If You Call A Girl By Another Girl’s Name

Don’t panic. Carry on as if your flub didn’t happen. The worst thing you could do would be to call attention to your crushing of your Special Snowflake’s special-ness. Don’t feel guilty. Guilty players have got no rhythm. Guilt will compel you to reflexively atone for sins real and imagined.

YOU: Seduce seduce seduce Heather seduce seduce seduce.

HER: You just called me Heather. My name’s not Heather.

YOU: Oh yeah, how ’bout that. Weird. One of my little nieces is named Heather. You must remind me of her somehow. Maybe the brattiness?

I have mixed up the names of plenty of girls. It happens a lot when I’m dating three or more girls concurrently. I will whip myself into a psychocathartic herbpulp later for the grossly misogynistic thing I’m about to say [yes, yes I will, I surely will], but you ladies all blend into one another when I’m sitting across from you at the bar sharing drinks and a story from your life. I can remember the details of how your asses meet the backs of your thighs, but your nonprofit jobs and travels to “that really amazing and beautiful” place somewhere in the world where a million other girls of your station in life went to for slutcation just sort of melds into a buzzing grrlnoize of boring mindrot. And so it is without malice of heart that I explain the rather prosaic reason for why I sometimes get you, Dasha, mixed up with you, Julie. If I were a beta who only managed to date one woman per year and consequently obsessed over that one woman, I might do better at remembering your names.

So take it as a positive sign that you have successfully captured the attention of an alpha male when he mixes up your name with that of his “niece”. You don’t want no fake alpha, ladies!

Similarly, I will sometimes forget your names during our courtship. I mean blanking out completely. Don’t take it personally, though. I’m a busy guy with lots of important thoughts in my head, like how to raise my status so that more pretty girls like you are drawn to my sexual dynamism. When I forget your name, I feel embarrassed, but I won’t ever let it show. Instead, I will either a) wait for someone else to address you and recoup your name that way, b) sneak a peek at your license, or c) say “I have a confession to make… [PAUSE WITHOUT SMILING]… I have forgotten your name.” Please note the past participle form of that last sentence; the passive voice helps the medicine go down.

This has never failed me. The one time I forgot a girl’s name and attempted to rescue the situation by “being myself”, I paid for it with no sex.





Comments


  1. You would never forget Lady Rain(e)’s name though. So It Must Be True Love. I’m quite jealous.

    Surely with your knowledge of culture, you could make up a reference that’s less creepy than comparing your date to your niece. Maybe a character in a movie you can’t remember? I’m sure you can get away with the niece thing, but that seems to be more despite the pedo. overtoned reference.

    I will whip myself into a psychocathartic herbpulp later for the grossly misogynistic thing I’m about to say [yes, yes I will, I surely will], but you ladies all blend into one another when I’m sitting across from you at the bar sharing drinks and a story from your life

    Why mightthis the piece of misogyny you show a vestige of guilt for in the dark chambers of your battered, envenomed, steel-encased heart?

    [yes, yes I will, I surely will]

    Yes, yes you won’t, you surely won’t.

    Like


  2. There were a couple of really basic but incredibly useful little gems I picked up on this blog:

    – hold your drink low

    – write all your texts/emails as though they were to be displayed on a public jumbotron for everyone to judge upon its alpha/betatude

    – if you say something dumb or beta, don’t backbedal, just pretend it never happened.

    Like


  3. PA

    – if you say something dumb or beta, don’t backbedal, just pretend it never happened.

    Her: “OMG, you love meee?!?! I kinda love you too!”
    Him: Oh crap she heard that, I shouldn’t have taken those extra shots. Why wasn’t she asleep? “What are you talking about? I love you? You must’ve dreamed that.”
    Her: “I wasn’t asleep! I heard you!”
    Him: “… you’re imagining things.”
    Her: “You have issues.”
    Him: “You’re the one making shit up, bitch.”

    Now, children, what happens next?

    Like


  4. PA mentions, “…public jumbotron…”

    That is so Invader Zim. I am so using that.

    The Official Public Jumbotron of Gonadal DOOM! or something.

    Like


  5. ”””””’Instead, I will either a) wait for someone else to address you”””””””’

    hahahah

    Just make up a nickname.

    Address all woman the same.

    Like


  6. Spank that ass till its red bhetti spank that ass till its red.

    Like


  7. “I have a confession to make… [PAUSE WITHOUT SMILING]… I have forgotten your name.” Please note the past participle form of that last sentence; the passive voice helps the medicine go down.

    There is no passive voice in that sentence. Passive would be: “Your name has been forgotten by me.”

    Like


  8. Arpagus: roissy couldn’t do passive even if he tried, apparently.

    [editor: a man’s gotta know his limitations.]

    Like


  9. I will sometimes forget your names during our courtship.

    er… Mulva?

