Double Standards

You hear it all the time from people who are getting shafted by reality.  “It’s so UNFAIR that guys get to do X with impunity while girls doing X suffer social stigma.”  They think by bitching like this and attempting to shame those who would live in harmony with double standards they can alter people’s behavior into something more to their liking (i.e., a non-status driven, non-materialistic, non-craven utopia of perfect loving LTRs where no one is left out and no one gets dumped and everyone has a soulmate and enough positive life-affirming experiences to share with their yenta friends in recipe-swapping blogs devoted to covering the fascinating minutiae of their funny, exciting, sexy, touching, poignant, growth-oriented lives.)

Then there are those who, when called out on their inconsistencies, deploy a swarm of sophistry intended to obfuscate and deny the existence of double standards because they are beneficiaries of them.  Acknowledging these truths would mean coming to terms with the fact that they, like everyone else, have at their core an animal nature.

Fuck that noize.  The truth of the matter is that double standards are necessary if you want to be halfway competent in your dealings with men and women.  As the author of “Looking Out for #1” and “Winning Through Intimidation” wrote:

If you deny reality it will automatically work against you.*

Double standards are fixed features of life as a sexually reproducing social organism.  The modern career woman is miserable because she is constantly locking horns with men who won’t value her for her career achievement as much as for her hourglass figure and bedroom skills, while these same men admire and respect career dominance by other men.  Her refusal to come to grips with this essential double standard explains why so many hard-charging women have turned their backs on their own femininity and lost the art of female coquettishness and submissiveness.  Alpha men have responded by fucking and leaving these domineering gender impostors for cute waitresses.  Betas have responded in their own way — by assuming the doormat position and giving these feminists *exactly* what they claim they want.

The same goes for sluts.  A man who sleeps with many women gets high fives from his buddies and sexual interest from girls who can’t help their burning loins.  But girls who sleep around are socially ostracized, used by men and shunned by women.  It has always been and it will always be as long as a woman has 400 eggs to a man’s nearly infinite number of sperm.  Parents will treat their sons and daughters differently when dispensing advice on how to deal with the opposite sex and all the harpies with their multiple humanities degrees shrieking equalist platitudes to the high heavens will never change this.  It’s one thing to bloviate from a comfy tenured perch while your lesbian lover sucks ben wa balls out of your cooch from under the desk; it’s quite another to entrust the welfare of your children with the twisted lies of the Bitterati.

*pretty girls have some leeway with this rule. (at least for a while. heh.)

A handy pocket guide to the most common double standards:

male slut = lothario
female slut = desperate

male CEO = alpha
female CEO = bitch

male model = silly
female model = alpha

male nerd = loser
female nerd = cute

young male death = statistic
young female death = tragedy

male nurse = beta
female nurse = agreeable

male stripper = clown
female stripper = desirable

male sports star = role model
female sports star = butch





Comments


  1. “Alpha men have responded by fucking and leaving these domineering gender impostors for cute waitresses. Betas have responded in their own way — by assuming the doormat position and giving these feminists *exactly* what they claim they want.”

    ‘Claim’ is the key word. The women who think they know what they want usually set themselves up harder for failure.

    Like


  2. on April 16, 2007 at 6:21 pm Days of Broken Arrows

    This is really good writing. But I wnat to add something. Men and women are not jusged by society in what roles they play but on how they will propogate the species. We are part of the animal kingdom. If there is one thing feminism forgot it is this. Feminists are so busy “socially deconstructing” this and that they forget we’re all really biologically animals.

    In that sense, double standards will always prevail. Poor men are considered poor breeding material, yet poor women are often not. Double standard? Not really when you play out the situation and look at how they will raise/spawn the next generation.

    Therefore, women who sleep around are looked down upon because we see them not as “sluts” but potentially bad mothers who will have out of control spawn. Biologically the female of the species oversees the raising of the spawn, and wild women are considered a poor match to do so.

    There are many other double standards; these are just two.

    I recommend everyone rent the 1986 movie “Lucas,” where the title character gives a great explanation of why it’s biologically determined who we will breed — or want to breed — with.

    Like


  3. […] a cheating wife is much more dangerous to the stability of the marriage than a cheating husband. Double standard? Of course! Deal. Human nature cares not for your equalist […]

    Like


  4. […] this verbal missile. It isn’t a misogynistic word since it is gender neutral, but given the double standards of human nature it doesn’t pack the same wallop when used against a man. Timing, context, and […]

    Like


  5. One important part of the historic double standard that you have left off is what was required of men in return for women’s sexual restraint: military service/bravery/ physical defense.

    Women’s duty: virginity until marriage, then remain faithful
    Men’s duty: be wiling to kill or risk your life in defense of said family or nation

    No doubt some will still find this inconsistent and unfair. Maybe it is but would you really trust the safety and well being of society to the physical force of women when confronted by a hostile enemy? Would men have been inspired to put women in lifeboats ahead of themselves if they knew those women had been promiscuous?

