mood music

you’ve got her back at your place.  light dimmer pre-adjusted before you left for the night to

loooooooooooooow.  (you’re a good boy scout.  always prepared.)

bowl of chocolate covered strawberries on the coffee table.  you hand her some matches and ask her to help you light the candles.

(good job, son!  you know doing little things together increases her investment in you.  now she’s less likely to put up last minute resistance.)

you tell her to make herself comfortable.  you slip in a CD.  keep that volume at lubrication level, cowboy!  right around 3 is perfect.

it’s your go-to album for these extra special moments.  the first melodic frequencies reach out from the speakers and slowly unbotton her jeans.  oh yeah, nothing sets the sexy mood quite like this:


  1. Yeah man, you can’t go wrong with that one. But personally, I prefer “Welcome Home (Sanitarium)” followed up with “Seek & Destroy.”


  2. I dunno. Worked for me.


  3. damn… back when metallica really mattered. or at least left an imprint on my soul.

    ‘call of ktulu’ might rock… of course, you really don’t want her thinking ‘struggle within’ for the rest of the night. heh.

    i’m on the turbonegro kick though. if the girl knows how to get down to them, then she’s a-okay by me.


  4. Blockhead – “Music by Cavelight” entire LP. I’m adamant about this. It’s straight panty lube.


  5. wow that gets me wet just after the intro.


  6. im a sexplosion (my life with the thrill kill kult) kinda girl..
    with a strobe light.. but i guess thats only if i get him back to MY place….


  7. Listening to Master of Puppets reminds me of everything that I love about metal. Listening to The Unforgiven remids me why Ihate what it turned in to.

    Suicide blonde, you just made me want to go home and find “Cooler than Jesus” with that My Life with the Thrill Kill Cult reference.


  8. INPY,

    Hey now, what was wrong with Unforgiven?


  9. Metallica lost so much of their visceral appeal after Bob Rock came onboard to produce, a relationship that started back in ’91 with the Black Album. I believe he even played bass for them on the St. Anger album.

    I’ve never met a female fan of Metallica’s early work free of STD’s.


  10. VK; nothing’s wrong with it…if Phil Collins is singing it. It just doesn’t fit Metallica. And I’m sorry, but this band is supposed to be better than “there’s a wounded little child in me” whining. These are the guys that did “One” “Battery” “Damage Inc” …

    There’s no crying in Metallica.


  11. Back in the day when makeout tapes were actual, inside a cassette tapes, my personal fave was always Jimi Hendrix’s Band Of Gypsies. A definite pants-unbuckler and managed to be popular with pretty much every imaginable subclique of chick on campus, from the bimbo-blond sorority skank to the all-black art dyke.

    VK, the entire Black album was the beginning of the end. Metallica deserved it when Napster sent them starving and bankrupt into the streets.


  12. Jewcano,

    ha ha ha ha ha ha ha aight, true


  13. for the really uptight girls i play GWAR.


  14. The black album was a definite break point amongst Metallica fans. Pretty much you either like the stuff before or after, with some overlap on the black album itself.

    Nobody liked St. Anger, and it didn’t help that the sound engineer should have been shot for how the drums sounded.

    Not being a fan of early Metallica myself, I wonder what anybody thought of the Down “NOLA” album. (It’s a little more Sabbath-y, just replacing satanic references with weed ones.)

    The Hendrix thing sounds like it could work. Overall, Hendrix had very free guitar artistry over a solid, visceral canvas. A very wide appeal, yet underplayed.