Brush With Humanity

This short video was shot at a local German restaurant specializing in a delicious variety of sausages. The woman playing the piano struck me as incredibly ugly. Later, I discovered she was blind when a small child walked up and requested a song — she didn’t look at him but only cocked her ear in his direction and smiled. My lovely guests were emotionally moved.

Listen carefully to the video, particularly toward the end. You will hear her sing with a beautiful lilting voice. The incongruence reminded me of the power of contrast and pleasant surprises. You would do well to keep that lesson in mind in your interactions with women.





Comments


  1. a local German restaurant specializing in a delicious variety of sausages

    Is that the same thing as a nightclub which is a sausage party?

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  2. Women only continually surprise me in an unsought fashion. The more time I spend with them the more I only want them for my carnal needs.

    Less attractive women tend to have more personality and are more sociable tolerable.

    I am of course speaking in generalities.

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  3. on September 7, 2008 at 11:47 pm somebody from half sigma's blog

    i feel for this chick. when genetic engineering comes to fruition, we need to ameliorate the human condition by preventing unfortunate phenotypes like this from occurring. instead of pity, we can offer real solutions in the coming decades. quite a shame though. she seems to be making the best of it. people who are opposed to voluntary eugenics are not compassionate enough &/or not intelligent enough to understand this.

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  4. Hey, what happened to:

    “For what could be more cruel than knowingly bringing to life a soul trapped in a twisted body or a stunted mind, wracked with pain and shame and exposed to a lifetime of horrible torment as objects of his affection forever elude him, his heart never to pulse with requited romantic love. I have nothing but seething hatred for those parents who willingly allow the births of babies with torturous afflictions.” ?

    D&E, baby !

    Grzlickson, get some rubbing alcohol, a coat hanger and a wet/dry vac… and order a pizza while you’re at it – it’s gonna be a dooz…

    Oh wait, he said “his”… my bad. Carry on.

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  5. Is that david alexander’s chick?

    i kid, i kid

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  6. The more time I spend with them the more I only want them for my carnal needs.

    More accurately the more you only need them for your carnal needs. Sounds kinda needy to me.

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  7. Have I mentioned Roosh is the spawn of Satan?

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  8. BTW, roissy, where would you rate the piano girl on your 1-10 scale? Just curious. 🙂

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  9. Being very non mainstream myself, I always found it interesting that so many men have such a limited idea of what beauty is. Part of what beauty is, is being able to function well when the environmental and physical odds are stacked against one.

    Consider that babies are all born basically weak and physically twisted and ugly…and women in general are far physically weaker than men. I’d daresay that most women don’t touch the average man’s physical capability in areas other than mere strength either.

    Yet everyone with a soul (or whatever collection of impulses and thought patterns works as this) loves babies. Men are even evolved to be able to love damn near anybody’s offspring, including animals no sane woman would consider raising outside of a zoo….like rattlesnakes and such. Y’all can love all kinds of slithering, creepy crawly things…and for every hole on just about any beast that will sit still for a moment, there is a guy who wants to shag it. Lots of guys are even Gay.

    So it’s not so far fetched that a man, even a somewhat “shallow” one, can find beauty in a fat, blind, pianist. There are enough men who find big, fat hairy men with moustaches and tattoos of various legendary demons, to finance a thriving niche of porn.

    Some guys are in it for the status even when the lights are out (sexual betas) and some guys are in it for the experience (sexual alphas).

    What a guy prefers doesn’t really matter as much as whether or not he is shagging according to his own preferences or so that the leftover images of his high school in-crowd would pat him on the back if they were physically present and still that age.

    For the woman though, unless she doesn’t want male companionship, the question is going to be whether or not you can handle the idea of validating your own status rather than using a woman as a status accessory.

    “Ugly” women aren’t good status accessories unless you’re living the kind of life wherein you are truly free, and don’t need to parade her, or her looks/personality attractiveness are compatible with the wives of your peers.

