How To Spot A Charming Loverboy

You know, all these warnings by women about players and their charming ways wouldn’t be necessary if women weren’t instinctively falling for their charms. Think about it. You won’t read too many articles warning women away from boring beta males. Women manage to Heisman those guys all on their own without directives from Cosmo.

Vox notifies,

Take a bow, Heartiste. Once more, science underlines Game:

The article is titled ‘How to Spot a Manipulator’, but it may as well be a truncated game guide for men.

One study tried to determine which personality traits pickup artists, men and women*, share.

The article begins by explaining,

In some ways, pickup artists use traditional tactics that fall into the category of persuasion. Whether it’s yourself or a product you’re trying to sell, you rely on methods of persuasion any time you attempt to influence someone else’s attitudes. You’re hoping that by influencing someone’s positive attitudes toward the item or person you’re promoting, you’ll change that person’s behavior.

Pickup artists have to influence people who have never met them to like them almost immediately. They rely on general strategies that others use to make a good impression, such as seeming attractive, charming, or successful. Unlike a person truly interested in getting involved in a romantic relationship, though, the pickup artist needs merely to look like someone who’s looking for love.  These qualities—being manipulative, self-centered, and insincere—are exactly those that show up in the personality constellation known as the “dark triad” of psychopathy, Machiavellianism, and narcissism.

The HEXACO model of personality structure informs us that Dark Triad people are low on the Honesty-Humility factor. Lemme tell you a leetle something about honesty and humility as pertains to What Women Want™: Honesty is relationship lube, not attraction lube. All else equal, no woman makes the decision to fuck a man because he’s honest. And humility is actually counterproductive to sparking a romance; chicks dig those overconfident men.

Interestingly, they went into the research assuming that, despite the stereotype, women as well as men could fit the criteria—and in fact, the study included plenty of female pickup artists based on the self-reports the team collected.

*Female “pickup artists” are really just cockteases with borderline personality disorder, as you will see this study pretty much confirms. Unlike male pickup artists who are interested in increasing the quantity, quality, or both, of their conquests, female pickup artists are mostly just interested in manipulating a lover or two for incessant ego validation and, when the men she twirls around her fingers are inexperienced betas, for material gain.

In the pilot study that began the project, Jonason and Buss asked 102 participants—all undergraduate students and two-thirds of them female—to describe their experiences with people who had “pursued short-term sexual encounters.” The 71 acts the participants described ranged from abuse (verbal or physical) to avoidance (not returning emails or phone calls). Between these extremes, those who sought to keep their interactions as uninvolved as possible engaged in behaviors such as avoiding non-sexual intimacy (such as hugging), keeping conversations superficial, failing to introduce partners to family and friends, and seeming promiscuous or blatantly announcing that they were only seeking short-term sex.

Lessee… avoiding cuddling and pillow talk… playfully teasing… remaining somewhat mysterious… refusing to relinquish too quickly to expectations of commitment.

Sounds like abundance mentality coupled with Aloof&Indifferent Game. This combo is irresistible to so many women, it’s a wonder more men didn’t evolve the ability to express it naturally. (It’s such a wonder, in fact, that I am tempted to believe there was a time, a long epoch, in our human past, when strong environmental pressures dissuaded women from cleaving to charming players or dissuaded players from openly displaying their talents.)

Male and female pickup artists were equally likely to use the tactics that would keep the relationship from evolving into a one of longer-term intimacy, as well as to seek ways to keep the relationship sexual. However, there were some gender differences: Men were more likely to use violence directed toward their partners, while women were more likely to let a partner know that they were only in the relationship for the sex.

Both sexes use what they know works.

In the all-important personality domain, pickup artists showed specific traits, including antisocial tendencies. As predicted, they were also more likely to be narcissistic. Again, though, male and female pickup artists differed in some aspects of their personality profiles: Women who acted openly promiscuous, for example, were higher in psychopathy. Men high in Machiavellianism were more likely to adopt the tactic of not integrating partners into their lives.

This is interesting. Promiscuous women are, as this study found, CRAZIER than promiscuous men. And our real world observations confirm this. It makes sense. Men are built — some rapscallions would say evolved — for promiscuity, or, at the least, for a tendency to be promiscuous when opportunities arise. Men are thus better equipped, mentally and emotionally, for no-strings-attached sex than are women.

Persuasive charming men — the kind of men women LOVE LOVE LOVE — will manage their promiscuous lifestyles by CARING ENOUGH for their lovers that they don’t lead them too deeply into highly charged emotional and commitment expectations. Heh.

Overall emotional stability also played an important role, but one that differed for men and women: Women who were most likely to engage in keeping the relationship from becoming intimate were also the least emotionally stable. And for women, but not men, self-rated promiscuity was also related to conscientiousness scores.

Again, sex-focused, relationship-averse women are emotionally unstable and self-destructively impulsive in a way that sex-focused, relationship-averse men aren’t. The sexes are different on a fundamental level. Perchance, to deal with it.

So how should women spot a charming loverboy? A short list to start them off:

Telltale behavioral signs

  1. Engaging in unkind acts such as verbal or physical abuse intended to drive you away.
  2. Avoiding physical intimacy other than sexual.
  3. Being unwilling to introduce you to the important people in their lives.
  4. Openly flirting with others in front of you.
  5. Being unavailable and nonresponsive to attempts to maintain or establish contact.

The joke, of course, is that women can spot these signs and it won’t do a lick of good. It’s like asking men to spot the signs of beautiful women so that they can avoid them for low maintenance frumps.

Telltale psychological signs

  1. (for men) Seeming to care only about what you can do for them, not how they can help you. [ed: chicks dig a sexually entitled man.]
  2. (for women) Being late, sloppy, careless, and unconcerned about meeting other people’s expectations.
  3. (for women) Seeming unstable, worried, anxious, and insecure.
  4. (for both) Being highly preoccupied with their own appearance, showing undue self-centeredness, and expressing feelings of entitlement.
  5. (for both) Showing lack of regard for other people’s feelings, not just yours, and expressing lack of remorse for actions in which they caused harm or pain to others.