    Like


  10. I can never fucking think of a good nickname for a girl. The best I ever had was “kiddo”. The girl actually liked that, but it felt weird as she was a few years younger than me.

    [editor: “kid” is a great pet name to call a girl. for some reason, girls really like that term of dominance.]

    Like


  11. Bhetti–

    picking up from the awkward place you left PA

    Him: I’m not about loving bitches that aren’t crazy in love with me so you must have imagined it.

    Her: Um, well I might be, you know.

    Him: Well might doesn’t cut it. Never mind. No need to rush it. It’s inevitable anyway you know. Tell me when you can’t bear not to.

    Her: I think I do, really. It felt so good to hear that from you.

    Him: yeah well can we drop this? Say something entertaining. Or just come her so that I can kiss you. And use you, sex bitch.

    Her: ? (your move)

    Like


  12. Arpagus–

    There is no passive voice in that sentence.

    I had the same thought. But not being an aspiring Latin teacher, I wasn’t so pedantic as to express it.

    Like


  13. I ended up saying “Caroline. That was a street name I had to memorize today. Had to pick up a friend there,” just this week. I like niece better. I think I will say friend’s daughter instead. Lower chance of getting caught.

    “Heather, Michelle…hmmmm….. I think you look more like a Michelle.” is an OK neg.

    I have also fessed up. “Bwahahaaaa that’s funny. I just called you Yasmin. haha.” She laughed right along. “Woohoo, come back, you are not in Turkey any more. Hello. hahaha.”

    “Woah, that was a totally hippy dippy idea. Can I call you moonbeam?” If yes, you call her moonbeam for a while.

    Like


  14. If a guy is seeing each girl just once a week, not talking on the phone with her very much in between, not adding then stalking her on Facebook, etc. I can see how this could happen. If a girl gets mad about it then she’s sort of a fool for thinking things were more serious than they are!

    To fip it a lil bit, when I’ve forgotten a guy’s name it’s been similar – if he hasn’t been very aggressive about pursuing me (e.g., disappears between infrequent meet-ups which, doesn’t call just to share his day and ask about mine), then it’s easy to forget not only names but his job and other details.

    It’s just normal on both sides to forget names of the people who you don’t have a deep emotional connection with if you are a busy social person.

    Like


  15. on July 27, 2009 at 8:21 pm Backdoor Man

    “Guilty players have got no rhythm.”

    Roissy is an 80s man. Awesome. I didn’t care much for that song (Wham’s “Careless Whispers”) growing up, but when I was living abroad for the first time and was really missing American music, that song came on the radio, and damn, it was the best song ever. It still sticks with me. And this was the same living-abroad spell when, in my head, I was able to replay every.single.detail from Rush’s “Vital Signs.” That lucidity, built from memory and fabrication, was unreal.

    Sorry for the rambling….I’m working late in the office and drinking Jack Daniels.

    Like


  16. Program your brain to say “kid” or “honey-child” or babe by default. If you can accurately recall their real name by all means use it but have yourself trained to keep control of the naming process. Using a wrong name is like fumble in football. You can recover and even gain yardage but it is still not something many would choose to do.

    Like


  17. on July 27, 2009 at 8:39 pm Backdoor Man

    I call my old lady “woman” all the time (or “mujer” if we are speaking in Spanish). It slips out sometimes with other girls, even at work. In the kitchen at lunchtime, I’ve actually said to a co-worker I barely knew, “woman, what are you eating?” She looked at with me amusement, and even a sense of having been flattered, and asked, “did you just call me ‘woman?'”

    “Yup,” I said.

    Like


  18. Doug:
    It is clear as day what the next move is:

    Her: ‘Yes, sir.’

    The rest is not suitable for public consumption.

    Rum: They banned us calling patients ‘love’. This makes me sad.

    Why can’t well call bed no. 2 [Mr. Who?] honey???

    So much identity is wrapped up in names, when what is remarkable about someone is their story.

    Or to roissy, their… well it kinda rhymes with story/roissy.

    Like


  19. It’s called present perfect tense.

    Like


  20. this has never happened to me. i have an extremely good and long memory, very rarely fails, so once i cement a chick’s name it’s there. i’ve never done roissy volumes, obviously, and i think that indulging “special snowflake” thinking is invaluable in courtship. i am a practitioner of “nice guy” game (=!= supplicating-beta game), not asshole game, and i’m generally a good listener.

    @bhetti- “the dark chambers of your battered, envenomed, steel-encased heart” – really? weren’t you the one that posted roissy’s few (what, 2? 3?) romatic and non-misogynist links a few weeks ago? i agreed with you then – our host has a cynical streak, and plays to his male and pasionately anti-misandrist audience, but is not a dyed-in-the-wool misgynist. (right?)

    @roissy- “kid” or “kiddo” is hard to improve upon – ex., Bogey: “here’s looking at you, kid.”