    I have enjoyed being a big, strong woman since my teens. None of the “popular” girls could make me do or not do anything or anyone I wanted. So I suppose I learned lessons about beauty early on that prevented my confidence being entirely dependent on how I looked.

    If I did rely solely on conformity to the mainstream standard for my beauty, I’d be an ugly fool. I’d much rather be an ugly genius.

    …and truthfully I would rather bear a blind, deaf superhumanly intelligent person than a physically “perfect” dunce.

    Stuff happens. You can cope with life or you can’t. If you’ve made your best “eugenic” shot, things can still go wrong. So best is to learn to deal with adversity rather than to formulate potentially self-f*cking plans to escape it.

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  10. I always found it interesting that so many men have such a limited idea of what beauty is. Part of what beauty is, is being able to function well when the environmental and physical odds are stacked against one.

    That’s called “character”, not “beauty.”

    Is it so wrong to want someone who has both character *and* beauty? (As an economics geek, I am immediately tempted to draw indifference curves with character and beauty as the axes, but I’ll spare you.)

    The longer-term a relationship, the more I would weight character relative to beauty. That doesn’t mean I am willing to forgo beauty altogether.

    And surely you don’t believe that male pursuit of beautiful women is pure status-seeking — just wanting to show off to other men and/or women? There is obviously a status-seeking element to it, but perhaps men actually *like* the company (sexual or otherwise) of beautiful women for its own sake.

    On a related note, when I rate female beauty, 1-5’s are largely going to be women who are overweight or obese, while 6-10’s are largely women who are not and are perhaps even physically fit. There is crossover, obviously, but it’s the exception rather than the rule. (And sadly, I am probably being generous with current American obesity rates by having the crossover point be at 5/6. I assume that we rate on a curve rather than an absolute scale, so 1-5’s are necessarily the bottom 50% and 6-10 are necessarily the top 50%.)

    As someone who has put a lot of effort into improving my own physical fitness — both losing weight and improving my strength and endurance — I also happen to believe that physical fitness is a sign of character and discipline. It takes discipline to eat healty. It takes discipline to work out. This discipline builds character. When I see an obese woman, I don’t just think “yuck, that fat chick is ugly,” I also think, “why would I want to spend time with a woman who evidently can’t keep her hands away from a bag of Doritos, and who probably hasn’t seen the inside of a gym in years?”

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  11. @Zorgon, physical evidence of survival capability and strength is beautiful. If it weren’t, then women would almost universally prefer men with little to no muscle tone.

    Large and/or well defined muscles are evidence of repeated trauma, as is good skin, sturdy femurs and feet, nice teeth…almost all that is beautiful about any mammal above the age of one month, is a result of having survived something that would have killed them were they ever so slightly weaker.

    So as an individual, you may prefer that your partners not have endured what some people have, but for others it may be an extreme turn on for someone to be obviously functioning well and yet disabled in some way.

    Even being model slim is evidence of someone in the crux of surviving near starvation conditions. So unlike most fat chicks, being aware of what beauty is, I don’t actually fault someone for preferring slim women if that is truly their own preference, and the social issues don’t matter as much as his pleasure. If it’s a status thing then well, next couple decades when lazy people convince the sheeple that looking like a blob is better, the herd will follow along with that too.

    When you see a fat person, you shouldn’t make assumptions about how they got that way without really checking them out, for the same reasons you shouldn’t make assumptions about how someone got or stays within a normal to reasonably low bodyfat.

    I was late diagnosed hypothyroid, and had to crawl my way back from barely having energy for my blood to circulate. So tell me about healthy and discipline when you’ve actually had to fight for yours. When you get what ought to be a permanent condition, and cure yourself, you’ll be thankful to have done it, and much less judgmental of other who may just be trying to get by just like you are.

