work once.

    I think an important facet of game is being aware of game that’s run on YOU and how this is a possible shit test. Someone breaking up with you triggers a feeling of scarcity, and it’s good to be aware that you’re actually no worse off than before you met her – in fact, you’re better off from the relationship knowledge you’ve gained. Sometimes breakups are like when marketers put up a sign that says “limited supply” when they actually have plenty in stock. By breaking off contact you reverse that game and become the scarce item. From a psychological perspective, the things we can’t have become more valuable to us.

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  23. as an aside, i can get a pretty much unanimous chorus of agreement from men when i say that one of the biggest turn-offs to even initiating is when a woman has a frantic, TV-dramaesque revolving-door of male admirers, lovers, “best friends” and so on. women with countless brätwursts poking at every inch of sticky skin also tend in the extreme to be the most irritating, boring faux-headcases in the world.

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  24. @Personal trainer
    I’m really hoping you are not the last guy that I was dating…..cause he was a personal trainer too and this “no contact” thing worked EXCEPTIONALLY well on me.

    After the “no contact game” that the last guy ran on me Ive begun doing the following to deflect it and keep the upper hand:

    (1) I do not initiate text messaging/calling a guy I’m attracted to and if he sends me a text message before the first time he ever calls I don’t respond to the texts.

    (2)When/If he finally calls I respond by saying “I’m not into long conversations via text when I really want to get to know someone better. I just use texting when I don’t need an immediate response to something or if I can’t talk at the moment.” If he cuts the convo short after I say that I figure no-harm no-foul because at this point I’m not too attracted to him anyways and thus, unlikely to give chase.

    (2) I don’t ask men “why havent you been calling/texting/whatever-ing me?”

    The most imporant thing I’ve learned (learning, really) to do to avoid going crazy while in the no-contact zone: KEEP MY EMOTIONS UNDER CONTROL! The law of detachment is the best thing ever.

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  25. Dude. Rollo Tomassi—get a blog, kid. You bring the Jedi Mind Shit on a consistent basis. Rock on.

    Like


  26. Great advice for everyone.

    I often pull the “disappearing act”.

    Human nature: we all want what we can’t have.

    – MPM

    Like


  27. on November 23, 2009 at 1:48 pm personal trainer

    @ Jamila

    Text me baby!

    Like


  28. Reminds me of the D.E.N.N.I.S system.

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  29. Brad said

    This rings true. A couple days ago I had a woman tell me, “I can’t do this anymore. We are so mean to each other, I know we’re just joking but I can’t do it anymore” I have cut off all contact since then and don’t plan on initiating it EVER again. I think she’s sincere (this isn’t a shit test).

    Not to single you out, Brad, but that last sentence betrays a common misunderstanding about women. When men learn about things like shit tests, they get the concept intellectually and are eager to learn the proper responses. But they still don’t get the inner psychology of women.

    The common mistake is to assume that the shit test is a deliberate, calculating test by the woman. But it’s not. It’s instinct. Of course, women are capable of cruel, deliberate testing and mocking of a man, like when they sense blood in the water in a social situation and want men to fight over them or something.

    But in a relationship, in a seduction, even in an office friendship, women shit test men because they are programmed to do it. Just like a guy checking out a girl’s rack. He does not say, “And now I shall initiate a brief, surreptitious visual reconnaissance of her breastal region for purposes of assessing her overall desirability.” No… his eyes just shoot over without even thinking about it. He’s checking her out. Same with girls and their shit tests. Shit tests are a woman’s version of checking you out.

    Which brings me back to the comment about her “being sincere” versus “shit testing.” It can very easily be both. She sincerely doesn’t want to be with you for whatever reason … smelled beta in the water perhaps, and so her breaking things off is very sincere. But if you responded to that like a complete alpha and she was around to see it, she would mysteriously find other reasons that she was attracted to you. And she will never say — to you, to herself, or to her girlfriends — “Well, he passed my test; he must be alpha. I like him again.” Wrong, wrong, wrong. She says to herself “Wow… he’s so sensitive and mysterious,” or “Such dreamy blue eyes,” or “He just makes me laugh… guys like that really are rare,” or whatever else.

    Women don’t consciously screen out betas. They do it because they can’t help it.

    Like


  30. z,

    How do you know that handful of guys was “trying this on” you, and did not authentically just meet other women? Maybe they were running game on you, or they might have just met somebody else.

    A few weeks of silence would be aberrant behavior to them, then several calls, along with leading conversations. I can appreciate how difficult it is, what a blow to the ego it can be, when a girl doesn’t pursue. But I’m not a chaser. I find it demeaning and potentially violating of the other person’s boundaries. Social influences dictate that guys aren’t supposed to be one of a number, that it’s supposed to be the reverse. Truly, if any of them, were the type I would date, they would never put up with that behavior in me.

    [editor: you never answered my leetle question. do you believe your slutting is more likely to help or hurt your chances of getting commitment from a high quality man?]

    A. You regularly dodge my questions.
    B. I did answer it.

    Logically, I’ve already “slutted” past my expiration date in the majority of men’s eyes. What has it done for me? Increased my knowledge, increased my social experience, and made me a good lover. Games that work on the standard woman tend not to work on me because I’ve been subjected to them enough in the past. I never cheat on my commited partners because I know that lust simply is something that comes, goes, and is meaningless. I have excellent self-control and awareness of my body, as well as awareness of my sexuality that most women will never grasp. I’m able to tell a high-quality man from a low-quality, able to cockblock or wing as needed, able to deflect and defend without thinking, and set most men at ease.

    And I don’t flag slut-dar. I dress calm, conservate. I’m polite, I don’t ooze sex, I don’t look or act easy. I’m a college graduate (and going back for my Master’s in fall), have a steady job, financially stable, healthy social networks, and am decently intelligent.

    If a man, no matter his station in life, no matter his finances, his connections, cannot get over social/sexual norms and is unable to be comfortable in his own sexuality, then he isn’t high quality. He’s just another man (and there’s many of them) with a sizeable paycheck and social skills. I expect more than that.

    So, no I don’t think that my slutting hurts my chances with a high-quality man. Because high-quality is more than a man and his expensive toys, large paychecks and overpriced dinners. It’s more than alpha behavior, than game.

    You might think it’s foolish, and maybe it is, but I know what I value, and I know what is worthless.

    Like


  31. on November 23, 2009 at 1:58 pm attention whore

    The Easiest Way To Revive A Flagging Relationship??

    Amazing how complicated something so easy is.

    Like


  32. @personal trainer

    LMAO, OMG!!!

    If you are him Im going on an internet sabbatical! That would be toooo hilarious.

    Personal trainers are definitely the sexiest men around though, very personable types but promiscuous like you wouldn’t believe! ( ok, you probably would believe it 🙂

    Like


  33. Will the No Contact Zone work if you’ve already overreacted by controlling, demeaning and lashing out like an angry tyrant?

    I’m trying and it hasn’t worked yet. It’s already been close to a month.

    Like


  34. @Poetry of Flesh

    I’m a woman, but if you’re a white woman I don’t think your slutting will hurt you with men either. It seems like no matter how much slutting it up white women may do, they always seem to be able to get married in the end.

    Like


  35. on November 23, 2009 at 3:01 pm Wendy Schwartz

    I like how you all called me ridiculous for pretty much doing this exact same thing to men (since I was old enough to date) and saying it works.

    Whether you like it or not, this works with ALL men EVERY time (the ignoring, waving-off, refusing to answer his texts, turning down 1 date for every 3 he asks you on, etc.)

    You’d be surprised how after a “first date” with a man, they will call/text a woman feverishly after about a day (expecting the woman to have already started calling, texting, and trying to plan the next date) as if in disbelief that the woman couldn’t give a fuck less whether she has a second date with him or not.

    It works the same with both sexes.

    Like


  36. on November 23, 2009 at 2:02 pm gunslingergregi

    Jamila

    Baiter check

    Still doesn’t remind anyone of anyone?

    lol

    Like


  37. rollo tommasi got it right – this technique is very context-dependent, based on the way the relationship had been going. and also how much the girl is or isn’t into you. still good stuff though.

    Like


  38. on November 23, 2009 at 2:03 pm personal trainer

    @ Jamila

    Your right about the sexy part.

    Like


  39. Jamila

    … no matter how much slutting it up white women may do, they always seem to be able to get married in the end.

    this is a great observation, but dont forget by the time they hit 22, black women sluts always have 4 kids so its a matter of using birth control. no guy will marry a 23 year old slut with 6 kids

    Like


  40. @jamila- how about sharing that pic with the rest of us..?

    Like


  41. Parents using Dog Whisperer techniques on their kids:

    http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/22/fashion/22dog.html?_r=1&em

    Next up, Urban Slut Machine Whisperer

    Like


  42. Being elusive is always good for any man, at any time.

    Like


  43. Personal trainers are male escorts

    Like


  44. can’t really add much to this post besides the fact that it has worked for me in the past.

    this is a perfect game for men to employ because it weeds out the quality from the not-so quality.

    Like


  45. maurice,

    You horndog. Don’t make me fly out there. ;P

    Like


  46. wow what a boring tactic, i just ask out her cutest friend, even if they say no the news that im looking will spread.

    Like


  47. While I agree 100% on the effectiveness of the cut-off-contact advice…I think there is a bigger point here:

    The only merit in relationships is the ability to lower your guard and relax. Of course this eventually lowers attraction (yours and hers). Thats when you move on to the next girl.

    My point being: Once you have a girl in a LTR, just have fun. When things die with her, move on to the next girl. There is a natural circle of life in this.

    No need to game a girl you’ve already fucked multiple times. Unless you married her, but then that was your mistake!

    Like


  48. @Firepower re:white women

    “this is a great observation, but dont forget by the time they hit 22, black women sluts always have 4 kids so its a matter of using birth control. no guy will marry a 23 year old slut with 6 kids”

    Only rarely do they have that many kids. My experience is that they have one or two kids, and two or three abortions under their belts.

    Like


  49. poetry of flesh: no matter how many masters degrees you get, no matter how well you “hide” your bruised soul or rationalize it as “awareness of your sexuality,” and no matter how you attempt to rearrange the meaning of “quality man” to “some narrow chested loser who will shack up with a slut,” you have lower value as an old slut than you did as a young ingenue. That’s just a fact of life.

    Not that there is anything wrong with that. There are worse things you could do to lower your value.

    Like


  50. @poetry- what, just because i want to see a pic of a new commenter, that roissy himself has favorably commented upon, means i’m a horndog? i may or may not be one, but that request by itself is not proof. also, come see me any time.

    @jamila – how about it?

    Like


  51. @Maurice

    I doubt I’ll post my pic on here. If I do show myself it’ll be once I start up my own blog again.