    Like


  21. Betas date one woman a year? Hey, that’s a notch count of 15 if you marry in your early 30s. Few will complain about that.

    Like


  22. when i first started dating my current girlfriend, i’d usually fall asleep earlier than her when she’d stay the night b/c i’d have to get up for work in the a.m….i was deathly afraid that i’d mumble in my sleep and call her by my ex-girlfriend’s name….

    don’t know what i’d have done if i did, but if it happens in the future i’m going to follow this advice. it’s harder though if the girl you’re mis-named *knows* the chick who’s name you actually said.

    Like


  23. maurice–

    @roissy- “kid” or “kiddo” is hard to improve upon – ex., Bogey: “here’s looking at you, kid.”

    Yeah.

    As for Bhetti. Sometimes she wants to appear rough and tough.

    And… I think she’s quite ambivalent about males going whole hog on the Roissy lifestyle. Not about game, or male macho, etc. at all. Just about what to do with it. She is attracted to players. But wants them to be somewhat reformed or quantity satiated. Hence older players have appeal. For that and other reasons.

    Like


  24. “kid” or “kiddo” is hard to improve upon

    I like “Missy” when in cocky/funny mode. But you gotta pronounce it kinda like “misseh!”

    Like


  25. maurice: Yes, some hearts beat more strongly after surviving many beatings, but…

    plays to his male and pasionately anti-misandrist audience, but is not a dyed-in-the-wool misgynist.

    Shh, don’t let the secret out.

    The last thing we need is a female audience going ‘Aw, he’s lovely really’

    [editor: i’m afraid you would be sorely disappointed. now, had you said ‘aw, he’s supersexxxy really’ you’d be onto something.]

    based on glimpses of real roissy under badboy roissy and then we’d have The World’s Hottest Blogstar or something.

    Noone wants that. (right?)

    Like


  26. you’re such an asshole, Roosh!

    [editor: lol. well played.]

    Like


  27. Doug: Now my secrets are revealed?? I want all of you players happily LTRed and having babies with a lovely, sweet woman.

    Quelle horreur!

    Albeit there can be some exceptions. Roissy can stick to his progeny=legacy strategy.

    roissy:

    [editor: i’m afraid you would be sorely disappointed. now, had you said ‘aw, he’s supersexxxy really’ you’d be onto something.]

    Clarification of what I meant: the glimpses of being Not Completely Evil = from reluctant suppressed sexual attraction to Total Obsession in Rationalising Heaven. Thus it comes out ‘he’s lovely, really’ when what they mean is ‘it’s alright to liektotally want him.’

    I may have unwittingly inflicted this on LR using those links. Sorry, LR.

    Like


  28. “Sweetheart” and “muffin” can be OK when said patronizingly. I remember someone trying to counteract something I said in a philosophy tutorial once, and appended “muffin” to the end to make it sound extra pejorative. It worked.

    Like


  29. Some questions about forgetting her name. Here is the scenario, a true story.

    I was a witness once to blood being drawn in a disputed paternity, with the man, woman, and baby all in the room. We asked the woman to identify the man, and she, as required by law, identified him by his name. We asked the man the same question. He looked at here and responded:
    “I am sorry, but I have forgotten your name.”
    He blushed.

    Questions:
    Was that omga, beta or alpha or just plain stupid?
    What should he have called her? Kid? Kiddo? My little putsy?
    What could he have said to re-establish control? Maybe, something like, “If I had wanted to have a kid with you, I would have learned your name.”

    Having established that looks cannot kill that day, will she seek to destroy his life and all his works and seed (except her own?)

    What I learned that day is that I CAN suppress a laugh.

    Anyway, I once called a girl by another’s girl name. No long term damage, as she married me anyway, assuming that you don’t consider marriage long term damage.

    Like


  30. Not remembering a girl’s name can be a game killer.

    But . . . if a girl calls you out for not remembering her name, don’t act in any way apologetic. Instead, immediately ask her if she remembers your name. Chances are she won’t and you can save the set.

    Like


  31. on July 27, 2009 at 9:47 pm Indomitable Thoughts

    “You should never ever say a name if you don’t have to. Nicknames are the utmost importance so that you don’t have to worry about it.”

    I think George Bush did this.

    Like


  32. joel:

    I once called a girl by another’s girl name. No long term damage, as she married me anyway, assuming that you don’t consider marriage long term damage.

    Him: “Heather, marry me.”
    Her: “You just called me Heather. That’s not my name.”
    Him: Choose from the following options:
    A.”You don’t need your name. You’re going to be called bitch-muffin anyway.”
    B. “The condition of you marrying me is that you change your name to Heather. It’s my bratty niece’s name. I like it. I want you to have her name.”
    C. “Insolence! You have now earned a spanking!”
    D. “Do you remember MY name?”
    E. “Where are my brain cells today?! No long-term harm done!”
    F. “I forget names all the time. It’s normal. Why do people even have names?”