    Within reasonable constraints, health can’t be measured in pounds, and for some people, being fat is the lesser of evils. Just because you don’t like it doesn’t mean that nobody should. For once, I wish I could discuss this with someone who prefers slender women but doesn’t judge others as somehow defective for not conforming to their personal whims that have squat to do with science.

    Get this through your thick beta skull: Nobody is obligated to be what you prefer.

    Nobody is forcing you to shag fat chicks. Nobody’s forcing you personally to think that we’re beautiful.

    So this discussion really doesn’t concern you unless your objective is to attempt to place a moral value on what others find attractive. If you are, then well…you’re fighting against nature, and nature will always win. Not everybody will or should like the same thing.

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  12. on September 8, 2008 at 1:31 pm Usually Lurking

    …I wish I could discuss this with someone who prefers slender women but doesn’t judge others as somehow defective for not conforming to their personal whims that have squat to do with science.

    We naturally think less of fat people, especially fat women. This does not need to be celebrated or denigrated, but it is true. It si natural. And nature will always win.

    People, nowadays, are especially critical of overweight people because they are one of the few, seemingly, available “targets”. (Most other “targets” of our derision being now forbiden because of Political Correctness. And people, like BfdBlog and others, are working hard to make any anti-fat thoughts crimethink.)

    Once, the fat-cats were criticized because they were the upper class. Now, it is possible for almost everyone to get fat if they want to. And that fat is then seen as a weakness by those that are not. My former roomate used to say all sorts of things about fat people and was absolutely shocked to find out that I was a very fat child and teenager (I was in much better shape then he was when he made these comments).

    So, now: Fat = Personal Choice.

    Regardless of how accurate this is, it is going to stick. And it should stick, because even though someone who is slightly overweight can be very healthy, obesity never is.

    And if someone does have a screwed up Thyroid, well, why did we not have these before? Is it because of how much Soy we get in our diets? A lot of evidence is pointing to just that.

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  13. on September 8, 2008 at 1:32 pm Usually Lurking

    The other thing that I should have added is that one of the reasons why this subject has become more heated is that the grand majority of men prefer women who are not fat. And the majority of women (and men) are now fat.

    Supply and Demand…it is a bitch.

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  14. There are still some countries where women know that they need to stay slim to keep a man. Just get out of the US with its endless supply of disgusting big-mouthed fatass women who are large and in-charge and life becomes so much better.

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  15. the more deep she tries to convince you she is, the more shallow her values. the more “independent” she claims to be, the more she will end up being codependant and needy. the more she “doesn’t care about marriage” the sooner she will be planning one with you. women are the most serious reverse psychology panderers I know.

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  16. wonder what the percentage of chicks with fat faces that aren’t fat beneath the neck is……? hmmm. 🙂

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  17. Dear Roissy, is it possible to share the name of the restaurant? Sausages are one of Pupu’s favorite foods!

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  18. certainly, pupu. the name of the restaurant is Old Europe.

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  19. Thank you, Roissy! Muah!

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  20. @The weak:

    I would argue with you more about this, but I understand that there is no way to raise someone’s inborn potential.

    Strong people survive and thrive. Weak people worry about petty things that don’t matter to anyone but other weak people.

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  21. on September 8, 2008 at 7:32 pm Usually Lurking

    Nicole, who are you talking to?

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  22. @Lurking, you each know who you are. I don’t, and I don’t like to get too deeply into debate about subjective values.

    This is one of those topics that healers can have, and it can be lively without degrading into personal attacks and uneducated outbursts implying what someone else should or shouldn’t prefer or be disgusted by, based on a personal, uneducated opinion.

    I can explain why someone would be attracted to something that disgusted someone else, so long as it stays civil…but it doesn’t always, and you might be creeped out to know this, but I’ve actually been cyberstalked for basically just being rational about fatness. Bizarre, but true.

    So I know how invested some people become in their own presumed superiority. Some arguments are worth having, but arguments about people’s worth aren’t beyond reminding people that there’s more to a person than a single physical feature.

