An Eye Contact Crib Sheet

Eye contact from women is usually the first cue that men who aren’t cut out for cold approaches rely on when deciding whether to initiate a courtship salvo. The disadvantage of waiting for eye contact before making a move is, naturally, the waiting. You’ll never cross the finish line if the starter gun doesn’t go off. The advantage of relying on eye contact authorization from women is the efficiency of only chatting up girls who have ocularly indicated a willingness to be chatted up by you. Plus, eye contact is one of those proto-sexytime signals that can be deduced from a distance, and in various locales. You can catch a woman’s eye on the sidewalk as easily as at a bar or a boardroom.

If eye contact is a must before you’ll consider talking to a random girl, then this post will help you identify your choicest targets. Did you know that people have autonomic eye movements which operate at the subconscious level, and which differ according to contextual inputs?

The rules of eye contact are simple. After catching her eye:

  • If she looks down: She’s instantly attracted but shy.

Approach this girl, but go easy on the cocky jerkboy game. She’s a natural introvert, and a romantic at heart. Don’t come on too strong. A light touch will do, flirty and coy. She’ll just be happy you even had the balls to escort her from her dreamy inner sanctum.

  • If she looks to the side: She’s not instantly attracted.

You will have your work cut out for you on this girl. A side-looker is as good as (or bad as, depending on your perspective) a cold approach on a girl who hasn’t noticed you. The side-looker has a boyfriend, or she doesn’t like your look or your leer, or she’s a manjawed feminist who is constitutionally incapable of flirting with men without having an existential moral crisis. You can turn a girl like this around, but it will mean you have to be exceptionally bold and full of teasing and negs. An effective opener would be one that immediately disqualifies her, flips the script, and assumes the sale. For example, “I caught you checking me out. Don’t worry, even though it’s nothing new, I’m still flattered.”

  • If she holds eye contact intensely: She’s instantly attracted and slutty.

Weaker men wilt under the pressure of the hard-eye contact girl. She’s dripping sex from her limpid orbs, and only men made of sterner stuff will rise to her fightin’ iris challenge. Nothing much needed here but an open-faced “Hi” and a pretext to absolve her nascent feelings of aggressive sluttitude (such as asking her for directions if you cross her path on a street corner). A direct, “Hey, I noticed you from across the room, and had to come over and see what your deal is”, will work in any bar setting. Ovulating women are often intense eye contact machines, and will lock on any man who has the right “look” for her fired-up womb. (This look encompasses not just physical traits, but body language and fashion sense.)

Strangely, I have yet to make eye contact with a girl who reacted by looking upward. If I do, I’ll assume she’s a nun. Or already on her knees in front of me.


As readers have probably noticed, this post was mistakenly titled “An eye contact crib shit”. It has since been corrected. 😆 I keel myself!


  1. on October 6, 2015 at 2:25 pm mendozatorres

    There’s a married woman or two here at work that give me the long stares. I always make them look away first.


    • Probably my wife.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Reminds me of a funny story. I am writing the “cold call” chapter of my ebook on how to use pua techniques in the boardroom. One time some gal at work had been eye-ballin’ me for quite some time so I looked up her number in the phone book and called to ask her out. She said “I don’t think so” and hung up. When I related the incident to a colleague he said “what balls”.


      • on October 6, 2015 at 3:27 pm Captain Obvious

        Elmer, not to dis your book or anything, but Betas ask questions, whereas Alphas issue commands. Next time, instead of calling her to ask, send her a TXT such as “Put your hand under the table and slide your fingers into your panties and touch yourself until you start sweating and I can smell your femininity from over here.”


      • ” Betas ask questions”

        True. But in my defense I said “let’s go for a walk during lunch sometime”.

        And nobody “texted” back then.


      • Elmer, not to dis your book or anything, but Betas ask questions, whereas Alphas issue commands. Next time, instead of calling her to ask, send her a TXT such as “Put your hand under the table and slide your fingers into your panties and touch yourself until you start sweating and I can smell your femininity from over here.”

        Yeah, or just hit a random female visitor in the head and then fuck her on the floor in the office, and all the betas will be like “he so Alpha!” and cower in the corner while the boss begs the Alpha to take his job, and all the cool guys will yawn and log on to Heartiste and post about it in a detached way ’cause that’s so ordinary in their lives. Just another Tuesday.


      • “Put your hand under the table and slide your fingers into your panties and touch yourself until you start sweating and I can smell your femininity from over here.”

        In a social context, sure. However, that would not go over well with unreciprocated interest in a work situation. Don’t try that at the office tomorrow, kids.