    Like


  33. G. I was joking, [her name here]. You know I love ya, babe. Whatddya say?

    Like


  34. g. if I label you I negate you and you are too beautiful to want to negate.

    Like


  35. Clearly you need more Shaneequas and Latonas in the mix.

    Like


  36. on July 27, 2009 at 10:18 pm HUNGRY HUNGRY HIPPOS YO

    Funny article. Unapologetically misogynstic, but it doesn’t make your observations on human nature and gender dynamics any less true, much to the dismay of the haters.

    Like


  37. @Thursday:

    “Not remembering a girl’s name can be a game killer.

    But . . . if a girl calls you out for not remembering her name, don’t act in any way apologetic. Instead, immediately ask her if she remembers your name. Chances are she won’t and you can save the set.”
    I can see a lot of ways this could play out.

    Scenario 1: (slut scenario)
    Her: You don’t remember my name!
    Him: But you don’t remember mine either.
    Her: Of course I do! You’re Mr. [insert day of week here]

    Scenario 2:
    Her: You don’t remember my name!
    Him: Doubt you can remember mine.
    Her: Mystery. No? Uh…Style? Matador?

    Scenario 3: (best scenario)
    Her: You don’t remember my name!
    Him: But you don’t remember mine.
    Her: Yes I do! *Gets his name right*
    Him: Well, cupcake, looks like I’ll have to make a nickname for you. But only I can call you that.

    Like


  38. maurice:

    G. I was joking, [her name here]. You know I love ya, babe. Whatddya say?

    lessthan3, maurice.

    Gunny:

    g. if I label you I negate you and you are too beautiful to want to negate.

    Confuse her with something Deep and Spiritual Sounding.

    The lateral approach!

    vainofstars: H. “I see… you have a problem against white folk names? Fine, you’re Shaneequa from now on. But this is the last time I’m pandering to your race issues, woman.”

    Like


  39. It’s called masochism.

    Like


  40. @bhetti – NO! not like that. you misread me. but, i have to say, heath ledger carries off that intrinsically beta move as well as anyone could have. still awful, though. that’s your crappy romance-novel fem-doctrination oozing out. 🙂

    Like


  41. LR –

    oh yeah i forgot to add….Slut.

    Like


  42. -Skeptic-

    I used to run solo all the time.
    In a packed bar or club its easy to roll solo.
    There are a few strategy’s.

    All you need to do is friend one person in a group- man or woman.
    Talk to a dude for a while- talk to his group, then go to another group- the other group will automatically assume those are your friends.

    That’s all there is to that.
    Or
    If someone asks where your friends are point somewhere far away. No one is going to go to that group to ask if you belong.

    In a packed bar at 12:30 on a Saturday with standing room only groups scatter. You just need to be seen talking to some men here and there, and people will assume those are friends.

    As far as one night stands at bars: you are crazy if you think same night lays don’t happen.
    Growing up one of my buds was a cocky funny natural- ultra aggressive- he fucked chicks that looked like (or were) amateur models in night club bathrooms- or back at their Manhattan pads.
    He would grab a girls hand and yank her into his cock- she would either slap him or grind him. After 20 minutes or so- Then he would kiss and finger her- then try to fuck her right then and there or get back to her place as quickly as possible
    This was 10 years ago- and I was in fucking awe! Just fucking awe.

    He was tall 6’2 6’3- so he could get the model club chicks.
    I remember one time he introduced me to a girl he was fucking- sweet girl, pretty girl, after she left he told me how the first time they met he blew a load in her hair.
    She was just one whore out of many to him- and he treated her like shit- me the afc- I would have loved the girl and never done that to her.

    I could never understand how he got so much pussy. I would get so fucking angry- I would buy them flowers take them to dinner, listen to their problems- and after they put me in the LJBF box they would go to someone’s house just like his to take it in the ass without lube.

    An entire generation of men lied to!
    An entire generation of men taught chivalries, always acting nice, and non sexual to women- yet they live celibate lives.

    Like


  43. maurice: LOL, I know! Brilliant reaction, maurice, love it.

    But apparently it is my femdoctrination that finds that utterly illegal OTT song sexy. Not me, personally. Or maybe it’s just [RIP] Heath Factor.

    I was really more picturing one of those old films. And, for some reason, you are smoking a cigar. Youtube does not cooperate.

    Game in BK:

    An entire generation of men lied to!
    An entire generation of men taught chivalries, always acting nice, and non sexual to women- yet they live celibate lives.

    It’s amazing that people/men would buy this if the end goal is sex asap.

    I understand buying it if the goal was more courtship.

    Like


  44. On chivalry v. asshole game:

    I was talking to my boyfriend about this, and he talks about how he purposely tries to balance both sides–the mean one he uses to make fun of people, and the nice one that is caring, listening, family-oriented etc.

