A Test Of Your Game

Tonight, you are meeting a woman at a bar. This bar is in DC and it serves the best beer in the city. (It’s not Brickskeller. Those of you who live here will know which bar I’m talking about.)

The woman is someone you’ve been dating for a few months. Expectations have been established. Not firm rules, but slowly congealing guidelines for acceptable behavior. She tells you she will be at this bar tonight with a former co-worker, a man you’ve never met, and she wants you to come out and meet her at the bar. You say “Yeah, I’ll swing by later.” You’re an alpha; everything is always later.

When you arrive at the entrance of the bar you spot your girl across the room, sitting on a barstool between two men. There are no other empty stools near them. They are all laughing and drinking amongst themselves. Your girl is looking good, her bright red lipstick a beacon in the dim bar light. They haven’t noticed you yet. You watch them for a second before proceeding into the room, dispassionately curious about their dynamic. Soon you will walk toward them — the two men flanking your woman whose vagina you have penetrated repeatedly and vigorously — with intentions to introduce yourself. You don’t know which of the men is her former co-worker, or who the other man might be. In fact, you don’t know anything of their synergy, but that you see their smiles and hear their laughter. You begin walking to them.

What do you do?

I want specifics. Don’t patronize this blog’s audience with the obvious. You may think your testicular fortitude unassailable, but few men who read here are so socially awkward that they would believe confronting the men at the bar in a jealous pique is “being alpha”.

Who do you address first? How do you address them? Do you wait for your girl to introduce you or do you thrust your hand in promptly, prodding handshakes? Do you put an arm over your girl’s shoulder? Do you kiss her upon meeting? Or do you keep a few feet of distance between you and her in the interest of avoiding the perception of “boyfriendiness”?

Think details. Go.

PS Some readers have emailed me asking if my “test of your game'” stories are pulled from my own life or made up out of whole cloth. Most of the incidents I describe on this blog are events I have experienced personally. So yes, you are getting real life scenarios to ponder.





Comments


  1. I’d walk up to all three, kiss the girl and say that I couldn’t stay as I’d just got a call from ….. (fill in your excuse) but maybe I’d catch her later- if I had time. I’d ignore the guys.

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  2. The first thing I do is go to the Bar at an angle in which she will see me, and I order a drink making it seem as though I haven’t noticed her yet.
    Within the course of ordering the drink, we will make eye contact and I will nod, smile, collect my drink and head into her direction.
    Once there, if she leans toward me for a kiss, she gets one. If not, it’s not a big deal. I’m expecting her to make introductions but if she doesn’t, I would first introduce myself to the man on her left then the to the man on her right, addressing each with, direct eye contact, an even tone and a firm handshake.
    I’m not expecting to hijack the conversation, but if there is any kind of lull following the intro, I’ll start one on a topic of my choosing, probably relating to something I read or heard during the day that I found amusing.
    They were obviously laughing before I arrived so there’s no need to get all serious.

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  3. Say hi to her, then open up one of the guys, just like you would your girl. Chat them up, be friendly, don’t let them detect your intentions on the girl. That way they won’t be hostile towards your presence. This being America, think sports. The Florida/Bama game should do. That way they won’t be hostile. When your girl tries to say something, cut her off, ignore her, whatever. Don’t give her your attention.

    As soon as one of the guys goes to the bathroom, slip into his seat casually. Keep talking to the other dude, keep semi-ignoring your girl. When the inevitable lull in conversation occurs, hit your girl, who’s been feeling kinda ostracized by the conversation, with a good ol’ neg. Start chatting HER up. Use inside jokes, since you’ Make sure the conversation excludes the guy still there and the other dude who comes back from the bathroom, but also make sure they don’t feel like you’re purposefully doing it. The other two guys, not knowing what to do, will either interrupt, making them seem like tools, or just chat awkwardly amonst themselves. Either way, after 5-10 min. of talking with your girl, say: “Hey, let’s get outta here.” She will agree, and the two men won’t follow.

    *Note: If the guy doesn’t go to the bathroom, you’ll have to remain standing, which sucks and makes you look less alpha, but you can still skip to the part where there’s a lull in the conversation and make this work.

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  4. on December 8, 2009 at 10:32 am personal trainer

    I walk up behind her, grazing my cock up against her back and yell at the barmaid ordering a drink.

    She recognizing my voice and the size of my cock, whirls around and quickly introduces me.

    I smile and nod at them, then look back and begin flirting with the barmaid as I receive my drink.

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  5. This kinda depends on your girl’s personality. You either:

    a.) Walk up to the bar, not smack dab in the middle of them, but close enough to intrude slightly upon their conversation space- which might actually be right in the middle of them depending on how crowded the bar is. As you’re ordering, you catch your girl’s eye but don’t say anything, then turn casually with your back on the bar and at this point your girl should introduce her.

    or, if your girl is a little smarter/has a good personality for this type of stuff:

    b.) Same sort of deal, but intrude upon their conversation as if you were a stranger hitting on your girl. This is actually excellent when the guys she’s talking with (who should be flirting with her because your girl should be that good looking) have some game. Much like Jujitsu uses an opponents force against them, you’ve allowed them to warm up your girl with some witty banter and you can swoop and flip that all to your purposes. Leave with her within two minutes and take her right home. Bonus points if you keep the roleplay going all the way through the sex and then leave while she’s sleeping, never to talk to her again.

    A third option for the more Beta guys out there who don’t do well directly competing with other guys is to walk in, grab a beer, catch her eye with a little smirk as you walk to an open table and wait for her to join you.

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  6. “I’d walk up to all three, kiss the girl and say that I couldn’t stay as I’d just got a call from ….. (fill in your excuse) but maybe I’d catch her later- if I had time. I’d ignore the guys.”

    Yes, I couldn’t imagine making something out of this. Maybe play it off as “You know I’D LOVE TO STAY, but…” in a very happy and cheerful voice, expressing regret. Give a happy nod to one of the guys on your way out if you make eye contact.

    Or did the girl bring you to a place with two other guys in order to out alpha them? Is it a test you’ll have to meet eventually?

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  7. I’m not sure of the ‘alpha’ thing to do, the normal human being thing to do is ignore the men, greet the girl in whatever way you normally do and let her make the introductions. She’s put herself in the hostess position and should treat you as the host who she’s bringing up to speed as the party winds down. If she doesn’t right away you might ask her, “Did your mother raise you in a stable or is there a reason you’re not making introductions?”

    The other men should be treated in a casual, friendly manner until you have some concrete reason to do something else. Again, it’s up to the girl, who’s put herself in the hostess position to facilitate small talk, if she doesn’t then don’t make any special effort but simply speak to her. Small propietary displays of affection, toward her are fine.

    Don’t let one of the other guys offer you a seat unless they use your arrival as a cue to leave, which they should after a few minutes of sociable small talk. If there’s no space for you to sit and they show no signs of leaving (and she’s not making any veiled hints) then tell her you don’t want to just stand around and that you’re going somewhere where you can be comfortable. If she doesn’t take that hint, you’re in trouble.

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  8. Friendly, happy, and confident is the key here, no need to push anything. Walk up behind them and put both hands on the sholders of your girl and one of the dudes, making an opening remark to set YOUR frame. (“thank god you guys are here… you won’t believe this…”) She will likely introduce you, but of she doesn’t after a lull do it yourself in standard alpha fashion. The biggest prob is seating. If neither of the dudes or her offer you a seat next to her after a few minutes, you will choose a seat next to a dude and chat him up, generally ignoring her. Dudes will likely realize who you are and not interfere, but be prepared to run some amog game just on case.

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  9. I’d avoid elaborate tactics like pretending I don’t see them. Directness and easygoing confidence are needed here.

    I would walk up to them, say “hi babe” to her. No kiss; that might come across as insecure territory marking, especially if I can’t help but feel a bit threatened. Normal smile, as I look at both guys in a friendly way, and wait for her to introduce us to each other.

    If everything is innocent, she should light up when I come in, and conversation should be normal. If it’s not so, I pull a page out of the GMan’s book and begin strategizing my next swoop.

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  10. If I were a guy, I’d walk up to my girlfriend and say “hey babe” and then put my hand on the small of her back or lay it on her thigh, since she is sitting down. Then I would wait for her to respond. Next the two of you will probably hug.

    Finally, I would wait for her to introduce me to the gentleman and get the background info on who they are.

    Men are very perceptive of picking up on signs of ownership that men have toward their girlfriends/significant others. By placing you hand on the small of her back or thigh you are showing the other two men that the two of you are intimately involved. If your girlfriend doesn’t show obvious signs of ownership/belonging back towards to you by giving you a passionate hug or kiss, and promptly explain who the guys are then you know your “relationship” with her is not headed down the right ramp…..

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  11. Not quite sure what the problem would be here. Walk up, greet and kiss the chick, step back, eye contact and hand shakes with the guys. You treat them the same as any other strangers you might meet in a social or business setting. Who cares what they are talking about, you’re there now. Who cares if there’s an elaborate shit test being created by the girl?

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  12. I walk up and introduce myself, shake hands with both while holding their gaze, addressing the “more beta” one first.

    No PDA for the woman, let’s see if there is any “chemistry” first between her and the men. Watching the body language should suffice.

    At this point, I would ask which one is the former co-worker (which should then fill you in on who the other guy is).

    Now, as most people should know, the workplace is a HUGE hookup area. Men and women there are constantly meeting and hooking up outside of their relations. It is likely that your woman has hooked up with this man before, or that he very much wants to. So at this point, I ask him for some good funny stories about her. This does several things….

    1) It makes her self-conscious
    2) It can tell you the degree of their intimacy
    3) You continue to control the conversation

    From there, I just have fun.

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  13. I’m surprised by the men who are saying they would hover around the bar like creeps and not immediately make themselves known. Did you come to the bar to meet up with your girl, who you’ve already seen sitting there? If I were that girl and I looked up and saw my bf peering at me from inside the bar trying to interpret how I’m interacting with the two guys ( which is the only thing any rational woman would assume) I would think you were a a bit nutty.

    I’m also surprised the need of the alpha’s and alpha-wannabes who are saying they would immediately introduce themselves to the two men or even touch one of them. Both of the guys might be nobodies who are just chatting up your woman until her former co-worker arrives.

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  14. It’s not a big deal. You’ve already repeatedly banged this girl. The other guys are competing for your used goods. If you know the the girl well enough (which you should considering you’ve dated her for “months” and have penetrated her numerous times) you should know if the guys are the type she’d bang. Not that you even care. You shouldnt even acknowledge the situation as a competition. Getting bent out of shape over this is beta. Just say whats’ up to the group as a whole. Immediately and explicitly indicating that the girl belongs to you via kissing or arm around the shoulder will lower your status and is a sign of weakness. It shows that you feel threatened. Your vibe and easy going confidence alone should communicate “I’ve banged this girl.” Be cordial to the other dudes. Look them in the eyes with a friendly half-smile and say “I dont think we’ve met”. Feel out if the girl contrived this situation to play games with you. Eitherway, hang out, have a beer and begin to dominate the conversation. After one or two beers and gracefully displaying your charm, wish everyone a good night and then leave telling the girls “Ill talk to you later”. You got better things to do anyway. There is no game here if you’re an alpha.

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  15. I’m not sure of the ‘alpha’ thing to do, the normal human being thing to do is ignore the men, greet the girl in whatever way you normally do and let her make the introductions. She’s put herself in the hostess position and should treat you as the host who she’s bringing up to speed as the party winds down. If she doesn’t right away you might ask her, “Did your mother raise you in a stable or is there a reason you’re not making introductions?”

    The other men should be treated in a casual, friendly manner until you have some concrete reason to do something else. Again, it’s up to the girl, who’s put herself in the hostess position to facilitate small talk, if she doesn’t then don’t make any special effort but simply speak to her. Small propietary displays of affection, toward her are fine.

    I can’t agree with this. If she’s talking and laughing with two guys, they all have chemistry and are connecting on an emotional level. Someone coming in and telling them what one is “supposed” to do or reminding them of proper etiquette comes across as a wet blanket. Emotional can’t be overcome with rational, especially in the field of women. This kind of shaming could’ve been good game 60 years ago when people had an internalized sense of morality that wasn’t PC bullshit, but not today.

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  16. Club the men bloody like baby harp seals; do shots; fuck her stupid right there at the bar; go home; admire your mighty pimp hand as you drift off to sleep.

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  17. –Is she sitting ass out, like some dude hanging at the bar, or is she sitting with her legs swung out and crossed, with her back to the bar? This I gots to know, ’cause if her legs are out and she’s looking over the place, which is how I’d envisioned it, then my plan of just walking up, and saying “hey” with a smile and mind-meld lock on her eyes and leaving the introductions up to her should work. I’d be going for the isn’t-it-great-being-in-love/I-know-your-flirting-with-these-dudes-but-I-know-you-love-me thing. This is a situation where I might let myself get laughed at a bit; a moment of vulnerability. She might even amp it up with a coy, “yes, can I help you?” In which case you might say, “Uh, yeah, I was looking for my girlfriend, she’s [insert physical description of her, with a neg or two] and she should be wearing [dress description –maybe better to put the neg here]. Who knows how long that might go, but the thing would be, to let her break the thing down into, ok guys, this is my man.

    On the other hand, if she’s sitting ass out not even looking out expectantly for her man, not even doing the natural woman thing of checking everything out, but hunched over the bar with two dudes, WTF? What am I dating some sort of slag? What’s next, car bombs? Pizza delivery? One dude maybe. But two flanking her, hmm. Me no like. Me not happy. I’m not going over and fucking tapping her on the shoulder like mommy to get her attention. Fuck, if there’s no way I can place myself where she’ll see me without that kind of shit, then I’m stuck, stumped. She’s got to be open somewhat, to my arrival. Or else I might as well just split and wait for her text or something.

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  18. I’d do a causal estimation of which one is the most alpha. I would approach him directly. I’d probably give him a “buddy elbow pat” and a firm handshake and say, “you must be Jane’s coworker.” If I am wrong someone will correct me.

    I like the word “co-worker” in this context because its not the type of thing a person would normally say. It gives the whole situation a slight air of uncomfortableness which works to my advantage.

    Jane will then introduce me to the other guy, I presume. If not then I just turn to him, offer my hand and look half-askance. This is a sign that the other person is to introduce themselves. If for some reason he does, I would simply say my name.

    To move into the conversation I would say something like, “So is Jane telling you about X again” It doesn’t matter if I have any reason to suspect its the truth, its just a way to get them to explain the conversation without having to ask “what did I miss?”

    From here it really depends on what happens. My working assumption is that these guys are more an annoyance than anything else, but that I should magnanimous and involve them in the conversation for at least a bit before getting Jane to myself.

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  19. best bar in DC? Duh, it could *only* be the Reef. Everyone knows that.

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  20. Roissy, what were the ratings of the November 18th Test of Your Game? What was the best/right answer?

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  21. Walk straight up to the group, put your hands on both guys should and announce “Who’s ready for a shot?”. Simple, direct, and BS free. You’re only concern is potential roid rage.

    You’ve instantly announced your arrival, the fact that your there for a good time, and that you are completely unphased by the fact she’s chatting up two men. You force her hand to introduce to the other men as well, and you can control the conversation from there.

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  22. Should have been “put your hands on both guys’ shoulders”.

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  23. Step 1: Sneak up on her from behind, giving the ‘shhh’ finger sign to the two dudes if they see me, and give her a wet willy followed by a bear hug and a “hey baby” with a huge grin as she jumps startled out of her chair.

    Step 2: Immediately introduce myself to the two. I address and shake with the guy on my right first, as it allows me to greet him with my body language open before giving him the back/shoulder to reach over to the guy on the far left.

    Step 3: Look at the three beers on the bar, look at her, ask “which one of these is mine?”

    Step 4: Before she answers: “Let’s all go grab a booth!” I lead them back, my hand on the steering area directly above her ass. I slide in next to her and leave the other two across the table.

    Step 5: Snake my hands up her skirt while maintaining polite conversation with the two men; when she squirms and pushes them away, smirk and tease her about something unrelated. If she spreads slightly and gets into it, pull my hand away and give her a quick knowing glance.

    Every time I’ve been in a situation where the BF ignored me, stood back to avoid giving off the boyfriendiness vibe, or otherwise didn’t fully insert himself into the social group with at least some modicum of self-confidence, if not outright dominance, he came off as remarkably beta and eventually got dumped by my female friend.

    You’ve inserted some facts into the situation that may be red herrings. Where does the second guy come from? If she knew he was coming, that’s incredibly suspicious. If the former coworker brought him along, on the other hand, that’s a good indication that he either has no intentions of trying to get in her pants or no ability to do so. It’s not worth worrying about before I get there. The red lipstick is another point. Does she always dress up/make herself up to go out? If not, my interpretation is that she wants to muster their attention to show me her market value and make me commit more. I probably respond to this by fucking her hard that night, disappearing for a few days entirely, repeating this pattern for a couple weeks, then taking her on a real ‘couply’ date or two just long enough in the future that she won’t mentally link it to the events of that night.

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  24. Moving toward the group, I would signal the bartender with a raised hand that I want to place an order and proceed to insert myself between her and guy at the bar that she is not facing/talking with at the moment. I’ll be angled so that I’m already facing her slightly at the bar when ordering… she’ll recognize my thunderous voice while I place my order, turn, look at me in surprise, and I’ll give her a “Well, what do we have here?” remark along with a shit eating grin. She’ll lean towards me, put her arms around me and give me a kiss.. I’m leaning against the bar at this point and I’ll wrap right hand around her waist as she embraces me with her arms and kiss. She’ll proceed to introduce me to at least one of the dudes and you can roll with the conversation… I would also move this three-way (or four-way?) conversation to a table depending on the vibe or just jettison her outta there asap.

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  25. why would she want you to meet her co worker at a bar? I smell something. Why would a woman want you to be friendly with someone at work?

    acceptable: she wants to set him up with your sister.
    he has a business proposition for you.
    He plays bass and you need a bass player for your band.

    unacceptable: she wants to replace your friends with her preselected choices.
    she wants you to like him and for it to seem normal that she spends time with him.(flag)
    she has spit roasting in mind.
    oh just about any other reason that doesn’t include you getting something out of the deal.

    move on

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  26. I’m not sure of the ‘alpha’ thing to do, the normal human being thing to do is ignore the men, greet the girl in whatever way you normally do and let her make the introductions. She’s put herself in the hostess position and should treat you as the host who she’s bringing up to speed as the party winds down. If she doesn’t right away you might ask her, “Did your mother raise you in a stable or is there a reason you’re not making introductions?”

    Perhaps this is my sexist upbringing, but hostess or not, girlfriend or not, love interest or not, you address men before women, adults before children, bosses before subordinates, alphas before betas, and queen bees before hangers on.

    You basically address people in their social order. Whether you respect that order or think it is morally justifiable is a side point. Doing otherwise slots you in a lower position.

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  27. Walk straight towards them. Smile. Look relaxed. Open by consoling the men for having to suffer through her company. Don’t introduce yourself. Order a drink and stand with your back to the bar. Act like you own the place.

    Converse primarily with the guys and ignore her, or give one-word responses.

    Make sure to flirt with another chick within the first 30.

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  28. walk up, smack your girlfriend’s ass or (if you don’t roll like that grab the small of her back )while simultaneously putting your hand on one of the guys shoulders (either is fine since you can’t tell which one is the friend yet), smile and say hi i see you’ve met X.

    so basically 1) physically address your girlfriend while simultaneously physically/verbally minimal addressing one of he guys, she’ll tell you who they are after you cross that gate.
    if you find that the other guy is the friend address in the same minimalist manner with a smile – you are being polite but not much else. given the context he would be the one offering his hand to you, if he does offers throw out a vertical neutral firm handshake, if you decide to just initiate throw out a palm down handshake with a smile.

