Teasing Should Be Like Breathing

My girl had challenged me to a pushup hold contest. This is where you assume the pushup position and hold it there for as long as you can. I had said she stood no chance with me, and she eagerly set out to prove me wrong. But instead of following the script she was expecting, I reached out and swatted her inner elbow while she was in her pushup, and she crumpled to the ground, whining about my unfairness as I declared “victory” over her puny femaleness. She then chased me around the house until I tossed her onto the bed where intimacy commenced.

When a girl asks you to do something for or with her, instead of following her request to the tee you should be thinking how you can screw around with her expectation. Your brain needs to be trained to think like this if you are a natural born beta who did not instill in himself the proper mindset when it is best instilled — elementary school. Years of pulling ponytails on playgrounds prepares a boy for dealing with adult women who want to be dominated and teased into arousal by a carefree man who doesn’t take them seriously. Call it “depedestalization”; the act of teasing is akin to pushing a girl right off her pedestal, whether erected by herself or by orbiting obsequious men, and is craved by every woman with a working vagina.

Remember, because the average woman is biologically more valuable than the average man, every girl is born perched atop a pedestal. The doctor holds it upside down, gives it a few slaps to firm the supports, and then inserts it under the infant girl’s bottom, where it remains propping her up until she is knocked off it by either circumstance, aging, or deliberate effort. If the infant girl grows up ugly, her pedestal will shrink of its own accord, until it is not more than a speck on her ass. If she grows up pretty, her pedestal will get bigger in accordance with the slavish attention she receives from men. By age 18, a hot chick may as well be surveying her queefdom from the apex of a pyramid. It would take a truly impressive asshole to knock such a girl off her throne, which may explain why the hottest girls fall for the biggest jerks.

Therefore, teasing a girl should be like breathing to you. It should come naturally, with little forethought. For instance, if she asks you to pick up a bag of kitty litter for her furry child substitute, rather than dutifully fulfilling her request you could pretend to forget to buy it and inform her that you bought an electric zapper instead to train the cat to go in the toilet. Then pull out a black wand or something similar and chase after the cat to “demonstrate” the efficacy of electroshock kitty training. If you can do this with a straight face, she will freak out. Once informed of the prank, she will smile, hit you hard, and then jump your bones.

Or maybe she gets excited to tell you about something that happened to her at work. If you’re a beta, you would ask her to proceed and listen intently as she unloads her emotions. She will be grateful for your listening ability, but not too turned on. However, if you’re an alpha, you would prop your hands under your chin, curl your fingers, purse your lips into a pinched smile, widen your eyes while blinking exaggeratedly for effect and arch your eyebrows like you’re about to burst from the anticipation. Clap your hands like a little boy catching his first glimpse of a birthday present, and say “Do go on! Yes? Yes!?! Oh, the suspense is killing me! I hope it lasts!” If her eyes aren’t shimmering with joy and lust by this point, you are dating a golem. Naturally, she will give you shit. This just means you’re doing it right.

I know this blog has an inordinate number of aspie readers who can’t divine subtleties of argument, so before the usual complaints are heard it pays to remind yourself that while women love to get teased, their appreciation doesn’t mean you should tease them ALL THE FUCKING TIME, regardless of circumstance. If she wants you to pick up flowers for her mom’s funeral, it’s probably not a good idea to tease her about her allergies to roses. You can occasionally pick up a gallon of milk for her without making a production out of it. I really hate having to include these obvious caveats, but man oh man alive there are some numbskulls on this board.





Comments


  1. That actually comes off as pretty fun…it’s true. We love teasing. It’s attention!

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  2. on October 26, 2010 at 10:45 am JamalLeroyJenkinsXIV

    Agree with the last portion, use teases sparingly. If you tease constantly, you because the Beta Little Brother. Constantly being a jerk is a surefire way to send your females into the arms of a more “Mature” Alpha.

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  3. Absolutely good advice. Joking and teasing is a big part of being the type of guy that’s fun to be around. I don’t think that it’s too much to include that caveat. In fact, from what I’ve seen and experienced, the nuance of when to be funny and when to be serious is the stumbling block here. Seen many a goal line fumble over some ill timed trolling.

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  4. some girls love to dish out the teasing as well. it actually makes the relationship fun

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  5. Any type of physical teasing where there’s laughter and physicality involved can lead into a viciously gnawing makeout session. This is why tickling and wrestling always leads to hookups. Always.

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  6. It’s low-grade asshole game. Nice guys think the guy teasing is a jerk.

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  7. “Oh, the suspense is killing me! I hope it lasts!”

    Nice Willy Wonka tie-in. I like.

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  8. That’s good you have a pull-up bar in your house. We used to have one in the basement and my brothers would always do a few pull-ups every time they went down there.

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  9. on October 26, 2010 at 11:25 am Ascending Alpha

    Its funny looking back I now understand why in Highschool all the nicest sweetest hot girls always went out with all the biggest jerks. Where were you 8 years ago Roissy?

    Well at least now I am getting pretty good at this.

    PS when a girls father just lost his job is another time not to tease.

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  10. Queefdom shoulda had a (heh) after it.

    Great stuff.

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  11. Count me in as one of those “aspies” (though I’m not sure if I have Asperger’s or not). It took me a LOOONG fucking time to figure this out, and undo the programming that said that only “immature” people do this.

    I was raised to be this wallflower at school who always did the right thing and didn’t do what the “misbehaving” boys did. And guess what? I’m almost out of college and a virgin.

    I’m finally starting to realize what it takes to attract women, and how I can’t be this wallflower who’s a really good listener. Really that shit describes me to a T. Women telling you you’re a “good listener” while they fuck bad boys should almost be considered and insult. It’s definitely an indicator that you need to get your shit together.

    This post is a good description of what game basically is. And people like me are testament to what happens when you don’t have a good enough male role model and overly influential female presence in the household.

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  12. Came across a new shit-test this weekend.

    “I can’t believe you haven’t made out with me yet.”

    Real-time answer: “You need to charm me, first.”

    Other possibilities:
    “I like to build the suspense.”
    “Worried I won’t?”
    “I kinda had my eyes on your friend” (only if the friend is obviously less attractive)

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  13. In order for teasing to be effective, the teasee has to have a minimal baseline of intelligence – even rudimentary perception. The smarter the vag, the better teasing works on it.

    As a category, females have slid so far down the smartness scale that teasing has developed substantially more social risks than even imaginable a few short years ago.

    The Western World has degenerated into an episode of Jersey Shore where Snooki watches Idiocracy to, like, grasp the subtext, yo.

    A swingin’ bachelor once could really, actually find hot girls who were also smart, but now, those are as rare as Great Auks.

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  14. When I went on instinct, I used to be pretty decent at this. Then I started overanalyzing myself and became too nice. Now, I’m trying to reset my mind, hoping too much damage hasn’t already been done.

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  15. Yet another reason to expat: you can tease when you like, PLUS when you are actually willing to listen to her tedious tales of who said what to whom during her lunch break, you can insist that while you’re happy to speak her language, it’s still not your native one, and could she please be concise and not ramble on when telling these stories? Listening to a foreign language for long stretches is mentally exhausting, you know.

    Of course, what’s mentally exhausting is listening to long-winded meandering female pablum. But the language “gap” does a great job of making your desires palatable.

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  16. “Teasing Should Be Like Breathing”

    Ummm. More like eating. Yes, teasing should be second nature, but you need to watch when, where, how, and how often you do it… otherwise it will not have positive results.

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  17. Waaaah! sob!! (mewl!) another Game post. Yawn. stick to politics!

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  18. @ Cauthon

    Came across a new shit-test this weekend.

    “I can’t believe you haven’t made out with me yet.”

    Real-time answer: “You need to charm me, first.”

    “How much money you got with ya” is my go to line for such things.

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  19. “because the average woman is biologically more valuable than the average man,”

    well, why are most infanticides women? why in china they have an excess of men not of women?

    I do think your argument holds value when a women is 20 and the guy is 20 but when the guy is 40 and the women is 40, tables are pretty much turned…

    perhaps what you meant is that an alpha should CHALLENGE the assumption that women are biologically more valuable than him as he has the most in demand penis.

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  20. A very sweet post. It’s all about the correct mix of light & dark. Nice to see the importance of subtlety being recognised.

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  21. on October 26, 2010 at 12:47 pm Frisky Business

    Glad to see you’re working out your core with high plank! Now challenge her to a tractor tire flipping contest. 1..2..3.. GO!

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  22. Of course this all goes without saying, so thanks for saying it.

    Tease your woman. Don’t do what she expects.

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  23. How can you change yourself to be able to do this?

    I kind of have a feeling I don’t have much hope left for these things. I’m 29 years old I can’t do this, for myriad of reason, at all. I can’t tease women at all, I can’t do the joking banter with men that most other men can do instinctually. I automatically take everything at face value and it affects the way people behave around me. Its like they can’t relax at all and they have to act really serious around me.