    The problem, he said, with nice guys is that they surpress their teasing side, their sexual side. The problem with assholes is that they ONLY focus on their asshole and sexual side.

    I thought it was a pretty interesting insight.

    Like


  45. @ Arpagus

    There is no passive voice in that sentence. Passive would be: “Your name has been forgotten by me.”

    !!!

    ❤

    Like


  46. lol @ Mandy giving game tips

    Like


  47. @LILGIRL/Arpagus:

    I know. That grammatical correction made me swoon too.

    Like


  48. @heloise- i have been known to smoke the occasional cigar. and as far as i know, thankfully, i’ve never been featured on YouTube.

    compare heath in that clip to the may beta of the month, the “I LOVE YOU LAUREN” ex-marine wuss dude. heath comes across significantly better, even though it’s basically the same kind of thing. i guess that’s the power of stardom for you. and to think he was also the evil joker and the buttfucking cowboy…

    Like


  49. maurice: It is how you play it. He’s performing. More doing it for fun than sincerity. More a stylish “I’m sorry” involving The Crowd swooning and social pressure that way.

    From what I remember when I watched that movie when I was a kid from my view, was that he was hot and I didn’t know who he was then. And that heroine was mean. So not quite that.

    LILGRL/S: Arpagus is stigmatised by me as The Computer [credit to whoever mentioned Gentle Art of Verbal Self Defence eons ago].

    Like


  50. @LILGRL, S.- geez, you’re easy. if grammar corrections make you swoon, just think what a strong man could do to you armed with a copy of Strunk & White.

    Like


  51. If you’ve forgotten the name of the girl you can get when your number closing her. After you key in the digits, innocently ask, “how do you spell your name?” there are so many female names with multiple spellings. but even if its a basic, easily spelled name like Mary, you have plausible deniability.

    nicknaming is a great tactic in this scenario as well. “missy” is a great one. sometimes I use “champ”. each of these has a different connation and is appropriately used in different situations. if you already have a sexual, flirtatious vibe and she is wearing a skirt… call her “skirt”. e.g. “hey skirt!, get over here!” motioning with a cock of your head and alpha grin. if she has her legs on display, call her “legs”. same principle. its slightly cavemanish. you can use it in this fashion or ironically if you both are on that level.

    Like


  52. lol @ Huck Finn’s face.

    I third S and LilGrl on the grammar correction. I think it’s because it brings forth all my knight in shining armor/prince fantasies.

    Oh, Hamlet…

    Like


  53. maurice: perfect tense-ing. I like your recipe. Forget Karma Sutra, bring out The Elements of Style. Throw in a Roget’s. Add some Shoots and Leaves.

    Ah, there is something to this:
    Smoothtalkers and silvertongues.

    Like


  54. @Bhetti:

    Being the “Computer” is worthy of stigma? It’s somewhat of a turn-on to me. Maybe that reflects badly on myself… Ha.

    Like


  55. Mandy: Get thee to a nunnery!

    Hamlet’s no knight in shining armour.

    The only thing he can be counted on for is pretty prose and death.

    Like


  56. Scratch that. Logic-speak does it for me because I’m in Philosophy.

    Like


  57. “It’s my lack of paying attention to things that people say.”

    Hello understatement of the year.

    Like


  58. Forgetting a girl’s name is not a big deal as long as you are prepared for the oncoming shit test. This also applies to forgetting other small pieces of information about a girl, even one that you’ve known for a considerable amount of time.

    Recently, I was talking with a FB of mine that I’ve known for about a year and at some point in the conversation it was revealed that I had forgotten her age. Like clockwork, she started pouting but I made it clear that her disappointment meant nothing to me. As I continued to push the conversation forward with C&F, she says to me, out of nowhere, “god, you are so fucking hot.”

    Like clockwork, gentlemen.

    Like


  59. Heloise and Abelard?

    ” ‘Tis a consummation devoutly to be wished.”

    LR?

    “O that your too, too solid flesh would melt, thaw, and resolve itself into a week-old rancid pool of beta-made marinara sauce.”

    roissy?

    “To boff or not to boff … that is the question. Whether ’tis nobler to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous priapism, or to take arms against a sea of twats, and by gaming, nail them. To lie, to fuck… To Fuck, perchance to Climax, and thereby blow the thousand natural loads that cocks are heir to.”

    The rest is silence.

    Like


  60. @Bhetti:

    He’s still the Prince of Denmark.

    And ssh, I’m not Ophelia.

    Like


  61. Heloise & Abelard
    12th century Europe was not a good time and place for game. The better you were at it, the more likely you would get killed, or worse A lot worse. Nonetheless, those two probably had more righteous fucks than the average monk nun of that era.