    Another point is that male promiscuity or infidelity, while often winked at, was never actively encouraged. Feminists seem to encourage female promiscuity in the guise of self-fulfillment.

    Like


  6. The basis of the slut vs stud double standard lies in :

    It takes a lot of work and facing uncountable rejections to be a stud.

    It takes no work whatsoever to be a slut.

    note: maybe the top 1 % of ultra attractive men are exempt from this rule. Rock/rap/hip hop stars, kings and princes…

    As long as women are the ultimate gatekeeper of which men get to enjoy sexuality, this double standard is justified, and necessary.

    Like


  7. […] is Roissy, don’t bother bitching ineffectually like a wind-up Jezebel lezbot about “double standards“. They are a fact of deeply ingrained sex differences, and aren’t going anywhere. No […]

    Like


  8. “Bitterati”

    LOL! Sheer genius. I have just added a superb word to my daily vocabulary.

    Like


  9. Mandy —

    Yuup. Well said.

    Like


  10. Most men on here sound like a bunch of jealous bitches.
    Seriously, you know nothing about women.
    I’ll have sex with whoever I want, whenever. And I don’t give a shit WHAT you call me, you sound like a jealous little boy.

    Like


  11. Jessica

    The only sort of instruction that you have to offer guys is not in your words but in your loins. We pay attention to your choice of fuck-buddies, everything else you might want to communicate is pre-ignored/written off/ discounted.

    Like


  12. I don’t quite see your point about the numbers of eggs and sperm. First of all, women don’t lose eggs from having sex. An entirely abstinent woman will lose one egg a month during menstruation, the same as any “slut” who isn’t pregnant. I think we got a bit confused, yes?

    Incidentally, I’m quite an intellectual and assertive woman, but I’ve never had a problem finding guys who respect me for it.

    Like


  13. on April 9, 2009 at 6:30 pm Default User

    Emily

    I don’t quite see your point about the numbers of eggs and sperm. First of all, women don’t lose eggs from having sex. An entirely abstinent woman will lose one egg a month during menstruation, the same as any “slut” who isn’t pregnant. I think we got a bit confused, yes?

    When one of your eggs are fertilized, you are out the game for nine months. However, my little swimmers will be still rearing to go.

    As soon as I fire of one batch, there is another entire troop of volunteers ready to serve the cause.

    Like


  14. Ahhhh! Another reason why men shouldn’t be allowed to speak!

    Like


  15. All the apparent arbitrariness of sexual double standards instantly evaporates when you look at it from an evo psych perspective.

    Like


  16. test : boring

    Like


  17. and you forgot

    male virgin = omega male
    female virgin = madonna

    Like


  18. Sluts vs studs is a classic example of the above. Men have billions of sperm to spread around, so from an evolutionary perspective it behooves them to mate with as many women as possible. It’s a primal drive to do so and it’s rewarded favorably if a man pulls it off because women are the gate keepers. Not all men are able to attain this feat which is biologically driven so the few who do are looked at in a favorable light.

    Women on the other hand only have so many eggs and the ramifications of reproduction is so taxing that they couldn’t afford to mate like men could. The ones who did were historically seen as renegades playing with fire, so to do so was stigmatized at an early time in human history. And for good practical reason.

    Mother nature is not a feminist.

    Like


  19. […] in the facsimile of a long term commitment. This is another one of those intractable and intrinsic gender double standards that whiners will just have to learn to accept with dignity — divorced men suffer less of a […]

    Like


  20. samseau has the perfect example

    Like


  21. […] pipe up that Owen was just doing what men do all the time. Congratulations! You just figured out double standards exist and life isn’t fair. First prize, a group hug from fellow knobbobbers. Second prize, a beta with few options. Third […]

    Like


  22. men prove. women choose.

    Like


  23. Mandy is right here. There is a double standard in name, but not in spirit. Unless your ideal is an evolution into androgynous hermaphrodites where everything can be fair in name and spirit for everyone, you have to respect the different capabilities and responsibilities of men and women. They are not double standards, just different roles. What confuses the issue is having people like Roissy hoist the Machiavellian flag and parade around like an idiot. The proper answer to the childish feminist fantasy of equal roles for women and men is to explain the complementary capabilities and make-up of the sexes, not to hammer down that injustice is endemic in the world and suck it up. No wonder they just end up screaming even louder.

    Like


  24. default user As soon as I fire of one batch(into chic noir) , there is another entire troop of volunteers(SD, aoefe,emily, lily,sara,rebeca etc..) ready to serve the cause.

    here sweetheart I fixed that for you 🙂

    Like


  25. […] this point has already been made. Men and women are different, and value different things in one another. Hence, double standards […]

    Like


  26. […] this point has already been made. Men and women are different. We value different things in one another. Hence, double standards […]

    Like