The few BPD chicks I’ve dated were, without exception, perpetually late and lived in clutter boxes. I knew early on that women who had no interest in keeping up their homes (however humble square-footage-wise) and who preened constantly while simultaneously fretting about their looks (without justification) were basketcases who fucked like champion mares and who would be gone from my life, of their accord or mine, within six months. It’s funny how these female archetypes are universally recognizable. Special little snowflakes, my ass.


  1. Throw another log on the signal fire. Its glow lights up the horizon by now, but some still refuse to get the message.

    At this point, the average frustrated chump who has access to Google but still can’t woo women deserves to be stuck with pudgy older frumps.


    • Hell, I never understood how guys could show up at college as virgins. And that was before soc med exploded. It seems there are plenty of males leaving college as incels. Blows my mind. Will they wake up? Or are they just going to double down and openly join feminism?


      • When red pill real talk is bleating louder than their mothers sisters aunts teachers and government, be a nice guy don’t be a jerk watch yourself men are bad message – well then maybe they will be able to hear it. Until then what are you doing to help a brother out?


  2. Story from Poland reverberates here


    • Having sex with black men is a bad idea, news at 11.


    • Wasn’t patient zero of AIDS fame also a darky who purposefully infected hundreds of men? Some kind of airline steward, if memory serves.


      • French-Canadian. He was a male stewardess for Air Canada.

        I think the epidemiologists now claim he wasn’t patient zero. However, with his access to free airline travel, he no doubt was an early spreader of the disease.


      • French Canadian white fag, who like most fags likes getting butt slammed by darkies.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 6:30 am Whomever Wherever

        > “white fag… getting butt slammed by darkies”

        Yeah, as on the previous thread, that would be a proper penance for Anderson Pooper to pay.


      • Yeah, as on the previous thread, that would be a proper penance for Anderson Pooper to pay.

        Not sure it would be a penance in his case.


    • Poles are stupid for letting negroes in,but I hope they have learned their lesson (just hope).I am from Ukraine and I must admit the corrupt Ukrainian migration authorities don’t give a fuck about negroes in the country.There is a proper ghetto now in a part of Kiev,populated by Nigerians.
      Not only negroes.Take roosh.Why does ukrainian border force lets that unemployed camel shagger into the country without asking questions I don’t know.

      In 20 years Ukraine or Poland will be like the UK today.


  3. There is a lot to unwrap here. Firstly, what does it mean to use violence with women in this case? Surely that can’t mean walking up to a woman and saying that if she doesn’t give you her number right then and there you would beat her, right?… because if it were that easy… Secondly, it says women like success but I wonder what they actually look for. For example, some things like ultra expensive designer brand clothing are incredibly tacky yet people buy them because they think it ups their status. It is really a lifestyle, those who flaunt it and those who play it down but it is easy to spot the difference. Can women? Lastly, I still think men and women are monogamous on a large scale so abundance mentality seems unnatural, it is also kind of gimmicky. But really this is incredibly fascinating.


    • @Martin

      Women seek not only tangible signs of success like clothes cars house decorum etc. But also intangibles chiefly dynamism. Alpha equels a bias for action and a guy with a dynamic personality will resonate alpha quality to a woman. So you see quality women with poor but dynamic and passionate guys… Artists musicians surfers writers actors guys starting up their own businesses etc. A women wants to latch on to a guy “going somewhere”…. You just have to have the right attitude and they will jump on it.

      So much divorce is because women were fooled by the tangible signs of success and concluded that they were because the guy was alpha, when really he was just successful.

      You see the same thing in pick up the paper alpha guys who look good and seem rich yeah they can get a girl to go home with them once in a while but they can’t get her to stick , let alone pursue and Chase him.


      • Interesting. I know some very successful people who are fathers to friends, met in school, or in my family etc, and there is a sort of “sureness” they have about themselves. However, I also know a guy who is a clown, ambitious yet the way he talks himself up to others, always bragging, is a bit grating only he seems to get women to like him a lot. So on the one hand, you have these very successful, ambitious people, who have no interest in proving to others how great they are, and on the other someone who is not as successful but equally ambitious who brags a great deal. The only similarity is the ambition. But I did wonder if constantly talking about yourself, constantly bragging has any affect on women.


      • @martin – Alpha is also authenticity… so the sureness you sense is the authenticity. This is catnip to women. It is not morality – right or wrong in any sense – but that you are who you say you are.

        Because as you rightly note “constantly talking about yourself, constantly bragging” IS attractive to women… and that’s the problem, they fall for the dynamism, but when it isn’t backed up by authenticity, they retreat. hence the paper alpha syndrome – guys who talk a good game but can’t back it up when it counts.

        My Alpha model – dynamic, passionate and authentic. a woman’s dream guy.


    • still in moderation after 2 days?


  4. Pickup artists have to influence people

    This is useful in every walk of life – from business to personal. Too many people make a distinction where there isn’t any. Someone that can influence others will succeed in every aspect of life. It is as simple as that.


    • I discovered this recently. If you want to do a business deal with a woman, you have to game her just like you were trying to pick her up…tingles and comfort. Tingles can be low, but they are required.


      • on December 11, 2014 at 6:55 pm Whomever Wherever

        A grad student with a telephoto lense and access to the dealership’s sales records [and a lot of time on his hands] could record [in a pictorial/video album] and analyze the effects of car salesman Kino on the salesman’s ability to sell to the ladies.

        Also, I wonder whether car salesmen use intentional Negs on their female customers [“Little lady, this here SUV is just too much truck for you…”] and whether they can reverse-psychologize their way into the sale.

        I guess if he had a boom microphone to go with the telephoto lense, the grad student could record the conversations and analyze successful -vs- unsuccesful lines [as far as closing the sale].