    Even though I can observe other people doing this I, for some reason, can’t replicate that kind of behavior.

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  24. queserasera —

    The key qualifier here is “biologically.”

    China’s a case where massive overpopulation has altered the equation, such that male children are preferred because they help the family out not through guaranteed grandchildren, but through work. Chinese who immigrate to the west don’t carry the same strong gender preference.

    In a situation where famine, disease, and war severely threatened populations — that is, most of human history — a girl’s sheer reproductive value was a genetic lineage’s insurance policy.

    Though an extremely successful male child can eventually father thousands of heirs, most won’t. Many won’t have any at all. But its almost guaranteed that a woman will have at least one child, and very likely that she’ll have multiple children. And in those ancestral environments, playing the odds was smart.

    As roissy noted, few women = population bottleneck. China’s problem is its population and the policies design to mitigate it have amplified the desire of parents to have their one or two children to be male.

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  25. @sdaedalus: A very sweet post. It’s all about the correct mix of light & dark. Nice to see the importance of subtlety being recognised.

    Game is all about subtlety. It’s an art not a science, which is why so few guys can pull it off as well as the true masters of the Dark Arts.

    This is also why Roissy put that caveat at the bottom of the post, although it might have been more amusing not to put it there and watch the ensuing mayhem. Come to think of it, the mayhem will come, but about 100 posts later than normal.

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  26. Ya gotta tease girls in the same way you would a 12 year old, in my opinion. Girls are a lot dumber than they were 5-10 years ago so a lot of the stuff an intelligent man may use as teasing material may fly right over their heads and all you’ll get is a dumbfounded, blank, expressionless stare. You’ll essentially be cock-blocking yourself unless you realize just how dense they are these days. If you can, try to incorporate Miley Cyrus or Justin Beiber or vampires into your routine.

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  27. on October 26, 2010 at 1:03 pm (R)Evolutionary

    Great post. I love the reference to childhood teasing. I was a natural at this–pulling pony tails, pinching, slapping asses, verbal teasing, up to somewhere junior high. Then somehow the beta pedestalization social program kicked in, and I became fearful of teasing girls I really liked. Of course i still teased the ones I wasn’t atttracted to, and of course those were the girls who liked me back. Reading CR and studing game in general has been a return to myself, and I actually feel myself inhabiting an innocent, fun, yet alpha comportment that has been absent for a couple of decades. It’s liberating, and joyful, empowering and fun. I see it as a Taoist expression of timeless youth.

    One niggling caveat that there’s an important and natural place for teasing, but teasing can grow into sarcasm over time. In fact there’s a subtle crossover, some sarcasm is teasing, and some teasing is sarcasm.

    I agree with CR, that sarcasm is a poor substitute for witty repartee and is a sign of a damaged woman, is not feminine, and is generally irritating to be around a heavily sarcastic woman for more than about 15 minutes.

    So I would caution men to avoid the more sarcastic forms of teasing, and to be careful not to encourage or reward sarcastic behavior in in your wimmins. So tease them about being sarcastic. Perfecto.

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  28. I wonder if gay guys read this blog and sigh and wish THEY could be properly rogered by Roissy? They must,right? Read a column like Savage Love,lots of gays write in saying they need a straight guy to abuse ’em. Kind of a disgusting thought,so..I’ll move on.

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  29. I have no problem with the teasing but I have tremendous empathy for guys who can’t quite figure out the right formula for a good tease at the right time.

    For those guys, it must be exhausting to always be monitoring social interactions and analyzing when the right tease should come into play.

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  30. Let me insert on more warning: if your girl grew up in an abusive household, or was subjected to bullying in school, there is no effin’ way your advice will work.

    It’ll be easy to find out which way she goes the first time you try this. Consider that a warning. If she bursts into tears instead of jumping your bones; if she gives you the glare that reminds her of having her hair pulled in the hallway, or the books knocked out of her hands, the reminder that nobody wanted her, nobody cared, then don’t. Do. It. Again.

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  31. Is Bill a girl?

    It’s been beaten to death here that teasing and negging is scaled to the girl’s self esteem and comfort levels. Done right, every girl enjoys teasing.

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  32. Good post.
    While I respect the epic scope analysis of global & national culture, society, history, etc which is offered here more & more in recent months,
    posts like this one about teasing give me more value.

    They put a smile on my face and give me info (or reminders) which I can apply profitably today & tomorrow,
    making a definite positive impact on my life now,
    rather than that other info, which is sometimes fascinating, but sometimes too much additional info to process in a busy day (something like stumbling into the midst of a college course in progress), and often depressing, rather pointlessly depressing in my case, as I am not in a position to apply it to my life in any big way.
    There’s never a shortage of depressing info available, but info that is actually helpful, entertaining, and boosts my spirits, is a lot less common.

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  33. on October 26, 2010 at 1:14 pm The Rational Male

    I get my fair share of tail but I’m always looking to improve my social skills, especially with the opposite sex. My latest goal is to get to the point where I tease ALL women like I do my young nieces.

    And the funny thing is that I DO treat two of them that way almost all of the time. One is an ex fuck buddy who I still hang out with and the other is a female friend I messed around with in the past. You could say that I rejected them as relationship material and as such the sexual tension is still there, but since I have little desire to have sex with them, it translates to me just not giving a shit so I treat them like bratty little girls.

    I need to make a more conscious effort to apply this same attitude to women who I AM trying to sex. Teasing accomplishes so many things. It is especially effective in allowing you to bulldoze over shit tests. After all, if you train yourself to only take women seriously when it is important to do so, you will rarely get caught with one of those “sneaky fucker” compliance shit tests that women throw out so often.

    Gonna try this with a new chick that’s coming over tomorrow. I managed to set the hook by throwing out a disqualifier and she ate that up. I cut out early which left her without a solid grasp of my personality and certainly wanting to find out more. She’s a blank slate with little preconception of me so this will be good practice.

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  34. Since this post opened with a sequence on push-ups, I don’t think I’ll be hijacking the thread with this. Today is my abs isolation day at the gym. I want to do something different than usual but it needs to burn like a muthafukka afterwards. Any suggestions?

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  35. PA,

    Bill has a good point.

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  36. Or you could say you’re an orbiter looking to dredge up old feelings rather than moving on.

    Don’t worry, firepower doesn’t get any, either.

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  37. PA,
    you ask for a good way to work your abs, so you might try this:
    lie down on your back, lift your legs about six inches,
    and lift your upper body a few inches, like doing ‘crunches’, so you are balancing on your butt.
    Hold a 10 lb weight behind your neck, and hold another 10 lb weight on your ankles (could use two 5 lb ankle weights).
    Hold the position for 60 seconds or longer.
    This is a sustained, intense, full contraction, so it is very efficient; maximum exercise in minimal time.

    As for how much burn you will feel afterwards, I guess that depends on what condition you’re in now.
    If my weighted leg lift exercise is too easy for you, you could always just see how long you could hold the position — two minutes? three minutes? etc.

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  38. PA

    Since this post opened with a sequence on push-ups, I don’t think I’ll be hijacking the thread with this. Today is my abs isolation day at the gym. I want to do something different than usual but it needs to burn like a muthafukka afterwards. Any suggestions?

    first remove
    that size 8
    buttplug

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  39. “what,’ no he (?) does not. I’ve posted an anecdote of a superalpha trainer at my gym before. When he has a hot, arrogant girl-customer, he nuclear-negs her, though of course within bounds of their professional relationship. When he has a middle-aged or chubby, or shy-looking customer, he goes very gentle with her, but still teases her.

    In both cases, the girls really like working with him. There are several very good trainers at my gym, but I’ve seen this guys’ schedule. His wait-list is long, and mostly female.

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  40. Lazy guy, thanks. I’m late-thirtyish and in excellent shape with very low BMI, though I’ve found myself struggling with core isolation excercises in a “core class” I went to one time. Good suggestion.

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  41. GBFM hasn’t been around for a while. Tucker Max rhymes with Goldman Sax must have ratted GBFM out to teh Fedz

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  42. “I know this blog has an inordinate number of aspie readers who can’t divine subtleties of argument”

    Nah, the female readers trump the aspies for lack of comprehension and annoyance.

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  43. on October 26, 2010 at 2:06 pm Frisky Business

    PA- Russian twists.

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  44. PA, turkish get-ups

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  45. on October 26, 2010 at 2:10 pm David Rockefeller

    I like that Roissy is acknowledging that this board attracts an amazing number of readers who suffer from Asperger’s.

    Like PA who uses a post about teasing girls as opportunity to solicit advice about his gym workout.

    Jesus, PA, can you not let yourself get distracted by crap? Focus, dude, focus.