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  29. To be clear and detailed: I am approaching the set, focusing on the girl (who happens to be my girl), and just saying hey. Just hey. Or hi. No inflection, no question mark, just hey. I’m as close as necessary to talk in that bar. If I’ve got a line on that bar, I would guess two feet, horizontally. Less, actually: one foot. 8 inches. I’m not pecking. But I’m not stand-offish. I’m on The Edge of Peckness. My hands are at my sides. I come to a complete stop, but don’t assume the alpha counter-whatever (contraposto?) wide stance with one toe-out position, until and unless some bantering takes place or I am introduced into the group. I’m not signaling expectation of welcome or challenge, but sort of a polite curiosity. I offer my hand only after my lady commences introductions. BTW, if my girl doesn’t touch me as part of the welcoming procedure, then we’re probably done later that night. I’m not patting these guy on the shoulders and I’m not letting them do that to me. I’m not taking one of their seats; instead, I’d propose we all shift to a table… oh, there’s none open, ah well, I guess we’ll stand for a while. At that point, standing, if my girl was being touchy, I would calm her down with a snuggle, with a hold, or something, but basically, I’m not initiating any PDA or any possessive grappling.

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  30. Agree with Hardcore. Where’s the response to the previous Test of Your Game?

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  31. You open another girl in her line of sight until she fights for your attention or pulls you away.

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  32. Pupu prefers the nice and kind (slightly beta) approach these days for some reason. The nice thing to do would be to wave and smile to the girl while walking toward her. She must be very happy to see you and leave her seat to join you. Do not kiss beyond the cheeks. Lip locking in public is bad form unless it is the first intimate incidence between the two. Wait for her to introduce everyone. Stand side by side with her, in between both guys. Speak friendly to the guys. Ask the girl whether she has got her drink. Most likely, she has, it is still nice to ask nonetheless. She will be standing happily next to you like a puppy.

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  33. No game necessary. Walk up, introduce yourself to the guys, shake hands, a wink to the girl, get a drink and start talking. Talk more to the guys, ignore the girl. Try to get a feel for the dynamic between girl and co-worker but don’t ask beta questions. Alone with your girl later in the evening, fuck the shit out of her doggy style.

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  34. I should clarify that in not going up to her directly and going to the bar first, the point isn’t to linger until she notices me. I envisioned her sitting facing the bar and to me, coming up from behind and breaking in to an ongoing convo empty handed seems kinda puss.
    By going to the bar first, I do a couple things.
    1. I get a chance to survey the situation for a couple more moments.
    2. I put her in a different frame from a distance when she sees me.. ‘Oh, there you are.’
    3. I get a drink without having to reach in between them.
    That was my thinking anyway, and I’ve done this plenty of times.

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  35. “Someone coming in and telling them what one is “supposed” to do or reminding them of proper etiquette comes across as a wet blanket.”

    I’m not telling her what to do? I’m not saying shit. I’m just going to say hi and stand there with a bit of a shit-eating grin like, ok, you set up this social situation, let’s see you get out of it. Dollars to donuts, she’s going to be looking at you with a similar grin, thinking, ok, you’ve been nailing me for two months, let’s see how you handle this desired by other guys aspect. Basically, it’s a most unusual social situation, which she purposefully set up or let happen, either consciously or unconsciously, as a shit-test. I agree saying, “uh, honey, you’re supposed to introduce me to your friends” is wet blanket. If it came to it, I might introduce myself. But you must agree, that if she tells you to meet her somewhere, and you arrive alone while she is engaged in conversation with more than the expected number of guests, whom you didn’t know anyway, then introductions fall to her —and, if she’s too whacked out or too testy to figure that out, then you and her have a problem, true?

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  36. “If I were a guy, I’d walk up to my girlfriend and say “hey babe” and then put my hand on the small of her back or lay it on her thigh, since she is sitting down. Then I would wait for her to respond. Next the two of you will probably hug.

    Finally, I would wait for her to introduce me to the gentleman and get the background info on who they are.”

    That is the standard play and it’s not a terrible move. But constantly doing the expected move (and this is what you would expect your man to do) is a surefire way to make a relationship boring.

    The opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s boredom. Doing something that might make your girl uncomfortable can (in the appropriate doses) be better than doing what she would expect you to do.

    “I would think you were a a bit nutty.”

    But look at that frame. Who are you now thinking about? You are now distracted from the conversation, trying to figure out what I am doing or even what the hell is wrong with my idiot ass. But you are certainly thinking about me.

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  37. P.S. How do you do that quoting stuff?

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  38. @sweet1

    “don’t let them detect your intentions on the girl. ”

    Um, what? This is someone I’ve been dating for months. How could they not know I’m banging her? Why should I attempt to conceal it?

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  39. 1) Go up, put your hand in small of back/shoulder, kiss her, say, “Hey Babe sorry I’m late.”
    2) Observe reaction of entire table, including girl.
    3) Address table, “Looks like theres room for one more” with pleasant smile.
    4) Be normal.

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  40. on December 8, 2009 at 11:18 am Cannon's Canon

    if they are sitting around a table as you draw near, i’d approach opposite the girl, in between the two guys. since they are laughing and smiling, i would want my facial expression and vocal tone to mirror that positivity. say hello and make eye contact with everyone, but don’t instigate the handshakes or name-exchanges. no territory marking should be necessary with your girl, since you’ve been banging her a few months.

    in general, you should be risk-adverse to looking like a jealous tool. your biggest potential gain in this dynamic is endearing yourself to the coworker so that he either 1. backs off of any ideas 2. speaks highly of you to your girl the next day.

    if the girl is sitting at the bar perpendicular to your approach, i’d actually walk past her to order a drink next to the further friend, outside hand on the bar, facing them at an angle while i waited. when i figure out which guy is the coworker, i’d isolate him with some rapport-building and leave the girl to her devices with the other she presumably knows less well.

    also, i would definitely apprise the room for a two- or three-set to pull into our group as soon as some kind of opinion had been split.

    overall: don’t appear jealous, focus initially on the co-worker, and shoot your girl a wink every now and then, maybe purse your lips at her like the dudes on Jersey Shore.

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  41. I’d saunter in, toss a ‘hey babe’ to the chick. I might touch her while doing so, I might not. Too many variables that werent outlined in your description Roissy. More details next time. Jesus fuck you’re getting sloppy.

    I’d then lock eyes with each of the dudes, and wait for an introduction. She would make the intro, because I’m dating her…and I wouldnt date a gal that doesnt.

    If however she moves for a shit test and doesnt make the intro, I’d do it myself. And, contrary to what others are saying, I’d introduce myself to the more beta of the men first…turning my back on the lesser beta. I’d then turn and introduce myself to the latter, but wouldn’t make small talk with either. They would quickly seek my approval, and she my attention.

    One or both of the men would stand for me, and I would take the seat that would be offered.

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  42. Karl Smith, apart from the idea you greet people you know and let them make introductions, generally women have social precedence over men.

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  43. Rois,

    Could you please let us know whose anecdote you find the best?

    Thanks,

    T

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  44. I’d walk up to the group from an angle.

    If she sees me first, she’ll get up and say,

    “Hey panther! (hug) you made it. hey this is dude1 and dude2.”

    I introduce myself and then stand next to one guy while facing the other. She’s 45 degrees from me.

    If she doesn’t see me (most likely). I walk up to the group with a devilish grin and say something funny and ridiculous to one of the guys like we were old buddies.

    “hey boy, you looking mighty good in them jeans”. (in mr T voice)

    laughs.

    She turns, sees me and….does intro bs.

    At this point it’s my party. Make the boys laugh, tease her, tease the boys. I let her come closer to me if she wants.

    Have a couple drinks with the group and then tell them I gotta take off.

    At this point, she will either say she’s coming with me or that she’ll text me later.

    the end.

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  45. I would start to walk up, order a drink, point to an open table or booth, as in to say to the waiter, “I want you to bring it over there”. Then I’d say hi to my girl. She’d introduce everyone. I’d be polite and cordial with a firm handshake for both, but not try-hard. Then I’d say let’s sit over there, nodding my head towards the open table/booth. I’d take my girlfriend’s hand and lead her to the spot she will be sitting. I’d sit first if it were a booth, as I like to lean back on the wall/back of the booth for comfort. If it is a chair, I’d do the same except no wall. I’d order some food and eat while talking. Continue talking and joking and having a grand ol’ time. Socialize with them and other people, even maybe asking opinions of other groups about subjects you are talking about. If they happen to be women and you happen to flirt with them, great. After you are done with dinner and drinks, go outside for a couple smokes and if there happens to be a beautiful woman out there smoking, I would continue to flirt and converse as we re-entered the bar. Nothing too big. Then head to the bathroom to wash my hands, face, and grab some mints. This altogether should have taken at least an hour and a half. She had probably been there for a half hour before I got there. So When I return to the table, I suggest we head out as I am full and ready to head home. I call a cab, she and I enter, and we go to my place where we fuck like animals.

    The overarching theme here is my comfort and my fun. Nothing she can do can phase me. There does not have to be a table or booth. It can be another location at the bar. The main thing is that I am comfortable, honest, and fun. No need to sneak into another man’s chair. Just move the group into a situation that works for you. No need to eat, but I’m usually eating if the food at the bar is good. Anyway, you get the idea.

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  46. @ entrepoon, the quoted person was talking to Cliff, not you.

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  47. LOL @ the over-thinking here, too many of these responses reek of insecurity. Don’t change your behavior towards your gf/fuck buddy because of others.

    Go straight up to them and say hi. Don’t go in for a hug or kiss, let her make that move for you. She might feel weird with PDA in front of her co-worker/whoever the other guy is so let her make that choice. She should immediately introduce everyone; if not, make the first move and introduce yourself to them. Ask if anyone needs a drink and order yours. It’s that simple.

    The goal is to be congruent in front of the girl (which hopefully at this point is acting like a man). If you act over-protective/defensive/unusually aggressive your girl will pick up on it.

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  48. Tough one. I started to write about one situation in particular but then realized I’ve been in situations like this a few times. Each time has been a little different though. A lot depends on the venue, the girl, the guys and where they are located inside the bar. I’ll just note what I did and let somebody else generalize.

    If I go, I’ll usually get a drink on my own and chat up people for 20 or 30 minutes first when I’m meeting a girl out. Then I will make my way around to the girl, say hi, tease her about something, then tell her to introduce me to her friends.

    One time I remember the girl I was meeting was seated at a table away from the bar. By the time I made my way to her, it was time for another drink so I grabbed her to get drinks with me. When we came back, I sat down in her previous seat and let her face me. (There were no other chairs.) She had been holding court with her back against the wall and everybody facing her, so now that was my position and it worked out ok. I hadn’t actually slept with that girl at that point.

    I remember one time a situation with a girl I had slept with a few times but didn’t know very well. She was at the bar with some guy friends and they were pouring on the cold shoulder. I was getting tooled. I did not like it at all. No extra stools at the bar, no room. The girl and the guys were all several inches taller than me (I’m short) and the guys were definitely “defending” her. I was pushed out and couldn’t figure out a way to get in without trying too hard. So I went to a different area of the bar to drink and think about it and ended up talking to other girls. The girl came to where I was shortly after and then her guy friends followed.

    One time this also happened at a busy, loud club. I didn’t even bother dealing with her friends. It was too loud to do introductions and such. I just pulled her onto the dance floor and started making out with her.

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  49. Walk up to them, say hi to her, introduce myself to the guys and shake their hands firmly, making eye contact. I won’t greet the girl i’m dating with any huge sign of affection or “ownership”, because not only is it too much awkward PDA in the context of the situation, it would look insecure. Introducing myself to the guys could potentially look like i’m being territorial as well, but it’s better to at least show a little boldness and indicate how i’m not waiting for her lead on things.

    After that it I would attempt to maneuver things to a table instead of the bar – being on the end would require me to lean in for anything they’re saying or it would put me on the outside of their conversation. Carry things on casually.

    If she’s not happy to see me, things are different. The best attitude to take would be to react slowly – overgaming her to try to beat these other guys, or going over and flirting with another girl immediately would probably be interpreted as fear of losing her to these other guys. Act like nothing is wrong, be relaxed, and slowly and subtly get her laughing and remembering the relationship you guys have. The worst things you could do would be to react quickly or to leave if she’s not happy to see you – that would be admitting defeat. If she’s not worth it, fine, but it’s probably a worthy challenge to take up anyways, just for the sake of improving your game.

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  50. Go up give her a brief greeting, take a drink from her beer and invite everyone to move to a table/ booth. Bingo, you break up their conversation and if you a lucky the interloper leaves. If he doesn’t go, you at least have a chance to gain control of the restarted conversation, and improved seating arrangements. From here just be an asshole and maintain a reasonably high energy level.

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  51. why are you “dating” an attention whore who makes rapport with men disrespectfully and acts single when you aren’t around?

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  52. 1. Before you go in have an alibi buddy call you 10 minutes from when you shoot him a text. Have the text prepared so you can shoot it off in your pocket once you assess the situation.
    2. Spot a cute girl, a 6 or a 7 (this is important) on the path between you are your girl.
    3. Make eye contact with your girl and smirk as you saunter over. Take your time, you own the room.
    4. Flirt with the cute girl in passing.
    5. When you get there say hey babe, “I can’t stay long I have to do something with XXX.” (An alibi buddy)
    6. Turn to the guys, say “So which one of you is like her brother at work? I’m XXX by the way, its nice to meet you.” Shake hands firmly.
    7. Turn around with your back facing them and order a beer.
    8. Turn back around and ask if she was telling them the story about XXX, slight neg for her.
    9. Ask the guys a couple of qualification questions, and control the conversation until your alibi buddy calls you at the prearranged time.

    From here it can go one of two places. If she is trying to use them to make you jealous, or they really are just friends and not a threat, proceed as follows. If she wants to leave then go to 10a.
    10. Answer the phone in the middle of the conversation and say, “Yeah I’m headed out now. No she won’t care, she is talking to a couple of guys. Yeah, I think it will be a blast as long as it isn’t like last time with that Italian chick. Later.”
    11. Kiss her quick and say, “Sorry babe gotta run. Duty calls. Nice meeting you guys. (say this as you use the claw maneuver on the most alpha of the guys)
    12. As you leave look over your shoulder and tell her to not worry about waiting up for you.
    13. Flirt in passing with a more attractive girl than you did coming in.
    14. Come home to a tingling gina.

    10a. Answer the phone and say, “Yeah I’m headed out now. What? Oh yeah I’ll ask if she wants to come.” Turn to your girl and say, “Hey XXX wants to know if you want to come with us. We’re going to be painting the town red, raising hell, the usual.”
    11a. Say, “It was nice meeting you guys.” Pat the More Alpha on the shoulder twice, and leave.
    12a. If she is all over you reward her by letting her take your arm as you walk out.

    If one of the guys offers you his seat, DON’T take it. It is Beta bait. Betas take handouts from Alphas. The correct response is to dismiss him with your hand and say, “Nah I gotta run soon.” Lean with your back against the bar. Stealing the seat is acceptable. Alphas take what they want.

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  53. Such a tight situation. No stool waiting empty. She’s surrounded, and confortable with that.

    In my perception, whatever you do need the effect of channeling maximum attention. There is no worse scenario than arriving, and being poorly adressed by all, specially the woman (e.g.: she leaves you standing there, and decides to finish her point before regarding you properly). Even worst case: she waits for one of the men to finish his point.

    The collective body language tells me its likely to happen. Even in the case that the guys are the most beta, they are likely to perceive you as an intrusion (given the fact they are “guarding the pussy” in the way they are arranged around her).

    Since you are banging the girl, you have all right to assume Dick Priority on her.

    Its not clear wether she is turned to the bar or to the lobby.

    I find the first option more confortable: I’d walk to them, and run my index finger in the back of her neck. It assures immediate awareness of my presence, and since I’m banging her and will continue to do so, she is likely to turn (to see who touched her) in surprise and greet me (instead of frowning and bitching if I was a stranger). To wich I respond, and greet the gents right after.

    A table with sufficient chairs nearby is an option? In case yes, in the first minute of contact, I say “Looks like We need more space. Lets move to that table.”

    Its not impossible that one of them decides to leave the group (seen that before), and you have a free stool.

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  54. These responses get moar ghey by the minute.

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  55. Go up casually kiss her, keep hand-on-the-women contact while making some small talk, let ’em know who she had that hot, red lipstick on and was waiting for (without giving ’em the hey-get-offa-my property Randy Savage stare, be cool).

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  56. I’d be careful about not overgaming this one. Jamila makes a good point- guys are perceptive about signs of ownership. Walk up to the group amiably, say ‘hey babe’ to the girl, touching her somewhere that shows to the others that she’s yours (thigh, small of back, arm). Don’t go too far out of your way to make a display of it. Don’t let the touch linger. Be brief then let go. And nothing too big – no full on hug, no kiss. Remember, you didn’t just stumble upon her talking to two dudes- she invited you out after all. You go in with the upper hand.

    I definitely disagree with the idea that you need to wait to be introduced to the other guys. If she doesn’t go into intros immediately, do it for her. The idea is to take some control. Be friendly in the way that you know you have nothing to fear. Tell a funny story about something that happened to you today, talk about the amazing beer selection, whatever.

    No need to be jealous or to go asshole. Unless I’m missing something.

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  57. A few points I forgot. Go in high energy. You’ll shoot yourself in the foot if your come in as the downer of the group.

    The sitting arrangement really works against you. I’d probably try to suggest grabbing a booth AFTER talking for a bit. That way you have time to make yourself alpha, so everybody will follow you without really thinking about it. Grab your girls hand as you lead the group to a booth so you don’t risk now sitting next to her.

    Naturally, flirt with the bartender and waitress, but nothing too heavy.

    And what about the last Test of your Game results??

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  58. A lot of these responses are trying too hard to be alpha. If you’re actually alpha, then you’re not threatened by two guys talking to a chick who you’ve already banged. There’s a good chance that the guy invited her out, she’s not interested, and she invited you along to scare him off.

    Walk over at a measured pace. Try to get her to notice you before you get there so that you don’t have to hover around them. If she doesn’t notice, immediately put your hand on her back and get her attention. Greet her in the usual way. I like the one-armed hug and a warm but not toothy smile.

    This part is important, I think. If her face lights up when she sees you, then you’re coming to the rescue. If she looks a bit surprised or perturbed, then she was enjoying herself with these guys. In the latter case, you may want to jettison as soon as possible.

    If she’s glad to see you, then casually look at each guy and say, “Who are your friends?” During or immediately after the introductions, say, “Hey, [chick’s name], grab me a beer, will you? It looks like I need to catch up.” Establishes social dominance over the woman, plus you don’t need to reach over the bar. Proceed as usual after that.

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  59. @JPIrving – Nice. I wish I had thought of that. You’re basically reframing the entire situation to fit what you want rather than just playing with what they give you.

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  60. There’s no need to approach any of them.

    Walk in and sit down somewhere there are seats for 3.

    Call the girl and tell her you’ve just arrived and got a seat.

    Since you’ve already worked things properly for the past few months, she will come to where you are, at your request.

    The game begins when she sits and the two remaining guys shuffle to get the seat.

    At this point the girl is going to have to make some kind of introduction.

    Allow the girl to be in the awkward situation with her friend and this other guy, and if these two men are indeed trying to move in on the girl, let them try to out-alpha each other.

    Sit and observe. Be yourself, and order a drink.

    For some additional fun, you can vary the seats around you to one or three more.

    With room for only 2, you’re being a dick, but hey, you can tell the guys sorry, I didn’t know this was a party, pull up a seat! Move the other seat at the table beside you for the girl to sit at.

    With a table for 4, your girl will sit with you with the other two guys across the table. You’ve accomplished your position without having to make it look exceedingly so.

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  61. I had a similar scenario, though different in the big way that my woman was being approached by a dude she has no interest in.

    It was right after I got married and we went to a party where I knew very few people. Two of her single girlfriends came with us. Yes, I entered with three good looking young women. I do make good entrances.

    Anyway, the host and I left for thirty minutes for a liquor run, and when I returned, my wife asked if I could get rid of some dude who keeps hitting on her and the two other girls. She said this in our native language, so he did not understand, even though he was right next to the girls on the couch.

    I recognized him from earlier during the party — the type who thinks he’s alpha, but girls find him amusing in small doses and annoying in big dosed. Basically harmless, but looked alpha enough.

    So I sat next to him on the couch, put my arm around him in a veeeery friendly way, and asked him with a biiiiiiig smile:

    “You see these three cute girls? guess which one is my wife?”

    His face went paper white and he mumbled something. I think the word “wife” hits a man more viscerally — like it’s a different level of seriousness — than the word “girlfriend.”

    Later on, he came up to me a couple times, and tried to act nice, like we’re cool. No prob. He was nice enough, and utterly neutralized as AMOG threat.