      • Buying a car before and after game are two different things. The first car I bought was a Hyundai Elantra GT. I paid full price. Last spring, I bought a used but still very nice BMW X3 for $8,5000. Thanks Game!!! 🙂


      • Oops! Take off a zero. That wouldn’t have been a good deal at all. lol


      • I’m surprised no one has mentioned that women have been using game on men in every single business interaction they are in and can possibly benefit from. Anyone come across a bar tendress , waitress, shop girl, convention booth babe, pr marketing girl etc etc etc who did NOT put her best assets forward and flirt?


    • “This is useful in every walk of life – from business to personal.”

      My career skyrocketed once I internalized the Game concepts I picked up here some years ago.

      The embryonic thought, though, was always there. When very young, I read one of Czeslaw Milosz’s autobiographical works. He talked about his successful stint working in radio and his throwaway line stayed with me: “the key to professional success is to be hard working and impudent.”


  5. on December 11, 2014 at 3:14 pm Whomever Wherever

    > “BPD chicks… lived in clutter boxes… fucked like champion mares…”

    Didn’t we do this within the last year or two – where if you get back to her place and you discover that she’s a total slob, then you know immediately not only that she’s DTF, but that in fact she’s gonna fuck your little balls right off?


    • on December 11, 2014 at 3:25 pm Whomever Wherever

      > “I am tempted to believe there was a time, a long epoch, in our human past, when strong environmental pressures dissuaded women from cleaving to charming players or dissuaded players from openly displaying their talents.”

      We are in the process of a collapse of the culture and a depopulation of the civilized world the likes of which we haven’t seen since Rome was disintegrating and vanishing about 1600 years ago. These are very strange and unsustainable times in which we live, and historical norms may soon reappear with a terrible vengeance.


      • When the demographic group that commits over 80% of all violent crimes in large cities riots, loots, sets buildings on fire and beats up people because they are unhappy with how we treat them for being the group that commits over 80% of all violent crimes in large cities.

        and when the main stream media and the fuck’n President himself side with the criminals

        you know your civilization has started to crumble.

        this will not end well


      • on December 11, 2014 at 5:17 pm Shortest Straw

        Yup. When civilization reaches a certain maturity point: Reproduction becomes optional, both biologically and financially, fertility rates drop. Throw in androgynization and symmetrical individual rights (“equality”) and the incentive to reproduce plummets. The final factor is humans’ struggle between alpha and beta mating – between primitive and pair bonding – which is the subject of this and countless other public ponderings – and you have population disaster. It is epochal.

        Possibly civilization will return to Agricultural Age norms, but that seems unlikely. Without a technical solution, such as surrogate reproduction coupled with robotic nanny parenting, or government run factory farming of humans, the population will die out. We’re the pandas that won’t mate to save our species.


      • on December 11, 2014 at 6:50 pm Shortest Straw

        Yep. Birth control, economic alternatives to parenthood (particularly motherhood), androgynization, symmetrical individual rights, enforced paternity obligations, support of single motherhood, gay rights: All these lead to reduced fertility. Add in the struggles between the alpha and beta mating strategies – primitive and pair bonding sexuality – and you have a simple equation: The more advanced the society, the less fertile. This is exactly what we see in the modern world.

        Civilization could regress to the Agricultural Age – Kings could Return – but that seems unlikely. Rather, the collapse will simply accelerate downward. The more the decline becomes apparent, the faster it goes. The world becomes like urban Detroit.

        Maybe there will be a technological fix, like surrogate parenting and robotic nannies, or maybe government-run factory farming of humans … that seems even more farfetched than returning to the Agricultural Age.


      • A BPD girl is pretty insane, its kind of no coincidence that a lot of guys who end up here on sites like this encountered a BPD girl, they are a step above your usual whore and when the guy gets rocks goes searching.


      • Yup. As societies mature to Industrial Age and Post Industrial Age, numerous irreversible factors come together to drop fertility rates below replacement levels. Not only do people stop making enough babies, they even stop having sex.

        Furthermore, once the decline is perceived, pessimism sets in, dropping fecundity further. Think urban Detroit. We become the pandas that won’t screw to save the species.

        Possibly society will revert to Agricultural Age stability – Kings will Return – but that seems unlikely. Possibly technological fixes, such as robotic nannies or factory farming of human beings, will reverse the population decline. But that seems even less likely.


      • Duplicate comments … sorry … boy do I look like an overeager idiot.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 1:38 am Whomever Wherever

        > “they even stop having sex”

        That’s the scary thing – dudes who whack off to so much internet porn that they just don’t give a shit anymore, and bitches who devote 100% of their energy to going shopping.

        Increasingly it’s not so much that the children aren’t being born as it is that the dadgum fornication isn’t even taking place to begin with.


      • Very little data available on sex frequency. I just found one study citing that men aged 18-50 have 30% less sex than in the 50ies…
        Anyone got more sources on that?


      • Heyjay, I once read a survey saying that in Japan just under 50% of men in their 20s and 30s had had sex at least once in the past year. Another said that the median number of instances of sex for married couples was between 3 and 4 times a year (the average was 17; ravenous newlyweds pushing the average up, but not the median.

        Think about that first one for a minute: it means that the median man, the one right in the middle, the Joe Bauers of Japan, did not have sex even once. A civilization-destroyingly-high number of men are being tossed aside by today’s society.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 9:00 am having a bad day

        @shortest straw

        historically, service economies (post-industrial) collapse into either agricultural (if you’re lucky…) or hunter gatherer/tribes (if you’re not…)…the only time in history that hasn’t happened is now…and that’s only because we haven’t gotten there yet…

        it’s not about the drop in fertility levels (although fertility levels are important for other reasons…). it’s about the increase in demand for resources from non-productive people (service economy), which outruns productive capacity and that causes the collapse…

        and that civilization-building productive capacity is a direct result of social norms virtually guaranteeing every productive beta male a sexual outlet (wife)…and the ability to reproduce (kids). when those norms break down, civilization collapses bc the demand increasingly outstrips production…and the rate of decline goes up…

        it’s just a simple math problem…


      • Hilarious part starts around 3:20


    • Some might say that is why a man needs a wife and a mistress,

      the former will keep the house clean, take good care of the children and may be good in bed ( if you are lucky),

      while the latter is only good for mind blowing crazy sex.


