Perverted Porn

If the variety of porn is any indication, most guys are capable of acting out the craziest atrocities fantasies in the bedroom.  But the appeal of some bizarre porn niches baffles me.

Drinking cum out of a glass
Grossout rating: 8
Worse than that scene in Rocky where he gulps raw eggs.  Jizz should not be drunk like a cocktail, no matter how strawberry-kissed the lips slurping it down.

Sexual perversion rating: 9
Where is the turn-on here?  There’s no hot humiliation aspect a la facials, and the girl is making gurgling noises and grimacing while choking back the slime.  Usually the camera is zoomed in on her mouth, which means her naked body in the background isn’t visually available to distract from the repulsiveness of her cumchugging.  You’d have to be a world class pervert to get aroused watching this spectacle.

Two guys one girl
Grossout rating: 2-10 (highly variable on male to male physical contact)
There’s a reason why male porn actors get little face time and are reduced to mere functional genitalia to occupy the woman’s orifices — guys don’t want to see hairy, sweaty naked dudes obstructing the view of the girl any more than is necessary to get the coital point across.  Two of them is just double the obstruction.  And if one of them happens to misfire and accidentally shoot his load into the face of the other guy, well… let’s just say I would need many MANY fucking years of therapy after watching that.

Sexual perversion rating: 4
Judging by its internet popularity, the fantasy of two men shish kabobing a woman isn’t uncommon.  But if scrotums start commingling, cocks start touching, or male body parts start incidentally rubbing against each other, the perversion rating zooms up to 10 if you’re a straight guy.  It drops to 1 if you’re gay.

Cum swapping
Grossout rating: 5-8 (depends on volume of transfer)
This is right up there with the cum cocktails.  I dunno, a girl spitting skeet into the mouth of another girl doesn’t seem like a visual treat to me.  Maybe I’m sexually repressed?

Sexual perversion rating: 6
Beyond missionary, not quite a sheisse vid, cum swapping exemplifies de rigueur perversion.

Bukkake
Grossout rating: 7
Plus: facial.  Minus: cascading sheets of semen.

Sexual perversion rating: 7
I suppose an argument could be made that where one is good, one hundred is better.

Frat house voyeurism
Grossout rating: 4
More annoying than gross.

Sexual perversion rating: 5
Lord knows I understand the thrill of fucking in public, so porn dedicated to that popular perversion makes sense.  But fucking in front of a roomful of drunk fratboys whooping like retards and giving play by plays?  This turns me off faster than watching The View.  I suspect the LNS crowd digs this stuff.

Machine/medical instruments sex
Grossout rating: 5
The inside of a vagina should not see the light of day.

Sexual perversion rating: 5
Eh, uninspiring.  Makes me empathize with an ob/gyn visit.  Props to the Sybian, though.  Ten bucks those girls are really getting off!

Do my wife
Grossout rating: 1
Not gross, just disturbing.

Sexual perversion rating: 7
When I’m watching a good fuck, I don’t want to see some guy playing the husband character sitting in a nearby chair and pretending to be emotionally distraught as his “wife” gets pounded by one of the bang bros.  Seriously, what kind of dweeb goes in for the cuckold fantasy?  Obviously someone who has DEEP fucking insecurities and wrestles control over them through whacking off to adultery porn.  If I’m gonna identify with anyone it’ll be the pool boy, not the sap, natch.  Now stop crying, bitch, and hand me your wife’s speculum.

Asslicking
Grossout rating: 10
Falls under the category of “Can never get clean enough”.

Sexual perversion rating: 8 (her ass), 10 (his ass)
Hey, you’ll find no bigger aficionado of anal than me, but there’s a world of difference between plowing her with my tool and getting her dingleberries caught in my teeth.  Girls don’t shit wafer thin mints, so how is licking her anus supposed to be fun?  I pray I never shake hands with a guy who gets off on asslicking porn.  And porn where the girl licks the guy’s carpeted asshole?  Sweet fancy moses, why don’t you just reach in the bowl and eat his log, scatgirl?

Squirting
Grossout rating: 3
No, I don’t mean natural squirting, which is a beautiful act of humanity.  I mean the supersoaker squirting where they fill the girl’s pussy up with a gallon of skim milk and let ‘er rip.  Exaggerating the normal bodily functions is pretty much the byline of porn, but twisting it into a ridiculous caricature of the real thing is a complete turnoff.