    Like


  52. Great post.

    What’s a good way to react if a girl does this to you?

    I was seeing a girl casually. We would see each other once a week, talk a few times a week. She was pushing for monogamy. I resisted. She recently left for a business trip for three weeks and said “I’ll give you a call when I get back.” Zero contact.

    Do I talk to her nonchalantly when she returns? Do I perform the disappearing act for a while? Is it beta of me to ‘tolerate’ this?

    Like


  53. @ El Cheif

    That dog-whisperer piece in the NYT also applies to women. Roissy has said as much recently, and I believe it too. To think that even parents have lost the sense of being the leader, of projecting calm and assertive authority over their children, it’s no wonder that so many guys don’t know how to handle women. If you can’t manage your own child, if you think it is somehow REPRESSIVE to manage your own child’s behavior, how the fuck are you going to deal with an adult woman?

    Let’s be clear. Children take orders from mommy and daddy both. But ultimately, either mommy or daddy has to wear the pants and be the enforcer; there cannot be two. Even without children, couples are happiest when one of them tends toward dominance. It is hard for a lot of guys raised in the U.S. to adapt this role, and it is hard for a lot of women here to cede authority to the man (especially in a place like DC), but for a relationship to work over the long term, you both need to lean in opposite directions: the dominant and the submissive.

    Feminists and their male apologists will denounce this (my colleagues look aghast when I tell them how my relationship works), but fuck ’em……they’re mostly unhappy, bitter, and frustrated with their relationships (“it takes a lot of work”), while mine is clear sailing. Obviously, you don’t need to (nor should you) be the boss all the time; I’m talking about inclinations, tendencies, and clearly assigned roles in certain situations. When I’m driving, and my old lady starts telling me to watch out for such and such, I literally tell her to shut the fuck up. She, on the other hand, her her realms, such as housecleaning and bill-paying, in which I don’t interfere. There are plenty of conversations in the house, shared decisions, joint efforts, and mutual respect and admiration, but when the final tally is taken, there is one boss, and that is me. And that’s the way she likes it.

    Like


  54. @Mike

    What are you tolerating? lol

    I think you sound beta from the way you describe the situation. If the women left for three weeks and said she’ll call you when she gets back, why are you overanalyzing the situation and she isn’t even back yet?

    If she calls you when she gets back, she calls.
    If she doesn’t call you when she gets back, she doesn’t.

    Either way, you should be proactively going about your own business instead of wondering what this all means when it probably means exactly what she said: she’s just going out of town on business and will call you when she gets back.

    Like


  55. on November 23, 2009 at 3:16 pm gunslingergregi

    ””””’When I’m driving, and my old lady starts telling me to watch out for such and such, I literally tell her to shut the fuck up. ””””””’

    I just leave her on the side of the road and make her hitch hike back home.

    Like


  56. Mike: Okay, so what if I don’t want to give up on her?
    Rob: You don’t call.
    Mike: But you said I don’t call if I wanted to give up on her.
    Rob: Right.
    Mike: So I don’t call either way?
    Rob: Right.
    Mike: So what’s the difference?
    Rob: There is no difference right now. See, Mike, the only difference between giving up and not giving up is if you take her back when she wants to come back. But you can’t do anything to make her want to come back. In fact, you can only do stuff to make her not want to come back.
    Mike: So the only difference is if I forget about her or just pretend to forget about her?
    Rob: Right.
    Mike: Well that sucks.
    Rob: Yeah, it sucks.
    Mike: So it’s just like a retroactive decision, then? I mean I could, like, forget about her and then when she comes back make like I just pretended to forget about her?
    Rob: Right. Although probably more likely the opposite.
    Mike: What do you mean?
    Rob: I mean at first you’re going to pretend to forget about her, you’ll not call her, I don’t know, whatever… but then eventually, you really will forget about her.
    Mike: Well what if she comes back first?
    Rob: Mmmm… see, that’s the thing, is somehow they know not to come back until you really forget.
    Mike: There’s the rub.
    Rob: There’s the rub.

    –Swingers

    Like


  57. Lupo,

    no matter how many masters degrees you get, no matter how well you “hide” your bruised soul or rationalize it as “awareness of your sexuality,” and no matter how you attempt to rearrange the meaning of “quality man” to “some narrow chested loser who will shack up with a slut,” you have lower value as an old slut than you did as a young ingenue. That’s just a fact of life.

    We’re all somewhat bruised, sir.

    Much as we all have different values and ideas of happiness.

    As well as polite behavior, I notice.

    Old slut? Narrow chested loser?

    Unlikely. Just as unlikely as you ever addressing your quite obvious issues. You might have decent game, I really don’t know, but you’re significantly more damaged than I’ll ever be. And, at your age, it’s also unlikely you’ll ever bother to fix it, much less acknowledge it.

    Me? I’ve got years and drive.

    Like


  58. Tried and tested. I’ve done this (with no outcome in mind) to a girl who many years ago dumped me for being a beta chump – having gotten some good game, she’s now insane about me, continually telling me that she needs a new fuckbuddy and that she’d like to meet up again.
    It drives her fucking NUTS that I self-evidently don’t give enough of a shit about her to go months without contact.

    Like


  59. ^ terrible syntactical fuck ups in my message above. but life goes on.

    Like


  60. “It works the same with both sexes.”

    Duh. A lot of game is taking tactics that women have traditionally used against men and using it on them instead. This is just more of the same, known as “being hard to get” or “making him work for it” when women do it.

    The sad thing is that modern American (and some other western) women are so unfiltered. They may be educated in book terms but have no self-knowledge or ability to judge character. That’s one reason so many fall for game. Others, might realize what’s going on but play along for their own reasons.

    Like


  61. Maurice,

    If you were still going to be in DC next year, I’d come by and say hello. I’m thinking of visiting there for spring break. Should be fun.

    Roissy,

    Lupo’s response? Perfect illustration. Even if he was a loaded, attractive, “high quality” gent, I still wouldn’t touch that. Because that screams “angry little boy” to me, and I have standards.

    Like


  62. I’ve had a few guys try to do this to me. It’s only worked once

    Poetry

    how exactly you know that guys tried this on you, unless you call them back ? ? ?

    From the opposing trench, it is normal to stop calling a girl once something better appears, then suddenly, when you least expect, the former girl calls you back (usually becasue she read something I used as a tag in msn or facebook) and you kind of win the lottery.

    Like


  63. @Jamila & Paul Revere

    Thanks. That makes sense.

    Like


  64. What would be the equivalent step I wonder in a live-in LTR (with kids)? It’s not easy to just have no contact, but there are I assume some sort of equivalent actions available to the beta backslider.

    Like


  65. why so much hate against sluts pairing with betas?

    from what I see, most born-again sluts do make good wives, as long as some threshold of betaness is not crossed. And guess what, born again sluts, having been burned by alphas for years, do tend to accept more betaness than more prudish girls, who haven´t tasted the dark side of the male gender.

    there is even an element of Christian redemption in slut/beta pairs.

    Like


  66. on November 23, 2009 at 5:08 pm Wendy Schwartz

    Cliff that was sort of my point. It’s just a new twist on a very very old game.

    That’s why I don’t get why guys need a blog, a community, seminars, and a bunch of books to figure this out.

    Like


  67. This works. I once went 4 days without uttering a word to my girlfriend…and we lived together. She couldn’t stay away. It does take a lot willpower.

    Like


  68. You know I am really wracking my brain trying to remember a single instance when I gained some meaningful insight into the machinations of the female mind from the women on this blog.

    Women, why are you here? I don’t want you. Does anyone see any value here? It just seems like half baked bullshit ideas and rhetoric designed to confuse us.

    Like


  69. There is nothing more simultaneously frightening and arousing to a woman than a Man self-aware enough to acknowledge his own value to women.

    It is for this reason he must be ridiculed, demonized, marginalized and shamed for recognizing his own worth as a commodity by women to put him back into his previously unconscious position. Casting doubt is a woman’s last resort.

    Like


  70. I don’t think so gig. When I become a beta, no slut for me.

    Like


  71. gig,

    I’m not rude, and I nearly always pick up my phone. I’ve been “slutting” for nine or so years now. I think it’s safe to say I know what I’m doing. Recognizing when men are starting to cling, or play games to induce cling in me, is something I’ve had to learn.

    Dkt,

    Women are worthless. Find yourself a high quality man. I’ve been led to believe that there are several commenting on this blog. Happy hunting.

    Like


  72. I may be mistaken but I believe you can sample more Rollo Tomassi on sosuave.net. His stuff has been good for a long time.

    Like


  73. on November 23, 2009 at 6:43 pm Wendy Schwartz

    Simple, most guys like me where raised in single mother homes, when you asked about women…she said “you’re a good catch, just be yourself”….which doesn’t prepare you for the games women play…

    Oh, that’s ridiculous. “Being yourself” is something that isn’t realistic in careers, society, or dating. It’s not “single mothers” who do that specifically. It’s dumb yuppie Liberal parents in general who are lying to their kids like that.

    My son KNOWS that being nasty, dirty, or sloppy are NOT things that are acceptable for a man. I already have him do the basic grooming stuff like put on Old Spice Deodorant, keep his nails clipped, and a little styling product in his hair for school. I make sure I tell him how important being “handsome and well-groomed” is.

    Like


  74. “That’s why I don’t get why guys need a blog, a community, seminars, and a bunch of books to figure this out.”

    Simple, most guys like me where raised in single mother homes, when you asked about women…she said “you’re a good catch, just be yourself”….which doesn’t prepare you for the games women play…

    Like


  75. on November 23, 2009 at 5:45 pm Doyourownresearch

    POF

    I’ve been “slutting” for nine or so years now. I think it’s safe to say I know what I’m doing.

    Damn, long time for a harlot, don’t you think? You’ve been tested? Don’t get me wrong, I like loose females, they are fun to have around. Would I take them serious? Hell no. Have fun with these kind 🙂

    Like


  76. Don’t forget to change the locks! The psycho ones will let themselves in.

    Like


  77. @Purple999

    Years ago, I too had a few episodes in which I spent 24-48 hours without speaking to my wife. It sucked, because neither of us were happy with the silence, but we were too stubborn to give in.

    I’ve learned something much better. Dominate her physically (but playfully). You don’t need to talk (hence, you are not giving in), but you will get her so riled up that the ice will melt. She will fight and resist, but keep wrestling her playfully as long as it takes for her to yield (my woman normally breaks within 30 seconds). She will be overcome with laughter and feelings of affection, and you won’t spend hours living in needless tension. Don’t drag out the silence. Cut to the chase: it always leads to an improved mood, and it often leads to hot sex.

    Like


  78. Doyourownresearch,

    No, I never get tested.

    I prefer to have my crotchal region to be a grab bag of biological magic.