      • on December 11, 2014 at 3:54 pm Whomever Wherever

        > “mind blowing crazy sex”

        The problem is that once you experience the MBC sex, it’s basically impossible to go back to the normal sex. What were the terms – “Alpha Widow” and “BPD Widower”?


      • mistress=miss stress, any woman you fuck for more than six months is going to try to take that shit to the next level and may fuck up all your shit even if she has her own shit going on. Ask General Petraus how it goes down…


      • Disagree. Even MBCS doesn’t compensate for the misery these chicks can cause you.


      • on December 11, 2014 at 5:12 pm Whomever Wherever

        > “Even MBCS doesn’t compensate for the misery these chicks can cause you.”

        Yeah but when you’re young and you don’t know any better, the MBCS is all you think about.


  6. It’s kind of cute the way they keep publishing these little lists.

    In spite of it all, they just can’t help but fall for the charming alphas over and over again.

    Poor things.


    • It amuses me when they post reviews on game books screeching “we’re on to this now, it won’t work any more”.


  7. on December 11, 2014 at 3:52 pm Trapped in Paradise

    HB 6.5 likes me a lot. I mean a LOT. Kind of reminds me of CH’s rule about the ‘true love’ zone being a woman who is about 2 points lower on the SMV scale than that which she perceives her man to be. She’s always asking me ‘where is this going’ and whatnot. I answer with something vague like “I don’t want to stop you from seeing other people.”

    I’ve been caving. Most recently I went to thanksgiving with her and met her parents. Shouldn’t have done that. A week later she asks to be my girlfriend, I give her a noncommittal ‘sure’ but it’s a weak copout of a firm ‘no’ response.

    I think she’s sweet but a bit nerdy and I’m not quite as attracted to her as she is to me. I’m dating other girls ‘behind her back.’

    Oh, and I took her virginity (or so she says).

    Need some advice on how to approach this.


    • Break up with her before you turn her into a crazy chick.


      • Break up with her before YOU turn into a beta. Caving equals betaization. It happens quick. Advise moving away if you are weak in spirit.


    • on December 11, 2014 at 4:04 pm Whomever Wherever

      Need more info in terms of morals, personality, attitude, IQ, quality of her family, etc, before rendering judgement. She must have something going for her if you’ve already allowed her to get her tentacles in so deep.

      Also, if she was so inexperienced before she met you – has she started orgasming reliably for you yet? Much less multiple-orgasming reliably?


      • on December 12, 2014 at 7:23 am Trapped in Paradise

        No, she lost her virginity at age 25 and part of it is that she’s low drive. She’ll still have sex with me any time I want her to, but she orgasms like 50% of the time or less.


      • Low drive is a huge warning sign. Either you are doing it wrong or she is not attracted or it’s hormonal. Poor odds of turning around.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 11:13 am Trapped in Paradise

        Hm, but low drive could also mean that she’s less likely to cheat.


      • Low drive is also a symptom of certain kinds of hormone birth control.


      • @trapped in Paradise – Low drive DOES mean she is less interested in sex. cheating is about more than sex for women, they look for emotional connection and a step up (hypergamy) in addition to sex. so while a low drive MAY slightly lower the chance she would cheat you ARE locking into a situation where you as the higher drive partner will ALWAYS be disappointed with sex frequency and passion… And the first 6 months of a relationship are usually the sexual high water mark.

        In an non open monogamous relationship the low drive partner effectively controls the sex.

        But the fact that you are still thinking LTR about her and rationalizing her faults as positives indicates your betaization is nearing completion. Be afraid my man.

        Only LTR if you want to raise kids.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 2:55 pm Whomever Wherever

        > “Only LTR if you want to raise kids.”

        THIS. And get her to commit very explicitly beforehand as to how many kids she will give you. You don’t want to be hoping for a big family and then she femcunts on you after only one child and refuses to have any more.


    • ^I took her virginity (or so she says).

      Any blood on the sheet? This is good sign that you scored her maidenhead..not every popped cherry produces blood though.


    • Had a friend with similar type of story. He’s married with 2 kids now because he was afraid of hurting her feelings. Worse things could’ve happened. She treats him well and he’s “satisfied” but not what you’d call happy.

      Every once in while you see that ” I coulda been somebody ” look in his eyes.

      I don’t think anyone here can tell you what’s right for you, but I’ll say this; No matter what levels of debauchery and philandering you’re capable of , it’s important to keep a home base. The favorite girl in your harem may not be the best looking one, she’s the one that takes the best care of you.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 6:56 am Trapped in Paradise

        thanks for that perspective Simon. She does treat me really well and loves me more than any other girl has loved me


      • on December 12, 2014 at 7:20 am Trapped in Paradise

        but with that being said, “Satisfied but not happy” is almost a perfect description of how I feel with her.


      • “Satisfied but not happy” is almost a perfect description of how I feel with her.

        to be perfectly honest it sounds like she’s feeling that way about you too. probably satisfied with the companionship, having a boyfriend, etc. but if she’s dealing with a low sex drive this early in the relationship, she’s not as happy as she could be either and it will only get worse as time goes on.

        you’re gonna have to do something to build attraction if you want it to work or cut your losses and move on. settling for satisfied but not happy is a big mistake.


    • The asshole part of me says to use her until she leaves you or gives an ultimatum. The compassionate part of me, says break it off gently because she sounds like a decent kid who doesn’t need to be ruined. The father part of me says you’re a jerk loser asking for nonsense advice out of narcissistic attention-whoring.