Sexual perversion rating: 3
Enjoying the sight of a girl squirting is perfectly normal.  Enjoying the sight of a girl vomiting out of her vagina is slightly perverted.  For guys who like this, I suspect childbirth regression issues.

What’s going on here I think is that straight sex is no longer enough for a segment of the male population.  The bar of deviancy is constantly being raised to the point that foreplay includes golden showers.  I predict women will continue to dress and act sluttier so as to satisfy the ever-growing demands of porn-raised generations of men.

Coincidentally, paternity testing will also rise.





Comments


  1. on September 5, 2007 at 1:41 pm Days of Broken Arrows

    Ha! I’m here first! Good post again. Here’s my theory. Guys get turned on when they’re in charge and women are damsels-in-distress. This why a woman with a flat tire gets 100 guys offering assistance.

    Unfortunately, besides the tire, in modern life (esp. urban life) men rarely get the opportunity to act out in any chivalroos way. In fact, offers to help any woman are often rebuffed and the woman throws you into the Beta category and hates you forever because you “demeaned” her by inferring she was inferior and needed help. etc.

    Yet men still like seeing women in distressed because I think it plays on some kind of primal urge. They can gratify this urge by watching women being degraded in porn. Look at the media — all women are “strong” “all knowing” “in control.” Guys don’t find this sexy. So they turn to women being gagged by enforeced face-fucking.

    Conclusion: The masculization of women by feminists and media is responsible for this. Also, Roissy, if you know this much about it, you must like it to some degree! Own up!

    Like


  2. The spunk in porno movies is actually Ivory diswashing liquid, delivered via a flesh-colored tube on the away-from-camera side of the man’s tallywhacker. A variation, used when the girl swallows, is produced by adding corn starch to the water left over from cooking pasta.

    Like


  3. the porn i dont get is amatur…i like my porn to look gooood…
    guess im just a silly art-core girl..
    xoxo

    Like


  4. Great post.

    DaysofBrokenArrows–I think the damsel in distress thing is sexy too but we as women are also taught that strange men are dangerous.

    We are told over and over for our own safety to rebuff the guy who wants to help you carry your groceries or help you change a tire because so much of the time these are scary men who are doing so because they want to attack/kill you. The minute you give them an “in”, you are just asking to be butchered in your car.

    Not saying that is how these men ARE, just explaining a bit about why some women don’t want help.

    Its not about being stronger than men, its about fearing strange men.

    Then again, these same psychos are the ones that get MAD if the women says she doesn’t need help…you have to try to imagine how it is for women sometimes.

    Not feminazis or whatever you guys call the but regular girls who don’t want to be attacked or hurt. We listen to the news, we read the papers…we live in reality.

    And in reality, women are brutalized every day.

    Its a time of paranoia, thats just how it is.

    Sorry I did not mean to completely change the subject of the post, just give an explanation for some women.

    But in terms of chivalry and DATING, yes–the “I am stronger than you” woman is going to be less appealing than her feminine counterpart. Agreed.

    Like


  5. PS–Frat house porn is gross and machinery porn is TERRIFYING.

    But other things such as vibrators (or something not painful looking) are very hot. Just as long as its not one of those bright purple double sided ones…AH!

    Like


  6. on September 5, 2007 at 3:13 pm Days of Broken Arrows

    Hi Kassy,

    I get what you are saying and it is correct in theory, but I urge you to look at actual FBI stats. Women are noit nearly as brutalized as the numbers the propagandists would have you believe. In fact, more violence is inflicted upon men than women — far more (of course it’s men doing the violence to other men, but I digress). In fact, the “one in four” stat about rape is not based on any science, just an informal NOW survey. The original survey looked at abuse and counted “arguments” as abuse. Sloppy writers took “abuse” to mean “rape” and thus the “one in four” stat was invented. There was also an invented story about women being abuysed Super Bowl Sunday that was disproved — by the feminist-friendly Washington Post!!

    The reason for the above is that women’s organizations get gov’t money and upping the stats gets them more grants. There is also some man-bashing here, of course. I wish I had saved my info, but recently a women’s group put out the false statistic, that “80 percent of Korean women in America are abused by their husbands.” This ran in my local newspaper. I cross checked it with actual census stats and found that the number couldnn’t be true: The census counts Asians — they don’t extraoplate Koreans! And think about that stat for a sec: 80 percent?!!! What could be going on in Korean-American households?!! And how is it their kids do better on average? Does than mean an abusive house equals top students?