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  46. i’m partial to
    Rumanian skanks

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  47. its sweet to see a select few elevate the chateaux topic from the fine points of psych game, to that ever-relevent topic of Roman Chair vs Ab-Shaker

    i can NOT wait for the gallstones discussion

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  48. <<<>>>

    ROFL

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  49. The biggest crush I have ever had was towards a friend’s husband (in my defense, I knew and befriended the husband first) that I met in college. He was over six feet tall, a Turkish-German grad student with blue eyes, and a lovely smile. But what really drew me to him was the way he would speak to me. He would tease me, not too much (as I am very sensitive), but enough to leave me wanting more. We were part of a Muslim group at my college and he would tease other girls in the group as well (which made me jealous, but that’s another story); but I later found out that all the girls he teased were seriously attracted to him as well, even though we were all friends with his wife. The funny thing was that my roommates were never on the receiving end of his teasing and even though they knew him, weren’t all that interested in him because he was married.

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  50. You might help your readers understand your point if you state it more clearly. You may, for example, want to avoid saying this:

    “Therefore, teasing a girl should be like breathing to you. It should come naturally, with little forethought.”

    to this:

    “…while women love to get teased, their appreciation doesn’t mean you should tease them ALL THE FUCKING TIME, regardless of circumstance.”

    Besides, wouldn’t it be simpler–and more alpha–to win the front leaning rest contest? She is, after all, asking for a display of manliness–peacocking, I think you guys call it.

    Why give her a display of “jerk” instead?

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  51. Besides, wouldn’t it be simpler–and more alpha–to win the front leaning rest contest?

    Do you always do everything girls tell you to do?

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  52. on October 26, 2010 at 3:06 pm anonymouses anonymous

    Some of us aren’t numb skulls. Somehave just nopt been taught these survival skills by a present father, so learning is difficult when your dad isn’t around to kick you in the butt.

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  53. … whining about my unfairness as I declared “victory” over her puny femaleness. She then chased me around the house until I tossed her onto the bed where intimacy commenced.

    Priceless.

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  54. I naturally tease my girl a lot, most of the time when she wants something, I would somehow tease her a bit about it.

    But she has been complaining that I never take her seriously and feel like a burden whenever she asks anything of me and so she’s been acting a bit bitchy lately.

    How should I reconcile her behaviors with your post Roissy?

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  55. @Ms_Fu: We call that “flirting.” Flirting creates a level of intimacy, and may even suggest availability, whatever the marital status. The women he flirted with found him attractive, and those he ignored did not.

    This, by the way, says something important about “game” techniques: pretending women don’t matter won’t make them pay attention to you.

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  56. @Ronin @Roissy “I know this blog has an inordinate number of aspie readers who can’t divine subtleties of argument”

    It has always amazed me, how many guys are just totally oblivious to social signals.

    For example this one guy I knew, would barge up to a girl I had opened, put his face about six inches from hers and then start speaking like a machine gun. Maybe he had some sort of plan, but it sounded like stream of consciousness to me. Inevitable crash and burn.

    Another guy would walk up to a girl and start speaking at length and in detail about his tax minimization strategies. He did this for years and ended up complaining how girls have unrealistic expectations of the guys they might meat in a bar. He now only gets sex by paying for it.

    Can guys like these really learn game?

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  57. @PA: Ah…so it’s about women telling you what to do. Were you unhappy with your domineering mother or something?

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  58. queserasera

    “because the average woman is biologically more valuable than the average man,”

    well, why are most infanticides women? why in china they have an excess of men not of women?

    Because sons are SOCIALLY more valuable to parents than men in China, and China’s had a one child policy for decades.

    Sons and daughter’s-in-law are socially obligated to support and care for the aging parents of sons; it doesn’t work the other way around. There’s little social security or pension wealth in China, and historically there certainly wasn’t.

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  59. RS Scott–

    Besides, wouldn’t it be simpler–and more alpha–to win the front leaning rest contest? She is, after all, asking for a display of manliness–peacocking, I think you guys call it.

    Why give her a display of “jerk” instead?

    Because empirically it works better, generally.

    Though there’s a place for peacocking, aka DHVing or displaying higher value, as well. Generally not in response to her requesting/demanding it though, as PA implies.

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  60. A big problem out there is a guy’s tendency to grossly overestimate a given woman’s intelligence. He will try to tease her, make her laugh etc, but will fail because he simply isn’t being stupid enough. Your humour must be reduced to it’s lowest common denominator in order to be effective.

    In my experience, women appear to be most entertained by ‘induced humility’. That is, dominating others via comments about their appearence, work, finances etc. It’s all in good fun, until one of your buddies commits suicide (she’d find it funny, but you may not).

    On high-school badboys, they were all remedial-level students. They had low iq’s and were able to communicate with women at their level.

    Dumb yourself down considerably and enjoy success with women.

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  61. @Doug1: What empirical evidence do you have that giving the woman a display of jerk instead of alpha, whether or not she asked to see it, works better (generally!) than peacocking?

    I think you win the front leaning rest contest, and then tease her about how weak she is with a “wanna try arm wrestling?” line.

    If your argument is that fulfilling the requests/demands of women is never a good idea, I think you have it wrong.

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  62. @ R. Stanton Scott.
    True what you said about the flirting. But the fact of the matter is that teasing works better than other forms of flirting, such as flattery. At least for me.

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  63. “Dumb yourself down considerably and enjoy success with women.”

    Just be sure to show enough intelligence a certain times for a good DHV, especially for women older than their mid-20s.

    Showing intelligence is a tough one. Women conflate good communication skills with high intelligence. A guy who is a total genius but with poor communication skills is seen as stupid.

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  64. Why not just be natural? Is there any scientifically validated evidence that teasing women for dating purposes work? What if I were reported for sexual (or general) harassment?

    As a male I am intimidating to women, since I could literally kill any one of them with my bare hands. Would I? Of course not, since murder is the pinnacle of immorality, but the women themselves do not know that. Assuaging her fear should be the first on the list of priorities.

    Although I have no ambition whatsoever to date supermodels or princesses (I’ll leave those to the top senior executives and CEOs, and princes respectively), I still want to date a decent, intelligent girl who is reasonably attractive. Even if I had a supermodel through some miracle the work put into such a relationship would be a genuine craft, and I’d have the typical feeling during and after a very competitive venture of tasting my own blood and feeling very jittery, since the more elite a person’s competition the higher the probability of losing to said competition. So if I had a supermodel quality lady any Social Register American who lives in a co-op on the Upper East Side, in addition to owning a house on Long Island, prominent Ivy professor, senior law partner at a prestigious firm, senior executive, etc, could simply whisk her away from me. How am I (or any regular guy) supposed to compete with that high-quality competition?

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  65. @JayM

    LOL…i dont think ANY Ivy League Profs are dating super models. Sorry brah.

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  66. @Ms_Fu: Flirting is an art that goes far beyond simple flattery or teasing. It is an expression of sexual interest and an establishment of intimacy–or at least an openness to it. Teasing can help with this, but must be used with a very light touch in this context.

    Marital status normally makes no difference with regard to whether we reciprocate flirting. Psychologically and socially we use flirting to validate our attractiveness to the opposite sex whether or not we plan to act on it. You developed a crush because he hinted a crush on you, making you feel attractive.

    Your roommates did not–or never showed it–simply because he expressed no interest. They knew it would not be returned, even platonically.

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  67. and one more thing Jay…your problem is that you think of yourself as a regular guy. Check out roosh. do you think he thinks of himself as a regular guy?

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  68. @JayM

    You are not a regular guy. You sound like an incredibly awkward guy with no social skills whatsoever. I am an INTJ personality myself (not the most socially outgoing or empathetic), but you sound full-blown spergy. You sound incapable of having lighthearted social fun, which is what melts most women.

    That said, if your’e trolling, bravo.

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  69. Gotta have a sense of proportion! When she’s burying her mother and leans over for one last look into the casket, limit yourself to just a gentle slap on the ass. And if she’s on chemotherapy and all her hair falls out, don’t say you feel like you’re having sex with Yul Brynner.

    On the other hand, chicks who were abused in childhood can be a real hoot if you threaten to kill them when they won’t give you a blowjob. The look of terror means she wants you.

    [Editor: reductio ad aspergdum.]

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  70. Trimegistus–

    Pretty funny dude.

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  71. R. Stanton Scott

    @Doug1: What empirical evidence do you have that giving the woman a display of jerk instead of alpha, whether or not she asked to see it, works better (generally!) than peacocking?

    My own personal experience primarily.

    And it’s not jerk exactly. It’s playful, or a little harder edged than that, teasing (esp. if she’s real hot and full of herself from all the chasing she’s used to). Sometimes called asshole game, though that suggests something harder edged than is most successful with the most girls, especially classier ones.

    Like


  72. on October 26, 2010 at 5:10 pm Steve Johnson

    PA,

    Try windshield wipers (youtube it). Super intense ab workout.

