Slap a ho!
I keed I keed. But you should do the verbal equivalent of a firm pimp slap. A reader emails,
Here’s a topic you haven’t covered directly: how do you handle a girl who reprimands you? You had a post on handling bad behavior that was focused more on text game and flakiness, but here is the situation I ran into:
I met a gruff but attractive 20-yo EE girl when visiting western Europe (I’m 30). We took a cab and in this country it’s not common to tip the driver, or they round up to the nearest euro. I paid and the guy was taking his sweet time returning my change (~2 euro). The girl sternly rebuked me for not letting him keep the change as she felt the amount was small. Now set aside that I don’t appreciate being called cheap when I’m the one paying for the taxi ride, and that she may or may not have been correct, how should I have handled this?
I just ignored her which I think is not the best way to deal with her lecturing me like a child. But even in retrospect I can’t figure out anything much better. Thoughts?
She sounds like an ingrate cunt. Be that as it may, she could still be fuckable. So you want to know how you could have maintained an alpha male frame under her withering impugning of your manhood. (Calling a man cheap is like calling a woman ugly. The thermal exhaust ports are different in men and women.)
Glad you came here! First, a question. Did the girl scold you in front of the taxi driver? Because that’s worse than if she had saved a time later to express her displeasure. Dressing you down in the driver’s company means she wanted to enlist an ally to her cause. This is unacceptable behavior, even from a hottie.
If she did it in front of the driver, the best lesson is one that steals her script and “volunteers” the driver as an unwilling third party to ostracize and embarrass her. Instead of addressing her, you turn to the driver and say with mock revelation,
“Hey, dude, she wants to give you an extra 5 euro. I think she likes you!”
Boom. Script flipped. Frame dynamited. Now she’s sitting there flustered and wondering how the hell she got into this mess and why it’s suddenly feeling so hot. Humor and insouciance is social judo; you have used the thrust of her parry against her.
Rule number one when dealing with women attempting a coup d’cast out: Convert her potential allies before she does.
All women are predisposed to win social battles by enlisting the aid of neutral parties. Women “win” when they have won the sympathies of the herd. To defeat this female prerogative, you must prevent her from acquiring those allies. And that means getting to them first. No matter the details of the dispute, when the herd is turned against a woman, she will surrender her beachhead faster than the Rotherham council of elders surrendered their district to Pakistani sex slave groomers. (Never too soon at CH.)
A similar dynamic is in evidence when you turn the crowd against an “AMOG”, and there are a slew of Youtube videos showing Tyler from RSD doing just this. Spergs have a hard time understanding this law of human nature: You never win heat-of-the-moment hierarchical maneuverings with appeals to logic; you win with appeals to the crowd’s emotional perceptions.
BUT, if she waited till later to chide you privately, then you have to take a different tack. Ignoring her isn’t going to cut the mustard when she’s ego-stabbed you front and square. You’ll need a strategy I call Allay & Flay.
The formula is simple: She reprimands you, you initially posture as if her point is worthy of consideration, and then you unsheathe your shiv.
HER: “Why didn’t you let the taxi driver keep the change?”
LUCIFER’S IDOL: “Hm. Good question…. [pregnant pause]… Next time I’ll leave more. I like it when a girl keeps tabs on my money.”
The key here is the reframe. You’ve moved the topic from your cheapness to her obsession with your money. This is an attack few women will successfully counter. She’ll fold into the defensive crouch like a cheap lawn chair. “I don’t keep tabs on your money!” “What are you trying to say?!” “Are you calling me a golddigger?!”
To any of these butthurt replies, a mighty hammer blow of righteousness will close the subject.
“How about this. From now on, if I’m making the financial decisions you keep your opinion to yourself. If you don’t like it…”
Then you motion to the open air with your outstretched arm. Or to the door if you’re indoors.
You have to mean it, otherwise she’ll sense your tentativeness and eat you alive. A firm frame that strongly communicates a take-her-or-leave-her attitude will either rid you of a nagging headache, or earn you an enamored lover.