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  62. Amazing how the “Game” mindset can sabotage normal social interactions. Most responses so far show huge levels of paranoia and insecurity. These guys might be threats and this might be a shit test, but over-reacting will reveal your insecurity and possibly create a loss of social value in her eyes.

    Walk over. Say hi to her and the guys. If she is positioned so you can do so w/o being clumsy or awkward you should touch her arm, thigh etc., but a small and subtle gesture. Then wait to see how she responds. Let her come to you looking for a hug, kiss or other more obvious display. Mindset should be YOU testing HER. Reward good behavior and punish bad.

    Talk to the guys directly and casually. Do not introduce your self, let her do it. If she doesn’t introduce them, then ask, implying or subtly stating that she is being rude, but don’t make a big deal out of it (slight neg + everything she does is cute). If the guys are interesting then talk to them. If not then focus on her. If the whole interaction is boring then you have to pull her. If she’s not complying then freeze her out and talk to the guys, and overtly ignore her for a bit, then leave.

    If she’s into you then she should follow your lead, physically and socially. Its a good test for her attraction and loyalty.

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  63. I’d approach the situation being confident and friendly, while sending subtle body language cues that she’s mine.

    For the approach, I’d walk up to them on her right side, cutting in between her and the guy on that side, tap her on the shoulder, and give her a hug her when she turns around, making sure to get my arms under hers so that my arms are around her waist and her’s are around my shoulders. This type of hug is more intimate than one where one of your arms is over hers, and generally the type that women give guys they’re sleeping with or want to sleep with.

    I’d then shake both guys’ hands, 1st the guy on my right, then the guy on my left, casually keeping my left hand on her waist the entire time. This is where positioning yourself on her right side becomes important. When you reach across her to shake the guy’s hand on her left side, you’re opening up your body to her, while forcing him to turn his back and close down.

    After the handshake, I’d take a sip of her drink. Depending on her personality, how I’m feeling, and the dynamic of the relationship at this point in time, I’d either play it straight by asking first and taking a sip, or fool around by asking for a sip and pretending to take a huge gulp, or taking a sip first and then asking. From there I’d order a drink and suggest a move to a table.

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  64. If you walk in and the situation is not what she said it would be (i.e.one man vs. two men) you are walking into a potential bear trap. Same thing if she said ‘one girlfriend’ and there are multiple cackling heinas around a table.

    Be acknowledged from a distance, but let her approach you. ‘Come over here’ signals should not be heeded. Smile and flirt as if this were the FIRST TIME you met her. This will likely produce anger and excitement.

    Sit down, sip a few beers. Acknowledge once, don’t stare or stalk. If she doesn’t come over, though luck, walk away. If she later badgers on why you didn’t come over, you can say you wanted to relax having a few beers and not go into ‘career’,’girlfriend’,’family’ discussions (apply whatever he cohorts are) as it appeared they were having.

    In short, if you feel up-handed by the people she’s with — which can be co-workers, girlfriends, gay-friends or family — its better to proceed with caution and keep things from a distance.

    Remember, no one gets dumped for being an asshole. It’s also wise to remember it can take days or weeks to get a woman in bed — depending on her quality — and seconds for her to dump you.

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  65. Roissy – After arriving 10minutes late, I would grab the first seat at the bar where there was some female presence/activity – order a drink and start flirting with the other girls. Acting as if you never saw your date in the sea of penis in the first place.

    You would think that (the way female minds work and what I’ve learned from you) she would see this in a damn new york minute.

    When she does come over, your social value with the girls you opened will rise (via social proof) because your date (unknown to them) just came over from 2 guys to talk to you.

    If she doesnt come over than you don’t care because you are chatting up 2 or 3 just as (if not more attractive girls) that you can work that night.

    and because

    “Expectations have been established. Not firm rules, but slowly congealing guidelines for acceptable behavior”

    this would be a perfect time to insert the guideline that you are going to talk to other girls, especially if she is talking to other guys. It’s a two-way street.

    Just my thoughts…
    3point5

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  66. since I’m there to see my girl, it doesn’t matter what angle or approach I come in at, remember the comfort is already established. If I come in face to face she’ll be happy to see me, if I come in and touch her back making her turn around, she’ll be happy to see me. I acknowledge her first, the guys there I don’t know so they don’t matter to me. Why shake hands and introduce myself to guys I don’t know and don’t care about.

    A hug will happen next, and then a compliment followed by a neg on my part. This isn’t done to attract her, but to show the other guys who I am and where I stand. They will be paying close attention.

    Now the girl should be making introductions. She should be introducing you to the co-worker first. If guy B is anybody she’ll introduce him as well. If he’s nobody then he gets no intro. If she doesn’t introduce, then kindly ask her who her friends are. Once intros are made, give a compliment to the guy/s like “nice shirt” forcing them to behave. Anything less from them will be low-value.

    last, I will excuse myself 10-15 min and leave her there with the guys to use the restroom to show lack of insecurity because…well…there shouldn’t be any in the first place.

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  67. Walk to your girl, stopping a few inches away but close enough to be able to turn to the men. Allow her to reach for you and, possibly, introduce you. Say “Hey” with a big alpha smile on your face then turn to one of the guys. It doesn’t matter which one. Say “What’s going on, man?” and give a hand on the shoulder to display dominance. At this point, if she hasn’t introduced you, she will have to, allowing you to get the ID of the men.

    Here’s why it doesn’t matter which on you talk to: First, there’s no way to know who the former co-worker is so spending even a nanosecond worrying about it is a waste of your time, a beta move and a sap of your confidence– worrying about an impossible question. Besides, even if he is, he’s a potential rival until you can disarm him and/or make sure he’s benign. The other man is either another coworker, bar orbiter or friend of some sort. Consider a rival until proven otherwise but no need to be defensive about it b/c you have already established dominance. Either way, by showing you don’t care who they are, you have immediately established further dominance. You are not being confrontational or anything and this will be instantly communicated to the men.

    If one of the men is an interloper, looking to get in with your GF, he has been neutralised. If both are benign, it doesn’t matter anyway but now they won’t get any ideas. And if on the off chance one is of value to you (i.e. a future business contact) you are expressing all the attitudes and behaviors of someone people want to be around.

    Feel free to tool the guys a bit too (dare they call it a neg?). This will show you are fun and crank up the gina tingle in your girl.

    At this point you should be on autopilot as you have established the frame. The guys will respect you, if not like you, and your girl will be hot for you. Any more details needed here are not my problem but rather your desire for too much clarity. (How’s that for alpha?)

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  68. hmm… Brasserie Beck? St. Bernardus ON TAP!

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  69. I like lucious’s ideas.

    honestly I don’t know why you overthink this so much … a normal person would come up to her, make friends with the guys assuming they are someone in her life, make a good impression, then get busy with something and let her reopen you. the end.

    you should be making friends thats the best way to get laid

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  70. I’d swoop ten more girls in the bar right in front of this girl and she would be long forgotten by the next morning.

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  71. “…and she wants you to come out and meet her at the bar.”

    This is your first mistake.

    If there’s expectations, and this sounds like it’s an LTR (or LTR in the making) then it’s time to alter them to include the fact that you will pick her up and take her to this kind of event.

    Your response should have been “great, when should I pick you up?” An added benefit is that you’re her transportation and so she will need/want to leave when YOU are ready to go.

    If she balks at this, then you’ve sniffed out the shit test. Suddenly your busy that night. And, for the next few nights (even couple of weeks).

    She needs to get used to the idea that your in charge of her social comings and goings. Not fully at first, of course, but eventually she needs to be under your control (and she needs to like it, too).

    If you don’t do this, then you can assume she’s slutting around on you. If you don’t do this, then there’s no hope of an LTR that you want to be a part of. Guy “friends” and “coworkers” need to be knocked down a peg in her eyes. If you don’t do this, then she will constantly use them to test you – i.e. she will be keeping and eye out for something better. She needs to understand that YOU ARE IT. Period.

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  72. now HERE is a typical situation:

    you see a girl passing by you on the street. She is gorgeous, probably a model coming back from shopping on her day off. What do you do? OK GO

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  73. @MeMyselfI … isn’t that a bit hypocritical — if Roissy is sleeping around with a dozen women, why do all these women have to be banging only him for months?

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  74. Won’t go into to much detail, but the keys are locking in and then moving the group.

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  75. there’s not an issue unless one of the guys creates one. the guys are of no consequence to you as you are the top dog here. you’ve penetrated her, they haven’t…they can smell your dick if they really want to find out.

    i walk up to my girl, put my hands on the back of her shoulders, give her a hello squeeze. say “what’s up, how’s it going”.

    there will be a lull in the conversation at which point i interject without being introduced. firm, normal, handshake with eye contact. genial conversation with both guys.

    i proactively move the party to a spot that is more accomodating to me, with a fourth chair. i say hey, why don’t we sit over there. you’re moving the frame of the whole group, leading them in a new direction. your needs are at the forefront.

    if she puts up a fight and is unaware of the precarious situation, she’s an idiot and/or doesn’t give two shits about you. your relationship is worthless. if you’ve been hitting it right and she’s into you, she’ll seek to accomodate you first and foremost.

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  76. Amazing how the “Game” mindset can sabotage normal social interactions. Most responses so far show huge levels of paranoia and insecurity.

    I think one reader would pull out his machete at this point.
    Anyway:
    Instinctual Lesser A/Greater B reaction, “boyfriendliness?” That’s a feature not a bug…go up to group, don’t skulk in bar, put hand on girl’s arm/shoulder, butt, etc., get the general amount of PDA you would normally generate then ask, “who are your friends?” then meet the dudes. I would have the girl turn around to face you as I prefer to stand and I don’t want to talk to her back.

    As for alpha…it’s your world, baby. Since guys are just ugly girls, win the men, win the women.

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  77. First thing I gotta make sure I don’t start thinking too much, so for better or for worst I walk towards the group as soon as I spot them.

    Big friendly, smiling “What’s Up GUYS!”
    —I position myself in-front of the girl, and put one hand on each guys shoulder. Stop smiling, make eye contact with both guys, but maintaining a friendly facial expression.

    At the same time let go of the guys shoulders’ turn to one extend the hand and introduce myself,
    “How you doing man, I am Havana?”
    —–If he respond to my greet:
    “Nice to meet you”
    -then turn to the other guy
    —–If he hesitates to respond to my greet:
    -then turn to the other guy

    “The name is Havana, chief”
    —–If he responds to my greet:
    “Nice to meet you too”
    -Touch the girl on her left arm (I am right handed), starts smirking
    —–If he doesn’t respond
    -Touch the girl on her left arm (I am right handed), start smirking

    Now I give her a 1/2 second to initiate some kind of response…

    …regardless of how she responds next, or if I have to initiate the short introduction with her…

    -leave my hand on her arm, and move right next her plowing my way in between her and the dude on her right.
    -Meanwhile lift the hand as I and reach over to her other shoulder.
    -Rest my back against the bar, and give her a slight but brisk pull.
    -Big ass grin to finish it off

    Then chill the facial expression, and find out what the groups dynamics are.
    -How do they know each other?

    As I receive the answer I let GO of the girl. And depending on how the group is going I either join the existing conversation, OR start a new conversation.

    A few minutes into the talk as one of the guys is talking, I ask her to order me a (whatever I feel like having at the moment) beer.

    Like


  78. Chuck wins. EOT

    Like


  79. on December 8, 2009 at 12:44 pm Higher-order thinking

    Before she notices you, quickly find your way to the back area and from there to the storage room. Pry open the intake grate on the ventilation shaft and shimmy your way back to their location. Taking the magnesium blowtorch out of your coat, create an opening – quietly – and asses the situation.

    The guy who is closer to her, who engages in subtle touching and appears to be trying to work something – drop down from the ceiling, feet first, and aim for his head. Hopefully you roll out of the hit and get on your feet quickly – take the now vacant seat, order a drink, kiss the female on the cheek and say “I just dropped by to say that I refuse to play by your shit-test rules. Now get the fuck out of my face.”

    Like


  80. In this situation, you should have already known that she is testing you, by telling you to come meet her with some friends. In this case you

    1. As soon as you walk into the place start flirting/chatting up random girls/guys(she WILL notice) especially if your in a place like busboys and poets.

    2. Walk towards hug/kiss. She’ll introduce you. Put you arm around her and say “hey babe” grab a stool, start chatting up the guys. Don’t acknowledge her. Take the glory for everything they do. They tell a story, you finish it. Excuse yourself, start flirting with other girls again for about 5mins where she can see you. Get a phone number, where she can see you. Come back and finish where you left off

    Like


  81. Upon approach I would say hi to the girl first then immediately take the initiative to shake the hands of the other two guys.

    Through the eventual convo I would learn who is who all the while watching her out of the corner of my eye to see how she behaves.

    My first reaction upon seeing them is: Shit test. She is looking to play the three of you into some sort of jealous game. She is looking for attention and with you there, she now has three satellites with which to use to get her attention needs met. My overall demeanor would be relaxed and somewhat aloof/not caring too much to pay attention to her. I’ve already banged her so there is not much else to prove. If she is trying to get you to commit to exclusivity by making you jealous through these games then she has shown you how low value she really is.

    Like


  82. Any higher than usual cockiness, shoulder taps, PDA’s would come off as insecure, on the other hand there’s a thin line to thread – as long as you don’t come off as insecure, that’s what tingles are made of. So subtle dominance signs – not leaning over, not putting foot forward, assuming space. I’d make her stand up as you meet her – leave some distance, extend hands, kiss her on cheek – but again, no “ownership” PDA’s. Vibe toward guys – friendly, but slightly arrogant and aloof.
    That’s assuming it’s a normal friendly situation. If there’re any bad signs, I’d go caveman – either “OK, let’s bounce” after meet&greet or “I’m gonna get a drink, make sure these tools aren’t here when I’m back”.

    Like


  83. This situation happens a lot to me, either i am the host or i am the new one, in either way, not really boyfriend related but in general. If i am the newcomer, i would let the host do what he/she should do, and i wouldn’t help out to much, i wouldn’t make jokes or playing along, but be polite and later on, when i got to know the new people, i would either make jokes, or whatever that is good for the moment.
    If i would be the host, i would introduce everybody, search for a table, and make everyone at ease, i would try to be a bit overly polite, as i am the one that brought the scenario up.
    What is interesting in these situations is that you can learn a lot about your partner, weather she/he is the host/newcomer, is rude and terrible in general, that is saying sth, i think a lot is revealed by a nervous person about his/her basic personality, so i think this is a great opportunity to learn more about your gf/bf or friend.

    Like


  84. arrive 15 min later. walk there, touch the girl on her shoulder or the base of her neck (where neck and back meet) and greet everyone with “g’evenin’ ladies”.

    then make sure the girls turns around (facing me, supposing she was facing the bartender), kiss her on her cheek and introduce myself to the guys, first on my right than the other one.

    now i have the girl in front of me and the two guys on the sides; i switched from being an outsider to being central. i joke that next time she should bring along two female friends rather than two boys and sarcastically say “sorry guys but i know you get me”.

    order a beer and have the girl pay for it.

    i’ll take it from there depending on circumstances…

    PS this exercise would be more useful if roissy would later give us an assessment of what we are saying. at least you could comment on most common mistakes and suggest optimal strategies…

    Like


  85. Even as you walk over, you are trying to figure out how to get a well-placed barstool. Greet her as normal. This should involve some touching and a kiss (I say “should” not for the purposes at hand, but just that they should for the relationship in general). You exchange quick pleasantries with her for 5-10 seconds – you re-establish your connection, subtly reinforce to her (and the men) that you control her attention, and you make them wait. Right now, you’re trying to bring the energy level down a bit.

    You introduce yourself (first name only, firm handshake, polite smile but eyes searching for the bartender) to whichever man seems to be the higher status (Man #1), then to the other man (Man #2; same introduction but with eye contact). I’m assuming we will have honed instincts for properly identifying which man is higher status. You don’t consult her, or reference her, at all during the introductions. They will probably not say how they know her, but if they do, all the better.

    Now your primary goal is to get a well-placed barstool. This is the hardest part. Best: Take Man #1’s somehow. Second best: Take Man #2’s. Third best: Take girl’s. Fourth: grabbing a spare. Unacceptable: standing. Taking the girl’s is easiest and displays some good traits but she will end up standing opposite you, between the two men, standing; this is tactically bad. Taking Man #1’s displays better traits, separates him from the girl, and positions you for kino.

    This is the part I’m most unsure of (very unsure). I would point at his stool, make eye contact, and ask, “You mind? My legs are killing me.” I’m hoping to dangle some status in front of him if he gives me the stool. You can come off as low-status as necessary while asking this, because you will more than make up for it with the positional advantages it offers. The key to this working is that you came in sufficiently high-status that he will take the bait.

    If this works, you are set; you have too many advantages to lose.

    If you don’t get Man #1’s barstool, you still need a barstool. Get one.

    Whatever you do, don’t let them continue what they were talking about. Thanks to you, the set’s energy should be lowered from when you first saw them; now your job is to bring it back up on your terms. Tell a story. This story’s DHV spikes should highlight wealth and authority, as opposed to preselection.

    Like


  86. After introductions are made, the hostess can smooth the conversation by bringing Roissy onboard, “Roissy, we were discussing whether the penny should be eliminated from our currency.” or, “Roissy, we’re discussing how insulting MPT would be.” If she fails to bring him onboard, he can ask, “what conversation have I missed.?”

    Like


  87. Ooooh been there done that

    Walk to your girl, if she notices you, and since the dynamics have been established, she will probably get up and give you a hug. If she didn’t – come up to the bar and say “now the party can really start”. At this time she will notice you and proceed to get up and give you a hug.

    Now, after the greet hug, you grab her hand, spin her around as if she was showing off in front of you, then take her seat.

    “Gotcha, that’s the only way to get a seat at this crowded ass place”. Everyone laughs, you get a drink, she pouts adorably. Then, you sit back turned to the bar in your new stool, chat everyone up. Just plain old normal conversation. As soon as one of the gentlemen leaves for the bathroom, jukebox or smoke break, your girl will take his seat.

    A little overdone, I know, but I am basically like a large child when I game, and it works for me

    Like


  88. I’m with MeMyselfI: If it’s a last second request (say, that afternoon/evening), i would have returned the call (I’d never pick up if I’m at work, so she’s leaving a message) and tell her “you’ll have to leave that request with my secretary, who i am presently fucking on my desk. get a little tipsy, I’ll be wanting dessert later” – i’m not concerned with her meeting a former co-worker because 1) they apparently don’t ever hang out anymore, and 2) she called him a co-worker as opposed to ‘boss’ – so he probably has no sway over her. Plus, this is seemingly several months into a good relationship which she stands to lose if she starts fucking around (and as a result, her friends will also shame her for being a moronic slut).

    But if we’ve gotta run this hypo, I start with the assumption that her ‘friend’ wants to fuck her: no guy hangs out with women they wouldn’t want to fuck.

    The second guy throws me off – he can’t be some random dude at the bar, so I deduce that is’s very probable that he’s either a good friend with her ex-co-worker or a friend who also randomly happened to be at that bar at that time (great bar with great SWPL beer, so it’s not too improbable).

    I also know that it’s up to her to introduce me to her friend(s). I know that immediately introducing myself to them lowers my status: they should be introducing themselves to me, as they’re enjoying my woman’s time (and therefore, bedroom time).

    Hopefully by this point I’ve got the presence and frame-control whereby she’d jump out of her chair and come run up to me.

    If not, or if she doesn’t see me until I get close, I’m going to base my action on the assumption that she’s at the bar sitting on a bar stool. So basically, I am going to be pulling her arms out of her bar stool and planting a big kiss on her cheek, and whispering into her ear something to the effect of her looking fuckable this evening. I’d hold her attention and during this, pretend those other two dudes don’t exist in my world. This puts them in an awkward position: it’s highly likely they know who I am and my relationship with my girl. So I expect that, if my girl is not mindful that she should do the introductions, that at least one of the guys would introduce himself to me (to eliminate the awkwardness he’s feeling).

    My great character draws them in and they become a big fan of me. (who knows who they know- might be another chick I move onto).

    Like


  89. *pulling her arms to pull her off her barstool and into me

    Like


  90. on December 8, 2009 at 1:08 pm dirtyharrycallahan

    having not read any of the others yet:

    Enter, approach the bar away from the group – order your drink. Try to come up from an angle that only she can see you at, so she’s the first to notice your arrival. Ideally she should react and break whatever conversation they might be in to greet you.