    …I wish sarcasm traveled better through text.

    Like


  79. on November 23, 2009 at 6:56 pm Wendy Schwartz

    ….And of course I’d strike down with an unholy vengeance upon any women who tried to take his money, marry him without a prenup, or who looks like she’d get fat, old, and lazy after a few years……

    Like


  80. @ Poetry of Flesh

    “and I have standards.”

    What’s your definition of “standards” because from what I’ve read on your blog it’s quite different from mine.

    Like


  81. Tarl–

    We need Dave From Hawaii to contribute the married / living with her version of “how to pull out of a beta nosedive”. It’s hard to cut off contact if she lives with you, and there’s all the more opportunity for her to notice beta backsliding if she’s always around.

    He’s already done it and Roissy’s collected some of the highlights in one of Roissy’s Relationship Game Week posts. Google to find. Oh hell, here:

    http://roissy.wordpress.com/2009/08/14/relationship-game-week-a-readers-journey/

    Like


  82. Half way in my memorable relationship with a nut job I just did it by attrition. Since I often enjoyed life more without her, I stopped fixing it. She of course always came back whimpering. The only problem is they get their own fixes as I later found out during a 2 week period it took to break her. That is a little hole in the plan if its a woman you actually want.

    Like


  83. “I don’t get why guys need a blog, a community, seminars, and a bunch of books to figure this out.”

    Which shows how little you understand men. They just do, okay?

    Men tend to think linearly and in terms of cause and effect, none of which prepares them for dealing with most women (who think circularly and in terms of emotional reinforcement).

    On the whole, neither sex is remotely interested in parity or fairness, both want to rig the system in their favor while tying down the other to a bunch of loathesome restrictions.

    In an age when parents don’t try to arrange marriages for their daughters and easy divorce, women don’t have to understand men much (I’m not sure if women in the past did, but they were much better than modern western women at predicting male behavior in any given circumstance).

    On the other hand, women do the chosing in terms of sexual partners, this means that men need to understand women better (moreso than any time in the past when what most men believed about women was a combination of willful ignorance and wishful thinking).

    To the extent that the kind of stuff Roissy and others help guys rid themselves of women-repelling characteristics, they’re doing the lord’s own work. The snihilistic leave-no-hole-unpenetrated ethos is a regretable side product which most men have sense enough to avoid (and a lot of the LTR advice is guaranteed to fail with many or most women who are still vaguely aware that fling and LTR material are two circles with only the tiniest bit of overlap).

    Like


  84. Sweetheart,

    Since you’ve read my blog, you should know what they are.

    And, yes, my life experiences have led me to have rather different ideas of what is desirable in a man. Which is why I don’t date often, but instead keep a few lovers. I’m not going to go chaste waiting for that rare man that suits.

    Like


  85. Jamila–

    @Poetry of Flesh–I’m a woman, but if you’re a white woman I don’t think your slutting will hurt you with men either. It seems like no matter how much slutting it up white women may do, they always seem to be able to get married in the end.

    It will definitely respect the range of men she can attract for marriage. This won’t seem apparent in dating or even non marriage LTR’s, cause they’re low financial risk.

    A good part of Poetry’s answer was that she hides it well. That’s indicative in itself of how she really feels about how it would affect her chances.

    There’s no doubt that feminism and to a considerable extent the feminist influenced entertainment media is trying to propagandize men in Poetry’s direction. There’s also no doubt that men are highly resistant to that when it comes to LTR’s and especially marriage. However a lot of men do kid themselves and are too easily deceived.

    Changing that is something else Roissy and the Roissysphere are contributing towards.

    I have before, and again do now, urge men to hire a PI to investigate a potential fiance’s past sluttiness or not, if they haven’t gotten real good at being able to tell.

    The single best tell though is, does she adore you? No, not “love you”. That’s wholly insufficient. ADORE you. Is she crazy, really crazy about you? Irrationally besotted?

    If not, don’t marry her. She’s either settling way to low to be fully happy, or a past slut with dulled bonding ability, or both.

    Like


  86. on November 23, 2009 at 6:42 pm Doyourownresearch

    POF,

    You have heard of cervical cancer right? You go girrrll heh heh. These so-called liberated “ladies” think there are no consequences for loose behavior :). Magic? In your dreams, maybe for the beta’s. Flesh covered in bumps, yummy

    Like


  87. restrict

    too low

    Like


  88. Doug1,

    “A good part of Poetry’s answer was that she hides it well. That’s indicative in itself of how she really feels about how it would affect her chances.”

    I don’t hide it.

    There seems to be this universal definition of “slut” that is tossed around. Uneducated, easy, low-self-esteem, seeking validation, unsafe in sex practices, unable to control themselves, bad partners, bad parents, carrying STDs, etc.

    I am more than my sexual activity. It does not define me, anymore than any other hobby. If we were to go off of leisure activities as self-defintion, then I’d end up being labelled a bookworm.

    But one activity does not make a person.

    I have a love of sex, much like I have a love of books, of dancing, of writing, of my family, of my friends.

    A man would never have to “investigate” my sexual background because I’m completely open about it, especially before I sleep with someone. I believe in full-knowledge consent, which is more than most men do.

    As for my chances? The best partner I’ve ever had was a man who blew my experience out of the water, and loved that I had the background I did. I am not going to date a man afraid of my history, I am not going to date a man intimidated by my sexuality, or one that doubts my devotion to him.

    I have many flaws, but my sexuality is not numbered among them. Those that think otherwise, that’s fine. But they aren’t for me.

    Like


  89. I’m reading The Mystery Method and one thing he said really struck me, that a woman who is a 10 will have been approached 2000 times by the time she is 24. Even a male 10 may only have a few dozen interactions by that age. A male 5, perhaps less than 10. So, women are much more experienced. Men need guidance.

    Like


  90. Poetry–

    As for my chances? The best partner I’ve ever had was a man who blew my experience out of the water, and loved that I had the background I did. I am not going to date a man afraid of my history, I am not going to date a man intimidated by my sexuality, or one that doubts my devotion to him.

    Yeah and I gave you on your side advice re: him.

    I don’t think you ever made him feel like you really adored him, did you? Or probably even that you could do. I also know what you said the reasons were for your splitting from him, but I’m not gonna talk about that here before you do.

    Like


  91. @ Poetry of Flesh

    I was hoping you would be polite enough to give me a straight definition, since I haven’t had the time nor the interest to dwell deeper into your story.

    The case in point was some sort of date you went on with a man and you proceeded to list all the things he was doing “wrong”, and yet you still took him home with you.

    It seems kind of contradictory to the common definition, you basically lowered yourself and justified it by “Oh.. well.. guys do it all the time!” or “Sex is sex”. You still lowered yourself to him, you can’t be “easy” and still claim you have standards. I mean, I hope we both can agree that the guy didn’t go on a date with Aphrodite that night but you do seem to carry yourself in a “Holier than thou” mindset.

    You play up your promiscuity as “experience” which is something that I don’t agree with. I’m sure there are girls out there less experienced than you who can blow guys away right?

    I think I’m just irritated because you seem to project the guise and graces of a “genius” but with no talent.

    But I pray this is all a misunderstanding.

    Like


  92. “The day will come when you get so good at this that you will throw beta chum in the water just to amuse yourself with her predictable response”

    This is funny 🙂

    Like


  93. A “born again slut” has really no ability to bond, whatsoever, with a man. Therefore she is a poor choice for ANY man. But particularly Betas who lack the dominant, aggressive, A-hole behavior that all women crave and “born again sluts” crave more than other women.

    A woman who fits that criteria is good for casual sex and nothing else. A relationship let alone marriage is a waste of time, and a marriage is a sure-fire ticket to divorce.

    A woman who had multiple Alphas will never be satisfied with anything else, the only reason for her passing interest in a Beta is a desire for marriage, then divorce. She will in any event be revolted by the Beta’s very being, non-Ahole-ish nature, “decent guy persona” and the rest. Including declarations of love, doing nice things, etc.

    Like


  94. on November 23, 2009 at 7:28 pm gunslingergregi

    ””””””She will in any event be revolted by the pussy’s very being, pussy-ish nature, “nice guy persona” and the rest. ””””””

    Cleaned up a little.

    Like


  95. Paul Revere–

    Rob: There is no difference right now. See, Mike, the only difference between giving up and not giving up is if you take her back when she wants to come back. But you can’t do anything to make her want to come back. In fact, you can only do stuff to make her not want to come back.

    No. This is wrong.

    If you aren’t living together, go out with another girl, a hot or at least cute one, and let her see you do it or hear about it, without it seeming like you went out of the way to display that to her. (You don’t have to pretend you were trying to hide it either.) If you are and are pledged monogamously, then flirt with hot girls.

    Check out the link to Dave from Hawaii married game wisdom I provide above.

    If things haven’t gotten to the her leaving stage, there’s other stuff you can do aside from freezing her out as Roissy’s suggested here. Remember Roissy says it’s the simple stupid solution that nearly always works in a positive direction. It’s also not necessarily the best solution if you have learned some relationship game.

    Relationship game is actually pretty easy. It’s the part of game that’s most about unlearning feminist and feminism influenced American entertainment media messages about proper male behavior. Well relationship game is pretty easy if you come to BELIEVE in the importance of it, understand it’s basic concepts and principals, and think it’s right to do. I.e. it’s the easiest version of game to go from truly understanding theory to actually successfully implementing in the field.

    Like


  96. Doug1,

    Yes, you did give me great advice regarding him that helped a good deal, probably saved our relationship before we decided to end it. I’m grateful for that. I did adore him, deeply, and I made it known once we started down the relationship path.

    Sweetheart,

    I’m sorry I come off as elitist to you. I don’t mean to… it’s easier to see if we were face to face, or if you can hear my tones.

    Like


  97. @whiskey

    Can you, or anyone else on here, define a “born again slut” for me?

    I suspect that I might be one, by ya’lls standards anyway, but I’m not quite sure.

    Like


  98. …that’ll teach me to hit “tab”.

    Continuing…

    Sweetheart,

    I went home with that man because his sexual experience level was decent and his preferences ran to my tastes. I wasn’t looking at him for more than a one-nighter or a short series of evening frolic. The comparison I ran, of all the things he was doing wrong, was to illustrate why he was no more than sex-material to me.

    All of us sort men, in one way or another. Usually, it’s “date” or “don’t date”. But I sort into a variety of categories. Classification of men.

    Guys, for the most part, are simply after sex, and we’re supposed to sit here and make them fight for it, dangle, keep them on their toes, extract relationship or financial promises from them. To “give in” is supposed to be a major deal, a woman submitting, saying the man has passed her test and is now allowed between her sheets.

    I don’t like this set-up. It’s not for me.