      • Good Lord. Yeah, and enjoy the visit to HR with mandatatory sexual harassment counseling (if lucky) and firing (if not).


      • on October 7, 2015 at 10:36 am Captain Obvious

        Mordecai, we’ll teach you how to dip it in that sweet, sweet [email protected] virginal Black Hat p00ntang. You know her husband is a coward who refuses to stand and fight for The Nation…


    • on October 6, 2015 at 9:27 pm Harcourt Mudd

      Reminds me of a time at a striptease establishment not long ago. A woman was there with a huge ring on her finger and a guy (couldn’t tell at first if the guy was with her or her drunk friend) and she was making intense and frequent eye contact. At some point the man leaves (I have no interest in getting shot, or dishonoring the man in front of his woman) but I gesture to her “Are you with him?” She acknowledged and after that she still glanced but less so. I was glad enough for the eye contact without getting involved with the situation but I wanted to confirm that a woman who was with her man couldn’t take her eyes off me.


    • on October 7, 2015 at 8:15 am Laguna Beach Fogey

      Go for it brah. I get that all the time. I’m sporting a bright blond beard and I think that’s what initially attracts them. Bold vixens.


      • on October 7, 2015 at 1:52 pm Harcourt Mudd

        Are you telling me to go for it? I would have if she were alone but he wasn’t gone that long and I have no wish to get myself blacklisted from the place if a fight breaks out. I did miss the “game” aspect that I didn’t get to finish.

        I won’t pretend it isn’t largely for the ego boost but it’s also like being an aristocratic warrior and going on the hunt to stay “in shape” for war. Everything from my alertness to my pride and my libido suffer when I’m not at least in penile-reach of a variety of women, even if I don’t actually consummate it.


      • on October 7, 2015 at 6:14 pm mendozatorres

        Right on! Funny you say that as Monday, some boldness was on display.


    • i get stared at and approach…it doesn’t go as well as you would expect given the stare length. In fact, there have been times when they reacted to the approach with outright hostility. Then there are the women who get too tongue-tied to even speak. They go beet red and can’t form sentences.


    • on October 6, 2015 at 3:22 pm Captain Obvious

      Any 21st Century discussion of “Eye Contact” has got to address the phenomenon of “Blank Stare” [unblinking eyes, and whites showing too large, especially beneath the iris], which is becoming rampant amongst the sub-25ish females for whom video game addiction and then iPhag addiction were essentially their mother’s milk of pasttimes as they were growing up. Originally I thought that “Blank Stare” might be associated with e.g. Benzodiazepine use, but now I’m wondering whether “Blank Stare” actually comes from staring at the [email protected] iPhag 24×7.


      • “now I’m wondering whether “Blank Stare” actually comes from staring at the [email protected] iPhag 24×7.”

        not an unreasonable theory. our daily activities do impact the mind and body. i think it’s clear that spending hours a day using electronics has an impact on a person’s mental state. lower attention span, greater need for stimulus to maintain interest in subject matter, etc. these young people are truly in a state of addiction.

        but it’s not just the mind. it’s also likely have an impact on the structure of eye and upper body as they sit hunched over staring at screens all day. research would probably reveal that most young people today have limited peripheral vision. low rates of visual response to anything that isn’t loud, bright, fast, etc. and they are on the road to becoming hunchbacks in old age.


      • This is called “sanpaku”.


      • interesting. just read the wikipedia article on sanpaku. definitely not a good thing to have. there’s a list of famous people who have had the condition and they didn’t exactly have charmed lives that’s for sure.


  2. Speaking of eye contact, Ft. Collins Co will vote on whether to allow women to go “topless”. Only the hottest women will show off their perfect tits, amirite?


      • on October 6, 2015 at 3:51 pm Captain Obvious

        Elmer, my gut instinct is not to hate that crazy [email protected] witch, but rather to feel a terrible sense of tragedy when beholding the horrifying spectacle of her. 50 years ago, she would have been a stay-at-home Mom, married to a “Greatest Generation” husband, whom she adored, and they’d have a house full of Baby Boomer children, the oldest of which would be about to head off to college. But in 2015, she’s just another left-of-the-bell-curve at-risk chick, who fell under the spell of Eskimo Psychiatric Nihilism, and now she’ll never re-emerge from The Darkness: Nothing Good or productive or constructive or positive or hopeful will ever come from what remains of her Life on this earth.


      • on October 6, 2015 at 5:31 pm Diversity Is Good

        Looks like the Boulder freak show has crept north a bit…


      • on October 6, 2015 at 5:35 pm Diversity Is Good

        Why would someone obviously coming off of chemotherapy want to stand in the sun holding up a sign?