    Anyway, all of this stuff harms ethnic groups, instills needless fear in women and makes men into “potential predators,” which most of them are NOT.

    Sorry for going way off topic, Roissy.

    Like


  7. Days–False reporting is always terrifying and as naive as this sounds, I look forward to the day when men and women can both live without fear of abuse( emotional or physical) or rape or violence on a daily basis.

    🙂

    Like


  8. But to bring it back to the gross porn, another thing that is icky:

    Pimply genitalia in more low budget porn (and sometimes in bigger budget porn). Isn’t there somewhere that sells body paint to cover that up, just for the movie?

    I don’t wanna SEE that.

    Like


  9. Am I the only one that thinks this post was pure comedic genius? I can’t remember reading anything this funny in the longest time.

    “but there’s a world of difference between plowing her with my tool and getting her dingleberries caught in my teeth”

    Are you serious, did you really just write that! Fuck some comedian wait an entire lifetime to come up with that. Well played again

    Like


  10. “Girls don’t shit wafer thin mints, so how is licking her anus supposed to be fun? I pray I never shake hands with a guy who gets off on asslicking porn. And porn where the girl licks the guy’s carpeted asshole? Sweet fancy moses, why don’t you just reach in the bowl and eat his log, scatgirl?”

    So what is my sexual perversion rating if I get off on this kind of humor?

    Liked by 1 person


  11. on September 5, 2007 at 5:59 pm Days of Broken Arrows

    Kassy,

    Here’s a link to a story that’s related in theme: ADHD diagnoses in kids are apparently at record highs. Yet other countries don’t see m to have this problem. Why do we? Because schools get government money for every kid they diagnose. It’s the same with victim’s rights groups. No one would arge you need schools and these groups, but both go overboard.

    Thanks for spoiling my lunch with a mention of pimples on private parts. Now there’s a visual image!

    Link:
    http://www.baltimoresun.com/news/health/bal-adhd0904,0,5293263.story

    Like


  12. dba – good insight. i can see how dominating humiliation porn is male fantasy in a world where chivalry is irrelevant. it all comes back full circle to female financial independence, i say.

    couple thoughts.
    there’s a lot of crap in porn. funny looking shlongs, fat chicks, etc. pimpled asses should not be one of them.
    amateur porn is kinda hot if the participants meet some basic minimum attractiveness threshold. i dunno, maybe it’s hot because it feels like you’re peeping in your neighbor’s bedroom window.

    nikita – very very high. pee wee herman is your apprentice.

    Like


  13. Boy, what a post to return to.

    I always thought the dom/humiliation stuff was for sissy Betas who would never dare speak up to a woman, let alone punch her tits. Not into it myself and frankly I find the amount of beating/strangling erotica out there pretty fucking creepy.

    Similarly, the fratty stuff is primarily fantasy for those never cool enough to go to frat parties. Real frat boys don’t fuck chicks on their TV room sofa because they know they’ll have to sit in the stain for the next 5 years. This kind of nonsense is where people get the idea that Duke lacrosse players are heterosexual.

    You barely touched on (no pun intended) the pee pee poo poo stuff. Ugh. And really there’s far, far, far worse out there. Sweet fancy Moses indeed.

    Even with all the nastiness what throws me most about porno is the dialogue. I guess they have to earn their Screen Actors Guild cards somehow, but c’mon. It totally throws the moment. If some girl ever screamed something like “Cram it in my ass like the whore I am!” while I’m taking her from behind I’m pretty sure I’d stop whatever I was doing, pull out, pull my pants back up and walk straight out of the parking garage right then and there.

    Liked by 1 person


  14. I would also like to point out that apparently KassyK is the kind of girl who posts about vibrators during work hours.

    Like


  15. jewcano, i hope for the sake of humanity the pee and poo stuff is a smaller niche than the cum cocktail audience.

    and this post was designed to smoke out kassyk. 😉

    Like


  16. No mention of multiple cream pies?

    I saw this 5 guy cream pie video….. that my friend had. They interviewed the last guy about how he feels to enter the vagina of a woman after 4 guys already deposited their juice in her.

    “I try not to think about it.”

    Liked by 1 person


  17. Sperm competition. More guys leaving their jizz in a girl -> pressure for you to deposit more swimmers -> bigger loads -> better orgasm.

    Simple explanation for multiple cream pie videos, 2 guys & 1 girl videos, etc.