    With the frame established, introduce yourself to the dudes (likely the former co-worker and one of his friends), suggest that everyone goes and grabs a seat (if this is even possible – you already have a drink so no need to linger at the bar/keep the poor power position.) Most likely everyone will defer to your choice of seating (since it was your idea) and you sit accordingly, for example if it’s a booth, she’s one one side pinned towards the wall, you’re next to her, two other guys are opposite.

    From there, talk with everyone, do you’re threat level assessment but you should be fine. If the guy is there with his buddy it’s unlikely he had greater romantic intentions (or even if he did the need for moral support should undercut any danger you sense from him) and you shouldn’t be the surly dick a lot of these comments usually advocate – it’s okay to take your foot of the gas pedal now and again.

    Like


  91. What would Tiger Woods do? (WWTWD?)

    That guy was reportedly fucking nine different women who were NOT his ex-swimsuit model wife. All poon-hounds should wear their zippers at half mast the day he passes away.

    Like


  92. @ 3point5

    -I dig your answer brah! Thing is, if you know the woman is going to be there, it’s hard to be dismissive for not knowing where she is – it’s presumed that you would look for her.

    However, if this was a situation where you let the girl know you’d be at that bar, and she had to find you, it’d be great for her to find you in the middle of a conversation with another woman for the purposes you’ve laid out.

    well said nonetheless

    Like


  93. @Gregory Magarshark

    – because those are his rules, and if that girl wants to be the chosen one, she’s gotta stick to them.

    Besides, what girl seriously thinks “well if he’s on the prowl, i should spread my legs for any john that walks near me’. Women don’t want to be fucked by as any men as possible – they know the problems with that and they’ve likely seen how sluts like that turn out. So even if Roissy is getting some side pussy, she’s not likely to relent by going out and doing the same.

    Like


  94. [leaning over the gap in 2 chairs with one arm on my girls chair and another on a guys]

    “you guys are sure making it hard to order a drink around here…” *smirk*

    “that lipstick really is a decent shade”

    before she has a chance to respond…

    “hey there, i’m dick fuel”

    at this point the girl is probably cued to intro me, but its already done.

    “so how do you all know each other” to group. attempt to stand back-to-bar if possible.

    [conclude opener]

    time passes. venue changes.

    fucking attention whoring jealousy provoking bitches do the walk of shame with a limp.

    Like


  95. You guys got it all wrong. Here is what you do: position yourself off to either the left or right of the group, whichever side places you furthest from the door and allows you to remain unnoticed. If you are able, order a drink, preferably a shot of courage aka whiskey. Drink it, fast. Then yell… “HE’S GOT A GUN.. HE’S GOT A GUN.. EVERYBODY OUT.. GET OUT.. HURRY.. .HURRRY” as loud as you can so everyone hears you, all the while you move towards your girl, whom you grab firmly by the arm so as to prevent her from joining the exiting masses. Naturally, everyone will heed your warning and run out the door(s), leaving just you and her, alone in the bar, all to yourselves. As the dust settles, you look deeply into her confused, panic-stricken eyes, while still able to sneak a look at whatever game is on the TV over her shoulder, and say in as calm a voice as possible one, but not both, of the following: (a) were those guys bothering you? or (b) now we have the whole place to ourselves (you somehow managed to lock the doors, excluding re-entry). Then jump over the bar – like in a western movie – and pour each of you a drink and without saying anything tip yours in her direction as if to convey, ‘Here’s lookin at you kid’.

    Like


  96. my approach side = the direction of her crossed legs/feet

    gotta play odds.

    Like


  97. @Derek: you got it right.

    The rest of you are clueless or insecure or both.

    Like


  98. Pull your pants down and run in between all three of them with a hardon like a screaming suicide bomber.

    Like


  99. Grab girl from behind, bend her backwards, give her a long slow wet french kiss, throw her back onto the bar stool, then say to her, “So, you come here often?”

    Like


  100. Vigilante, FTW.

    Like


  101. I think Higher Order has this one figured out.

    Seriously, the way some of you guys answer you’d just be shooting yourselves in the foot, putting yourselves on display as the douchebag tools you are for all to see. No woman wants a guy she can’t bring into social situations. Being the type of all around cool guy that people like to hang out with will do more for you than anything else. Whether you’re being talkative or laid back, an air of friendly confidence is the way to go.

    Like


  102. Did I forget to mention the previous post was a joke? Oops. You aspiring PUAs out there don’t try this at home this is only for the discombobulated souls of the wartorn society of the arabs.

    Seriously though all jokes a side.

    This is a major subconscious shit test that many guy’s girls pull.

    Think about (those of you that have actually been in a relationship) times when a girl would bring up a guy you don’t know, a previous sexual partner, and/or a previous boyfriend.

    Now, take this basic idea and throw it into the mix with this. She is asking YOU to meet her in a place with another guy. This is almost like you are her boyfriend but she wants you to know she has other freinds and other suitors…she wants you to value her.

    You do value her…but the better you are with women the more questions she will have in your mind…thus she will do things that make you chase her.

    I can’t tell you how many times a girl would do things like this to me in the past to test me out and see my reaction. I failed a lot of them not understanding what was really going on.

    This situation calls for delicate procedures. She wants to see if you can “hang” with her and others. She wants to see if you can handle others pursuing her.

    If she didn’t kiss me hello I wouldn’t pursue it or actively go after the hug. She is sitting afterall that would just result in an awkward half hug/kiss that looks desperate. For most part I agree with Derek’s interaction.

    I’d basically stop in have a drink. Dominate the conversation, but make sure not to make it obvious. I’d introduce myself politely and listen in to what they spoke about for a minute, thereby interjecting with a funny situation/story from my day/week…closing with I have to be going now I’ll talk to you later.

    It’s smart and simple. Stay too long and you will feel left out. Leave when she wants to leave and you relinquish some power to her. She knows you came there for her, are threatened and are waiting for her to leave. You leaving early shows that you trust her and also are not jealous/insecure to stay and watch, You, more importantly, have the confidence to know your place and not feel the necessity to intrude on a conversation that bores you anyway. You have better places to be. This is when you find other women to have in tow (if you don’t have them already…which you should).

    Good luck kangaroo jack.

    Like


  103. on December 8, 2009 at 2:07 pm Cannon's Canon

    what’s up lurker, you gonna go to this feministing happy hour with me on the 16th or what??

    Like


  104. on December 8, 2009 at 2:08 pm Smoking Cigar

    Sit opposite across the bar from her (if it is the wrap around type bar with the booze and bartenders in the center), smile and nob to her from that position…light up a cigar, order a cognac, hit on chicks sitting next to you. If she comes by to your position, introduce her to your new friends you’ve gamed…take all the chicks willing to go to your lair afterward.

    If the bar is not wrap around, approach her at an angle, and say “Hey” in your deep raspy voice, light up cigar, nod to bartender for cognac, and smile and say hello to the men flanking her while waiting for your drink. If the bartender is quick, radio silence until drink arrives, if not, talk a little – keep it brief, slight introductions, etc. Take drink and tell her you are going over there (point at some distance place – make sure chicks are in the vicinity), introduce yourself to the chicks, if she follows, introduce her, if not, continue to game chicks…take all willing back to your lair.

    The hunt must go on…fresh meat…mmm.

    If the bar is non-smoking, filled with liberal effeminate metrosexual douches bags claiming emasculating moral authority over your right to smoke, tell her you don’t do smokeless…and to meet you at your favorite cigar bar where smoking is cool – introduce her to your new female friends you’d been gaming when she comes by.

    Like


  105. on December 8, 2009 at 2:14 pm Rollo Tomassi

    If one of the guys offers you his seat, DON’T take it. It is Beta bait. Betas take handouts from Alphas. The correct response is to dismiss him with your hand and say, “Nah I gotta run soon.” Lean with your back against the bar. Stealing the seat is acceptable. Alphas take what they want.

    Damn, beat me to it. The seating is to your advantage in this scenario. Standing while others sit puts you in a position of implied dominance. Think about this the next time you’re in a meeting and you’re sitting while the boss is standing. High ground wins, sitting is submissive when others are standing.

    former co-worker is the key term in this test. Not current co-worker as others have assumed in this thread already. If she’s familiar enough with this guy from a prior job to agree to meeting him at a bar or club it’s safe to assume that he’s at the very least an orbiter. If she’s sprung this situation on you by surprise it is also a class A shit test. You’re on display for her, the familiar “former” co-worker and most likely another guy who’s familiar with her, the co-worker or both (it’s highly unlikely the 3rd guy met them that night at the bar).

    The challenge here is to pass the shit test, gather information about the orbiters, covertly let her know you know she’s shit testing and plant a seed of doubt in her head to prompt competition anxiety and swing the frame back to your control.

    Passing the test is actually the easiest part. Maintain verbal dominance, direct the conversation, do not appear fazed or “opt out” of anything. I say control the conversation because the former co-work and she will have a prior familiarity that is exclusive to them. If the 3rd guy is a co-worker as well you’re even more at a disadvantage in this respect since by default every topic of conversation will be inclusive of them and exclusive of you if you don’t direct it. I should also add that this is classic beta-orbiter game – covertly disqualify the Alpha that’s banging the female they want to poach.

    Their familiarity with your female aids you in gathering information. Law of Power #14: Pose as a friend, work as a spy. In polite social encounters, learn to probe. Ask indirect questions to get people to reveal their weaknesses and intentions. There is no occasion that is not an opportunity for artful spying. Make use of anything incriminating that could AMOG (with nuance) either orbiter, and make mental notes for effectively using any information that will covertly broadcast to your female that you KNOW she is testing you by engineering such an encounter with her and these guys.

    Finally, excuse yourself from their company once you’ve adequately displayed higher value and have the info you were after. There is no sex with the female on this occasion. If you’ve effectively made her acknowledge you know this set up was her design during the conversation, and her evaluation of you in it makes you the commodity, your absence will speak volumes. It cannot be a sulky retreat or some cock and bull obvious excuse – in fact any time you tactically withdraw you should always have a responsibly unavoidable reason for doing so. You have a job issue, your brother needs your help moving the next day, your family needs you at your grandmother’s bedside later, anything believably responsible. Remember, Law 16: Use Absence to Increase Respect and Honor. The more you are seen and heard from, the more common you appear. If you are already established in a group, temporary withdrawal from it will make you more talked about, even more admired. You must learn when to leave. Create value through scarcity.

    Your withdrawal is your statement to her that you will NOT be one of her orbiters. If your attention is valued, your takeaway will reinforce this value for her. In fact the longer you stay in her 3-man clatch the more you will seem like another of her orbiters.

    Like


  106. I thought the “slapping ass” was a joke when I first read it but its repeated enough that I have to believe some people are serious.

    I know there are different social circles and mores out here, but I am not going to slap some girl I’m dating’s ass in front of co-workers that I don’t know. I think you should assume that a bit of professionalism carries over to a post work setting unless you know otherwise.

    Like


  107. Or…show up with one olsen twin on each arm and say you can’t stay because you are going to the zoo.

    Like


  108. An alpha male is:
    1) a leader of men
    2) a protector of loved ones
    3) not threatened by other men

    Walk up with a chip on your shoulder and you violate #3 but satisfy #2. Walk up as if the guys are already your neutralized friends and you violate #2, but satisfy #1. The only way to meet all 3 criteria is to be cautiously friendly to the men and cautiously loving with the girl. Then, adopt a neutral, poker face and wait. It’s your girl’s responsibility through her words and body language to let you know if you need to be worried. If she fails, then you recall alpha male trait #4 and dump her.

    4) has an attitude of abundance

    Like


  109. She is asking YOU to meet her in a place with another guy. This is almost like you are her boyfriend

    I’m not? We were given that we’d been dating for months, how can I not be her boyfriend?

    I am not going to slap some girl I’m dating’s ass in front of co-workers that I don’t know.

    Does that mean that fondling her tatas in public is also off the table?

    Like


  110. Cannon’s Cannon: what? Feministin Happy hour? the 16th???? Holy Shnikes, part of me wants to go, and part of me thinks my head would assplode with all the illogical conspiracy bullshit coming out of their lesbain mouths.

    Like


  111. To Gregory:

    It’s not hypocritical.

    The whole goal is “multiple serial LTRs”.

    If she’s testing you, then your job is to figure it out before she can pull it off.

    Do you want a “harem”, or not?

    A girl in your harem cannot be pulling this shit. If she’s interested in a coworker, then she must “choose”. If she’s got guy friends, then she must “choose”.

    If you choose NOT to do this, then she will *sense* your betaness, and she WILL, eventually, sleep around on you. It will start with innocent socializing. Then it will be workplace flirting. Then, eventually, anything goes because you haven’t responded to it correclty. This is an unacceptable outcome. You are working to avoid it.

    She’s yours. She goes when and where you go. Period.

    If she resists this arrangement then she’s telling you she wants to keep her options open. The only correct response to this is MORE ALPHA. Show her the consequences of her choice. You’ve got options. You’re not worried.

    Like


  112. on December 8, 2009 at 2:40 pm Phenomenal One

    @ Karl Smith

    it should be professional up until the co-workers know that theres a difference between your woman at work and your woman in her daily life.
    and not to confuse the two.

    @ weatherhead

    to not become the 3rd guy entertaining her,
    it should be just 4 adults enjoying some time at a bar with each other.

    Like


  113. Another way to look at this is to assume that the entire premise for her letting you know that a former co-worker will be there is to shit test you into a jealous reaction. By showing up late you win already…

    OTOH, maybe the ex-co worker is a polesmoker and the other dude is the pole….. and the whole thing is a ‘girls’ nite out.

    maybe the best approach is to walk in rocking a three wolves T-shirt…..put some music in the box and treat everyone to some pulp fictionesque dance moves?

    its been a long day.

    Like


  114. I keep cringing at all of the repsonses…

    “Say this….”, “Say that…”. Slap this. Slap that. ETC. ETC.

    You ALL don’t get it.

    If you didn’t bring her with you, then *she’s* ARRANGED to be surrounded by men *she* LIKES in a social setting.

    She playing all of you against each other.

    If you agree to show up because *she* INVITES you then YOU HAVE FAILED.

    Period.

    The only way to pass this test is to insist on taking her to the event. If she declines, then you’ve learned EVERYTHING you need to know about her. She’s keeping her options open. So will you because you are ALPHA.

    Like


  115. Based purely on my experience here’s what I usually do in this sort of situations:

    You walk in, no rush, in a steady confident movement, towards her. You speak clearly and in normal tone, but you only address directly the girl.

    Do not initiate body movement as to lean over to kiss her or shake hands with the other men (that you do not know yet). Instead, you patiently expect the woman’s reaction to your arrival. Of course she will be glad to finally see you arrive and will put a big smile on her face. If she leans over to kiss you, just do it, no awkward movements. Otherwise, you do not initiate anything.

    Smile back at her while she greets you and start telling something in the general lines of “this must be one of those funny days; all taxi cabs seem to have disappeared from this city” as a conclusion for you being a bit late. While talking, just give a passing glance to the other men watching you. Put a relaxed smile on your face when you’re done saying your line.

    At this point you can expect comments on your line, coming from anyone around, and also possible smiles in return. As some sort of conversation will most likely take off, you patiently wait for the opportunity to be introduced to the other men at the bar, and shake hands as your name is being mentioned the woman. You do not introduce yourself. Just in case the conversation escalates and you’re still standing and waiting, you can say something in the general lines of “Well… aren’t you going to introduce me?”

    You will be offered a seat directly near the woman (one of the two will move over. It doesn’t matter who’s the co-worker at this stage – your clear body language showed that you are the man that she was waiting for, probably banging her too, so you will be shown proper respect and you will be placed near her, as you wait patiently, standing near her for one of them to move over.)
    After taking a seat at the bar, you can resume usual conversation with your girl, order a beer and befriend the other guys, whatever. You have established ranks so there’s no need to follow any strict rules anymore.

    So, in a nutshell: confident movement, projecting a clear posture, tone and message and waiting for reactions at certain key moments instead of pushing in with any awkward reactions like throwing yourself to kiss her like a desperate dog marking territory or throwing your arms to salute the other men, showing that you are insecure and looking for acceptance – which is not the way for an alpha to behave at all.) So there you go – simple, natural and efficient.

    Like


  116. on December 8, 2009 at 2:57 pm Stud Dynamite

    @ MeMyselfI

    you got a very good point, but only if she’s an LTR, even if harem, material. What if you just want to hit it few more times, i.e. that same night? (if you don’t, why even show up, bringing her with yourself or not).

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  117. @ Stud

    If you just want to hit it a few more times, then you are too busy to attend this kind of BS event. Hell, tell her you’ll be there eventually, then “forget” to attend. That would probably work best.

    Based on the description, however, I got the impression this is LTR or LTR possibility, i.e.:

    “The woman is someone you’ve been dating for a few months. Expectations have been established.”

    ETC.

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  118. on December 8, 2009 at 3:02 pm Phenomenal One

    also it seems like plans were already made for her and the former co-worker to meet and you’re just an add-on.

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  119. on December 8, 2009 at 3:06 pm Biting Beaver

    Let me tell you how it is done.

    Let assume that she saw me when i walked in. I will walk over straight to her with a rich smirk and controlled swagger. With my eyes totally focused on her…midway through my stride towards her….i will appear distracted ….indicated by me partially stopping in my tracks to glance/stare/check out another woman on my left or right, as the case may be. Then, i will resume my stride towards her, completely locking eyes with her, with same swagger/rich smirk. Completely ignoring the two men or women to her sides.(because, rest assured, she is checking out your eyes to see your reaction to her sitting next to those two wo(men).

    (Now…what comes next is important…and this is critical. This step must be followed to the letter.)

    (1)when i am about two or 2.5 paces from her…i will come to a complete stop…and then do a “come to papa” hand gesture, just like the one SILVIO did to michelle obama, with the same rich smirk on my face. It will be directed specifically towards her.

    (2) She will then rise to meet me, and kiss me or hug me. This will achieve an objective: it will leave her bar-stool where she has been sitting wide open–i need this to happen because i next intend to sit on that bar-stool with her sitting on my lap while i charm her two wo(men) companions. But of course, she doesnt know this at this moment.

    (3)After we hugged/kissed/whatever, i will gently move her, but surely move her to the side before letting go, then, swiftly, but deftly, stepped in front of her towards the two wo(men) so that she is behind me; and three things are in front of me:her bar-stool where she was sitting before she rose up to hug me, and the two wo(men) that are now front of me. My woman will be behind me at this stage. I have shifted myself inbetween her and the bar-stool and her co-workers.

    (4)Then, I will then step closer(completely blocking her direction to her barstool, shake hands with the two wo(men), after which, i will then turn around with my back directly next to the bar stool, smile widely at her, and in an enthused voice, ask her to sit on my lap(slap my thigh).(at that very moment….i will sit on the barstool).

    (5)Now you see the scene: i am sitting on the barstool with my lady on my lap; the two wo(men) are sitting to my left and right. Survey this scene and ask yourself? who is dominant archetype in this scene? Me. Why? (1) I am in the middle–center of attention (2)I have a woman sitting on my lap.

    (6)Without asking any silly “how you guys met questions”….I will immediately start engaging the two to both my left and right in witty, engaging conversation that focuses on things she has no interest in(i will know her interests…i have been with her)….e.g sports. cracking jokes…While doing this…i will gently start caressing her…gentle kisses on her back, etc…Occassionaly squeeze here and there…..If later she decide to use the bathroom or something, i will spank her as she gets up. Essentially, verbally, most of my conversation will be with her co workers, but my hands will be doing most of the conversation with her. If she interrupts or tries to interject or re-engage and dominate the conversation, i will complain in many different forms about her not letting me get to know her co-worker better. I say things like “Hey, i want to meet and know your co-workers, they seem nice.” “Let me talk to them. You talk to them everyday, come on, give us some space.” “stop hoarding your co-workers”, ” It is not that you wont see them tomorrow? right?”. This will help me dominate the conversation — effectively blocking her out of trying to make me jealous by her having a solid rapport with her co-workers — while absolving me of any jealousy charges. I will keep the conversation as engaging as possible revolving around stories and interests that she is mainly not interested in.
    I certainly wont ask for introductions or “how did you met stories”. If they bring it up, they do; otherwise, i will display easy familiarity with the co-workers and charm them.