      • “Illegal to remove”? More like a crime against humanity to remove


      • Illegal, perhaps… but certainly unadvisable.


      • That’s Irvine Welsh. Tell him to fuck off back to Muirhouse.


  3. […] An Eye Contact Crib Shit […]


  4. That reminds me: Once at an after-party at a friend’s place I told a group a joke, making them laugh, and afterward there was this girl who kept smiling broadly and making eye contact with me. I looked at her with the same broad smile, and then blinked as slowly as possible. I had the idea that she would know that’s what cats do to indicate friendship when a cat or person stares at them, and maybe she’d do it back.

    That got a surprised laugh from her and she said, “I can’t do that.” Which surprised me, I thought everyone could do that naturally. Then I told her to try it, but she failed and it just made her laugh that we were looking at each other intently like that. We were all pretty buzzed. Well, there are all kinds of openers.


    • on October 6, 2015 at 3:54 pm Captain Obvious

      > “I can’t do that.” ——— Arbiter, this might be part and parcel of “Blank Stare”. Lately I have been talking to these sub-25ish chicks who simply cannot blink their eyes. I had originally thought that it was due to Benzodiazepine use/abuse, but now I’m wondering whether it comes from staring at the iPhag all day long.


      • You are talking to women who can’t blink – are they in the hospital?

        Plus points for attaching it to Social Media Ruined Today’s Women, one of the Common Talking Points. Or could it be that she Rode The Cock Carousel in the gym, where everyone is hooking up and having orgies?

        No, it’s simply a fact that some people cannot blink slowly, the reflex makes their eyelids close fast.


      • on October 6, 2015 at 6:14 pm Captain Obvious

        Arbiter, this is something new. From my youthishness, I can remember one chick in high school who wore contact lenses and had trouble blinking her eyes, and I knew one crazy [yeah, redundant] Eskimo-ess chick in grad school who would get right up in your face and stare right into your eyes and I asked the older dudes about it, and they said that she does it to all the guys. But now I’m seeing it everywhere. Lena Dungheap does it to a certain extent, and it could be a JYC Eskimoess affectation which is being foisted upon the culture at large, but my money is on Benzodiazepines and/or iPhag addiction.


      • on October 6, 2015 at 6:17 pm Captain Obvious

        “A growing number of teens and young adults are being prescribed antipsychotics, a new study suggests. In particular, it appears they’re being used to treat attention deficit and hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) – a condition for which the powerful drugs are not approved.”


      • on October 6, 2015 at 6:23 pm Captain Obvious

        Here’s Lena Dungheap and H!tlery Rotten Cl!tless flashing too much eye-whites at one another:


      • on October 6, 2015 at 6:36 pm Captain Obvious

        And this EVIL ESKIMO WITCH, named Sari Horwitz, was on Greta van Susteren’s show tonight, bragging about how they’re releasing 6000 federal convicts back into the civilian population, and that Eskimo-ess had eyes-too-wide-open:


      • on October 6, 2015 at 6:51 pm Captain Obvious

        My recollection is that the Menendez brothers were allowed to testify before the jury while they were under the influence of a relaxant – maybe a low dose of Demerol? – so that they wouldn’t appear to the jury to be the nervous anxious guilty-as-he11 psychopaths whom they really were. And my guess is that many of these celebs and especially the politicians are doing low doses of something before they make these televised appearances – they all seem to behave like they’re mildly to moderately narked up on some [email protected] substance or another.


      • on October 7, 2015 at 5:58 am Max from Australia

        Captain Obvious “many of these celebs and especially the politicians are doing low doses of something before they make these televised appearances” Many Aussie plollies take prednisolone before speeches its fairly harmless and makes you look and sound bullitproof


      • You’re off your rocker.


      • Geez, Captain Obvious. Not everything has to be about the same political subject – even when other people are talking game, bringing it back to the same. All you’re gonna do that way is put off newcomers. Even the blog owner has asked you to stop this peppering, you should respect his wish.

        You want people to learn about politics – I do too. But you should understand the importance of letting game threads be game threads. You are older as you say, no problem, but if that means you are disinterested of game or don’t have game advice to contribute – then just don’t post. Stick to the political blog posts. There are plenty of them, new ones every day, so you don’t have to put it in a game thread.


      • True, I’ve heard beta blockers are commonly used by public speakers. I’m not a subscriber to ‘better through chemistry’ but look on with a bit of envy at those who augment their life with uppers and downers. Til I remember that Rockefeller deliberately obfusticated the demon possession components of drugs when he had his people rewrite the pharmacological texts.


  5. Only in gay-ass stock photo land do women look upward.

    GoogleImages(“woman looking up”).