    I am sure there are many, many girls who have significantly less experience than I do that are better than I am. That’s not surprising. But I have been exposed to a variety of men, which means I’m more able to handle them because I have had experience with men like them in the past.

    Genius? Hardly. I bone up all the time. Foot in my mouth, sleep with a guy I want to have as a regular too soon, make misjudgements or brash judgements. Without Doug1’s advice, I probably would’ve lost (sooner) the first guy I’ve come across in years that actually lived up to what I want in a man.

    But mistakes get made. It’s how we learn. I’m willing to fall flat on my face, get up, take a step back, examine, and leap again, getting a little closer each time.

    If you want my standards, though, you’re going to have to give me a category. What I expect out of a one-night stand is not what I expect out of a lover which is not what I expect out of a boyfriend, and all those little stages inbetween.

    Hope that makes sense and that I did not continue to come off as another snotty ice-princess slut. I try not to. The guys here occasionally get my hackles up.

    Like


  99. I teased out my favourite comments below:

    Roissy:The beauty of this solution to revive a dying relationship is that even those rare times when she does not reinitiate contact you will have saved yourself time and energy dating a woman who was likely to dump you soon anyhow.

    Master Dogen:Women don’t consciously screen out betas. They do it because they can’t help it.

    Talleyrand:Being elusive is always good for any man, at any time.

    Wendy Schwartz:It works the same with both sexes.

    Like


  100. Poetry–

    I don’t think it’s the case that NO reformed sluts can strongly bond, as the ever cartoonish Whiskey has it just above.

    I think that only a small percentage can. I think your self awareness and other things about you make it more likely that you can than that most.

    I do like you.

    Like


  101. Poetry–

    Guys, for the most part, are simply after sex

    I’m not.

    I’ve always loved the company of girls. Well of some girls. Smart, sexy, feisty but ultimately vulnerable girls especially.

    However, just sex IS also attractive to me, and I am or have been pretty promiscuous at times. My count is considerably higher than yours, but then I’m considerably older and I also have an utterly unapologetic double standard in this area. Goes to a core sex difference.

    Like


  102. Wow Roissy, you should write a book. This advice is 100% correct. Beautiful advice man.

    Like


  103. I dated a “reformed slut” for about 6 months in my more desperate beta days. It’s true, you can’t fix them. She played into the nice girl persona quite well, even became somewhat religious(LOL??) as I always called her out on her bitchiness, bad behavior, prescription drug abuse, and bad attitude. She pulled the marriage card and that was too much for me, so everything went downhill from there. Eventually she ended up cheating on me and she instantly morphed back into the same slutty, annoying depressed chick I met at day 1.

    Like


  104. #
    Dkt

    “You know I am really wracking my brain trying to remember a single instance when I gained some meaningful insight into the machinations of the female mind from the women on this blog.

    Women, why are you here? I don’t want you. Does anyone see any value here? It just seems like half baked bullshit ideas and rhetoric designed to confuse us.”

    The only value the female posters hold is that they are prime examples of female sophistry and thinking. Never take their advice (unless celibacy seems like fun to you) but take note of their half baked bullshit and confusing rhetoric because it is an indication of what truly goes on in their heads and why reason is a waste of time when dealing with women.

    #
    on November 23, 2009 at 5:04 pm Rollo Tomassi

    “There is nothing more simultaneously frightening and arousing to a woman than a Man self-aware enough to acknowledge his own value to women.

    It is for this reason he must be ridiculed, demonized, marginalized and shamed for recognizing his own worth as a commodity by women to put him back into his previously unconscious position. Casting doubt is a woman’s last resort.”

    Good point Rollo.
    People don’t like to see a person change. And women especially like men to be pigeonholed The more you strive to change yourself the more manginas, women and weak alphas will try and hold you back. Women are the the most dangerous. They will shame you, undermine you etc. This applies to all avenues of self improvement.

    Women need to know who is alpha and who is beta. If you try and move from the latter to the former they will try and hold you back.

    NEVER FORGET THIS

    OmegaDork

    “I’m reading The Mystery Method and one thing he said really struck me, that a woman who is a 10 will have been approached 2000 times by the time she is 24. Even a male 10 may only have a few dozen interactions by that age. A male 5, perhaps less than 10. So, women are much more experienced. Men need guidance.”

    Mystery is right in essence. Girls become sexually attractive at a younger age than men. A sixteen year old girl is attractive to all guys from the start of puberty until they die. A sixteen year old boy is not very attractive to most women (including 16 year old girls). Women thus gain more sexual experience earlier than men, on average.

    I think Mystery may have been wrong though about 10s. I wonder how often 10s are actually approached. How many of you would approach a 10? I’ll bet none of you. You’d all approach less hotter but easier girls. A 10 is a beautiful girl and most guy see her as out of their league and instead approach the 8 across the room. Thus I’d wager that a 10 is actually approached far less than you all imagine.

    Like


  105. Doug1,

    You know, I don’t know… I think any reformed sluts. At least not ones that will admit it. I mean, sure, you’ve got the wild hippie girls from the flower power era that have settled down and raised a family (hi mom!) but I don’t know many girls in my generation that have done it. It’d be interesting to see the emotional bonding ability they, in general, have with their male partners. I know I’m a giant softie, but I’m an admitted oddball.

    And I like you as well, even with your dratted double standard.

    Makes me glad that someone here has a count higher than mine. I was beginning to get concerned about the success rate of the guys here.

    No wonder you could give me such good advice in dealing with my latest.

    Like


  106. @ Poetry of Flesh

    I mean standards as in what does it take for you to take a guy home? Sometimes it just seems like you’re a “O.K you have a pulse, you’ll do” or a “O.K I’m going to quiz you about sex then if I like what I hear, I’ll take you home” type of woman.

    I just can’t picture you having any LTR, maybe I agree to that whole stereotype that “Free Spirited” girls can’t land a husband or hold a boyfriend for long, or that they usually end in ruin.

    Guys have this weird honor system about women. They will fool around with the easy sexually liberated girl but they usually end up marrying the innocent “Girl Next Door”. How do you feel about this?

    Don’t think I’m a white knight judging you or anything, my name’s Sebastian and I’m far from a saint, I’ve dwelled in drugs, sluts and breaking hearts in my “Hedonistic” youth. I’ve stopped using drugs but I can’t run away from the other two, they are unavoidable.

    I’m glad we could clear up the conceitedness dispute though.

    Like


  107. on November 23, 2009 at 8:41 pm Doyourownresearch

    POF

    Good for you cupcake… Hey I’m fully aware females parade their sluttiness around like a badge of honor 🙂 but let’s call a spade a spade.

    I have nothing against your behavior… at least you are completely open and honest about it.

    Speaking of history, it seems to me you know nothing about commitment. When someone is swinging from one man to the next, this person knows nothing about commitment. That’s why I say, have fun don’t take a chick like this serious for a relationship much less marriage. But that’s ok with me. Do what you gotta do sweet cheeks.

    Like


  108. The problem with this kind of strategy is that it induces a selection effect.

    Much that falls under the label “Game” is effective on all girls – charm, wit, confidence, etc. These are all almost universally attractive qualities. But there is also a subset of behaviours that play to the insecurities and baser tendencies of the archtypal 2009 twenty-something urban faux-playette with daddy issues.

    The freeze-out tactic advocated in this post, while effective on the latter, would be perceived as rude and unattractive by a higher-quality girl. Or, to say the exact same thing the other way around, any girl who makes a habit of cutting off contact with guys who run asshole game on them, is a high-quality girl.

    So I’ll second this advice for the man whose goal is easy vag with hot girls, and nothing more. But for a man looking to maintain a harem of sexually liberated future-cat-zookeepers, while keeping an eye open for the rare hot, confident girl of good character with whom he can someday build something more substantial with – take it with a grain of salt.

    Cheers,

    Zdeno

    Like


  109. on November 23, 2009 at 8:54 pm msexceptiontotherule

    “gunslingergregi
    ””””’When I’m driving, and my old lady starts telling me to watch out for such and such, I literally tell her to shut the fuck up. ””””””’

    I just leave her on the side of the road and make her hitch hike back home.”

    That’s why it’s always a good idea to take separate cars everywhere. Don’t want to get stuck having to hitch in high heels on the highway – it’s also recommended to have a weapon with you anytime you leave the house. Just got my concealed weapons permit too!

    Like


  110. Well, if I had to hide from a woman, the only logical place is to go swallow my head ( or my dick ).

    Like


  111. Fuck you Roissy. This works and it’s so aggravating!!

    Like


  112. I think Mystery may have been wrong though about 10s. I wonder how often 10s are actually approached. How many of you would approach a 10? I’ll bet none of you. You’d all approach less hotter but easier girls. A 10 is a beautiful girl and most guy see her as out of their league and instead approach the 8 across the room. Thus I’d wager that a 10 is actually approached far less than you all imagine.

    -Breeze

    Yes, I have found this to be true. However, I’m not going to claim having had a “10” for myself because that is an elusive standard. I have been with some extraordinary women — the kinds who get catcalled while I’m walking with them in plain view on the street (very annoying and lacking in class, but the girls always seem to enjoy it, or at least find it benignly annoying).

    For me, the better looking the woman the lower my inhibitions about approaching her, but it seems the opposite for many other men. Perhaps this is because I simply have a difficult time doing the deed if a woman isn’t above a certain attractiveness threshold.

    I am actually far more beta and bashful around women who are borderline attractive than I am with those for whom there is no doubt as to their allure. I don’t know whether this is good or bad, but I can say that lately it hasn’t done me any good, because there aren’t all that many fine women in my neighborhood — it’s more granola and hipster here.

    Maybe I should just get back in shape, bite the bullet, and go to where the truly beautiful ones hang out, even if I do have to get off my ass and drive a ways.

    Like


  113. Check it out: Alpha kills presumable Beta for his wife, kids and money!

    http://www.dailypress.com/news/dp-local_dravensentence_1118nov18,0,5538623.story

    Killer got the Wife help him do it too (she got four life terms for her ‘ho-ishness).

    Like


  114. Sweetheart,

    I mean standards as in what does it take for you to take a guy home?

    For sex, it really varies on my mood… but I’m a woman, so I suppose that’s considered acceptable. Sometimes I want friendly, casual, slow sex. I go to regulars for that, or the boy-next-door types. They’re sweet, they’ve got some experience, they’ve got some brains. They need to be open enough to accept who I am, and they need to accept that I’m more experienced than they are without getting a chip on their shoulder. I don’t want to spend time having a guy strut around in front of me, trying to prove himself. But sometimes I want incredibly objectifying sex. I find a smart, attractive man with a cocky attitude and I push his buttons until I end up bent over the back of his couch. I don’t need him to respect me, I don’t need to connect with him, but I do need him to be taller than I am, stronger than I am. I don’t care about his attitude, his mindset, I’m never going to see him again, most likely, because it’s rare to find men that do the objectifying sex without actually losing respect for their partner if they don’t lead them in some intricate crapfest of a social/sexual dance, and I have other things to do than play coy. Most other times, I enjoy the D/s. But it’s hard to find a good, experienced dom that I can respect and trust. So that’s much more rare and has a great deal more “requirements” they have to meet. Which, if you’ve ever played at all, don’t really need to be explained.