    Now, that is how you handle a situation like this.

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  120. I personally wouldn’t “date” any chick that found it neccesary to meet up with a former male coworker for rounds of liquid panty remover.

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  121. I would go up to her, kiss her and give her an informal type “Whats cracking sweetie” with a shit eating grin on my face. Then I would casually eyeball the other two tools and give a nonchalant “What’s happening.”. I would continue talking to her like the other tools didn’t exist until she introduced me.

    Fin

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  122. i’m thinking this isn’t right because you’ve already noted i’m walking towards the group. I wouldn’t do that, but just start working the room, preferably where she doesn’t have a line of sight. When I get a good set going, with preferably 2 girls laughing and having a good time, i’d start plotting a way towards her line of sight but not making any glances in her direction, making sure there’s lots and lots of touching. 1 thing i’ve learned from this blog is jealousy is probably the best route to go.

    This should work especially if the girls in my group are at least as hot as she is. Of course they are, i’m alpha at this point. She’ll probably start trying to get you to notice her. Just ignore. You’re having a good time, who cares about the other one.

    When she finally gets your attention, be nonchalant. “what it is.” Before she can start trying to establish that you’re supposed to be meeting her, give her a big hug like she’s an old friend. Don’t even bother introducing her to the new girls. “I’ll come over and say hi in a bit.” Turn towards the new girls.

    Sounds like this is a massive shit-test. Pass it by re-framing (I’m the one out with 2 girls having a good time) and by not giving a flying fuck.

    At some point, you’ll have to leave, and NOT with your main squeeze. Perhaps move to a different spot with the new girls, or kiss-close in full view and just leave. Cut off contact for at least a week.

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  123. Get her to sit on my lap.

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  124. Much Ado About Nothing.

    You walk up with the same confidence you fuck her with. Greet her affectionately with a kiss on that brightly colored mouth, holding her waist like you just might be raring up to start banging then and there (which is how you should normally be greeting her if you want the act to have meaning – to her and you). Maybe even slip in the hint of tongue for good measure.

    The guys are her social burden to present to you for your approval. Not your problem, nor your competition. You have no competition – at least not in that bar. She makes the introductions. You give firm handshakes and be your witty and charming self.

    If she fucks up the ordeal, that’s her problem. Then it’s time for some new pussy. Until then, be yourself, have some fun, and take her home and bang her at the end of the night.

    Any questions?

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  125. Rule:

    Never let HER frame the evening/date/event (at least not completely).

    Even if she’s got a good idea for a date, or if it’s something you really should attend (e.g. her workplace Christmas party).

    YOU MUST REFRAME the INVITE to your terms.

    E.g.:

    “Let’s do X/Y/Z *first*, then go to your thing.

    “I’ll pick you up, we’ll have dinner at , THEN go to X/Y/Z.

    “I’m busy until , can we go late. I’ll pick you up. (this is real good if it’s something you don’t feel like doing, but know that it will get you points if you make the effort.)

    “I understand you need to make an appearance, but let’s not stay long… . ”

    “You go ahead. I’ll be there if I can (you won’t).” is better than nothing.

    Worst case: “Maybe next time. Maybe next year. Maybe someday, but not this time… anything to take control of the request.”

    You must be in charge of the social calendar, even if/when it seems like you are NOT.

    If she refuses to submit to this subtle form of control, then she’s telling you she will NEVER submit to you. She should let you be “the guy” in the relationship. Hell, she should encourage this if she has even an ounce of defferential femininity.

    If you fail at this she will SENSE your BETANESS.

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  126. =========================================
    I would just walk at the bar and order a beer, without even looking at them. Then the girl would say “hey” and only then I would come say hi to her, only her. Then she would introduce the 2 other men who I would strongly shake hands, looking in the eyes (sometimes you can see a glimpse of their intentions in bonus). My bodylanguage would be casual, relax, not surprised nor nervous.
    =========================================

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  127. on December 8, 2009 at 3:18 pm Biting Beaver

    I agree with the ROOKIE…if you are entered without her first spotting you. But if you entered and she spotted you right away…i will go with this:

    http://roissy.wordpress.com/2009/12/08/a-test-of-your-game-8/#comment-149806

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  128. on December 8, 2009 at 3:20 pm Phenomenal One

    @ Biting Beaver

    some woman will not go for sitting on your lap and having their a** slapped as to not look like a girly-girl, especially infront of other woman.

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  129. I’d put my left hand on her shoulder, but not say anything to her or look at her or acknowledge her in any over way. This subtly coveys the message I want to send without being overbearing. I’d extend my right hand out for a handshake and exchange formalities with the two gentlemen.

    BTW Roissy, I don’t think you posted your judgments of your last test. That was always my favorite part.

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  130. I wouldn’t concern myself with this situation at all. I’d turn around, go home and ignore texts/calls from her that day. The 2 idiots can entertain her that night and i’ll bang her the next day.

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  131. on December 8, 2009 at 3:34 pm Biting Beaver

    @phenomenon,

    you wont beleive how many women are girly-girl…..

    “i wear the pants” , so to speak.

    Everything or nothing at all.

    AGAIN, this is how you handle this situation:

    http://roissy.wordpress.com/2009/12/08/a-test-of-your-game-8/#comment-149806

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  132. walk straight up to her, pick her up whether she notices you or not, take her chair, lean against the bar and put her on your lap.
    introduce yourself to the men enthusiastically and ask her to go order you a tequila on the rocks.
    She obviously sees them as friends if she’s introducing them to you; show them you’re not phased and that you keep her in line.

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  133. on December 8, 2009 at 3:43 pm Stud Dynamite

    @ wolf – that’s some kind of over-inner-gaming. It’s back to rolodex and / or your own palm that night for you, while you leave two tools to game, however lame, your planned lay of the night. While I don’t believe dominance is hereditary, but just because you think of yourself as alpha doesn’t mean you are one. You need to act like one. At least if all else fails, make her choose, caveman if you have to. Hell, would a silverback leave and not return calls? It’s only acceptable MeMyselfI way, if you blow her off and don’t show up at all.

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  134. Geez, at this point in my life I wouldn’t care. I’d just treat the guys like any other guys at a bar, that is, I’d be pleasant and a bit gregarious. I’m sure I could figure out from their behavior exactly what’s going on. As for the woman, I’d just assume she’s shit testing me by acting a bit slutty, and her value would drop considerably in my eyes, which would make it that much easier to act like an alpha in her presence.

    Specifics? Ask if everybody would be so kind as to move to a place where there is more seating.

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  135. Walk up to your girl, say hi. She introduces to the guys. If she doesn’t, call her out on her bad manners. Shoot the shit with everybody for a couple of minutes then move to a table.
    Treat the guys like her female friends. Compliment them even but also pepper in the words nice, good, sensible and sensitive towards them.
    Leave after a few drinks and some food(45 min) with your girl if you are banging her tonight or alone if you have something else lined up.

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  136. Flirting with other women and putting your hands on the other guys in this situation is overkill.

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  137. Why in the hell would anyone want to accept the invite in the first place? You guys really want your women to know you have nothing better to do with your valuable time than sit there and listen to stories about people, places, etc. that you have no clue about?

    When I agree to meet a girl out first and foremost I want to have a good time. This scenario does not sound like a fun time to me. When placed in these situations, I always say I’ll try and make it and never do. I’m too busy climbing mountains, swimming oceans, and killing big game with my bare fucking hands.

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  138. You could just leave the event without saying hi.

    Or start flirting with another girl and make her come over to you.

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  139. Walk up to the group.

    Hug and kiss the girl first. Shake hands and introduce yourself to the guys.

    Buy yourself a drink, preferably a quality beer or a scotch or whiskey on the rocks.

    Shoot the shit and talk for the amount of time that you spend emptying your first drink.

    Upon completion of drink, whisper in your girl’s ear that she looks so sexy right now that you’re going to bring her to the bathroom for a quickie. When she looks back at you with the ‘please do that’ look. Take her hand and walk her out, back to wherever you planned on fucking her that night.

    Seems fairly easy. Grab a drink, shoot the shit, be social, then be a man and close..

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  140. This is silly; if I’ve been porking a young lady for several months, I’ve already proved those dudes are irrelevant with my mighty swordsmanship and the fact that I’m more fun than a room full of naked Japanese girls. Whatever I’d “do” would naturally reflect this. Probably be funny, obnoxious and awesome: the usual.
    I’d also have to wonder WTF I accepted an invitation to hang out with her dork coworker. Why on earth would I do that unless he had something I need? After dating that long, us “meeting up” should be at my place, followed by her ironing my shirts.

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  141. the main thing here is that these guys are not a threat at all assuming you’ve already been banging this chick and she just wanted to meet up for a drink.

    do what you’d normally do when you’re going to meet up with a chick you’ve already been fucking.

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  142. Maybe someone else has said soemthing similar, but – my old way of doing things worked well may times. I could almost be invisible, even standing next to someone – no sound, no sense I was there, nothing – like a black hole. 🙂

    Using something like that, I’d first go to the bar, get my beer (should be a bottle), then move close enough to eavesdrop for a moment or three, “hovering” just outside her perception. It’s OK, even preferrable, for the guys to know you’re there, without indicating it to her – she should be engrossed in the conversation. Also, if you are there for more than a few seconds, you’re just creepy – it has to be fast and smooth, and flow into…

    Move in on her by pressing the cold beer on her back or neck, to disrupt the entire flow of the conversation. The guys should see this coming, and you should be smiling so they know you have a pre-existing connection with her – the statement being, “She’s flaunting her beauty, but she’s coming home with me, boys.”

    After she jumps and shrieks, while you three guys are laughing, you get to toast the guys (so you’re all in on the joke), and you make introductions yourself, and initiate some small talk.

    Depending on her personality, you might get a face full of drink, but if not figure out who is whom in about 5-10 minutes. If you can’t, and she doesn’t help, finish the beer, move on and open someone else. If she’s not reciprocating your initial body language, after all – IE, no affection even after getting over the sudden cold spot – she’s not worth it – she’s using YOU for social proof, and you might as well capitalize on her reaction and the attention others sent your way. Other women will notice the ballsy approach, they’ll see the social proof, they’ll see she didn’t respond by throwing a drink in your face – meaning, you have enough worth that even being a dick is OK to her – and the fact you’re willing to open the group,and then make the rounds looking for more, gaming them all – I think it might be arrogant enough to work out well for you regardless of what the intended target does, or who she leaves with.

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  143. on December 8, 2009 at 4:38 pm the F-manifesto

    id text her and say “im here by the bar but i cant find you”

    in the meantime id order a drink and chat up a girl nearby

    presumably, shed COME to you then.

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  144. OK, two thoughts, since a quick review indicates people falling into a few groups…

    1. Yes, it’s weak to accept the invitation from her, HOWEVER, the co-worker might know a few hotties that are lonely, too… Networking, too – also good for business, he might turn into a client/employer.

    2. These guys (definitely 1) ARE trying to get her (game or other). They ARE a “threat” in that sense. Of course, approaching ti that way is doomed to failure, so assume you’ll game all three, without being a cockblocker. You dominate the conversation enough that you’re top dog, lead it subtly, lead her to conclude exactly what you know – that you’re the prize, and the other two guys are at best sloppy seconds…

    3. If she’s inviting you this way and she’s not perfect, she’s probably hooked up with the coworker. As long as you aren’t in a “comitted”* relationship, who cares? But treat her as if she’s gone already, and find new meat. If she IS perfect, then a little effort will tell you if she’s been riding the other man, and you can take her, use her, dump her back on the street early enough for the second shift to show up… 😀

    *: “Fidelity is only for your Mate!” – Mordred, “Camelot”. Truer words were never spoken, she should be committed to you, and you should be playing the field. If she’s not comitted, your game needs work. If she is, then it’s time to talk threesome. With her daughter. 🙂

    {Was that over the top? I can never tell….}

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  145. Boldly walk up to them. Say “hey babe” to her.

    If she rushes very quickly to make introductions, let her.

    If not, intorduce yourself to the guys – in full ‘displaying confidence’ mode.

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  146. @ biting beaver:

    ” will walk over straight to her with a rich smirk and controlled swagger. With my eyes totally focused on her…midway through my stride towards her….i will appear distracted ….indicated by me partially stopping in my tracks to glance/stare/check out another woman on my left or right, as the case may be. Then, i will resume my stride towards her, completely locking eyes with her, with same swagger/rich smirk. Completely ignoring the two men or women to her sides.(because, rest assured, she is checking out your eyes to see your reaction to her sitting next to those two wo(men).”

    This is probably one of the most idiotic verses I have had the pleasure of reading. Thank you for living in a fantasy. If this is some fat, disgusting excuse of a woman maybe you can pull it off. But if this is an attractive woman it will be misread instantly as overcompensating and jealousy for her having you meet her with two men. It would be better to just stay at home and not talk to her that night or to just stroll up to them casually stay for a few minutes and politely dismiss yourself to more important happenings.

    The papa hand gesture is completely unnecessary. Sylvio does that to a woman he is not with… Obama’s wife. He does that to prove a point of dominance, where it wasn’t already established. Your dominance as the lover/boyfriend of past few months is clearly established. If it is not you dismiss yourself and never speak to her again. You are already with the woman it is her duty to come to you. You shouldn’t have to summon her when she is yours.

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  147. on December 8, 2009 at 4:52 pm Michael wears a hat

    Walk towards them. Say “Hey babe, I’m gonna grab a drink, back in a few.” Nod towards the guys as I walk off. At the bar, take my time, get into a conversation or two, before I eventually go back or she makes her way over to me.

    Point is to show abject disinterest in the fact that she’s getting gamed by two guys. My wandering off suggests some combination of my lack of interest in her, which will get her panties wet, or lack of threat from the two guys, which will lessen them in her eyes. Regardless if she’s using these guys as a shit test, fuck her. Not playing that game.

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  148. OK, I haven’t read any of the other comments, so here goes:

    I would walk straight up to them, first make strong but brief eye contact with, and nod to, each man, without smiling, but say nothing to them. Then I would turn to my girl, take her hand and give her a slight (relaxed but confident smile – she is YOUR girl after all), and say to her, “Introduce me to your friends”.

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  149. I smell some internet-strongmanhood here.

    This is not a situation where a man should waver and think over his tactics.

    Myself would be most likely to check by the bar first and get a beer (this is at the #1 beer bar, remember?) to make myself comfortable and then slowly stroll over to the group.

    If the relationship with that girl is past the power struggle phase (which typically lasts throughout the first couple of months), I might show her my elated mood at seeing her and grab her ass in a surprise attack or something. But if she’s a just a bitch who only remained in rotation for her great tits, I would probably enjoy watching her work out the social awkwardness in passive mode.

    If she is a good girl I’d reward her by

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  150. We’ve already been dating for months, right? Then we’re way past the “Prove I’m Alpha” stage. Chances are that the whole purpose of this little meeting is that she wants to show me off. So that FCW (Former Co-Worker) can report back to to the office what a heck of a great guy GF (Girl Friend) has found. Nothing gets a girl wet like imagining all her friends wishing they had such a great boyfriend.

    With that in mind, I’m going to give her what she wants by simply being my usual charming Riff Dog self. Which means no nonsense like waiting off to the side or at the bar or another table for her to come to me. That ain’t alpha, it’s just plain weird. You don’t want GF worrying that FCW is going to report back to their friends that her new beau is a socially awkward weirdo.

    I’d approach directly. Smiling, because that’s my nature. To do otherwise would be fake and would make GF think I’m uncomfortable. Assuming GF sees me, then of course we’re going to address each other first. It would be awkward and out of character to do otherwise. After all, there’s no pretending that she’s not why I came here.

    I can’t imagine her not getting off her stool to hug me or at least hold my hand as she introduces her friends, so that part’s easy. I do hug her, even kiss her (lightly) if she’s reaching for one (no need to embarrass her by leaving her hanging.) But I definitely go easy on the PDA. I want the appearance of “Yes, we’ve fucked. But the rest is still to be determined.”

    If she does not see me as I approach, then I say to the group, “Excuse me, do you guys know where I could get some good stock tips?” or some other silly opening joke appropriate to whatever profession they work in. It doesn’t have to be the most clever joke ever written. Just something that tells them that I’m here and not afraid to make my presence known.

    At this point, GF’s eyes will light up as she recognizes my voice, realizing I’ve arrived and she gets to introduce me (show me off) to these guys. I assume GF will make the introductions, but if, for some reason, she’s slow at doing it, I’ll do it myself with an outstretched hand and “Hey, I’m Riff Dog.” I’d start with whichever guy is making the most eye contact with me.

    The seating arrangement is problematic. If neither of the guys offers me his seat, I say “I’m gonna snag a table.” Better would be if one of the guys does offer me his seat. Because then I say, “Thanks, but that’s all right, I’m gonna snag a table.” Because Riff Dog is a nice guy . . . but subtly more important than that, Riff Dog takes charge.

    Speaking of “nice guy” and “takes charge,” I pay for the next round of drinks. This brings me into the fold and will help in making these guys allies. By the way, it’s highly unlikely these guys are competitors. They may think they’re competitors, but she doesn’t. (It’s the guys she doesn’t introduce you to that you have to worry about.) So treat these guys as potential allies who will help you look good, as opposed to competitors that must be defeated.

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  151. One other thought: Some of my answer is under the assumption that GF is going to be excited to see me and either get up to hug me or somehow make a showing of being glad to see me. If she instead plays aloof and doesn’t properly acknowledge me, then I know we have a major problem. Not just this evening, but in our “future.”

    So if that happens, I’d still smile and be friendly and say, “Hey, it’s really nice meeting you guys.” Then semi-privately to GF, “Rick got Laker tickets, so I can’t stay. But I wanted to stop by instead of just calling. You understand, right?” Then leave.

    After that, I’d continue to bone her as usual as I look for a more suitable and respectful replacement.

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  152. @Stud Dynamite

    “@ wolf – that’s some kind of over-inner-gaming. It’s back to rolodex and / or your own palm that night for you, while you leave two tools to game, however lame, your planned lay of the night. While I don’t believe dominance is hereditary, but just because you think of yourself as alpha doesn’t mean you are one. You need to act like one. At least if all else fails, make her choose, caveman if you have to. Hell, would a silverback leave and not return calls? It’s only acceptable MeMyselfI way, if you blow her off and don’t show up at all.”

    jealousy and competition are not in my vocabulary when it comes to women. The worst mistake you can make is have her choose, you’ll come off needy and desperate. You don’t need to get bent out shape just because she’s flirting with “two tools”. I don’t need to prove anything to anybody, including the fact that i’m banging her. So if she didn’t see me when I entered the venue I’ll turn around and go home. There is no need to for 3 guys to entertain a woman when 2 already are doing a good job of it. I already banged her so I’m pretty sure in the next couple of days i’ll bang her again. One night of no sex is not going to kill me.

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  153. on December 8, 2009 at 5:48 pm It's My First Day

    Walk up confidently and without hesitation. Acknowledge your girl (“hey !”) then make strong eye contact with and smile and nod at the guys. As you have been going out with this girl for a few months, we can assume that she will have the social acumen to then introduce you to the guys. Shake hands like your bad alpha self. Before they have any chance to resume the conversation, go alpha on whatever guy you have figured to be the more dominant of the two. Ask him how he knows your girl, and smile and nod like you give a shit. The point here is to demonstrate that he doesn’t intimidate you and that you aren’t threatened by him. Do this bullshit for a minute or two and then just throw it into cruise control and continue to be your awesome self and do what you would normally do.

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  154. Walk up behind her, squeeze her butt and say ‘hi, how’s it going’ to both guys. Eye contact with the taller guy.

    If you get a drink first make it a soda; you could be going to another bar soon.

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  155. A new candidate if you ever want to start that ‘worthless whore of the month’ contest:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1234039/Prison-warder-admits-fling-rapist-jailed-acid-attack-TV-presenter.html

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  156. While I’s here and off topic and all, I suggest that Tiger Woods be Beta of the Millenium given how his feeble handling of his many (mostly very unhot) extra-marital poon expiditions have catastrophically blown up in his face and dropped his monetary value – sponsors are fleeing at light speed and even if his wife can be paid to stay with him she’s gonna own his multi-racial sack forever and ever.