    R.Don Steel advises that a sign of interest is when a woman looks down and away.

    Not to brag but all women look to see of I am looking.


    • Googled it – yeah, it looks pretty unnatural.


    • Ahh another reader of the Steele, his stuff is great, but he’s not Young and Cool so people don’t talk about him.

      I think another one of his , I don’t know , but someone said “If she makes eye contact twice, it’s not a mistake.” Very useful, women feel very exposed when they’re looking at guys, at least until they started acting like men hoping for a fistfight. They look so funny swaggering around.


  6. Eye contact crib shit eh


  7. This makes sense. It might be hard to tell the difference between her looking to the side or looking down, especially if she is walking past you.


  8. “Strangely, I have yet to make eye contact with a girl who reacted by looking upward. If I do, I’ll assume she’s a nun…”

    Well she could be silently thanking her lucky stars.


  9. Here’s a good pic of a bitch looking up

    But I digress…


  10. on October 6, 2015 at 4:53 pm The Other Anonymous

    If she holds eye contact intensely – and you act disinterested – she’ll start a jealousy plot …


  11. “fightin’ iris” -I like that.

    Don’t pupils dilate when sexually aroused? I can’t easily discern pupil dilation, which might mean it never happens to girls in my presence. I stare at the eyeballs and lose all concentration. Do you all easily notice pupil dilation?


    • on October 6, 2015 at 5:34 pm Diversity Is Good

      Pupils dilate when someone wants to see more of something or someone. They also dilate in low light, which might explain why high end restaurants use low light, because it leads to people’s pupils expanding.

      Why can’t you see their pupils? Are you not looking long enough, or what?

      The opposite is true, too. An angry woman’s pupils may well tighten down to the size of a head of a pin.


      • I’ve seen a woman’s pupils dilate when she was expressing her anger at me, could that mean it was a shit test?


      • During one protracted session over the tax-office counter the mad old bitch became so personally affronted on behalf of the State by my propositions (purely revenue-related, I must add) that all I can remember now is being fascinated by one pupil opening right up to about the size of an m&m, while the other contracted to a goat-like spot. I think she was spitting slightly as she snarled, too. Chardonnay-rage? (She should have been past all that hormonal stuff, at her estimated age)
        I kept the money, btw.


    • on October 6, 2015 at 6:09 pm FuriousFerret

      All humans are keenly aware of pupil dilation unless they have some type of disorders. It’s a primordial instinct.

      ‘Eye fucking’ is the slang term.


    • yes, absolutely, you can watch it happen. There’s also a moment where you can see the realization dawn on them that they are going to fuck you


      • but how do you know she’s not tripping balls on ayahuasca?


      • on October 7, 2015 at 11:40 am The Spirit Within

        That is a beautiful moment. I know exactly what you mean. Usually she faces you square on, her eyes meet yours and holds the gaze, her face expresses natural calm, and if you’re close enough to see, the pupils go wide. It’s like she’s reached a sense of inner peace and all her innate shit-testing and civilizationally-induced shame just evaporate. What’s left is limbic response.

        Then it’s up to you to guide her.

        You only see this after playing the field for a while, though. And it doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re going to bury the bone. I’ve experienced it with two married women after casually gaming them (married women are great for practicing attraction/comfort stages of game). I didn’t follow through, however, because homewrecker isn’t something I want on my karma.


  12. on October 6, 2015 at 6:14 pm ChunkyMonkey.


    Further to your post,

    That is true, I watched my Father whilst I was growing up supplicate to my hen pecking Mother making his life hell (among other things), and just accepted that was how things were between Men and Women (i.e. Women could do what they wanted, and Men had to supplicate and sooth the most abominable behaviour. The rule in my house when I was growing up, was “you best not upset Mum because there will be hell when your Father gets home”).

    I honestly don’t begrudge or judge other fellas for their success with Women, best of luck to them. I’ve understood for a long time that female attraction is different to male attraction, I just couldn’t work out exactly what it was, and as I found (and as CH explains) Women are not capable of honestly or fully disclosing such things.

    Interestingly, my Sister is pretty cool and she gave me some hints sometimes, for example she saved me making an arse of myself when a girl I dated a couple of times friend zoned me, and my Sister told me not to tolerate that crap (back then I didn’t understand why, nor did my Sister explain, but I trusted her conviction).

    Other people lump the “you should be more successful with Women, because xyz…” thing on me. One of the most embarassing questions I get asked is “Why don’t you have a girlfriend!?”.

    “Incel Giant”, that’s a harsh, but also humurous way of putting things clearly into context, and also the analogy of “learning to speak German”, is an improvement on the rather stark term of “aloof jerk”.