    I just can’t picture you having any LTR, maybe I agree to that whole stereotype that “Free Spirited” girls can’t land a husband or hold a boyfriend for long, or that they usually end in ruin.

    I’ve been in a few LTRs, actually. Lived with two men (at seperate times, thank you), totally devoted to them. Never cheated. Never strayed. Never even thought of cheating. I would currently be in a LTR, as Doug1 and I discussed, if I had been able to accept my partner’s need for a sexually open relationship (alpha males will drive you nuts, really). But I’m monogamous. I can’t deal with it on an emotional level… just not in my nature.

    Guys have this weird honor system about women. They will fool around with the easy sexually liberated girl but they usually end up marrying the innocent “Girl Next Door”. How do you feel about this?

    Alternately annoyed and amused. But, really, when it comes down to it, those are socially standard males. I’m not socially standard. If a man is still stuck on that honor system, we’re likely not going to be compatible, not even counting my sexual background. I’m not going to begrudge them their choices, but you’ve probably seen yourself that when the standard male is shacking up with a girl like me, he isn’t always the most polite of creatures. Even basic social interactions, like you see here, are generally verbal assaults simply because of the lifestyle I lead. They don’t take it as what it could be, at a bare minimum: pleasure and education. Instead it becomes this rude, character revealing moral diatribe. Annoying.

    I’ve stopped using drugs but I can’t run away from the other two, they are unavoidable.

    I’m surprised you’re not going by Valmont (as your SN), personally. Much loved character. I try not to break hearts, but I do.

    I’m a fan of clearing misunderstandings. I’m a sweet girl, I just love to do dirty things.

    Like


  115. http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2009/nov/22/working-women-husbands-housework

    how NOT to revive a flagging relationship: bitch out your spouse so you can feel more feminine.

    Like


  116. on November 23, 2009 at 9:27 pm gunslingergregi

    ””””””””’msexceptiontotherule
    “gunslingergregi
    ””””’When I’m driving, and my old lady starts telling me to watch out for such and such, I literally tell her to shut the fuck up. ””””””’

    I just leave her on the side of the road and make her hitch hike back home.”

    That’s why it’s always a good idea to take separate cars everywhere. Don’t want to get stuck having to hitch in high heels on the highway – it’s also recommended to have a weapon with you anytime you leave the house. Just got my concealed weapons permit too!
    ””””””””””””
    Well no I wouldn’t leave her without a weapon to defend herself. What kind of animal do you think I am?

    Be a good girl and there won’t be any problems he he he

    Like


  117. on November 23, 2009 at 9:33 pm Dave from Hawaii

    Tarl – This one is easy for a married/live in man to “cut off all contact.”

    It’s as simple as “I’m going hunting this weekend. See ya when I get back.”

    Or Fishing.

    Or whatever hobby you do with your guy friends that involves escaping from civilization, out or of reach of the nearest cell phone tower’s connection range.

    You don’t have a hobby or recreational activity you do with your guy friends?

    Time to get one.

    And if she gets upset, angry or tries to throw a fit or forbid you to go when you TELL her your plans? All the better when she realizes after you really left in spite her dramatic protestations…deep down she’ll begrudgingly respect the fact that she can’t control you with her emotional tirade.

    Like


  118. Jamila, don’t set us back 50 years via this blog.

    Like


  119. @ Krauser

    2 years ago i hooked up with a virgin air hostess from the uk when she was here on a trip (to sydney)… 9+

    My game has always been real simple… bold asshole with hint of sensitivity…

    When she returned to the uk she texted saying we had unfinished business, so I took that as cue to ramp it up a bit and began describing all the things I’d like to do to her the next time I saw her. Fairly explicitly, too.

    She responded in kind & that continued back n forth for 2 months or so until she finally requested another trip to Oz. There’s probably no potential for LTR but she’s visited 6 or 7 times since & each time has been pretty fuckin’ good.

    I should mention also, I’m hopeless at writing sexual texts or emails so I basically copied scenarios I was reading from the FHM Sexperts – pretty much word-for-word – quite simple.

    Like


  120. Anonymous

    Check it out: Alpha kills presumable Beta for his wife, kids and money!

    http://www.dailypress.com/news/dp-local_dravensentence_1118nov18,0,5538623.story

    Killer got the Wife help him do it too (she got four life terms for her ‘ho-ishness).

    What kind of “Alpha” plots to kill a man so he can get the wife who looks like this?

    Killers.

    Victim.

    Like


  121. “Poetry–

    Guys, for the most part, are simply after sex”

    Wrong.

    Guys have the ability to love one woman and f*ck a lot of them at the same time. A man’s heart only has space for a woman. A man’s penis has space for a crowd.

    I don’t expect you to get it, because love and sex are mixed in women but men are able to love. In fact, their love is stronger than women’s.

    All of this is explained by evolutionary psychology but I am feeling lazy tonight

    Like


  122. dipped in shit

    Jamila, don’t set us back 50 years via this blog.

    If she sent your people back 10 years you’d be milking goats and living in a grass and mud hut.

    Oh wait……………

    Like


  123. wimpy willard waked up from a debetic coma after eating the chocolate peen on LR’s blog to utter….

    … If she sent your people back 10 years you’d be milking goats and living in a grass and mud hut.

    Oh wait…

    Said he whose one room rusty tin shack came with an outhouse that can be smelled 5 miles away.

    Like


  124. on November 23, 2009 at 10:32 pm Doyourownresearch

    “lifestyle I lead”

    aaah euphemisms, I like those too…

    do as you wish… these types of women, who don’t have bonding potential, hey I like. Who doesn’t like joint sexual pleasure? But don’t get attached to something that has commitment issues. I’m getting what I want and you are getting what you want. Always remember, you can tell allot about a person when it comes to behavior patterns. 🙂

    Like


  125. dipped in shit

    Said he whose one room rusty tin shack came with an outhouse that can be smelled 5 miles away.

    That’s a McMansion back in your homeland.

    Like


  126. roissy, why couldnt you write this yesterday

    good shit though

    Like


  127. Women are simple. Simply evil. Approach them from that frame and all the pieces drop into place. Project evil and they will come to you. Like attracts like.

    Like


  128. poetry of flesh, “Just as unlikely as you ever addressing your quite obvious issues. “

    Typical delusional female reply: when confronted by the unvarnished truth about how they’ve screwed up their lives: it’s someone else who has issues that need “fixing.” Let me guess: you have 2 cats, a gay best friend and you hate your dad, right? I know, I know, making people face the truth about themselves is kind of mean, but when you attempt to console yourself with lame self delusion like,

    “If a man … is unable to be comfortable in his own sexuality, then he isn’t high quality.”

    -I mean, what can anyone with a speck of common sense say to that? It’s your sexual incontinence which any sane heterosexual man will find disturbing. This has nothing to do with him being “comfortable in his own sexuality.” It’s just the sort of common sense which impels sane men to avoid shacking up with women who cut themselves or have track marks on their arms. I mean, gawd bless ya for lowering the market price for Lucy’s hookers, and if it makes you happy, more power to you. But it decreases your sexual market value just as surely as being fat or getting a facial tattoo would.

    You need not concern yourself with Brother Lupo’s advances: I avoid Angelinos; y’awl have the herpes.

    Like


  129. “” Women are simple. Simply evil. Approach them from that frame and all the pieces drop into place. Project evil and they will come to you. Like attracts like. “”

    LOL !

    I know a guy that has marginal “game” at best, yet he is dating a chick that physically at least is a solid 8 to a 9.
    Yet as far as personality and character traits go they are suited as like attracts like.

    She basially made a (drunken) move on him and he obliged.

    Both are selfish , self-centred, mercenary in their interactions with others and while he is out to srew her physically , in the long term she will no doubt screw him financially and emotionally.

    Basially they are cut from the same cloth and deserve each other.

    Like


  130. Phthalates are one of the culptits.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phthalate

    Like


  131. ^ make that culprits

    Like


  132. @chic noir

    You are making me miss blogging so much! But I just don’t have the time for it right now. You can see some of the stuff I’ve written here and here.

    @Poetry of Flesh

    According to many of the men here, if you (or any woman for that matter) doesn’t feel bad about not being a virgin or married then you are obviously repressed and have childhood issues. I think some of the men here have such a deep-seated aversion to promiscous women because its the same feeling that is aroused by men when they feel a woman is intruding on their male territory, your’re confiscating their last bastion of male privilege–the right to be a whore!

    Men don’t like women invading male only spaces and the right to be uninhibited with whomever you choose is definitely male territory in their eyes.

    Like


  133. on November 24, 2009 at 12:41 am unlearning genius

    @Poetry of Flesh

    “I’ve had a few guys try to do this to me. It’s only worked once.
    With the rest of them, it was simply a relief to have one less drain on my time. ”

    I am beginning to like you! Kind of see your allure.

    Like


  134. “According to many of the men here, if you (or any woman for that matter) doesn’t feel bad about not being a virgin or married then you are obviously repressed and have childhood issues. I think some of the men here have such a deep-seated aversion to promiscous women because its the same feeling that is aroused by men when they feel a woman is intruding on their male territory, your’re confiscating their last bastion of male privilege–the right to be a whore!
    Men don’t like women invading male only spaces and the right to be uninhibited with whomever you choose is definitely male territory in their eyes.”

    No, guys here tell it like it is :

    Alot of men will f*ck a whore but few will marry her.

    the “sexually liberated” woman don’t dare broadcast their liberation to the masses least they’d be scene as a whore.

    Like


  135. @ Phenomenal One
    Alot of men will f*ck a whore but few will marry her.

    I believe this and doubt few will dispute it. However, since 86% of white women will eventually get married and something like 99% of Latinas I think its safe to assume that most whores will indeed get married eventually.

    Some whores do very well for themselves, broadcasting their whorishness for all to see….see Madonna and this blogger, a white, married, female with a Ph.D and child.

    Like


  136. Ooops, when I wrote “this blogger” in my previous quote I mean’t to provide a link to a blogger’s site known as Bitch Ph.D. She’s married, has a Ph.D, a child, and a husband who doesn’t stop her whoring.

    Like


  137. This is one game maneuver I do know well and have used to good effect. As always Dave gives valuable LTR spin on the advice. Dave’s last paragraph is key: never give in to the emotional tirade.