    At this stage he’s violated any number of unwritten rules of adultery by powerful men ‘don’t publicly humiliate your wife unless you’re planning on leaving her’ and ‘choose women whose discretion can be assured’ and quite frankly I don’t care if his wife takes him to the cleaners.

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  157. Walk up to my girl. Huge grin on my face. Grab the back of her head and kiss her on the forehead or cheek. Talk with her for a few seconds while completely ignoring the guys. Then introduce myself to them, ask their name and put my hand on their upper arms as I shake their hands. I am being both warm and dominant.

    To further establish dominance and leadership, I would move the group to a table so we can all sit, and position it in such a way that I am sitting next to my girl. Depending on the situation I might put my arm around her; it must not be a vibe of jealous possessiveness but rather of assertive confidence. I want to send the room a message that says, ‘I’m a friendly confident guy. This pussy is mine; I like it but I don’t need it, however if you mess with it I will mindfuck you.’

    I would be polite to the guys as long as they weren’t trying to game my girl. If they start breaking rapport or sexually escalating with her, I would enter into a logical discussion with them to kill their fun vibe, build up a miniature friendship, then completely ignore them or use a ‘male-neg’ in order to get them to qualify themselves to me. Most men wouldn’t have the gall to attempt game her though if they know we are boyfriend and girlfriend.

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  158. seriously..not Brickskeller? The jukebox alone makes it the best beer bar in DC.

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  159. People go through different stages in their life.

    If she is just looking to fuck around, by all means keep her around. But eventually she will stray to someone else. When she does, let her go. You didn’t really want her for an LTR anyway.

    Although you guys say she has to “choose”, I would say that you are implicitly being quiet about the fact that you’ll try to keep her around. That’s a bit rotten, because you’re supposed to improve her life, not hog women to yourself for no other reason than ego.

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  160. ‘don’t publicly humiliate your wife unless you’re planning on leaving her’

    This stuff all got public because the wife hit Tiger about the head with a golf club. Tiger tried to cover that up but it didn’t work. After that, it became a news story so women came out to reporters about it.

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  161. So , after some 150 responses , time for Roissy’s answer.

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  162. @PA “the type who thinks he’s alpha, but girls find him amusing in small doses and annoying in big dosed.”

    And now you’re a regular commenter on his blog.

    Like


  163. @sfer, chicken or egg, apparently his clumsy, low rent adulteries have been an open secret in the press for a while (he did some interview to keep them going public some time ago) and the latest was about to blow up and she knew it. Certainly her …. outburst speeded things up but it was about to become public in an ugly way regardless. At any rate, he chose poorly in the first place by banging women likely to go straight to the press (instead of quietly and patiently waiting for discreet …. rewards for not doing so).

    Like


  164. walk up to her and drop the apocalypse opener with a wizard hat on. (i’m kidding)

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  165. Roissy,

    I just read your post, and the scenario that you (or someone you know) was presented with.

    I’d like to add this one salient point for the ladies who read this blog:

    _Imagine_ the scenario *reversed*, and a guy that you (ladies) have been dating for 3-4 months asks you to meet him at a bar, and that he wants you to meet a female co-worker of his. You show up and he is sitting between two pretty attractive women without wedding bands or engagement rings, and they are having a merry old time. Just by the looks of it, if you didn’t know these people, you’d think the two gals were best pals and are contemplating going home with this guy for a threesome.

    Ladies, how would you feel about that? Would you be a tad piqued?

    Men are confronted with stuff like this all of the time.

    ————————————————————————-

    To Roissy’s scenario:

    Walk up and say, “Hi Julie” (or whateverthefuckhernameis), and then say “Hi Gentleman, Im the one she’s been talking so much about for the past three months, keep in mind only a third of its true, a third of its exaggerated, and a third of it is her mixing me up with somebody else”. Start telling your best dirty jokes and make friends with the guys if possible just like you do with your own buddies, and be as magnetic and entertaining as you always are with everyone else. If she is leaning toward leaving you for one of these two…………..you have read about game and can go out and find another ho, um Im mean girlfriend, to entertain yourself with.

    BTW—–I still think the Tiger Woods situation is hysterical. The number is up to 9. When does he sleep? (!) The worlds best golfer can maintain that level of play with a sore dick apparently.

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  166. @ z

    wasnt a broken leg after all … broken dick…

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  167. I haven’t read one response yet; my plan – put myself in the girl’s place and think about what I’d like my man to do and what would give me the tingle.

    Scenario:
    I don’t see him coming my head is thrown back in a laugh, I’m enjoying the company of two men.

    He approaches.

    He reaches out and pinches my cheek – he does it gently but with enough pressure that I know he’s saying ‘hey – I’m here now’. He is grinning when he does it and it seems totally teasing and playful to the men flanking me. It signals his relationship to me to the guys and mine to him.

    Important – He doesn’t greet me. He pinches me and then offers his hand to the man who looks the most dominant of the two. When he shakes his hand he also shoulder pat/slaps him – to me a friendly yet dominant move. He then shakes the other man’s hand.

    The pinch is a playful move but also one that clearly defines the relationship. A man has to have assurance his woman wouldn’t hit him back if he pulls this manouever – alpha’s only need apply. 😉

    A good woman will get off her stool and offer her man hers. A good man will say thanks but I can grab one.

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  168. i think you’re overcomplicating it, between seeing your girl & approaching them, you’ve got like 30 seconds max. what are you going to cower in the corner coming up with the perfect angle? or just back your social competence.

    smile at her as you approach – a genuine smile, NOT a fake insecure one or dopey grin. at this point she should get up to greet you, even move away from her seat temporarily – give her a kiss & politely await an introduction which should be done with a good positive energy.

    if she doesnt get up off her ass & look excited to see you, somethings a little fucked up. and if she doesnt introduce you to everyone right away, your girl’s either socially retarded or embarrassed by you. do what you’d normally do in an intro, just be cool & deal with it later. no need to make a spectacle lest you wish to look like a fuckin’ idiot in front of new audience (i love seeing someone else do that).

    but it IS an unconscious shit test from your girl… whether its just one other guy or 10… and you should probably already know this before you arrive. you should be unfazed. ask yourself what would george clooney do? clooney wouldnt act like a jealous school girl or turn on his heel & walk out… so neither should you.

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  169. i agree with tosh

    I dont get this one. I have encountered this with lots of girls. I tend to take them off the high quality list but I always act completely indifferent, treating the guys as if they are her friends.

    It helps to come in and dominate immediately with a story that helps side-track the whole conversation but always act unfazed, treat the guys like I would treat anyone one of male friends introducing me too.

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  170. For half these responses, I can’t tell if the author is serious or satirizing the hyper-analytical mindset of the stereotypical PUA. I like PA’s approach – Casually walk up, she will either notice you or notice the men she is with noticing you, and her reaction should be bubbly, warm introductions, complete with explanations of how she knows each man. If that is not the reaction you get, your problems are bigger than can be addressed here.

    Anyways, on to the over-analyzing.

    Observation #1: This is not a friendly get together.

    “Old co-workers” do not reconnect over drinks at night. They get lunch, or coffee. Either this is an old co-worker who is interested in her, or he is an old co-worker whom she used to bang. Judging by her choice of lipstick, I’d go with the latter.

    Observation #2: The third man is an interloper.

    Old Coworker, whichever of the men he is, would not bring his buddy on a date. If for some reason he did, they would sit at a table. If they did not sit at a table, the stool seating would probably wind up MMF instead of MFM.

    Observation #3: The force is strong with the third man.

    He has: 1) Approached a girl clearly on a date, 2) Not gotten shot down immediately, and 3) Had a good time with the other two. Almost definitely a well-read and effective PUA.

    Observation #4: The old coworker/fling, because he is laughing instead of sulking – the force is strong with him, too.

    Final analysis: Take a seat, contestant #3. Your lady friend, while impressed with what you’ve brought to the table over the past few months, was planning (subconsciously) to test your alpha chops in a head-to-head with a former man-friend who apparently also pushed enough of her buttons to earn a call-back interview. As luck would have it, she’s been blessed with a third competitor against whom she may test your mettle.

    As for practical advice, they key is to maintain the attitude of “dispassionate curiosity” until the situation is fully fleshed out. You are interested in the proceedings, not as a boyfriend with skin in the game, but as a student of human nature. Walk up to your girl, give her whatever greeting would be customary absent the two other Truth or Date contestants, and then get on with being more awesome than either of them.

    If the situation is as described above, here are some guidelines for the rest of the night:

    – Mentally downshift the girl to the bottom of your “class” ranking, good for some pump-and-dump distraction, but not picket-fence material.

    – Start texting friends and other girls, and try to make other plans. Ideally at the same bar.

    – Bond with the guys, if they are bro-worthy, on the tacit mutual acknowledgment of “who the hell is this girl?” Girls come and go, but a good wingman is hard to find.

    – If you stop enjoying yourself, say to your girl in the presence of the other men, “So you ready to get out of here?” If she says no, leave. After that, you downgrade her to 2-3 2-hour visits per month.

    If the situation is innocent, just be a cool dude and enjoy meeting some new people. If she is tooling you, she is not worth any investment, but if you want to keep her in the stable, just suck it up and be the cooler guy.

    Cheers,

    Zdeno

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  171. Seriously? Why would she want you to meet her coworkers? Maybe it’s her gay friend.

    I would get a bottle of beer probably bud cuz it’s shitty and walk up casually to them then break it on one of the guys head then use the broken end to stab the other. While they’re both on the ground, I will grab/pick up the chick and carry her out for cave man style sex at her place, so afterwards I can leave her without having to deal with a broad in the morning. That’ll teach her I don’t meet “her” coworkers unless they have double Ds, 35-24-25 measurements and platinum blond hair.

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  172. This is fucking lame. If you’ve been truly dating someone for more than a month, they shouldnt be asking you to meet them out with another guy. End of story. You’re a pussy for even going.

    PS..is it Church Key or RFD?

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  173. Leave the bar. Cry yourself to sleep that night. Text her love poems drunkenly at 3 am.

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  174. I’m with Rollo on the standing thing. Not only does it imply power but she will have to turn around to face you to include you in the convo and that will put you at ground zero.

    To add a couple of things:

    1. Putting herself into this situation would demote her a notch or two

    2. She might not be consciously shit testing you, but you can be damn sure she IS judging your every move in a situation like this. Here she is, in the company of three men, all of whom you can assume have/would like to fuck her. Dance monkeys, dance!

    3. You should be cool, confident, and forget about playing games. If you are socially skilled everything should flow naturally. If you aren’t, you should probably extract yourself from the situation because you have nothing to gain and everything to lose.

    4. Assuming you ARE skilled socially, use this as an opportunity to do a little testing of your own. I would be very curious why a chick would be putting me into this kind of a situation in the first place. I would assume that there is at least a 50% chance that she’s already boned the coworker until I have had a chance to assess the situation. If you determine that these guys are completely harmless (I have encountered this before) it’s no big deal. If you determine she has a history with one of them, she would get a SERIOUS demotion.

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  175. Stu has it right:

    Who cares what they are talking about, you’re there now. Who cares if there’s an elaborate shit test being created by the girl?

    You pass shit tests by not caring.

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  176. Walk up to your girl, look around the joint as if you’re confused, and say, “Hey, didn’t Co-worker show up?”

    She says, “No, this guy is Co-worker.”

    You say, “Oh, hey, man. I thought I’d be able to recognize you.” If a table’s available, move the girl there while everyone is still nonplussed. Otherwise, say to her, “I gotta pee. Order me a [manly drink].”

    When you come back, take the drink and talk to the group while standing. Standing doesn’t bother you, because it means you can handle anything that happens. Make sure your back isn’t facing the open area of the room. Then make friends with the men, because the odds of them being less interesting companions than a woman are low.

    The beauty of the opener is that it negs both your girl and the co-worker. It implies that she’s said something distinctive about the man, and that she’s the kind of girl who would talk up two strangers in bars.

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  177. Also, I should note that a lot of women today will not hesitate to bring an ex fuck buddy out to meet you for drinks.

    Funny how chicks rationalize that it is perfectly acceptable to bring a guy like this around since they were never “boyfriend and girlfriend”.

    I was the ex fuck buddy that had the pleasure of meeting the new b/f a few months ago when I visited NYC. I knew she had a b/f, but didn’t think he was going to be there when I met up with her. Dude kept his game face on, but it seemed like he had the situation pegged and wasn’t entirely happy about it.

    Now that I think about it, if this is an EX-coworker, there is a much better than 50% chance she’s boned him.

    You’re being punked.

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  178. Since the former co-worker was not a hot, horny female that your GF wanted you to size up for a threesome, I’d say any other scenario would be a disappointment or more obviously a shit test. Who invites their lover to join an in-progress happy hour with a mystery man? Shouldn’t the “former co-worker” have been invited along to join your fun?

    And what’s with the other guy? She didn’t text you any info? What a set-up.

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  179. Use the absence of sufficient seating as a pretext to move everybody to a cannier corner of the bar immediately.
    Ignore the girl with friendly determination. You’re in Saudi Arabia. Show her that women, living as they do in their own world, do not have anything useful to contribute to Men’s conversation. It’s really a special privilege for her to be there at all. Respond with one word game to her utterings.
    Have a good time with the guys. Beer quality is always a great initial conversation topic. If you want, you may even teach them Game in front of her, using the girl as a guinea pig (it’s hilarious if done well).

    Like


  180. It is possible that GF wants to show you off to co-workers. The truth of this should become obvious within the first 10 seconds. If the affirmative is not immediately apparent, withdraw all emotional investment, if any, and put her on the rotation list.

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  181. This happened to me at a David Bowie concert (yes, it was a long time ago). Me, at the concert with a couple of female friends, her deciding to show up with a couple of male friends who had tickets.

    I saw her there, walked up, gave her a long deep throated kiss and walked away. Did not make contact with her at the concert after that and did not acknowledge her companions, and she was so solidly hooked to the point where I had to break up with her soon after.

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  182. What do you guys think of this guy?

    http://www.warriorsage.com/spe/

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  183. My reaction to this would be wholly dependent on my mood. If I am feeling good, have shaken off whatever crap has befallen me that day, and in socialable mood I will behave one way.

    Open with a kiss on the cheek, I don’t like beer breath on a woman, and maybe run my hand through her hair. I will wait to be introduced, and then order a beer. From there we shall see.

    If I am preoccupied, pissed off, and not in the mood to play games I will behave more standoffishly, be abrupt, invest little into the conversation. I may not even order a beer.

    If my woman doesnt like my behavior, and breaks up with me, I don’t mind at all, because she is likely a bitch anyway.

    Like


  184. Warrer sage
    Tantra is a scam. Fool.
    Ram it deep & dump your load if you are serious about achieving enlightment..

    Like


  185. I didn’t hear him mention tantra in any of the videos. Am I missing something?

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  186. “Sorry I’m late, folks. Had to wait until the light was just right to take the perfect picture of THIS”

    http://shorterandsweeter.blogspot.com/2009/12/greatest-christmas-decoration-ever.html

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  187. @3point5,

    I was wrong about Woods. 11 women now have “cum forward”. 2 of them are porn stars,

    http://www.foxnews.com/slideshow/entertainment/2009/11/30/rachel-uchitel-jaimee-grubbs-kalika-moquin?test=faces

    Some are pretty good looking. Im sure a few of them might be lying and looking for attention in hopes to cash in, but it says so much either way. Even if they are lying, what does that say about the current state of slut-shaming mechanisms culturally. These women are apparently -proud-to have slept with a married man and broadcast that fact to the world, with no fear of social outcast or reprecussions. Symptomatic of a sick culture that needs a medicine to induce an immunological response. Faster please—–in neocon tongue.

    Like


  188. Oh dear mother of holyness. What the fuck is this shit. Thursday, and many of the rest of you, thank you. Some of these other comments…

    You have been fucking this girl for months? Folks, “gaming” doesn’t have to mean fucking “playing games”. What is with some of you and the fucking pussyfooting around? Waiting to approach is lame. You specifically agreed to meet this girl at this bar. She knows that you came out to meet her (and her coworker.) Not approaching her immediately is the action of a desperately hesitant fucking pantywaist asshat. No, you do not look “alpha”, when you order a drink first or sneak around or scope out other chicks or whatever the fuck you think you are doing. You look like a fucking asshole dweeb pussyhole asslicker.

    Walk over to her IMMEDIATELY. After entering a room and pausing briefly to assess the scene, men walk calmly, directly, and immediately toward the object of their intention. Floating like a butterfly is for the boxing ring, not the bar.

    TAKE her drink from her with one hand and GRAB her empty hand with your other hand. PULL her off the barstool and kiss her like you are about to bend her over the bar and bone her right there. Female primates respond to male physicality.

    DO NOT touch the two guys. Physicality between male primates, unless they are very close friends, is threat/dominance behavior. The exception is some troops of bonobos, where males suck each others dicks to establish friendship. You’re not a cocksucking bonobo, are you? If you touch the other guys this is not a signal of dominance, this is a signal that you feel they are a threat and need to set the frame. Here is the frame, genius: you’ve been pounding this poontang for months. If you feel threatened by two random guys, try fucking her with your erection next time instead of letting her bone you with her strapon. What the fuck is your problem? Grow a testicle or two.

    Now there is an empty bar stool. Smack your girl on the butt and tell her to go get you a drink while you talk to her friends. Some of you will howl, “But what if she says no?” Buddy, if you’ve been fucking a girl for several months and she’s not happy to go get you ONE beer when you came all the way out to a bar to meet her, then number one you’re a dipshit, and number two, it is way past time to dump that bitch and move on.

    Off she goes, look at her cute ass, which you will be balls deep in later tonight. You will hold onto her drink for her until she returns with your beer. If you like what she is drinking, by all means drink it. She can share whatever you’re having if she’s still thirsty.

    Now introduce yourself, like a man, to the two other men. By the way, having a girl introduce you to another man is some modernist PC feminist bullshit. Be a fucking man and speak up for your fucking self. Introduce yourself to the two guys like you would any other two men you meet in a bar. The girl is not in the picture. What they think of the girl, what they’ve been talking about with the girl, how they know the girl – nothing about the girl is material to whatever relationship you build (or not) with these two men. This is why she does not even need to be present for this conversation.

    When the girl returns she can sit on your lap or, if the barstool is too high, lean up against you. If one of the other guys offers her his seat, politely decline for her. She doesn’t need his seat, because she has you. If you find that you don’t have any interest in conversing further with the two other men, then when the girl returns with your beer politely tell them that it was nice to meet them, that you and her are going to catch up now, and maybe you’ll have a chance to chat with them later. Offer to switch seats with one of them so they can sit next to each other. Since two grown men playing musical chairs so they can sit next to each other is gay, they will likely decline and leave, unless they are gay, in which case no problem.

    Oh, and stop worrying about “dominating the conversation”. What the fuck is that bullshit, “dominating the conversation.” Save the fucking dominance games for the bedroom. If you have something to say, say it. If someone else is saying something interesting, listen. If you’re not interested in the topic of conversation, change the fucking subject. That’s it. You’re at a bar. Have a fucking drink, relax, and fucking enjoy. Titillate your girl with details of possible threesome scenes with her and other girls at the bar. Alternate between threesomes with hot girls and with fat ugly chicks.

    Never admit to her that you are joking about the fat girls.

    Like


  189. Grab her from behind with one hand while unzipping with the other.

    Whirl her around and push her face first into your cock. With free hand, chug one to the guys’ drinks.

    Then ask for a an empty shot glass.

    Just before you orgasm, yell out , “Cock punch!” and nail both dudes in the nads.

    As they double over, tell your girl not to swallow, but spit into the shot glass.

    When you’ve unloaded and she’s regurgitated into said glass, drop it into the other guy’s full beer glass.

    Tell him to do a Roissy Car Bomb.

    Then punch your woman in the gut and toss her over your shoulder.

    Ultimate win.

    Like


  190. Interrupting her conversation with the men would stink of jealousy. Go find some other girls in the bar. Jealousy will drive that bitch crazy and she’ll come to you.

    Like


  191. more on tiger woods

    Like


  192. Eumaios:

    “You say, “Oh, hey, man. I thought I’d be able to recognize you.””

    too transparent.

    a lot of the suggestions are going into this as if the guy is automatically an enemy.

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  193. Stride over, and if the two men are sitting close enough, put a hand on each of their shoulders. Say, “Hello, gentlemen.” Since they are sitting, they will now be physically undernearth your grasp, and your front will be fully exposed to your lady, in the middle.