    Like


  73. R. Stanton Scott

    If your argument is that fulfilling the requests/demands of women is never a good idea, I think you have it wrong.

    Requests often enough, sure, just not always, especially before putting her through teasing. Demands — basically no. She shouldn’t be making demands. She’s not the boss.

    Like


  74. R. Stanton Scott–

    Read Chateau’s last paragraph, aspie.

    Like


  75. @jay m,

    Women are not intimidated by you, I would drop that. Every serial killer on death row is getting fan mail from women on a daily basis.

    Keep in mind, every bitch married to a guy in a suit is jerking off to auto mechanics covered in grease. You’re being logical and rational, you need to stop.

    Be exciting and mysterious. Above all, be confident. Most women of 9 and 10 pedigree, do not get approached by men very often. They can smell fear. Act like your Mick fucking Jagger and she will give you an audience. If you’re game is tight, she will exercise her right to be unfaithful to her husband.

    Don’t cling either. Act like you will give her the fuck of her life and then disappear forever. She will love you for it.

    Like


  76. Jay M–

    How am I (or any regular guy) supposed to compete with that high-quality competition?

    To some extent the answer is you’re not and can’t, but you’ve got it completely twisted as to the reality of what the high-quality competition is.

    First of all in the current age of feminism enabled sluttery and semi sluttery, there are two different mating markets. One is for marriage, and the other is for having fun while vaguely, no rush, looking out for mister right (casual and semi casual sex “casual sex”).

    For the later status and game are what matter most. Game means basically psychosexual dominance and playful agility. Status for casual sex means small group status mostly, i.e. ability to lead a small or medium group on an ad hoc, as opposed to big organization or money assigned basis. Status and game to bleed together in the middle to a good degree.

    For marriage wider society status, loyalty and fidelity to her, compatibility and ease of living with each other, and money become much more important than in casual sex. Dad and mate qualities rather than cad and thrills ones go up the scale. Of course the ideal is a blend of the two for marriage, differing according to the woman. There are also a small number of women who want submissive men, especially these feminist days. Most of them will cheat.

    Like


  77. @Doug1: I’m the only one pointing out the contradictory “teasing should come as naturally as breathing/don’t use tease all the time” message.

    And I’m not the one using personal anecdotal experience to make an empirical claim.

    But I’m the one with Asperger’s.

    Calling names. The last refuge of people who don’t know what they are talking about.

    Like


  78. I just have to post this again….I think my guy is BRILLIANT!!!

    Timing, facial expressions, just the right amount, ooooooh, he’s so good! I have to mention, he is caring too.

    Over the weekend, this is what happened.

    My new guy said as we were going out…..
    Him:”Hey, don’t you think you’ll be cold wearing this?”
    Me: “We’re not going to walk around all day!”
    Him:”I’m going to be pushing you out of the car….(smirk on his face)”
    Me:”lol !!!!!!” That’s a good one!!! I like it!! hahahhaha!!

    We were both laughing!!!

    What do you call this exchange?

    Like


  79. So many of us were smacked or told-on when we pulled ponytails..Or told our nostrils are too big.

    Reminds me of the time I grabbed a girl by her arms too hard and left bruises. I was so aaaawkwaaaard aaaggghhhh!!

    Why would you let your son have a fucking Donnie Wahlberg tail? Why would you do that??

    Like


  80. Stanton–

    And I’m not the one using personal anecdotal experience to make an empirical claim.

    What are you, retarded? There’s no contradiction between empirical and anecdotal.

    Personal snecdotal is not good science but it is good empiricism.

    Furthermore, it works for me in game.

    Like


  81. @ Badwiring

    I had a similar problem. I guess I still do but I can usually minimize or avoid it now. The key for me was gaining an understanding my own neurochemistry, it all comes back to that. People imagine that their mind is some kind of metaphysical being, it isn’t. Your mind and your brain are the same thing.

    Like


  82. Occasionally being a dick/jerk/inconsiderate is a necessity to cause some confusion. Keeps them wondering “Gee, does he like/love me?”. They should never feel like they know 100% what is going on.

    If you fuck up and over do it you’ll know it. Then use your brain and fix it.

    It isn’t rocket science.

    Like


  83. […] ensinando que trolar as mulheres deve ser uma prática constante e natural. […]

    Like


  84. Is there any chance that you could stick to writing pieces like this instead of the crap you write on politics? The politics pieces are a dime a dozen but when you’re writing on subjects like this I still feel like it’s somewhat unique.

    I’m not complaining, I’ve learnt a lot from this blog, but I don’t come here for the politics.

    Like


  85. I like the politics entries. I don’t always agree with them, but it is nice to know that Roissy has more on his mind pussy, mind my language.

    Like


  86. @ what,
    I think your boyfriend is trying to kill you.

    Like


  87. on October 26, 2010 at 7:20 pm Far From Home

    1. Firepower is pretty funny.

    2. What’s with the sudden aspergers kick from everyone here?

    Like


  88. on October 26, 2010 at 7:36 pm gameo schmameo

    Furthermore, it works for me in game.

    … those eBabes will just cyber with anyone

    kids these days.

    Like


  89. @Ms_Fu

    I don’t blame him. What a boring woman.

    P.S. Bring back Roissy. Quality not quantity.

    Like


  90. Yeah, keeping a straight face is a tricky one, even when you’re not trying to be a tease. Some years ago I was telling some female flatmates about the names of the quarks, you know, Up, Down, Truth, Beauty, Charm and Strange and they wouldn’t believe me and thought I was having them on (no Internet available to prove it), and their disbelief made me giggle and smirk and then they *really* thought I –

    OMG I’m such a loser beta nerd, aren’t I….

    Like


  91. Ms_Fu,

    hahahha!! He can kill me whenever he wants!!! hee! hee!

    Like


  92. on October 26, 2010 at 8:19 pm david letterman

    how funny would it be if Roissy was just some creative neckbeard virgin who plays WoW all day and gets all his dating advice from watching re-runs of the honeymooners?

    Its possible

    Like


  93. “And I’m not the one using personal anecdotal experience to make an empirical claim.

    But I’m the one with Asperger’s.”

    hee hee heeeee

    Like


  94. I think there should be a distinction between aspies who interpret everything literally and the general wallflowers, betas and their reformed versions who like myself have gone through an epiphany of socio-biological realism at some stage and so get a lot of satisfaction from what Roissy says and corroborate it with their own observations and experiences.

    Granted, there is a difference between knowing the truth, being observant etcetera and actually being able to internalise alpha behaviours. The higher you are on the autistic spectrum, the harder it is.

    Like


  95. on October 26, 2010 at 9:30 pm Willard Libby

    Not only is this writer not the old roissy, my guess is it’s a lady blogger friend of the old roissy.

    A chick wrote this and many of the newer posts as well.

    Like


  96. queefdom == quimdom?

    Like


  97. on October 26, 2010 at 10:07 pm Gunslingergregi

    ”””’i can NOT wait for the gallstones discussion”””’

    You will eat my gall stone he he he

    Like


  98. on October 26, 2010 at 10:10 pm Gunslingergregi

    ””””””on October 26, 2010 at 3:19 pm AL
    I naturally tease my girl a lot, most of the time when she wants something, I would somehow tease her a bit about it.

    But she has been complaining that I never take her seriously and feel like a burden whenever she asks anything of me and so she’s been acting a bit bitchy lately.

    How should I reconcile her behaviors with your post Roissy?
    ””””’

    She shouldn’t have time to require you to do things with the laundry list of shit she is doing for you.

    Like


  99. “I reached out and swatted her inner elbow while she was in her pushup, and she crumpled to the ground, whining about my unfairness as I declared “victory” over her puny femaleness.”

    I thought would have funny if she had have face-planted the floor with a “WTF!”

    “I know this blog has an inordinate number of aspie readers who can’t divine subtleties of argument . . .”

    Yeah like 80%! 😛 Maybe that’s where the Om3ga Factor comes in. Aspies don’t get the difference between ribbing and bullying so when they have a go at ribbing they end up in trouble and think “well I’m not trying that again!” Np gaming = no girls, no sex, no life and more profits for Blizzard and Bungie! 😛

    Whoops forgot to put my name on. 😦

    Like


  100. on October 26, 2010 at 10:31 pm Gunslingergregi

    ”””’Np gaming = no girls, no sex, no life and more profits for Blizzard and Bungie! :P””’

    Wrong

    It equals money in your pocket if you treat life like the game.

    But yea ok you may have to quit playing the game for a bit to play at life.

    Treating life like a game you will win in every metric.

    Like


  101. man oh man alive there are some numbskulls on this board.If you’ve got lots of numbskulls posting on your boards, you’re doing it right.

    Like


  102. Guess I’m the numbskull, I fucked up the html again.

    UGH.