      In any event, you’re a man. You know what to do.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 7:05 am Trapped in Paradise

        I feel conflicted too Nomennovum. I read an article earlier this year titled “Mercy Kill” by Nexxxtlevelup ( where he basically takes the compassionate route and breaks it off gently.

        If I do break things off with her, it’ll have to be compassionate. She’s inexperienced with sex and dating at the age of 25 and is subsequently very very easy to game. In 5 months of knowing her she’s only thrown one tantrum and that was semi-justified after I inadvertently made fun of some acne (looking back it was a dick move on my part). I applied a very sparing dose of dread game later that night (“you’re a really sweet person, and I’m kind of mean. Sometimes I forget that…..”) and she became worried that I was going to leave her, came crawling back and apologized for overreacting.

        Sometimes I think the manosphere ruined it for me because if I was still a beta, I would have been more than happy to marry this girl.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 7:14 am Trapped in Paradise

        It has to be compassionate because I care about her too. Sometimes I think the manosphere ruined it for me because if I was a beta, I would have been completely happy and thankful for a girl like this. Now I know I have options…


      • If you were beta you probably would have never got with her in the first place.


    • Similar situation here, basically I view it as a backup girl, train her how you want, and fuck her on the side if you get lonely, and WORST case you can date/marry/dump her years from now.


    • on December 11, 2014 at 8:36 pm Charlie Don't Surf

      Don’t harbor any illusions – she does NOT like you a LOT …

      You’re fulfilling her agenda and as a matter of course – the same that all rudderless LTRs take – you’ll compromise until you’ve become a fully discounted domestic animal life-form.

      Do as Petrucho did in Shakespeare’s Taming of the Shrew. Every sweet thing she says is offensive, talk of eloping to the Elvis Chapel, insist she agree with everything you say – then contradict yourself immediately. Demand ass sex because her pussy is not good enough. Full measures of reverse psychology.

      Why? Because once she’s feeling the swirl of emotions – she happily forget about frog-marching you to the altar. Her pussy will rule her life – and you’ll own that pussy.


      • on December 12, 2014 at 7:19 am Trapped in Paradise

        I’ve thought about this point of view for a while and I’ve been careful not to become supplicating (not sure if it’s really been successful). Because of her inexperience with relationships and dating, she’s been really, really easy to game.

        Once during our 5 months together, she’s thrown a tantrum (the silent treatment “I’m mad at you type”) and it was semi-justified after I ridiculed an acne outbreak. You should have seen the way she came crawling back to me and apologizing after I employed a very sparing dose of dread (“You’re a very sweet person, and I can be kind of mean….”). She became worried that I was breaking up with her and started to apologize to ME for overreacting.


      • @Trapped in Paradise

        “Don’t harbor any illusions – she does NOT like you a LOT … You’re fulfilling her agenda and as a matter of course – the same that all rudderless LTRs take – you’ll compromise until you’ve become a fully discounted domestic animal life-form.”

        to add to this. her low sex drive in such a new relationship is proof of that she doesn’t like you a lot. not in the right way at least.
        you have to think to yourself, why is she so into me? what does she like about me? does she like me because i seem like good provider potential? someone who can who can offer security and companionship. or is she so crazy, passionately in love with me that she can’t keep her hands off me. sounds like it’s the first scenario, not the second. some people will choose the first scenario and think they can build the love and passion. i’ve never seen that work out.

        keep your wits about you man or you will regret it later on down the road. imagine a future with a girl who you will have to constantly game and coerce to get sex. that’s no way to live.


    • You’re realizing you’re getting trapped and it might not be paradise, heh.
      See, even if she’s “inexperienced” she still knows very well how to lead you to fulfill her agenda. She’ll be sweet and supplicating until you said “yes” then the table turns…
      Of course, it’ll always be like that and if you ever want to marry and have children you don’t have much choice.
      So my advice: Screen her! Charm her by playing the understanding guy and dig into her soul to see her true self. Casually drop you’d only marry with a prenup or other machismo views and watch closely her reactions.
      Then decide.


    • “No, she lost her virginity at age 25 and part of it is that she’s low drive. She’ll still have sex with me any time I want her to, but she orgasms like 50% of the time or less.”

      This is a bad sign. If you commit, her drive isn’t going to go up. If anything, it will go further down.


    • Just go throw yourself off a building. Seriously? This fucking guy. You have an above-average girl that you describe as “sweet”, and as absolutely infatuated with you. She (so she says) saves herself for you, is proud of you, wants to show you to her family, and none of that is good enough. Jesus Christ the men of this generation are almost as fucking useless as the women.


    • @Trapped A few things jump out at me from your post that indicate you’re selling yourself short. 1) HB 6.5 Anything less than a 7 is not “HB” but just a girl. You can do better. You have to believe this. For a long while even when I discovered game I was seeking out anyone who would be with me. Sometimes they were hot, sometimes not. It was the product of “practicing” and any success was “success”. This past year I stepped it up. I’m now targeting and banging only HB 7’s who are below 30.

      The second part is the “low drive”. Honestly after the year I’ve had I don’t believe this anymore. Girls aren’t “low drive”. It’s that we as guys don’t game them to bring it out of them.

      I have banged so many girls this year. ALL have been highly sexual. They ebb and flow. They need the stimulation—ie game.

      You’re coming off as “provider” instead of “lover”—meeting her parents.

      I married my ex wife 15 years ago even though she was older than me—an at first lied about her age.

      Fast forward to last week when a girl I’m gaming online lies about her age—says she’s 30 but then admits she’s 27. That’s the kind of lying I like. I banged her so hard she’s now into it.

      Two things to share with you: Inner game: I’d suggest the two “books” that worked for me: Shark’s The Black Flag which you can download for USD$20 and is a great primer with solid advice on how to transform your inner game.

      The second is a bit pricier but well worth it: Krauser’s Daygame Mastery. That changed my life. It’s about “Daygame” but honestly ALL game.

