The Shortest Definition Of Game

Every so often, a new reader (or a veteran cynical reader) will ask, “How would you describe Game in three words or fewer?”

Chateau Heartiste has referred to game as “learned charisma”, or “applied charisma”. I believe this gets about as close as possible to a true definition of game that doesn’t rely on describing techniques as a substitute for explaining the essence of the thing.

But “applied charisma” leaves some readers who are less favorably inclined to abstraction scratching their heads. What is charisma?, they might ask.

As it relates to game and seducing women, charisma is cool. Prepossession. State control. Grace under pressure. Self-regard. Insouciance. Fearlessness. Charm. Freedom. Outcome independence. It’s a take it or leave it attitude wrapped in a cloak of mirth.

Following from this, a short definition of Game is:

The practice of challenging women.

Being a challenge to women means sexual entitlement. It means teasing, testing, and refusing her tests. It means behavior that shapes women’s impressions of you as a higher value man, which in turn means a more sexually attractive man. Most if not all game concepts and tactics — negs, compliance hoops, freeze-outs, the poon commandments, storytelling, preselection, abundance mentality, flipping the script, disqualification — can be collectively grouped under the category of How to be a Challenge to Women.

Why do women want a challenging man? Women are unique in this way. Men have no desire for challenging women. Men love nothing more than sweet women who make their lives easier and don’t play head games. Women, in stark contrast, need challenging men (especially in the early going of a courtship) because their particular psychologies emerge from a biological substrate that is designed to function on cues supplied by non-physical and thus less conspicuous male traits, such as men’s social status and attractiveness to other women.

Being a challenge has the same effect on women as a slender hourglass figure and pretty face have on men: Urgent stimulation.


  1. Extreme confidence…


  2. Confidence, challenge, dominance…


  3. I’m a feminist because … I’m too scared to challenge women!


  4. Often, if you’re a man on a mission, you don’t even realize you’re being a challenge because you’re preoccupied with something else. Being a challenge, however, is incredibly fun when you realize you’re doing it.

    If you’re in a LTR or want a chick in your harem to stick around a bit longer because you just can’t get enough of DAT ASS, you must sometimes force yourself to slow down and pay attention to her. Just a bit of commitment to keep her hooked. Take her to a nice dinner (but make sure it’s one of your favorite places), participate in a morning-after cuddle session (be sure you got some pussy the night before), make her breakfast in bed (obviously for the both of you), etc. These “acts of beta” also come with a hint of self-pleasure so as to keep your value high while showing vulnerability.

    Game is fun.


  5. Doc Love at askmen dot com twelve years ago was my first reading of the formal breakdown of Game. He said that Game (he called it “the system”) has three pillars — the “three c’s” — Challenge, Confidence, and (self-) Control. To my blue-pill self at the time, the latter two made immediate sense, but being a “challenge” to women was a novel idea at the time because it went against the feminist concepts I absorbed from school and popular culture.


    • @PA “Challenge” is the hardest game concept. The “push” part of push/pull is where guys lose their nerve…myself included. Shark wrote something to the effect “never make it too easy for a girl”….It’s true, though not always apparent. Often when I’m gaming a girl, get no where, then disappear, when I reappear or meet up they’re usually very eager to talk and pick up where we left off…


  6. Pervasive persuasiveness.


  7. Why people comment here?


  8. A cheerful I-don’t-give-a-shit-attitude topped off with a shit-eating grin.


  9. #textsfromlastnight

    Me: [bragging about something sexual]
    Her: And so modest about it
    Me: What’s the point of that statement?
    Her: Nothing
    Me: Would modesty turn you on? Just say so
    Her: No actually, it wouldn’t
    Her: Just running my mouth again
    Her: I’ve never had someone call me out on things as quickly as you.
    Me: How does that make you feel?
    Her: I enjoy the lack of bullshit
    Her: Sometimes it’s unnerving
    Me: Haha it’s your own bullshit!
    Her: Yes I realize

    Last time we hung out, I got a BJ in my car then went back to work.


  10. I forget where I heard this, but I like ‘game is escalation.’ The ability to escalate from meeting to fucking, using whatever tools you have at your disposal, is game to me.


    In other news, surprised at what a difference makeup and style can do for a woman —>


    She looks so much better in the second pic to me. If she can change her look for the better, I’m pretty sure that if fug feminists a) lost weight, b) learned how to apply makeup, and c) dressed like women…i.e. became more feminine…they would soon lose their ‘need’ of feminism.

    [CH: I would include escalation under the umbrella of “being a challenge to women”. Pushing a women inexorably toward sex is challenging her instinctual reticence.]


  11. on July 28, 2014 at 12:25 pm holisticgame

    I think my own definition of game is simply “nonphysical evaluation of women.”

    If you can ignore their looks and evaluate their romantic and sexual potential based on who they truly are, you’re automatically a challenge. Any time I take a girls looks into consideration, everything gets MUCH harder.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I can agree with that statement. Perversely, that’s why I have no luck with women unless they have no looks to speak of.

      I manage to get in the right state occasionally with a pretty one, but it’s like trying to ride an electric bull. How many seconds will this last before I get thrown off?

      I need to find a different hobby. This hobby sucks.


  12. Game: the facsimile of power


  13. So i get what charisma is, but what does ‘charm’ mean?

    Typically traditional self improvement books say charm is “taking sincere interest in others”. Is there 2 versions of charm? One for friends, one for mates?



