Comment Of The Week: Hurty Hurty Hippos Edition

HerewardMW proposes a sterling idea,

Lets actually have a prison for fat people. The perimeter wall will be five feet high and the bars three feet apart. The prison will have a gym. If you can escape you’re free to go.

What percentage of fat feminists do you think would stay locked up for life, bitching and moaning the whole time about thin privilege and the unfairness of denying them prison bars five feet apart? 99%?

Runner-up comment winner is Dirk Johanson,

I once read a novel where there was a scene where a circus fat lady on the verge of death got fucked to death in a gang-bang – she enjoyed it so much, eventually her heart gave way. Its a pretty disgusting thought to me – especially the part where the guy was describing that her shit-smell was permeating the circus tent- but for guys that are really undersexed and can’t afford a good-looking hooker, that type of thing could be a revenue-generator for the concentration camps.  After all, all that food won’t be cheap.

It’s this kind of creative free association that makes the Chateau so respectable among mainstream media outlets.





Comments


  1. This tottaly made my day!, have a great one tonite bros.

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  2. Been strongly feeling like smashing a semi-whale recently. One of the ones who would be a 7+ if they weren’t fat.

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  3. Read on jizzabel that Hugo Schwyzer is making a movie from the same novel and approached Rosie O’donnell and Oprah.

    Everyone should checkout anonymousconservative on his theory on k vs. r evolutionary theory. Some gems.

    “K-selection is the origin of the political right, or as it is known in America, political conservatism. It produces a model of human which is competitive, aggressive, protective, monogamous, prone to favor high-investment in offspring and family values, prone to delaying sexual activity in the young, and prone to exhibit honor, loyalty, decency, respect for tradition, and other pro-social traits designed to help the ingroup function better, so it can defeat other rival groups in competition for limited resources. In this model, females are designed to nurture the young, and guide them away from dangers and threats which the male is programmed to deal with violently and swiftly for the maximum utility for the ingroup.”

    “Humans being k-selected aren’t programmed to revere manly, obnoxious, promiscuous women, and cowardly, effete, disloyal, and unreliable man-children.”

    “Liberalism is not an intellectual, ultra-compassionate psychology designed to produce a perfect utopia in which no one ever suffers. Indeed quite the opposite. It is a simple, biologically imbued psychology, designed to exploit conditions of free resources by fostering the reproduction of specimens which most aggressively satiate their basest urges, without contributing to the success of their society. Promiscuity, single parenting, early onset of first intercourse, and conflict and risk avoidance through cowardice.

    Liberalism is a philosophy which will inevitably devolve any population which adopts it, taking moral, decent, courageous, productive specimens, and gradually replacing them with a population of cowardly and entitled imbeciles, unable to fend for themselves, and all too willing to enslave the productive to serve them, using force of government.”

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    • As long as the old conservative patriarch is allowed to quietly have his way with the nanny and a few mistresses and, if his wife dies first, it must be expected that he can remarry the hottest college age daughter of a fellow conservative.

      If he won’t (or wouldn’t be socially allowed to) do that, but secretly wants to, then he is the coward and the liberal patriarchs like Clinton clean up with their daring, non-withstanding the way the liberal patriarchs stab other men in the back with their public support for feminism and wealth transfers.

      It started in the 1820’s (the Great Awakening) when American conservative males were made into pussified house husbands who spent the next 90 years pushing for women to get the vote so they could help ban things like prostitution and alcohol. When Grover Cleveland got a young woman pregnant in the 1880’s, the Republican males dressed like women holding fake babies saying “Ma, Ma where’s my Pa” and didn’t realize how stupid they looked. Cleveland won reelection with statements like “It all goes to show I’m still virile”.

      To this day, the Republican Party needs to work very hard to shed it’s image of being a place for wimpy hen-pecked beta husbands, and I say that as someone who has always leaned to the right. We lost two guaranteed senate seats in the last election, IN and MO, because religious fanatics were on the ticket instead of small government fanatics.

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  4. “Lets actually have a prison for fat people. The perimeter wall will be five feet high and the bars three feet apart. The prison will have a gym. If you can escape you’re free to go.”

    Three feet is pretty generous. Can we make the bars airline seat width, about 20 inches? Turning sideways not allowed.

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    • on August 23, 2013 at 2:55 pm RappaccinisDaughter

      Some men have shoulders wide enough that they slop over airline seats regardless of their obesity level. Make it the size of a first-class airline seat, though, and I think we’re in business.

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      • I can pass through a 1 foot gap, or maneuver easily in a 1 1/2 foot wide corridor, while holding an unslung, full length battle rifle; because I’m not so stupid that it doesn’t occur to me to turn the rifle vertically and my body sideways.

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    • My first thought, too. Three-feet isn’t the right dimensions.

      That said, how would your epic rack fit through? How would Rapp’s stone-hard fakies? This is discriminatory against voluptuous women in both the original and the new fat-acceptance connotations of the term.

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      • Epic rack? The hell you say!

        AND the ability to quote GGR?

        AND a talent for decent puns?

        OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!

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  5. The solution to third world hunger problems: Human Veal.

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  6. The prison for fat people is 100 pounds of that gelatinous ooze called….fat.

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  7. I don’t think this prison design is aiming remotely high enough. The bars may as well not exist at 3′, since all but the most incredibly extreme fatties will be able to walk out as easily as going through any common door. The wall presents more of a challenge, but fat people are disgusting, not stupid. Lots of suggestions come to mind. She could, for instance, take off all her clothes and wait for one of the prison guards to come along. Those guys are all mentally unbalanced and sexually desperate, and somebody would take her up on it. All she has to do is offer to piss in his face or shit in his mouth, which he will accept gleefully (yeah, cousin, I’m talking about you, freak!), and while she’s squatting over his breathing apparatus, she merely has to lower herself to the point where she suffocates the man with her corpulent blubber rolls. Stash the body in the prison freezer, then repeat until there are enough dead prison guards to stack up into stairs. Voilà, escaped land whale.

    As such, I suggest making the bars 1.5′ apart and the wall 8′ high. I think that would add enough additional obstacles to take care of the problem.

    Or we could just fucking shoot them in the head and be done with it.

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  8. Thank you, CH, for the honor.

    The novel was Loon Lake, BTW, by E.L. Doctorow.

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    • I once read a novel where there was a scene where a circus fat lady on the verge of death got fucked to death in a gang-bang – she enjoyed it so much, eventually her heart gave way. Its a pretty disgusting thought to me – especially the part where the guy was describing that her shit-smell was permeating the circus tent-

      Ah, yes… (yet) another example of “literature” from our friends with the high IQs.

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  9. on August 24, 2013 at 9:25 am Hugh G. Rection

    Someone once suggested just making the aisles with the shit food in the supermarket narrower. Then again we’d have to agree on what food is shit.

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  10. If you actually wanted to cure this world of obesity make all types of bathing illegal. that is all

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  11. Beautiful.

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  12. gg, if i’ve ever used this expression better

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  13. […] Filed under: Comment Winners, Hungry Hungry Hippos …read more […]

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  14. “All that food …”

    Waste of good food.

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  15. You crazy, HerewardMW? Liberals would be ECSTATIC in said prison — free food, not having to work, can’t speak their minds without being punished, FREE HEALTH CARE. DON’T FUCKING give them ideas!

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