    Actually scientifically tested too. When men masturbate to videos of multiple guys and a single woman they release more sperm. The body hasn’t caught up with the tech of the video camera yet.

    Like


  18. going to do a woman from behind only to see some other guy’s spunk queefing and dribbling out of her is one of my recurring nightmares.

    Liked by 1 person


  19. This’ll make that nightmare worse: the shape of your penis is designed specifically to pull out other guys’ spunk as efficiently as possible.

    Ever notice that you pump harder and faster when you’re going at a chick that you either haven’t seen in a while or are doing for the first time and that you think is a bit loose? Think about why.

    Like


  20. […] Kyle Smith wrote an interesting post today onHere’s a quick excerptThere’sa reason why male porn actors get little face time and are reduced to mere functional genitalia to occupy the woman’s orifices — guys don’t want to see hairy, sweaty naked dudes obstructing the view of the girl any more than is … […]

    Like


  21. Agreed 100%

    Even made a few of the same points I made in this post. I don’t know why more girls don’t own up to watching.. I always like the ones that are the most adamant about not partaking in porn viewage – those are the ones I tend to think are addicted.

    Like


  22. I’m not sure but I think girls have a problem with acknowledging there sexuality to guys. They do between themselves but lack expression to men in public. They
    seem sexy yet cold. they cum all day long quietly between themselves while on the bus or at the office without expression and we never know it. They never let us in on it. This bleeds over into what they tell us. They talk alot ‘a shit and say they hate us but thats because most guys dont get them off as much as they want us to. They keep to themselves cuz I think they resent having to deal with the usual one shot hour role over rover they see all day long everywhere.

    Its the guys like me that can fuck and cum for 8-9 intense concentrated hours of real action multiple times each day at a time that gets the short end of the stick. Sexy ladies everywhere all over dc and none of them are open to who would and who wouldnt satisfy them. The bunch of rotten apples spoils it for the bunch. Its become so rotten that they cant discriminate between anyone. To them everyone is a potential looser. This is why I think they talk alot of shit.
    Most guys dont know an ass from a pussy and make the girls think thats the way sex is supposed to be with guys. Sex has nothing to do with an ass. Thus girls have nothing to do with most guys.

    Ladies, am I right? tell me i’m right. You’ll flip when you find out who this is. You’ll beat yourself senseless over the totla loss you’ve been hit with when you find out what you’ve been doing.

    Like


  23. They look at perverted porn just as guys yet dont say they do and they cum a WHOLE lot more often than us. This is why they pretend to like excitement. Their just searching for an excuse to let it out and release all that bottled up cumming.

    Advice: Sliiiiiirp the whole clit, not just the tiny part you see…….

    Like


  24. if you can empty a chick like me, she’ll keep on cumming back for much more. its not fucking or lubrication that they want. they want their faucets turned on all the way up to max and left their…………………………………………………………………..
    …………………………….

    most guys arent normally born built with the ability to get that done for them. they go to porn and cum quietly wanting more than one guy cuz 1 just aint their for them as long as they need. many arent really doing it for them either and this is where they hate guys.

    girls will tell you this is true. they tolerate guys permanent inability to satisfy.

    ladies, most of them wont ever be able to be what you want. Their just not born that way. This is true for ladies who dont know a guy-friday when they see him. when you reject a guy whos friday for ya its a mutual total loss even if you didnt know it was.

    “I revert to my previous comment..” – ex pres clinton
    [Need I say more?]

    Like


  25. rofl…I missed this post completely…classic.

    Like


  26. […] Barely Legal > Youporn > cumpilations > SI swimsuit issue > tubgirl […]

    Like


  27. None of that is as traumatic as the camera suddenly swivelling to the dude’s face just as you blow your load.

    [editor: you guys are killing it today.]

    Like


  28. I don’t like watching asslicking too much, but truth be told, I love being the one doing the licking.

    I’ve had my tongue up a lot of hot chicks’ asses – and I mean UP their asses. I don’t just rim their asses, I fuck their asses with my tongue – and I have to agree with Roissy that hot chicks don’t shit wafer thin mints, but only because there’s scant evidence they shit at all. And I should know. We’re talking dozens of asses.

    Hot chicks are like my Mercedes with a $20,000 engine. I keep putting fuel in my car, but it doesn’t shit. Same with the true hot chicks, the real thoroughbreds. I’ve walked in on hot chicks after I thought they took shits, and all I could small was oil and vinegar.