    Then say hello to the girl. Let her introduce you the men — don’t introduce yourself. She’ll have already mentioned you to them, so they’ll know that you’re the guy she’s already mentioned. They know you. But don’t recognize “the guy from work” as “the guy from work”. You don’t know them.

    Once you meet them, see what types of beer they are drinking and praise their selections. But then suggest a better and slightly more obscure beer from the menu of one they’ve got to try. Buy a round of that beer — it’s on you.

    Then starting talking to the guys. Ask them questions. Direct the attention away from the girl. Ignore her. Make it feel like you could go out with these guys and have a better time if she weren’t there.

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  194. I agree entirely with str8up on this scenario.

    Re: Tiger. He is uber-alpha by definition. He is fucking lots of super hot chicks. How he seems in the media is irrelevant.

    Like


  195. Wow, I smell massive fail. Thank to Lurker for summarizing the insanity. Where’s Roosh’s ultimately correct comment?

    Like


  196. I’ll preface my remarks by noting that I’m in the middle of a divorce and have never had any game. The answer to this one, though, seems fairly obvious to me.

    Now, first off, you’ve been screwing this girl for several months. She either likes it or she doesn’t. Given the fact that she’s stuck around this long you can safely assume the latter.

    You owe her nothing.

    This type of behavior is unacceptable in every way, shape, and form. You could have called her out on this earlier, but you were not quite certain of the nature of this “date”. Upon arriving, however, you immediately identify the situation for what it truly is: the penultimate** shit test. As it turns out, though, this is the perfect venue for what comes next.

    You approach with the barest of smiles and tell her to order your drink as you go to the bathroom. Do not engage either man. Whilst in the bathroom, you will compose yourself and mentally prepare for the ensuing “small talk”. Sorry, but if you’re like 99% of all men, you’ll need a moment.

    The “men” who agreed to this date are a couple of douchebags. Anyone who is okay with chatting up another man’s girl is scum. Bros before ‘ho’s. The have violated the most sacred of man-laws. End of story.

    You owe them nothing.

    Despite what others have said, disappearing (quickly and briefly) to the bathroom is an excellent idea. There is in every human heart the fear of the unknown. Kind of like the monster under the bed. Each of the three people at the bar KNOWS that what they are doing is shitty but none of them is quite sure how you are going to react. If your approach is dispassionate, they still WON’T KNOW how you’re going to react. This will cause each of them a certain amount of gastrointestinal distress. After all, if this is a test, you still haven’t answered the question that she desperately wants answered: whether you pass or fail the test. You have withheld that which she desired and now you are in charge.

    You will remain dispassionately congenial when you return to the bar. Laugh a little, smile a little, but show as little emotion as possible. Keep them guessing as to how you really feel. You will not sit, but neither will you “find a table”. Your excuse: I’ve been sitting all day; let me just finish my drink before we sit down. When you have finished your drink you will proceed to make your exit:

    “Well, I really must be going. I want to thank you gentlemen for helping me to see [bitch’s name here]’s true character. After all, not everyone gets to see their girlfriend cavorting with two other males RIGHT IN FRONT OF THEM. Though, I must say, I’ve never been treated so disrespectfully before. Sweetie, you can drop by tomorrow night. Your things will be packed in a box on the porch”.

    Note: you don’t not call names. You don’t curse. You are sincerely thanking two strangers for helping you out. No matter the outcome here, these guys did you a favor. Therefore, be matter-of-fact and don’t raise your voice.

    You want to be like Bruce Willis in “The Last Boy Scout”. He catches his wife cheating on him with his best friend. He seems almost amused by the discovery and walks away without saying anything. His wife pursues him, wanting him to call her a “bitch” or a “slut” so that she can see that he cared. They re-unite in the end with him calling her all of these things -again, though, very dispassionately. She, of course, is ready to ride the hell out of him.

    To respond in an angry fashion is to reward them for their behavior. Never do this.

    If she follows after you ignore her and keep your back toward her. The only acknowledgement necessary would be raising you hand -with arm squared at a right angle. The back of your hand is facing her. Kind of like the “talk to the hand” gesture, only done with authority. In effect, you ARE backhanding her without the pleasure (for her) of violence. She has greatly disrespected you and lowered her value below your standards. She is not worthy of your emotion.

    If she is of any quality, she will profusely apologize and -10 days later, when you finally answer her calls- make it up to you in a very pleasing fashion. Properly chastened, she will not try this stunt again.

    If she doesn’t come back then she’s trash and you’ve done yourself a favor. Furthermore, she’ll be more reluctant to try this sort of thing in the future; meaning that you’ve also done the next guy a favor.

    Errata:

    -Too many folks on here are talking about “gaming” the situation. This is wrong. You already gamed her months ago…and guess what? YOU WON.

    -If she wanted to “show you off” to her friends she would invite them over to your home for dinner. Instead, she decided to go to a place where singles meet each other for casual sex.

    -The former co-worker is either a) a beta who’s been secretly pining for years or b) a player who’s trying to work his way back. Either way, he’s a pawn in her retarded game. Whatever chance he ever had at fucking her (again?) will have immediately dropped to zero after your departure.

    -The third man is totally out of the picture at this point (at least for the evening). It is doubtful that he has any history with this woman and even if he does the co-worker is most likely to play the role of white knight/comforter.

    **The ultimate one, of course, being the “marry-me-or-else” shit test.

    Like


  197. One more thing:

    It does not matter whether she was, in fact, “cavorting”, “flirting”, or whatever at that precise moment. Do not explain yourself on how you came to that conclusion. She needs to convince you otherwise…which she’ll be entirely unable to do. Your girlfriend should NOT be conversing with two unattached men at a bar. It’s that simple.

    Like


  198. Btw I can’t believe you guys missed this very comprehensive study on the economics of sex akin to the one done by Roger F. Devlin . I highly recommend reading it and analyzing it as it resonates with what is being discussed on this blog

    http://www.csom.umn.edu/Assets/71503.pdf

    on the other hand, some interesting statistics on divorce

    http://www.divorcerate.org/

    Like


  199. Other than agreeing with str8up, my approach would be thus:

    My curiosity is in how she reacts when I show up. If she defers to me, and doesn’t treat the others as equal then no problem. I have seen (rare) occasions in which a girl can maintain a weak friendship with a weak male with no issues. Sometimes people really are just office buddies, but this is usually only if the guy is on the omega side. I would expect that she has told the guys who I am and that my showing up should be a big event which stops all of their previous conversation so that i can be introduced, etc. Perhaps one of the guys is the ex-office (omega) friend and the other is a player hanging at the bar. If so, she should be making fun of the player at the time I show up. Perhaps this is why they have been laughing. On the other hand, if she is clearly flirting with either of the guys, she gets seriously demoted. Maybe I would have one beer and then leave. No good excuse needed. She is now low on my list. Next!

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  200. Wait, who let her out of the kitchen?

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  201. Walk straight up to her and announce your presence with something socially acceptable, but attention grabbing. Perhaps something along the lines of “Hey babe!”. Give her the command to “come here”. This gets her up on her feet. You both walk a step or 2 to meet each other and then say to her “give me some sugar”. She should plant a big wet one on you right there. You sit down and have her sit on your lap, one arm around her with your hand resting on her hip. Ask her “these your work buddies?” indicating they you are assuming they both are from her old job, which you know is not supposed to be the situation, and thus placing the onus on her to correct your assumption and explain what the real situation is and who the actual old coworker is. Based on the logistics, I’d wager the non-work buddy is just a dude that happened to be at the bar and was trying to worm his way into the set.

    If things don’t go like this then you fucked up training her and building compliance somewhere before.

    Like


  202. and this article by the same author

    http://www.denisdutton.com/baumeister.htm

    “To summarize my main points: A few lucky men are at the top of society and enjoy the culture’s best rewards. Others, less fortunate, have their lives chewed up by it. “

    Like


  203. Wow, there is a lot of insecurity coming from a lot of you.

    2 Situations:

    Situation 1: She’s facing into the bar, I walk up behind her and press myself close to her and smell her, right under her ear next to her neck. She’ll hear me. If she’s startled she’ll quickly turn towards me. I’ll eyeflash her(its where you quickly widen your eyes for a splitsecond) wearing a small smirk on my face and my head slightly cocked. I’ll say the word “up.” She’ll stand up (I train my women), I’ll take her hand and quickly turn her, then I’ll proceed to sit in her seat with my back facing the bar. She can stand or lean/sit against my leg. I’ll then wrinkle my nose at her choice in beer. After that I’ll look at the guy to my right in his eyes with my eyebrows up and an amused-at-myself smirk. I’ll say nothing. If he goes for the handshake I’ll shake his hand with my hand on top, firm, but not too hard. If his handshake is bad I’ll fix it by quickly dropping his hand and regrasping it in the proper way. The same with the guy on my left.

    Situation 2: If she’s facing away from the bar waiting… Chances are she’ll see me soon enough. I’ll walk slowly up to them keeping eye contact with her. I’ll get there, she’ll either get up to hug me or I’ll say “up.” I’ll then take her seat. The rest same as above.

    Maybe a drink or two, long enough to meet bare standards of politeness then I’m out. I have shit to do and my own friends to see. If we go to a booth I pick a side then she goes in first and I sit next to her.

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  204. I walk straight to her. I kiss her in the cheek. Looking into her eyes I ask her to introduce me to her friends… Which I do not pay attention to, yet.

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  205. The one thing I don’t get is why you want to stay for long. If the guys are threats you come in, tingle her gina, subtly belittle them, dominate conversatation, then leave. The blitzkreig will leave the memory of your belittling them fresh all night and you can go game other chicks.

    If they aren’t threats, why would you want to hang with betas?

    Like


  206. My first question is, why would you show up at all ? To play it “cool” by ignoring her? Negging her? Or chatting up the Dudes ? Why on Eath would you want to meet her “former co worker?” Who gives a shit ? If you need more friends, buy a fucking puppy. If you decide to show, ( the only reason I can think of is that this chick amuses you for the time being.) Here is what you do :

    Arrive, blow past her, when she tries to grab your attention, literally wave her off with your hand and hit the head. Shake, wash hands, and keep it moving. On your way out , if her ass hasn’t left the stool to approach you, the relationship is over. If it has, give her the “I have to jam, catch up with you later line” and bounce. Period.

    Your only purpose in showing up was to mind fuck her, not get mind fucked. Don’t approach them , it’s her job to move her ass off of that barstool forthfuckingwith upon spotting you

    The fact that your girl thought so little of you that she had the balls to “shit test” you with a “former co worker,” doesn’t speak well of your alpha status to begin with. The minute you approach the trio, your status diminished that much further in her eyes, be it conscious or subconscious. As to not knowing which is the former co worker, who gives a fuck !?! I couldn’t care less if she’s sharing a drink with Father Flanagan.

    If she approached you on the way out, answer one of her numerous calls/texts a few days later. Keep it nonchalant. It’s her job to remind you about the bar. When she brings it up, and she will, your only answer is “What? oh yeah, something came up last minute.” That’s it.. ..no further details. Any nonsense answer will do. You’re a Man, it’s not your job in life to explain shit to women. When she babbles on, tell her she’s wasting time and that she should already be on her way over to you. Give her SPECIFIC instructions and a list of items your happiness requires. For instance….”Wear that French maid outfit/particular undergarments (whatever floats your boat.) Order her to pick up YOUR favorite drink, body oils for the massage she’s going to give you, and whatever else you can think to inconvenience her with on her way over. Then bang her until YOUR satisfied. Again, be SPECIFIC ! Tell her what SHE needs to do to please YOU. When your satisfied send her home…….

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  207. Man, …… I’m just reading some of these comments now…..There are some real rank amateurs posting comments with overthought “Alpha” tactics and “game” scenarios….Let me break it down for you in simpler terms. You show up….You lose. She already thinks you’re a chump by floating this bullshit past you in the first place. Amuse yourself by hitting it again at a time of your choosing and show her the door…..Just for kicks, tell her you knew things were “moving too fast” between the two of you when she asked you to meet her former co worker and you want to be fair because you’re not ready for that type of commitment………..

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  208. Initially I would develop prior to the meeting with the girl, the scenario where by the male co-worker is an AFC who has been friendzoned. Other possibilities could be present, for example she could be weighing you off against the proposed new guy, who has just happened to make his intentions known, so she has asked him out to meet the BF, i.e to play the attention and drama game of seeing two coc*s compete over her.

    The frame I would develop is the one where the girl is dam lucky to be in my presence, and I’ll assume from the off-set, what-ever the value the guys have to offer, is no where near on the scale of what I have to offer, hence the reason in the first place to be knee deep in her pussy on a constant and consistent bases.

    I.e, I’d walk in with a smile, say hello to my girl, look to each of the guys and smile at them and say “Hi I’m xxxx”. And wait for an introduction.

    Then I’d toss in some small talk with the guys, not really reach over or try to get attention from my girl, instead I’d be talking with the guy’s on the subset of gauging my GF reaction to the situation and seeing if my assumptions where correct. I.e if she flirts towards any of these guys, my interest in her would be dipping, further flirtations may make me excuse myself and head off. Either with the idea of going out with the lads and scoring some poon or simply not interested in the drama. My excuse would be “I’m heading back now, you enjoy your night out” and probably toss her a peck on the cheek, i.e refusing to get into any drama or jealousy games. I dislike girls with male orbitors passionately, but I don’t have much of a problem with the odd male work friends out on a drink, this happens.

    On the other hand, if she was trying to reel me in closer to show her interest and the level of interest in me whilst sat with two guys, this is the sort of thing I’d be looking for, not initially, but ideally at some point I would expect my girl to drift by my side and make her intentions known, if she on the other hand is avoiding contact with me, it is clear something else is on the agenda, at that stage if she is your girl, I wouldn’t slip into alpha mode, I’d simply be disappointed with the girl I am dating.

    So I’d approach the crowd, be friendly to the guys, do my thing – enjoy the company and half expect my girl to make a beeline and initiate that comfort connection eventually.

    Being Alpha, the girl would be waiting for you to turn up and the two other guys are simply time fillers, ideally she should be anticipating your arrival, so with me, I only date girls who show a very high interest level, so with that, you don’t have to worry about jealousy or trying to control the situation, because when she has high interest, she will want to be close to you at some point.

    I also detest guys who fawn over girls or try to protect her from some brute, my ideal girl is the one who knows how to say “no”, and comes back to my side, rather than the girl who permits male orbitors than has me and them starting in her own drama show.

    As for game, personally, I wouldn’t be trying to game my chick if she is out with two other guys, i’d be judging to see if I made the right choice when dating her, rather than compete in cock fest. I.e to me the girl is easily replaceable, the girl I’m dating should be aware of my value by now, at least I know she will be, if she is still entertaining other men, I’d be entertaining some other girl, it really is that simple.

    But saying that if my girl said she is on a night out with two men from work, I’d probably arrange a different night out with some mates, perfect opportunity to pull someone else whilst she is debating chop sticks or what-ever with the friendzoned try hard, I’ll be in another bar across town, chatting some other chick up anyway. Or i’d at least be thinking about the next plate to spin.

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  209. As for game, personally, I wouldn’t be trying to game my chick if she is out with two other guys, i’d be judging to see if I made the right choice when dating her, rather than compete in cock fest. I.e to me the girl is easily replaceable, the girl I’m dating should be aware of my value by now, at least I know she will be, if she is still entertaining other men, I’d be entertaining some other girl, it really is that simple.

    But saying that if my girl said she is on a night out with two men from work, I’d probably arrange a different night out with some mates, perfect opportunity to pull someone else whilst she is debating chop stick or what-ever with the friendzoned try hard, I’ll be in another bar across town, chatting some other chick up anyway.

    Double post?

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  210. i find myself two or more attractive sluts, work my way into the middle of their group, flirt loudly with them and then order my girl a drink, when the bartender shows her which playboy sent her a round she will know i am THE alpha and join my table with the swarm of sluts, at which point i will rudely tell the sluts to leave us alone, after number closing the ones that enjoyed my advances.

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  211. This sounds like a female shit test. Anyway, I would walk up to casually stroll up to her and suggest we get a table while ignoring the guys. If she insists on staying at the bar with the guys then I’d crack a joke to the effect that I don’t feel like standing up so I’ll have to catch up with her later. At that point I would casually walk out of the restaurant.

    Girls that throw roadblocks are typically trouble down the road, so get out while you can.

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  212. A few of us have it right (me, str8 up, rum, and that guy…maybe some others I have missed)

    You don’t DATE a girl who shit test you in this way. If she is doing ANYTHING more that truly “showing you off” to her co-workers….which it appears she is, then you need to let this one go…. cut off all emotional attachment and make her another f-ck buddy.

    The bat sh-t crazy girls that are often the most fun to game are NOT relationship material. It will only bring you down and bring you pain.

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  213. In this thread: a bunch of dudes over analysis how to act in front of other dudes.

    Sorry for the back-to-back post, but GOD dont you doofuses, get it? The bigger point of inner game and, well, life in general is enjoying yourself and not letting other people take over your frame/point of view.

    Don’t you get it? If this girl is testing you…then she is toxic. Apply pump and dump principles and don’t give a shit about her as a relationship.

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  214. Can’t envision the scenario to begin with since I loathe bars and choose girlfriends who aren’t interested in hanging out in bars either.

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  215. First off I can’t imagine the invite ever happening. If I’ve been dating a girl for three months with regular sex, we’ve got some sort of reason to be hanging out, some sort of chemistry. Most likely it’s sexual, otherwise it’s romantic pair bonding. And if it’s both we probably live together already. I don’t date girls for the conversation, so I can’t imagine any reason to be invited out to hang with male friends. Can’t picture it. Usually the girl just comes straight to my room and we fuck straight away before anything else. That’s my idea of a date. Going out is for being sexual in public, such as at a disco, or for people watching. Not for meeting her male friends. Ever. It’s weird and why would I?

    So if it’s a weird girl with a notion of male friends, I’d disabuse her of her naivite first off. Males want to fuck you.

    So much background context is missing to just jump right in and say what I would do in that situation. But if it was any type of relationship that I’m familiar with, I’d naively walk up and assume that the girl was way into me and would thrill at my touch and voice, and I’d take her stool and allow her to sit on my lap or push her ass into my crotch. She’d likely kiss me too much. I’d likely drink too much. We’d make some sort of a stupid scene, and then go home and fuck like animals. The end.

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  216. on December 9, 2009 at 9:36 am Patrick Bateman

    First, there is no fucking way I’m rolling in there alone. I would show up with a few guy friends or better yet, one female friend who is inured to my philandering and serves as a willing pawn. I’d make sure Pawn was laughing when we approached the group, probably from a joke I made about the two guys. I’d address the whole group with some typical crap. From this point I would mostly wing the conversation based on their reactions. I’m often in social situations so I’m not worried about finding interesting shit to say. I wouldn’t stay long however; I would have some party or other event planned for me and Pawn to attend and other friends would be there. I would kiss Target right before I left, unless they wanted to come with us. If so, they would be welcome to come to a place where I know everyone important. Pawn would mostly chat up Target at this event while I would hang out with the two guys, introducing them to people and flirting with other girls.

    Target would probably already know Pawn and wouldn’t make any jealous comments about her, but would definitely feel jealous considering Pawn was just as attractive and was clearly closer to me than she was. My body language would subtly prefer Pawn over Target.

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  217. Seems like most of you are overreacting to the smallest hints of anything. This is your girlfriend; stop being so insecure.

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  218. First, when she told me she would be there with an old co-worker, I’d ask her “Oh, is he gay?”

    Her: No, blah blah

    Me: Oh, well you guys have fun. I’ve got shit to do.

    Her: What? It’s not like that..blah blha

    Me: Cool, ya, later.

    Now, at this point she knows I’m not even going to START to fucking play with that bullshit and disrespect. I don’t care if it’s Jesus Christ returned.

    She is a woman. She knows for GOT DAMN sure that isn’t cool. Even if it is a gay friend (which it isn’t), it’s a minimum a shit test, a medium a feeler on what she can pull with a guy she actually DOES want to fuck, and at most you’re already toast and she’s been letting that guy flirt/hit it for some time.

    I wouldn’t even call her when she sends the “What’s wrong?” “Why are you being this way?” texts over the course of the night.