    Like


  103. Jay M wrote:

    “As a male I am intimidating to women, since I could literally kill any one of them with my bare hands. Would I? Of course not, since murder is the pinnacle of immorality, but the women themselves do not know that. ”

    When I read that it reminded me very much of this movie scene …

    Brigadier General Jack Ripper:

    Loss of essence.
    I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake.
    Women sense my power and they seek the life essence.
    I do not avoid women, Mandrake.
    But I do deny them my essence.

    Group Captain Lionel Mandrake: Yes, yes, Jack.

    Thanks!

    Like


  104. Just curious, why does this site attract people with Asperger’s?

    Like


  105. I mean “no gaming = . . .” in the PUA sense of “gaming” not “no playing video games”. 😦 Or “no PUA gaming = more time and money to play video games”

    Like


  106. on October 27, 2010 at 2:29 am Gunslingergregi

    the most circular argument in the history of the world.

    What you do is treat work like you are leveling up.

    Then you also don’t need to spend much as you level up so you save loot.

    Then surprize when you have loot you have bitches willing to wait on you hand and foot while you play games.

    You are correct though that once you get past the need to game and have your lackey bitches do it for you that you can have more time for video games.

    lol

    About to hit the states again and have to go again into hibernation save money still get my nuts licked mode while I level up some money.

    Also once loot aquired more time to play game of life and video games.

    Just that video games are a little more exciting and faster paced than real life a lot of times.

    There are only so many of those super adrenaline pumping moments in real life.

    I just had another one but still.

    The ket though is before video games become an acceptable pastime you got to treat work like a video game so that you can then be accepted for your umm challenging hobby.

    Because of course when you have loot and time you can always find a bitch to take care of mundane shit like washing your balls.

    Like


  107. on October 27, 2010 at 3:39 am Ceyx and Alcyone

    “Puny femaleness”? This is the reason I generally really dislike this blog. Statements like these are so normal that I can’t even tell when you’re joking.

    [Editor: And yet another humorless aspie heard from. If you’ve ever had a normal human relationship in your life you’d know that teasing as described in the post between a man and woman is fun. But as the fembot crank you are, I guess you’d have no knowledge of such things except in your head where “superiority power dynamics” must explain everything that isn’t stamped for approval by the anti-gender bias league of disgusting dykes.]

    It should go without saying, but in most cases when women do this, we’re not trying to demonstrate superiority, we’re flirting. You were responding to her initial flirtation. Rather than go off on some rant about power dynamics, however, I’ll just say it takes two to tango (it does). If she hadn’t started it, it would have gone nowhere. If you hadn’t responded, it would have gone nowhere.

    Anyway, I agree with your overall message. Teasing is important– for both genders.

    Also:
    “A big problem out there is a guy’s tendency to grossly overestimate a given woman’s intelligence. He will try to tease her, make her laugh etc, but will fail because he simply isn’t being stupid enough. Your humour must be reduced to it’s lowest common denominator in order to be effective.”

    Sounds like the women you date are sub-par. Sounds like a personal problem. And no, I won’t read your response, and no, I don’t care about how hot you think they were, or any generalization which you’re bound to make to justify the type of sub-par women you attract/pursue.

    Also, here’s an idea: you’re not (*gasp!*) that intelligent or funny.

    OK? Thanks.

    Like


  108. Wasn’t Roissy working on a book? I wonder why he would in the mean time allow his brand name to be diluted by these other, lesser writers. Strange marketing strategy.

    Like


  109. Very important remark at the end about how there are some readers who take his advice too literally without regard to how the context of one situation doesn’t fit another.

    That results in the nit-picking of other’s field reports and its probably a good reason why few people post field reports on this blog much anymore.

    @Ceyx & the Seventh Sister

    I wasn’t just referring to your comment in the above. I was referring to aspiring young PUAs who take one piece of advice and apply it too broadly, then come back and try to lecture others.

    You can’t be too much of a feminist for choosing the name of a mythological married couple where the wife committed suicide because her husband was killed at sea.

    The “puny” remark in the post was clearly something you’d say to tease a woman. It would be said with a grin.

    Like


  110. @ Ceyx and Alcyone

    “OK? Thanks.”

    This american-female-typical form of speech is common and ridicilous and tells something to those who can see.

    You so desparatly need validation that you answer “Thanks” to your own question. But nobody confirmed your “OK” to you!

    Your pedestal is in your mind and you are a person who will not accept reality to keep linivg in your pleasant illusions.

    You will give an imagenery show to an imagined audiance, and clap your hands for yourself. Then you will feel like you are a superstar. But you are just a worthless nobody.

    Like


  111. People who think Roissy has left the building are stupid fucks with no intuitive understanding of human nature. It’s the same guy, morons!

    Like


  112. @Doug1: When I asked for your empirical evidence you suggested that your own experience counts. Though based on observations, and therefore in some sense “empirical,” anecdotes about your life say very little about the world and how it works “generally.”

    For example, UFOs don’t exist just because I think I see them.

    And I think it’s interesting that someone who so clearly thinks he has this right must characterize his opponent as “retarded” or “aspie” during the discussion–not exactly an alpha trait.

    I’ll refrain from reciprocating the insult except to point out BuffFemale’s line in the “Alpha Assessment Submissions” thread:

    “How to tell if you are a beta: you get together with a bunch of guys online to figure out how to talk to a girl.”

    [Editor: Finding hard scientific evidence for the efficacy of game principles and tactics is tough because 1. most scientists aren’t interested in looking into the matter, 2. funding is nonexistent, and 3. the nature of the inquiry presents a very high difficulty level for controlled experimentation. Therefore, we must rely on men’s experiences in the field and agreement among men who’ve lived a day in their lives about the clearly observable patterns of female behavior, buttressed by evo psych discoveries.
    Stop being a schmuck.]

    Like


  113. on October 27, 2010 at 7:26 am almost 40 year old virgin

    Have to add my 2€s on the supposed higher biological worth of females.
    It´s clear that our western societies are brainwashed into such thinking for quite a while.
    Taking a peek above the little self-important western soup bowl one quickly realizes the actual truth though.

    Females always were and world-wide still are a step under the male in biological worth. It begins in tribal societies where an abundance of females makes the tribe weak and easy target for a “hostile takeover” and continues with the financial ruin of having to pay dowries for your many daughters.

    China is another great example, India is headed there too.

    More than 100 million males without a chance to get a mate makes everybody on this planet with two braincells to bang together very antsy.
    The same scenario with females?
    A society doomed to fail and easy pickings for their neighbors.

    Yes, I know I´m actually supplanting social worth with the basic fact of a male fathering many children, thus biological speaking a healthy female is actually worth more.

    But this simple darwinistic view became obsolete for humans the minute we learned speech and started to socialize with each other, leading to “harnessing” the “female resource” of enemy tribes.

    Alas even Roissy can fall for feminist fallacies. I recommend less fucking around and more thinking. 😛

    Like


  114. R. Stanton Scott,
    CR knocking his girlfriend off the pull-up bar rather than just beating her at the bent arm hang is more unexpected and therefore funnier.

    Like


  115. Stanton “And I think it’s interesting that someone who so clearly thinks he has this right must characterize his opponent as “retarded” or “aspie” during the discussion–not exactly an alpha trait.”
    –> Haha ya I was just noticing this, I was thinking projection, myself.

    Lets see here what are some of the defining characteristics of asburger’s hmm:
    * For example, a person with AS may engage in a one-sided, long-winded speech about a favorite topic –> check! lol How many times have we heard the marriage two point oh child support equals sign stealth alimony thing. From a man who’s claims hes never even had to pay it. And lets not go into the feminist here, feminist there, feminist every where thing lol.
    * Some of them may even display selective mutism, speaking not at all to most people and excessively to specific people. Some may choose to talk only to people they like –> check!
    * they may be able to show a theoretical understanding of other people’s emotions; however, they typically have difficulty acting on this knowledge in fluid, real-life situations. –> check! haha
    * People with AS may analyze and distill their observation of social interaction into rigid behavioral guidelines –> check!
    * Individuals with AS may collect volumes of detailed information on a relatively narrow topic –> check!
    * Speech and writing may convey a sense of incoherence; the conversational style often includes excessive wordiness or monologues about topics that bore the listener, fails to provide context for comments, or fails to suppress internal thoughts –> hahahaha oh my lord check!

    I think we have a diagnosis doc!

    Like


  116. […] Teasing Should Be Like Breathing « Citizen Renegade. […]

    Like


  117. Once, she bought a shirt in one of those boutique stores. We were at the counter and I was purchasing some jeans and talking to the girl there. My gf asked me how I liked her shirt. I said, “I love it — my grandmother used to have one just like it.”

    She laughed so hard I thought she was going to fall over. The girl behind the counter hid. I just shrugged and said, “What’s funny? My grandmother was a very stylish woman.”

    That got me smacked. I shrugged it off. She was telling people the story months later.