      Read all my posts from 2013 and 2014. Dude I was a fucking mess after my crazy ex gf who WAS an HB9 but at 36 is getting dumpier, slightly bad skin, shit personality. I was the best she could do NOT the other way around.


    • Break up with her before you break her heart.


  8. would love to see CH dissect the studies that refute the science of game – – –

    oh, right, there aren’t any.

    “Persuasive charming men — the kind of men women LOVE LOVE LOVE — will manage their promiscuous lifestyles by CARING ENOUGH for their lovers that they don’t lead them too deeply into highly charged emotional and commitment expectations.”

    hard to walk this line when you’re banging their brains out. maybe the trick is to not be too good in bed so they don’t get attached.

    me slow want quick.


  9. AT joins the parade of channeling CH.

    ‘The object of campus sex rules is not to restore “sexual decorum,” but to ensure minimal restraint on women and maximum restraint on men.’


  10. A couple hours ago I replied to someone’s comment, now both my comment and his comment have vanished…

    I’d like to know,

    is it you CH doing that or is WordPress doing that?


    • on December 12, 2014 at 1:38 pm having a bad day


      that happens to my posts all the time…they usually pop out eventually…i’ve got one stuck to @shortest straw above about the collapse of societies right now. i just figure the betas at the NSA need game advice too…lol…



    DoJ releases new data today . Among the findings…
    ” … rather than one in five female college students becoming victims of sexual assault, the actual rate is 6.1 per 1,000 students, or 0.61 percent.”

    Not that anyone here needs me to tell them that feminists are full of shit, but rape statistics being exaggerated by over 500% and the lie is so often repeated that it’s commonly believed.


    • I can’t breathe


    • on December 11, 2014 at 6:41 pm Shortest Straw

      Mother of God this is huge!


    • the diff stats can probably be explained by different definitions of sexual assault. there’s the sexual assault you suffered when some drunk loser grabs your ass at a frat party. then there’s pyscho killer climbing in your window and holding a knife to your throat while he rapes you. fem stats are probably counting the former. DOJ is probably only counting the latter.


      • on December 11, 2014 at 9:46 pm Shortest Straw

        Not a chance. Take a look at the source material.

        Besides, does 1/200 “real rapes” sound right to you? On a campus of 10,000 students, which is not that huge, that means that there are 50 real rapes a year? That’s one per calendar week!


    • When the remedy (e.g. the “affirmative consent” ridiculousity foisted on college students in California recently) is way out of whack relative to the problem (0.61% is still 2x what a lot of other studies have found), what you get is not a reduction in the problem but an increase in the unintended consequences.

      The UVA article in Rolling Stone is a good example. Expect to see more collateral damage like that as the feminists double-down on the 1-in-4 theme only to watch the soap go flying out the window as they squeeze harder.


      • The affirmative consent nonsense will increase incidents of (false) “rape” because 1) the bar is laughably low to claim rape, and 2) SWJs need more and more rape hysteria to advance their agenda.

        “Sexual assault” reports at Berkeley increased immediately after the CA law was passed. Color me shocked, shocked I say!

        Rest assured no matter what laws get passed, no matter all men do, SJW crowd will claim “rape culture” is worse and worse (ie Berkeley). And the only remedy is more power to SJWs to control/ruin your life.


      • Btw it’s the same thing with “racism” everywhere.

        It’s not about racism. It’s about power.

        These groups will NEVER stop crying “racism” no matter how good it gets for minorities. And 2014 USA is the least racist place on earth for minorities.

        Why? Because they get money, power from it. And it absolves them from taking responsibility for their failed thug culture.

        We have a black president fer chrissakes! No other white country has elected one. How raaaaaciss can we be? Give me a break.

        Gents, the war on men and whites will not stop, ever, without a change to the system.


  12. CH, you write:

    “Sounds like abundance mentality coupled with Aloof&Indifferent Game. This combo is irresistible to so many women, it’s a wonder more men didn’t evolve the ability to express it naturally. (It’s such a wonder, in fact, that I am tempted to believe there was a time, a long epoch, in our human past, when strong environmental pressures dissuaded women from cleaving to charming players or dissuaded players from openly displaying their talents.)”

    My theory is that environmental selective pressures in rising civilizations breed more betas, who after all are the workhorses of any civilization. A society that creates and abides by rule of law, property ownership, and one man one woman marriage will be more efficient and produce more wealth than the neighboring tribes where the men are more predominantly unorganized and infighting alpha cads. The former groups more easily cooperate and with their wealth and technology, and in sufficient numbers, can easily defeat the outsider groups of unorganized alpha cads (think arab tribes in Lawrence of Arabia) and curtail the insider Don Juans. Giving every man a woman ensures more betas breed, rather than give it all to Ghengis Khan, creating more betas.

    Then, when the beta, SJW, manboob population rises to critical levels, the barbarians outside the gates romp in and kill all the betas, thus killing the civilization. This happened around 1177 B.C., around 476 A.D., and certainly appears to be happening now.

    The proof is in the present observation of the less civilized parts of the world, where it is easy to see more men naturally express “Aloof&Indifferent Game” though they are still so far below the civilized places in social dominance that their attitude alone doesn’t YET result in sufficient inroads into the civilized world, though there are increasing breaches of the gates in this regard (Tsarnaev brothers; European teenage girls leaving to join ISIS).

    The trick is, how does the spark of civilization arise in the first place? My theory is, every once in a while, the socially, politically and economically dominant men figure out that if they can impose civilizational behaviors on the whole population, rather than just go full dictator/oligarchy, their society will out-compete all neighboring societies. This entails sharing the women in the short term to gain more power in the long term. The selective pressure for this to happen is a long history of being subjugated by an outside group (e.g., Britannia by Rome) such that being top dictator/oligarch in your particular tribe is no guarantee of safety against the more dominant outside group. The only way out of your subjugation by outsiders is to civilize. Alternatively, you could have two neighboring groups of relatively equal strength, putting selective pressures on each other to civilize and create wealth, resources and technology lest the other get ahead and swoop in (e.g. England and France). The competing groups would have to be separated by some difficult to transgress geographical barrier to give the civilizing society some space to develop, lest the groups just assimilate into one (as Europe seems to be doing now that its geographical barriers are largely obsolete).