    If someone is too dumb to figure that out, and too presumptuous to avoid attempting to socially enforce their personal preference or even worse, the mainstream uniform on others, they kinda deserve their misery. If they feel offended every time someone doesn’t conform to their aesthetic preferences, then they inflict misery on themselves that could be avoided simply by adopting the same attitude I have about idiots.

    As long as they’re not in my way, I’m happy to let all the “lemmings” jump off whatever cliff they choose. It’ll just make more room for me and my ample rump…and those of my healthy, happy offspring. 🙂

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  23. on September 8, 2008 at 8:37 pm Usually Lurking

    Yes, Nicole, anyone that isn’t attracted to fat people are lemmings. I know, I know, that is not what you said…but, it was the implication.

    And, BTW, the mainstream is fat. It really is. However, they simply do not get much TV time because most people are simply not attracted to fat people, even when they themselves are fat.

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  24. there’s more to a person than a single physical feature

    Never said that there wasn’t.

    But to think that obesity doesn’t detract from a woman’s beauty — well, that’s just hogwash.

    As far as character goes: yes, there are people who have legitimate medical conditions that make it difficult for them to manage their weight. But “difficult” is not “impossible.”

    For example, I am probably at least a borderline case of Asperger’s. Math and computers, not social interaction, were always my strong suit as a kid. Nor was I ever an athletic kid — I was generally in the bottom 10% of my age group as far as any measure of physical fitness goes.

    Yet, today, you don’t see me whining about how “wahhh, my life sucks because I had all these problems as a kid.” Now, I’m certainly in at least the top 10-20% for physical fitness, I’m much more social, and I’m even starting to become increasingly fearless at approaching women.

    When we face challenges in life, we can either whine and complain and cry about how things suck, or we can take responsibility, work to overcome our challenges, and move forward with our lives. That, to me, is character.

    Sorry, but the average obese American who sits on their ass watching TV and eating unhealthy snack foods is *not* displaying character. Why would I want to spend my life with such a woman if instead I could find someone who believes in living a healthier lifestyle?

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  25. @Lurking, since you failed to understand the first time I said it, I’ll say it again in simpler language:

    Point 1: I could give a flying fuck what you or anyone like you is attracted to or disgusted by, be that fatness, Blackness, or whatever. You’re just a tool. Refer to the next point.

    Point 2: This mainstream that you cling to for support is a stream of piss, courtesy of people with similar capabilities as myself, but with less remorse about convincing you sheeple to destroy yourselves faster, or remain oblivious to our efforts to fleece your pockets.

    The only difference between me and an advertising executive is that they need more money to feel okay about themselves than I do.

    I understand the business and how it works. So rather than sell out and sell diets to you people, I chose to go in the direction of affirming beauty rather than destroying it for my profit. Lucky me, there’s quite a bit left for me to profit from doing the right thing with my talents.

    …or at least what I feel is the right thing. Every time this topic rears its botox injected bobble head, I feel increasingly less benevolent, and tempted to make a calendar of waifs who actually do heroin.

    Point 3: All the posturing you do here, and whatever pathetic insults you may spew, do not take one red cent from my bank account, or cause one less man or woman to want to get into my pants.

    Point 5: I am not jealous of Barbie type women or the attention that they get…and when I say Barbie, I don’t mean merely slim. Slimness is irrelevant in this to me. It’s the ass licking of Big Brother telling you to purposefully starve yourselves so that his cronies can save money by convincing you that you’re healthier than you are on the one hand, and make money by convincing you that you’re sicker than you are on the other.

    I can’t be attracted to people I pity, and that’s at least 80% of most people in the western world.

    I only have one vagina and one womb, and if you please I’d like to reserve that for someone who is strong and worthy. I don’t need you to tell me what I should like or what I should be like. I just need people like you to stay out of my way.

    Can you do that, or are you going to go the same way as others who’ve tried to “put me in my place” with inferior reasoning skills?