    I think what also coloured my thinking on this, was an article posted by Roosh, were he asserted that Men were “nothing more than clowns to modern Women”. The following paragraph from the article, sums up the thrust of Roosh’s thinking (it’s a very negative, sad, piece to read):

    We are not men in the traditional sense—we are clowns. With our tight game we have to be entertainers who create drama and excitement in a girl’s life, just long enough so that she spreads her legs and makes sexy noises, and even though she did commit such an intimate act with us, she will soon lose interest or simply get bored, and then move on to the next shiny cock that catches her eye. The other side of this coin is that we no longer need women. We don’t need them to maintain our home or cook good meals for us. We don’t need them in an age where having children is no longer important or valued. Whatever natural connection that once existed between the sexes has now been severed.

    Despite this, I would rather play the game, than never have played at all. Plus my balls are damn well near stretching my scrotum.

    It is true that there is nobody who can mine my brain to hold me accountable for previous choices, apart from me. I think the idea of integrity is a very male thing, although I also saw an interesting video authored by Tyler where he explains that Women will perceive a fellow in a certain way, and if he deviates from that expectation, Women will try to shame him back in line with that expectation.

    I’ve started to track down the videos that you’ve suggested, starting with Mystery. Unfortunately I couldn’t find the original lectures, but I have found some recent videos where he’s at a less formal talk, and he ask members of the audience to give examples of how they handle the various stages of attraction (it’s a 3 parter). I’m going to watch this a few times until it sinks in.

    One question before I go, whenever I get chatting to a girl, almost without execption they start rattling on and on about the minutae of their lives (even the more intelligent ones). I find it annoying as well as intensely boring. What’s a good way to stop a girl from doing this, aside from slapping her several times?

    p.s. Thanks for The Who song, I hadn’t heard that one.


  13. again, get me out of moderation rape!


  14. For us older lotharios, not waiting for eye contact is even more vital. The 20-something babes may well be open to the advances of a more mature gent with game, but they are unlikely to eye-fuck him beforehand.


  15. I cringe every time I lock eyes with a girl and look away, or do nothing. I’ve been able to say hi or something similar a few times, but that’s it… Actually an accomplishment for me. It’s really hard to fake abundance or feel like “I’m enough” when it’s been like 5 years since I’ve had sex. Battling the feeling of having dug myself a hole to deep to climb out of is a constant struggle. I know girls want to party and have fun with cool, popular guys and that’s just not me


    • Nice guy nice guy, whatcha gonna do? I’m in a similar boat, and my plan is to read lots of rollo (to work on building self-esteem*frame) maybe buy an approach guide and try and be regular with actually conducting day game. Also my minimum standard is really low as i’m not in it 4 da bang, due to moral convictions. Should be an interesting experiment, and at this stage decent conversation will be a ‘notch’.


  16. Russia doesn’t just have an alpha leader, it has an alpha PR department:


  17. I mention some more stuff in my post about indicators of interest that aren’t generally faked:

    Eye contact can be faked. Pupil dilation cannot.


    • Interesting post. I bet being on the spectrum helps you notice certain little details more so than other guys. Facial expressions, etc.


      • When I concentrate, I can. If I’m not paying attention, I do much worse. I notice social cues late unless I’m focused. What for other people is like a bright neon sign on a dark night is like a candle on a bright sunny day to me. If I’m looking for candles, I can spot them, but if I’m not, cues often come late to my attention. This happens with triggers, too.


      • I like the way you put that. I have contact with a few teen males on the spectrum. Some are late seeing cues yet some can curiously sense moods based on expressions.


    • Hey ASD… Am really fascinated with your account of PUA being on the spectrum. I’m not myself, but have never been good at social cues. I’ve done pretty well for myself despite that, but it takes a lot of mental energy. Here’s the thing though. I have a friend of mine who is also mildly on the spectrum and the dude slays women like you wouldn’t believe. I think its because he is genuinely aloof and it’s like chick crack, but would love your perspective.


      • I dropped a few panties back in my single days, starting at 15 YO. I have always gotten a lot of attention from women. Probably a mixture of aloofness, IDGAF attitude, narcissism (overwhelming confidence), not putting up with 5h1t from women, and maxims from my mom and granny (“Play the field” and “Women are like buses–there’ll be another one along in ten minutes”)


  18. Check for the primate feral attraction signal: A woman will see a man; her eyebrows will rise; she will turn her head to the side and smile.


  19. on October 6, 2015 at 10:40 pm evilwhitemalempire

    “If she looks to the side: She’s not instantly attracted.”
    Not necessarily

    If she looks to the side then she’s probably playing hard to get or she doesn’t want you to think she’s interested.