    Another time, she was telling me why her marriage failed … he did this and he did that. I told her the problem was that she didn’t know her role. She said, “What do you mean?” I said, “Your job is to humbly and quietly serve your man. You weren’t submissive. You should try it. It’ll make you happy.”

    I thought her head would explode. I mean this is a very strong alpha woman … another eyes widened in horror and she screamed — and she laughed and cried and raged at the same time. I just sat there and ate my potato chips. Then, a few days later, after insisting she’d never ever ever submit, she did. For a while, at least.

    Unfortunately, these were two of only a few bright moments. I don’t keep this up enough. I can be the biggest beta in the world sometimes. I was raised by women and have beta behavior scored into my brain — but I think I have natural alpha instincts that I can draw on. Perhaps that’s true of all men.

    My girlfriend talks about men she dated in the past … and she always mentions this teasing. Men who knocked her off her pedestal. That’s the key.

    And yes, it was good advice to add the caveats. Sometimes things need to be spelled out for us slower students.

    Like


  118. BTW, one thing I’ve learned in the field — and only in the past couple of years. There are occasions when I say something that she finds monumentally offensive. Sometimes I back off.

    But occasionally you just gotta keep going. I used to have a saying, “When in a hole, stop digging.” But there are other times when you are better off to keep going — as long as you do it with good humor and a shrug.

    I forgot what I said (probably women shouldn’t vote) and she was flipping out and waiting for me to back off, as I usually do.

    Instead, I just kept going. She said, “Aren’t you going to stop digging?” and I said, “Nope, gonna dig all the way to China.” She smacked me on the arm, then moved over next to me, and said, “Asshole.” And she kissed me. I thought to myself, WTF — all these years of trying to be reasonable with women — and being an asshole works?”

    Like


  119. Ceyx, what’s wrong with men calling females puny? In relation to men, most women are quite weak and naturally smaller. Plus, puny signifies “small” so it’s actually kind of a compliment.

    I have worked out with heavy weights for 10 months. I recently joined crossfit. I squat and bench and sprint and am making fantastic gains. Yet, my husband, who’s idea of a workout is a vigorous debate on Zero Hedge could outbench, outrun, and out-everything me on on a physical plane. He even has more muscles than me- someone who works out. He’s strong because he is a man. I like to feel puny next to him 🙂

    Like


  120. @Audrey: Target. Cease fire.

    Like


  121. @ R. Stanton Scott

    I don’t give a shit about your spat with Doug1. But clearly you haven’t been a reader long enough to understand the aspergery behavior Roissy was talking about in the original post. Let me elucidate.

    Game is powerful because it uses scientific insights into the psychology of women’s attraction, something that has literally never been done before in all of human history. Because we can derive these general principles based on evo psych, it tempts nerd-types into treating women as an engineering problem that can be unlocked in a 2+2=4 manner. Unfortunately, women have different personalities, different venues will have different ambiances with different effects, conversations will take different turns, etc. Game is effective when the princples are applied to specific contexts, which is why practice and individualization is more important than theory.

    The aspergery nerds who comment on here, however, don’t move past the strict logical, engineering view of women. They’ll say something generic like “Be more dominant” or “Show higher value by ignoring her or flirting with another girl,” without regard to the social context. Roissy’s comment was directed at these guys.

    Like


  122. Willard Libby

    Not only is this writer not the old roissy, my guess is it’s a lady blogger friend of the old roissy.

    A chick wrote this and many of the newer posts as well.

    gee, i hope its lemmonex or kassyk

    that chick has the kind
    of plush bottom I enjoy

    Like


  123. @Readerlon, that’s an interesting article from the economist, but do you not realize that Goldman Sachs rhymes with Tucker Max lozzzl?

    Like


  124. @Bill, if you’re with a girl that has been abused and can’t take a little teasing, run the other way. More baggage than delta.

    Like


  125. @Cauthon: Thank you for clarifying. Don’t you think, however, that describing the behavior he intends to address would be a more effective technique for Roissy, especially if he wants to get his points across to those of us who don’t yet know all the inside jokes? It would also help keep others from seeing him and his commenters as a bunch of windbags who resort to insults because they can’t or won’t back up their claims.

    But if you prefer the shorthand, I suggest you all choose a derogatory term that describes the “nerds” better than it describes PUAs (see Audrey at 7:57 AM).

    In any event, may I respectfully ask how you can claim that Game has power based on “scientific insights into the psychology of women’s attraction” and that evolutionary psychology lays out workable “general principles” and then argue that it doesn’t always work because women have different personalities? Either evolution drives the female sexual response or it doesn’t, and “personalities” cannot be an exogenous variable in the evo psych explanation of how this works. So please fill me in on how evo psych explains these different “personalities” and other variations in the female sexual response. After all, if they matter in your scientifically generalizable and systematic description of how and why women choose the men they do evo psych must tell us why.

    Like


  126. R. Stanton Scott

    @Doug1: When I asked for your empirical evidence you suggested that your own experience counts. Though based on observations, and therefore in some sense “empirical,” anecdotes about your life say very little about the world and how it works “generally.”

    “Counts” for what?? Look Stanton, I don’t care about convincing you. I said from the get go that of course personal experience isn’t scientific proof.

    Further I didn’t start out attacking you. I called you retarded after you attacked me as not being scientifically convincing in telling you that my personal experience, rather than having read up on any scientific studies of whether game or teasing works or not, is why I think playful teasing is gold in game. I don’t care about scientifically or logically convincing you.

    And yeah it was kind of aspie to argue that teasing is less effective than DHVing in the types of situations Chateau used as illustrations, by deducing that from your (mistaken) concept of what’s alpha and therefore what MUST work best.

    Actually as I also said teasing and DHVing are both part of game, push, pull. Starting out with DHVing though tends to be try hard, and chasing, qualifying yourself, rather than getting her to invest in you first. Starting with some push often in the form of negging or teasing is one of Mystery’s fundamental insights in developing game.

    Game is fundamentally not a science but an art. Many principles of game can be rooted in evo psych though, and Chateau/Roissy in particular does that frequently. Other and earlier leading developers of game such as Mystery and most others simply experimented with different techniques empirically, then developed patterns and routines and general theories tying it together, from what they saw working. There are also quite a few teaching game that aren’t very good at it themselves and some who are pretty much charlatans it seems. No direct experience with that.

    Like


  127. Cauthon–

    The aspergery nerds who comment on here, however, don’t move past the strict logical, engineering view of women. They’ll say something generic like “Be more dominant” or “Show higher value by ignoring her or flirting with another girl,” without regard to the social context. Roissy’s comment was directed at these guys.

    Well said.

    Like


  128. If one defines Aspergers as not being able to break out of theory, the Aspie types one sees most often around here are lurkers or those once per month posters who have a fixed idea of the universal truth of simplistic stuff they found on page 1 of their PUA for Beginners book…and anyone whose advanced ideas might step on such a broad simplistic idea has to be attacked with fury.

    This type can suddenly get angry when they see what is apparently a PUA rule being broken.

    But they won’t necessarily be able to write long comments. Simplistic theory doesn’t take many words to repeat.

    On another thread I just got attacked by an occasional poster who, in a long field report I wrote, spotted me saying one line to a girl that I might help out if she was in financial trouble (I had noted in parentheses that I was bluffing). He couldn’t, and apparently still can’t, break out of his solid conviction that, since its considered beta to buy a stranger a drink, talk of money is wrong in all contexts and situations, whether bluffing or not.

    There are people reading this blog who aren’t gaming women in real life but feel they’re the arbiters of a simplified Roissy Code (formulated in their heads) that they haven’t yet figured out is often contradictory or nuanced…because you need to be in the field to see where theory breaks down, where they don’t apply or where theories conflict with each other.

    Like


  129. @Doug1: You made a claim, I asked you to back it up, and you tried to do so. For someone not worried about convincing me you spend a lot of time trying to do it, and you only said you didn’t care to when you realized you couldn’t.

    How very alpha of you.

    Like


  130. Game is an art, but its principles are based in science and validated by experiments. Neil Strauss’s book The Game describes the methods that the early pioneers of game used: They would form a hypothesis, go out in the field to test it multiple times, report back their results, then analyze the data. They would use that data to falsify the hypothesis, confirm it, or change it. That’s science, even when non-scientists do it.

    When ten men go out and try something counter-intuitive (teasing a girl instead of offering to buy her a drink) and nine of those ten report back that they had good results, and then twenty more go out and try it and eighteen report good results, and so on, there is obviously a message there in the data.

    The early pioneers of game performed hundreds of these kinds of experiments, which were very similar in structure and execution to social experiments performed by academics. It was science, and they discovered truths that probably could only have been discovered using the methods they chose.

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  131. “Keep in mind, every bitch married to a guy in a suit is jerking off to auto mechanics covered in grease. You’re being logical and rational, you need to stop.”

    I thought one needed logic in every venture, since everything is essentially a science.