    If you’ve been laying the pipe correctly (brutally and regularly for the first couple months) she’ll get the drama she’s craving by pulling this shit, from the worrying about you all night and how mad you are. Those guys’ game won’t match the gina tingle (Roissy TM) the drama gives her. DON’T ANSWER HER TEXTS. Short of her showing up at your house (where you dick her to death), she blew her communication privileges for the night, and maybe the next day or two.

    When you DO talk to her in a day or two, you play it cool and alpha. Now she KNOWS two things.
    A) You don’t give a FUCK.
    B) She is replaceable
    C) You don’t play when girls try that scandalous ass bullshit. You see it, and you know it, and you don’t play.

    – Bon

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  219. Pretty easy –

    Walk up to her directly and give her a kiss (more like a peck) – no hesitation or waiting for her to come in for a kiss (She is your girl, you don’t need to ask permission or wait for her to indicate she wants a kiss). At most you say “Hey” before kissing her.

    Introduce yourself to the two men – firm handshake, eye contact… just like you would introduce yourself to a customer/supplier in the business world.

    Since there is nowhere to sit I would personally grab my girl by the waist, pull her up, grab her seat and pull her onto my lap. If you’ve been sufficiently Alpha so far you shouldn’t need to worry about her rejecting this action.

    After which I would just join their conversation and have a good night – I have established my claim on the girl, and taken her position at the center of the group… there really isn’t anything more to worry about.

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  220. I would approach my girl from behind, after i assess the situation for body language and waited for a lull in conversation if one arises; if not… at the top of the key on a high laughter note. The synergy would be transferred to me or they would stop laughing and there would be an awkward silence. This is the perfect time to kiss my girl on the cheek to be quick with my introduction to the men in front of her. She will either introduce me immediately after the peck or I will continue with the meet and greet myself. Firm handshakes all around. As i take off my coat or act like I’m looking around for a seat turn to one of the men then ask politely if i may have the seat next to my girl. (they are both sitting in my seat is the way i look at it) or find a way to get in that seat or get my girl out of that situation. If he won’t get up then I know what to expect (some resistance). If he lets me in his old seat and stands up then everything is good to go from here because I am now in the dominant position I wanted and now I am in the social circle.(most likely my face would do all the talking) expressions say it all my friends.

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  221. I like Aoefe’s pinch greeting. In fact, that’s the way I usually greet my wife if I’m meeting her some place in public, especially if she’s faced the other way.

    I think I’d still add a “Hey, do you guys know any good bail bondsmen?” joke (or any harmless opener) as a greeting, to announce my presence (and more importantly, to put them on notice that I ain’t shy) to the other guys.

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  222. on December 9, 2009 at 2:15 pm Mark Baachman

    I wouldn’t even bother showing up in the first place. It’s too much effort and requires an ounce thought. I’m not willing to do that for a chick I’ve already banged for months.

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  223. Mr. Riff – alpha extraordinaire – knows of which he speaks -which is why he liked my greeting. He’s alpha – I’m an alpha lover. 😉

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  224. You enter, sit at bar separately; far enough for her to see you.

    Make no eye contact.

    When she walks over, asked her outside.

    Make out passionaletly, leave.

    Any protest to above, requires breakup.

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  225. on December 9, 2009 at 2:32 pm personal trainer

    aoefe,

    u wanta shack up?

    Like


  226. Have been out of the game for awhile since I’m married, although we’re never truly done gaming :-), and would handle as follows with the following assumptions:

    1. Dating a few months so things should be fairly comfortable and understood by now
    2. She hasn’t done any real shit testing in the past so no need to assume this is one, but as an Alpha will be alert and ready to respond appropriately to such a test
    3. After a few months dating I’ve probably introduced her into some of my social circle and her likewise so we’ve both experienced stepping into the other’s circle with no previous issue or strange games

    Given this senario:
    I’d simply approach the group and make it clear that the girl and I are friends, greet the girl first warmly but with a bit of detached cool but no attitude and watch her reaction. If she’s cool to me then I’d assume a shit test is on, if she’s open and makes it clear she’s with me and initiates physical contact and quickly introduces me to the gentlemen and explains their relationship or simply uses this as an opportunity to exit herself from them if they do not have a relationship then everything is cool and on with the evening.

    If the shit test is on and these guy’s relationship to the girl is ambiguous and remains that way then I’d make short pleasantry with the group and excuse myself to another appointment. I wouldn’t linger any longer than what I’d consider to be polite and certainly not long enough for any tension or attitude to get established. I’m an Alpha, got my own life and don’t have time for silly girl games and have other opportunities to explore and I’m never jeolous although I do get annoyed with silly girl games. I’d let her make next contact after the evening and go from there if there’s anywhere to go. If I consider this worth pursuing after this test, I’ll communicate a rule to handle such situations in the future. If she breaks the established rule than game over for her. If she follows the rule than Alpha is fully established.

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  227. Unless you own this girl then get out of this type of relationship. I girl who pulls this shit is inconsiderate, self absorbed and probably had a poor upbringing. It’s all about interest level as Doc Love would say. Girls with high interest level don’t make their boyfriends constantly run obstacle courses to prove their worth.

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  228. This is easy. I have been married a long time. What would I do if my wife said meet me at some place I am going to introduce you to some Joe Jamoke old friend of hers. I walk in, I see her and these two guys. I don’t even think about it. She’s mine. I walk up to her like there is no one else in the room. I don’t know the two guys are and I don’t care who they are, particularly. I walk up to her, I don’t smile since I don’t know these guys and if they are friends or are nobody or are pestering her or what so I keep some reserve. I lean down so I can get a kiss on the cheek, which is our normal thing, I say something like “you good?” it is barely even verbal, it is basically saying “you ok? anything out of whack here?” Odds are I get a non-verbal yes, so all is well. I stand up and I expect her to introduce me if these people are her friends. Odds are she will, and I will be cordial to them until they give some reason to do otherwise. I see no reason to skulk around or do much calculating. If the woman is yours, act like it. If you are not sure she is, act like it anyway.

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  229. on December 9, 2009 at 10:18 pm unlearning genius ...

    @Roissy,

    Here is the thing you do not seem to get. It is not in the details.

    You don’t get it .. do you? It is the woman’s JOB to keep you around. She will use her tricks .. hot/cold, jealousy ..but the correct answer is always a tacit..”I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT” ..this is the attitude that needs to be internalized .. from this center everything will flow ..

    Let us look now at this specific case. Take the fact that your woman has orbiting guys as a testament to your own prowess and you will look down upon these guys with just a tiny bit of superiority. You will not hover around or play nonverbal territorial games like PDA. Because you are actually unfazed you will act cool.

    This kind of behavior would piss me off in my youth. But I have come to accept that the woman needs to do this to keep things flowing .. part of this is some unpredictible moves from your part, but most of it is just a measured aloofness and true indifference ..

    Remember folks, the battle is always with yourself ..

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  230. No need to get insecure, you’ve been fucking for months and the fact that she invited you suggests she feels uncomfortable being alone with the other guy. Approach her how you normally would approach her and adapt to her initial reaction. If something seems out of sorts, go somewhere else and find another girl to lay pipe on.

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  231. Oh and wait for her to introduce you.

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  232. I’d go, take her arm and switch seats with her. 🙂

    It’s that simple.

    –ck

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  233. on December 10, 2009 at 1:46 am The same Anonymous as from 12/8 10:59pm

    A number of you seem to view this situation as a “shit test”. Perhaps you have never had a woman you fuck regularly actually request to meet up with you at a bar, I don’t know. Try some foreplay or something, maybe it will help.

    Anyways. Shit test. So many of you are “OMG, it’s a shit test, am I going to fail, what do I do?”

    When you have your girl on all fours and are fucking her in her (well-lubed, always use lube) asshole, and you pull out, and grab her by the hair and pull her face onto your cock and tell her to clean it off – that’s a shit test.

    Okay? Otherwise, man the fuck up. “Shit test”, my god, you pussyfuck dipshits. Sigh.

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  234. I still don’t believe in Game. Most of the observations Roissy makes are astute as observations, but they don’t actually help anyone. There seems to be this belief that awareness can change behavior. Or that men somehow have more freewill than women. Every man will behave exactly as alpha or beta or omega or whatever the fuck gay greek letter they actually are. Men are no more capable of faking how attractive they are than a woman is, despite the fact that women are more attracted to status and men are more attracted to looks. Knowing how one “should” behave does not help. Most of us know what we should do. But doing it is a different matter. Picking up women is more like chess than Texas Hold ‘Em. It is a slow game of positioning yourself correctly in life. If you have positioned all your forces correctly, the end game is easy. If not, it is almost impossible. All advice is worthless.

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  235. Game is just another pretty lie — for men.

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  236. Yes there are quite a few clueless replies to this post. Lots of guys confusing ‘Alpha’ with jerkish or asshole behavior trying to cover up some obvious beta insecurities.

    Alpha is not being a domineering, mind fuck playing asshole. Alpha is natural confidence usually displayed with courtesy, grace, sense of humor and character. No need to be a dick or try to create silly psychological games…those just give away an underlying beta nature.

    I’ve been invited and accepted many situations similar to this and rarely had an issue. When it did turn out to be a test and the girl created or allowed an ackward situation, I simply excused myself and moved along.

    There are certainly some basic social tactics to be aware of and that can be used successfully but these are just tactics, they don’t make you an Alpha.

    There are a handful of posts here that are naturally Alpha the rest are either simply dicks or betas trying to parade as Alphas.

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  237. Good scenario. If this was a more casual relationship that I don’t want to progress into anything further I might tell her that “maybe I’ll stop by” but I never would…As a rule I don’t meet my casual gf’s friends.

    In the event that things are a bit more serious and I do decide to meet this chick out with her work buddy, I would probably handle in a fashion similar to this:

    I see the three of them. She is in the middle. I know I can’t take a seat on the outside, I know I can’t just stand in front facing the bar while everyone else sits and I don’t want to sit in the middle facing the bar while they face out. All of these are DLV spots. Knowing this, I’d walk up and say hi to the girl. If she is a girl dating me, she will most likely be excited to see me, and will give me a hug and as social situations go, introduce me to her friends. I would firmly shake hands and introduce myself.

    I like being outgoing when I first meet people rather than trying to intimidate them. I would not be over protective of the young lady in question, but I may put my hand on her shoulder while I am ordering a beer. I’d ask the two guys what beers they were drinking, since this is a place with many drink selections. I may or may not choose a similar beer.

    The most important move would be how I handle the seating arrangement. I would have already scoped out a place for the four of us to move. Once I get my beer I would say, “Lets move to that table over there, it would be more comfortable than all of us sitting up at the bar.”

    Then I would make a move to the most dominant position at that table. Back against the wall facing the rest of the bar. I think this would tackle the biggest obstacle of sitting/standing in an inferior position. From here I’d have the girl sit next to me and I’d put my hand on her knee or thigh. I’d find out who is who once we sat down and I’m pretty good at conversation, so I’d access the situation for further action from there. If they were just merely friends of hers then I may even enjoy our interactions and conversation. I would not be sitting there trying to determine if she banged any of them. That is a waste of time and I probably fuck better than them anyways. A confident man would be able to enjoy himself in nearly all scenarios…

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  238. Yell, as loudly as possible “hey, who does she have to blow around here to get me a drink”.

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  239. Lazarus your posts are those of a fool

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  240. Long time lurker, first post.

    The answer to the OP is there is no ultimate answer. You frame your reaction based upon what you know about your girl. Too many of the responses have these carefully tailored gameplans based upon positioning, moves, placement etc… Totally unbelievable imo…the material of internet fantasy

    If the girl has slut written over her, you have to be more aggressive. She’s more prone to shit testing and jumping ship for more dominant dick.

    If she’s possibly quality, you can be cordial with those guys while still exhibiting your dominance. A quality girl will be turned off by you beating your chest in front of coworkers, bosses, family or friends. Demonstrating value goes above being a big dumb animal.

    If you go slinking around trying to make the girl jealous, you’re either:

    a.) in trouble already

    b.) a delusional internet clown who gets no serious pussy.

    The best responses I’ve read have been where posters detailed entrances that creates connection with the girl, dominance over the guys and reframing of the situation.

    What’s key to remember is the degree of the application sohuld be based upon:

    a.) how slutty you perceive your chick
    b.) how much of a threat you perceive the guys

    Cheers

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  241. “…whose vagina you have penetrated repeatedly and vigorously..”

    GOLD

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  242. You should not have gone to the bar where she is with her co-worker in the first place. I would have texted her with an intentionally lame excuse for not coming (eg. just got a new movie from Netflix I want to watch instead) to demonstrate I’m not going to meet her stupid acquaintances on her term.

    Assuming you do go to the bar (which isn’t terrible obviously, but as I said not something I would do), hug her from behind first and kiss her, and let her make the introductions. Then, participate in the time-honored human ritual of making boring small-talk with people you’d rather disappear until one of them does just that.

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  243. @ Luvsic,

    You are the fool, fool. The premise of Game is that being able to see the matrix is the equivalent of escaping it. Yet the lesson of bioev is this: you have no free will. The projector is in your hindbrain and your conscious is only the movie screen. You might educate yourself well enough to realize the movie screen is a movie screen, but that doesn’t get you any closer to the projector.

    Women are attracted to confidence. You can’t fake confidence. Using the words a confident man would use wouldn’t sound like the same words in the mouth of a less confident one. But if lying to yourself makes you FEEL BETTER, go ahead!

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  244. To Lazarus,
    Your separation of the conscious and subconscious (no need to make analogies to sci-fi movies) seems to be reasonably sound. However the statement ‘you can’t fake confidence’ is just wrong.
    Faking or acting in a certain way – and this entire blog addresses the ways such behaviours can affect women specifically – is entirely within the grasp of the talented thespian. And what’s more it can be learned, practiced and refined like any other art form.
    It’s interesting you have (quite rightly) identified the subconscious as that immutable, pre-programmed part of the brain which cannot easily be changed; since if you read most of the articles and comments in this forum closely you’ll notice that it is precisely these deep-seated belief systems, ideals, and emotions (again, in women specifically) which Game attempts to identify and exploit.

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  245. My girlfriend is a 9 and 26 years younger than I am…and I wouldn’t be the least bit jealous in such a situation. I would arrive and introduce myself and learn about them while maybe standing from behind her and snuggling her hair – depending on whether she recently washed it. I would do that regardless of whether the others were male or female.

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  246. Wait a second…I think I see the test here…Roissy wants to see if we’re smart enough to step back and see an even bigger picture:

    I would NOT be able to go to this meeting because the two men in question would then be in a position to recognize me when I am out with another woman and then tell her.

    The fewer friends and family you meet of a woman, the better odds you have of having several girlfriends even in one city.

    Meeting the guys would wreck the harem.

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  247. Roissy, you’re a bum — you comment the Hell out of some posts, then you take a post like this one and leave the question hanging. What’s the point of posing a test when you aren’t gonna tell us your answer?

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  248. * Who do you address first?

    The group as a whole.

    * How do you address them?

    “Looks like a Madonna concert over here” (suggesting GF is hot and the guys are faggy dancers, or putting her on pedestal). Refer to group as “kids”. Refer to the guys as “boys”

    * Do you wait for your girl to introduce you or do you thrust your hand in promptly, prodding handshakes?

    She should do this instantaneously, but if not, then intro self. With solid eye contact and handshake. Consider pulling a George W, and giving them nicknames.

    * Do you put an arm over your girl’s shoulder?

    Absolutely not. You need to let these jokers know you are alpha before you touch her. If you can’t stake out your territory with your personality, then well, you’re fucked.

    * Do you kiss her upon meeting?

    Not if you can avoid it. If she tries, “I’ve got a cold comin’ on sugar.”

    Or do you keep a few feet of distance between you and her in the interest of avoiding the perception of “boyfriendiness”?

    Yes. Work the guys. You want to establish your funny, dominant personality, while making them look somewhat submissive and foolish.

    1. Be that friendly, gregarious guy. Walk tall with a shoulder swagger like Tom Brady after a SuperBowl win.

    2. Buy a round, if glasses are not full. Something kinda faggy for the guys, like Singapore Slings. Big tip for the bartender, out of sight, for better service for yourself later.

    3. Be polite to the guys, but generally take no interest in what the guys say. Throw in a minor neg such as “Wives let you outta the house tonight, boys?”

    4. Try to get your back to the bar. Try to remain standing, for dominance. Play a game or make a bet to get people moving around. Begin the storytelling.

    5. Encourage the guys to go hit on other women. Make bets. Tell him some girl was checking him out.

    el chief

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  249. some good thoughts here, but we need to back up for a second. the general feeling these posts exude is that this is a somewhat scary challenge and not pure fun.

    if this is what it feels like to you, then it is a mistake to let her lead you into this situation to begin with. is it wrong to push one’s comfort zone and enter potentially uncomfortable situations? no. is it wrong to let her lead you into such situations? definitely yes.

    if she presents you with a challenge on her terms, is it alpha to take on the challenge and beta to chicken out? no. it is alpha not to take the bait. you need not respond to her suggestion at all. or you might suggest a different plan for the night.

    this is a situation where you come in in a slightly weaker position. choose such handicaps if and only if you are confident that you will dominate nevertheless: the handicap then highlights your strength.

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  250. I don’t understand why so many people here won’t accept a kiss from her in this scenerio? Her giving you a kiss makes you head of the pack, above the two other guys.

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  251. KM3,

    You might be right. I’m starting to come around to the idea of giving game a chance. Let me restate the premise of game, if I may. It works (perhaps) because we aren’t adapted to the world in which we live. Women are attracted to men with status and in caveman times there was no faking it. But these days it is all bells and whistles. Grown men play video games because their brains think they are being productive, and thus attractive to women. In a thousand years there will likely be no video games, because video game players won’t get laid often enough.

    But men can just as likely use the bells and whistles in our favor. Instead of playing video games, we can be the video game for women. I can sort of see that working.

    I still think it is very hard to fake confidence, but perhaps there is something to be gained on the margin. Game may be the equivalent for men as make-up tips for women. I have trouble believing it helps any more than that.

    I find it interesting that the idea of playing “hard to get” has existed in pop culture for at least the past hundred years for women, but probably only for about the past ten years for men. I realize there is more to game than “hard to get” but I think it captures a major spirit of it. Interesting that women caught on seemingly so many generations ahead, at least in pop culture.

    In Pushkin’s, the great 1/4 black 19th century Russian poet
    s, work: The Negro of Alexander the Great, he writes of his myriad sexual conquests. His strategy was very different from the strategy of Game, usually resorting to declaring love to virgins in order to defile them and move on. But that was a different society. Game sounds like a strategy for a game particular to contemporary America, in which financially independent women no longer have to think about practical social concerns, yet are still attracted to seemingly high-status males in their hind-brains.

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  252. Peter the Great, Alexander the Great, whatever. Still interesting that the greatest Russian stud (and poet) of the 19th century was 1/4 Black-African. I doubt many people realize this.

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  253. Just read the Wiki page of Pushkin, which makes him sound like a loser because his wife ended up cheating on him. But keep in mind he didn’t marry this woman until he was 62, and she was much younger. No game lasts forever. The Wiki page completely ignores that he was Don Juan most of his life, and the portraits of him clearly downplay his blackness.

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  254. This is definitely one of the most entertaining websites I’ve seen in a while. Are all of you actually dumb enough to think that acting this way doesn’t make you look like a total douchebag? Seriously how many of the posts on here are actually made by 40 year old virgins sitting in their moms basement?

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  255. Just discovered this page randomly. I like eloquent writing of the poster.

    About this scenario, my woman does not meet men in bars, period. If she even so much as asks if she can meet a man in a bar, I will know I have undergone an alarming shrinkage of the testes and make the necessary corrections.

    Been with her for a few months? Bright red lipstick in a dimly lit bar? Bwahaha. By then she’ll have long been wearing my virtual collar, and known that even remotely hinting at this is grounds for punishment.

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  256. Actually did this once, not with a girl I was banging but here’s what I did. There was a stack of old newspapers for some reason in the corner of the place. I grabbed one, rolled it up, went up behind the girl and smacked her on the ass with it (or at least the upper part of her ass because the bottom was on the seat). She let out a little scream and turned around and when she saw me immediately hugged me, and in those few seconds she had completely forgotten the dudes sitting next to her. Shocked her system.

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