    Side looking is often feigned indifference.

    I know this firsthand from my high school days.

    I remember more than a few girls that would play this one.

    A girl would be looking at me and then the moment I turned to look at her then her eyes would shift to the side as if she was looking at something else.*

    Often with expressions of contempt that were clearly too ‘over the top’ to be legit (real contempt is far more subtle than the cartoonish “I WASN’T LOOKING AT YOU! HMPPPPH!” on display).

    I remember those times quite well.

    Those same girls would often reach over me (sitting at my desk) instead of around to retrieve a passed note from a classmate (so that I’m nearly buried in her cleavage).

    Grabbing my wrist to check the time (when there’s a wall clock in every classroom).

    Hitting my arm with their ass or their hips when I was holding a book with it.

    Squeezing through a narrow gap in a row of seats (when the adjacent row is a mile wide) such that the top of my free hand (resting on the side of the desk) would momentarily be where a ten speed bicycle seat is when a girl is riding it.

    You get the picture.

    Hardly an indication that they were “as good as (or bad as, depending on your perspective) a cold approach on a girl who hasn’t noticed you.”

    *A common variant (and this one’s a true shit test) is waving and smiling in your direction with the alibi of addressing an acquaintance behind or adjacent to you. We’ve all had that one. But it happens too often to be coincidence. And becomes obvious after a while.)


  20. Well that crushed some of my memories. They always looked to the side for me.


  21. I would be a 50 year-old-virgin is I waited for that. Women tend to look past and through me. I am everyman. Not ugly or handsome enough to be set apart from the herd. I actually like the dynamic. I can usually look pretty directly at women, watch their behavior, how they are reacting to those that approach them without them noticing I am eyeballing them. I don;t look like a guy that is likely to approach them.

    When I do, I am right in under their guard because they looked past me and saw no threat. It is a rush when I make a good open and the girl has this “where did you come from?” look.


    Slightly off topic but tangential.

    I was reading portraiture photo tips once, and a photographer suggested a trick. It is hard to explain, and you have to mug the mirror a bit to get it but I will try.

    You bring your lower eyelids up, slightly. It is kind of a squint, but by leaving the upper lid alone (as best you can) it gives you an open, friendly expression, but the lower lid is what gives one the “twinkle in your eye” in a photograph.

    I don’t understand the optics of it, but it works in person as well.


  22. This is rooted in neuro science. Primary attraction responses. Subconscious stuff. Fascinating.

    -downcast and away is good
    -double take is good
    -initial downcast and away, then a later 2s long stare is an invitation to approach

    Also note that if women give you a look away to the side (not initially attracted) this doesn’t mean she ‘cant’ be attracted to you. Attraction can still be built into her with a good approach, opener and attraction routines. Women weigh more attraction value into attitude than a man’s looks.

    I somewhat disagree that an initial intense long stare is an auto slut tell. I’ll agree that is mostly the case. However sometimes if it’s a subject you’ve seen before and not met, and she is ovulating and you are DHV with preselection, social validation, the intense stare can indicate simply that she’s ready for seduction, by you, as you fit here physical archtype of desire. Infrequent that it’s a lesser slut type but still exisits.

    Typically though a women that is outright with intense ‘slut eye’ is usually lubricated up with booze and is repeating a monthly slut behavior. For women of smv6+ and higher getting laid with drunk slut eye is simply a choice. A simple decision like whether or not to eat at home or go out for dinner.


    • on October 7, 2015 at 6:20 pm mendozatorres

      Good stuff, Ripp. Seen all three, with the double take being the most often, but that third one–had some good moments, but didn’t take the cue to approach.


  23. I usually get the over the shoulder eye flutter, even from girls that are supposedly ‘gay’ unfortunately this usually means they are walking off. 🙂


  24. on October 7, 2015 at 3:15 am jessie pinkman

    I hardly ever have to approach women anymore or concern myself with eye contact.I prefer to “Peacock” with my tattoo arm warmers.Personally,i think tattoos are stupid,i’ll never get permanently inked.Wearing the arm warmers,it’s virtually impossible that a girl wont start up a conversation with you if she sees you wearing them,unless she’s got the personality of a 2-slice toaster.It usually causes them to stare at me,wondering if my “ink” is real or not.When they get closer and see they’re arm warmers,i get the “OMG,these are soooo cool”…It’s game over for them after that.


  25. […] An Eye Contact Crib Sheet | Chateau Heartiste […]


  26. apparently I have confused the first and second, at least now it is corrected. not really sure how anyone found this out, is there some research out there on this?