    To refute my theory, show me an isolated group that rose to civilization without the selective pressure of a history of outside subjugation or a serious rival next door to compete with. New Guinea? Yanomamo?


  13. do less BPD and less slutty chicks have more of a tendency or ability to be attracted to betas or beta behavior?


    • opposite. BPD’s love betas. they eat souls and crave/thrive on control. beta’s give em their supply.


      • Once again Tilikum tries to score points with some vapid post that is supposed to show he da man. Sounds a lot like a low-IQ nig whenever he manages to type something. His love for Jews and nigs may be more than just leftist leanings, maybe it’s about group loyalty.


    • Betas are screwed. Modern day society is completely against them and exploiting them ruthlessly. It’s kinda ironic in a way. You’d expect these guys would be heavily militating for the old social order but instead most of them are happily promoting and cheering their own cuckoldry and self destruction.


  14. re: BPD chicks and clutter.

    Me and the boys got a saying: Messy house/car, messy pussy.


    • I will not deny what happened. I knew from the start that she was 1. very smart, 2. dangerous in many, many ways, and 3. the only real-life11 that I had yet seen jump naked into my swimming pool.
      I figured that I could afford what it was all going to cost, and so I jumped in after.
      I eventually got clear of it for pennies on the dollar.. She eventually got a provider man.
      That10 years – I would not trade. Or even try to explain to decent people.


  15. Met a foreign girl recently, who is flying out of the country soon, through messaging tells me she’s going through my city and will be at hotel for the night. I say come downtown to chill, she says I won’t feel like it but you can come by airport (hotel). Catch is, she has a friend, who I also met when I first met her … is this a disappointment waiting to happen?


    • Threesome alert.


    • hell no, thats a girl making it easy for ya, handling your logistics for you.

      what would Hank Moody do?


    • Uhhh … Take the hint, buddy.


    • The biggest leap in developing a cad”s mindset (and hence long term success) is changing your thinking from:

      She wants to fuck me?


      She wants to fuck me!


      She wants to fuck me.


      • Haha, yup.


      • Dealing with the 3rd wheel seems to be the only roadblock


      • on December 12, 2014 at 1:34 pm having a bad day


        ‘She wants to fuck me.’…don’t forget the self-satisfied smirk…lol

        @kid twist

        NO third wheel…NO roadblock…just another opportunity…lol…


      • Habd was thinking facial expressions as

        Furrowed brow


        High five grin


        Yawn…. In other news…


      • habd:

        Don’t forget “Take a number.” lol, from an old pussy-teaser.


      • habd:

        Update: The 25 yo HB8 broad who I related to you in the past had been “gay”ing me came up and slung her arm around me (when I was at the club with Mrs. Gamer) as we proceeded to chat, noting that I had been scarce (scarcity game ftw). Of course, my arm was around her shoulders, too. I introduced her to Mrs. Gamer and the broad asked Mrs. Gamer if she could dance with me later, to which Mrs. Gamer assented. After the broad left, Mrs. Gamer asked me to invite the broad back to the table so that Mrs. Gamer could pull her hair out. I proceeded to let the broad know that, although what she did was cool, I would have to dance with her another time and that she ought not return to my table. The broad wasn’t pleased to hear this, of course, lol.


  16. Science confirms game and behavioral sex differences yet again.

    Rape statistics turn out falsified.

    Cases of black/minority crime completely disregarded by the media.

    Meanwhile liberals foaming at the mouth about equality around most of the internet.

    Just another day at the Chateau.


  17. Female pickup artists? God, when will they Stop with their equality at all costs argumentation. They are called sluts. Not pickup artists.


    • Dude, she’s got some serious game! She walked up to this guy, grabbed his dick and led him to the bedroom. Must have taken her years to hone her craft.


  18. “The few BPD chicks I’ve dated were, without exception, perpetually late and lived in clutter boxes. I knew early on that women who had no interest in keeping up their homes (however humble square-footage-wise) and who preened constantly while simultaneously fretting about their looks (without justification) were basketcases who fucked like champion mares and who would be gone from my life, of their accord or mine, within six months. It’s funny how these female archetypes are universally recognizable. Special little snowflakes, my ass.”

    100% accurate with my experiences as well.

    We award these women with the Purple Saguaro of Slurtitude.


  19. OT: black serial killer (in Brazil) systematically targeted white women, got 37 of them over a decade.

    Prediction: Jezebel, Buzz Media, whatever, The Atlantic, New York Times and the rest will create a months-long media frenzy over this violence against women. Months-long, I tell you!


  20. The intersection of BPD and online attention whoring is a scary place. It’s actually interesting to observe the drama on Facebook from a safe distance. It must be a nightmare to be married to these women,


  21. Feminist cunt takes to Reddit’s Feminist page to advertise her abortion.

    All of the personal details for the world to see. Her OMGs and “emotional burnout” reek in her words. It’s such a traumatic incident that she had time to post to the Internet to tell everyone, then updated the initial post twice. The narcissism is sickening. The enablers have provided well over 500 comments.

    Hate to say it, but it’s better that child wasn’t born to such a cunt.


  22. on December 12, 2014 at 8:17 am Amanjaw Marcuntte

    “(It’s such a wonder, in fact, that I am tempted to believe there was a time, a long epoch, in our human past, when strong environmental pressures dissuaded women from cleaving to charming players or dissuaded players from openly displaying their talents.)”

    I’ll take Religion for $1000, Alex.


  23. I have BPD tendencies. I think all girls do. It’s more of a spectrum. But this article seems off. Girl game, blowing hot and cold, being unavailable for periods of time… we don’t do this because we’re trying to keep things casual. It’s the opposite. We’re doing it to keep the man interested in us.