    “Be exciting and mysterious; above all, be confident. Most women of 9 and 10 pedigree are not approached by men very often. They can smell fear. Act like your Mick fucking Jagger and she will give you an audience. If your game is tight, she will exercise her right to be unfaithful to her husband.”

    Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind. So smart and beautiful women aren’t oftentimes approached? Just making it to the date is good, and if she doesn’t like me I never take it personally. Coffee dates are great and footsie typically feels good, and conversing is great as it gives me information on her interests and what she likes. Art museums (or musea in the original Latin) are great for third dates. Women like romance and the spontaneous, out of the blue roses when in a relationship.

    “Don’t cling either. Act like you will give her the fuck of her life and then disappear forever. She will love you for it.”

    I know that women aren’t into clingy men, since no one wants to be the creepy guy who calls everyday. Additionally, clinginess would be social suicide anyway.

    “For marriage wider society status, loyalty and fidelity to her, compatibility and ease of living with each other, and money become much more important than in casual sex. Dad and mate qualities rather than cad and thrills ones go up the scale. Of course the ideal is a blend of the two for marriage, differing according to the woman. There are also a small number of women who want submissive men, especially these feminist days. Most of them will cheat.”

    Thanks for the warning 😀 I have previously read this blog:

    http://alphadominance.com/?p=373

    that states that most women will cheat if given the opportunity. As disgusted as I was I remembered that I would probably do the same thing if given the opportunity (although as a male I would have far fewer opportunities). For instance, in a hypothetical situation where I’m married, and the princess of Sweden, Lydia Hearst (or any 10) hit on me then I’d perform “eugenics” with them with spankings, and a deep, gentle preliminary massage 😉

    Marriage is essentially a business contract meant to merge the male and female parties’ property, and the raison d’être is to create a safety net for the children.

    Again, thanks everyone for the information, it’s much appreciated!

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  132. The worst is the Aspie’s think they’re on a higher plane, but it turns out to be a crackhead robot version of the standard line from the University.

    What is this, Scott is arguing the advice is unsound because thousands of conversations with people are less rigorous than conducting experiments on the Universe, which they presume is constant over time and space?

    Does he think more accurate results will come from the feminist professor’s study on self-reported responses from the latest batch of college freshmen?

    What experiment will demonstrate the art of conversation?

    Half of our experimental men failed, and were slapped, because their light playful teasing came off as rude insults. All 1000 experimental men nevertheless reported success. I guess we have to standardize the experiment by using robots! All 1000 of our experimental robots failed to get a date by teasing!

    Experience is what tells you the “empirical studies” he wants to replace experience with, are bogus.

    Like


  133. on October 27, 2010 at 8:00 pm Gunslingergregi

    You only need one thing the apocolypse opener he he he

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  134. on October 27, 2010 at 8:03 pm Gunslingergregi

    Game can be proven and it has.

    Like


  135. on October 27, 2010 at 8:06 pm Gunslingergregi

    Fuck yea you got to tease.

    Or you can just be serious all the fucking time which probably works too if you want only the employee employer relationship.

    Depends what you want.

    Never tease and then you have no spontanaity/playfullness.

    Be always serious and you create robots.

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  136. “I thought one needed logic in every venture, since everything is essentially a science.

    You are projecting the logic of rational decision-making on these girls.

    If you want to apply science:

    a) The human female is more controlled by her limbic system, not the executive function of the frontal cognitive areas. As long as her limbic system is stimulated by your strength, and her logical or shaming areas are not stimulated, she will submit.

    In rational persons, the executive function monitors and activates on its own, and will stop the body. In the new herb egghead world, this means most of the men are nervous with the sexy ladies, instead of giving into their base desires like the girls.

    Historically, the female limbic system was controlled by stronger shaming and stronger marriage.

    b) The evolutionary function of the human female seems to be almost entirely focused on getting the best man in order to reproduce successfully.

    The woman can have one baby a year, while the man can be indiscriminate. The woman tries to upgrade to the alpha, either by getting his seed or even capturing him as a provider, while the man can even improve his evolutionary success by keeping both his current girl and adding the supermodel.

    While the females share in maintaining social cohesion, with their chatting and shaming, the logical requirements of tribe defense, hunting expeditions, etc. fall on the men and their stronger bodies and bigger brains.

    Beyond these speculative beginnings, we see why even in antiquity the great poets and philosophers were men. How many men hermitted themselves in their studies, while many women seem unable to sit still alone in a room.

    How feminist education has taught the man’s executive function to estop and fear lusty thoughts, while the same education has freed the female limbic system from the domination and oppression of those male faculties: logic and discipline.

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  137. “I thought one needed logic in every venture, since everything is essentially a science.

    Also, this is just bogus. Logic does not supply creativity. It doesn’t even truly supply the premises for your science.

    Systems of rules tend toward error when the “rules” of your art of conversation need to be always flowing.

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  138. @BadWiring

    Have you tried drinking in bars?

    Like


  139. I score very high on the Autism Quotient and low on the Empathy Quotient – although most people like me. I think I have learned, intellectually, how to get along with people. I have had reasonable success with women, and am happily married.

    But I do understand the concern here. What Asperger’s (note the spelling) men have trouble with is intuiting what is the right behaviour and remark at the precise moment. Also, they have trouble drawing reasonable behavioural lines. So, they can veer all over the place, from wimpy beta to excessive alpha.

    Women are a particular concern and problem for introverted, Asperger’s types because they tend to be like the story of the three bears and Goldilocks. You have to get it Just Right. Most women want, for example, a bit of social dominance from a man, but not too much. That is very confusing for the excessively analytical mind of the Asperger’s type.

    What I have just written isn’t quite right either, because sometimes a woman may indeed want Too Much, if she is ovulating, or with a man she really admires, or if she just does. Or if she knows damn well that she is on a pedestal and is itching to be knocked of it by a man she respects.

    (BTW, my sister’s marriage failed after many years and two children. She is now alone, although she has a good job as a nurse. The truth, which I hinted at to our mother, is that she simply forgot to be a submissive wife.)

    Back to the basic problem. The Asperger’s male tries too hard to solve the problem of women in an analytical way. He sees everything as a problem subject to analysis. He is used to solving life’s problems with his intellect; but women flummox him.

    In reality, most Apsperger’s types solve the problem by “overlearning the negative lesson”, which is typical of introverts, and give up on the alpha because it has gotten them into trouble. They therefore give up altogether and settle into miserable betatude. The typical coldness and austerity of the more autistic male should attract women, but for some reason it does not. (Although it has done for me, but I am more attractive than the average.) Moreover if they do attract a woman, they don’t seem to know what to do with her.

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  140. @Fred

    Agreed. Note you just inadvertently pointed out where so many Aspergers types, mostly lurkers, go wrong.

    Yes, thousands of scientific experiments have proven beyond a shadow of a doubt that a man shouldn’t buy a female stranger a drink at a bar before he’s gotten her phone number and switched to another venue. Some will theorize that women don’t respect men who give while not expecting to get (a good theory). Others will theorize that women don’t respect men who give them money for any reason (a feminist-inspired theory).

    How does one solve this?

    How many experiments were conducted where the man asks the woman to lift her shirt before he buys her that drink?

    That creates an entirely different dynamic with a different result pattern.

    This also threatens to destroy the incipient feminism implied in the “confirmed theory” that “women don’t respect men who spend money on them for any reason”.

    Now you can say that asking a woman to lift her shirt to “earn her drink” is a great tease and it fits within the dominant theory properly.

    I would agree with you on that.

    But Aspergers lurkers will cling to the idea that one must NEVER buy a woman a drink at a bar, even after a tease elicited a shirt and bra lift.

    …even after men report excellent results regarding such brazen requests.

    For the nerds, sitting at home reading PUA material, the original PUA Principle stands and they, as beginners, will arrogantly tell experienced guys that they are “Beta” and won’t be respected by women even if the experienced guy is reporting how groups of women at bars are lifting their shirts (back at his place if necessary).

    Nerds in their mother’s basement in London also can’t fathom that women behave differently in different places (regions or resorts for instance).

    One can take a scientifically accurate study about female behavior in a narrow context (meeting strangers in a bar and letting them stay fully dressed at the bar) and form overly-broad conclusions.

    ————–

    Now the problem isn’t with regulars but with lurkers.

    They’ll read a little PUA material online and suddenly they’re experts on how to operate in the real world.

    They’ll jump in to attack regulars.

    And those who cling to theory over experience can write annoyingly *short* comments rather than long ones.

    Witness this attack on me over at another thread:

    http://roissy.wordpress.com/2010/10/23/good-examples-of-readers-passing-shit-tests/

    Some clown decided, on the basis of the above cited “confirmed experiments about buying drinks” that it is wrong to agree to do a university student’s homework on the first date, even if that might be the only way to easily secure that first date will happen quickly.