  27. FR: game can really cheer a dude up even if his own situation is on the rocks. Went jogging this morning and stopped at the coffee shop at the end of my run. Approached the door before this older Asian lady.
    Me as I open the door: Good morning to you!
    Her: Good morning. Doing some jogging huh?
    At this point we enter the store and I notice everyone seems blah and quite, so I up my volume.
    Me: Yeah, haven’t jogged in years though so I’m just got back into it this last month.
    More small talk with the Asian as I say good morning to the black girl taking my order. I pay then turn to the Asian:
    Me: I wonder if Keesha here is gonna smile when I put this dollar into the tip jar.
    I do and she puts the biggest smile on her face. Her coworker giggles – the same one that another coworker ribbed her over as having a new boyfriend (me).
    Me: See it worked.She’s smiling.
    More talk with the Asian. I tell her I’ve dropped 6 pounds in the last two weeks. A 40-ish woman with a bashful, modest look to her is smiling at me and mentions how good that is. I thank her.
    This whole time I’m in state and purposefully injecting life into the place. I am the center of attention. I say have a good day to them both and take a seat outside at one of the tables. Soon, the plain Jane comes out:
    Plain Jane: It is a good day to sit outside isn’t it?
    Me: Indeed. Come join me.
    She wasn’t ready for that I could tell. Eyes look away/
    Plain Jane: How about next time?
    Me: Deal.

    Handled differently, I could have done what 99% of people do when they enter a coffee shop – not say a word other than my order, then leave.
    Game for the win!


    • Too bad it wasn’t Starbucks, or you could have had a ‘conversation about race’ 🙂


    • Sweet…. I enjoy fucking with these types of women, the more demure… it’s easy to be the wolf among the sheep and seriously freak them out. Like you can watch all the game things unfold in 15 minutes, massive attraction, tingle development and then hypergamy. Like you can see her heart rate increasing, her swallowing when you do some kino like brush her neck and ear pointing at an earring or taking her hand and looking at a ring while maintaining eye contact, pupils dilate, labored breathing… and then she is off to the office and a meeting and car pool pick ups…. LOL.

      You understand how a woman will help two killers escape from prison and plan to kill her husband. They just cannot control themselves. Then you go back and realize women are all the same, the 22 YO smokeshow is the same, you just need to bring better game.

      Have fun Newly…


      • Sentient, if you are gaming a waitress in a club, is that night game or what do you call it? It’s not like you have to cold-approach her. Maybe it’s a situation where her ASD goes to sleep because it’s socially Ok for her to approach you (and it therefore is still night game)?

        FR: I chose the waitress and sat in her area because I had been told by a buddy that she gave excellent service. I ordered food within 30 sec of sitting and got the food about 2 min later (excellent service); I told my waitress that I wasn’t drinking because I was dancing (Don’t expect tips!), but she was all still friendly and flirty all night–came back to see me often, leaned against me frequently and hugged me around the shoulder if I took her waist, gave me a 30 sec neck rub, shone her flashlight on her tats as I traced them, etc. I teased her about being a woman–I’d have to have hands on to know for sure. She pointed at her boobs and crotch (saying “Nothing there”) in reply. Flirty in a slutty way. Danced with me, too.

        I chatted her up a bit and gave her a little kino. First time gaming a waitress in a club. We had a great connection going–she was very nonverbal and talked with her hands a lot, which I like. I don’t expect to see her again for a month. I expect that next time I’ll have to reestablish that connection. A great story for my book.


      • @Sentient, yeah it was sweet. Speaking of which, a jogging routine is a good one for any computer/gamer geeks here looking for ways to start gaming. They are probably out of shape, physically and socially anyhow, so they should start jogging. They’ll naturally be out of shape so this routine will be congruent with their state.

        Out of breath geek stops jogging at a hottie: “Damn, will this jogging thing ever get easier!”
        Girl: “I”m sure it will, blah blah, blah.”
        Geek: “Hope so, I’m a gamer geek who decided once and for all to get in shape …and be more social too, so here I am jogging …and talking to you.”
        At that point, normal conversation can happen, or if the geek gets freaked out or the girl blows him off, he can just say, “Gotta go, nice talking to you.”

        I altered that line slightly. Other day, jogged up to a little Asian 7 and put hands on my knees out of breath. Glanced over to her and said, “Starting a conversation with an attractive girl is easier than jogging.” Damn, didn’t notice she had earphones in so took them out and was like, “What was that.” I said, “starting a conversation with an attractive girl is easier than jogging … especially when the girl can’t hear you.” We laughed, the light turned, and I jogged away smiling.” Game is so damn fun.