    • on July 28, 2014 at 2:38 pm Zombie Shane

      Having a twinkle in your eye. Saying something clever and unusual [but not “creepy”]. Being the cheerful upbeat optimistic guy when everyone else has abandoned all hope.


    • “taking sincere interest in others” is in the right direction

      people want things. generally to feel happy or fulfilled in some way. people will gravitate towards individuals that invoke said feelings or help them to reach said fulfillment

      charm is discerning what an individual responds to, employing interpersonal techniques to elicit said desires, and thereby garnering favor with others to likely further your own ends.

      no disrespect to ZS; but for example, some people don’t respond to cheerful and upbeat. some people (women) are made happy through snark, indifference, or even outright cruelty.

      in that case being positive and taking an interest isn’t charming, but grating


      • on July 28, 2014 at 6:00 pm Zombie Shane

        > “snark, indifference, or even outright cruelty”

        Oh for fuck’s sake, did you come from a universe made of anti-matter? You are NOT describing “charm” in any ordinary standard sane use of the word.


      • on July 28, 2014 at 6:05 pm Zombie Shane

        Which is not to imply that Blue City/Blue State chicks won’t get totally wet between the legs for your snark, indifference, and outright cruelty – we all know damned well that they are infatuated with that shit. But they aren’t attracted to your charm, they are attracted to your EVIL.


      • “But they aren’t attracted to your charm, they are attracted to your EVIL”

        Clarity FTW


      • “charming devil”, “devilish charm” are colloquialisms I’m sure you’ve heard before. The association wasn’t just happenstance.

        Similarly, charm can be paired with ideas of pleasantry or agreeableness; “a charming house in the country”, etc.

        Neither are wrong. The root of the word charm most aptly lies in its usage as a verb rather than an adjective, however, for both being associated with an action and therefore a result, the hallmarks of man (it was “approach week” here not “self-describe week”).

        1. delight greatly.
        “the books have charmed children the world over”
        synonyms: delight, please, win (over)
        –> gain or influence by charm.
        “he charmed her into going out”
        synonyms: coax, cajole, wheedle; More

        2.control or achieve by or as if by magic.
        “pretending to charm a cobra”

        Both moral dichotomies are applicable in the execution of the action of delighting others, gaining influence, winning over.

        What works in your neck of the woods or helps you sleep is all well and good. In smaller populations wherein K-selection and community in-grouping is higher you risk getting BTFO by going with rakishness, thus it is prudent to be “good” so you don’t get shut out of the meat market by ruffling too many feathers.

        In urban environments wherein there is a larger population (arguably therefore r-oriented) and thereby greater competition paired with the dissolution of tight-knit communal sentiments it is another trick in the bag to have roguish demeanor that is a departure from “I would very much like to treat you nicely and go steady so that you’ll give up the pussy for me to make my future sons eventually”.

        If you need any more convincing of the inherent amorality of the sexual market, please consider exhibits: tinder, large college campuses, divorce statistics.


      • on July 28, 2014 at 9:08 pm Zombie Shane

        But you’re equating White Magic with Black Magic:

        Gandalf CHARMED the hobbits with his fireworks display.

        Wormtongue CHARMED King Theoden with his half-truths and lies.

        Don’t abuse the language like that.


    • Charm is making people like you, making people feeling good about themselves and being around you.


    • You often hear the comment from a charmed girl, “He made me feel like I was the only girl in the room.”

      Charm is focus, as in charming a snake. But focus she has to earn. Focus without her working for it is just creepy.


  14. 3 words
    Check your bitch


  15. Having enough VALUE to be able to challenge women SUCCESSFULLY.


  16. The Prize


  17. social dominance


  18. What’s really needed is a factual, non-inflammatory landing page where I can direct people to learn what women are all about. A lot of this stuff turns off ordinary people, and they just won’t read it because (a) it’s full of PUA jargon or (b) it’s mean-spirited and getting back at the feminists for ruining our lives. Just something that lays out the truth as it is, in a matter-of-fact voice, and makes men (and women) say, “oh, so THAT’S why women act that way!”

    Right now there’s too much bullshit (think of it as “the caring asshole who turns people off”) as opposed to the neutral way (the “uncaring asshole who turns women on”). If this page exists then please let me know about it.


    • concern troll gonna concern.


    • “A lot of this stuff turns off ordinary people, and they just won’t read it because (a) it’s full of PUA jargon or (b) it’s mean-spirited and getting back at the feminists for ruining our lives.”

      Harland, it’s mostly (c) they don’t want to hear it. The truth itself is inflammatory. I don’t think this blog is mean spirited against women generally. In fact, deep down CH is a romantic.


  19. […] definition of game: for the next time a nominalist/essentialist argument breaks out on the […]


  20. Two words: Trolling women

    [CH: i like it.]


  21. on July 31, 2014 at 5:12 pm gregariouswolf

    This is not as succinct as some of the other characterizations, but I look at it like this: Outer game is minimizing the negatives. Inner game is maximizing the positives.

    Minimizing negatives in outer game is getting rid of those things that would cause you to be dismissed out of hand, such as poor hygiene, submissive posture, mumbly speech, and avoidant behavior. I look at classic pua techniques as learning how to not shoot yourself in the foot with women. Inner game is about developing your identity by improving those things that make you self-actualized person. Working on your knowledge, creativity, experience, education, career, and what have you.