    I dated a hot coke whore who claimed coke made her shit almost immediately, but there was never a whiff of evidence in terms of bathroom smell or ass smell to back that up; ditto for ass taste … nothing! Her claim was the ultimate shit-test: she was probably just trying to ascertain whether I shit, or de-objectify herself by claiming that she herself took shits.

    I started taking Metamucil a few years ago, and now half the time don’t really need toilet paper and my ass doesn’t even smell. When I do need toilet paper – and I always give it at least one wipe to be sure – I almost always use baby wipes. I figure that whatever shitting hot chicks really do – if they really do shit at all – they are probably using this technology, and more.

    Of all the asses I’ve ever approached for licking, only one ever smelled. I had a feeling going in it was gonna be a mistake, but I hadn’t had it in a while and started going in anyway until I caught the whiff and backed off. None has ever tasted. No brown on my tongue, either, and certainly no dingleberries. It probably helps that most of asses I’ve licked were of hired help – they were prepared. And since they were hired help, I didn’t have to worry that if it stank or tasted funny, I would be expected to do it again.

    You don’t lick the ass of a drunk of a girl you’re going to marry and have to deal with the fact that she gets insulted 30 years down the road when you won’t lick her ass any more. You don’t lick the ass of a lawyer-type you meet at a DC happy hour in a bar with a wet floor after she’s been queefing at her desk all day long in sweaty nylon panty hose.

    Maybe I just have to be really turned-on to do it, my sexual fever deadening my sense of smell. While its imperative that a girl be ready for it, I don’t like licking a girl’s ass when she wants it or expects it – maybe “when you least expect it” is womanese for finding your soulmate when the schmoe you let pick you up when you’re drunk suddenly and unexpectedly tongues your colon – but I’ve been running into that more and more, yet another phenomenom that can probably be blamed on Sex in the City. Maybe because it feels too beta to have a girl bend over, cheeks spread wide, and indicate what she wants done, but I find that suddenly what would otherwise be a lickable ass suddenly looks like pretty much nothing more than a smelly hole that shit comes out of.

    The one exception was one night with Summer (real alias, real name not being divulged because I am trying to get back in her good graces after posting it on this site), who came over one night in what appeared to be a meth-induced sexual frenzy, promptly sat her ass right down on my face, and began licking, fingering, and tongue-fucking my ass like there was no tomorrow. Of course, I didn’t expect it.

    Summer: The extent to which she pirated me would make Blackbeard blush

    I’ll never forget the first ass I licked. She was a gorgeous, petite, short-haired Latina, at the windowless peeps on 42nd Street in New York. After feeling her tits for the obligatory $1.50, I put another 50 cent token in the machine, the window lifted up, I handed her a couple of bucks, and started feeling her ass. She spread her cheeks, and showed me her gorgeous pink asshole that she bragged to me was still a virgin. Within a millisecond I ended that status, with my tongue, and within a matter of seconds, the wall of the booth was dripping with what seemed like pints of my semen. The window went down, and she was facing me, with sheer love in her eyes, as she began fondling my air, looking like she wanted to husband me. If had a little more game back then, I’d have made a digits move, and our children would be in graduate school by now.

    To my knowledge, no one ever talked about having her ass licked by me more than Heroin Michelle. I picked her up in a club one New Year’s Eve, made out with her furiously all over the place, including the dance floor, but when she invited herself into my apartment, I couldn’t close the deal because my grandmother was asleep inside, and I figured I’d have another shot anyway. Five years of telling her how much I wanted to fuck her and lick her ass, literally pleading for the opportunity, I offered to let her stay while she was on house arrest. She took me up on my offer, but found a boyfriend just before she moved in and still wouldn’t give me any sex. Early one morning, after sneaking out to party, she returned and I insisted she join me on my bed. After a bit of cajoling over repeated objections that I was her “friend,” it was off to the races. At some point, I had her bent over doggy and started fucking her from behind, couldn’t resist the allure of her dreamed-of butthole, and I dove right into it tongue-first, driving her head to the floor as she arched frontward over the side of my mattress-on-the-floor bed. Her freshly-showered ass was fresh, yielding not a hint – as I later found out – that she had fucked four other guys the night before. At first, she thought it was a prelim to anal, and was afraid of that since though she loved anal, she thought I had too big a cock. She loved having my tongue in her ass so much she told her sister, she told her friend, and was still talking about it and hinting for a replay a couple of years later when she returned from the West Coast a fugitive to turn herself in and face up to jail.