  28. Eyes? Broads got eyes?


  29. Simple rules – but true. Can testify that.



  30. on October 7, 2015 at 9:31 am Violator Invictus

    CH, there’s one girl in particular I frequently catch looking at me in the gym. I find it difficult to tell if this is her checking me out, looking to see if I’m checking her out, or maybe just taking in the freakshow while I lift. Any advice how to fish for IOIs without having to approach? Also, I’m married. How do you parlay something like this into a side piece?


    • Any advice how to fish for IOIs without having to approach?

      Well you should just open her… ask her to come spot you a sec. then tell her good job – she can be your work out buddy……………….. if she promises not to say anything.

      That said her putting herself in your site line or being proximate to you is an IOI.

      Also, I’m married. How do you parlay something like this into a side piece?

      With an abundance of caution… if you are in the same neighborhood village, town or small city and are known at all by anyone in the community… well you will be found out. Just skip it.

      Otherwise if you don’t care… proceed as normal – Attraction – comfort – rapport and initiate isolate escalate. she is a girl just like your wife.


  31. Couple of nuances on sideways break aways

    Smilers – a lot of the time a girl who breaks off sideways will do an involuntary smile, it’s to herself really, when she has just turned her head away from you. Positive indicator.

    Boom girls – another one, where a girl will snap her head around sharply involuntarily and usually out of context with what she is doing and stare at you for a second with big eyes. If you meet her gaze she will snap her head back with no expression. A raw physical IOI. Boom – you popped on her radar and she can’t help but react. Some of these make me laugh out loud. LOL.

    In either case you still need to work game because these reactions are involuntary and she may not be fully aware of them herself.


    • “Smilers – a lot of the time a girl who breaks off sideways will do an involuntary smile, it’s to herself really, when she has just turned her head away from you. Positive indicator.”

      I discussed this in my previous comment…great minds…. It’s a std. primate signal when we see potential mates. Men do it, too.


  32. on October 7, 2015 at 11:47 am The Spirit Within


    I just counted 40 of 175 responses on the “What We Have Lost” post from the sockpuppet calling himself Captain Obvious/Captain Tautological/Obviously Captain/Zombie Shane.

    The guy’s obviously off his rocker. I dig what some of the other people have to say in these comments (game-wise) and having to scroll past his ramblings makes it difficult to find them.

    You’re cool with him hijacking this place?

    [CH: captain, you can’t deny that tsw has a point here. you like this place, but you like it so much you are eating the seed corn, if you will, of the comments section. so if you want it to remain a rousing to-and-fro marked by witty repartee then you should try to check yourself before you wreck this dell.]

    Liked by 1 person

  33. If she looks down with dejection when you say “put away the toys, it’s ‘bed time’ “, you’re totally in like flynn. and hey, society is totally koo day lah with it, since we definitely don’t live in a ‘one rule for some , and another for the rest of us’ autocracy. Now, anyone know of any wars or construction accidents I can go and die in?


  34. Or these indicators could be signs of fear or revulsion. The boundary between hate and love treads close together. I’ve approached women who gave what I thought was strong eye contact only to be rebuffed or frightened off. White, Indian, Asian…the results were the same

    [CH: if you’re eliciting fear in women, that’s not such a bad thing. you can leverage that. if it’s revulsion…. you’ve got your work cut out for you.]


  35. There’s a caveat to the looking to the side variable however, and that is if she is repeatedly looking. In other words, I’ve had a strong correlation between repeated side looks and her being attracted in the same way as her looking at me and then looking down.


  36. Reblogged this on XWorkx.


  37. Wat da hell is all dis? Eye contact. Look down & away is interest from women? Shame? No hijab. Stuffs.


  38. on October 13, 2015 at 1:08 pm Fai (pronounced 'fah-ee'), a diminutive nickname in Thai


    “The rules of eye contact are simple. After catching her eye: If she looks down: She’s instantly attracted but shy.”

    from: OP.

    Dear Chinacel Boy,

    The “look down & away” is odd, I agree. It could be the reaction of a woman who is shy or self-conscious who has accidently made eye contact with a stranger (usually a man, but sometimes a woman or an older child). It could be a reaction of instinctive self-modesty (e.g. similar to women who wear a headscarf, such as the hijab).

    Better indicators of women’s attraction to men (or to women) would be either: (1) simply looking down after having made eye contact or (2) doing so whilst frozen in pose with the mouth open (as if in a state of being stunned by the other person). But as incels have rued in forums like and – all the IOIs in the world mean nothing when both sides are too afraid to approach one another. Sad.


    It is nice to meet a fellow Asian. I’m an Asian girl. You sound like a highschool kid, ha ha. Surely it must be: “white girl or death” (!)

    best wishes,