    Like


  62. monk and nun

    Like


  63. yeah, not only did they get married in the end, but abelard was actually castrated. (maybe that’s why doug wants to keep the relationship long-distance?) i only picked those nicknames, during the e-courtship phase a efw months ago, out of affection and tribute to a pair of history’s most legendary lovers. and also bhetti’s nun-like existence in medical school.

    also, i see that i crudified the Shakespeare, in opposition to the spirit of literary sophistication that was being admired by the women. so i guess i blew it. it was funny to me, at least. to thine own self be true.

    Like


  64. Dammit, PA & Mulva, you beat me to it again!!

    ROTFLMAO until I realize that all too many here are too young to get the reference.

    Like


  65. The Mulva refernce? Seinfeld is eternal. It will live on long after we have all crossed this Earth and perished.

    Like


  66. @maurice:

    Ok, so you make funny Shakespeare spinoffs, then you ruin it by quoting Polonius.

    Why on earth did you quote Polonius?

    Like


  67. S:

    Being the “Computer” is worthy of stigma? It’s somewhat of a turn-on to me.

    One word: Spock.
    And his fandom.

    maurice: That was gold. The rest was comical, but the bit re: heloise & abelard…

    yeah, not only did they get married in the end, but abelard was actually castrated.

    Yeah, I have mentioned (okay, ranted at some length) how I hate tragedies.

    Mandy: Ophelia didn’t go to a nunnery (aka medical school apparently;) ). Look what it got her.

    You stay away from dem princes, you hear me? They’re nothin’ but spoiled and lazy trouble — none of the good kind, either — them royalty types. All the Arab ones I may know [at a safe distance] are, anyway.

    Like


  68. The headline says it all

    Pravda – Woman sucks her men dry in bed like female spider

    http://english.pravda.ru/society/stories/20-06-2009/107817-female_spider-0

    Like


  69. Being shitty with names has nothing to do with my memory. It’s my lack of paying attention to things that people say.

    Translation: “It’s all about ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME! So why should *** I ***, the most special of all special princess snowflakes, pay attention to anything that doesn’t pertain directly to ME?”

    You just have to know how to speak DumbFuckingBitch. It’s a difficult language to learn at first, but after a while you get the hang of it.

    Like


  70. I tend to call all women (outside of work) sweetheart or darlin’.

    Had a girl back at my place recently and couldn’t remember her name so I just said “This may be really rude but I’ve forgotten your name” which segued into introductions, a jokey handshake and then make out. Was in my bed within 10 more minutes. True story.

    Like


  71. on July 28, 2009 at 7:51 am Sebastian Flyte

    Just mess up some more.

    ‘Heather? Oh wait, sorry. Justine? Samantha? Claire? Sorry, definitely Tanya, you don’t have to tell me twice.’

    Like


  72. It’s “Katto the Irrelevant” again with another link to something totally off-topic — but I know it will be of burning interest to many regulars here. It’s a recent column by Ralph Peters, who WRITES AND THINKS LIKE A REAL MAN. Maybe a wrongheaded one, but a real man nonetheless.

    http://www.securityaffairs.org/issues/2009/16/peters.php

    (Just read it! Don’t comment on it here.)

    Like


  73. on July 28, 2009 at 9:12 am The Snatch Whisperer

    Just calling them ‘girl’ works wonders. Its along the lines of kid or kiddo but it works better for me and they respond better. I often use it lightheartedly in an opener. ‘Hey girl, who let you out of the house looking like that?’
    I continue to use it even after I know her name and I find it leads to a lot of qualifying on her part.

    Like


  74. just a l’il LTR game tip a propos of this post if anyone cares:

    i didn’t notice that for the first three years or so we were together my now husband didn’t say my name until he pointed it out. my name is pronounced dah-na, like however you pronounce banana and in his head and mouth he could only hear and say “day-na” and didn’t want to call my by the wrong name all of the time. he still very very rarely calls me by my 1st name, usually just says babe.

    the interesting result of this is that on the very rare occasions he DOES use my name, either in anger, love or lust–it is SO powerful. just saying my first name has become a weapon in his dominance quiver and the sound of it either drives me wild or brings me to heel, depending on the tone.

    Like


  75. @dana – book ’em. (your new avatar will help.) so “babe” works for you better than “kid”, “sweetie”, etc. … ? and what would you do if he called you by the *wrong* name? (per the post.)

    Like


  76. Occasionally I will call a girl by the wrong name. It happens…In the event that I remember her name, but just called her the wrong name, I always do the following:

    Deny, Deny, Deny! Jessica will know she heard me call her Michelle, but she will start doubting herself.

    “I didn’t call you Michelle, I think are are losing your mind Jessica…”

    Deep down…they know! I almost get the impression that they like it! They may keep asking…that is a sign they are doubting themselves. If you break and tell them you did accidental call her Michelle, game over, you lose. You will most likely be going home alone tonight. Stick to your guns! She can question herself all night, but you still get the victory. (I like referring to sex as a victory) If you want, you can tell her after sex but that’s your call. I prefer to keep them questioning their sanity….