    He extrapolated buying a drink in a bar to helping a woman with her homework.

    He said “don’t be used” even if being used resulted in a “pity fuck”.

    Obviously, someone’s reading too much theory if they’re willing to start a catfight with me about my helping a college student do her homework on a first date.

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  141. on October 28, 2010 at 8:54 am almost 40 year old virgin

    Interesting observations and self-examination there Mr.Collard.
    Though one doesn´t have to be a borderline mental case(nothing personal) to not wanting to have anything to do with a female person.

    In fact this way of living is well known and was even applauded throughout all of human history. Only our recent western sex-maniac “culture” has elevated the worship of pussy to it´s current ridiculous level.
    Something even an analytical male such as yourself is obviously unable to escape.

    People like our esteemed Roissy on the other hand..

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  142. […] one conversation where it’s perfectly ok to give in to the girl since normally you’d never want to do that. Two strategies I’ve used successfully in the past are to keep a folder on my computer with […]

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  143. Jerry,

    I don’t know much about autism of any kind. But I can imagine that game would be extremely frustrating for someone who could not instinctively grasp the “art” part of the art/science that is game. The science part can be studied and deduced, but the art has to be repeatedly practiced, as does any art, and most of the “learning” is outside our conscious monitoring.

    Learning calibration, for example, isn’t really a conscious process — it’s getting a “feel” for the thousands of little microcommunications that happen in facial expression, body movement and posture, tone of voice, timing, etc. The rational part of our brain can’t consciously process all of these calculations, any more than a violinist’s consciousness can process all of the ear/muscle/mind coordination that results in a brilliant performance. You never really “know” how you know what you know. By practicing, you just get it. Or you don’t.

    And understanding something like “vulnerability game”? Sure, it seems like a contradiction of game’s alpha-male principles. But it’s not. But I couldn’t tell an autistic person why.

    Still, I find that the biggest category of men who say game doesn’t work are those who have not truly given it a shot. Most just try to poison the well with their prejudices and imagined scenarios so that they can make themselves feel that they don’t HAVE to give it a shot. Practicing game takes courage, and lack of courage is what keeps most men from even taking step one.

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  144. @Fred

    Good point about game doubters.

    But like the majority of new Amway distributors, some new PUA aspirants will gush for years about the “truth” from the Roissy or Roosh Bible they studied (cherry-picking what they wanted to have been taught).

    By comparison, the doubting Thomases look downright reasonable, even if also wrong.

    Like rigid Pentacostals, blind game devotees can be very annoying when you cross them on an a sacred cow issue.

    On the other thread some cheapskates are seriously implying they would turn down a free lap-dance from a 10 if it meant they had to shell out even $1…and any real Alpha would do the same (they’re not taking a religious moral stance which would be a different type of debate).

    This is taking game advice way too literally with no sense of nuance, exception, context or relaxing and enjoying life in different situations on different days.

    Like


  145. on October 28, 2010 at 4:32 pm Herbal Essence

    I do this with women constantly, and I’m not even interested in sexing with any of them. I do it because women are absolutely insufferable bores, and I have to tease them to keep myself from falling asleep.

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  146. I did not say that “the advice is unsound because thousands of conversations with people are less rigorous than conducting experiments on the Universe,” though I believe this is so.

    And I never said “game” does not work, though I have yet to see anything that looks like a definition of “success” which would allow someone who did want to study this to effectively analyze it.

    Instead I asked people who said they had evidence to support their claims to show it to me. If no one has any beyond anecdotes and personal observations just say so, but this means there is no scientific basis for the evolutionary psychology claims often made here.

    In the end my claim is that PUAs use scripted techniques that doubtless work on some women in some contexts sometimes, but have nothing to do with activating the female evolutionary attraction psychology. This is so because human beings have agency beyond their biology and are not slaves to their limbic systems.

    My old man died at 62 and was found by his 24-year-old 9.5 girlfriend, and I seem to have inherited his abilities. Neither of us ever studied game–we just learned to understand women as individuals and did our best to find mutual satisfaction with them. Based on my experience–as empirical as anything you guys have observed–this works better than any technique Roosh or Roissy ever taught anyone.

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  147. on October 28, 2010 at 7:16 pm David Collard

    R S S

    “In the end my claim is that PUAs use scripted techniques that doubtless work on some women in some contexts sometimes, but have nothing to do with activating the female evolutionary attraction psychology. This is so because human beings have agency beyond their biology and are not slaves to their limbic systems.”

    This seems internally inconsistent. Are you saying that Roissy theory doesn’t work because it isn’t good evol psych, or because humans are more than their evol psych instincts? I think it does work for evol psych reasons but of course some people can exercise good self-control and resist their impulses.

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  148. on October 28, 2010 at 7:44 pm David Collard

    Fred:

    “Practicing game takes courage, and lack of courage is what keeps most men from even taking step one.”

    Practising game even in a marriage takes courage. Try ignoring a ranting woman, or keeping your cool when she has become hysterial. It takes guts. The rewards are great. But it takes real courage.

    Putting it another way, being an effective husband is worth it, but it is damn hard work.

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  149. Good question, Mr. Collard, but again I did not say that PUA techniques don’t work. They do in fact work at the margins, simply because some women exercise their agency by choosing men who use them. Perhaps they have the same desire for casual sex, and use an identifiable script as a cue that the man is interested in hooking up. In any event they have made a choice–evolutionary imperatives do not drive whatever train causes women to respond to these cues.

    Roissy, and many of the commenters here disagree, and sometimes claim that science supports their view, but can’t seem to show any research beyond “It worked for me.” In any event you yourself say the same thing I’m saying in a different way: “…some people can exercise good self-control and resist their impulses.”

    And if you have to actively worry about ways to game your wife, then being a husband could be “damn hard work.” I don’t find it so, but that’s because I don’t have to game my wife–I just behave as I always have.

    But then, I didn’t have to “game” her to win her, either.

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  150. […] — Good Examples Of Readers Passing Shit Tests, Teasing Should Be Like Breathing, Belittle […]

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  151. RSS,

    It appears you are not familiar enough with the literature on game to have formed an educated opinion. If you were, you’d know that your situation is accounted for by virtually all the major teachers of game. You are a “natural.” You do what comes naturally, and it works.

    But the majority of men do not have this attribute. When THEY do what comes naturally, they usually fail. Game teaches these non-naturals principles and techniques that give them a much higher success rate in their interactions with women. Some of these techniques are probably things you do without even realizing you are doing them.

    Providing iron-clad proof of any conclusion reached in the social sciences is difficult. Providing the proof you are asking for (not only does the phenomenon occur, but we can be certain that the responses observed relate directly to evo-psych principles A, B C…) is virtually impossible. You are engaging in the “raising the bar” fallacy, refusing to be persuaded unless some unattainable level of proof is handed to you.

    The most persuasive evidence for game is this: Try it and see if it works. But you are immune from this evidence, because you are already successful with women. You need to accept that even if game does work, you cannot experience the kind of proof that most men can.

    Like


  152. on October 30, 2010 at 8:13 am puerto mexico

    why do you include so often the obvious caveats for your advice?

    Like


  153. Jerry

    Like rigid Pentacostals, blind game devotees can be very annoying when you cross them on an a sacred cow issue.

    You made the good point a few too many times, and I can understand why. It is irritating and frustrating to debate game theory with people who show no signs that they are even in the game.

    Although you are my senior, perhaps you haven’t had as much time writing on blogs to learn the difficult art of concision. It does take more time to be brief.

    Social interaction is a fluid dynamic, and we draw on personal styles and strengths. Game points to a few contradictory methods of pushing attraction triggers. Like you, I like to point out that the main triggers that game usually talks about do not contain the full palate. An artist will experiment and have success with new forms, and create his own unique, fluid, evolving style.

    Yes, the bait and switch and the beta attractiveness triggers are essential to game.

    Like


  154. […] – “America’s Future Soldiers are Unfit for Duty“, “Teasing Should be Like Breathing“, “Marie Claire Blogger Spills Truth, Fatties Erupt on Cue“, “Female Beauty […]

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  155. Chateau said:
    “man oh man alive there are some numbskulls on this board.”

    “on this board“? I guess The G Manifesto isn’t the only one who unironically reverts to Bush 41-era slang.

    Chateau, you are a point of light!

    Like


  156. aww yeah yes thats right

    (.. did that sound like sex? I mean I agree)

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  157. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Aaron Whim, 5.0. 5.0 said: Awesome article about teasing by @citizenrenegade http://tinyurl.com/3yvvesv […]

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  158. For some women, I’ve noticed I’ve just been insulting the crap out of them. In a friendly way of course. The girl I was talking to last night asked me why I was so mean, and I told her it was my natural persona. And then I asked her if she would rather have me smother her with compliments and said something like, “you are the SUN!” she laughed and I continued telling her she was short and should stop shopping at Forever 21.

    Like