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  26. @Zorgon, you seem to be having similar reading comprehension problems to Lurking.

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  27. 25 Nicole:

    Hit a nerve?

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  28. Nicole, this isn’t about you. You can like and dislike whoever you damn well please. That’s fine. Good for you. Doesn’t affect me.

    Also, my view that obesity is a sign of a character deficiency doesn’t just apply to women. I make the same judgment of obese men.

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  29. on September 8, 2008 at 9:39 pm Usually Lurking

    I could give a flying fuck what you or anyone like you is attracted to or disgusted by, be that fatness, Blackness, or whatever. You’re just a tool.

    Haha. Jeez, here I thought that my comment at #12 was quite reasonable and even handed.

    Why is the opposite of Obesity advertised diets and waifs who actually do heroin?

    whatever pathetic insults you may spew

    I am curious, when did I spew an insult.

    Also, you missed point 4.

    Who is starving themselves? I eat Butter with impunity.

    I don’t need you to tell me what I should like or what I should be like

    I never told you, or anyone else, who or what they should like. I did say that most people are not attracted to fat people. This is a simple and obvious fact.

    When did I ever try to put you in your place? You should live however you want and eat whatever you want. And I will continue to make a very simply point point, fat people are unattractive to most…and that pisses them off.

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  30. @Tupac, yes. I said I’ve been cyberstalked over this kind of thing.

    If you have any idea how horribly stupid that was, you’ll understand why this sort of thing makes my inner wolf growl.

    If I’d said this at the beginning of that whole fiasco, instead of caring to debate the issues as if I was speaking to equals, none of that would have gotten as out of hand as it did.

    They are pathetic, and need to be reminded whenever they step up.

    This is, after all, a place where betas are supposed to learn to behave more like Alphas, right?

    If you want women to like you more, you should at least pretend not to be pathetic.

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  31. @Lurking, play passive aggressive semantic games with your mom. Not with me.

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  32. Hmmm…maybe I should put this another way that’s even easier for plebians to understand:

    Alphas who can discuss weight:
    Martial arts instructors
    Athletic team coaches
    Yoga and Pilates instructors
    Dance instructors
    Bodybuilders
    Strength athletes

    All these guys actually know something about fitness, and don’t treat weight as some kind of monster that grows in a social/nutritional/athletic/environmental vacuum.

    Betas who can’t discuss weight:
    Runners
    Bike riders
    Any other aerobics inclined guys
    Non athletes

    These guys at the non professional level are usually either thin and weak as a result of their normal activity, or obsessive to the point of being hostile about it…in other words Gay.

    The more you obsess over fashion, weight, and like issues that don’t have directly to do with beauty as in symmetry and function, the more a woman’s inner voice is telling her that you’re a butt pirate. If you manage to get in, and confirm that by actually trying to do her in the butt, she will be sure that you are Gay as the springtime.

    It’s one thing to not enjoy people who let themselves go, don’t have any personal pride, and are eating their way to an early grave, but it’s another to actually harp on it to the point that people notice you above the average guy.

    Got it?

    The idea is to not single yourself out as particularly Gayer than the average guy who, as I’ve mentioned before, can love a pit bull, and generally has no problem banging a technically fat chick.

    These statistics that you overenthusiastic guys use to justify yourselves are totally unnecessary, and skewed since almost any of you would do someone who is technically overweight. It doesn’t take much to be that.

    When you bang that drum again and again it says you’re a substandard pussy who needs a woman to be rail thin to be a suitable status accessory for you, which may not actually be true.

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  33. Anyone else think Nicole is probably a deuce, deuce and a half?

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  34. Anyone else think Nicole is probably a deuce, deuce and a half?

    yes.
    nicole, please change your avatar to an attractive woman. or even just a plain woman. it’s disturbing and ruining the aesthetics of my front page.

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  35. Jeepster, actually I am a bit shy of 200 lbs, but the only soft places on my body are my boobs and my belly…and the boobs are huge. The belly is…”momly”.