    Like


  138. on November 24, 2009 at 1:04 am Phenomenal One

    “assume that most whores will indeed get married eventually.

    Some whores do very well for themselves, broadcasting their whorishness for all to see….see Madonna and this blogger, a white, married, female with a Ph.D and child.”

    of course there are always exceptions but not everyone can be the exception.

    Like


  139. What about flakes who don’t return calls on day 2? I had one recently, so I just left a last v-mail saying the the 3rd time was either a charm or a strikeout.

    Typing that out, I realize that was pretty beta. OTOH I deleted her from my contacts list because I figure it’s only upside from here on out.

    Like


  140. Poetry of Flesh: “Guys, for the most part, are simply after sex, and we’re supposed to sit here and make them fight for it, dangle, keep them on their toes, extract relationship or financial promises from them. To “give in” is supposed to be a major deal, a woman submitting, saying the man has passed her test and is now allowed between her sheets.

    I don’t like this set-up. It’s not for me.”

    “Foot in my mouth, sleep with a guy I want to have as a regular too soon”

    You are aware the second quote contradicts the first right?

    Anyway, I for one am looking for more than sex. However, it is very rare to meet a woman worth more than sex.

    Like


  141. on November 24, 2009 at 2:33 am msexceptiontotherule

    “gunslingergregi
    Well no I wouldn’t leave her without a weapon to defend herself. What kind of animal do you think I am?

    Be a good girl and there won’t be any problems he he he”

    Define “good”. And just because you’re the philanthropist/good-will-ambassador motivational speaker for us doesn’t mean you don’t have any evil ways! You say you’d leave a weapon for defense with a lady, but that could just mean you’d let her have a slingshot and some rocks. Or a gun with just one bullet.

    Choices. Lots and lots of choices.

    Like


  142. @D

    1. Don’t leave voicemail. Or leave the shortest message feasible.

    2. You can consider yourself flaked-upon if she hasn’t called back in 48 hours. Unless:

    – You foolishly called her on a Friday or Saturday, then she has til Monday night
    – Long weekend

    Either way, play er cool, and send a “guess what” txt in *one week*. As in “guess what I saw” or “guess who I saw” txt message, to make her curious. Then make something funny/interesting up.

    Like


  143. on November 24, 2009 at 3:36 am gunslingergregi

    Yea ok don’t leave for good just a little scare then roll around to pick em up.

    What test do you think it would be possible to give an american woman so a guy could be more than likely assured that she won’t go buck wild on him later on or that she chooses him not just because of convenience at the time.

    Like


  144. “”Anyway, I for one am looking for more than sex. However, it is very rare to meet a woman worth more than sex.””

    Well, this goes both ways, so, it’s really hard to find a quality guy as well.
    Even today i thought about why a lot of good looking guys don’t attract me, and i realized it has to be this bad and selfish energy that surrounds them, and probably some girls have the same bad vibes.
    today i went to an internetcafe, and in front of me sat a guy with 3 videolive chats open, with different girls, i thought, this guy is completely lacking empathy. he had this oh so common bad energy surrounding him that usually surrounds bad people, even girls. The girls he talked to where ugly, and once started to dress of, wow, big hurray for the girls..
    Some poeple on this blog cannot put themselves in another persons shoes, and that is also a why their game doesn’t work, if they would have empathy, they would have the ability to see the things running their way, and they would be able to use that, instead, they are full of sensitive and hurt feelings and they demand themselves a quality girl, well, but why would they get one if they don’t have any qualities, this is not charity.

    Like


  145. on November 24, 2009 at 4:36 am msexceptiontotherule

    “gunslingergregi
    Yea ok don’t leave for good just a little scare then roll around to pick em up.

    What test do you think it would be possible to give an american woman so a guy could be more than likely assured that she won’t go buck wild on him later on or that she chooses him not just because of convenience at the time.”

    What kind of buck wild are we talking about here?

    And I’m not sure it’s a good idea to have convenience and american women in the same sentence.

    Like


  146. on November 24, 2009 at 4:45 am gunslingergregi

    The crazed maniac during a divorce proceeding.

    Convenience for her situation at the time knowing her situation is going to change.

    Like


  147. on November 24, 2009 at 5:03 am Phenomenal One

    “Some poeple on this blog cannot put themselves in another persons shoes, and that is also a why their game doesn’t work, if they would have empathy, they would have the ability to see the things running their way, and they would be able to use that, instead, they are full of sensitive and hurt feelings and they demand themselves a quality girl, well, but why would they get one if they don’t have any qualities, this is not charity.”

    some people don’t deserve to be shown empathy because they put themselves in certain situations, then except a helping hand.
    empathy is something that should be shown to some people, not everyone.

    Like


  148. on November 24, 2009 at 5:59 am msexceptiontotherule

    “gunslingergregi

    The crazed maniac during a divorce proceeding.

    Convenience for her situation at the time knowing her situation is going to change.”

    Hell if I know, I’ve never been divorced! Being a widow doesn’t exactly give me much for useful information applicable to developing a proper testing strategy to discern potential mania capacity during a life-event which may or may not occur anyway. I suppose you can always use the scorched earth tactic, so that both sides can walk with an equal share of nothing….more or less.

    Like


  149. on November 24, 2009 at 6:05 am Cannon's Canon

    well, off the cuff, i’ve gotta proclaim that i too, like
    Breeze, and
    Dkt
    have never profited from the presence of any female on this comment thread.

    we have fun here with the femmes, for sure. doug probably enjoys them the most.

    but i’m done posturing against him. he spits straight knowledge, in hip hop terms.

    there is still one lingering question though… doug…

    registered Democrat? huh… holler… if ya hear me!

    Like


  150. el chief those back boobs scared the hell out of me.

    Like


  151. on November 24, 2009 at 6:21 am Cannon's Canon

    of course, it’s not very hard to empathize with some female commenters.

    characters like LR and PoF, absent of utility, will occasionally hit the nail on the head when remarking about a post here, because they are, essentially, MEN at heart.

    jamila, this week’s reigning sweetheart, just linked to PANDAGON for a sample of her faceless pedigree of expression.

    there are a few chicks that have kept up their cuteness, and i would bang them. hurrah for them.

    pressingly: why are they here? any fool who takes their advice, even on this board, is a buffoon. i do not believe that these broads are THAT stuck up… i think that they like to consider themselves amongst such esteemed company… it gives them a pass on any bullshit behavior…

    it’s not even that they are sucking the virtual roissy cock… it’s just that they like to see themselves jostle amongst the pro-cro-magnon keyboard meathead-intellectuals.

    lick a finger and flick the bean. john cusack sends you a one-word text? try not to respond, you disingenuous slut-toothed whore-hound mountain-top specie

    Like


  152. A “born again slut” has really no ability to bond, whatsoever, with a man.

    nope

    there are evil sluts, like Poetry, Wendy Schwartz or that Sex and the City harpies wannabes out there who are absolutely unable to bond. The evil slut is the slut who call herself a slut.

    the good slut rationalyzes away her slutiness so that when she is “reborn” (i.e. ages out of the sexual frame of attractive men she desires) she won´t see any transition as far as she is concerned

    Like


  153. Just want to add to this great post.

    If your living with her, make sure your the one to boot her out, rather then be the beta chump sleeping on your mums couch because your lady upset you.

    For added effect, put her stuff in a suit case and lob it out the bedroom window.

    Like


  154. Men that show women empathy are nearly always used by the respective woman to feel good about herself , boost her confidence and ego , get into a good frame of mind and then move on to a guy she actually feels an attraction and interest for.

    The “emathy” guy is then left wondering what went wrong.

    Ladies , empathy is what your girlfriends and moms are for.

    Like


  155. on November 24, 2009 at 7:26 am Phenomenal One

    “Men that show women empathy are nearly always used by the respective woman to feel good about herself , boost her confidence and ego , get into a good frame of mind and then move on to a guy she actually feels an attraction and interest for.
    The “emathy” guy is then left wondering what went wrong.
    Ladies , empathy is what your girlfriends and moms are for.”

    Ugly woman, Fat woman, Broke woman, Single mothers etc.
    i’ve heard the empathy talk from them all, and i’ve never EVER took em seriously or gave a damn.
    Those same woman are always talkin about how they deserve the top guy, why ?…who cares why they’ll just shout it from the rooftops whenever they get the chance.

    Will they split the money or will one of them steal it ?

    Like


  156. on November 24, 2009 at 7:26 am gunslingergregi

    ””””””I suppose you can always use the scorched earth tactic, so that both sides can walk with an equal share of nothing….more or less.”””””’

    Yea scorched earth would be the way to go with an absense of the ability to be reasonable and go talk to god about it.

    Like


  157. I’m a sweet girl, I just love to do dirty things.

    So sick of watching pretty girls doing ugly things

    😉

    Like


  158. but i’m done posturing against him. he spits straight knowledge, in hip hop terms.

    “Yuum.”

    Ya herd?

    Like


  159. @Cannon’s Cannon

    I’m guessing you didn’t read what I actually wrote.

    And I think Wendy Schwartz is the sweetheart of this week. I haven’t taken her spot….yet…

    Like


  160. One thing I immediately noticed when I started reading game sites was the close relationship between seduction strategy and military strategy although I bet neither side knows much about the other. A lot of what game is can be understood by looking at the OODA-Loop concept developed by Col. John Boyd. Robert Greene from the blog Power, Seduction and War describes it like this:

    OODA stands for Observation, Orientation, Decision, Action. A pilot is constantly going through these loops or cycles in a dogfight: he tries to observe the enemy as best he can, this observation being somewhat fluid, since nothing is standing still and all of this is happening at great speed. With a lightning-quick observation, he then must orient this movement of the enemy, what it means, what are his intentions, how does it fit into the overall battle. This is the critical part of the cycle. Based on this orientation, he makes a decision as to how to respond, and then takes the appropriate action.

    In the course of a typical dogfight, a pilot will go through maybe a dozen or so of these loops, depending on how complicated the fight, and how fluid the field. If one pilot can make faster decisions and actions, based on the proper observations and orientations, he slowly gains a distinct advantage. He can make a maneuver to confuse the enemy. After a few such maneuvers in which he is slightly ahead in the cycles, the enemy makes a mistake, and he is able to go in for the kill. Boyd calls these fast transients, and if you are ahead in these transients, the opponent slowly loses touch with reality. He cannot decipher what you are doing, and as he becomes increasingly cut off from the reality of the battlefield, he reacts to things that are not there, and his misreactions spell his death.

    Substitute the pilot with an Alpha, the enemy fighter with his female prey, and death with getting banged, and you will see how closely these two concepts, OODA-Loops and Game, match. For another comparison look at how Roissy describes higher game in his post above:

    Like aural bullets of shit tests flying at you from all directions, your Neo Game will slow time and warp space, stopping her shit tests in front of you, which you then send right back at her with double the force. A master of female psychology (MFP) is indistinguishable from a clairvoyant, predicting women’s actions before they have happened based on nothing more than a well-developed understanding of a woman’s animal nature.