    Like


  77. maurice

    if after 6 years he called me by some other female name i’d probably kill him and there is no doubt he would kill me for it now. i think its very common when ppl first start going out though, my first man i lived with mumbled his ex’s name at me the first week we lived together 1st thing in the morning–he had just broken up withher and they had lived together

    once when i first started seeing my husband i called HIM by my ex’s name–i had been broken up with my ex of 8 yrs for only about a year when we met–i FELT it happen in my brain, i had spoken to my mother earlier about the past and when my mind reached for a name to put in the “insert loved one’s name here” part of a sentence later that day when talking to bill, it pulled up the wrong name. he was livid and i was mortified–we got over it though 🙂

    Like


  78. i use ‘girl’ , ‘babe’ and ‘you’

    Like


  79. Guys in Mandy! XD’s life don’t have that problem. They just leave the money on the dresser and mosey out…to the Young Communists meeting.

    Like


  80. Lurker, I have a confession to make:

    I was that hooker last week. :O

    Like


  81. Today is a special day of Man Honor: it marks the hallowed, one-year anniversary of Mel Gibson’s declaration – hurling “sugar tits” as pre-arrest invective.

    Celebrate responsibly.

    Like


  82. Once upon a time, I had a girl over after meeting her the previous night and I could not remember her name for anything. Peculiarly, I remembered that the same as an alcohol but was not Brandy. But I could not remember it.

    So, I get out of bed, grab the Oxford New English dictionary and lock myself in the bathroom. I go through the Bs, line by line until I finally find it.

    Return to my bedroom to find her now awake.

    “How are you doing this morning, Ms. Burgundy?”

    Like


  83. she must have been black

    Like


  84. I haven’t read it, I will, I just don’t have the time now and I want to leave a question to see how you people can help me.
    Off topic:
    MALE LATE TEEN VIRGIN BETA CRYING FOR HELP:

    People, Roissy and the loyal commenters.

    How can one pose “naturally” in an exclusive club. That is, a club that’s cool and stuff but that’s a little above your league.

    I know some tricks. When I go to a club I like look calm, like I’m having some fun but not too much… I like to appear natural, being not affraid to touch unkown girls and always make eye contact with them and try to be the last to leave that eye contact.

    I also try to make it look to outsiders that my male friends will naturally come to me or that I don’t give a fuck if they’re not all arround me because sooner or later they will.

    When I have female friends, I always try to make look like I’m constantly between two and giving them a good time in order to show to the other unkown females that those girls are having a good time partly because they’re with me.
    The hotter the girl the more I make sure she’s not far from me for more than 100 seconds or so.

    Another trick is to be the one in the group to have cigarettes. I will then offer some to girls, it will provide some openers.

    But I hardly dance. And am usually very shy (alcohol can neutralise that).

    The thing is, imagine I go to a more exclusive club. I don’t knok what I should do to look natural and have a chance of… you know… practice some game…
    What should I do to pass as normal!? I’m afraid I will freeze like if I were a totem or that I will drink too much and behave shamefully.

    Help, anyone?

    Like


  85. Just laugh and say you’re sorry. Easier than making up a neg/lie.

    Like


  86. cptnapalm,

    LOL! How did you skip Ms. Beaujolais and fast forward to Ms. Burgundy?

    Like


  87. Firepower,

    Ewwwww!

    Like


  88. on July 28, 2009 at 12:55 pm The Snatch Whisperer

    Virgin @40,
    Apply what you’re already doing to new places. You might want to do some recon prior to going to gauge appropriate dress and get a feel for the audience but you’re already doing things that should help you meet girls. Maintain a confident frame.
    One thing though, don’t freely give out your smokes. Make them ask and when they do tell them , with a smile, that its slutty for women to smoke. Another trick is to ask for a light, then pocket the lighter and make small talk. If she catches you make light of it. If not, it gives you a reason to talk with her later on. Don’t just walk up and give it back but let her catch you using it.

    Like


  89. lol. Wasn’t this a Seinfeld episode?

    “I forgot her name. It rhymes with a piece fo female anatomy.”

    “Vulva?”

    Like


  90. Oh Mandy! XD, I know it couldn’t have been you; she wasn’t nearly as disease encrusted as you.

    Like


  91. Only now can I look back and realize what it is my natural friend did as a young man.
    At the time I couldn’t understand why he got so much pussy.

    I remember one time my friend and I were trying to mack two girls with the nice guy routine- then the natural comes up- and he goes
    “I fuck stripers and hookers”

    My other friend and I were like:

    What the FUCK!
    WHY DID YOU JUST FUCKING SAY THAT?

    WHAT THE FUCK!

    The girls were like who is that pig?

    We would excuse his behavior, and apologize for it- but then something strange would happen the girls wouldn’t stop talking about the natural- and he would he wind up hooking up with them- fucking them almost immediately and dumping them.