    Told the world about her first anal tongue

    I used to worry that chicks would think I was a pervert if I licked their ass. I’ve only received one negative reaction, and it was a hot street whore in Waikiki, in 1986. I asked her right out on the street if she would do that. She looked at me with scorn, exclaiming, “I don’t do that shit!,” and walked away. But no chick has ever reacted to me with anything but full-on appreciation and ecstasy once the act has commenced. Porn Star Jenny Hendrix actually publicly asked me, through my girlfriend and in front of several other people in the lobby of a club, if I would do it to her. And I’ve run into at least three hot chicks in the past few years who first surreptitiously started doing it to me; one even subtly advertised on backpage.com that she loves licking ass, and on our second date, I reciprocated.

    I won’t lick a big ass, or one that’s too small and flat, and I won’t lick the ass of a girl that’s hairy (more likely to have ass hair that catches dingleberries), or Jewish (too high an incidence of irritable bowel syndrome). I won’t lick a black ass, and the only Asian – after many opportunities – I ever approached was the one that stank (too many weird things on their menu, and their asses are rarely shaped right). I won’t lick the ass of a woman much over 40, unless she’s near-perfect, and I won’t lick the ass of a girl that’s on the rag (too many things to clean down there at the same time). I won’t lick the ass of a girl with bad breath, or a smelly pussy, or underarm odor. Hot blondes and hot Latinas are the best – the latter seem to consider it virtually obligatory. Hot Italianettes are good, too.

    I used to run ads on AdultFriendFinder offering it, but I never got any takers stating they were interested in it. Maybe I was a ahead of my time, or maybe everyone else was already doing it and not talking about it. I thought it would be a selling point; apparently, it wasn’t.

    The thing with asslicking in porn is it rarely seems that the porn star doing the asslicking or the starlet receiving it is really into it, maybe because, like me, they prefer it when it isn’t planned. Then again, maybe those guys are oversexed and spoiled, or maybe they feel funny licking ass in a room full of people, with cameras recording the event for the whole world to see, preserved for eternity, or at least until the Beneath the Planet of the Apes moment that will probably be upon us all too soon. In porn, girls seem to do with more enthusiasm (and therefore better) to other girls – yet another demonstration that they are just bigger freaks.

    Also, porn starlettes know when its coming. The chicks who’ve loved getting their asses licked by me the most either had never had it done to them before, or weren’t expecting it. It literally knocks their socks off.

    OK. That’s a lie. Their socks are always already off. And their bras. And their panties. But you know what I mean.

    And no camera can quite capture the feeling of hot chicks’ pristine, saliva-lubricated ass cheeks resting on my face cheeks, the feeling of of their assholes literally squeezing my tongue with delight, the feeling that exact moment they relax into it and just let their pussies fill with vaginal juices knowing they have passed the ultimate inspection of their digestive systems. There was major sex study a couple years ago that found that women enjoyed sex the most when they felt appreciated by a sex partner, and nothing makes them feel more appreciated by a sex partner than having a guy’s tongue in their ass.

    OK, maybe a guy helping with the vacuuming makes them feel as appreciated, but nothing else sexual quite has the impact of a fully-ass-inserted tongue. Eating pussy is largely beta, oft-reducing a guy’s status a notch; eating ass triggers love. Real guys don’t eat much pussy; we eat ass. Staring at and drooling over clothed asses is just supposed to be the prelude.

    Here’s a link to a rare porn scene where the guy is licking ass right (when you get to the linked page, you have to click on these numbers in small letters underneath the same numbers in big letters): 4[1](5)

    C’mon, admit it Roissy. After watching that scene, if you weren’t so oversexed, you’d be grabbing tissues.

    Anyway, that’s my ode to asslicking. Asslicking porn perversion rating 8. My perversion rating. Well, I was going to claim a perfect 10, but I’ve run into a couple of chicks who really get off swapping cum with me – with people watching – after I’ve licked their ass and before I’ve had a subsequent chance to use mouthwash or brush my teeth, so they’re even bigger perverts than me.

    I guess I’ll have to settle for a perversion rating of 9.

    In case you haven’t had enough, the pictures and video from my post, as well as some additional editorializing and links, are on my blog. Pardon some technical snafus that may occur in this comment.

    Like