    And here is Col. John Boyd on operating with the enemies OODA Loops:

    It’s like they’re moving in slow motion and you’re commanding both sides

    These two concepts have a lot in common to say the least.

    Like


  161. When I put a particular woman on ice, she contacts me back. When I try to talk to her, she is unresponsive. This totally works.

    It just worked a few minutes ago for me.

    Like


  162. Its just social psychology 101. The one who wants the relationship least holds the power and they win the game of chicken. The price of this power is to love less.

    Like


  163. finsalscollons,

    I don’t expect you to get it, because love and sex are mixed in women but men are able to love. In fact, their love is stronger than women’s.

    All of this is explained by evolutionary psychology but I am feeling lazy tonight.

    I’m aware of evo-psych theory, you don’t need to explain it. And, yes, I understand how it applies. But if you sit a man down and offer him immediate gratification or potential for getting to know a girl over a longer period of time, waiting for sex, they generally go for the former. Amusingly, I’ve tested this in the past.

    But, yes, that’s why I qualified my statement with “for the most part”. Because it’s very obviously not universally true.

    Lupo,

    Typical delusional female reply: when confronted by the unvarnished truth about how they’ve screwed up their lives: it’s someone else who has issues that need “fixing.” Let me guess: you have 2 cats, a gay best friend and you hate your dad, right?”

    Aw, you sent that right back at me. Your issues don’t -need- fixing, senor. I just felt like pointing out that if you’re rubbing my issues in my face, you should probably look to your own first. I have one cat that lives with my parents (possibly the most incompetent cat in existence), two best friends (one male, one female, both straight), and I love my father. Keep trying.

    “It’s your sexual incontinence which any sane heterosexual man will find disturbing. This has nothing to do with him being comfortable in his own sexuality.”

    Actually, in my experience, it very much does. And you might wish to re-read my previous statement regarding high quality men. You know, the one where I said that my idea of high quality is not the same as Roissy’s. Or yours, for that matter. Which is great, because you’re not dictating who I date or sleep with.

    Jamila,

    “Men don’t like women invading male only spaces and the right to be uninhibited with whomever you choose is definitely male territory in their eyes.”

    It’s part of the issue, yes. I find many of the men I sleep with are initially intimidated by me, even if they don’t admit it. It makes them uncomfortable to know that they’re the inexperienced party out of the two of us.

    But there’s also the evo-psych argument that many of the guys here will bring up and that I usually agree with. It’s not a good idea for a woman to sleep around. It’s easier for us to catch STDs, we lower our value through our behavior, it inspires feelings of lack of security that we may stray and cuckold our partner, along with a variety of other things that you’ll catch here every day.

    Unlearning genius,

    “I am beginning to like you! Kind of see your allure.”

    Masculine dandy, high-five across the internet.

    Breeze,

    “You are aware the second quote contradicts the first right?

    Anyway, I for one am looking for more than sex. However, it is very rare to meet a woman worth more than sex.”

    Actually, it doesn’t. The objectifying sex comes from men that are only going to be one-night stands. The second they start to like you or respect you, the sex becomes more intimate, more gentle, they’re more concerned for your wellbeing and that you’re enjoying yourself.

    It’s the nicer guys that you have to be careful with. Balancing between getting them to know you and respect you, but also not drawing out a complicated social dance that lasts for months where they end up wanting more.

    I’m also looking for more than sex. However, I think it is going to be a long while before I find a man that I am willing to enter into a relationship with. If I found him tomorrow, I’d cease my slutting immediately, no question.

    Gig,

    “there are evil sluts, like Poetry, Wendy Schwartz or that Sex and the City harpies wannabes out there who are absolutely unable to bond. The evil slut is the slut who call herself a slut.”

    What’s it like, living in a soap opera?

    Tupac,

    There’s no speakers on this computer. I’ll have to wait until later to listen to your song.

    Like


  164. “NO CONTACT ZONE”
    works on me EVERYTIME! even though i am fully AWARE that is precisely what is going on!

    Like


  165. Jamila

    @Firepower re:white women

    “this is a great observation, but dont forget by the time they hit 22, black women sluts always have 4 kids so its a matter of using birth control. no guy will marry a 23 year old slut with 6 kids”

    Only rarely do they have that many kids. My experience is that they have one or two kids, and two or three abortions under their belts.

    sorry– i thought black women usually had four kids before age 24. . 2 kids at age 22 and four abortions is cool.

    Like


  166. on November 24, 2009 at 2:58 pm Wendy Schwartz

    Once again, way to try to make everything women do into “an evil plot”. I have never seen Sex in the City because I hate those femmo-bonding shows.

    Not all women are either “trying to be an empowered slut” or “trying to be a reformed slut”. We don’t REALLY talk about our sexual exploits with our girlfriends, nor do I recall ever even having talked to my own sister about “sexual details” of my life.

    There is no such thing as a slut simply because neither men nor women are naturally meant to be monogamous. Sex is meant for reproduction and for entertainment. Nothing more and nothing less. The AMOUNT of sex you do (or do not) have has nothing to do with what kind of “man” or “woman” you are. It has to do with anthropological influence and fucking nature itself.

    My point being that a lot of you men seem to believe that women are either “trying to sleep around and act all empowered” or are “sleeping around to gain something or take something from a man”.

    Most of the time we are sleeping around because it’s fun. We do it because we can. Or because we like to. Like a rollercoaster or a Haunted House. But it has nothing to do with “whether you’re a quality man/woman or not”.

    Like


  167. poetry of flesh did say, “Which is great, because you’re not dictating who I date or sleep with.”

    Man, PoF, you’re like this week’s Wendy Schwartz. Yes, we know that nobody tells the likes of you who you sleep with. That’s kind of the point: that’s why any self respecting man (let’s use “self respecting” as a proxy for “high quality” we can all agree on) should use you like a qtip and move on.

    Seriously folks; if anyone wants a textbook case of “females to avoid” -go have a look at this ding a ling’s blog. You’ll find all kinds of fun stuff: her cockteasing her beta male friends, then getting mad at them when they don’t know their place, her slutting it up in a mad conga line of Los Angeles nightclub peen, her acting like a first rate cunt in order to provoke angry men into fucking her harder, her crying alone in her apartments with her cats and bon bons. Wendy Schwartz is a sad old harpy, but at least she’s somewhat a victim of circumstance. This one made herself this way. I also note while she claims to be a daddy’s girl, she didn’t fall all over herself trying to deny she has herpes.

    Like


  168. Fascinating to see the group reaction to PoF. Who knew sluts were so threatening? I thought people would be happy that there were women who put out all the time…certainly makes it easier for men to get sex. Or is it only the “quality” women men want to put out…but only to you…. But if a quality woman succumbs to tepid game, don’t you wonder how many other better gamers got to her first? Is she still quality after you’ve banged her? Might be time to start cruising the high schools for virgins….hmm….better make that junior high.

    And Roissy’s trick is the oldest in the book for either sex. The one who appears to want it less holds the power. So it’s easy to really put it to the ones that like us. And it nicely weeds out the ones who never call back…who wants long-term partners who don’t respond to gaming tactics anyway?

    Like


  169. “Fascinating to see the group reaction to PoF. Who knew sluts were so threatening? I thought people would be happy that there were women who put out all the time…”

    Again, that’s not the way most mens’ psyches work. They want a woman to put out but they want her to not care about the quality of their performance. An experienced woman (who could critique their earnest huffing and humping) is more deadly to their hard-ons than a gay midget scat pornathon.

    Another problem is that most men can’t do simple math. They want to run through a bunch of sluts, pick a nice girl to settle down with and then get back to running through sluts.

    This is a lifestyle that would work if women outnumbered men by about 20 to 1. As it is, with roughly even numbers, the gamers are collectively (by their own admission) ruining lots of women for any kind of LTR and thus leaving lots of men (who don’t want to make getting laid the be all and end all of their lives) with no LTR prospects. That some pretend to have other mens’ interests at heart is a hilarious example of hypocrisy in full flower, especially Roissy’s call for as many men as possible to play the no-attachment numbers game. It makes no numerical sense whatsoever.

    Basically, game as a lifestyle is a Ponzi scheme, which should give you an idea of the character of those who glorify it.

    Like


  170. Cliff,
    Bra skrivet. Szép.

    Like


  171. Lupo,

    I’ve sat here and said flat-out that I sleep around. I’ve owned every act I’ve done without hesitation, without making excuses or justification. I’ve acknowledged that we have different values, different ideas, and been decently polite in addressing your hostile conversation.

    What is it, exactly, that you want from our interactions?

    I’m not going to tell you your concept of reality is correct. Or that your values are universal. I’m not going to lose my temper, nor are you going to chase me off. You’re not going to make me change my behavior, either.

    So tell me, what can I do to gratify you?

    Like


  172. Tack saa mycket.

    Koszonom, csak irtam meg az igazsagot.

    Like


  173. on November 24, 2009 at 6:43 pm Phenomenal One

    I’m still waiting for the woman who are ok with just sleeping around to start shouting it from the rooftops.
    Until then i’ll just keeping laughng at those same woman.

    Like


  174. @PoetryOfFlesh-lupo’s anger with you is symbolic. Nothing more nothing less.

    Like


  175. whenever bikky speaks Hungarian it stirs my blood – makes want to invade pesky Bulgarian polyglot villages. much pillage

    Like


  176. Here’s the thing that PoF doesn’t seem to get.

    Eventually she may find “the one” and want to settle down. However it is highly unlikely that he will be quite enamored with her “sexual experience” as he is. Which is why on the face of it she will never find “the one”.

    Like it or not there IS a “double standard” ladies (and I use that term loosely, kinda like your cooches). It’s not because men are insecure, or that they “fear” empowered women…it is what it is, and most men find that prospect of settling down with a “slut” quite disgusting and will have no part of it.

    We can go into the reasons if you like, but it’s Evo-Psych 101.

    Like


  177. on November 25, 2009 at 12:41 am unlearning genius

    @Lupo,

    “Man, PoF, you’re like this week’s Wendy Schwartz.”

    Why does it bother you so much that she sleeps around? You are very clearly having M/W issues bro as your posts show anger .. PoF and her character is not unique (in either time or in place .. read up on Robert Greene’s AOS, if you haven’t already, to get a sense of the breadth of female personalities) .. Wendy Schwartz on the other hand though is so obviously trashy and very non ladylike, the comparison is not valid ..PoF is clearly feminine, classier, but with a touch of psychological masculinity.