    Another time he rolls up to some high class pretty bitches- and he goes I just took a huge shit. I think my tightly whitish underwear’s are smeared- needless to say the girls gave him the requisite look of disgust- and then one of them proceeded to blow him later on that night.

    No lie- no exaggeration.

    We were tight- but I could never do the things he did- nor did I understand why they worked.

    His mother committed suicide when he was 12 or so- she put a gun to her head and pulled the trigger.

    This man fucked strippers, hookers, amateur no name models, and everything in-between.

    Like


  92. i wonder what happens when the G Manifesto mixes up the names of his suit tailors and custom shoemakers…

    Like


  93. “If I were a beta who only managed to date one woman per year and consequently obsessed over that one woman, I might do better at remembering your names.”

    Roissy, you have no idea.
    It happened to me to be thinking about THE girl.
    I haven’t saw her for some months.
    But, I would just call another girl by the name of THE girl some three times in less than one minute.

    T…Ana, what did you say? Oh come one Ta… Ana… .
    (after a while) You see T… … . You see Ana…

    The worst of all is when you’re with a girl who knows THE girl, and also knows that you haven’t seen each other for some time. And then she hears you calling her Ta… Laura.

    And then Laura will say. Oh you so love THE girl, it’s so cute you like THE girl.
    And me saying: No I don’t. Why do you say that. I just like some qualities in her that can’t be compared to other human being that I know, but I also like this given trait in you. I don’t like THE girl…

    Sad. Beta to the core.
    More Betaness: Today it makes 2 months that I have no contact whatsoever with THE 10. Only the counting of the days is Beta now imagine how one gets damaged by that. That’s Super-Beta.
    But I refuse to go DA! So much that I now find myself wanting to have sexual intercourse with the average seven. Some time ago an eight would have to seduce me (of course, they would never seduce me because they don’t care about such not good looking beta)

    Like


  94. Thank you for your reply Snatch Whisperer.
    I am not very demanding and as such when I give smokes to a girl all I want from her is a good vibe and some shit conversation. The kind of conversation that alouds you to reopen her if you see her the following week.

    And I just got fucking mad with an cute (an 8) fifteen or sixteen years old – younger than me – who just asked me cold for the cigarrete and then actively refused me to light it up for her. This took place in a disco. I was like “damn! How stupid I was in giving away that smoke”.

    The truth is that she was rather beautifull and, despite being “cold” – what turns me on nonetheless – she was making a rather strong eye contact. She fooled me. I was not expecting her to be that bitchy. She was the only one who used me in the smokes thing.

    —————————————————-

    Now more seriously, your advices were good but I also happen to realise that they won’t serve me very much.
    I’m still hoping to get more answers. What must one do in clubs that are out of his league; Too much exclusive clubs?

    Or how can I act normally without freeze or making a general bad image of myself.

    Like


  95. There really ought to be something like a “Best of” roissy’s post.

    This one would be in it.

    Like


  96. Sometimes I forget my own name.

    Like


  97. Or perhaps I should say, “Sometimes my own name is forgotten by me.”

    Or, for Arpargus: “Aliquando nominis mei obliviscor.”

    I wanted to use “obliviscor” as a passive deponent, but since it seems to be used only in poetry in such a way, I am not sure if that is proper for a blog entry.

    Like


  98. Yes, using a deponent verb in a passive sense can be tricky. Sometimes a deponent can also be used with passive meaning, but if that is strictly poetic in this case, I would suggest using a synonym that isn’t deponent for a blog entry. The only other word for “forget” I can think of is dedisco. Perhaps something like this would work: “Aliquando nomen mihi dediscitur a me.” The verb must be third person because the name is the subject, and that is another reason your attempt really reads active.

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  99. that I will drink too much and behave shamefully.

    Help, anyone?”””””””

    Drink too much and behave shamefully. But not like where you end up tied to the bed and batman comes out of the closet.

    Like


  100. @pa

    Roissy said: I will sometimes forget your names during our courtship.

    Pa jested – ” er… Mulva?”

    OMG – I’ve so missed reading here – that cracked me up! I’m sitting in a Starbucks catching up (on vacay) looking like I belong in a loony bin ear to ear grin – too funny!

    Like


  101. LR says in ALL seriousness: “Being shitty with names has nothing to do with my memory. ”

    OMG – I’m cracking up again – STOP!

    Like


  102. Once upon a time, I had a girl over after meeting her the previous night and I could not remember her name for anything. Peculiarly, I remembered that the same as an alcohol but was not Brandy. But I could not remember it.

    So, I get out of bed, grab the Oxford New English dictionary and lock myself in the bathroom. I go through the Bs, line by line until I finally find it.

    Return to my bedroom to find her now awake.

    “How are you doing this morning, Ms. Burgundy?”

    “How are you doing, Ms. … De Beer?”

    Like