    I’m one of those scary women who can pick up a 250 lbs. guy and slam him on the pavement if he gets out of line.

    …and this is why I’ve probably had more pussy than most guys crying openly about teh evll fat chicks.

    I don’t advocate myself or women like me as what everyone should view as ideal. We are freaks, er um, special, and this is a good thing for humanity. What I’m saying is that people shouldn’t assume that fat = unhealthy or defective and then get loud about it in public.

    Aside of making yourself look Gay, you can get yourself physically humiliated if it goes too far.

    Almost all female bodybuilders, strength athletes, wrestlers, and the like, are fat chicks with their clothes on, and in the off season.

    If you were in a burning building, you would hope that whatever female firefighters were there working to get you out, didn’t get by on affirmative action.

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  36. @Roissy, I don’t stay where I’m not welcome.

    “May you live forever.” 🙂

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  37. Why can’t it be that easy with dizzy?

    (This comment exists solely to help purge the front page. Let the healing begin.)

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  38. So that’s what you need to have a “brush with humanity”? Man, that’s sad.

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  39. 36 Nicole:

    Sorry to see you go, toots. But you did cross the line the moment you elevated propaganda over perspicacity.

    Don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya.

    No beast so fierce but knows some touch of pity. But I know none, and therefore am no beast. — Richard III

    TC

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  40. on September 8, 2008 at 11:16 pm anonymous reader

    Roissy, is there a WordPress plugin where you can get comments by certain users to not appear? I’m getting sick of Nicole’s foolishness (OMG, even though I’m obese and unhealthy, I’m just as hot as Scarlet Johannesen!!!!). Barring that, could you limit her to 5 posts or something? I hate having to even scroll past her comments, she is polluting the quality of the comments on this site. Thanks.

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  41. It just occurred to me what a great match DA and Nicole would be.

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  42. interesting thread. nicole is clearly smart and original. i like her way of dealing with the fact that she doesn’t conform to the standard of physical beauty. “usually lurking” states the obvious when saying that “most people are simply not attracted to fat people”. i for one certainly find skinny women hot. but when i ask myself who gets laid more, lurking or nicole, i have to say, i’m not so sure. nicole is right that there’s a man for every hole that needs to be plugged. i appreciate the no-nonsense attitude in lurking’s and zorgon’s responses. but i wonder about the origin of their need to rub in the obvious and push back against nicole’s nonconformist response to not conforming to the standard of physical beauty. perhaps they have some issues of their own and responded by training themselves to conform — thus the allergic reaction against nicole’s opposite approach.

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  43. I too have been following the thread, NK. I don’t know Nicole, and it would seem that I may never get to know her by the looks of things, but I personally dont have any problem with her from what she describes. It is common for West African men, for example, to prefer a woman of her dimensions.

    If there is one problem I have with this site at all, its he incredibly narrow range of expression with regard to things such as beauty. Like Nicole, I am not saying in the least that the other fellas here have to like her or like what I like, etc. But to constantly put it down does make one raise an eyebrow. Personally, the kinds of women that Roissy and some others don’t do anythi for me, because I like a woman with a demonstrable display of T&A and so on. Not only that, but Nicole’s point about “function” is important, too; many of the kinds of gals that turn Roissy and other’s heads, I’d hurt in the sack. Gals near a Nicole are built for industrial strength, heavy duty lovin’, LOL.

    Anyway, yea, I do agree with the point of Roissy’s post here; being gracious to the unfortunateis something we all need to keep in mind.

    Salaam
    Mu

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  44. […] this time.” The idea here is to draw a contrast between your words and your actions. (Contrast is king!) You are verbally expressing pleasure but nonverbally pulling back as if you were the […]

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  45. […] who elicits the same reaction from an audience expecting something entirely different. Or this blind lady I saw in a restaurant, who played the piano and sang with a beautiful voice I wasn’t expecting from someone who […]

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