    The girls I know who genuinely want FB relationships don’t play those games at all, because they don’t care. They aren’t BPD, they’re somewhat emotionless. If they’re psychopathic, it’s the “man” type of psychopathy… narcissism without emotion or empathy.


  24. On the subject of why more men don’t naturally act alpha, remember that until recently acting alpha was very physically dangerous. You were likely to get in lots of fights and experience leadership conflict. Sleeping with women without committing to them would on the average make her father and brothers [and suitors or husband] want to kill you.

    Just acting like an alpha wouldn’t be enough. You would need the actual skills, status, and resources to survive and thrive in these situations. This more precisely explains why pre-selection is so powerful. When a woman knows that other women are sleeping with you, she knows (or would have known in earlier societies) you have the skills and status to act this way without someone killing you. Now, loser deadbeats with no meaningful status or skills can act like alphas and other men won’t kill them for it, but female preference has not yet evolved to reflect that.

    Modern society allows men to act the part of alpha without ever having to back it up.


  25. What is the best nickname for a woman?


  26. All men use manipulation to get puss…few know what they are doing…


  27. Mainstream source goes on about “Female PUAs” – lol

    Female PUA in action:

    ‘He’s handsome and muscular and he just said something witty’ – opens legs

    Quite the challenge!


  28. How is being a realtalker and being a charming loverboy compatible? Seems counterproductive. Or is there a fine line to pull this off?


    • Realtalk and a charming loverboy are independent qualities.

      But if you want to be both, then your Real Talk concedes nothing in the way of principle while calibrating itself in accordance with rhetorical effectiveness vis-à-vis your target audience.


  29. @YaReally/ Having a Bad Day and anyone else who wants to chime in.

    The 27 year old I met and banged the other night is up for banging again. She is the one now who initiates the sexualizing texts. I keep it more 50 Shades rather than Penthouse Forum. “Imagine…xyz” “How does it feel when xyz?”

    Second question on the “Soft Next”…The 23 year old actress who bolted on me 6 weeks ago…came out to our weekly dance party and was inviting me to dance by eye contact. I casually ignored her…just basically not reacting to the invite across the room. She was confused, not clear whether I didn’t see her or was ignoring her. After that she was looking away—everywhere but in my direction.

    I was sitting with another girl…a friend of mine and having drinks.

    My thinking now is this: i’m getting banged by so much quality pussy that if a girl wants to re-engage she has to do it in a way that makes her work.

    The 23 year old had previously promised to help me on my project, go to the airport to pick up my guests with me and then go out to some of my events. She never acknowledged any of that. So I see no reason to re-engage until I get some solid active outreach, not a passive social-setting plausibly deniable “I was just asking you to dance” type thing.

    Do I re-engage her or just leave it until she makes the effort I want? Or do I cut her some slack.


  30. Two game questions for yareally, habd, et. al.

    Married broad (MB)–who goes dancing solo–and I dance a lot. Her phone no. is posted on FB. I’m not looking to bang her and have had the not-gonna-bang-ya chat with her. (She’s a possibility for a LTR if bad things happen and we both end up single.) I got bonded last couple of times from dancing with her so much. Moved on. She was a little cunty while I was out of frame and I projected a little neediness (I had some plausible deniability cover, but broads can smell neediness). Last time dancing she asked me to dance and I refused because I needed a rest. After that I actively avoided her. Later she asked again and I refused point blank with a “no thanks” and walked off (so I’m a drama queen, sue me). She persisted, following, asking me if she had done something to offend me. I said I’d rather discuss it outside because I didn’t want other people overhearing what I had to say. She complied, letting herself be isolated. Isolation compliance tested and passed. (We’ve been isolated before, heading out to our cars, chatting.) So we chatted, and she maintained physical contact through the knees. MB reminded me that she was married and said that she is just friends with all these guys. I didn’t respond. MB admitted that I had some points about her disrespecting me in the past.

    I told her I wanted to dance a particular type of dance with her and she was ready to dance with me when the time came. I was chatting up another guy and she came over to me, ready to dance. I didn’t have to look for her. Another compliance test passed.

    MB wanted to work on a move with me that she previously had been resistant to doing. Third compliance test passed. it’s a move that requires me to have my hand on her tummy in order to support her. That takes a fair amount of comfort.

    My first question is “What do all these compliance tests mean?”

    I take it that she enjoys submitting to me and is anxious to please. She brushes her hair back from her face a lot while we chat. I suspect bonding on her side as well due to her willingness to comply with my requests. And her hair-brushing seems to indicate tingles. It seems like her memory of my temporary neediness has been obliterated. Otoh, she also dances a lot with a few other guys, though not as much as with me. MB showed the classic wide-eyes followed by turning her head to the side and grinning, which is the primate response to seeing a potential mating partner.

    Last night I was out dancing and pretty “Polak” woman (her term) hit me with a couple of 5h1t-tests while we were dancing. First was whether I was single (I answered “no”) and 2nd was that I wasn’t wearing my ring. I just shrugged and smiled in response to the 2nd. Although she claimed that she wouldn’t dance with married men, she happily continued dancing with me. So, I wasn’t expecting 5h1t-tests, but blew through those 2 without trying. Is this typical for a natural?


  31. K:

    imagine a future with a girl who you will have to constantly game and coerce to get sex. that’s no way to live.

    Anyone who thinks that they won’t have to game women in a LTR are delusional. See my posts about relationships and bonding sex.


  32. As for avoiding the wrong sort of person, I think that if you are a man, avoid women that man like but woman don’t. If you are a woman, avoid men who women like but men don’t.

    And, a gem from Ben Franklin: “If you want to know a woman’s faults, praise her to her friends.”


  33. […] and learning how to manipulate people’s perceptions and emotions are hardly restricted to romancing the opposite sex. One of my favorite formulations of his was “gaming a ‘You Know Who’ you […]