    Has POF compromised her ability to land a high quality husband? ..Folks, you don’t know what kind of past many women can get away with .. there just are so many clueless guys around who WANT to be deluded that they have found miss snow white .. looks uber alles, with some psychological tricks even an ageing beauty can still charm many guys .. but not “alphas” .. but then nobody can tame alphas anyways …

    I agree though that with “experience”, POF herself would likely get bored and very likely also that the average quality of her suitors will decrease with time. I am sure she understands this? How good was my white-knighting by the way?

    Like


  178. on November 25, 2009 at 1:10 am unlearning genius

    @New Guy
    “it is highly unlikely that he will be quite enamored with her “sexual experience” as he is. ”

    Another arm-chair evo-psychologist. Sluts are way cooler than many women..
    —> Fuck the whole song and dance gene quality signaling and all this crap hoop tests that so called “non-slut” women put you through … most of it is transparent and gets old very fast.
    —> Another advantage of “experienced” women is that they are non-clingy .. and whenever you say “Get lost” .. there will be no drama.
    —> Fucking the same person for many months can be good provided you keep pushing the envelope, “experienced” women will freely do this and will be creative as well.

    Yes I was programmed to like madonnas. But i am more than my genetic programming and lucky me i can overcome this genetic irrationality. Give me a hot slut anyday …

    Like


  179. on November 25, 2009 at 1:53 am Phenomenal One

    Sluts are either woman who:

    1.) will have sex with ANYBODY
    or
    2.) will have sex with ALOT of people

    the latter is’nt as bad since a slut who has sex with alot of people will still have standards, while he slut who’ll have sex with anyone won’t.

    Which one do you choose (for a relationship)? Slut #1 or Slut #2?

    Like


  180. on November 25, 2009 at 2:11 am unlearning genius

    @Phenomenal one
    dude, only a whore sleeps with ANYBODY and that too for money.. a slut on the other hand usually is MORE ruthless about filtering mates.. but if she likes you, she will not put you through some arbit hoops …

    A relationship with a slut is actually a very good thing if you are a guy as it is usually “no strings” .. you get to fuck and also to have intimacy AND you have a quick “out” if greener pastures show up (and so does the woman).. however most guys are too fragile to handle this as it tacitly acknowledges that “YOU” are replaceable as well ..

    Like


  181. on November 25, 2009 at 3:43 am Phenomenal One

    “dude, only a whore sleeps with ANYBODY and that too for money.. a slut on the other hand usually is MORE ruthless about filtering mates.. but if she likes you, she will not put you through some arbit hoops … ”

    I always have used Slut & Whore with the same to meanings.
    I never knew that Whore was just a larger word and difinition of a Prositute (have sex for money, have sex with anyone).

    “A relationship with a slut is actually a very good thing if you are a guy as it is usually “no strings” .. you get to fuck and also to have intimacy AND you have a quick “out” if greener pastures show up (and so does the woman).. however most guys are too fragile to handle this as it tacitly acknowledges that “YOU” are replaceable as well ..”

    I think man and woman are more less likely able to handle
    their partner’s blantant displays of showing that they can be replacable while in a relationship.

    Everyone knows that relationship don’t last but if an entire relationship is based on blantantly showing the other that they can easily be replaceable, than why are you with them ?.

    Same thing for having your partner jump throught hoops or testing them. as soon as it becomes obvious to the partner and to a point were that’s all there is to the relationship, why would you (the person doing the testing) respond negatively ?
    If i knew a woman was testin me left and right, 24/7 i would’nt want to stick around any longer.

    I don’t know how some guys can just have test after test thrown at them (while a majority of the time being “the giver” in the relationship), and think they’re gonna get somewhere.

    Like


  182. @ biktopia: What a load of bullshit and feminine sophistry. I was very empathetic as a nice guy and it bought me nothing but heart break and lonely nights. You have no clue how the male mind works or how male to female attraction works. You are essentially advocating that guys act like women so that women will find them attractive. We call those sort of guys David Alexander and nothing repulses a girl faster.

    @ Poetry: You girls are really shovelling it on thick tonight. If a girl won’t open her legs for one guy as quick as she will another then she has deemed that guy to be less worthy. Any man with a hint of alphaness will recognise this for what it is and will not consider you LTR material unless he has no better options (but then he is probably not an alpha).

    Secondly, fuck the drawn out dating process. I learn more about a girl post-sex than I can on a hundred dates. If a girl makes me wait for sex then all it does annoy me, and make me value her LESS. I can fuck a girl a few hours after meeting her and know whether she is LTR material because ten minutes of pillowtalk reveals more of a girl’s soul than ten hours of pre-sex conservation.

    Like


  183. I wish i could show you the guy that im trying to explain, he was the nicest man in the world, and i have never seen someobody being able to so perfectly make women fall for him, and they rarely got angry on him, i was fascinated by his behaviour, and learned a lot from him and i use his game to this day. Rarely people misunderstand my good intentions as something they can use, but they hit the wall quite fast with that, before i met this guy, i was to nice, was too nice to him even, but he learned me to stand out for myself but also still be nice. And i am not taking anyones bullshit just because i have empathy.

    Like


  184. biktopia

    I wish i could show you the guy that im trying to explain, he was the nicest man in the world,

    he sounds like an ideal dream. so, fwiw why couldn’t you keep him

    Like


  185. I was to inexperienced and naive, and i just saw the train moving being unable to turn things my way, i was huffing and grumping, and that made it worse, i would have done things much otherwise today, looking back at that scenario, i did things that i am ashamed of, whatever it was good for was to gain his field strategy, that boosted me with a lot of profit later on. end of short explanation..

    Like


  186. Hey all,

    I just wanted to tell you guys some stuff I’ve been thinking about. There has been a lot of discussion as to the efficacy of game.

    Is it beneficial to all guys in all scenarios, or is its use limited to more attractive beta males? As an omega male with poor sex prospects, I’ve come to the
    conclusion that game benefits all men. Even the omegas, and even if it doesn’t get you laid. Why? Because game is a mindset for male empowerment and
    the maximization of male potential. It is helpful in getting girls, because it teaches that acting like a groveling kiss-ass doesn’t attract women, but does
    the opposite. It can help guys get booty. However, it even benefits guys that subscribe to it, but are unwilling or unable to effectively put it into practice. Game, as a mindset, is its own reward.

    Guys have a lot of potential–to innovate, to tinker, to dictate the direction of the economy as consumers. When guys overly subsume their
    personalities to get women, and pay for frilly, useless stuff for girls with their hard-earned money, it is a deficit to civilization as a whole.

    The lessons I learned from game, I’ve put into practice in my own life. I don’t pay for stuff for women, and I don’t make apologies for my hobbies and interests. The great thing about game is that it can allow a guy to get a lot of booty, but it can also help guys get some booty with minimal investment. It frees up guys’ potential, and reduces the amount of time they have to waste catering to women’s fickle natures.

    The one area where I differ in my views from Roissy’s teachings on game is the definition of an alpha male. To me, an alpha male isn’t necessarily the guy that hot women want to sleep with. My view of the alpha male is the guy that pursues his own interests and hobbies, and still manages to get booty from cute girls cos he is such a stoic, manly man with masculine features. The thing is, such men possess these characteristics intrinsically–they’re not cultivated.

    However, a guy can maximize his alpha component,
    by not putting up with crap from girls or giving them his money, and by getting them to give him booty with a minimal time investment.

    What do you guys think of my views? A lot of the people on this board seem like smart dudes (and I even think there are a few reasonably smart girls),
    so I’m interested to hear what you have to say.

    Like


  187. […] 2009, under Mental Clutter Over at Roissy’s place, Gig leaves behind a little gem of a comment dealing with the dreaded pairing of sluts and weak, non-dominant beta males. His comments […]

    Like


  188. ”””””aoefe permalink
    You’re cute DA. 😉

    2009 November 30 David Alexander permalink
    Hehe, I feel special. :-)”””””””

    Aww boosted up your sac for a second eh

    Maybe you won’t go gay.

    he he he

    Like


  189. Excellent article – Roissy, really love your writing.

    I’m trying this right now with a girl who’s quite conflicted – sworn off men for the time-being but getting quite into me. (I only go for challenges.) She’ll pull the disappearing act every time she lets her guard down and lets too much slip. (Early stages – I have to be careful not to chase when she does that.)

    Just a question. If this is the easiest way, what’s the *best* way to revive a flagging relationship? Or at least what are other options for this kind of situation, or for a girl pulling away a bit (for whatever reason)? I’m cautious to go too far with the seeing other women thing – I know some girls will chase as soon as they sense competition, but others will cut you off the second you cross a line and make them feel insecure. (Past experiences depending.)

    Like


  190. This makes it sound like the only way to date a woman is to ensure she’s always a little insecure. Is that really what a guy wants? Depressing. :/

    Like


  191. […] written before about the utmost importance of getting the upper hand with a woman, whether in a relationship or out of it. The partner with hand is the partner who governs the direction of the relationship. […]

    Like


  192. […] he was more serious. Turns out he was mostly busy with work and not exactly putting me into the ‘No Contact Zone’, which is something I greatly feared. Would it have killed him to answer with a one-word text to […]

    Like


  193. I totally understand the power of this strategy.
    However, is there a way to use this when my girl and I are living together in the same house and either one of us moving out is too impractical?

    Any advice would be really appreciated!

    Like


  194. on June 27, 2010 at 12:17 am msexceptiontotherule

    Buy a bigger house. More space to hide from her in.

    Like


  195. […] next time. And as I’ve noted before, a solid, healthy relationship rests on a foundation of the woman chasing the man. The day your woman succeeds at guarding you is the day you begin the slide into betahood, […]

    Like


  196. […] Its your choice to contact her next week but I have too much pride in doing that. I only try twice and thats it. After that she has to come to me. Read this: http://roissy.wordpress.com/2009/11/…-relationship/ […]

    Like


  197. […] just wanted to add something else, been reading http://roissy.wordpress.com/2009/11/…-relationship/ this little gem and its making me realise how weak and pathetic my mindset is. Add this to womens […]

    Like


  198. I remember my first relationship in high school with a girl who was the prettiest girl I’ve had so far. I was extremely beta with her, because I thought it was the thing to do.

    Sometimes, though, I would get bored talking to her after school while she waited for the bus (I had a car). Because she would not go out with me much, due to having protective parents and whatnot, the majority of time we spent together was like this.

    So when I did get bored, I just didn’t go to the bus stop one day. When I saw her the next day, she showed profound interest in where I went, like how I imagined a real girlfriend should be. That was the only time I felt like an LJBF wasn’t on the horizon as soon as someone better came along. (I didn’t know about LJBF and how to avoid it back then.)

    Of course I blew this capital by explaining to her where I went, and apologizing. Sorry was much too present on my lips during the time I was with her.

    Live and learn.

    Like